Chapter 136: Purgatory In The Living Realm
{A/N: Here's another bonus chapter that takes place after Severus Snape is murdered by Harry Potter...}
My Thanks To All My Readers And Reviewers...Enjoy-S.S
{"Crowded streets all cleared away...One by one...Hollow heroes separate...As they run...You're so cold...Keep your hand in mine...Wise men wonder while...Strong men die...Show me how it ends...It's alright...Show me how defenseless...You really are...Satisfied and empty inside...That's alright...Let's give this another try...If you find your family...Don't you cry...In this land of make believe...Dead and dry...You're so cold...But you feel alive...Lay your hands on me...One last time..."}So Cold, Breaking Benjamin
Unknown Location, Unknown World...
From the moment his obsidian eyes opened, Severus Sebastian Snape had known he had been well removed from the world of the living. The strange icy coldness that surrounded him had been more biting than the coldest winter he could remember enduring back in Cokeworth, or even Hogwarts for that matter. The last thing he recalled had been the intense feeling of pain beyond that of his most vivid nightmares seeping from every portion of his body and the blood...there was blood spilling from the magically inflicted gashes along his abused and battered body. He had already been quite weak from the brutal beating he suffered at the hands of the despot Voldemort for his "failure" to secure Hogwarts before the coup was staged. The result of having two high ranking death eaters wiped out in the wake of the ordeal further enraged the dark lord. Once he had escaped the cell he had been trapped in before the assault on the Fortress Of solitude, Snape had been of the mind to find his wife.
The images of Hermione in the middle of combat casting hexes and curses alike given that the dark lord had made them temporarily legal had been something he never could have imagined in his wildest of dreams. The witch was simply magnificent the way she moved about the battlefield, almost as graceful as he had been when in the middle of combat. It was something of a rare treat to see her so in her element, the glint behind her amber eyes unmistakable and very telling of her Gryffindor nature in that regard.
He had smiled ruefully as he too entered the battle between death eaters and the Order of Phoenix. He knew he had not been welcome among either, but that had not mattered to him. All that mattered to him was his wife and their future together that depended upon this battle coming to an end. Snape had been at the mercy of either side as he moved spelling death eaters left and right in a bid to get to Hermione.
The Potions Master had been out of commission for quite a while in the wake of Voldemort's assault, now here he was hexing death eaters with his brilliant young wife. She had not known about the abuse he suffered but she had been worried about him none the less. If no one else had been grateful to the dour wizard for his service, she always would be and planned to show him just how much once they were done with all the fighting.
Snape caught sight of a death eater aimed at hexing Hermione and blasted him into a nearby stone wall breaking his spine on impact and rendering him unconscious. Hermione looked up at him, her amber eyes grateful to note the familiar sight of his battle weary face.
"Severus." she had said.
He loved the way she said his name, more so than he had when she said in within the confines of their private bedroom.
Snape recalled the heaviness of his muscles and the ache from the numerous wounds but it mattered little to him in her presence. All he needed was to finish the rest of the battle.
A great sense of relief filled him once Potter engaged the despot effectively killing him following a brief struggle. The pain from the mark fading had been excruciating but worth it as the now severely weakened wizard continued to do battle. All of the fighting had come to an end at last. The final image he had recalled was seeing the look of absolute horror spread across Hermione's tear stained face as he found he couldn't move his body.
She caught him, just before he hit the ground and held him close to her.
There was ringing in his ears and the tears kept coming as she attempted to will him to hold on until they could figure out how to save him. The first onset of coldness had been rather numbing as more of his blood seeped from the open wounds and she became covered in it.
The look in her eyes as he gasped for breath that did not come, the fears of those around her as he slowly slipped away had been almost palpable. This wasn't due to his battle with the despot, nor any real enemy on the field...this was due to Potter. Snape had been enraged at the thought that he had survived this long only to be taken out by a sniveling brat with no concept of anyone's feelings aside from his own. A brat whom he had risked his life time and time again to save only to be betrayed in the end.
"Hermione." said Snape closing his eyes as the spell too hold.
The last thing he felt had been her warmth and tears as she held him close. Then he awoke to find himself in this, cold place no where near the land of the dead and far from the land of the living.
"Hermione." said The Potions Master, getting to his feet in the strangely surreal world of purple hues and bright white lights.
He wasn't dead.
That much he knew for sure.
The spell had been successful, but it had rendered him in a kind of spirit-like state. The rage in him had subsided as a new coldness seemed to fill him unlike that of what he had experienced before.
In this place, of darkness and light being on the cusp of each other but never touching, Severus Snape found himself watching as his young wife slowly descended into the woman of coldness he had seen in his dreams. Initially, he believed it to be due to his actions, but the truth had been evident that she became this way due to his murder at the hands of her own best friend.
"Hermione." he said unable to reach her.
This place had been a true hell as he noted her bitterness and rage from the outside looking in. She was becoming like him and that had not been at all what he wanted for her.
Trapped in this place due to his weakened condition, Snape attempted to contact her through all the means he could think of only to find she had closed herself off to him.
Before long she had given birth to their only son, Phaeron but it did little to change her cold heart.
As the years went by in this timeless place, Snape had not changed and his sadness only grew until he had been desperate to make contact and his low magic enable it, but only via a dream.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
The Snape Residence, Muggle World...
A sleeping Hermione Snape had been none the wiser as she found herself pulled from the realm of dreams into the shapeless world where Severus Snape had been. He had appeared exhausted but had been unable to sleep. His eyes were heavy and his expression sullen from years of sorrow when watching her and Phaeron from afar.
The amber eyed witch glared at the wizard she had loved so deeply.
"Hermione." he said unsure if he had been able to get through to her.
"Why have you come here?" she asked seemingly embittered. "After all these years, all the questions...never once did you reply to me and now...now that I've learned to live without you here you are."
"It was not my intention to leave you." said Snape sadly. "I've been trying to get through to you for years...it seems I can only manage this for so long."
"I can't do this." said Hermione coldly. "I need to focus on Phaeron and the real world...I can't afford to get caught up in missing you again."
Her words had been blunt but honest.
They were the kind of words that would have fallen from his harsh pale lips in the old days.
"What's happened to you?" he asked confused at her reaction to him.
Hermione closed her eyes not knowing any easy way to convey her meaning.
"I grew up." she replied honestly.
"This isn't anything that has to do with maturity." he said. "Why are you so cold...even to the boy...what has our son done to deserve your bitterness?"
Hermione almost burst into tears upon his mention of Phaeron.
"Our son will be fine." she said steeling herself against her emotions.
"He is a boy Hermione, he still needs to know he can get compassion from his mother." said Snape meeting her eyes with his own blunt honesty. "I know you are angry..."
"What could you possibly know about how I feel Severus?" she said angrily. "You've been dead going on eight years now."
Snape hadn't believed it once she had said it.
"E-Eight years?" he said shaken.
He had lost eight years of his life thanks to Harry Potter.
"I am sorry that this has caused you so much pain." he said meeting her eyes.
"I don't need your pity Severus." said Hermione coldly. "I've managed just fine without anyone's pity as a matter of fact and I will continue to do so."
Snape did not know what to make of his wife at this point. It was abundantly clear that she was not one for sentiment, not even as far as he was concerned.
"I love you witch." he said knowing all too well he'd never be able to get passed the wall she put up around her heart in one conversation.
"And I will always love you Severus." replied Hermione meeting his eyes. "But you and I both know this is a waste of time...what we had was what gave us Phaeron...but you are dead and life goes on."
"Life." he said embittered in his own right. "Life isn't fair."
"No." agreed Hermione seemingly just as embittered as he was. "it isn't."
"You've accomplished a great deal in my absence." he said breaking the silence that fell between them. "Especially where the boy is concerned."
"Did you really expect anything less?" asked Hermione folding her arms across her chest.
"No...can't say that I did." he replied with a sad smirk.
Hermione met his eyes for the last time as he found himself reaching for her. She pulled away not wishing to endure his touch for need of it later and never having it.
"I am sorry." he apologized. "My intention was to make up for my wrongdoings against you and I ended up hurting you all over again."
"I've forgiven you Severus." replied Hermione in a business-like tone. "That's all that matters...but now you have to understand that I have a life to get back to...and as much as it pains me to say it, it does not include you."
"So this is what it's like to be in hell." he muttered. "Not being able to hold you or our son not even once...but having to watch you struggle in darkness with no way to comfort either of you."
"Severus." began Hermione.
She noticed the tears streaming down the sallow pale cheeks of the wizard whom had been her husband prior to his murder at the hands of Harry Potter.
"It seems even here I am doom to be punished for my transgressions no matter how much I attempted to make up for them in the past." he said growing even more weary than a dead man should in the wake of his own words.
"For the sake of our son, we have to let each other go." she said not wishing to get caught up in her feelings for him again.
Snape nodded knowing all too well that she had been right. There was nothing he could do for her or the boy now anyway it was only right that he release her from this place despite only being able to see her from a distance.
"You have my heart witch, even when it isn't beating." he said.
Hermione simply nodded before finding herself awakening in her bed.
Snape sighed looking at her one last time before making his way back to the realm from whence he came. If this was his hell then he'd endure it like always, the little comfort he had was that he had given Hermione a son before he was imprisoned in this place and little Phaeron proved to be quite a gifted little wizard.
The weary Potions Professor took a small bit of comfort in the knowledge that his family had been safe and thriving despite the tragedy that befell them and he was able to watch every moment as if he had been there despite the distance between them. Slowly accepting his fate, Snape had remained there in the strange place watching them for years. Sharing moment after moment despite his in ability to contact them directly. The Potions Master had been saddened to note that Hermione began taking Dreamless Draught in a bid to keep from dreaming of him.
Despite Snape not being dead, Harry Potter had indeed managed to take his life from him.