Chapter 4

Intellectually, Alice had always known that Tommy had had other women over the years. How could he not? It was expected of a man in his line of work, particularly one without a wife, and at the beginning it had scarcely touched her. She was wrapped up in caring for their child, running the boarding house, and yes, totally confident of Tommy's devotion. The other women were business, she reasoned; she was love.

When Eloise had first entered his life Alice had taken no more notice than usual. At first, wilful blindness and a certain distance allowed her to believe that nothing had changed. Then, for only the third time since their relationship had begun, Tommy had cancelled their weekend trip to 'visit her mother'. But, where before he had told her himself, laying out the tricky business issues which had forced him to focus elsewhere and seeking her input, on this occasion it was Polly who had brought the message. Polly had given her no reason for his absence but Alice could feel the anger and disapproval coming off her in waves.

She was getting a strange sensation from the men who passed through her care too. They were never openly disrespectful about Tommy but on occasions she had walked in on muttered conversations about 'the bitch' and about how he was being led by his cock rather than reason. Alice felt a growing sense of unease.

Then he cancelled their upcoming trip to Whitby. This time he told her in person.

The moment he stepped in to her office she knew something was wrong. He looked depressed and exhausted and there was a deep gouge across one of his cheeks. Not making the slightest move to touch her he flung himself heavily into the chair facing her. Tensing slightly, Alice set aside her accounts.

'What's going on Tommy love?' she said with concern.

'I can't go to Whitby,' he said coldly, staring stonily in to the middle distance.

'But why?' she asked unhappily.

'I'm going to Paris. I'll be gone for a few weeks.'

Alice was confused. As far as she was aware there were no Shelby interests in France and it was hardly a country that held fond memories for him. 'Are you looking to expand?' she asked.

'It's not business', he ground out.

'Well why don't I come with you?' she asked, a little desperately. 'We can spend some time together. I haven't been abroad since the war.'

Looking at her directly for the first time, he said 'I think it would be considered inappropriate to take my mistress on my honeymoon' He paused. 'I won't be calling on you again, Alice. I thought you deserved to hear it from me directly.'

'You're getting married?' she asked, her face a mask of confusion. 'Who to? What do you mean you won't be calling again?'

Levering himself up from chair he looked down at her emotionlessly. 'I have a duty to Eloise. We can't meet again'. At that he walked briskly from the room leaving Alice frozen in her seat. It was only once he was well away from the house that Tommy allowed himself a moment of grief. Nevertheless it had to be done. He was tainted now and any further contact between them could only hurt her.

Alice found it hard to remember that leaving Tommy free to marry had been her idea all along. What had she been thinking! Devastated she threw herself in to her work and there was certainly plenty of it. Over the first few months of Tommy's marriage the numbers of wounded men coming through her doors multiplied alarmingly and the seriousness of their hurts increased as well. Sometimes she was hard pressed to even keep them alive let alone restore them to full health.

After the second death Alice realised that this was not the normal ebb and flow of business. There was something seriously amiss and it couldn't go on. Decide, she put on her smartest dress, painted her face, and carefully curled her hair. She needed all the confidence that these preparations could give her. Driving a pin fiercely through her hat, wincing as it scratched her scalp, she squared her shoulders and set off to do battle with the man she loved.

Without announcing herself Alice stormed in to Tommy's study. Then she stopped, confused. For a moment she did not recognise the man sprawled in Tommy's chair. Then with growing horror she took in the puffy red eyes, heavy jowls, and the general air of dissipation. What the hell had happened to him in the three months since his marriage?

'What do you want Alice?' he slurred, looking confused. Then he brightened and took another massive slug of whiskey. 'What do you think, Eloise – should we ask her to stay and play?' Surprised Alice looked behind her to where Eloise was lying quietly lounging on a couch half hidden behind the open door.

'Christ no,' Eloise sneered looking down her long nose at Alice. 'You haven't a clue where she's been. At least we know that the maids are clean.' She smoothed her hand on the velvet upholstery as if trying to wipe Alice's taint from her delicate pale skin. 'Is this the one whose husband was so desperate to get away from her that he ran off to get killed?' She asked cruelly. Stunned in to silence Alice could only stare at her.

Standing up Eloise stalked toward Alice. Then, leaning in until she was uncomfortably close, she hissed at her, 'I'll have no common sluts in my house even if you are the mother of my husband's bastard.'

As if she had been slapped Alice rounded on Tommy. 'You told her? How could you tell her? You promised!' Her throat clenched in fear. 'You know that it's the only sure way to keep Jack safe.'

For a moment she saw a glimpse of the old Tommy staring back at her but it only lasted for a second. Then he shrugged carelessly. 'She's my wife. She deserved to know.' He paused. 'Don't come back to Arrow House again, Alice. If I want you I'll let you know. You can deal with Polly from now on.'

In shock, Alice could only nod her acquiescence. She left the room stiff backed. She made it as far as the kitchens before the tears came.