Chapter 6
Charlie's and Mac's Day Off
2:45 PM
Monday
New Orleans
Mac and Charlie leave the car as Mac takes Frank's credit card and hands Frank the car keys. They walk off and enter the Convention Center. Looking around through random fliers, they find a schedule of upcoming events. There is a Comic Con a month from today, a Dentist Convention for a month and a half from now, and finally a Bar Tender's Convention two months from today.
"Oh man, dude, that's so awesome. We could totally go to that." said Charlie, pointing at the Bar Tender's Convention on the flier
"Dude, but thats like 2 months from now. Besides Charlie, we're here on vacation, not business." said Mac
"I mean, ok, yeah. But I am just saying man. Since we're already here there's no reason why we can't do both." said Charlie
"Thats a good point Charlie. But still, the convention isn't until 2 months from now. And there's nothing going on right now." said Mac
"Yeah, ok, lets ditch this place." said Charlie
Mac and Charlie continued walking, then went up the escalator. They eventually got to a pedestrian overpass, where looking down through the glass windows they could see a train track and a freight train coming from a distance. They continued walking until they got to the other side, with a sign welcoming them to the Riverwalk Mall. As they entered the mall, they encountered the food court.
"Oh man, I am starting to get kinda hungry. Dude, we should probably grab a bite." said Charlie
"Yeah, ok Charlie. Does Panda Express work for you." said Mac
"Well, I was hoping for something kinda local and authentic. Not something that we could get back in Philadelphia." said Charlie
"But dude. This is the mall. I don't think they'll have anything authentic. Dude, I say we should just get Panda Express." said Mac
Mac and Charlie continued arguing for about 5 more minutes about where they want to eat until they decided to go with Panda Express.
After they finish eating, they go out on the balcony and watch one large cruise ship leave, and another one return. They see several barges and small boats sail by. They are having the time of their lives, playing a game involving guessing where the ships will go. After some time of enjoying the sight, they head back inside the mall and continued their way, when suddenly Charlie had an idea.
A merchant in a kiosk was talking to a customer when suddenly Charlie interrupted him half-way.
"Hey, excuse me. I was just wondering. We're wondering if you happen to know where the Mardi Gras parades are." asked Charlie
"Huh?" said the merchant, a surely, middle-aged black men, looking in confusion.
"Man, yo, Mardi Gras over dawg." replied the merchant.
"Well, ok, yeah. I mean yeah, I know that. I am sure the OFFICIAL Mardi Gras for the tourists is over. But I am not talking about the one for the tourists. I mean you know, I am sure there's like a local Mardi Gras that the tourists don't know about, only the real local people know about." said Charlie
"Oh yeah, thats right dude. I am sure they have like a Treme version. Dude, man, I saw Treme. Man, the authentic city." added Mac.
"Naw man. 'Dey don't have nothing like that brah. Sorry 'bout that." replied the clerk
"Well, ok, but I mean they have to have something." asked Charlie
"Naw, sorry dude." replied the merchant
"Ok then. How much are these plates." asked Mac, pointing to various metal"Parking for only. All others will be towed." signs
"They all five dollars." replied the merchant
"Ok, get me that one." Mac pointed to the "Parking for Eagle Fan's only, all others will be towed" sign.
"That'll be five fitty." replied the merchant.
"Man, yalls from Philly. I got a cousin that moved up there. He's always complaining that he's surrounded by Eagle fan. I mean I guess it could be worse, he could have moved to A.T.L." continued
"Or Dallas." joked Mac
"Man, sheeeeeeet. Man, fuck the Cowgirls." said the merchant.
"Yall have a good one." the merchant continued as Mac paid and they continued walking.
"Man, I can't believe the sales tax is so high." said Charlie
"I know right." said Mac
"Man, Charlie. You know what. I think we have to face it. Dude, I think Dennis was right. We have to face it, I think we lost the bet." continued Mac
"Dude, man. I am telling you. Don't lose faith. I am sure we'll find a Mardi Gras somewheres" said Charlie
"Ok, maybe. But I really think we lost this one." said Mac as they continued walking, then finally existed the mall and walked out in the direction of the Spanish Plaza.
Charlie and Mac walked out of the mall and entered a circular plaza. A few pigeons random flew around. Charlie then saw a kiosk and spotted something.
"Hey man, check it out. Looks like they're selling some pretty cool looking local drink. I think we should check it out." said Charlie, pointing to a snowball stand.
"Ok" said Mac
They walked up to the snowball stand and looked at the menus.
"Man, what are those." said Mac
"I don't know, but I think I want the raspberry." said Charlie.
"Ok, I get the banana one." said Mac
"Ok, we want one raspberry and one banana, of whatever that thing is." said Mac
"What size." asked the clerk
"Um, medium." said Mac
"Two medium snowballs coming up." said the clerk
The merchant then filled two 16 oz clear plastic cups, filled them with ice, and pour some type of syrup. Charlie and Mac slowly sipped their drinks and continued walking.
"Man, those are pretty good." said Charlie
"I know right." said Mac
"Hey, check this out. They even have a World Trade Center here." continued Mac, pointing to a tall building.
"Yeah, ok, lets check it out." said Charlie, as they cut across the grass and entered the building, ignoring a "please don't walk on the grass" and a "no foods or beverages inside" signs. There was a lobby on the first floor, two escalators on each side, and an elevator door on their right.
"Dude, we should probably take an elevator and see where it takes us." said Mac
Charlie and Mac then got into an elevator and went to the highest floor possible. Unfortunately, they were only half way up to the top, so they got out. There was another set of elevators that required a special key to continued going up.
"Dude, I think we should keep going up." said Mac
"Yeah, ok, but I don't think we're allowed further up." said Charlie as a business man in a suit and tie walked towards it and turned the key.
Charlie and Mac ran after the elevator as the businessman saved it from closing.
"Where are you guy's headed." asked the businessman
"Um, um. We're here for a job interview. For um, a car insurance company." lied Charlie, thinking on his feet, clearly under-dressed for a job interview.
"25th floor." said Mac, thinking on his feet, seeing as that was the highest floor.
"Its for Digi-Calc-Insurance Corporation. They're a tech company that uses special calculations for insurances and various lawyerings." said Charlie
The businessman, half-listening, busy with his own problems, either didn't notice or didn't care the blatantly, poorly constructed lie.
"Good luck to you gentlemen." said the businessman as he got off on the 20th floor.
"Man, what was that." asked Mac
"Dude, I told him its for a tech company, since we're dressed like tourists, so he won't get suspicious. I mean we do look like Mack Zack-zing-bergs." said Charlie, butchering the Facebook founder's name.
"That was good thinking." said Mac
They got on the highest floor and got out. They were in some sort of a lobby waiting area with a really fancy suite. Several businessmen milled around. The walls had very pretty and expensive art; paintings, sculptures, some other novelty items. The lobby area had huge windows, and several seats outside, giving way to a bird's view of the city. Even someone like Mac and Charlie appreciated the view and beauty of the city. They spent about and hour and a half looking at various landmarks, talking selfies of themselves looking at the city, and selfish with the art work. They had a blast until they got bored about after an hour and a half and decided to get back to the elevators.
They rode down to the lowest floor possible and got out. They took some more selfies out of another window, plus some more artwork until they got bored with that, and got back to the original elevator. As the door was closing, a woman yelled "save the elevator" from a distance.
Mac, confused, not knowing what she meant for a second, then stopped the elevator from closing as the last second as she got in.
"How yall doing" the woman asked
"We're doing awesome." said Charlie with a dumb grin on his face, as they rode all the way down.
They exited out the elevator quickly, and turned towards the exit as the woman walked out behind them. Out from the direction of where the 1st floor lobby stood, a man yelled out at them.
"Hey, how'd the interview go." asked the man they've seen before, chit chatting with one of the receptionists at the lobby.
At the same time, talking over each other
"Um, um. I didn't..." – Charlie
"I don't think they're a good fit for us." - Mac
"I am sorry to hear that gentlemen" said the man at the lobby
"Oh man, that was close." said Charlie, as they walked out.
They walked out and walked about a block or two, until they came across the Aquarium and the iMax Theater. After some minor back and forth, they decided on the Aquarium and walked in. A group of young school children, all amazed at what they saw as their field trip ended; walked out pasted them. Charlie and Mac looked at the tour prices, and bought the cheapest package available.
As they went in, they visited all the various sea creatures. Charlie was making funny faces at the fish and a turtle.
"Oh man, look at that turtle, he looks like thinking something very wise. He looks like an old wise man." said Charlie
"Yeah, he kinda does." said Mac
"That would be so cool if we had one as a pet." said Charlie
"Yeah, ok, but where the hell are we gonna get a turtle from." asked Mac
"Well, I mean I am sure we can catch one or something." said Charlie
"bbreeeahhhhhh" said a Pigeon as a walrus stole his lunch and swam away.
"Oh my God did you seee that." said Mac
"I know right. That was pretty cool." said Charlie
Charlie and Mac continued their adventure, checking out exotic animals and taking more pictures until their tour ended after about an hour, as they headed out.
"Oh man, we had so much fun." said Mac
"I know right. I mean we got to see the real city, not the tourist bullshit, man. The real New Orleans. I am so glad we ditched Dee and Dennis." said Charlie and they continued walking, and randomly took a right and walked across street car tracks.
"Man, this is the real deal. You can't get more authentic than that." said Mac
"Oh cool, look, check it out." said Charlie, pointing ahead towards Bourbon Street.
""Oh sweet" said Mac, excited.