Crazy trouble with love part 6
Gaia and Hercules
Series: Hercules
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-Ancient Greece-
"Come on kid! I told you to move your feet!"
"I'm trying!"
"You look like you're trying to dance instead of running from a hydra!"
"Oh come on Phil!" Hercules grunted while running from a sword launching crossbow which nearly hit him in the chest. "I'm trying as hard as I can!"
"Not good enough, I want you to go up against a rabid cerberus with a sword in it's mouths!"
'Like that would ever happen.' He thought while running faster as he put more pressure into each stride.
Crack.
Crack.
Crack.
"Faster kid!"
He went faster while causing the ground to crack. Which caused some vibrations to go off in the earth's crust and allow size three quakes all across the planet, and it only got stronger with each stride made by the hero. Who was unaware of a low groan coming from down below that wasn't Hades.
-Inside the earth-
Deep in a small geode in the planet's center, we find a large bed with green pillows and a few large goatskin blankets inside. Under them was a woman snoring away while the shaking was shaking the bed slightly.
The woman groaned while some long black hair came out from the sheets and exposed some chocolate colored skin. "Ugh…"
The shaking increased while causing the bed to move up and down like crazy.
This caused the woman to fall off the bed and onto the ground while revealing her large ass and almost naked body.
"Ow!" She yelled while opening her blue eyes and got up as her E cup chest moved a little in her amazoness like top made of bearskin. "What in Tartarus?!" she stood up and moved a hand to the ground while the shaking was going on directly above her. "Who dares disturb my slumber? I'm gonna curse the Hades out of them!"
Said god sneezed at that.
She growled before her body gained a dark green color.
(Up above)
Hercules kept on running while a sword nearly took his head off. "Ah! That was a little too close!"
"Expect the unexpected! You're almost there!" Called Phil near the finishing line.
He ran faster and faster before the earth started to shake.
RUMBLE!
CRACK!
"WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER!?" cried out a VERY familiar primordial mother of the planet in unholy rage.
Hercules and Phil went wide eyed while she shook her head of some dirt and glared down at them.
"You! I thought you and the prince were out of my hands?!" She growled. "No matter, I'm going to make you suffer for causing earthquakes that could be felt from the CENTER OF THE PLANET!"
"Oh no." Hercules muttered in horror. "Uh, all mighty Gaia? I didn't mean to wake you up."
"Oh yeah? Well I'm sure that prince didn't either, but I still cursed him!"
"But I was just training to be a hero, I didn't think it was shaking the ground that much."
She frowned before grabbing the hero with her arm. "I don't care, now I shall curse you with a fate worse than death!"
"Uh, what's worse than death?"
She zapped him with a strange energy. "I, Gaia the primordial of the earth and mother of the Titans, shall curse you to sink to the earth and remain there till the gods are gone from living memory!"
"What?!" he and Phil cried out before the goat man ran over.
"M-Miss Gaia, I can get why you'd be so upset, but maybe we can talk this over some nice grass, my treat."
Gaia glared at him before zapping him. "As for you, you shall be turned into a hideous monster until the curse I placed on the boy is broken."
"B-But wait!" spoke Hercules. "What about the golden apples? I could go and get you twice as much as Adonis got you, how about that?"
"No." She frowned as Phil turned into a large goat like monster with large bird wings and a face covered in boils. "I am in NO mood for apples!"
CRACK!
The earth opened up under the hero.
"Now it's time for your eternal punishment boy!" she dropped him down it before going back into the ground while Phil let out a loud caw.
(In the earth)
"AHHHH!" Hercules screamed while dropping down into the earth. He then saw Hades planning something in his throne room and called out. "Hades!"
"Eh?" He turned and saw him falling down right through the underworld. "Wonder brat? Oh great here to ruin one of my plans before they get started?"
"No, turns out I angered Gaia and-"
"You what?!" the god went wide eyed and moved over. "Wait wait wait, hold up there, let me get this straight. You, the big 'hero' above ground, got cursed by the mother earth herself? Wow, you must have done something huge to get on her bad side."
"I just ran around and apparently caused earthquakes." He said while the ground cracked. "And now I'm going to be stuck in the earth until the gods are forgotten from living memory."
"Oh really?" he tapped his chin before smirking. "Wow, sounds like one big problem there, and I'd love to stick around, but I gotta get back to my planning, have a fun time living like a mole Hercy boy."
"What, no!" He screamed as he got sent right back down through the earth. "HADES!"
(Much later)
He screamed while apparently being able to survive the pressure and the lava in the earth's mantle as he crashed into a large geode and landed in a bed. He groaned and rubbed his head before looking down. "A bed?"
"Oh great." Muttered a woman next to him. "You had to land in THIS geode! Just my luck!"
Hercules blinked before looking up and saw a half naked woman glaring at him.
"What? Never saw a primordial before kid?" She frowned in pure hate.
He turned red and jumped back over the bed and fell down. "Ooh! G-Gaia?"
She crossed her arms. "Of course I am. Who else would I be, Demeter in drag?"
He averted his eyes. "S-Sorry about the landing, but...well...it's kinda hard to direct my landing when you're falling."
"Uh huh. Look, I'm still not going to uncurse you, so don't go asking me that." Gaia frowned. "And since you're stuck in my geode, you better keep quiet or I'll throw you out and let you get turned into lava."
"But mighty Gaia, you don't understand. I need to stay above to become a full fledge hero and join my parents on Olympus."
"Now you're the king of the moles. Look boy, I don't care about the gods after they locked up my children and cast Kronos into the sun, so just shut up, keep quiet and be a good hairless monkey." she huffed going under the blankets and turned her back to him.
"But how can I survive? I'll starve down here without food and water, and what about Hades? If I don't stay up there he'll do who knows what to my home."
"Bah!" She frowned. "Let someone else take care of that guy, as for food and water, you're half god right? Don't they just eat air or some crap?"
"Well not necessarily, I mean they enjoy the nectar up there-"
"Then there ya go, just learn to adjust and let me sleep!" She snapped before going to sleep.
Hercules groaned. 'Why are the fates so evil?!'
(Elsewhere)
"Because you are a fool." They said at once.
(With the hero)
He sighed while trying to figure out a way to get out of the geode. He walked around the bed and moved his hands across the walls. 'Maybe I can use my strength and break through until there's a path upwards.'
BONG!
"GAH!" He cried out while feeling like he just hit a very hard substance. He rubbed his hand which turned red and hissed in pain. 'Ok, so plan A is out the window.'
"Keep it down or I'll curse you with exploding blood!" Gaia yelled before going back to sleep.
Hercules looked around while trying to come up with an idea, and failed miserably. 'Ok, maybe if I get some sleep myself I can get an idea. Besides, maybe Phil can tell Icarus and Cassandra what happened and come up with a plan.'
And with that he went to sleep, but unbenounced to him, the time in the earth as a little faster then up above given he was right near a very fast moving core. In essence, he was now sleeping for seven weeks instead of seven hours.
(Much later)
Hercules groaned while slowly waking up, only to see two chocolate orbs in his face.
"Zzzz." Snored Gaia while laying on top of the hero.
He jumped while noting how she had a grip on him and saw she had moved away from her bed.
"Zzzz." She snored while the grip was much stronger than any god or monster he faced off with. "Zzzz, oh no...you're not going to defile my trees prince….girl for you...zzzz."
He gulped and blushed feeling her chest while he tried to carefully slip out. But it didn't work so well as he couldn't move a muscle.
Gaia squeezed tighter while moving closer to him. "Zzzz….no Artemis…don't fuck...the dragons...zzz."
He blushed and tried to keep that image out of his head.
She yawned while moving a little as her chest rested near his face. "Zzzzz….Hades….stop! You shall not….use the cursed goat man as a weapon...he has bad grass and nothing….zzzz."
'Is she talking about Phil? Is Hades really using him as a weapon? I gotta get back up there now!' He thought before getting an idea and yelled a loud battle cry.
She jumped before falling on her ass. "OW! What the Tartarus is going….oh. It's you, what do you want now?!"
"I'm sorry Gaia, but you were...um...on me."
She blinked at that. "Well to be honest, you were warm."
'She's not that shocked?!'
"What? I was married so I know what cuddling is." She deadpanned. "So what do you want? A free pass to the surface so you can gloat that you escaped my wrath? If so then no way buster!"
"But Gaia, my friend Phil is being used by Hades-"
"Hey, how do you know that? I didn't tell you what was going on up there."
"You were...talking in your sleep."
She facepalmed. "Damn it! I knew I should've gagged my mouth shut!"
"Look just let me-"
"No. Way. In. Tartarus." She growled in anger.
"But why not? I swear if you do I'll stop Hades and get you as much of the apples as you want." he pleaded. "I promise I'll be more careful and even cover my feet with pillows if that'll help."
"No." She frowned. "The last person I allowed to get freed nearly killed every animal on earth, damn Orion." She narrowed her eyes at the hero. "And I'm not going to let another one of you mortals escape my wrath, kapeash?"
"But I'm not like him, I just wanna help and save people. I mean, do you know what could happen if Hades becomes the ruler of Olympus?"
"I'm a primordial not a god, plus Demeter has stolen my title as 'mother goddess' since she was born. So why should I even care?"
'Oh that could make anyone mad.' he thought with a gulp. "Because….um….what if Hades isn't satisfied? I mean he's full of himself, arrogant, and wants what he can't have. What if he decides he wants full power over the whole world itself in the palm of his hands?"
"...and?" She said while raising an eyebrow.
"And what if he turns the world into...a...garden of dead flowers and harpies?"
She eye twitched at that. "That little!"
"See? He might not seem like much now, but if we hurry we can keep him from messing with YOUR domain."
She got up and glowed a bright green. "Fine, I'll let you go back up to stop him, but if you run I'll hunt you down and drag you back by your tongue!"
"Uh...sounds fair." He said before getting sent back into the surface.
(Up Above)
"AHHH!" Screamed some Athenians while the cursed Phil was being controlled by a flaming leash.
He cawed and snapped around while Hades watched from his chariot as Pain and Panic were riding on Phil's back and holding onto the leash.
"Oh this is fun!" Hades laughed while grinning. "Can't believe such a creature was just flying by and trying to chase nymphs."
CRASH!
"AHHHH!"
BONK!
The chariot broke apart while causing Hades to fall to the ground. He screamed and wound up landing in a fountain which doused his hair instantly.
"Ow." Groaned a familiar hero. "Gaia really must like dynamic appearances."
"Oh no!" Pain screamed in shock.
"I thought Hades said he was gone for good?" spoke Panic nervously.
"Who said I was?" He said before grabbing the leash. "Now give me back Phil!"
"Wait what?" Hades said before appearing next to him. "This most destructive of monsters is the goat? You gotta be kidding me!"
"Um no, Gaia cursed him too."
"Reee!" called Phil before smacking the two away and stamped off while smashing stands in his way.
"Ah!"
Hercules tried to pull the leash back but found himself getting pulled along with the cursed goat monster.
"Reeee!"
CRASH!
BOOM!
"Ah! Ow! Ow! Slow down Phil!"
"Reeee!" He cawed before crashing into Hades and sent him flying into a wall.
"Oof!" groaned the god with his eyes spinning.
Hercules stood his ground before pulling back on the leash and caused the cursed animal to go flying into him. "Sorry about this Phil!" before swinging his other hand and punched Phil in the cheek.
"Reeeee!" He cawed before getting knocked out.
Pain and Panic gulped before scramming out of the area.
Hades got up and frowned. "Hey!"
Hercules turned and smirked. "What's wrong Hades? Scared that I'm back?"
"No, just caught off guard." He frowned. "After all you've been gone for seven weeks." He then poofed away in a cloud of blue flames.
"Wait, what?" He said in shock before getting pulled back into the earth.
(Later)
CRASH!
"AHHH!"
Plop!
Gaia rolled her eyes at that. "Looks like your jobs done so let me go back to sleep."
Hercules groaned before noticing he landed on the bed and right on the woman's lap. He blushed before jumping off. "W-Wait!"
"What now?! I'm really tired here!"
"Hades, he said I was gone for seven weeks, but that can't be right, it feels like I was just sleeping for seven hours."
She deadpanned. "Look, when you're living near the planets core, which is spinning faster than you can throw a discus, times will go faster then up above."
"Wait what?!"
"It's true you thick headed mortal. So just zip it!"
"B-But-"
"Zip it." She interrupted while grabbing his cheeks. "Or I'll curse you to be a rock or something."
He shut his mouth and paled.
She let go of him before laying down and went to sleep. "Zzzzz."
'Oh gods, I'm going to be stuck here forever and everyone I know will be dead by the time I get out of here!' he thought while gulping. 'What are Icarus and Cassandra even doing right now while I'm stuck?'
What he didn't know was that they were looking for him in Rome and failing miserably.
(Seven months later)
"Zzzzzz." Gaia snored while Hercules looked very tired and a little twitchy.
'This is insane! I need to get out of here!' he thought while running around like crazy and causing a lot of noise.
She grumbled in annoyance. "Be quiet, I just want to sleep."
Hercules didn't acknowledge her while running around like crazy. 'There has to be some weak point I can punch! Or maybe I can make enough noise to get my dad's attention or ANYTHING!'
Gaia growled before getting up and grabbed him before pulling him into her chest. "Shut up or I'll suffocate you!"
"GAH!" he cried out while blushing redder than Aphrodite's dress. 'S-Soft!'
"I swear, you mortals have to work on just relaxing and not get wound up so much." She frowned while Hercules moved his head up. "Now just stop running around and I will give you more attention that doesn't involve me yelling at you every ten hours."
He blushed red. "U-Um I-I wouldn't do that if you just went out and did things with your friends."
Her expression changed to a more depressed one hearing that while letting go of the hero.
"Gaia?"
She looked away. "You mortals are lucky, you can walk around and interact with others. Me on the other hand, can't." She gripped her hands a little. "I can't just leave, even I can't break my own home, all I can do is sleep or make constructs to interact with the world."
"But you're mother Gaia."
"Exactly." she frowned. "What do you think might happen if I try to leave my home or start moving completely?"
"Um the world might be a happier-"
"No! The world will stop moving and everything will fall into the earth! I'm the only thing keeping this planet under control and what do I get? An inescapable prison and NO ONE to talk to!"
He blinked at that. "Can't you make others to keep you happy?"
"If I could do that then WHY am I still here with no servants or friends!?" She said while a small tear went down her cheek. "I'm a prisoner in my own home and no one even bothers to say thanks or give me my own temple as a token of appreciation!"
Hercules flinched at that while feeling a little guilty about not appreciating her. 'Oh man! Now I feel like a total loser!'
"And you are just like the others, thinking I'm just a pathetically evil bitch that curses people for stupid reasons." She snapped. "It's not an easy job buster, let me tell you that."
"Wait I'm not like that!" He said while raising his hands up. "I just didn't know until now, and I promise to tell my parents to get you a temple and everything!"
She frowned. "Likely story."
"I swear!"
Gaia raised an eyebrow at him before wiping a tear away. "If I lift the curse from you, I need two favors on your part."
"What are they?"
"You tell that thunder god to make a temple for me or I'll make sure I send a few lava balls at his front door." She said with a frown.
"And the other?" He asked nervously.
She looked him over before smirking. "You visit me half of the year."
"Oh, really?"
"What did you think I was going to do? Ask you to bed me?" She laughed. "I may have been married but I'm no one night stand kinda girl."
He blushed hearing that and looked away before seeing his body glowing.
"Well better let you go." She said while glowing green. "Just remember, a temple and six months of your time."
(Up above)
Crack!
"AHHH!" He screamed before reappearing in Zeus' temple. He panted and took in the fresh air while coughing before looking around. "I...I'm back. I'm back!" 'I'm back!'
As he looked around, the statue of Zeus blinked and looked down.
"Son? Is that you?" He said while looking worried. "Thank me, we've been looking for you for seven months!"
"Dad! Oh you have no idea how great is it to be back."
"Just what happened to you?"
"Well it's a long story but in short...I'm now going to see Gaia for half a year." He admitted while feeling like he just made a very weird deal with the mother of the earth.
"Wait WHAT?!" Zeus boomed in shock. "Is that the reason you've been gone this whole time?"
He chuckled nervously. "Yeah and um can you give her a temple? Because if you don't um….you're going to get lava balls on your front yard."
"Wait, she told you that?"
"Give her a temple or she'll send lava at you, yes yes she did father." He said while rubbing the back of his head. "And she wants me to visit her-"
"I heard you the first time son, but do you realize she's declaring war if I don't do anything?" Zeus interrupted.
"Well she feels unappreciated considering she's keeping the whole world together. I mean, I know she's the mother of Typhon and the other titans, but she IS the Earth."
"That might be true-"
"Plus she's lonely done there. I mean how would you feel if you were trapped in the middle of a lava pit with a geode as your only home?"
He thought about it while getting a vision of such a scenario. He shivered and rubbed his beard. "Well….I suppose you do make a good point."
"So are you going to give her a temple?"
"I have to consult with the other gods on that matter, but you can visit her half of the year as long as it doesn't affect your intuition or training."
Hercules nodded before going wide eyed. "Phil! He's still cursed!"
"No he isn't." Said a voice from the ground. "He's fine now let me sleep."
Hercules jumped before covering his mouth and nodded.
"Oh and I almost forgot, Zeus tell your idiot brother to NEVER try to take over my domain or I'll curse him with mortality and the inability to eat anything but porcupine quills."
"Um...of course." he whispered.
The voice stopped while everything was super quiet.
"Son, word of advice. When you do visit her, try not to annoy her on a certain month." Zeus whispered to his son. "Trust me, your mother is like that sometimes."
"Huh?" he looked lost. "What do you mean?"
"Take my advice, you'll know in time." He said before becoming a statue again.
"...um what?" 'Father, what was that even for?'