Warnings for sexual content and descriptions of painful postpartum sexual intercourse.
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Two weeks passed after the doctor cleared them to have sex, but Sakurai knew enough not to push for it. He saw firsthand how Morioka shuffled around their house, sitting painfully on a donut or trying to hide the super-sized pads she had to wear to staunch all the blood. Her vulva was red and swollen and in-between feedings she sat with bags of ice wrapped in hand towels, pressing them against her crotch. "Oh god," Morioka moaned. "I'm so embarrassed! Don't look at me!" And Sakurai pretended not to notice that her breasts were leaking.
It wasn't until the third week that Morioka approached him, one hand across her chest and clutching the top of her arm, nervously. "Yuta?" she asked. She was standing by the wall of their kitchen. "The baby is sleeping. Do you want to have sex with me?"
Sakurai looked up. Morioka tugged on her shirt sleeve, shyly.
"It's okay. We don't have to do that right away, I know you're still healing," Sakurai said. Morioka's mouth twisted.
"I know...I know my body isn't what it used to be..."
Sakurai's eyes widened. "What? No-"
"I know my breasts are sagging and I have a big belly-"
"I love your body! I think you're sexy!"
"Then why won't you have sex with me?" Her eyes flicked upwards, nervously.
"I'm afraid of hurting you," Sakurai said. "You had a big tear. I want to make sure you're okay before we do it, first."
"I think I'm okay." She rubbed her arm. "Are you okay if we try?"
Sakurai licked his lips. His throat is dry. "If you think you're ready, I'm okay to try."
"Okay..." Morioka tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
xXx
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She was nervous. He could tell by the way she was tensing her muscles, the muscles of her jaw clenching and unclenching as she stared up at the ceiling.
"Are you okay?" he asked. She nodded quickly.
"I'm fine. I'm just a little nervous. I kind of feel like I did when I was a virgin."
"Okay," he said, and he dropped a small kiss on her collarbone. "Tell me if it hurts, and I'll stop."
"Okay," she said, and he moved to mouth her breasts.
"Stop, stop!" she said, and Sakurai jerked back, startled. "Sorry," Morioka said. "My nipples are too tender now."
Sakurai smiled ruefully. "My apologies. I should have known these are just for the baby."
"Heh." Morioka let out an embarrassed laugh. He smiled and pressed a penitent kiss on her sternum.
He moved lower, kissing her skin. He liked how her belly was all soft and cushiony. "Don't look at me there!" Morioka said, cringing.
"Sorry."
He patted her thigh, letting her legs fall nervously on either side of him as he positioned himself, pressing a soft kiss against her clit before licking gently.
Above him, Morioka's eyes closed, and she turned her head to the side, breathing heavily. She was wet and her clit was swollen, and she jerked a little as he carefully began licking her shaft.
Her breathing grew louder. The muscles of her thighs tightened and he felt her pushing into his mouth, concentrating on her orgasm. Then she jerked and gasped and twitched beneath him, five, six, seven times, before her body fell limp onto the mattress. She opened her eyes and breathed hard, watching him.
He was nervous. Slowly, he pressed his cock into her, watching her face for any sign of discomfort. She was holding her breath, and as he slowly slid in, he heard her suck in her breath.
"Are you okay?"
She nodded quickly, squeezing her eyes. "I'm fine."
He eased in slowly, watching her; she breathed hard through her nose and nodded, pressing her hand to his back, encouraging him.
He gave her one firm push upwards, until he was completely inside her.
"Are you okay?" he asked again.
"Yeah." She nodded against his shoulder.
He laid there quietly, waiting for her to adjust. His penis pulsed but the last thing he wanted was to move too soon, he didn't want to hurt her. Finally he felt her relax, and it was only then that he gave her a small, experimental thrust.
"It hurts it hurts it hurts-"
"Sorry, sorry!" He quickly pulled out.
Morioka was shaking. She curled her legs to her chest and rolled on her side. She slung her arm over her eyes and started crying quietly.
"Moriko?" He pulled her by the shoulders, hugging her. "I'm so sorry, Moriko!"
"Forgive me! I'm such a horrible wife, you can't even have sex with me!"
"No no no, it's my fault for hurting you." He hated himself for pushing her. He pulled her arm from her eyes, then wiped a tear with his thumb.
He kissed her and stroked her cheek, pressing his forehead against hers while he wiped her eyes. Morioka sniffed, miserably.
"I'm sorry you didn't get to come."
"What?" Sakurai laughed. Morioka smiled ruefully and hid her face against his neck. "I don't care about that. I just want to make sure you're okay."
"I'm sorry." She spoke into his neck. "I just know it's been a long time since we've had sex."
His eyes were soft as he brushed back the hair from her face.
"Thank you for thinking of me," Sakurai said softly. Morioka sniffed ruefully.
"Actually, Yuta. I wasn't just thinking of you. It's just that the last few days, I've been really really horny."