(Ok, FF must be having a seizure because I was sure that I uploaded this one ... twice)

Relax, this is not a dream. I have managed to write an update within a month of waiting! Blah... life... Life sucks sometimes.

Thirteen: Saying Farewell

It almost didn't seem real. What plans she and Edward had made, that is. Waking up that morning and running through them in her head, it felt as though these were long lost thoughts from a strange dream. But as the gentle sunlight fell over her face, rousing her with its soft warmth, she knew that there was no dream, no nightmare. Tonight was the night she would have to leave Forks, never to return. As a human, anyway. Her body was sluggish as she laid there. Her hands, with minds of their own, felt along the soft sheets of her bed. Tilting her head to the side, she took in that smell. What did she smell like, anyway? She supposed that one never really knew what their own scent was like. Yet everyone else did. She tried to picture what it was people thought of when they smelled her. An odd thought, but one that passed her mind nonetheless. With her nose buried deep within the pillow, she tried her best to take in the aroma of her pillow. After a few minutes, however, she could only detect the ghost of Charlie's laundry detergent. And yet it made her smile. She would have to take a small bag of it with her, just to remind her of what her bed smelled like to her. Maybe Esme would start using it whenever she washed her sheets. Or was there a point of washing laundry? Yet another odd conundrum came to her and she stared up at the ceiling. She pictured the petite and gentle Esme suddenly putting bloodstained clothes in the washer, perhaps humming to herself and taking fresh, clean clothes out to dry. Despite the morbid day ahead of her, Bella let out a little laugh. It was strange what the mind could think up.

She brought herself to a sitting position. Her closet had been cleaned the night before. Edward had arrived at her window sill and to pick up anything she might want or need in the future. Yet she couldn't leave her room completely bare, and so a few select garments, some which she hadn't worn in years, hung behind the cracked door of her closet. She wondered what Charlie would do with them when she was gone. A small hope suddenly came to her that he would donate them. Her eyes scanned the rest of the room. She could take no real photos or momentous. Charlie was a police officer. He would notice if something of value was missing from her room after tonight. More than likely, he would skim and scan every inch of it after she was gone. Bella didn't want that. She wanted this to be believable. She wanted Charlie to accept this, and not waste a minute looking for his daughter, as much as it pained her to think this. But then she came across the one thing of great value that she would be taking with her. She had already made up an excuse to give to Charlie that afternoon, and was going to make sure he saw her take it. Getting out of bed, she approached the big thing on her dressing table and pulled it into her hands.

It was the photo album she got the first birthday she ever spent in Forks. Her eighteenth. The terrible birthday that caused Edward and his family to leave her behind. And yet it was also the birthday that set in motion her time with Jacob, and caused her to meet Mac and his gang of werewolves. A sad smile came to her face, remembering all the adventures they had that summer. She hadn't heard anything from them after they left Washington. Remembering the pack leader's unfortunate fate, she hoped more than anything that Nickey, his devoted lover, had moved on, and lead the pack with the best of his ability. One of these days, she'd have to find them again. If they were all together.

Opening the photo album, she was immediately greeted by a group shot of her friends. What lives would they lead after this? Would they remember her when she was gone? Would they care? She flipped the page, smiling softly at photo after photo. Over the past month she had taken time to work on it. Photo albums weren't exactly a common thing to have anymore, but she spent almost every night making sure that every photo she ever took with her camera was placed perfectly in the pages. All that was left were a few blank spots near the back. That would be for tonight. Her last night as Bella Swan.

Bella took her time that morning. Helped Charlie with breakfast, took a bath, read outside in the sun. She didn't miss a detail. She wanted to remember every shadow, every crack of a bug, every little gust of wind against her face. Who knew what would change – really change – after tonight? But she pushed it aside for now. Now, she would focus on one thing: making tonight the best night with her friends that she ever had in her life. They would all head down to Port Angeles for the evening. Eat, shop, laugh... Anything that they wanted to do, Bella would oblige. She even let Jessica come over early on to give her the makeover she had pined to do for years. Angela had been invited as well, and the two girls were welcomed with a smile and wide open arms. Jessica, eyes bright and fingers busily opening her makeup kit, instructed Bella's every move, first insisting that she wash her hair (even though she had that morning anyway). After her hair was wet, Jessica sat her on the toilet and trimmed her frayed edges. Bella was helpless as her friend tinkered and toyed with her hair, loading it down with all sorts of products Bella wasn't even aware existed. But she let her friend do as she pleased. By the time she got a break, her hair was bound in tin foil and clips and rubber bands. She silently hoped that she wouldn't come out looking monstrous. She watched as Jessica left to grab something from her car, leaving she and Angela alone.

Bella smiled at her friend. "Do you think if I let her give me a manicure she'd orgasm?" Her smile suddenly dropped when Angela turned a sad, helpless face to her. It was almost as bad as if Angela had slapped her. For a moment, all was silent. Then, slowly, Angela stepped forward, her hands gripping together in front of her.

"Bella... What's going on?"

Those words were sharper than any fangs that ever pierced her. They struck her to the core, shaking her very foundation. She quickly brought back her smile, trying to safe face. "What do you mean?"

Angela wasn't buying it. "Ever since you came back, you've been hiding something." Her voice was soft, even for her. As she stood there, staring at Bella, looking for answers, Bella could see her friend's hands tremble. "What is it?" A silence hit the bathroom and Bella turned her eyes away, staring at the floor tile. "What do you plan to do?" In a way, she wished she could tell her. Get this burden off her shoulders. Perhaps if someone else knew, it would ease the pain.

But no. Angela was too sweet, too innocent. Angela... ever quiet, ever loyal. Always in the background, never causing trouble. Turning her head back up, she brought back her smile (a much truer one than before) and stood. They seemed to share a silent connection then. Angela knew that Bella would now never tell her the truth, and at that same time, Bella knew that Angela would always know it. Part of it anyway. Reaching forward, she brought her friend into a tight hug, closing her eyes and holding her close. Angela returned it, her hands desperately clinging to the back of Bella's shirt. Out of all the people she left behind, she hoped that Angela would have one of the best lives after this.

"Kay, so I got that – " Jessica's voice cut through the room like a lightning strike. The two friends broke the hug and turned to Jessica, who blinked at them before a little smile twitched on her face. "Did I interrupt something?" It wasn't hard to pick out the subtext from her inflection. Bella just rolled her eyes and sat back down on the toilet.

"Just finish your experiment, Dr. Frankenstein."

It took Jessica it good half hour more, but finally, she found herself finished and satisfied with her work. Standing up, Bella found that for once in her life, her hair was not frizzy. She almost didn't look like herself with such perfect, straight hair. She laughed, running her fingers through it. "Wow," she said brightly. "Why don't I let you do this more often?"

"Because you don't know what's good for you," said Jessica with a smile. "Now come on. Let's get you something to wear tonight."

Time went by like a flash, and before Bella knew it, she, Angela and Jessica had arrived at the seafood restaurant they all agreed on in Port Angeles. The guys were already there and waiting. Tyler, Eric, and Mike all sat in the lobby, waiting for their table to be called. Even before they were seated, Bella was determined to make this a memorable night. They took pictures by the fish tank, told jokes and shot the shit, as it were. Finally, they all were given a table and menus to boot. Mike let out a low whistle. "These are all really pricy... But we're all splitting, right?"

Bella smiled at them all. "I can cover it," she suggested. The others looked at her.

"Oh no, we'll all split the bill. Don't worry about it."

"Yeah, Bella. We'll pay."

"No, no, really." Bella set her menu on the table, looking at them with earnest eyes. This was going to be the last time she ever needed money. She wanted to spend every penny on something that mattered. This mattered. "I insist, guys. I have enough money left over from my college fund and I want to show you all how much I appreciate you guys." They looked at each other, surprised at her generosity. "This isn't reverse psychology. I really want to pay for all of you. And don't go ordering cheap stuff, either. Anything you want." The table was a little silent, wondering if they really should take Bella up on the deal. Finally, Mike spoke.

"Well in that case..." He made a comical gesture with his menu, making the rest of the table laugh. Her friends thanked her for her offer, and took her up on it. Since she insisted, of course. That had gotten the ball rolling to a great night. Despite everyone ordering something different, they all wound up sharing their plates. Bella managed to have at least a few bites out of every dish on the table. They spent a good two hours at that restaurant without even noticing the time fly. But eventually, the last bite was eaten, and the tab was paid. Bella put it on her card without a second thought. Debt collectors didn't call vampires anyway. Besides, all that she had left in her bank account was going to Charlie eventually. She just hoped that he'd take it.

After dinner, the group decided to hang out along the port. It was a Saturday night, so the place was still alive with all sorts of people. Above them, a few paper lanterns were strung up between buildings. Shops were open later, the sweet smells of bakeries and ice cream shops enticing them at every turn. They walked until their feet hurt, talked until their voices cracked. Bella didn't want the evening to end.

But 11:30 rolled around and she felt a weight in her stomach. The night, and the last moments she had with her friends, had come to a close. Turning and explaining that she needed to go, the others came around her for a big group hug. Bella felt herself welling up with tears, but pushed them back. Was she going to cry every time there was an emotional moment now? She squeezed back with all her might before waiving and making her way to her truck. Once inside, her hand went to her big photo album. She had just enough pictures to fill it.

She drove her way back to Forks. She didn't take the main road. Instead, she turned and headed down a narrow, swirling dirt road that not many took. She felt sick when she thought about how worried Charlie would be after this. But there was no other way. Taking a breath, she twisted and turned until her headlights came across a pale figure by the edge of the road. Edward stood on the side of a small cliff, leading down to a river bank. He would help her die tonight.

Bella drove the truck to the edge and got out, leaving it running. Grabbing her camera and album, she went to her vampire lover and greeted him with a gentle kiss. "Thank you... I got what I needed out of this month." Edward smiled softly, petting her unnaturally straight hair. It was Carlisle who had taken the risk of letting her back out, of course, Bella just felt like she needed to say those words. Edward gave her another kiss and walked to the back of her truck. As those strong, white hands gripped the metal, his fingernails piercing the dingy, red skin, Bella's insides twisted suddenly.

This truck had been with her through thick and thin while in Forks. It had been her welcome home present. Her closest companion. It wasn't fast, and it wasn't new. It guzzled gas and it had some problems with the suspension. But it was a loyal truck. Seeing it meet its own fate was cruel, almost. In her mind, she said her final goodbye as Edward pushed it over the cliff and into the watery ravine. It made the most awful noises as jolted its way down the rocky side, bumping and jumping along the uneven ground. Finally, it hit the thick river below it, splashing as it made contact. For a moment, it remained still. Then, the water slowly filled its open windows, and the machine was gradually lifted from the earthy bank and pushed deeper into the water. It wasn't long before all that was visible was the top of the cab. Edward's hand landed on her shoulder.

"Let's go home."

Home. Was that what it was now? She supposed so. Turning to Edward, she held him close around the neck, letting the cold wind brush up against her legs and arms. Edward pulled her into his own and lept upwards. A few bounds later, they vanished into the night.

Goodbye, Trucky. We'll miss you ;~;

T~