Crazy trouble with love part 6

Hilda and Oga

Series: Beelzebub

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Oga was walking with Beel towards a convenience store as he grumbled. "Damn Hilda telling me to get her some damn parenting magazine, baby toys and diapers, you don't even wear diapers Beel."

"Ba."

"Agreed, she's being ridiculous, but it would be interesting to see her try to force one on you." He chuckled as they entered the store.

"Ba!" Spoke Beel shaking his head.

"Whatever, let's just find that junk she wanted." He said as he looked around and spotted a magazine. "Well, there's that stupid magazine she wanted." He grabbed it and tossed it in the basket while Beel looked around and spotted some candy on an opposite shelf.

He began to reach for it and try to grab it. "Ba!" He cried, getting Oga's attention.

"No one can, Hilda said if you had any sweets while we were out she'd make my day hell." He rolled his eyes.

"BA!" He said in annoyance as he hit Oga's head.

"Hey, stop that, I'm not changing my mind Beel." He said with a frown. "Let's just get the rest of the stuff and go home."

Beel gained a tick mark and kept hitting Oga's head while said boy tried hard to ignore him while getting the stuff on the list. "BA!"

"Hey, I said I wasn't going to get you candy, now stop that or else you'll regret it." He said with a frown as he approached the register.

"Can I help you sir?" Asked the cashier who tried to ignore the scene.

"Yeah, I'd like this junk, now how much do I owe you?" He asked as he set it on the counter.

"That will be….1600 yen sir."

"Fine, here ya go." He said as he dropped the money on the counter as the cashier put the items in a bag as Beel kept hitting his head. "I told you to stop Beel."

"BA! Ba ba ba ba!"

His eye twitched. "Fine! I'll get you something, but don't go blaming it on me when Hilda finds out." He said as he quickly grabbed a candy bar and threw the cashier five hundred yen. "I'm taking this too. Now eat up Beel."

"Ba!" He said happily as he began to eat the chocolate as Oga left the store, getting most of it on his face as he ate.

'Damn it.' He thought as he kept walking. 'I just know Hilda is going to bitch at me for this.'

(Later)

"What did I tell you?" Frowned the maid while Beel had finished his candy bar and she had Oga holding a huge weight making him sit on his knees.

"Not to let him eat chocolate…..now get this off of me!" He groaned angrily. "How did you even get me to hold this?"

"No, you can handle any sort of fight, so you can hold that until I say so." She frowned while a small demonic bird flew in through the window with a letter in it's beak. "And until I say so, you will stay there and reflect on why you shouldn't disobey me." She said as she took the letter and opened it.

'Damn woman.' He groaned as he watched her read the letter. "Well, what does it say? Does it say you're being sacked?" He groaned.

Her eyes widened while she was silent and dropped the letter. "No...the lord can't be serious…"

"What is it?" He groaned as he tried to look at the letter.

"This is insane, just….oh lord…" She muttered without answering.

Oga groaned before lifting the weight up and tossed it to the side before taking the letter and reading it. "Come on, it can't be that bad." He said as he read the letter.

'Hilda, I've had some time to think on it, and decided that the best way for Beel to grow up as the future ruler, he needs good role models. And I've heard that kids grow up better with two parents. As such, I want you and Oga to try and act like a married couple to further help him feel like he's in a family.'

"...WHAT?!" He shouted in disbelief.

'This means that you and him have to act like you love each other, you can't fight a lot, and do everything a married couple does. Well, have fun! Sincerely, the Great Demon Lord.'

"Has he lost his mind?!"

"No….he is the Great Demon Lord….his word is law….I….I have to do some research…" She said as she got up.

"She can't be serious, even she wouldn't do that." Remarked Oga to Beel who just looked confused. "She's probably just going to tell him that she won't do it….yeah, that's gotta be it…" He said as he picked up Beel. "Come on, let's play some videogames."

"Ba!"

Meanwhile, Hilda was walking down the street towards the library, trying to process the new order she had just been given. 'Act like a married couple? That's preposterous, but at the same time, if the lord feels that would help the master's growth, I must do it, even if I have to degrade myself to an act with that man.' She thought with a shudder before heading into the library and went to the front desk where a man was typing on his computer. "Excuse me? I need information on….married couples."

"Oh? Sure thing, you can find some books on marriage just down row 3 and on the left hand shelf."

"Thanks." She said as she began to walk into the library and began to look around before seeing the aisle. 'I just hope this will help me understand what exactly me and Oga need to do.' She grabbed one book and pulled it out before opening it up. 'Well...how bad could it be?' She thought as she began to read.

(Later)

Hilda walked out of the library holding several of the books with a frown on her face. 'Why is it humans have to abide by so many customs just for marriage?' She thought as she glared at the books. 'And now I have to abide by them as well because the Great Demon Lord has commanded it…. That idiot better follow these customs as well, or else I will make him.'

When she got home and headed upstairs she saw Oga waving a cat teaser toy over Beel who hopped up and down to try and grab it. "Oga, what are you doing? You do know our son isn't a cat, correct?"

"I know, but I wanted to see how he would act like if I used it." He replied before blinking and looked at her. "Wait, did you just say 'our' son?"

"Yes, from now on I will not be calling him master, but rather I will call him our son, like it says too in these books dear husband."

He blinked before bursting into laughter and dropped the toy while Beel played with it while he held his stomach. "Ha ha ha! You're actually going to go through with that? That is hilarious, you're even calling me your husband!" He laughed as she frowned.

She walked over and pulled on his ear making him stop and cry out. "From now on no treating our son like a cat, he's a young boy who doesn't need something like that affecting him later on in life."

"Ow! Hey, stop it! He doesn't seem to mind it!" He shouted as she kept pulling on his ear. "OW! Fine, I'll stop it if he wants me too!"

"Ba!" Spoke Beel holding the fuzzy end up with enjoyment as he rubbed it against his cheek.

"See! He likes it, now let go of me you damn woman!" He said in annoyance.

"Say the magic word."

"Ugh….please….." He groaned as he glared at her as she grinned.

"That's better." She let go and picked Beel up. "Tonight I'll get supper made, and if you're good Beel then you can get a treat."

"BA!" He said happily as she walked away with him, leaving Oga on the floor.

"Damn it, I can't believe she's taking this so quickly." He grumbled as he got up. "Maybe she'll give up after a bit or something? It's not like she's going to go along with this forever just because of a letter, right?" He asked himself as he began to walk towards the kitchen.

(Later)

"Open wide." She said as she tried to feed Beel a spoonful of applesauce. "Come on Beel, eat up."

"Ba." He spoke turning his head away.

"Come on Beel, you have to eat it, open wide for the airplane!" She said as she tried to get him to eat it.

"Ba." He spoke before looking at Oga and waved his arms at him. "Ba ba!"

"Huh? What is it Beel?" He asked as he looked at the green haired baby.

"He wants his daddy to feed him." Spoke Hilda before handing him the applesauce. "Go ahead."

"Fine...eat up." He said as he tried to push a spoonful of applesauce into his mouth.

Beel opened up and took it into his mouth with a smile while Oga repeated this and Hilda used a napkin to wipe the baby's cheek if any of it spilt out.

"There, done." He said as Beel ate the last of the applesauce. "Let's get out of here Beel, there's some video games with our names on them."

"Hold up, nothing too extreme, he's too young for anything too graphic."

"Oh come on, you and him are literally from hell! And we've been there before! How could a video game be worse than that? The kid listens to death metal to go to sleep!" he spoke with annoyance.

"Easy Oga, it's best to listen to your wife's tips." Teased his sister.

"I've gone toe to toe with demons nonstop, and she thinks a video game is too graphic? I think you should skip that lesson or book or whatever you used to look up that stuff." He remarked to Hilda before picking Beel up and headed upstairs.

"Oga, you listen to me! I am your wife!" She said as she began to follow him. "I just want what's best for my son!"

"Then wouldn't it be best to let him do whatever he wants? Let him cause trouble whenever he wants."

"No, then that would draw attention and he won't grow up powerful and become the being who will wipe out all humans, he needs to be raised properly." She said as they entered his room. "To truly grow is to work small and slowly instill fear in others, but before that he must know how to battle. That's why starting today we'll all be practicing techniques that will help him."

"I got that down already." He spoke before putting a dvd into the tv as a martial arts fighting scene showed up. "All he needs is watching this stuff and he'll be ready in no time." He said before chuckling. "And like I said when we first met, I'm not going to raise him so he can kill all humans."

"Well of course, that would be bad to kill my in-laws." She replied before sighing. "Fine, we'll try this, but if he stays up too late cause he has too much energy than you're sleeping on the couch."

"Whatever." He said as he rolled his eyes as they watched Beel try to copy the moves on tv. When he felt her sit down next to him closely he blinked. "Oi, why are you so close to me?" He asked as he looked at her in confusion.

"Just sticking close to you dear."

"Ok, are you really going to keep this up, there's no way you're enjoying this, right?" He asked with a frown.

"If it means to help with Beel's growing up, then I'll do whatever it takes."

"Come on, we were raising him fine, now because of a letter you got we're suppose to act all lovey dovey?" He asked as he raised an eyebrow.

"No, like a wife." She replied while laying her head on his shoulder. "I can be loving, but also strict when need be."

"But we're not married, you know that." He groaned in annoyance as he watched Beel try to do a jump kick. He fell on his butt and frowned before getting up to try it again.

"Well, we could easily fix that if that's the problem, anything to make sure Beel grows up happy." She said, surprising him.

"Wait, what are you getting at?"

"Well, if necessary I would not be opposed to marrying you Oga, so do you want to if that is your complaint?"

His eyes widened before holding his arms up in a 'X' formation. "Not gonna happen."

"Alright, whatever you say husband." She said with a shrug as he groaned.

'I hope this doesn't have to go on for too long.'

(Later)

Beel had finally gotten tired of watching martial arts and Oga was getting ready for bed.

He yawned and crawled under the covers, but that's when he saw Hilda walking over while setting Beel on his chest before she started taking her clothes off. "Oi, what are you doing Hilda?" He asked with a small blush as she kept stripping.

"As a married couple we have to share a bed, and until we can get a crib for Beel he'll sleep with us to show he can trust us."

"Eh? No, no way, I can deal with Beel sleeping with me, but there's no way you are too!" He spoke while seeing her underwear and turned away with a brighter blush.

"Well, it doesn't matter what you say, because it's happening." She said as she began to crawl into the bed with him. She made herself comfy next to him and pulled the sheets over them while making sure Beel was safely between them and draped an arm over him with her hand resting on Oga's chest. "Goodnight dear."

"Ugh...goodnight Hilda….this is not happening again." He muttered as he began to close his eyes.

(Next day)

Oga yawned as he began to wake up and tried to get up only to realize something was holding him down. He looked down and blinked since he saw Hilda resting on his chest while feeling something on his head, which he had to guess was Beel. 'How did they even get on top of me?' He thought as he looked at Hilda sleep, her arms wrapped around him as she slept.

She was breathing softly and silently while cuddling against him like a real wife.

'Huh….when she isn't being all annoying she is really beautiful…' He thought as he stared at her. He blinked and shook his head. 'Where'd that come from? She's still the annoying woman who turned my life all batshit crazy.' He thought before he felt her beginning to stir.

"Mmmm….five more minutes…" She groaned softly as she tried to bury her head into his chest.

He looked at her with a deadpanned look and was tempted to make her wake up, but sighed and relaxed. 'I'll let her sleep, it's not time to head to school anyway.' He thought before realizing something. 'Wait...is she going to try to follow me to school?'

It was a few more minutes before Hilda started to slowly stir. "Ugh….this mattress is a lot softer than my usual one…" She said as she began to open her eyes.

"Well you're not on one, you're on me."

"Huh? Oh….I guess I am…." She said as she looked down at him. "Good morning husband."

"Good morning...can you get off of me now?"

"Oh right, I need to get breakfast ready." She spoke before moving off and got out of the bed just as Beel slid down over Oga's face without waking up. "Can you wake up Beel please? Thanks."

"Fine….hey, get up Beel, it's time for breakfast." He spoke nudging the baby who twitched and rolled down onto his chest without waking. "Come on, wake up, don't act like you can't hear me." He said as he poked Beel again.

The baby groaned before slowly opening his eyes.

"There we go, now come on Beel, we gotta get ready for the day." He said as he picked him up. He then got out of bed and put some clothes on before he began to carry Beel downstairs. When they got there he saw Hilda wearing an apron making breakfast with a hum. 'Wow...she looks good in an apron.' He thought as he sat down. "So, what's for breakfast Hilda?"

"Pancakes, they should be done soon, then we can go to school."

"So you are going." He muttered while half disappointed half relieved. "Mind if I ask why you're going to follow me to school?"

"To keep an eye on our son and to make sure no one tries something with you."

"Really? Come on, that's not going to happen." He said as he rolled his eyes.

She looked him dead in the eye and raised an eyebrow. "Then you wouldn't mind if I came with you then dear husband."

He opened his mouth, but sighed in defeat. "Fine, whatever."

"Good, I thought so." She said with a smile.

(Later)

Oga frowned as he walked to school with Beel on his back as Hilda clung to his arm as they walked. "Why are you holding my arm like this?"

"Because this is how married couples act dear husband, do you not like it?"

"I didn't say that." He admitted without thinking. "It's just...are you actually enjoying this?"

"That is not a factor here...but I don't dislike it." She said with a faint blush as they neared the school. 'I actually thought his chest was comfy…'

"Well….don't start anything, ok?" He asked as he felt a small blush on his face. 'Why am I feeling embarrassed? This shouldn't be messing with my head.' He thought as they walked in the gates. "Well….lets just get to class."

"Of course dear." She replied while not noticing how all the students stopped what they were doing when they saw the couple.

"Whoa, Oga and Hilda are really acting like a real couple!"

"Weird, usually you'd think they barely tolerate the other."

"Maybe they're going to couple counselling?"

'Dumbasses, don't go talking loud enough to where we can hear you.' He thought in annoyance as they kept walking before Aoi and her friend rounded the corner and saw them.

"O-Oga?" She blinked while stunned. She was seeing Hilda, not frowning, holding onto Oga's arm, and him not getting annoyed. "Are...are they dating now?" She asked in shock. "I thought they didn't like each other?"

Her friend was wide eyed and just as surprised. 'Wow, I didn't see that coming...I hope sis isn't upset by this.'

"Hey Aoi, how ya doin?" Oga said with a wave.

"Oh! Um...fine, and you two?"

"Me and my husband are doing well." Said Hilda with a frown as she tightened her grip on him. "We were just going on our way to class."

"H-Husband!?" Aoi said in shock. "You two got married?"

"Not legally yet, although I was thinking of stopping by the agency after school was over." Remarked Hilda.

"Wait, what?!" Oga said in shock as she began to drag him away. "You are going to what?!"

"To truly seem like a married couple, it's a good idea to actually get married so Beel doesn't become confused when he grows up and learns the truth."

"Don't I have a say in this?!" He asked in shock as they reached the classroom.

"Do you want to go against the Great Demon Lord's orders?" She frowned. "Because if so, I'll be a widow afterwards."

"Damn it...you said we didn't need to get married last night!" He groaned. "Why are you changing your mind now?"

"I'm merely doing it for our son's future, don't you want what's best for him?" She asked while holding Beel up to his face.

"Yeah, but I don't think we need to get married!" He said back as he took Beel from her.

"Ba ba!" Spoke up Beel raising his hands.

"Oh come on! Not you too!" He groaned.

"Come on Oga, you know it's going to happen either way, so you can go along or wake up married to me."

"Ba ba, ba ba!" Spoke Beel while giving a thumbs up.

"No! I've gone along with a lot of crazy stuff ever since I met you two, but no way! There is no way I'm going down to the marriage agency and marrying you!"

(Later)

"Congratulations, I now pronounce you man and wife." Said a random employee as she stamped a piece of paper. "Here is your marriage certificate, we will keep a copy here."

"Thanks." Said Hilda happily as she took the paper as Oga looked at it in shock.

"What...what just happened?"

"You two are officially married sir."

"...Damn it." He groaned as Hilda took his arm and began to lead him out of the building. "How did I let you talk me into this?"

"I never stopped bugging you and you said 'Screw it, if it'll shut you up then let's get married.' and here we are." She said with a smile.

He groaned and rubbed his head. 'Fuck!'

'Well, it's official, me and him are married and yet...I don't hate it?' She thought as she stared at him. 'I know I'm growing accustomed to this, but why is it so fast and easy? It's like I was hoping or anticipating something like this would happen, but that's completely insane.' She thought as she shook her head. 'Am I sick or something?'

"So, any chance we can just get this annulled quickly?"

"Out of the question, it's as your humans say, till death do us part."

"Oh come on! You're a demon, do you even count as being alive?" He groaned.

Smack!

"Does that answer your question?" She frowned while Oga rubbed the spot.

"Ok fine, but if you start harping on me to get a job then we're gonna have an issue."

"Don't worry, you're still in school, but once you graduate or when summer comes you can guarantee I will make you get one." She said with a smile.

He groaned before they turned a corner and saw a group of thugs blocking them off with various weapons in hand. "Finally, I've been looking for an excuse to blow off some steam." He said with a grin.

"Oi, you the big guy around named Oga?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?" He asked with a grin as he cracked his knuckles.

"We're here to kick your ass and go down in history as the toughest gang around." Smirked another as several others slowly surrounded them.

"Hey boss, I think this bitch here is his wife."

"Really? Great, after we beat the shit out of him we'll take her!" The leader said with a grin.

"What about this kid on his back?"

"...Take it to an orphanage? What are we supposed to do with a baby?"

"Touch our son and you won't live to see tomorrow." Threatened Hilda in a cold tone.

"Damn, she looks like she's gonna gut us." Shuddered one of the goons.

"Whatever, let's fight!" Shouted the leader as he tried to punch Oga.

(Later)

"Oh…"

"My legs…."

"Damn, you guys are the weakest gang I've ever fought. Let's get out of here Hilda."

"Of course dear." She said as she grabbed his arm, making him groan as they began to walk away.

"Do you really have to do that?"

"Would you prefer carrying me like your bride?"

"What? No, come on, stop acting like this! It's not like you want me too, right?"

She was silent before looking away. "It's not like I'm against it."

"Wait...do you want me to carry you?" He asked in surprise.

"I admit, seeing a picture of a groom carrying his bride is something I am curious to experience."

"...Fine, do you really want me to carry you?" He asked as he held out his arms.

"Yes." She jumped up and landed in his arms while getting comfy. "Now let's go home dear." She said with a smile. 'I feel like a real bride now.'

He sighed and carried her while Beel held onto his back with a smile. 'I swear if she was like this more of the time she might not be as annoying.' He thought as they neared his house. 'I just hope my family doesn't go crazy or anything when they see this.'

But as soon as he opened the door and walked in, his sister was walking by, stopped at the scene, and slowly smiled.

"Don't say a word."

"Nope. MOM, DAD! THEY GOT HITCHED!" She shouted loudly with a smile.

"IDIOT!" He shouted as he tried to run to the stairs before his mom and dad ran towards him.

"Oga!" They cried out while stunned at the scene before his mom ran off and came back with a camera before taking pictures.

"Why didn't you tell me you and Hilda were going to get married?" She asked as she took pictures.

"Because she tricked me into it!" He groaned. "I'm going upstairs."

"Ok, we'll just leave then, make sure Beel is in another room, have fun!" His sister said with a grin as she began to pull her mom and dad out the front door.

"Huh? Wait it's not like that!"

"Give us a new grandkid you two!" His mom called before the door closed behind them.

His face was red while he put Hilda down. 'This isn't some honeymoon!'

"Well….should we do what they said?" She asked curiously. "We are married now after all."

"No! Not gonna happen." He spoke quickly.

"Why? That's something married couples do, and we are married, so what's the problem?" She asked as she picked up Beel and put him down as she turned on the tv and set it to a kids show.

"Because that's a big thing, how do you expect us to raise two kids like it's a walk in the park?"

"Well, financially the demon lord would support us for everything we need. Plus, we're doing ok raising Beel." She said with a shrug. "And if you want to wait...we could use a condom."

He fell down anime style at the simple answer while Beel clapped at the show. 'I think I preferred how things were going up to this point.'