Chapter 30: To Ponder Fate
{A/N: I wasn't planning on uploading with the Easter holiday in the way ... hopefully the move will be canceled and I can upload frequently once more...also no one said I wouldn't be typing, I simply said that the uploads will be slow-S.S.}
My Thanks To All My Readers And Reviewers...Enjoy-S.S.
Snape's Quarters, Slytherin Dungeons, Hogwarts...
Morning seemed to come all too soon for Severus Snape as he painstakingly stretched in his black four poster bed. He had not been alone of course. The scent of jasmine and the warmth of Hermione's slender frame pressed against him as she nuzzled her cheek against his pale chest. The Potions Master caught himself smiling. He recalled telling the witch he had loved her the night before. It felt good to do so, almost freeing. Never in his life had he felt so free. His wildest dreams haven't even come close to this. Hermione stretched and pressed her warm frame further against him. The Potions Master had been dreaming much like before. Only instead of seeing a young wizard with his looks and temperament, he came face to face with a weary witch about sixteen years into the future.
{ Severus had recognized her instantly. Even though time seemed to wash away the unbridled innocence and intellectual defiance. Her skin had paled, her attire a mix of something he would have chosen and what he had seen on McGonagall over the years. The lines of worry and sorrow etched into her once vibrant face had been an indication to a life he would know nothing about.
The bushy amber hair of youth had been styled in a aged woman bun, so much like McGonagall it was frightening. Her robes were black and billowed when she walked her face twisted in between stern intellect and admiration as she looked upon him. Time had hardened her. He had known about that first hand.
There was bitterness and rage hidden below the surface that he could not help but identify.
"No." he said in a whisper as silent tears spilled down his own pale cheeks.
"Hello Severus." she said.
Her voice gruff and blanketed with sorrow.
She kept her distance as though to not trust herself in the face of this "illusion."
" I have caused you a great deal of pain..." he said almost as if it had been a question.
"No." she replied her voice still gruff. "You have given me abundant happiness."
"I-I do not understand." said Snape unsure if he believed her.
She gave him a weak smile and he could faintly make out the glint of wonder in her eyes.
"You...are a wonderful man Severus Snape." she said. "You saved my life and gave me the greatest gift you could..."
Snape suddenly understood.
"Phaeron." he said.
She nodded.
"I didn't know at the time what a precious gift he had been." she admitted. "My heart was filled with grief."
Snape understood this as well.
"So it's true?" he asked not wishing to say the words.
She simply nodded as tears streamed down her pale cheeks.
"Don't cry." he said softly. "Gryffindor."
"I miss you Slytherin." she said still letting the tears fall. "More than you will ever know."
Snape nodded.
"Do you not have your friends or family to get you through this?" he asked.
She sighed.
"I haven't spoken to Ron Weasley in years, though his girls attend school with Phaeron." she said. "As for my family they have been supportive, as have the Malfoys."
"The Malfoys?" he asked stunned by her words.
A smile came across her paled lips.
"Lucius, Narcissa, and Draco." she said with a smile. "They love so very much Phaeron."
Snape shook his head.
"Let me guess Lucius has appointed himself godfather." he said.
She nodded.
"To his credit, it was all out of love for you Severus." she said. "We were all devastated when..."
Snape held up his hand.
"I want no details." he said. "I understand."
She nodded once more.
"I am so sorry." she said as the tears continued. "You didn't deserve what..."
Snape decided to change the subject.
"Tell me how is Potter these days?" he asked with his usual sarcastic wit. "Still as annoying as ever?"
"I do not speak to him." she replied, the rage rippling behind her amber eyes.
Snape thought it curious that she ceased speaking with her former best friend.
"Any chance converse with Ginerva?" he asked with an arched eyebrow. "She was quite supportive of our union."
Again the amber eyes flashed anger.
"Severus, I do not and will not associate with the Potters." she said meaningfully.
Associate with the Potters?" he said confused for a moment. "She's married the little prat then?"
There was no answer.
"Severus I do not wish to waste the only time we have together on them." she said with danger in her tone.
Snape sighed and folded his arms across his ebony clad chest.
"Fate it seems can be quite a cruel mistress." he said.
"On that we agree." she replied, all hostility gone from her tone.
It was strange watching the woman he had known since she was the age of twelve stand before him aged and more like him then he would care to note.
"What's happened to you?" he asked with his eyebrow arched once more.
"I-I grew up." she replied her tone gruff and stern once more.
"You grew into a witch with the odd mix of McGonagall and my temperaments." he said stunned.
She sighed.
"I suppose I have lived up to the title of Professor Snape then." she said.
"Professor?" he asked.
"Charms mistress, or simply Professor Snape would do." she said.
Snape chuckled some at this.
"Silly wand waving." he said. "Of course."
"Of course." she said the suddenly sadness overtook her once more. "We never had much time."
Snape sighed taking in the sadness of her amber eyes.
"I know." he said softly. "There was a war going on."
"It's still going on in your time." she said. "If I remember correctly, you had just gotten back from Vold..."
Snape let out a hiss and clutched his right forearm.
"Don't say that name." he said through rapid breath.
"You just came back from him didn't you?" she asked.
"Yes." he replied.
She suddenly smiled, at ease for the first time.
"You won't be asleep much longer if memory serves me correct." she said.
Before Snape could offer a retort or ask another question he was suddenly jolted out of his dream.}
Amber eyes had been locked onto his obsidian ones as he noted Hermione straddling him. He crushed his pale lips into her pink ones taking in the youth and warmth of her. He had not understood how she would go from this lovely young witch to the older bitter one in his dream but he had hoped that he could prevent it from happening.
"D-Did you mean it?" she asked softly as he trailed his kisses along her neck.
"Did I mean what?" he asked still busily kissing her smooth flesh.
"Did you mean it when you said..." she started faltering at the words.
"That I love you." he finished.
She looked at him for a moment. Her amber eyes filled with hope and wonder. The image of the older bitter witch from his dreams returned and he pondered briefly if he had something to do with her changes, she seemed to recall this quite vividly. Perhaps this was the defining moment that would shape her personality in the future.
"Yes." he replied pulling her into another kiss. "I meant every word...Mrs. Snape."
Hermione crashed her pink lips into his pale ones.
"I love you so much, Severus." she said softly between kisses. "I-I didn't think that I would ever get the chance to tell you."
Snape ran his pale calloused right hand across her youthful face. He couldn't stop looking into her vibrant amber eyes.
"You shouldn't love me." he said.
"I know." she replied.
"I shouldn't want you this much." he said.
"I know." she replied. "But if I can't be wanted by my husband...then who else would I be wanted by?"
Snape let out a low his as he felt his erection stir.
"I believe Mrs. Snape that your friends will be missing you this morning." he said.
There was a glint behind the young witch's amber eyes as she noted that she now had The Potions Master's undivided attention.
"Yes." she said. "A shame isn't it?"
Snape let out a low growl.
"Very much so." he replied.
The rest of the morning both Mr. and Mrs. Snape had been too preoccupied to enter the great hall and have breakfast. Hermione's friends were indeed trying to figure out what had been keeping her. She emerged some time later, jubilant and energetic. Snape had been his usual brooding self except when he stole casual glances at the amber eyed witch baring his last name.
He had hoped that whatever caused her to change so drastically had been staved off for good. She was too young and intelligent a witch to be so bitter and filled with seemingly unending sorrow.