"That boy's got a crush on you," Remus said, smiling at Hermione on their way down to the Great Hall.

He was referring to Alex, who had not so casually strolled past them moments before, grinning shyly at her and waving hello. Their paths had crossed a suspicious number of times since they'd first met.

"He does not," Hermione said, smiling as well. "He's just grateful I helped him out the other day."

"He's grateful," Sirius interjected as he joined them, "that the person who helped him out happened to be a gorgeous seventh-year girl."

Hermione blinked. Did Sirius Black just call her gorgeous?

"You'd better watch out, Jean," Sirius continued. "If you're not careful, he might catch you beneath some mistletoe one of these days. That is, if I haven't caught you first."

Hermione knew Sirius had no real interest in her and that his flirting should not be taken seriously, yet she still found it hard to hold his gaze sometimes when he smirked at her the way he was doing right now. And so she looked away from him, her eyes landing on Remus, who was watching her and Sirius with a peculiar expression. Fortunately for her, he swiftly changed the subject.

The three of them walked on to the Great Hall, Hermione cautious of all the mistletoe that had been hanging around the castle since December had arrived, but it was more because of Remus than because of what Sirius had just said that she was so wary.

She and Remus had experienced a rather awkward moment between them the day all the mistletoe had appeared. They'd been talking right outside the library when a cheery classmate passing by had called out to them and pointed upwards. They'd both looked up to find that they were standing not quite beneath a sprig of mistletoe but dangerously close. Although they'd both been haste to move away, Remus had reacted faster than she had, practically jumping away from her and proving for the second time he had no interest at all in kissing her. Hermione couldn't help but feel the sting of this confirmation that he didn't like her, and she'd been careful ever since not to put herself in a position like that again. She was becoming an expert at navigating around all the mistletoe in the castle.

In the Great Hall, twelve beautifully decorated Christmas trees stood tall and festive as Hermione, Remus, and Sirius sat at the Gryffindor table for lunch. Remus, however, was only with them for a short while. He needed to speak with a professor before their next class about an assignment he'd missed, so he finished his meal quickly, his expression peculiar and difficult to read again when his gaze swept over her and Sirius before he headed off and left them alone together.

Hermione dismissed her curiosity about Remus's expression for the time being and decided to take advantage of this time alone with Sirius to speak with him about something she found very interesting. Over the past couple of weeks, she'd noticed the notorious ladies' man's normally wandering eyes narrowing in upon one girl in particular. As a matter of fact, he was furtively watching this girl right now. Hermione found it atypical that Sirius, who had a proclivity for casually flirting with members of the opposite sex, was abstaining from engaging in any form of flirting with this girl who had apparently caught his fancy.

"Sirius," Hermione said, causing him to tear his gaze away from where Marcia was sitting at the end of the table.

"What?"

"Now that I have you alone and drinking pumpkin juice," she said to him very seriously, "I'm going to tell you something very personal."

"What?" he repeated.

"It's about you."

Sirius frowned at her for a moment, then he gave a roguish grin, no doubt remembering that was how he'd initiated their conversation several weeks ago when he'd carried her to the Hospital Wing after the Quidditch mishap. "What is it?"

"You like Marcia," Hermione told him, stating it like fact.

Sirius simply stared at her, his eyes revealing nothing, his lips still slightly curved in amusement.

"I can tell her for you if you'd like," Hermione offered pleasantly.

Sirius laughed, then merely said, "I'd rather you didn't."

"Because you fancy her or because you don't?"

"I don't know."

"How can you not know?"

Sirius shrugged, then asked, "Are she and Christopher together now?"

"Not officially, but they've been talking a lot lately."

"Then I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell her."

"You don't want me to tell her that you don't know whether you like her or not?" Hermione clarified.

"Yeah."

For the first time, she thought she saw a hint of vulnerability in his eyes. "Fine."

Hermione wouldn't tell anyone just yet, but she observed Sirius curiously during their next class together, specifically his interactions with Marcia. Was she right about him fancying her? And if he was interested in her, then why wasn't he pursuing her? She wondered if he would kiss Marcia if ever he found himself with her beneath the mistletoe. Or would he step away from the Quidditch Chaser as Remus had stepped away from her? Hermione had a feeling Sirius would do the same as his friend, though she didn't quite understand the reason why.

She had yet to come to an understanding later that day when she was walking through the castle on her way to meet Lily and decided to take the shortcut behind the tapestry. Just as she reached the wall hanging that concealed the hidden passageway, Hermione heard Sirius speaking from somewhere behind it. A moment later, she heard a second familiar voice.

"If you fancy her," Remus said, "why don't you just ask her out already?"

"What makes you think I fancy her?" Sirius asked.

"You mention her all the time."

Were they talking about Marcia? Intrigued, Hermione stood there by the tapestry listening to the boys' conversation on the other side.

"Do I?"

"And you flirt with her a lot," Remus added.

Hermione frowned. Maybe they weren't talking about Marcia.

"I flirt with a lot of girls," Sirius replied.

"But you've taken a special interest in her," Remus pressed.

"It's fun to make her blush. And she's cute. And smart."

"I didn't think she was your type."

Hermione wondered who they were talking about…

"Maybe she's my new type," Sirius said. "You know what? Maybe I will ask her out." A long pause. "Would that bother you?"

"Why would that bother me?" Remus asked, sounding vexed.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because you're in love with her."

Hermione's eyes widened. Who were they talking about?

"Don't even try denying it," Sirius said before Remus could respond. "We've been friends for six years. I know you, Remus. I knew you'd fallen for Jean since day one."

Hermione gasped and clapped her hands over her mouth — they were talking about her!

"And I knew you wouldn't do a thing about it," Sirius continued. "Not without a push, anyway. That's why I flirt with her. I thought I could pressure you into making a move before I did, or at least get some type of reaction out of you. Seeing as you look like you want to slug me right now, I think I've finally succeeded."

Silence. Hermione's heart raced as she waited for Remus to say something.

"Well, that was stupid of you," he spoke finally, a quiet edge in his voice. "You should have figured she'd fall for you, like nearly every other girl at this school."

"Jean isn't even the slightest bit interested in me and I think you know that," Sirius argued.

Remus said something Hermione couldn't hear and she leaned in closer to the tapestry.

"She likes you, Remus," Sirius insisted. "It's clear as day to anyone who's ever seen the two of you together. You must have realized it too."

Another silence. Hermione was feeling oddly exhilarated.

"So?" Sirius prompted.

"So what?"

"When are you going to ask her out?"

"I'm not."

Something inside Hermione deflated.

"Why not?" Sirius demanded.

"You know why," Remus said.

Hermione didn't. She wanted an explanation, but—

"What are you doing?"

Hermione nearly jumped out of her skin at the sound of the voice behind her. She spun around.

"Are you—?" Lily began, but Hermione urgently pressed a finger to her lips and the redhead fell silent.

After a longing glance at the tapestry, Hermione forced herself to walk away from it. She pulled Lily along with her down the corridor.

"Were you eavesdropping on somebody?" Lily asked, amused.

"Um…yeah," Hermione admitted guiltily.

"Spill, Jean. What's the latest gossip?"

"I'm not sure," she replied. "I didn't get to hear everything."

Which left her feeling extremely annoyed that evening and frustrated that night as she lay in bed.

Did Remus have feelings for her or not? He hadn't denied Sirius's assertion that he had fallen for her, but nothing Remus had said had been an outright confirmation either. He had, however, made it clear that he was resolved not to ask her out. But why? For the same reason he hadn't wanted to kiss her beneath the mistletoe or during that Truth or Dare game? Because he didn't like her in that way? But then why did it seem he was jealous of Sirius flirting with her?

She didn't know the answers to any of these questions, but she did know for certain she'd be a nervous wreck around Remus the next day.

And so she was. Now that he knew, thanks to Sirius, that she fancied him, how could she not be self-conscious around him? She didn't know how to act. Remus, on the other hand, was behaving no differently than normal towards her. Neither was Sirius. In fact, nothing they said or did even suggested they'd had that conversation about her behind the tapestry. It might never have happened.

By dinnertime, Hermione had nearly convinced herself that it never had happened, but then Remus asked her, "Are you going to Slughorn's Christmas party on Saturday?" and her heart skipped a beat. Was he about to ask her to go with him? But he'd said he wasn't going to ask her out…

"I'm not sure," she told him hesitantly. "Lily's been trying to convince me to go. Are you going?"

Remus shook his head. "I can't. I have detention."

"Oh." Hermione, remembering how he'd gotten into trouble for defending her from the Slytherins, and feeling guilty about it, said, "I don't think I'll go either, actually."

"You have to go, Jean," Lily said. "You already have a dress and everything."

It was true. Hermione had been surprised to find a beautiful dress amongst the clothing that Dumbledore had provided her when she'd first arrived to this time. She supposed it was for occasions like this.

"Come on, it'll be fun," Lily said. "And you never know who you'll meet."

Hermione looked at Remus.

"You should go. I hear David Bowie is going to make an appearance," he said, his eyes alight with humor.

Hermione and Lily laughed. The rumors going around about famous people who might be attending the party had really gotten out of control. Though the rock star was definitely a Muggle, his name had been thrown around as a possibility.

"Hey, it could happen," Lily said. "If he knew about wizards and magic and Hogwarts, I think he would definitely want to come."

"You wouldn't want to miss that, would you?" Remus asked Hermione.

"Absolutely not. Maybe I will go," she acquiesced. "Just in case Bowie does show up."

"Ready, Jean?" Lily asked as Hermione was making a final adjustment to her simple but elegant updo.

"Ready," Hermione said, giving up on the curl that refused to cooperate.

"Great. Let's go."

Saturday evening had arrived, as well as the time for Slughorn's Christmas party, and the two girls left their dorm and headed toward their Potions professor's office, Lily looking much more excited than Hermione felt.

"Is James meeting you there?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah, but he told me he might—"

Lily was cut off by the squeal that escaped Hermione as they rounded a corner and she crashed straight into Remus.

"Sorry, I—"

Remus broke off when he saw who he'd run into and took in Hermione's appearance, his gaze lingering on her shimmering silver gown. Hermione's face suddenly felt very warm.

"You look… You look really nice," he said. "Both of you," he added, turning his gaze toward Lily.

Lily smiled. "Thanks. We thought we should dress up a little for Bowie. It's too bad you can't come with us, Remus."

"Yeah," he agreed, looking much more disappointed about it now than he had the last time they'd talked about it.

He wished them a good time and continued on his way to detention, Hermione staring after him for a few moments, feeling guilty again. It was completely unfair that he'd gotten into trouble just for defending her and wasn't allowed to go to the party tonight. She really wished he could come with them. He still owed her a dance from Halloween.

Hermione walked with Lily the remainder of the way to Slughorn's office, feeling less and less enthused about the Remus-less party with every step. The sound of laughter and chatter and music grew louder as they approached the Potions professor's door, but these sounds that promised enjoyment and were generally thought of as inviting were rather unappealing to Hermione at the moment. She was too distracted to participate in this kind of social gathering tonight.

Lily was halfway through Slughorn's door when she noticed Hermione wasn't following her.

"What's up?" she asked her. "Aren't you going to come in?"

Hermione shook her head. "I think I'm going to take a walk instead."

Concern crossed Lily's features. "Is everything all right?"

"Yeah. I'm just not sure I'm up for a party anymore. I've got too much on my mind. But you go on. Find James. Have fun."

"Are you sure you're okay, Jean?"

"I'm fine. I promise."

Lily still appeared hesitant, but she said, "Well, alright. I'll see you later" and went through the door to join the party.

Hermione strolled off in the opposite direction. Without a destination in mind, she wandered through the castle corridors for a while before eventually finding herself at the top of the Astronomy Tower. It was no wonder her subconscious had led her here where she knew Remus sometimes went to be alone with his thoughts. She felt as he did that this was the perfect place to think.

She sat down with her back against the tower wall, exactly where he'd been sitting on the occasion she'd seen him up here, and watched the night settle around her. The sky was stunningly clear. So many stars pinpricked the black canvas above her. They were impossible for her to count and impossible for her to understand.

Hermione shivered. Her coat was no match for the freezing weather, but she didn't want to go back inside yet. Instead she pulled out her wand to conjure some bluebell flames and arranged them around herself. Lying in the center of the circle of warm, pleasant fire, she gazed up at the sky and returned to her thoughts of Remus.

Were Lily and Sirius right about him? Did he have feelings for her? She didn't know why she cared so much to find out the answer. It didn't really matter. She couldn't be with him either way. If she'd belonged in this time, then maybe they could… but she didn't belong in this time. She belonged twenty years in the future where the circumstances were completely different and a romantic relationship between them would be entirely inappropriate. But then why was she here? She had a strong feeling that the reason had something to do with Remus, but what was it? What was she supposed to learn? And what was she supposed to do with that knowledge?

Hermione didn't know how long she'd been lying there, lost in her wandering thoughts and unanswered questions, when he came.

"You look like you're doing some serious thinking."

Hermione sat up to see Remus standing by the door. "I am."

"Care to share?" he asked, stepping past the bluebell flames to sit next to her.

"Do you believe in fate, Remus?"

He pondered the question for a few moments before answering, "I'm not sure."

"Neither am I," Hermione said. "I've been looking up at these stars and wondering, is everything written up there? Our future? Our choices? Are the ideas of fate and free will contradictory or are they actually the same? I mean, I've seen a lot and I've definitely had to reconsider some of my old modes of thinking. There are real prophecies out there, so does that mean that our lives are dictated by them and our futures are already planned out for us? Or do these predictions just offer us glimpses of our future choices, decisions we'll make for ourselves because of who we are in that point in time? Do our choices dictate our fate? Does fate just depict our choices?

"And time," Hermione continued, rising to her feet and beginning to pace. "I don't understand. For instance, how is time travel even possible? Is time linear or is it more complex than that? Changing the past changes the future, but what if you're living in the past? Doesn't that make the past actually the present? So any choice you make in the present doesn't really change the future because the future hasn't come yet. But what if the future has come but you're sent to the past which is now the present and— hey, where did the future go? Did it just disappear or does it still exist?

"Oh!" she exclaimed suddenly, momentarily pausing her stride as a new thought struck her. "What if the past, present, and future are all happening simultaneously and time is just an illusion? What if time is undefined? What if the timeline of events in our lives, in our universe, is ever evolving and reacting to our choices and actions? What if there are an infinite number of alternate futures continuously playing out and being altered? Or do you think there are alternate dimensions or different planes of existence where all possible futures can transpire at the same time? Or maybe—"

Hermione broke off when she caught sight of the expression on Remus's face. He was standing now too, watching her with a faint frown, and she realized she'd been madly pacing about and stopped immediately.

"I'm sorry. I didn't meant to ramble," she said. "I just got caught up in all these thoughts and, well, it's all so unfathomable! Time and choices and fate…it's so complicated. Some things just don't make sense in my mind, but other things that shouldn't make sense are perfectly clear. Do you think some things are just meant to be? Do you think some things are just meant to happen, whatever the time or dimension? And if they don't happen or aren't happening, does the universe try to make it — I'm so sorry. I'm rambling again. I'll stop."

"Wow," Remus said after a short silence. "You really were doing some serious thinking."

They stood there for a while, quietly contemplating the night sky and their own musings. Hermione's thoughts were still running wild, unable to be quelled, when Remus broke the silence.

"I don't know how our choices and fate correlate," he said, "and I don't know anything about alternate dimensions or any of the infinite number of possible futures. And maybe we're not supposed to know anything about that. Maybe we shouldn't dwell so much on what we don't know and focus on what we do. We're in this dimension and in this time and in this space. The only reality we know is the one we're living in at this moment. The only time we know, the only time we're given to actively experience is right now, the present. We should do what we feel is right with the time we are given. That way we can live with whatever comes next. No regrets."

"Do what we feel is right with the time we are given…" Hermione repeated. Then she was pacing once more, reflecting upon this new idea and how it related to her, a fresh tide of thoughts and possibilities washing over her.

"Jean," Remus called softly, grasping her wrist to keep her from pacing.

Hermione turned to face him, about to begin another long-winded dialogue about her new questions and musings, but the words died in her throat. Something in the way Remus was gazing at her made her go completely still. Though physically restless a moment before, she was motionless now. Even her mind became quiet, all rumination ceasing. She could scarcely breathe. Everything had slowed down, everything except for her heart which had accelerated, beating much too quickly for someone standing so still.

Remus released her wrist to sweep back a stray strand of her hair. Then he softly touched his hand to the side of her face, his eyes looking intently into hers.

"No regrets," he said, just above a whisper.

Hermione's heart pounded away anxiously. She knew what was coming next and felt helpless to prevent it, helpless and unwilling because in this very moment, in this time and in this space, this is what she really wanted. Being on the verge of a kiss with Remus, under a star-strewn night sky, with the warmth and the light of the bluebell flames dancing over them…this felt right.

His lips met hers, a gentle touch, and a spark, a beautiful, brilliant spark that resonated deep within her being, bringing to life a piece of her soul. Consumed with an overwhelming emotion, a feeling words could not justly describe, Hermione returned his kiss, wholeheartedly, forgetting about everything else. Time, space, and circumstance had lost meaning. They'd simply ceased to exist. All that was real, all that mattered in her world was Remus and the feel of his lips on hers, warm and firm and tender as he kissed her, melting away any tension she'd been experiencing, banishing any hesitations from her mind, leaving only a feeling of pure contentment in her heart.

It was powerful, it was perfect, and when he pulled away, she felt breathless and dazed. She gazed at Remus as if seeing him for the first time while feeling as though she had known him all her life.

He took her hand in his. "I really like you, Jean."

Hermione's heart swelled with incredible joy…

"I have for a while now," he revealed.

But then…

"Maybe even since we first met," he said.

Her mind flooded with panic.

"I have to go," she said abruptly, forestalling Remus's next words. "It's past curfew. I should be in my dorm."

"I'll walk you," Remus offered.

"No, that's alright." Hermione pulled her hand away from him and stepped back. "You don't have to do that."

"Jean, I—"

"I'll see you tomorrow."

Before Remus could say or do anything else, Hermione quickly retreated into the castle. She started running as soon as she was out of his sight and she didn't stop until she reached the quiet darkness of her dormitory. She leaned back against the closed door with her eyes shut, trying to catch her breath, trying to control her panic.

What just happened? What had she done? She sank to the floor, her head in her hands. Why had she allowed that kiss? Everything was just made infinitely more difficult and complicated.

What was she supposed to do now?

A/N: So there's their first kiss... Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed :) Please review and let me know what you think.