APRIL - THEO

People say you find out who your real friends are when you get pregnant. That the fake ones will pare away, and you'll be left with a core group that will never leave your side.

Standing in front of my mirror, turned to the side with my shirt pulled up, I wonder how much truth that holds for me. I don't plan on telling anyone about my baby, not even its father. This was all my fault, and I can handle the damage it'll bring on my own.

I sigh and skim my hand over my belly, pushing it out just to see what it'll look like. I can't imagine myself pregnant; it doesn't seem real. I know it is, though. The bucket of vomit I keep under my bed and wash out every night proves just how real it is. I'm three months along, but you'd never know.

Tonight, I'm supposed to go to a house party with Jackson and his teammates, and girls from my squad will be there, too. I've already fabricated the lie to my parents, who took long enough to deliberate whether or not it was okay to sleep over at Lexie's. Luckily, they finally caved and let me go, and judging by the time I should be out the door by now.

I readjust my shirt and trudge to my closet to change clothes. I'm exhausted, which isn't new, but I don't feel like pushing through it tonight. I don't have an excuse for Jackson, though, who's been looking forward to this party for a week now. I know he wants me there, I can't blow him off.

So, I get changed into a pair of jeans and a cardigan, then curl my hair lacklusterly. I put a bit of makeup on, nothing that my parents will notice, but just enough, then go downstairs.

"I'm leaving for Lexie's," I say, slinging my backpack over one shoulder. Given the fact they assume I'll be gone all night, I get to sleep over at Jackson's. That's a plus, at least.

There are noises of approval from the other room, and I leave out the front door. I get in my car and drive to his house, where we'll carpool together.

"Hey," he says, coming down the stairs while I walk in. "What's up?"

I shrug and toss my backpack down. I don't like being moody towards him, but lately it's been happening more often than not. He's the closest person, and my favorite to blame. It is his child inside me, making me feel like this.

"Nothing," I say.

"Alright," he says, coming closer.

I don't look up and make eye contact, though; instead, I lean against the wall and stare at the floor with my arms crossed.

"Peach," he says. "What's going on?"

"I said nothing," I snap, widening my eyes.

"Okay then," he says, backing off. He starts to put his shoes on and kneels to tie them, then I speak again.

"I just don't wanna go to this stupid party," I say.

The foul mood didn't exactly come from nowhere, but I had no idea it was going to rear its ugly head like this. Jackson is surprised, too, looking up with a bewildered expression on his face.

"Uh, well I already told them we'd be there in five," he says.

"I know," I spit back. "I'm gonna go. I'm just telling you that I don't want to."

"You can stay here, if you want," he says. "You don't have to go. I put new sheets on the bed today, you could just go upstairs and rest. It's cool if you don't wanna be there."

"I'm not gonna stay here alone," I say. "That's weird."

"It's not weird," he says. "I don't want you to have a bad time."

"I'll be fine," I say, turning my head sharply. "Let's just get it over with."

"Peach, if you're gonna be like this…"

"Be like what?" I snap, hair flying as I look at him. "I told you, I'm going. So, let's just go."

He raises his eyebrows and sighs in defeat, then puts on his coat. He knows it's probably not worth it to continue the conversation, and he'd be right.

We get in the car and sit with icy silence between us. He's not angry, but I still am while vehemently pretending I'm not. We pull up to the house with all the lights on, and I haul my body out of the car and suddenly feel like I weigh a thousand pounds. I don't plan on taking my coat off once we get inside, because I'm sure everyone will stare at me.

"Coming?" he says, extending a hand.

I take it and walk alongside him, saying nothing.

"You sure you're okay?" he asks, unlacing our fingers so he can wind an arm around the small of my back. I let him.

"I'm fine, Jackson," I say.

We go inside and the music is obtrusively loud. I flinch because of it, but the first thing Jackson does is bob his head and high-five a few of his teammates standing near the door.

"J-Man!" they shout, and I raise my lip in disgust at how drunk they already are. "You need a beer!"

Jackson smiles at them, and it's still on his face as he looks to me. "Babe?" he says. "You want a drink?"

"No," I say.

"Oh," he says. "Nah, guys. I don't need one."

"It's fine," I say, eyes wide. "Just have it. I know you want one. You don't have to worry about me."

I push my hair out of my face and know I'm being insufferable, but I can't stop. I'm so angry at everything with no control over my mood, and I have a feeling it'll only get worse.

"April," he says.

"Go have a drink!" I say, nearly commanding him. "You're the one who wanted to be here, so go have fun. I'm going to sit down."

My feet are tired, like they always are. I just want to find the couch and relax, maybe put in headphones to drown out all this noise.

"I'm not gonna go have fun without you," he says, matching my tone. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong!" I say, and contradicting my statement, the tears start flowing. "Just go have fun, Jackson, go!"

"No," he says. "Peach, come on. Let's just leave."

"No," I say, wiping my eyes. "You wanted to be here, so stay. I can go. I'll go home."

"No way," he says, then gently takes my wrist. "Come on, let's go back to the house. We can just go to bed. This seems lame, anyway. They have PBR and they're not even playing good music. Come on, Peachy. Let's leave. I want to leave."

I sniffle and sob loudly, leaning against his side while he leads us out of the buzzing house. Once we're in the sanctity of the car, he takes my hand across the console and strokes my skin; he's always such a calm presence.

"Talk to me," he says.

"It's nothing," I say. "Can we just go home?"

We drive back to his house and I change into the pajamas I brought as soon as we get there. While he gets ready for bed, I lie down and feel sufficiently guilty that I played the emotional girlfriend card and made us leave a party he'd been excited for. I know better than to believe he actually wanted to come home. He did that for me, and he shouldn't have.

When he climbs in, I sigh and freeze when he touches me. I don't deserve it.

"You should go back," I say. "You wanted to be there tonight. I'm fine here. You should go have fun."

"No," he says, then kisses my shoulder.

"Why?"

"Then, I'd miss out on being with you, here in my comfy bed," he says. "This beats any party."

"Stop," I say. "You don't mean that. I was grouchy and evil to you. It's fine to be mad at me."

"I just want you to talk to me," he says. "Tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing's wrong," I say.

"Don't lie," he says.

"I'm not," I say.

He scoffs and holds me close, kissing my shoulder again with his eyes on me. I don't look back, though. I stay staring at the ceiling while wearing a frown.

"If you keep looking like that, your face will get stuck," he says.

I roll my eyes and snort, then try to make the frown fade.

"What is it?" he presses.

He doesn't know the beginning, and he won't. I take a deep breath, buying time for a lie, and say, "It's just PMS. I'm sorry for being a witch."

"Oh," he says, then rubs a hand over my stomach. I turn on my side so he'll stop. "You're a good witch, at least."

I close my eyes and shake my head. No matter what, to him, I can do no wrong. He deserves better.

…

Three months later, I'm crying harder than I've ever cried. I've never felt this alone. It's June, the days are hot, and Jackson is at the pool with our friends. He invited me, but of course I had to turn him down. My belly is bigger now, and hard to hide. Impossible to cover in a swimsuit, so there's no way I could go.

So, instead, I'm sitting alone in my room and crying. I can barely catch my breath with my body folded in half, and I've never been more confused or scared. I don't know where my life is supposed to go from here, or how I can make it on my own.

I throw my head back and stifle the sobs, closing my eyes tight while spreading my fingers out on my belly.

"What are we gonna do?" I ask, stroking the skin. "I don't know what to do. I don't know how to be a mother, I'm still a kid. I don't know. I don't know."

Then, like a response to my plea, something moves in my gut. A flutter at first, then stronger, like the pulsing of wings. My eyebrows furrow together with concern, in fear at first, before I realize what it must be.

The baby is kicking. I'm 24 weeks along, and due to the research I've done online, it's the perfect time to start.

I start crying again after a few seconds of silence, sputtering in disbelief. My baby is inside me, living and thriving. I'm hosting a life,

"Hi," I whisper, looking down at my little bump. "Hi, in there… I'm your mom. And I love you."

My phone chimes a moment later, lit up with a text from Jackson. I glance at the screen and more tears flow as I read it with one hand over the baby he has no idea about.

Peach. Miss u. Love u.

JACKSON - TESSA

"Are you sure you don't want me to go get Big T from school?" I ask April, who's bending with difficulty to grab her purse from the floor. Before she strains something, I hurry to grab it for her.

"I'm fine," she says, pushing her hair behind her shoulders. "It's not far."

"Peach," I say.

"Jackson," she says back, in the same tone. "I'm six months along, not nine. I'm not gonna go into labor picking up our son from school. It's okay, alright?"

I frown a bit. "It's so hot, though," I say. "You know how you get when it's hot."

"Luckily, the car has air conditioning," she says, cheerily.

"Let me come with you," I say.

"Jackson Avery," she says. "If I don't go out and do one thing alone today, I'm going to scream. You know I love you; I love you with everything I have. But you are in my hair, and I need space."

I sigh. She's right. There was a doctor's appointment this morning; one where we found out we're having a little girl, and since then, I haven't given April much room. I bought a book the other day about the ins and outs of pregnancy, and the chapters focusing on what can go wrong have been haunting me since reading it.

"Okay," I say. "Just hurry back, okay?"

"I will not hurry back," she says, laughing over her shoulder.

After she leaves, I sit in the quiet living room and close my eyes to stew. I never got to experience April pregnant with Theo, so this baby has been extremely new and special. The concept of pregnancy is insane; the fact that there's a human inside April, growing within her body, is wild. I can't wrap my head around it.

She's the one doing all the hard work. All I did was come inside her, and now it's all on her. It's the least I can do to worry, to tend to her every beck and call.

It's different for her, though. She's gone through this before. It was a while ago, sure, but it's not brand new and foreign this time. She's had a baby before, carried our beautiful son for nine months. God, she's a masterpiece. She's carrying my second child. How crazy is that?

When April and Theo return, their voices fill the house immediately.

"Where's Dad?" Theo asks.

"Not sure," April answers.

"Living room," I call.

"Daddy!" Theo sings, and I hear footsteps before he shows up around the corner and throws his little body on me.

"Hey, bud," I say. "How was your day?"

"Good," he says. "On the way home, me and Mommy stopped and got ice cream."

"Teddy!" April says, waddling in the path our son had just taken.

"Oops," Theo says. "I wasn't supposed to tell you, I don't think."

"I'm jealous," I say, pretend-scowling at her.

"But I'm in a much better mood now," she says, smiling guiltily.

"Yeah…" I say. "You're still on my list."

…

Later that night, after Theo is tucked into bed, April and I are in the master bathroom. With a toothbrush hanging out of her mouth, she's digging around in the cleaning closet until she comes out holding a bottle of Windex that she proceeds to spray onto the mirror.

"Babe," I say. "Really, right now?"

"It's dirty," she says, spitting toothpaste. "You get flecks of spit on it."

"You do," I say, joking with her as she continues to spritz. "And anyway, should you really be breathing that stuff in? I don't think so."

"Jackson, I'm cleaning," she says, leaning over the counter so her belly rests on it.

"I got it," I say, taking the bottle and paper towel from her. "Go lay down. I'll finish."

"I had it under control," she says.

"It's fine," I say. "Baby bump's in the way, anyway."

She shoots me a scowl, but complies. I finish cleaning the mirror and shut off the lights, then join her in bed.

I climb in and prepare to spoon her with one arm wrapped around the baby, but she flips over before I can and kisses me.

"Oh," I say. "Hello."

She smirks against my lips and holds the side of my face, then opens her mouth against mine. We haven't made out like this in a while, she's been tired lately, so there's no way I'm turning it down.

One of her hands slips down my torso to my groin, and she cups my growing bulge confidently and strokes me with her lips on my neck. Her breathing grows heavier along with mine, but before she can finish me off, she throws one leg over my hips and straddles my waist.

I look up at all her pregnant glory, absolutely floored by how magnificent she is. She's creating life as we speak.

"Baby," she says, then strips her shirt. I stare at her full, round breasts, and she yanks my wrists upwards so I'll get handsy with her. "I'm horny."

She reaches behind her and continues to stroke me, then tries to pull my boxers down. But even as the feeling of her hand on my dick clouds my mind, I can't imagine having sex with this baby in the way. April's fragile, delicate - what if something went wrong?

"Let me eat you out," I say, attempting to adjust her body.

"No," she says, planting her knees firmly. "I want you inside me."

I try to divert the subject without coming out and saying it. "I wanna go down on you," I say, dragging my fingernails over the swell of her stomach. "Come on, baby, let me. You love it when I give you head."

"Not tonight," she says, adamant. "I want this tonight."

I sigh and lick my lower lip, eyes centered on her stomach.

"Jackson," she sighs. "Seriously? Is this why we haven't slept together since I started showing?"

"I…" I try and think of something, but no words come. "Yeah," I admit.

"The baby will be fine," she says. "We just have to make some adjustments. You're not gonna hurt her."

I clear my throat. "But I'm…" I clear it again.

"What, big?" she says, then giggles. "Baby, don't get cocky. It doesn't work like that." She dismounts and lies on her side, faced away with one hand pulled back towards me. "See, just like this. It won't hurt me, or the baby. I'll tell you if I'm uncomfortable, okay? But right now, I just really want you."

It's nearly impossible to resist her, so I don't try any longer. We can make this work.

APRIL - TYBIE

"Yeah," I say, one hand over the dramatic swell of my stomach. "I swear, it just keeps happening. We always wanted a big family, but we never expected it'd be so easy."

Addison nods and laughs, sitting across from me at a cafe. Jackson is looking at the display case full of treats with the kids - Theo is nine, and Tessa two.

"It seems like every time I see you, this baby gets bigger," Addie says, leaning forward. "Can I?"

"Go ahead," I say, reclining. "Don't worry about asking. I'm used to it by now."

She smiles and skims a palm over my shirt, which is stretched tight over my bump. It's early December, and the baby could come any day. Every moment is one I'm waiting for my water to break.

"Hi, in there," she says. "You ready to come out and meet everyone?"

"We're sure ready for you," I say.

"What are you naming her?" Addison asks.

"Tybie," I say.

"That's so interesting," she says. "Where did you think of that?"

I shrug. "Baby name book," I say. "You know, we have the 'T' theme going on. And it's unique, not crazy, but… you know. We liked it."

"It's adorable," she says, then looks at my belly to say, "You're already adorable!"

"Mama! Mama!" Tessa shouts, halfway across the store. She holds up a cookie bigger than her head and waves it around. "Dada got!"

"Wow," I say, nodding. "Why don't you bring that to Mama, and we can split it."

She considers it for a moment, looking between me and the cookie, before shaking her head with a toothy grin. "Mine," she says, and takes a big bite.

"I'll share with you, mommy," Theo says, coming up behind me. He sits on the arm of my chair and breaks his cookie in half, handing the bigger one to me.

"Thanks, teddy," I say, smiling at him.

Jackson walks over with Tessa on his hip, who's gnawing at the cookie like it's the last thing she'll ever eat. "Hey, baby mama," he says, and sits down in a third chair with our toddler on his lap.

"Hey," I say, then let out a long breath. The baby is sitting on my lungs today.

Before long, Tessa finishes her cookie and wriggles to be let down from Jackson's lap. She eyes Theo's unfinished dessert and makes a beeline for him, grappling for it with sticky fingers.

"Mine, mine!" she says, and Theo holds it just out of her reach.

"No!" he says. "You already had yours. This is mine."

"Mine!" she shouts, which is one of her favorite words. "Mine, Bubba!"

"Stop!" he whines, twisting in the opposite direction.

Then, he gets up to run away and she chases after him on her unsteady legs. It doesn't take long before she has a fall, and although it's minor, she erupts in loud wails after she hits the ground.

"Oh, baby," I say, and push myself up from the armrests to get her.

"I got it," Jackson says, extending one hand. "Sit, Peach. I got her."

"Mama!" Tessa cries, still on the floor. "Mama!"

"It's fine, honey," I say, supporting my lower back as I stand. Addison was right, I do get bigger every day. I walk over to Tessa and do my best to kneel and get her back to her feet, and she throws her arms around my neck. "I got you," I say, rubbing her back. "Come on, come sit down."

Somehow, I get her on my hip and we go back to my chair and sit together.

"Mama big belly," Tessa says, bending in half to rest on top of it. I can't help but laugh.

"You're right," I say, taking a deep breath. "Mama has a very big belly. And your little sister's gonna come out of it very soon."

JACKSON - TRISTAN

"Honey, be honest," I hear, coming from the bathroom. "Don't pull any of the 'you're beautiful and glowing and carrying my baby' bullshit. Just lay it out." April steps out of the bathroom and into my field of vision. "Do I look like a fat cow in this?"

I open my mouth to negate what she's said, but she speaks again before I can get a word out.

"I'm not going," she says, throwing her hands up.

"Baby…" I say, getting up to follow her.

"No!" There's a ruckus as I go into the bathroom, then she exclaims, "I can't even get it unzipped!"

"April, stop," I say, finding her and placing my hands on her shoulders. "You look… you're gorgeous. You know no one looks better pregnant than you do."

I turn her to look in the mirror and showcase how beautiful she is. She's wearing a deep purple dress that shows off her full breasts and curvy figure, and most of all, her round stomach. It's late June, and our son is due in September.

"I can't remember the last time I went to one of these not pregnant," she says, then sniffles. "They're all judging us. They don't think we know what contraception is."

"We know…" he says. "We're just-"

"Don't make jokes!" she snaps, and I shut my mouth. I've learned by now. "All those women talk about me behind my back. They're awful, Jackson. I can't go."

She's talking about the gala Theo's school puts on every year that we always attend. It's a fun event, a nice night, and we always enjoy ourselves.

"You weren't pregnant last year," I say.

"I was nursing," she peeps. "I was nursing Tybie."

"And your boobs looked great," I say, hugging her above the bump. "They still do."

"He's a happy accident," she says, now crying. "A happy one. I don't…" She breaks to hiccup-sob. "I don't regret our son. But I just feel so fat, and like these mothers don't think I can do anything besides get knocked up and hold babies on my hip-"

"Hey," I say, frowning. "You have more strength in your pinky finger than they have in their whole bodies. You do more in a day than I could do in a year, Peach, and you know that. Don't get down on yourself, you're amazing."

She wipes her nose and blinks at me, eyes wet and glistening. "Where are the kids," she mutters, meekly. "It's quiet, and Leyla isn't here yet."

Leyla is our go-to babysitter, the kids love her. But April's right, it is eerily quiet downstairs. We'd put a movie on for them while we got ready, but the complete silence is unusual.

"I'll be fine," she says, dabbing at her face. "Let's just go check on them and leave. If I stay here one more second, I'm gonna change my mind."

She leads the way down the stairs and I carefully watch her from behind, guiding her without actually touching her. If I touched her, I might get my head ripped off.

"Jackson, I swear," she says. "If they got into something. If Tybie opened the flour and it's all over the kitchen floor again, I'm going to lose it. Or, if I see Tessa pulling out Theo's hair-"

She stops talking due to the sight in front of us. With the movie playing quietly in the background, the three kids are on the couch, having fallen asleep sitting up. Theo is in the middle with his sisters flanking him - Tybie's head on his lap with Tessa's on his shoulder. Their mouths are open in the exact same way - like April says I sleep - all breathing deeply.

"Oh," she says, and starts to cry for a much different reason than before. "Oh, Jackson. Look at them."

I hug her from the side and kiss her temple firmly. "They're ours," I say. "We made that."

APRIL - TALULAH

"Jackson," I say, propped up by pillows that he surrounds me with. "Call the doctor."

"Why?" he says, looking at me and our brand new baby girl with alarm. "Is she okay?"

"Not that doctor," I say, closing my eyes. "I love our family. You know I do, and I love you. And I love this precious little baby… but you, mister, are getting snipped."

He sits on the edge of the bed, somewhat shocked. "Peach-"

"No, no," I say, gently. I look up at him before my eyes go back to our little girl, our tiny Talulah. "You can 'Peach' me all you want. But you didn't just push a human out of your body for the fifth time. Jackson, I'm in love with all of you, but I can't do this again."

"Peachy."

"Jackson," I say, eyebrows up. "We've tried condoms. We tried birth control. It just doesn't work. We always say it - you look at me wrong while I'm ovulating and another T-baby is on the way. I can't do it again, and I need you to hear me."

We look at each other for a long time, and he finally nods. "I know," he says. "Okay. I'll set up an appointment."

"Thank you," I say, then nuzzle the baby's forehead. "Now, come over here and look at what we made."

He scoots next to us on the bed and holds my shoulders, using his free hand to stroke our newborn's cheek.

"She looks like Tessa," he says. "All the hair."

"And the big head," I say lightly, then kiss his cheek while gazing at him warmly. "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby mama," he says, returning the kiss. "And I'll always be amazed by you."

We share a quiet moment with our new baby, simply soaking in her presence and wondering what she'll add to our big family. I'm close to falling asleep when I hear the front door come open, and Catherine's voice along with our four other kids.

"Now, be quiet," she says. "Mama is probably resting with Daddy and the baby."

"Baby Talulah!" Tybie cheers, and I smile softly.

"They're here," I say.

"Inside voices," Catherine says. "Go on in. See if they're awake."

I open my eyes and see my biggest baby's face first - Theo, who's almost 12. I have no idea how he got that old, or where all the years went, but he's almost a young man. He takes after Jackson in so many ways I can barely keep track.

"Hi, mom," he says.

"Hi, guys," I whisper, so not to wake the sleeping bundle in my arms. "Come meet your baby sister."

Slowly, just like their grandma told them, they all come closer. They're hesitant, though, especially Tybie and Tristan who don't have as much experience with new babies.

"Come on," I say, nodding them along. "Get up on the bed, she wants to see you."

Smiling at my playful tone, they all clamber up at once and surround me and Jackson. Theo sits on his knees near my feet, Tessa gravitates towards her daddy, Tybie rests her head on my shoulder, and Tristan sits sucking his thumb leaning against my side.

I look to the father of my children, beaming. We have more than we ever bargained for, but any less wouldn't feel right. We have everything we need, right here.

But five is definitely enough.