A/N: Good evening, everyone! I told you guys Friday... so, here it is! It's a rare occurrence that I post twice a week ;) This chapter is a bit long! I delved just a tad into the scene but didn't write it all out for APOV. I ended it where I felt was best, so that you can see how you all can gauge Ana's reaction to Trevor. There's also some tidbits that I needed in there for the future ;)

Anywhoo, enjoy loves! See you at the bottom!

Chapter 8 - All Hope Isn't Lost

APOV

Four and a half years later (Present Time)

Dream sequence

"Come here." I nervously stand before him at the dining table.

"Sit." I immediately comply by sitting on the chair right next to him.

"I'm going to mark that beautiful skin of yours so that no one will ever want you." He tells me with amusement written all over his face and a cigarette between his lips.

He pulls out the cigarette from his mouth and holds my right wrist still on the table, tightly.

"If you scream, remember that I'll gag you!" I nod.

He brings the lit cigarette to my skin and starts piercing it with the blazing hot tip, holding it for a couple of seconds.

"Ahhhhhhh! Ahhhhhh! P-pl-please n-no-no more!" I can't help but scream from the excruciating pain of the cigarette burning my skin.

End of dream sequence

I wake up all sweaty and sticky from, yet, another nightmare. It all feels too real. I check my right wrist for any new cigarette burns, and there are none. Four cigarette burns. That's all I see; relief quickly washes over me. I close my eyes to try and control my ragged breathing. Upon opening them a few minutes later, I look at my bedside, and it's only 5 am, I sigh.

I've only slept for maybe three or four hours, tops. It looks like another night of no sleep. I open up the drawer on my bedside table and pull my diary. It's been quite a while since I've written in my diary, but I feel that it's necessary right now.

As I try to control my breathing, I begin to write.

Dear Diary,

I thought I've moved on, but I'm sad to admit that I haven't. Nightmares from my childhood still evade me. The vile words of the students at Bellevue Prep still echo in my mind. My step father's words, their words, and actions still yield a lot of power over me.

I miss the sensations I'd feel when I used to cut. To feel the sting of a sharp object piercing my skin, and to watch the blood flow down from the fresh wound. Is it weird that I find a tinge of enjoyment through the pain? I choose to make those marks. I choose the angle I cut it in. I choose the area it goes to, and no one else can take that choice away from me. I haven't cut in a couple of years, but that feeling of wanting to pulsates through my blood. I feel free when I can give that control to myself. It's empowering. But, this want… this need… it has to stop.

You are beautiful. You are loved. You are wanted.

~ Rose

After my entry, I put my diary back where it belongs, get out of bed, and slip on my fluffy robe and slippers. I open up the sliding door to my private balcony, light up the mini fireplace, and take a seat on the couch.

I can't help but think about him and where he is right now.

Heaven.

I wish I could just talk to him one more time. I wish I could just be with him one more time. Kiss him one more time. Tell him that… I love him, one more time. Tell him everything and anything.

My mind drifts back to the time we first met in the garden when we were teenagers, and then years later when we met again.

And then I lost him.

Flashback

After a couple of months as CEO of KMP, my whole persona changed. I was no longer the weak minded little girl everyone was able to push around. I was and became Anastasia Rose Kavanagh, proud owner and CEO of Kavanagh Media and Publishing. I oozed dominance in all aspects of my life, the self-confidence that I lacked in the past, and sex appeal to have men kissing the ground I walk on. Though, I still had my own issues; I was able to hide from the outside world, even my family. Most days, I was able to hide it behind the mask I created for myself, it was easy.

My fucking "stepfather," if you can even to call him a father, I snort at the thought of him. I wish he was burning in the depths of hell, but he's got it easy. The fucker is in prison, and I wish I could break him out so that he could see me.

I'm not the little girl he used to get his rocks off by beating the hell out of. I'm not the little girl he almost raped. I'm not the little girl he laughed at.

I've got that little girl hidden so deep inside of me, I only see her in my dreams.

I would never let anyone see that side of me, the weak side of me. I would never let anyone have control over me or my body, unwillingly.

It belongs to me.

I own my body.

I control what happens to it.

xxx xxx

Now, I'm not entirely naive.

There's been a lot of chatter in the break room by a couple of female employees of a lifestyle called BDSM. It sounded familiar to me. Ah, I did a paper on that in a psychology class that I took while in college. Now I remember. I would go as much to say that the lifestyle intrigued me, both being the Dominatrix/Dominant and the submissive peaked my interest enough for me to do further research rather than what the general stuff I was looking up for in college.

In my research, I learned that the submissive has a lot of power in the scene with something as simple as a safeword. But for me? Submissive?

I think not.

I would have to entirely and unquestionably trust someone to be willing to give up my submission to someone, anyone.

And no one has the luxury of that.

But a Dominatrix? Now, that's right up my alley.

I didn't go straight into the scene at any club or public place; I mostly did it in hotel rooms that I'd get for just one night. I went online, order a couple of things, and hired some male escorts from a private agency, since I know I couldn't risk this getting out. Even though my sisters and I did yield a lot of power in the media world, I still wanted to be careful. I hadn't engaged in sexual intercourse with any of the escorts, I just dominated them, sexually. Frustrated them, until they couldn't take it anymore. And I made them cum like they never have before.

I used their bodies, and much to my enjoyment, they loved it. I could tell by each moan, hiss, and groan that they enjoyed what I was doing to them. The hungry look in their eyes, the desire I saw… it was directed towards me. It made me feel powerful. It made me feel in control. It made me feel wanted.

But, for some reason, it wasn't enough for me. I wanted more. I need more. I craved more.

I stopped holding it off. One day in the office, I decided to research some BDSM places in Seattle finally. I couldn't keep on hiring escorts because to me; they weren't real submissives. They just fit what I was looking for and needed at the time. But, I was one with that shit.

I wanted a real submissive.

After some research, I've finally found some BDSM clubs that were in Seattle that were worth looking at. The Power Exchange. That afternoon I decided to give this place a chance. I reached out to the manager, Leila Williams, via email and the requirements needed before going to the club. Necessary information, preferred name, body pictures while naked, a headshot, and $10,000 cash for my membership that I would have to pay yearly.

That won't put a dent in my wallet.

After a couple of hours, I got an email back from the owner by the name of Madam Lincoln. I was expecting a manager to contact and meet with me, but this works perfectly fine. I let Madam Lincoln know that I will be there at 7 pm sharp.

She replied back quickly with perfect.

xxx xxx

The Power Exchange looked as if it was just a nightclub from the outside, but little did everyone know what actually happened on the inside.

"Rose, I presume." She acknowledges me with her hand out as soon as I walked into the club.

Was she awaiting my arrival?

"Yes. Madam Lincoln, I presume." I raise my hand to shake hers.

"You may call me Elena, darling. I'm the owner and welcome to The Power Exchange."

"I'd rather stick to formalities, if you don't mind, Madam Lincoln."

"Of course. Please follow me," We enter her office, and it's pretty sterile and impersonal. Her walls are a dark red with a black desk. She has no personality in her office unless this is her personality sterile, lifeless, and dull.

"Take a seat and get comfortable, darling. We will just have a quick chat, then a few documents to sign." She points to the chair right in front of her desk, and I took a seat, not knowing I'd be dreading listening to her talk.

The botox late 40's, early 50's known as Madam Lincoln is someone like I've never met before. She didn't have confidence; she was a cocky bitch in her tight leathers. You can tell it all in her body language, and I read people pretty well. But, I must admit, she had curves for someone of that age. It makes me wonder… is her whole body botox?

One thing though, she is too fucking pushy for my taste. She kept a straight gaze, no smile, and 'don't fuck with me' vibe that radiated off of her like bad odor during her whole "welcome" robotic speech. Apparently, she doesn't usually do the welcome and contracts for new members of the club; she lets her manager handle that. But, here she is… in the fucking flesh. I'm a professional woman, and I surely know how to handle business, I think this Madam Elena doesn't, and that's because she is trying too hard to get too cozy with me, first name basis, exposing too much information, and all. What the fuck was up with that? Not only that, her office held a weird presence, it felt like you were being watched in there. She continues to talk about her club, and I just try to look like I'm engaged in the conversation. She mostly explained to me the rules of her club, and she also talked about my body like it's damaged goods. She acted as if I didn't know my own fucking body, it angered me on the inside, but I kept a straight face on the outside.

"Now, here is the contract, you may look it over and if you have any future questions or concerns after signing, do not hesitate to contact me. My contact information is just at the bottom of the last page, and also I can give you my business card." I quickly look over the documents in front of me and sign while handing her an envelope with $10,000 cash inside as she pulls her phone out.

I wouldn't have to deal with her much longer now that I signed this fucking contract!

"Great!" She put her phone down, "welcome to The Power Exchange. Also, I have received some news, and we have someone perfect for you. He has the exact features you are looking for. Gray eyes with brown/copper-ish hair, he is also very familiar with the lifestyle. I think you would enjoy yourself; he has similar hard limits to yours." She says with a hint of excitement in her voice. "Here is a white bracelet to wear when you are roaming around the club. The white bracelet lets others know that you are Dominant or Dominatrix. When you have a submissive, you will provide them with a black bracelet, which will let others know that he or she is owned. Active submissives willing to submit have a red bracelet. Any questions?"

"None at the moment, Madam Lincoln."

"Very well. The submissive I have for you will be ready at 9 pm in private room A. If you go up the stairs and make a left, you go down the long hallway, and there will be a door at the end, and he will be waiting for you inside of the room in the position and clothing you've provided."

"Thank you, Madam Lincoln."

"Enjoy, darling. Remember, don't hesitate to contact me with any questions or concerns."

"Thank you again, Madam Lincoln. I greatly appreciate it." Geez, can this botox bimbo ever shut up? I need to be on my way!

I exit her office and quickly put my white bracelet on. Upon entering the main floor of the club, it's very dark but intimate looking. There is a long cocktail bar to your left with black marble tables and main stage just to the right. Many red leather booths are surrounding the main stage with dimmed lights. The main stage has poles and cages, while they play very sensual music in the background. Many people are indulging and enjoying themselves, and I watch with fascination. I quickly tear my gaze from the main stage after a couple of moments and walk past the main floor to head up the stairs to the room I am supposed to go to.

Before entering the room, I quickly stop by the ladies room and take a look at myself and take a real good look for a few moments before I go in the private room.

xxx xxx

Upon entering the room, I glance around, and it's not as scary as I thought. I honestly was thinking it would look like some torture chamber, but it's actually quite beautiful. I stand there transfixed by my submissive who is kneeling with the clothes I requested and his palms faced up. Beautiful. I notice the St. Andrews cross not too far behind him, and I'm pleased. They set it up the way I wanted it. As I'm walking towards him, I grab the small remote and turn the lights down to low and play some sensual music in the background.

I don't want him to see my body.

As I continue to look around, I have this uneasy feeling. I don't know exactly what it is, but there's something here. I shake my head from my thoughts and focus on what I came here for. I walk towards him enjoying the clicking of my 5-inch heels hitting the ground. I stalk towards him and begin to circle him like I am the predator, and he is my prey.

"I love how you're in the perfect position, pet. Lovely." I purr, he truly is a beautiful fucking sight. "I am your Domme, and inside of the scene, you are to address me as Goddess. While we are outside of the scene and just in case we bump each other out of the parameters of these four walls, you may address me as Rose." I say a little faulty.

I swear something is fucking here. Something that's distracting me. I look around but see nothing out of place. I can't really figure out why I feel this way.

He doesn't answer me for a few moments, and I'm beginning to think he's mute. Why the fuck is he not answering me? Is there something fucking wrong with him?

"Do you understand me, pet?" I say harsher than I intended.

Does he not understand the rules? Is he NOT submissive? Is this club trying to play some sick joke on me?

"I understand, Goddess." My submissives voice breaks me from my thoughts.

That voice… it sounds so familiar.

"What about you? What shall I call you outside of these for walls?"

I take a look around again, and there's something about these four walls.

"Trev." His answer is short and curt.

Trev? Is that short for something?

"Very well. Now pet, I have read over your limits, have you read over mines?"

"Yes, Goddess." Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Damnit, I'm losing my mind! First this uneasy feeling and now his voice.

Focus. I need to focus.

"Good. What are your safewords?"

"Sun and moon." God, his voice sounds like honey.

"Do I need to remind you when to use your safewords?"

"No, Goddess."

"Good. I would like you to close your eyes, and then I would like you to stand."

"Is this your first scene, pet?" I ask, curiously.

"No, Goddess."

I begin to walk to the wall that is full of crops, floggers, canes, and whips. "Why don't you go ahead and tell me an implement you'd like us to play with tonight."

"Yes, Goddess." I hear him say, "a whip, Goddess." Ah, I love that one. I pick a flogger and whip from the wall and begin to stalk towards my submissive. I go behind the St. Andrew's cross and get so close to him, his manly scent evading my nostrils.

"I will use this later on, don't worry," I tell him as I set it down closeby. "You look fucking delicious right now." I purr as I smack his lower back with the flogger I chose, and I hear him take in a sharp breath. Hmm, he must like this.

"Hmmm." I being to stroke his back with the flogger, then smack his mid-back harder than the last, and I hear him groan in pleasure. A couple more hits to his buttocks, thighs, and abs, and I'm immensely pleased by how well he's taking it.

I'm in control, and I love it.

I put the flogger down and grab the whip he chose, then walk far enough in front of him so that he doesn't see my face. "You may look at me," I tell him in the firmest voice I can muster. As soon as he looks up, my breathing hitches. Even with the lights down low, I know exactly who I am staring at. He's the man who I used to know and love all those years ago. Those eyes. Those beautiful gray eyes are glistening even in the low light, and I never thought I'd see them again.

"Rose…" I hear him whisper and it suddenly pisses me off. But, it always brings a sense of confusion… does he know that I'm that Rose or is he just saying it because that's the name I chose to be called within the confinements of these four walls? There's no time to ponder. I can't lose focus. I came here to do one thing and one thing only, and that's to exert my control over my submissive.

"Let's get started, pet." He looks at me without breaking eye contact; then his eyes go downcast.

Our scene wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It was actually everything I wanted, and then some. The way he submitted to me was utterly beautiful; it was the most delicious sight I'd ever seen. His pleasure and his pain, he gave that to me, willingly, and it was empowering. I provided aftercare although, it was something I wasn't planning on doing at first, but feeling his skin under my hand, and tending to him tenderly, it brought me a sense of peace and happiness.

"What made you want to join the lifestyle?" I ask while we sit in the confinement of the four red walls after I got done with the aftercare portion, fully clothed.

"My past." He blurts out, "I don't really like to talk much about it," he hangs his head in shame.

"I can hear the shame in your voice. There is no need to feel ashamed of your past, we all have one." I tell him as he nods, head still bowed down. "We're older now. You can talk to me… Trevor. You can tell me what you want to share. I can tell you're not telling the whole truth. I am here to take care of you and your needs sexually, but I'm also here for you… not just for that. I'm willing to listen and be here for you… as someone, you can be comfortable talking with. You can trust me." He keeps still in his position.

I love his submission, but this is not the time.

"Why are you a submissive and not a dominant?" I asked curiously.

"Well, when I was in foster care I always felt like I needed to please people. I guess that followed me all the way up to adulthood. I also have trust issues, and being able to trust someone implicitly makes it easier for me to trust others." I take a deep breath. "In my workplace, I'm the one in charge and command. Sometimes, I just like to relinquish myself from all of that. Let someone else take control and make decisions for me. It makes me feel free, you know? It's absolutely liberating. I don't have to take make decisions, I don't have to worry what will happen next, and I don't have to be afraid." He tells me, and I get where he is coming from.

He's fucking bowing his head at this like he should be fucking ashamed of this. He has nothing to feel ashamed about. Taking reigns and holding that much responsibility is not easy… for anyone. I hope he knows that.

"When I'm speaking to you, I don't want you to look down at the ground. Do you understand?" I tell him in a nonsense tone and his eyes widen. "Don't ever feel afraid to tell me what or why I would never judge you." He nods again, in silence. "I understand where you are coming from, and trust me when I say that I will never violate your trust. Your trust is paramount to me, and as your Domme, I hold that in the highest regard." He smiles at this, and his smile is… beautiful. It does things to me. "If you'd like, I'd like you to be my submissive and mine only," Why do I feel so fucking possessive over him? After just one night? "I understand your limits, and I'm sure you've read over mines. If you agree, we can continue this."

"I'd love that, Goddess." He tells me with a small smile on his face.

Fuck, he's mine.

We continued our small talk; it was more about his life now. Immediately after that, I left.

Walking out of that private room, I couldn't help but feel like I was being watched. I think I'm going insane, but I know better; I need to trust my gut instincts on this. Even if we were in a private room, I have to consider the possibility that someone was watching us. I shook my head from those dreaded thoughts and exited the club.

He could stay at the club for as long as he wished, I needed to get out of there!

Who knew I'd run into the man who captured my heart all those years ago with a single rose in a BDSM scene. That night, I needed to write in my diary.

Dear Diary,

I saw him again. I never thought I'd ever see him after I left Tennessee all those years ago. I always hoped we'd see each other again, but I never thought that we would in the circumstances that we did.

I now wish I had looked for him after all these years… Maybe things could be different between us.

xxx xxx

After one month of our arrangement, we began to become more comfortable with each other. I trusted him enough. I broke my own rule and had sex with him in a scene, multiple times. It just felt right. We began to have more lovemaking than fucking, and more lovemaking than scenes.

Trying… I was trying for him.

A little more down the road and it became… frustrating. We'd get into the same argument over and over again; I grew frustrated with us making love more than having a scene. But, the night during dinner we argued, and I realized how closed off I really am...

"Rose, babe. Why haven't you told me about your past? About what happened to you? About why you are the way you are?"

"Why, Trevor? I'm trying so hard for us! What more could you want from me?" I yell and throw my fork at the wall across from us. I know I'm acting like a brat, but we've gone through this conversation many times, and I mean many times. I know I haven't divulged into my life, and why I like things a certain way as much as he has, but he can't give me a break now, can he?

"Babe, I'm not trying to upset you. I'm just trying to understand, wanting to understand. I love and care about you so much." He tells me sincerely while grabbing my hand, and I feel the urge to pull away because he's dangerously close to my scars. But, I'm trying, trying for him.

I take in a deep breath and close my eyes before I answer him. Once I open them, I'm looking into his beautiful gray eyes.

When did I become so closed off?

We used to be able to tell each other everything and anything when we were younger, and I'm such a hypocrite. I know he's opened up way more than I have, but by just having him in my presence is proof enough that I've taken strides in opening myself up.

Or so I thought.

"Trevor, you know I love you too. But, you have to understand, it's not easy for me. This," I point between myself and him, "it's not easy for me. Ever since I was thirteen years old, I've always dreamed of being with you. But, things… happened. I wish everything were just that easy, you and me. But, I just haven't lived a life, the life that I wanted. Please understand that." I tell him in a pained voice. "I'm just so, so… angry with myself. Should we have let our 'relationship' go this far? Am I even cut out for this?" I question and begin to feel myself panic. "It was never supposed to be this way! When I saw you in submissive position a couple of months ago at The Power Exchange, it was supposed to be just that. One night. But, I couldn't let you go. And now, look where we are? It was never supposed to be like this! My life was in order, and I had control of it! But, here we are, having, trying vanilla sex more often than not. We play, but it's limited."

I begin to feel my heart beat thump so loud; I think it's going to jump out of my chest. "I'm trying, I'm trying hard for you. But, it's proving difficult for me. I can't Trevor. I can't be like this anymore. I feel myself slipping away. Who I am, what I created, it's slowing slipping away." Just telling him this is like three stabs to the knife, it's that painful and hard. He lets go of my hand, gets up from his seat, and kneels right next to me while cradling my face in his hands.

"Baby, baby, calm down." He tells me in a tone I didn't expect, understanding. "I understand. I'm sorry for trying to push you. I just feel like we're going in circles here. I'll try to be more considerate of you, your feelings, and your past. I don't know much of it, but by the expression on your face, I'm assuming it wasn't at all good. Hell, it might be worse than mine. I'm so sorry baby." He sounds like he's about to cry. "I didn't mean for it to go this far. I had no idea that vanilla sex wasn't… fulfilling for you. I thought that if we tried to back off from the kink in our relationship, it wouldn't be all that bad." He begins to let go of my face and backs away. "If you need the control baby, I'll give it to you. I think ultimately, that's what you're trying to tell me." I look at him, wide-eyed, as he starts to strip out of his clothes, "I know I'm not wearing a blue button up or black slacks, but I do have black underwear." He tells me, and I smirk, as I watch him get into submission position, in the middle of our hotel room.

"I apologize, my Goddess. But, whatever you need… take it from me. My body is yours." He tells me as averts his eyes to the ground and bows his head.

I stand from where I was seated and approach him. "You may look at me," I tell him in my Domme persona. His gray eyes look up at me, and at this moment, I know what exactly what I need. I walk up to him and leave him a soft kiss on the lips. "Thank you, babe." I give him a small smile.

"Now, let's get started, pet."

Now, this is how it's supposed to be.

Controlled.

xxx xxx

A couple of months into our arrangement, it was pure bliss. But then, he proposed a 'real relationship without the kink twenty-four seven,' which made no sense because we were doing a lot of that recently. I was trying for him, but he wanted a title now, that's fine. Although I was very reluctant at first, I decided to give it a go, and it worked out for us.

Normal is what I called it.

Though, who knew being in a seemingly "normal" relationship was proving quite difficult. I enjoyed us the most when we were engaging in a scene. I had strict rules for him. He wasn't allowed to touch any parts of my body besides my intimate parts and face, which made it feel easy for me. While, outside of the scene, I had a much more difficult time. I found it difficult to be intimate with him without doing a scene since there were limits in place. This was our issue. But, we both knew our feelings were more than that with no type of physical contact. I was content with that.

He wanted to be with me even with all of my issues.

I was fully aware of the case he was working on at the time, and he mentioned having to travel out of the state after he got the phone call. So, that morning, he left after we made love. He said that he would only be gone for a week, but a week turned into two, and I was beginning to get worried. After a total of three weeks, the trial was finally done, and he called to say that he would be home for dinner.

I planned a whole special night for us and even had Kate and Ellie go out, so we could have some privacy. I waited and waited because I wanted to let him know we were pregnant when our dessert was served.

Two hours after the time he said he'd arrive…. he never showed up.

I was holding onto hope, thinking he'd show up by now.

Nothing.

About an hour and a half later… still, nothing. I went to bed that night, heartbroken.

He didn't come home.

xxx xxx

The next morning I was woken up by both Kate and Ellie entering my bedroom without my permission. Apparently, the plane that Trevor was on crashed, and it was told that there were no survivors.

The news devastated me. I broke down into endless sobs while screaming hysterically towards Ellie and Kate. After I calmed down, I handed them the positive pregnancy test, and they gasped in shock. Right after, I told them everything from searching about BDSM, The Power Exchange, my encounter with the owner, Madam Lincoln, and my relationship with him. They couldn't believe a word I was saying and sat there in silence after my revelation.

"We love you, Annie and your baby too. Don't ever doubt that. I can see it written all over your face." Ellie tells me and Kate nods while crying. I nod with tears threatening to fall. "We'll help you take care of this baby; you won't ever be alone. Trust us."

"I love you guys too, so much. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for always supporting me. I don't know who or what I'd be without you guys. You mean the world to me, I'd do anything for you." I grabbed hold of their hands and just broke down in sobs until I had no tears left to shed.

After a long conversation about what to do next, I've decided to keep the baby because it's a product of Trevor and I's love. I was bringing an angel into this world. I wouldn't want to subject it to death, or what our parents brought upon us. I wanted to give my baby the world and so do my siblings, and with their support, I could do anything.

As I stayed in my room most of the day, I couldn't shake off the feeling of how shocked I was about my sisters' response to everything I've told them, how we've been through so much together already, and just how understanding they were. I was so glad that I could confide in them, trust them, and open up to them.

That night, I held onto to my stomach in bed, crying not just for me, but for my baby.

Who knew after my first Dom/sub and somewhat "normal" relationship, I would end up pregnant.

I was still utterly devastated.

"Mommy loves you already, little one. No matter what," I whispered down at my stomach before falling asleep… already in love with our baby.

End of flashback

A tear falls as I remember everything that happened between us and the love we shared. It was beautiful, and because of our love, we have two little ones who remind me that life is worth it every day. The hope that I lost is not all gone, and that's because of them. He is living through them.

I decide that it's time that I stop reminiscing about the past and make some breakfast. I walk back into my room and take a look at the clock; it's now 6:30 am. I decided that I should make breakfast since I've got nothing better to do. I head to the kitchen and see Ms. Harper, our housekeeper making a fresh pot of coffee.

"Ms. Harper, I'd like to make breakfast, if you don't mind," I tell her as I open the fridge to grab the ingredients for french toast, and I grab bacon as well.

"No problem, Ms. Kavanagh. This is your home, and the kitchen is at your disposal. I'll go ahead and get started on the other house duties then." She says as she begins to walk towards the living room as I start to cook.

As soon as I started to plate all the food, I hear the giggles of my son and daughter, and the voice of my sisters coming towards the dining room.

"Mommy! Good morning!" My youngest twin daughter, Alex, says excitedly as she runs towards me with her little bunny rabbit clutched under her arm. I crouch down so that I'd be able to catch her in my arms. Her bright powder blue eyes are shining so bright, and my heart swells at the sight. My mini-me.

"Morning baby, how did you sleep?" I say as she jumps into my arms and gives her kisses all over her face. I see Teddy standing there, a couple of feet away, awaiting his turn. While Kate and Ellie are settled at the dining table.

"Good," she grins, "I slept with all my dolls," she tells me as she tries to wiggle out of my arms, and I set her down as she runs to her seat.

I scoop up Teddy and give him the same attention I did Alex, "and how are you my Teddy bear?" I move the hair out of his face so that I can see his gray eyes, which reminds me so much of his father.

"Good mommy! I slept alllll night!" He tells me excitedly, as I walk us to the dining table.

"That's good my Teddy bear, why don't you take a seat," I set him down, and he sits in his assigned seat, as I take my position at the head of the table.

Everyone starts to eat, and I can't help but look at my kids and sisters who choose to share this home with me, and they fill it with so much love and laughter. I take a double look at my two twins, and can't help but think about how much joy, happiness, and love they've brought into our lives.

Theodore James Kavanagh and Alexandria Rose Kavanagh are my pride are joy, and I wouldn't trade them for the world.

My sisters and my kids; they are my life.

Wondering what happened to "Trevor"? We're about to find out next chapter! ;)

Leave me some love! :)

See you all next chapter update! x