As you may recall, Ray used my comment to his mother about curtains as a previous chapter title. I chose the word curtains as the title of this chapter for two reasons. First, because it covers that same section of the narrative, and second, because "curtains" is a reference to an ending, death or, in this case, goodbyes. We say goodbye to a few people in this chapter.

I hope you find my perspective interesting.

Chapter Thirty-six: Curtains

I spent the evening packing. Then I used up some of my perishables in making dinner. If I couldn't use them all by the time we left, I would give them to Ms. Tate or other tenants. Which reminded me, I hadn't seen the landlady or thought to ask RayK if he had asked about vacant apartments on RayV's behalf. As it turned out, I would not remember to do so before we left.

I heard someone arrive at Ray's apartment and thought I recognized Francesca's voice. Dief whining by the door confirmed it: he'd scented one of his favorite people.

"We weren't invited," I told Deif.

"Hm."

"Well, it's none of our business what they're doing. If they want us to join them, they'll tell us."

He waited by the door for about an hour, until I heard voices again and the door closing. Two pairs of feet walked away down the hall. Ray was probably taking his guest home.

Dief sulked.

"There's no reason for you to be so put out," I said. I was a bit curious myself, though. I thought that Francesca was likely the friend Ray had said he would help with something, and it seemed unusual for her to ask for his help with anything.

I tried to put Ray's visitor out of my mind and sat down to work out our route to Gjoa Haven. I was certain my sister would be glad to see us if we came to pick up the dogsled from her. Inuvik was a little out of our way, but I thought Ray would, as I did, find it worth the extra miles. Once we'd visited there for a day or so, we would make our way to Nunavut and then on to King William Island.

I heard him come back a little later, and opened my door to find him in the hallway. "Ah, you're back," I said.

Instead of saying where he had been, Ray said, "Yeah. I'm back. You want something?"

I shook my head nonchalantly. When Ray stared at me, I amended, "Well, over an hour ago, Dief began expressing his desire to visit you, and I heard voices coming from across the hall. I could be mistaken, but the second voice sounded like Francesca's, and that would explain Dief's eagerness, since she often gives him snacks."

"You know what?"

I shook my head again.

"It's none of your business who I have over."

"Right you are."

Dief looked up at Ray with doleful eyes.

"Nosy mutt," Ray grumbled.

I cleared my throat. "Anyway, I've prepared a tentative itinerary."

I told him the plans I had made, and he had plenty to say about them. But we finally agreed, more or less, on our travel route. We also agreed that I would contact officials at Gjoa Haven once we had told Ray's parents our plan in the morning. He looked as if he were dreading that conversation.

"What's this all about, Stanley? I know you didn't get me and your mother over here to join you and your partner for brunch." Damian had been acting agitated since he and Barbara arrived, and he finally bubbled over.

"Well, no," Ray admitted. "Fraser, you wanna tell them?"

I hadn't expected Ray to hand the entire explanation over to me, but I was determined not to let him down. I cleared my throat and Damian looked at me, back at Ray, then at his wife. He looked very uncertain and uneasy, as if he thought bad news was coming.

Just as I was about to begin, Damian said, "Isn't this maybe something you should tell us, son?"

"I think Fraser can explain it better," Ray said, eyes downcast.

"I'm not so sure about that."

"With all due respect, sir," I said, "you can't expect to judge my capability on an unknown subject."

Damian sighed and put his face in his hands, leaning on the bar. "Fine. Just hurry it up."

"Damian, give them a chance," said Barbara.

I endeavored to explain as quickly and succinctly as I could, in order to alleviate Damian's worries, whatever they were.

"You're going back?" Barbara asked, obviously concerned.

"That's it?" said Damian, not looking satisfied.

"Y-yeah... that's it," Ray confirmed.

"Isn't it enough?" said Barbara.

"Well... sure," Damian said, looking like he was just catching up with the rest of us. "I mean, we just found out you were home and you're talking about leaving again. That's certainly enough."

"What did you think it was going to be?" Ray asked.

"I didn't know. It's just that... well, you remember your friend Jamar?"

I hadn't heard of Jamar before, unless Ray had told me and I'd forgotten. Which, I must admit, is possible.

"Yeah... he pretty much saved my life on the playground... more than once. He got me into boxing and he taught me to talk street. How could I not remember Jamar? We were like brothers."

I knew I would have to ask more about this person later. He was obviously very special to Ray, and he was sure to have good stories about the two of them.

"Right. Well... there were times when I wondered if the two of you... if you were..."

I waited, baffled.

"What, Dad? Just say it!" Ray exclaimed angrily.

Suddenly, I thought I knew. And whether I was right or not, I didn't think this was a conversation I should be listening to. I looked at Ray's mother, who seemed upset. "Missus Kowalski, er, Barbara, I'd like your opinion on some curtains I purchased for my apartment. Uh, shall we...?"

I led her out of the apartment, leaving Ray and his father alone. "The, uh... the walls are a dull beige color, and I'm not sure how best to brighten the room," I explained, ushering her into my apartment.

Dief danced around us, curious about the sudden departure.

I went to stand by the living room window. "What do you think?" I asked, pulling out the newly hung curtain.

She looked for a moment as if she didn't know what to say. "Benton," she said at last, "it's very sweet of you to make an excuse to let Stanley and his father talk alone."

"Oh, it's not just an excuse. I truly would value your opinion," I assured her. "And I recommend that you start calling him Ray when you're away from him. It will help you remember when you're with him."

She nodded. "You are a good man. A good friend for our boy. I'm very glad he has you. I never really thought there was anything... romantic going on between the two of you, but I thought if there were, Ray would tell us in his own time. And that's what I told Damian, too..."

She paused as Ray's voice rose across the hall, climaxing in the words "I do not wanna make out with him, for god's sake!"

At least that confirmed that my suspicions had been correct. I watched her face, ready to tailor my reaction to hers.

She sighed. "We are religious people, but we haven't been very... devout, I guess you'd say, in recent years. I know that certain beliefs are still important to both Damian and me, but I also know that we both love our son unconditionally." A tear ran down her face. "We could never stop loving him, no matter what he chose to do. Damian can hold a grudge, but it doesn't mean he doesn't love him."

I fetched some tissues for her. "I can see that you both love him very much," I said soothingly. "And I can tell he loves you, too. He speaks fondly of you both."

She smiled and wiped her eyes. "I wish Damian hadn't brought it up this way... but since it seems to be important to him, I also wish they'd talked it out a long time ago."

"That might have been better," I said, "but I find it's best to focus on what has happened, rather than on what might have happened."

"Yes, that's wise. I'm sorry, but no one's asked you how you feel about all this."

I shook my head. "I think it's safe to say that Ray and I have a mutual regard for one another. I'm not offended by your husband's assumptions. But I do feel that if they offended him, he certainly should not have waited so long to make it known. But again... that's in the realm of what might have happened."

"Mm."

Things had gotten very quiet next door.

Barbara looked at my curtains again. "I think something in more of a sky blue would be nice," she commented. "Perhaps with a subtle floral pattern."

I smiled. "I knew you'd have the answer. Let's rejoin the others."

We crossed the hall and I knocked softly on Ray's door. After a moment, he opened it.

"Your mother has been an admirable help with the curtains," I said. "Would you like us to rejoin you now, or do I have time to discuss sheets with her?"

Ray grabbed me by the epaulette and tugged me toward himself. "Get in here, you freak."

I knew by this time that Ray used the term "freak" to refer to the many ways in which we were different, and it passed almost for a term of endearment.

The air still seemed tense, but gradually the tension dissipated. I did my best to assure both of Ray's parents that we would be safe in our travels and come back before long. I was glad Damian shook my hand when they left. His grip was strong, and so was mine. There would be no grudge between us on either side, and we both knew it. I hoped I would get to spend more time with them after the trip.

"I knew they'd understand," I told Ray when they were gone.

He sighed. "Sure... but only because it wasn't nearly as horrible as what my dad thought was going on."

I objected to his exaggeration. "Oh, Ray."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Certainly."

He asked if I had always known he was straight, and after bringing up the 'Do you find me attractive' conversation, I pointed out how easily distracted he was by all things feminine.

"I'll be in the middle of explaining something to you, a woman will go through your line of sight, and I'll know I've lost you."

"Nuh-uh!"

I decided to go ahead and stoop to his level. "Yuh-huh."

Dief barked.

"Like you're any better," Ray snapped at him. He looked back at me. "You know the one time I doubted your straightness? Two words for you: buddy breathing."

I pointed out how unlikely it was that I would ever kiss him, even if I thought we were going to die. "More likely a salute," I concluded.

Ray snorted. "Yup, that sounds like you."

I felt a little warm in my uniform and I realized that even though I'm an open-minded person, the conversation had not left me completely unaffected by embarrassment. Still, I was glad we had talked openly about it all. I decided that was a good time to gently reprimand Ray for the way he inappropriately poked fun at his suspects. He argued at first, but then seemed to agree that he sometimes took things too far.

"Well, um... what do we do now? About our travel plans, I mean."

"Now I put in a call to Gjoa Haven."

Which I did. It took some time to get through, but it was time well-spent. The wheels set in motion, we could finally make solid plans for our departure.

"We're going back to Canada," Ray said.

His declaration seemed to finally make it official. I was really going home again, if only for a short time. And one of my best friends was going with me. I felt my mouth involuntarily stretch into a smile. It felt good.

Ray drove me to the consulate where my assignments for the day were quite light. I took the opportunity to discuss my vacation time with Inspector Lam while Ray went to fetch our lunch. The inspector seemed to have mixed feelings about it, but he could hardly object, since he had insisted on my taking at least two weeks' vacation time that year.

Over lunch, I brought up Ray's friend Jamar, and he promised to introduce us should the opportunity arise. We discussed street lingo some more after I suggested that Jamar might be able to help me with it. Ray said it wasn't something one could learn from a lesson or two. He wouldn't even let me take notes on his definitions. It seemed I could find no shortcuts, and I was eager to learn at a faster rate than he was willing to teach.

"Fraser, you trust me?"

I didn't know why he was asking, but I answered, "Implicitly. Surely you know that."

"Well, yeah. Or I would if I could remember what implicitly means."

I smiled. "In this instance, 'without qualification or reserve.'"

"That's what I thought."

He didn't give any reason for his question, and I decided not to ask.

When we were done, Ray drove us to the precinct so we could inform Lt. Welsh and our friends of our plans. RayV objected strongly to them at first, but gradually stopped arguing and started giving cautions and advice.

Detective Huey drew me aside to tell me he and his partner had hoped I would sing their song of choice for Francesca. I assured them that Turnbull would be more than happy to sing it for them, knowing that for me to sing to Francesca after telling her my intentions toward her might upset her very badly. I did, however like the country music genre, so I offered them a song recommendation for which they thanked me.

When we had RayV convinced to let us go without further argument, he asked, "When are you leaving?"

I had not yet told RayK the time of our flight. I looked at him, a little worried that he might object, but we couldn't waste any time. "First thing in the morning, partner?" I asked.

He took a deep breath and then nodded solemnly.

RayV left his desk to give us his admonishments to be careful, for RayK to listen to me on matters of terrain and climate, and to make sure I didn't lick anything that could hurt me. (Side note: RayV seemed to think I shouldn't be licking anything that wasn't fresh food, but it was RayK who saved me from being electrocuted by licking the wrong thing.)

"Don't forget to come back," he told me. I thought he looked as if he half wished he could come with us, but he knew he was needed in Chicago.

"I won't," I promised.

He hugged both of us. RayK told him to take care of "our family." I knew he was speaking strictly of the Vecchios, not his own parents.

Then RayK took Francesca down the hall, and I felt sure he was going to tell her his intentions. I silently wished him a favorable outcome.

"Those two an item?" RayV asked me quietly when they were out of sight. "She was out with him again last night."

I shook my head. "I don't believe so—not yet. But they could be by the time they come back."

"Should I be worried?"

"As much for Ray as for Francesca."

He smiled a little. "Gonna miss you."

"I know. I wish you could come along."

"Well... hell, not me," he said, not quite succeeding in sounding careless. "I've seen enough of the frozen North. You can have it. Long as you come back in one piece. Well, the two of you, so two pieces."

Francesca hugged me when she and RayK came back to us. I couldn't tell for sure what had happened between them. "Take care of him," she whispered to me before letting go and turning to RayK. She whispered something to him as well, but I was careful not to listen.

Then we left. I felt a little regretful to leave our friends, even for only two weeks, but I was very excited to be on our way. I let out some of my enthusiasm by singing a sample of the country song I'd recommended to Huey and Dewey for Ray, but he soon tired of it, so I stopped.

When we got home, Ray went to pack and I called the airport to confirm our flight. I heard his cell phone ring shortly before I got done. He was speaking in a low voice. I decided to tidy his kitchen a little to keep from accidentally listening in.

As I was washing out his coffee pot, he emerged and told me the call had been from RayV, who wanted him to see Mrs. Vecchio before leaving. I thought that was a good idea, since the last time she had seen us, RayK had been rather out of favor. So, once I figured out how to program his coffee maker, we left for the Vecchio house.

Ray apologized to his surrogate mother again for what had happened on our last visit, and she quickly dismissed the incident with a thinly veiled warning that nothing of the sort should ever happen again. After that, she was all concern for our safety, and ended up giving Ray a St. Christopher medal that had been her husband's. When she said she was sorry she didn't have another for me, I told her I was sure to be safe if Ray was. I didn't intend to let him out of my sight.

Thank you for reading. As usual, feedback is much appreciated. Thank you kindly. ~B. Fraser