"Fight me!" "You're like three feet tall, stop telling people to fight you."

Santana stood fuming in the hall as she waited for Brittany. Coach Sylvester had called for them and Santana only had one guess as to why.

She may or may not have recently gotten involved with a certain endangered white rhino that began with a shouting match and ended with someone being thrown against a wall of lockers.

"Hey San." Brittany greeted, her high pony bouncing with every step as she approached.

"Hi." Santana mumbled, only somewhat eased by her girlfriend's presence.

Brittany bumped their hips together, settling in close, "You still pissed?"

"Furious." She answered with the roll of her eyes before turning towards Brittany in a whirl of anger, "She started it, Britt, so why am I the only one getting called to the office? It's fucking stupid."

"I know." Brittany sighed, fingers dancing along Santana's crossed arms, "But hey, you're not alone. I'm here too."

Santana smiled softly.

"Sandbags, get in here!" Sue yelled from her office.

Santana rolled her eyes again, "If I get kicked off the team because of that bitch, I swear I will go all-"

"Come on." Brittany chuckled, nudging the worked up Latina towards the door.

Santana tried to hold her head high and keep her composure as she lead the way, always finding Sue's office a little daunting. Well, except for that one time she and Brittany snuck in after school hours and had a quickie on the desk.

Santana smiled at the memory; good times, good times.

"Wipe that smug grin off your face, Tweedle Fake Boobs, and sit down." Sue demanded, "You too Tweedle Dumb."

Brittany frowned, she didn't think she was smiling too.

"Do you know why I've called you in here?" Sue asked, taking off her reading glasses and setting them on the desk. Her glare shifted between the two, taking in their silence as a no. "Apparently, someone has gotten into another fight."

Santana looked down guiltily, but Brittany nudged her foot with her own; a silent 'keep your head up'.

"Although I applaud you for not being afraid to get your hands dirty, I really admire a girl that uses her fists instead of words, I can't condone fighting. At least, not on school property. I don't know what has gotten into you lately, Lopez, but you're really starting to look like bottom of the pyramid material. You're acting out in classes other than Glee Club and you're skipping which I don't really care about since it's not Cheerios practice, but now you're fighting."

Santana huffed and crossed her arms over her chest, looking out the window.

"Picking on Finn in the hallway is one thing because it's hilarious and he probably deserved it, but going head on wit the Magic School Bus on the wrestling team? Have you completely lost it? That girl could crush you in an instant. She did crush you in an instant."

"She did not." Santana feigned offense, "I was just getting started until, Bieste intervened."

"Intervened?" Sue laughed, "I saw her with my own two eyes carrying you over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes which she probably devours every evening for dinner. Are you questioning my eyesight? I haven't blinked in seven years!"

Santana slumped back in her chair; everyone in the hall had seen Zizes kick her ass.

"Cheerios are winners." Sue continued in a somewhat softer tone, "I coach winners and I don't want to have to remove you from my team, Sandbags. I like you, I like your viciousness but if you're going to pick fights with the losers and nerds, I need you to actually win."

Santana nodded in understanding, "I hear you, coach, I'll try to tone it down."

"Tone it down?" Sue gasped as she rose to her feet, "No. I'm enlisting you in this new program I'm starting so you can hone your skill. Sue Sylvester's Female Fight Club. That's the one time I'm saying it aloud because we obviously can't speak about it so hopefully you're listening. You've got guts and I need someone like you on the team. Meetings are held on Tuesday nights, speak to Mac about where to go."

Santana's eyes went wide and her jaw dropped, "A fight club?"

"Quiet! Ears are everywhere." Sue snapped.

"Brittany's sitting right here.."

"I know, but there's a 90% chance she wasn't listening."

Brittany's brows furrowed as she leaned forward, "Santana can't join a fight club-"

"Does no one understand the concept of keeping it a secret?!"

Santana and Brittany looked to each other, eyes filled with worry.

"Coach, I really don't think I need it." Santana said simply.

"Of course you do!" Sue answered, "You can't just yell out 'Fight Me' me to anyone and not be able to fight back. Remember, I said I only coach winners!"

Brittany shook her head, choosing now to speak up, she looked to Santana, "You're like three feet tall, Santana, you can't keep yelling 'Fight Me' like that."

Santana melted at the serious tone Brittany took on, she loved that she wasn't afraid to tell her like it is, but also a little embarrassed. She was way taller than 3 feet.

Still, she needed to figure out what to do, what to say. She apparently needed to work on her fighting skills and she couldn't lose her spot on the Cheerios, but joining a fight club? What the hell?

"Okay, this is crazy." Santana finally answered, "I'm not joining your fight club. I'm pretty sure that's illegal and I'm not into that, I've got a reputation to keep. So I'll do you a favor, I'll stick to vicious words rather than getting physical."

"You call that a favor?"

"Yes-"

"Think about it, Coach." Brittany cut in, "Cheerios are pretty and Santana's beautiful. Don't you want her to stay that way? If she starts competitive fighting, there's a chance she'll get roughed up. How do you explain a Cheerio with a black eye?"

Sue pondered the idea as she sat down, "Tweedle Dumb, that's not a half bad excuse."

"Thanks?"

"Forget I ever mentioned the fight club and no more fighting, Lopez." Sue instructed, "Now get the hell out of my office!"

Santana and Brittany quickly shuffled out and didn't speak until they were safe in the hallway.

"I can't believe you almost joined a fight club!" Brittany gasped, "I mean, picturing you all sweaty in your work out bra and those tiny black shorts?"

Santana blushed and bumped her girlfriend out of her daze, "Thanks for bailing me out."

"Violence doesn't solve anything." Brittany shrugged, "Plus, I don't want you to get hurt."

"Yeah.." Santana mumbled as they walked to their next class. Suddenly she remembered, "Hey Britt?"

"Yeah?"

"You don't really think I'm that short?" Santana asked as Brittany began smiling, " Like I'm an average height, right? Right, Britt? Britt? Why aren't you answering me?"