Wow... two weeks! Two weeks I worked on this one chapter, making sure it conveyed the emotions I wanted to get across. It got to a point that before I fell asleep, I would think about how to work out a sentence, or a dialogue, and especially some of the encounters. It was intense, but here it is!

Also, DISCLAIMER: I am REALLY pushing the boundaries of T here. There is nothing graphic, so I think I am safe, but there is a ... situation... or two. So, fair warning as you proceed. I might even upgrade it to 'M,' but I think that might be a little too strong of a rating. Decisions, decisions!

Of course, another round of thank you's to my readers... while the response has been heartwarming, discovering a community of you on Tumblr and connecting outside of fanfiction has been an exciting voyage! For those of you on tumblr, I'd love to follow you! I post TONS of Sailor Moon and randomness, so I promise I'm not a boring follow (the link is in my bio)!

Happy reading!

Love, MU

PS: I apologize for my use of italics in the beginning. Past / present bridge, FYI

The wind was cool on her bare arms, but she didn't care. Her head between her knees, she continued to cry, her heart wrenching in pain with each sob. Just the thought of someone else carrying his baby was crippling.

"Always fucking crying." Lifting her tear-stained face, she looked up to see Diamond hovering above her with a sneer on his face. "And in public. Always fucking crying."

It hurt to look at him. As she watched as his hair blow in the wind while he hovered above her, all she could think about was how those same features lingered over someone else. "Get the hell away from me," she eventually mustered. Unable to save face, she tore her glare away from him.

He laughed as he shook his head. "You're something else, you know that?"

That took her aback, stunning her sniffles away. "I'm something else?" she repeated. "Me?" She stood up slowly, careful not to look directly at him. She knew if she looked at him, it would be a matter of minutes before she would waiver under his influence. "You, you, you cheated on me! How on earth am I the one who is some—"

First came flash of a bright, white light, but the pain was there just as fast. Her eyes began to water, albeit a different reason, yet the source still the same. Serena cupped her cheek as she gaped at him, the shock splashed as quickly as the handprint forming on her cheek.

"Don't fucking hit me again, bitch," he threatened as he stepped in closer. She shuddered; who was this guy standing in front of her? She didn't recognize him at all. The cold stare, the pure hatred seeping out of him.

"You're crazy," she whispered, but it was loud enough for him to react. His hand thrusted forward, his once delicate and tender fingers closing around her neck. She felt the steel beam of the bus stop press against her spine, the only thing keeping her upright. He stepped in closer, his eyes filled with misplaced rage. He pressed his nose against hers, unmoving, as she squirmed underneath his strength.

"You are worthless, you controlling, tiresome, suffocating bitch," he hissed as she began to claw at his arm, her breathing labored as he continued to press her against the beam. "You will never, ever be worth anything. Not to me, not to the world, not to anyone." He released his hand, her body dropping to the ground as she took in a giant gasp for air, coughing wildly as she tried to intake as much oxygen as she could.

As she panted, through blurry eyes she watched as he walked back toward his home, hands in his pocket, as if nothing ever happened. She touched her neck as she bit her lip, the fear paralyzing her tears as she scrambled to her feet.

The bus came shortly thereafter, a beacon of LED lights as the doors opened. Taking a shaky step, she entered, only to hear a gasp as she dropped her coins in the machine.

"Honey, what happened to you?" the driver cried out during her profiling, resulting in Serena to wince.

"Nothing," she replied hoarsely. Dejected, she walked to a vacant seat, ignoring the bus driver's questioning. Placing her forehead against the windowpane, she stared ahead, unfocused as she tried to process the last forty-five minutes. The tears came, but the sobs remained internally, as his words continued to ring in her ears.

Controlling. Suffocating. Pathetic.

Yet, hearing "I'm going to be a dad" was the one that still hurt worst of all.

Such a similar feeling, Serena resolved, as her mind flashed her back to the most terrifying moment in her life. She swallowed hard against his hand, clamped against her mouth while he pressed her up against the bathroom door. "Takin' a shit," he said in a disguised voice to the persistent knocking, her eyes widening in terror when she heard the party nosily walk away. She could hear her name bouncing above the crowd noise, as well as feel the persistent vibration of her phone in her purse.

Her eyes began to water once he pressed his forehead against her, beaded with cool sweat. He stared wildly at her, the once beautiful color now bloodshot and sunken. On the sink she saw the needle and the spoon carelessly forgotten, confirming her fears.

He was high.

"So beautiful," he murmured against her as his fingers fiddled with the hem of her dress. "Even after all this time you're still so fucking hot." Her body convulsed when she felt his kiss against her neck, tears falling as he nipped at the crook. She struggled against him, refusing to be part of any sick charade, only to feel him press his hand harder against her mouth.

"Don't you fucking move," he hissed as she felt her head bounce off the door, fear paralyzing her once again. He lifted his index finger to her, pointing with authority, his stare cold. "You fucking bitch," he groaned. "My kisses no good anymore?" Disgusted, Serena mustered up every bit of hate she could into a challenging stare, but it yielded a different response.

"Oh, I see," he self-deducted, eliciting a sudden slap across her face. "You think the guy you've been fucking is better me, don't ya?!" he growled, the space between the doorframe and Diamond nonexistent as he pressed his full weight into her.

Her eyes squeezed shut, she found herself praying.

Someone, anyone.

I need you.

#

Chad hardly seemed to care when he pulled out in front of a minivan, provoking a horn blaring from the wronged vehicle. "Dude, slow down!" Darien insisted as he grabbed on to the doorframe.

"We need to get there, now," Chad reaffirmed. All Darien knew was that Raye had called to pick her and Serena up. Originally, he had planned to take an Uber home as to not make it awkward. That changed quickly when Chad practically pushed him out of the restaurant, ordering him to get in.

"What the hell is going on? Darien asked, still in the dark.

"Raye said that Serena's ex from high school is there," Chad briefly stated, as if that were to explain it all.

"Okay? How is that a reason to almost get us killed?"

Chad raised an eyebrow at Darien before focusing back on the road. "You know, her high school boyfriend? The one who has issues."

"What are you talking about?"

"Her ex from high school and college?" When he saw his blank stare, Chad cursed. "Shit, how do I know this and not you? Didn't you guys go through the roster?"

"The what?"

"The roster! Who you've dated, slept with, etcetera."

Darien rolled his eyes. "What are we, in college? No, we didn't."

"You're telling me she doesn't know about Nehl?" Silence greeted him. "Shit, Darien, how did you not tell her about Nehl?"

"Because it's not important."

"Bullshit! That relationship single-handedly defined the way that you date women."

Darien pressed his mouth into a thin line. "What's this about her ex? And how the hell do you know about him?"

Chad sighed. "After you guys had your pissing match in front of us that one night, we got to talking about you. It was a good bridge to recover that night, let me tell you. Anyway, Raye told me she dated this douchebag throughout high school and into her University years who was an absolute waste of life. Cheated on her, belittled her, that kind of shit."

"Shit," Darien repeated.

"From what Raye mentioned, too," Chad added, "is that he knocked up some girl. I mean, shit, it's one thing to be cheated on, but to find out like that? Man; I can't imagine how much that had to hurt."

"Yeah," Darien responded slowly. "Damn."

"To top it all off," Chad said with a shake of his head, "when she found out, he got physical."

"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

Chad shook his head. "I guess he tries to reach out to her from time to time. She wants nothing to do with him, but I guess it took a while for her to rebound from that."

"I can understand why," he said.

"Yeah, I'm sure you can," Chad replied knowingly, causing Darien to flinch. Silence replaced conversation as the music on the radio filled the cabin, but his mind wandered back to the dorms of yesteryears. Darien grimaced as he recalled the state of mind he dealt with after he pounded on Nehelania's door. He finally found the words of love he couldn't say to her earlier. It took some digging deep into his core, but once he said them aloud, he was shouting them to whoever would hear.

What shocked him, though, was that she turned him away.

Not just any rejection. She turned him away with tears in her eyes, her bedsheet draping her body, her lover in clear view on the bed.

He walked away while she cried out for him. After that, he vowed he would never, ever fall for someone like that again; only casual encounters. No feelings involved aside for fleeting moments of pleasure.

It had worked thus far, until he met Serena.

Her fiery passion for life, her witty banter, her smart mouth and seductive touch. She poured color into the monotony of his black and white contractual life, the first person who made him feel truly alive.

And he fucked it all up because he couldn't see it. That she truly was the same as him: emotionally scarred. Damaged. Unable to fully compromise and absorb those feelings.

How could he be so oblivious? Her first defense was always to fight, just as it was his. Their arguments were so explosive, like fire and oil, that when they detonated, it was destructible. Yet, they had always found their way back to one another, and in the moments of allowing themselves to care for each other, it was powerful.

He couldn't lose her.

He wouldn't.

The car slowed in front of a small house, a large group of people hanging out on the front stoop with red cups in their hands. "Is this the place?" Darien asked as he looked over the house.

"Yeah," Chad nodded as he pulled up slightly, finding a spot on the side of the road. Once parked, both men got out of the car, Raye approaching them immediately.

"I can't find her," she stressed tearfully, the usually reserved woman doused in fear. "She's not answering her cell and she's nowhere to be found. Sapphire's on the hunt, too, but Chad, I'm scared."

Darien was quick to move, his legs crossing in large strides as he made his way into the house. He didn't care if they weren't speaking, or if when found she didn't want to see him. He just needed to know she was okay.

He looked upstairs immediately, three closed doors catching his eye. He went to ascend the stairwell, throwing open the first door he approached without a care. He was met with an unmade bed, yet no parties. Next, he went to the middle door, twisting at what was a locked doorknob. He knocked on the door and received a comment about some guy taking a shit, his nose wrinkling at the informality of the expression. Lastly he threw open the final door, the result the same.

#

"You think," he seethed as he cupped her chin, "that because you write in a magazine you're better than me?" She stretched her neck as high as she could, if only to be a mere millimeters away from his hot, putrid breath. "Remember how good I used to make you feel?" he groaned into her ear. "How I used to take my fingers and-"

She drowned his voice out, ignoring whatever disgusting sentence he was trying to mutter. At this point, she didn't care any longer. If she didn't at least attempt to defend herself, he wouldn't stop. He would put her hands on her, everywhere.

If she didn't try, she would never forgive herself.

She waited until she found the right opportunity, feel himself shift some amount of weight off her.

His fingers moved onto her thigh, sliding up her leg slowly as he pulled her chin closer to his lips. She tightened her jaw, hoping the resistance would make the move a more difficult task. He removed his hand from her chin and slammed it against the door behind her, about to say, yell, or do something next.

Now.

"No!" she cried as she drove her knee into his balls. He stumbled back a few steps before topping onto the floor, grabbing at his crotch in pain. Knowing better than to watch, she turned around, twisted the lock and swung the door open. She could hear him groaning in the bathroom, but she focused on getting to the stairwell as quick as her legs would go. Holding on to the rail for support, she turned and began to run down the stairs.

Blue met blue.

The fighting, the words, the anger, the sorrow; none of it mattered. "Darien," she cried out as she ran into his chest, burrowing herself in his familiar scent as he wrapped his arm around her. As he held on to her, she could feel his muscles flex as if to protectively keep her against his frame.

How he was here, or how he knew she was in trouble, she would find out later.

She buried deeper into his chest as he stroked her hair, the tears staining his white shirt as she cried.

Just minutes ago, she had never felt so terrified.

Now, never had she felt so safe.

#

Standing outside the house, Serena finished her recall of the transpiring events to the officer. She was reluctant to press charges, but everyone was beyond furious. Even Sapphire, once Diamond's biggest supporter, was disgusted in him. In fact, he needed to be restrained when he confronted Diamond in the bathroom.

In fact, it had taken multiple different people to restrain the fury flying between Raye, Darien, and Sapphire; especially Raye, her heel digging in his chest, pressing him against the floor as she spewed colorful statements full of angst and hate.

Between the physical altercation, attempted sexual assault, drug paraphernalia, and multiple witness statements, police had more than enough to arrest Diamond. There would be more discussions the next day, but for now, she was safe.

Once the officer moved on from her, she looked back over to her group of friends over by the house, talking amongst themselves. Raye's fingers were stretched out, and Serena could practically hear Raye reassure everyone she was calm. Chad was rubbing at her shoulders, trying to reduce her stress and simultaneously calm her down. Sapphire was shaking his head at the whole thing, his hand cupping his chin as he watched friends and acquaintances understandably disperse from his house.

And Darien. He stood in the group, his mouth pressed firmly as he remained stoic. His hands tucked deep in his pocket, she could tell he was out of place, yet not sure if he should stay or leave.

As she thanked the officer, who was scribbling the last of their notes before walking away, she made her way back over to the group.

"You ready to head home?" Raye asked Serena, who nodded vigorously.

"Yeah," Serena responded. Turning towards Sapphire, she gave a sympathetic smile. "I'm sorry about your party."

Sapphire shook his head. "Don't be. I'm so, so sorry about Diamond showing up like that. I feel terrible."

Serena shook her head. "Don't be, you couldn't have known."

Sapphire smiled. "I'm glad you're okay."

Serena nodded and smiled reassuringly before turning back towards Raye and Chad. "Can you drop me off?"

"Of course," Chad immediately answered. "Darien, are you…?" he trailed, waiting for him to advise on his mode of transportation home.

"I'll grab an Uber. Get Serena home," Darien instructed as he reached for his phone, only to be interrupted by Serena abating his plan.

"Don't be ridiculous, you don't need to Uber," Serena insisted. She smiled when she watched Darien nod and put his phone away. The group made their way over to Chad's SUV and piled in, Serena sitting behind Chad, Darien behind Raye.

It was a quiet ride, aside from Chad announcing that he would take Darien home first, as he was closest. She stared out the window, enjoying the cool temperature of the glass while her mind raced.

She shifted her eyes over to Darien, who was looking out his window as well. The space between them, both physically and emotionally, weighed more on her mind than what just happened. She was a strong woman; she knew she could process and move on from what just happened to her. Serena knew her support system, her best friends, would be there in an instant to help her work through anything that should she find herself struggling to absorb.

She didn't just want her friends, though.

She wanted, needed, him.

Her heart raced as she pulled her phone out of her pocket, her thumb hovered over the neon green icon. With a quick tab of her fingers, she let out the breath she was holding as she placed the phone back in her lap. Her ears perked up when she heard the vibration on the other side of the bench, her peripherals watching as he looked at his phone screen.

Can I come back with you tonight?

She smiled bashfully when she felt his hand hover over hers in response.

#

It never ceased to amaze Serena how a hot shower could cure almost everything, especially when under one that spouted out like a waterfall. She sighed as she turned off the nob, reaching for and wrapping the fluffy towel around her. Darien's bathroom was pretty much the size of her apartment, but it was worth every square footage, filled with luxurious amenities and fixtures. She never, ever felt bad about taking advantage of it. Her hand itched to use the steam, but refused, her mind weighed down with another matter.

Drying herself off, she slipped on Darien's shorts and t-shirt before exiting the room. She briefly shivered as she left the warm confines of the bathroom, but her heart warmed her immediately. Darien was in the kitchen, a red kettle in hand, pouring two cups of what looked like hot water. A tender side she had never seen before, she leaned against the doorframe of the kitchen, watching as he methodically dipped a tea diffuser in each cup before covering them with fitted lids.

He would have tea diffusers instead of teabags, she mused internally. He must have felt eyes on him, because he suddenly turned around.

"Is peppermint okay? I thought it would be good to help you relax." She nodded. He picked them up, passing one cup and saucer off to her, before proceeding into the living room. Darien sat in the chair whereas she sat opposite of him on the loveseat, the distance between them still prevalent.

The tea sat on the table, steeping as the two of them sat silently. She wanted to tell him, and knew what she wanted to say, but she couldn't find the introduction. After all, how to even announce such a subject? Hey, I'm actually a pretty fucked up person, nice to truly show you?

"I'm sorry." Her head lifted. His stormy blue eyes focused on her, holding eye contact, sincerity radiating out of the two-syllable word. "I never, ever meant to say something so cruel to you. Especially something that isn't true." He uncrossed his legs before leaning his torso in. "You are a gifted, talented writer, and I'm sorry if I made you feel anything less than that."

Goosebumps. Not quite chills, but it was a feeling she did not get often. Normally she was the one apologizing for her buffoonery.

A smile twitched at the corner of her lips. "Thank you," she murmured.

Darien continued to watch her. She could tell he was struggling if he needed to say more, or let it rest. She was about to open her mouth, try and explain why she was so upset that night of her birthday, only to surprise her with a confession of his own.

"Nehelania," he started. Serena's ears snapped to attention, the crude, catty woman's image resurfacing in his mind. "I know I told you that she was my ex-girlfriend from college." Serena watched Darien's facial expressions, as if he was struggling to get the words out. "It's a lot more," he paused, "complicated, than that."

"Complicated?" Serena repeated quietly. He nodded.

"I didn't date in high school. I focused on my studies. I was determined to get into a good University. But when I met Nehl, it was… intense. I didn't know how to handle it." He paused again, as if he was searching for the right words.

"She told me that she loved me. I panicked. I saw expectations and commitments instead of feelings and desires. Instead of reciprocating, I reacted in anger. And because of that anger, I drove her to sleep with my best friend."

"What?" Serena breathed, her eyes wide with surprise.

"I knew my buddy Asanuma was in to her, but I didn't think anything would happen. I was stupid, blind to what was happening in front of me. He said all the things that I didn't. Or couldn't, I guess. When I found them in bed together, I swore off dating."

"Oh, Darien," Serena sadly replied. He shook his head.

"It worked in a sense that I got to where I wanted to be in my career. But, after I met you, those rules I lived by, I didn't want to abide by them anymore. I don't want to anymore."

Her heart both leapt and ached, overflowing with emotion. She could feel her legs wanting to power off the couch and dive into his arms, but she willed herself to stay seated.

She had confessing of her own to do first.

It was surprisingly easy, Serena thought to herself, as the words flooded out of her. About Diamond, the way he treated her, how he hurt her. She explained how the emotional abuse and the shocking revelations of infidelity and physicality impeded so many of her relationships. He listened and nodded along, reluctant not to inquire further than she was willing to explain.

The anger dissolved with each sentence, anger she didn't even know she was holding on to. A calm coursed through her when she reached the end of her admission.

She exhaled.

All those years, she reflected, of holding on to the resentment she felt, it took one person to knock down those barriers.

Tears sprung to her eyes. "It wasn't until I thought I lost you," she confessed softly, "that I realized how much hatred I still carried. How untrusting I was, how quick I was to assume the worst." She feverishly wiped at her eyes before she made eye contact with him.

"I'm sorry, too."

The corners of his lips curled into a smile that made her heart burst. One so sweet, she could feel honey trickle through her veins.

They found reconciliation.

There wasn't more that needed to be said, they mutually agreed as they continued to look into each other's eyes. Instead, he stood up while extending his hand out to her. She shyly placed it in his, her heart racing as he led her into his bedroom.

Lying down in the bed, he took her into his arms. The only noise between them their steady breathing as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her close under the covers. Her eyelids grew heavy under the rhythmic sound of his heartbeat, the warmth of his body allowing the sleepiness to overtake her system.

Before she fell asleep, she heard it. It was barely a whisper, an expression more for him than it was to her.

A phrase she had missed weeks before, but one that meant so much.

Don't think; just feel.