- Authors note -
ALERT: A little bit of spoiler about the "Red Spider arc" This is by far the chapter I enjoyed writing the most thus far. Thanks Red Spider arc for inspiring me for this chapter xD Also this chapter came up MUCH faster than i thought. Anyway, Enjoy ^^
- Hinowa, Tsukuyo and Seita, may I ask who these people are? A handsome boy in his early twenties asked, he had short black hair and beautiful yellow/orange eyes. His black locks covered a little bit of his left eye. He had a black formal yukata with yellow flowers as decorations.
- These people are Kagura and Shinpachi. Shinpachi, Kagura this is my erhm.. Friend Kou. Kou this is Shinpachi and Kagura.
Tsukuyo answered him as politely as she could and then took a smoke off her pipe. In this room where currently, Hinowa, Seita, Kagura, Shinpachi, herself, Kou, his mother Aura and his dad Kamei, all of them had formal clothes in their signature colours.. But the silver permed idiot where nowhere to be seen. Why the hell did he take such a long time? She was in a crisis here after all.
- Ah, I see. Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too mister!
- Nice to meet you..
Kagura and Shinpachi answered in unison.
- Oi Kagura, be more polite towards Tsukuyo sans friend and soon-to-be fiancé and husband!
Kagura just snorted at Shinpachi. She didn't like the thought about that guy becoming Tsukki's fiancé. It was clear as day that Tsukuyo had feelings for Gin chan and vice versa.
Tsukuyo decided to ask Shinpachi where the perm head was while Hinowa and Seita chatted with Kou and his family. Kagura just sat there frowning. She didn't like this at all. "Gin chan should be the one sitting across the table for a marriage meeting with Tsukki.. not this guy…" she thought silently for herself.
- Shinpachi, where's Gintoki? She whispered only audible enough for him to hear.
- I.. I don't know Tsukuyo san. We searched everywhere through the room but we couldn't find him. The only ones there was me, Kagura and Sadaharu who slept on top off some sort off pillow.
- Whaat? Do you say that he escaped out of this mess?
- No he would never do such a thing Tsukuyo san. Maybe he just went of to buy his jump [1]. It's monday afteral?
- huh? buying jump now? Of all days? what the hell is he-
- Uhm, Tsukuyo are you okay. You look a bit pale? Kou interrupted their little whisper argument so suddenly that both Tsukuyo and Shinpachi jumped.
- I, I am completely okay. I am just a little bit sleepy that's all.
What the hell was she gonna do now? The idiot has probably run of to safety from all this and she had no way to get out of this without hurting her friends feelings..
His mother suddenly began to speak
- I would be so happy to get someone like you into our family Tsukuyo san.
- Ah ha ha, she laughed awkwardly Uhm, It's just that!-
The shoji doors suddenly flew open and a silver haired man stood in between the "frames" of the shoji doors.
- Tsukuyo honey, I'm home!
- Some moments before from Gintoki's side -
What the hell, I need to come up with a plan. And that quickly. Damn those two brats for not waking me up? And why did they just let me sleep in, in the first place!?
He heard a man talking. Was this her probably-to-be fiancé? He got curious so he opened the shoji doors a little to hear everything better.
- These people are Kagura and Shinpachi. Shinpachi, Kagura this is my erhm.. Friend Kou. Kou this is Shinpachi and Kagura.
He heard Tsukuyo talking. Aaah, they've already begun! He began to panic. What should he do? What should he doo?
He desperately tried to come up with a plan when that jackass of a man suddenly began to speak again.
- Uhm, Tsukuyo are you okay. You look a bit pale?
What? He was playing the "polite" card on her huh? That little piece of shit. "I am sure that he acts all nice and polite now but after their wedding he will turn out to be the shittiest scumbag ever who abuses his wife. I won't let that happen Tsukuyo I swear!"
Then he suddenly remembered that time when they pretended to be lovers when they infiltrated the Benigumoto (red spiders). It's worth a shot.. It's now or never..
In a lack of time and his anxiety slowly building up he hastily shot up the shoji doors and looked as calm as ever with a calm expression on his face while uttering the words that took everyone by surprise, even himself.
- Tsukuyo honey, I'm home!
- Now back to the presence -
- Tsukuyo honey, I'm home!
- Ehhhh?!
- Whaaaat?!
- Huuuuuh?!
Kagura, Seita and Shinpachi screamed in unison. Tsukuyo looked with a what-the-hell-did-he-just-say? expression, Hinowa just looked as if she had the time off her life and Kou and his family looked terrified at the man.
- T.. Tsukuyo H.. honey? Tsukuyo? W.. what's the meaning of this? I.. Is he your husband?
- Yeah! yes, he, he's my husband. Ah ha ha. Right dear? "what took you so long dumbass?"
Gintoki walked towards Tsukuyo and the others and took a seat between Tsukuyo and Kagura. He took his arms around Tsukuyoäs waist to make the act even more convincing and Shinpachi couldn't stand this situation anymore even though it had just started so he fainted.
- O.. Of course we are! Kagura chan, our daughter. How are you feeling. "I'm sorry, A huge ass dog slept on top off me!"
- I.. I am feeling good. A.. And you father?! Are you good? "don't drag me into this you shithead of a samurai!"
The three talked with each other through their minds as if it was the most normal thing to do while holding up a facade towards Kou and his family. And it miraculously worked. Seita just sat there like a statue. Not managing to proceed what's happening. Kou looked as if his future had been destroyed and really embarrassed (well it actually had, His future with Tsukuyo that is). His parents on the other hand was beginning to get furious. How dare this woman have a husband and not mentioning it and letting it proceed to a marriage meeting with their son?
- I am feeling a little bit tired my dear DEAR daughter, morning jogging from 8:30 to 12:45 sure drags one's energy.. But now when I'm back home with my dear daughter and wife it feels like all my energy has come back "Who are you calling shithead, It's thanks to me that you have a roof over your head you little brat!"
He made sure that his words would hurt that bastard whom's name he did not now. This was a war. And he was not gonna show any mercy. Those who show mercy in a war are the ones who loses first.
- Uhm, If your morning jogging laster from 8:30 up until now could it really be called a morning jogging then? Kou suddenly asked. In confusion. His heart felt as if it was ripped to pieces bu a thousand swords.
- What are you talking about, If you begin the jogging in the morning then it doesn't matter when you end it it's still morning jogging. So, who are you guys? And what are you doing in my and my wifes home? "And did I forget that I'm the one paying your food you little brat?"
Tsukuyo felt how her cheeks turned redder and redder when Gintoki took a stronger grip around her waist.
- We were having a marriage meeting.. but your wife never told us she had a husband! His father answered towards the silver haired samurai. He was enraged. How can this woman whom they've known for years do something like this towards their son?
- I, I can explain. I.. I tried to tell you that i had a husband but you guys never let me a chance to tell you.. eh he.. "Forget about roof and food you idiot! Didn't I and Hinowa ask you not to make me hurt his feelings. This is the clear opposite of that!" she screamed in her mind conversation with the yato and samurai.
- Mother didn't mean any harm. Please don't get angry at mom! Kagura put on a sad face with cute puppy dog eyes and made some crocodile tears come out. "Let's just forget about this losers feelings. He's ugly anyway (handsome). Also can I have some food?"
If She was gonna get dragged into this mess more than she already was then the least she could do was to play along.
- Ah, Kagura my child don't cry! Gintoki tried to calm down his daughter and wiped off the crocodile tears of her face with the sleeves of his yukata. "Forget about food you brat! But she's right. Forget about this losers feelings. He's nothing anyway. I say we dump him in a dump, he looks like he's from there anyway so it would just be like sending him home!"
- what, are we the ones who has done something wrong now? When your wife's totally the one who started all this? His mom suddenly butted in.
- Who started what? Did you guys even give her some time to give her opinion about this marriage meeting? Gintoki tried to defend Tsukuyo the best he could. He had helped madao in a similar situation so it shouldn't be any problems.
- We asked Hinowa of course and she said that Tsukuyo gladly would like to marry our son. His mom continued her little rant.
- Well Hinowa doesn't have much of a brain anyway so that doesn't make any sense. Also my wife is the one who's answer you should listen too not her's!
As soon as he ended that comment Gintoki felt something heavy hitting his head and fell straight dwon to the ground. "That brainless woman had hit him! She's just like Otae!"Why? Why did he meet gorilla women wherever he where? And if it wasn't gorilla women then it was drunk terminators!"
And as he finished another comment in his thoughts a kunai struck his head as he was lying on the floor. "The drunk terminator had hit him with a kunai!"
Kou's family was scared of what they saw before them. The samurai that was sitting before them just a second ago was now lying deadly as a stock on the floor with a big bump and a kunai on his head.
- You just insulted me in your head again didn't you?
- I.. I don't k.. know w..what you are t..talking.. about? Gintoki stumbled with his words as he tried to get up.
When the three people before him suddenly saw that he had blood covering his face as he stood up they did not hesitate to run away from there while the two men screamed like girls and the mother screamed like a man. Hilarious indeed.
- gyaaaaah!
- Yaaaaah!
- uuuuuuuh!
As the three people ran of Seita finally managed to proceed what was happening and began laughing hysterically, Shinpachi came back to his senses and scowled at Gintoki for being late and reckless. Kagura had walked off towards the kitchen a long time ago.
- ah, they ran away? Isn't that good for you Tsukuyo san? Hinowa gladly commented for the sake of her friend.
- I.. I don't know… I.. don't really know what just happened.. She took a smoke off her pipe while looking blankly towards the shoji doors the three people had run out off. "what the hell had just happened in this very room?"
I hope you liked this chapter xD. This really was fun writing. Next chapter will probably be the last. Also sorry for not updating "The Perfect Mission" But I just don't get any ideas of what i'll do for next chapter. So I would really like it if you sended a review on that fanfiction on some ideas and this fanfiction on what I can improve. Thanks alot for reading ^^ And sorry for making such a blunt end to the meeting. I just wanted it to be more humor so I did the best I could.
[1] Jump or more like Shonen Jump is a weekly published Japanese series for boys/teenagers with shonen (male lead) manga in it such as Gintama, Hunter x Hunter, Naruto etc. It's published every monday if i remember correctly.