_ Chapter 5 _

Knots had formed comma starting from his neck and trailing down his spine from the restless sleep he'd suffered through, seated on the hardwood flooring of their bedroom. Andy's hand ran along the back of his head, from the stiffness he was beginning to feel. He started wishing he hadn't been so stubborn and slept in their bed instead, but then again, he knew she would have ended up on the couch if he did.

He glanced up at their empty bed and hoped that she'd eventually gotten out of the bath tub at a decent time. It was then that his insides started tearing him up, nearly as much as the soreness from his muscles. He used what little strength he had, that early in the morning and stood from the floor, using the wall to balance himself. Once he was on his feet, he shuffled to the bathroom door, pushing it open and revealing an empty room. The thought of something happening to her was one horrible thought he was grateful to dismiss.

It was odd for her to up and leave so early, so he was assuming she'd be downstairs either reading or watching TV, unless she was still angry with him, then she could be anywhere.

He tied the royal blue bathrobe hanging from the back of the bathroom door around himself and left the room, entering the hallway to where more silence awaited. "Virginia?" he called, rubbing his eyes as he adjusted to the light streaming in through the drawn back curtained windows.

She'd left him a handwritten note on the counter, telling him she'd gotten paged into work, and that was all. No "I love you' or even 'see you after work.' She had made it blatantly obvious that she was either very angry or upset.

_ AC _

After he'd realized Virginia may not be home until around dinner or later, he decided to head to the station to do some paperwork in the meantime.

He called her cellphone nearly five times and each time he was sent to her voicemail. He was beginning to worry about her. Part of him wanted to call Provenza and get his input on the situation, but then he remembered that he'd probably be pissed if he heard that Andy still hadn't told Virginia about his drinking. He was already digging himself a hole by keeping secrets form his girlfriend.

He walked into the kitchen after a quiet day of work noticed her seated on the opposite side of the counter, typing on her phone, still dressed in her day clothes. "Oh, there you are. You worked awfully long today."

Virginia's eyes didn't leave the screen as he met her on the other end, leaning in to kiss her hello, like usual. It was then that her focus left the phone and she pulled away, dodging his act of affection. "I made a quick supper earlier. Yours is in the refrigerator."

He was suddenly very confused. Why was she acting so strange? He was expecting her to want to talk about what happened the night before, or even for her to be angry, but not to be acting like nothing happened at all.

He decided to continue thinking about where to take it from there, as he walked over to the fridge, tripping on something in the process. His foot met the bottom of a suitcase, with Virginia's jacket and purse draped over the extended handle.

When he looked back her direction her eyes were already on him, her hands deep within her pockets.

"I'm leaving, Andy."

His heart nearly stopped in his chest from the words that he never hoped to hear leave her lips. Sure, he had treated her badly the weeks prior, and it wasn't something he was proud of, he felt dirty for keeping things from her but there was no need for her to leave. "Virginia…"

He spoke softly, pleading for some rationalization. "If this is because of last night, we can talk about it. I'd rather talk than-"

"It isn't because of last night," she spat, cutting him off.

Her heart was beating so quickly she was surprised it couldn't be heard by the man in front of her. It was beginning to be much harder than she'd thought to tell him then she'd originally thought. As a result of getting barely a few hours of sleep, she'd came to the devastating conclusion that she would have to leave, just long enough for him to figure out whatever was bothering him. She didn't feel that she could be of any help to him if he wasn't going to talk to her, or even give her the respect she deserved of knowing his whereabouts and when she'd see him next. It wasn't fair to her, and she wanted him to be happy, which he clearly wasn't.

His hand reached for hers, but she pulled it back knowing she couldn't handle the connection at that point.

"I packed a few things and I'm spending the weekend with Brandon and Kate. I think we need it. I think you need… some time."

She couldn't find the right words to tell him that she was going, but not for good and that it wasn't out of anger.

"Virginia, you don't have to leave. I can understand if you're angry with me, but you told me things were okay last night when I wanted to talk to you."

Her anxiety turned to frustration from hearing the words that sounded like he was turning it around on her. "I'm not okay.. Things aren't okay, please tell me that you can see that. I just- I don't think that things are turning out like I thought they would and I need to go. I can't deal with it anymore. Seeing you act so coldly makes me feel like you're not the person that I thought you were when I met you. I don't feel the same anymore."

Her hands were trembling as she pulled at her sleeves. "I'm not fine at all," She finally admitted.

It was nice to finally be able to say the things that were occupying her mind the entire week. Her words had left him silent, psychologically torturing her in the meantime. She wanted to know what he was thinking, and why he wasn't stopping her. Why wasn't he begging her to stay, or trying to make it better?

It had come time for her to go, and with shaking hands she reached for her suitcase, using all her strength to hold back tears. She felt drained when she thought she'd feel powerful, leaving and taking control of her life again. It didn't feel like she was gaining anything, but instead felt like she was losing a part of herself

On the way out the door and on the drive farther away from him the words he'd said before she left stuck to her mind, "Okay, yeah… Take the time you need. I'll wait."

_ AC _

The sound of the car door shutting hard behind her hadn't even come yet when the first tear rolled down her cheek. She had promised herself that she'd be strong and not back down after leaving, but the pressure was getting stronger each second.

Leaving was the easy part in comparison to the heart wrenching feeling that came afterward. As she sat in the car, driving down the freeway, she realized that he was who she needed during times like this. She imaged him sitting beside her and reaching for her hand, telling her to take deep breaths and thats what she did. His voice was so soothing when he tried to calm her, unlike everyone else's who just pestered her.

Her stomach tightened, and she felt herself growing closer to another panic attack. She didn't want to have to pull over just to settle down, so she reminded herself to breathe properly and pushed on through the traffic.

By the time she pulled up to her brother's driveway and pulled out the keys, her hands were shaking and it was getting harder to breathe. Aside from Andy, Brandon was the only other person who she could depend on.

She banged on the door, and pulled on the edge of her cardigan into her chest, trying to suppress her nerves. It wasn't until she saw the door slowly creak open that she remembered the girls were most likely sleeping at this time of night.

She went to speak, but couldn't get the words past her throat. Now, not only was she feeling sick due to her devastation but now also because of the fear that she'd woken up her nieces.

It was Kate who answered the door. Usually Virginia would be annoyed with her, but in the moment her emotions were so raw she was just grateful to have someone to go to. "Virginia… What on earth happened?!"

She ushered the sobbing woman into the house with a hand on her back, trying to support her as best she could. Very rarely did she come to them when she was going through something. Especially since Andy had moved in. "Honey, I can get Brandon if you want. He's just working in his-"

"N-no," she choked back, following the younger woman into the dimly lit kitchen.

"I don't w-want to b-bother him."

Even Kate knew that it was unlike Virginia to choose speaking to her about something instead of Brandon. She was initially touched by the action, but then came to the realization that something must be really wrong for Virginia to feel safe talking about it to anyone but Andy or Brandon. "Why don't I put on some tea, and we can talk?"

Virginia nodded her head sadly, her mouth twisting into a frown as she tried suppressing the nerves in her stomach. Virginia took a seat at the table and worked on composing herself, while Kate got busy boiling the kettle and preparing their tea.

She set the mug down in front of Virginia and sat across from her at the dark mahogany table. "So tell me what happened? Did something happen at work? Are you hurt?"

Virginia's hands surrounded the warmth of the cup as she searched for the right words to start with. "No, I left him."

The blond woman leaned in, suddenly significantly more interested than before. "You left Andy?! Why, what did he do?"

Usually this was the point in the conversation where Virginia would roll her eyes, but she wasn't about to pick a fight with her brother's wife who was kind enough to invite her in that late at night. Especially when most of their conversations went terribly wrong and usually ended with someone accusing the other of being impossible to be around, or Brandon having to come between them and tell them to knock it off. "That's exactly it, I don't know what he's done. Or what I've done, but he won't talk to me."

Kate's hand reached for her's sympathetically, naturally making her want to pull back, but she didn't due to the circumstances. "Well, how long has it been going on?"

It took her a moment to calculate her answer and the result only made her feel worse. "A couple of weeks."

Kate sucked in a breath, showing the concern that immediately came to mind. "Virginia, I'm sorry to say this honey, but it sounds like he might be seeing another woman."

Her eyes shot up from the table and she was on his defence in a matter of seconds. "No no… Andy wouldn't do something like that. He may have poor communication skills, and lack responsibility, but he would never be unfaithful to me."

Virginia seemed rather adamant with the young woman's proposal being false. She hadn't even considered a thought like that. Andy had never shown any signs of interest towards other women. It was very unlikely that he was seeking another woman every night he was coming home late. He may have been acting weirdly, but he still came home to her, kissed her and told her he loved her. Very little cheating men would have the audacity to do such a thing. Come to think of it, Andy was the man that had loved her most so far in her life. He treated her better than she could ask for and this was the only issue she'd had with him, this far into their relationship. Virginia figured Kate must clearly exaggerating, she was sure that her Andy loved her too much to be unfaithful.

Her phone rang in her pocket and she thought twice about answering. She wasn't sure how she'd react if it were Andy, and she didn't really feel like dealing with anyone else. She pulled it out anyway, her worrying getting the best of her. A photo of Andy's smiling daughter came across the screen and she couldn't ignore it. She sniffled before sliding her finger across to answer. "Hello?"

Nicole could tell almost immediately something was wrong. "Hey, Virginia are you with dad?"

"No, I'm at my brother's house. Why, is there something wrong? Are you okay?"

She couldn't possibly bear any bad news from Nicole at this point. She was hardly finding the strength to cope with leaving the house. "No, everything is fine here, but I've been calling dad and isn't answering. Do you know where he is?"

Virginia really didn't feel like explaining to her step daughter that her and her father were arguing, but she wouldn't let Nicole fear that something worse had happened. "Actually, I haven't seen him since a few hours ago. We aren't really talking right now."

A gasp came from the other side of the line, and Virginia hoped it wouldn't follow a line of questions. "Oh my gosh, it was that bad?"

She furrowed her eyebrows and look over at Kate who was trying desperately to follow along the conversation for the juicy gossip. "Was what bad?"

"You're that angry that he'd been drinking again that you left him? Virginia…."

"What? No- I didn't…. Andy's what?"

She couldn't believe the words she had heard come from Nicole's mouth. Andy had started drinking again?

"What? Didn't he tell you? It's been going on for a few weeks now, I assumed that you knew, I'm so sorry."

Virginia was still stunned from the news that she couldn't think of a response. Kate spoke up, once she noticed the pause in conversation. "Virginia, what happened? Are you alright?"

She knew it was an empty gesture, Kate just wanting to be let in on the drama. "No, I- you're mistaken. Andy would have come to me. He tells me everything, Nicole. Who told you this?"

"Dad told me the last night I spent at your house. He promised he was going to tell you, I don't know what happened.

Nicole was so disappointed in her father. Of course she felt bad for him, having to cope with his alcoholism again, and not having anyone to help him, but he was stupid for not telling his girlfriend. Virginia was so nice from what Nicole could tell, and she would be livid once she found out Andy was keeping this from her. She'd want to be there for him, and help him through it.

"Ugh… This makes me so mad! I told him to tell you and he said he would. He shouldn't have kept this from you all this time. I'm sorry Virginia, he's such an ass sometimes."

Virginia's attention was drawn back from her thoughts and she cringed from hearing Nicole talk about her dad like that for the first time to her. "Nicole Flynn! Do not talk about your father like that. I'm sure he has a good reason for not telling me."

She may not have been Nicole's mother, but she wouldn't let the younger woman talk about her father in such a way after all the times she'd sat and listened to Andy boast about her.

"Andy isn't perfect, he makes mistakes too sometimes."

Nicole could tell that she'd made the other woman upset. She hadn't meant to let her anger out like she had, but she really couldn't understand how her father could mess up like that. All he had to do was tell the truth, but instead he'd ended up alone with no one to help him.

Virginia's nerves started up again and she suddenly felt awkward sitting on the couch with her brother's wife, when she should be at home with her unstable boyfriend.

"I'm sorry for getting angry with you, I hope you won't think badly of me. I should really get back to the house now and check on him. I hope he's alright."

She couldn't imagine how she'd feel if she got home and something was wrong, after she'd left him without giving him the chance to explain. "No, you're right Virginia. I'm sorry. Go make sure he's okay, I'll call later."

She said goodbye to Nicole and hung up, shoving the phone into the pocket of her cardigan.

She had to get home to Andy. He needed her and she wasn't there; it made her feel horrible. Even though he didn't deserve her sympathy, she couldn't be angry with him while knowing how drinking had destroyed his family. She reached for her bags, and left her sister-in-law in the living room, wondering what was going on. "Wait, Virginia… What happened? Where are you going?"

"I need to go back home. Andy needs me. I don't know why I came here in the first place, I'm sorry."

She thanked Kate on the way out for being there for her -sort of- when she needed it and headed back home as quickly as possible.

When she got there, she noticed the house was empty. It set her nerves off right away. She checked the home phone first, hoping he'd left a trail to where he was. Nicole's name came up twice and then her own. No sign whatsoever. It appeared as though he'd taken his phone, wallet and jacket and left. She couldn't assume right off the bat something was wrong. Although, she was having a hard time convincing herself otherwise.

Maybe he had gone to visit Provenza. He was probably upset with her leaving and needed a friend to talk to. She sat down on the couch, and fell asleep soon after with her phone held in her hands.

Hours later, Andy stumbled in through the door, carelessly knocking over a few things in the process. He shrugged out of his jacket and hung it on the hook. The light from the kitchen, drew him in, and the thought of another drink sounded really good at the moment. He tripped on the way the counter, knocking over a bar stool with a loud thud. The sound woke Virginia up, and her eyes flew wide open. Andy?

She sat up, and looked over her shoulder, relief flooding through her once she saw him, safe and sound in their house. It took her a moment to notice his behaviour, and how he wasn't aware she was there.

The refrigerator swung open and she heard the sound of glass bottles clanging against one another. It was then she realized he was probably drunk. She was off the couch and running into the kitchen in a matter of seconds. It was her fault that he was drunk in the first place, and she was not going to let him have any more drinks. She came around behind him and grabbed the bottle from him. "Andy, you don't need another drink."

It took him a few seconds to process what was going on and then a look of surprise came across his face. "Virginia I thought you were gone. Why are you here…?"

His words were slurred, and his breath reeked of alcohol. "I came back to make sure you were okay."

She put the bottles back into the fridge, which irritated him. At that point, she didn't care if he was violent or aggressive drunk, in her mind she was doing what she could to help him. She would have to find out the harder way.

"No I need another drink."

She ignored his complaint and wrapped her arm around his torso, offering support. "No, I'm taking you to bed and you're going to sleep."

Easily enough, he complied and allowed her to steer him towards the bedroom. He was making it incredibly difficult for her to help, being nearly twice her size and bumping into things on the way to their room. "Andy, please stop it. I'm trying to help."

Her words were going in one ear and out the other, as he leaned against the wall, taking her with him. "You're so niiiice. Thank you for being so nice, I love yooou."

Although she couldn't help but find his words adorable, she knew he was drunk and he wouldn't even remember them in the morning.

His lips trailed down her neck, his warm breath against her making her shiver. "Andy…"

She pushed against him, not wanting anything to do with him until he was sober and could at least control himself.

She slid under his arms and away from the wall, taking his hand pulling him into their bedroom.

She sat him down on the bed and took off his shirt, while his hands wrapped around her waist, trying to pull her closer. "Andy, you're making this extremely difficult."

She finally got him down to his undershirt and boxers and got dressed herself. She joined him back in the bedroom and climbed into bed, knowing he'd do the same if she did.

Once they were under the covers, he pulled her into him, inevitably easing her nerves. The warmth of him against her calmed her down enough to remember why she was angry with him. It was too late, and he was too drunk to talk to her at that point. She knew she'd have to talk to him in the morning, once he sobered up.

_ AC _

The following day started with a pounding headache for him, and two weeks worth of regret. It hurt his head to think about having to talk to Virginia once she woke up.

She slept soundly next to him, looking too peaceful to disturb. The past few weeks had been nothing but taking for granted the woman asleep next to him. The woman that he knew would do anything for him if he just asked; to the point where it scared him.

He stroked his fingers through her hair and wondered how he could possibly gain her forgiveness. He couldn't remember very much from the night before, but based on his pounding headache, he was sure it was pretty bad.

He watched her eyes flutter in her sleep and realized how wrong he'd been to avoid telling her for so long. He'd reacted so calmly last night, completely opposite to what he'd expected. The whole time he'd been putting off the conversation out of fear that it wasn't the right time for them, or he didn't want to add more stress on to her life, but in the end he'd just hurt her.

She turned on to her side, curling into him, and opened her bright green eyes. They were the only ones that had a way of looking into him. "Have you finished thinking yet?"

He smiled tiredly, from how well she had grown to know him. He wasn't quite sure what to say first. His first instinct was to apologize for being such an ass, and then to thank her for taking care of him the night before, when he wasn't at his best. He hated that she'd seen him like that. It wasn't certainly wasn't his intention.

She saw the hesitation in his face and tried making it as easy as possible. Virginia felt that after days of waiting, she should at least hear an explanation from him, telling her why he wouldn't go to her. "Andy it's okay… I'm not mad. Let's talk about it."

Her hand reached for his, hoping he wasn't still afraid to discuss his drinking with her.

Not knowing where to begin, an involuntary sigh left his mouth.

Her thumb smoothed down across his much bigger hand as she patiently waited to hear from him. "Why don't you tell me how it started?"

She moved in closer to him, trying to absorb the heat.

"I guess it was just a really bad week I had, and I made the mistake of thinking that a drink would help."

"But one drink is never the case. I should have known. I'm so sorry."

"Andy, I'm familiar with the issue of alcoholism and it's perfectly normal for you to fall back into old habits… but its how you dealt with it that upsets me. You should have come to me, and I would have helped you. What have I ever done that would make you afraid to share that with me?"

Andy always did such a great job of helping her when she needed it, and she wanted to give that back to him now, when he needed her most. Maybe he was just afraid of what happened the last time he confessed to the people he cared about.

She knew based on his response that he was still dreading the conversation, and although she felt like it needed to be discussed she could tell that he wasn't up for it at that time.

She pressed her lips against his jaw and held his hand in hers against her chest. "Andy, I will love you no matter what and we're going to get you help."

She kissed him softly this time on the lips, and gave him a small smile of reassurance.

In that moment, her profound love was clear as day to her and she couldn't remember a time she mean those three words more. Her words hung for a few moments, before she repeated them to make sure he'd caught it. "I love you, Andy."

In a time of guilt and shame, her words couldn't help but make his heart beat faster. Those words had never come out of her in such a way, and even though he had the feeling she felt that way, it still warmed his heart when she said them alone. "I love you too."

_ AC _

At this point I'm totally open to any trope suggestions, since I understand theres been a lack of fluff. Feel free to let me know if you wanna see more of something between these two. As always... thanks so much for reading!

Forever thankful to my incredible beta and new 'real life' friend Cass! xo