Hello everyone !
Here is a new chapter of this story ! And I have to say that I like it pretty much this one :) It feels as if we're beginning to go somewhere. I hope you will think the same :)
I will also dedicate this chapter to a very dear friend of mine (not sure she'll read this but still) as it is her birthday today. She is my inspiration, my motivator, the one who keeps me writing and who I met throught our respective writing.
I would also like to thank my Beta (and my dear if you read this, please send me an e-mail to tell me if you're okay, I'm worried) and you all readers of the world !
Leave a little comment if you can :)
Enjoy !
Chapter 11:
Merlin once more galloped his way through the foliage, uncaring of the twigs and branches that flogged his face.
He couldn't believe that Arthur had gone behind his back like that.
While he appreciated the irony, given his past as a compulsive liar about his magic, he knew this was something else entirely.
Merlin had never lied to Arthur about his capabilities as a leader but here the king had been looking for another physician behind his back as if he thought Merlin wasn't skilled enough.
It hurt to think that maybe Arthur was right.
No matter how much he wished it, he knew he would never be as skilled as Gaius. He had spent far too much time ignoring his mentor's medical teaching in favour of running after Arthur to save him.
But still, he had thought what little he did have was sufficient.
And, despite the increased workload, he had to admit he liked being a physician. He liked feeling like he was truly helping people. Like what he did really mattered, contrary to his work as Court Advisor where he was being completely disregarded if not ignored more often than not.
Being physician was doing something that Gaius would have been proud of.
He arrived at the castle and went directly to the stables. He ignored Geoffrey, the stable hand, and took his time to care for his mare himself. He had always loving after her. He unsaddled her, brushed her brown coat and finally rewarded her with an apple he discreetly conjured before leaving.
Using one of the servant's entrances, he went into the castle and made his way to his chambers. There, he closed the door and magically locked it, unwilling to be disturbed.
He knew he was being childish and that at some time, most probably sooner rather than later, he would have to go out but, for the moment, he was quite happy to be alone.
Except it left him with far too much silence to be filled with his brain going over every time he had misdiagnosed or mistreated a patient, second-guessing his every move.
He shook himself and forced his thoughts away from that rapidly darkening path. He spotted the mess of discarded books he had left earlier and decided that it was high time to get started on cleaning and organizing.
He could have done it with a flick of his wrist and a flash of his eyes but quickly decided against it and sat himself on the cold floor instead. He called the books to him with a bit of magic and began sorting them, dividing them in different piles around him.
And when Gwaine came knocking at his door, he simply ignored it, feeling guilty but unwilling to talk to anyone for the time being.
Three hours later and he was interrupted from the tidying of his numerous magical artefacts by a knock at the door.
"Sir, I came to remind you that there is a council meeting about to begin." The voice of the servant Arthur had chosen for him informed from the other side of the door. "Will you need my help for anything?"
"No, it's okay Jonathan. I'll be there shortly."
"Fine, sir." Merlin saw in his mind's eye the servant bowing to the door and winced.
If there was one thing he would never get used to it was that. Having servants respecting him and treating him like nobility. His new position as Advisor didn't change the fact that, in his heart, he was still just a servant and always would be.
He looked at his reflection in the mirror of the corner of the room and sighed again. He couldn't turn up at the meeting wearing dust-covered clothes. He quickly changed into a more suitable outfit, vaguely tried to comb his unruly hair and left.
For once, he didn't arrive last and took his seat to Arthur's right without a glance at the monarch.
He knew he was unfair but lacked the will to stop.
Arthur looked like he wanted to say something but stopped himself, knowing that this discussion couldn't take place in the middle of the court room.
Merlin watched the king turn towards the councillors and open the meeting.
For the next hour, Merlin found his attention wandering as noble after noble spoke, presenting this issue or that.
He felt Arthur's eyes on him more often than not but he dutifully ignored it.
It was only when the king pushed himself up to ask if everything had been discussed that Merlin knew what he had to do.
"I think you're forgotten a subject my Lord." He said in his most polite and respectful tone.
Immediately everyone in the room turned towards him, some curious, some clearly annoyed at the fact that he dared open his mouth when usually he rarely talked. Merlin forced himself not to splutter excuses or redden dramatically.
"Yes Merlin?" Arthur asked, obviously caught unaware.
"What about the new Court Physician? I heard we have a legitimate candidate within our own walls." Merlin said, forcing his tone to remain completely calm as he fixed his eyes on the king.
He saw Arthur fight to keep his composure.
"A new Physician?" Lord Geoffrey asked.
"Yes. A woman called Alice." Merlin answered naturally. "She is an old friend of Gaius and I know her. She has a perfect knowledge of her science and would be more than capable of assuming the role."
"I wasn't aware we were looking for one…" The old man said and the warlock saw in his eyes that he knew precisely of whom Merlin was talking about.
The warlock heard the whispered comments about his ineptitude at the job and had to clench his fists very hard to stop himself reacting and fleeing the room.
In the end, he was saved from answering by Arthur who still looked a bit unsettled.
"It came to my attention that it isn't right for a Royal Advisor, such as Merlin, to also assume the heavy and time-consuming duties that are required of a Court Physician. I had therefore sent letters to our allies to recruit a new one. And I want to make it clear that this has nothing to do with Merlin's exemplary work. He is still more than qualified enough to assume the position should you all decide that Alice isn't a suitable replacement."
"Can we meet her then?" Lord Olfric questioned.
"Of course. But I'm afraid it will have to wait until tomorrow as it is already quite late." Arthur answered diplomatically.
The nobles around the table nodded, some not even bothering to hide their relief at being authorized to leave the room.
"Fine. Then we'll reconvene tomorrow at the same time. Dismissed."
At Arthur's word, every noble in the room got up. Merlin didn't waste a second in leaving his seat and the Council Chamber, carefully ignoring the looks sent his way.
In no time, he was back in his chambers and let himself fall on his bed like an overgrown child.
He had no idea what possessed him to bring that out in court. Yet, he supposed it was the only way. Clearly, Arthur wouldn't have been able to make any real objective choice and now he wouldn't have to.
The warlock knew it was a risky situation for Alice, but he also knew that, should the need arise, he would help her escape once more. And find her a good place to live. He owed her that much in the very least.
But he also knew that if she was accepted then this position was the best she could possibly have. It should have been her place years ago. Alongside with Gaius.
He sighed and buried his face in his pillow, inhaling deeply and suddenly missing the scent of herbs that had always been present in his old room.
A knock came only a few minutes later. Merlin was very tempted not to answer. He really didn't want to talk to Arthur right now.
"Merlin? It's Gwen. Can I come in please?"
In truth, she could have entered without asking. She was the queen. Merlin appreciated that she didn't.
"Of course Gwen. Come in." He said, pushing himself into a sitting position, once more trying to rub his hair into a less disarrayed form.
She opened the door slowly and entered, carrying a tray overloaded with food.
Merlin suddenly became aware that it had been a long time since his last meal.
"I thought we might dine together." She explained unnecessarily. "Just you and me for once."
The warlock let out a small smile. It was true that, even if most nights he was in the habit of dining with the king and queen, it was becoming rarer and rarer that Gwen and him had time together. Alone. Like back when they were both servants.
"I'd like that very much." He answered truthfully.
Gwen beamed at him and soon they were sat at the warlock's table.
"You've done some organizing, haven't you?" She noticed.
Merlin felt himself flush.
"Hum… Yes… It was time I think… You like it?"
Gwen let out a small laugh.
"It isn't like you." She commented, seemingly off-hand but Merlin caught the worry beneath the airy tone.
"Yeah…" Merlin agreed.
Gwen seemed to catch on to his serious mood because she caught the hand that had been absently playing with his loaf of bread.
"What is it Merlin? Something is bothering you… You know you can talk to me, right? Always."
Merlin sighed. He knew that. He just was unwilling to burden Gwen with his problems. She already had enough on her plate.
When he said nothing, Gwen carried on, clenching his hand.
"Is this about Alice?"
"Yes… And no…" Merlin hesitated.
"Then what is it?" Gwen prodded gently.
Merlin sighed and stood up, pacing for a moment before answering.
"It's nothing. I know it's stupid but… It feels like Arthur and everyone thinks I've been doing a bad job as physician… And he didn't even tell me! He just went behind my back and looked for a replacement. I know I can't be one to judge with all the lying I have done but still… I thought we were past that…"
Merlin sighed again and was stopped with Gwen in front of him. She didn't say anything but drew him in a tight hug, squeezing him until it almost felt as if he couldn't breathe anymore.
"Oh Merlin!" She said against his neck. "You don't understand. It's not that at all. In fact, it wasn't even Arthur's idea, it was mine."
So, did you like it? How was this little twist?