Shinpachi bit his lip, tapping his pen on his knee as his brain raced through anything he might've forgotten. "Did you remember the drinks, yes?" Kagura drawled, sprawled across the couch opposite of him.

"Check." He replied.

"The nachos?"

"Check."

"The nacho dip."

A sigh. "Check."

A very annoyed click of the tongue. "A personality then, yes?"

Lip pulled back, Shinpachi's pen flew at Kagura with the precision of a dagger. It was useless though, not that he had any expectations (that was the key to happiness you know) and the pen burrowed it's way neatly into the wall behind her. "That's it!" he cried, smacking his fist into his open palm, "Pens!"

Kagura looked bored. "Oh, how exciting."

Finishing the last of the list, Shinpachi looked it over one more time before a lazy voice just on the brink of curiosity spoke behind him, "What kind of shopping list is that Shinpachi, you opening a club or something?" Shinpachi froze, turning his head jerkily to see Gin's dead fish eyes staring right at him and his incriminating stupidly not in code list.

As usual under pressure, Shinpachi's smile looked brutally forced and his laughter short and choppy. "Ahhahahaha! Gin-san, you're so funny. Between this and the dojo and of course doing the chores in both houses, not to mention being the leader of Otsu-chan's biggest fanclub and also making sure you and Kagura-chan stay alive and making sure Kondo-san isn't in my house stalking my sister and of course we can't forget all the nice things I do for people because ahahah a samurai must always help those in need, where do you think I'd have the time to run a club?" By the time he was done he was blue in the face and starting to forget what air felt like in his lungs but the concerned expression (read what the hell is wrong with you face) proved him to be in the clear.

"You need a life Pachi-boy." Gin said finally, shaking his head as though in mourning.

"Or a girlfriend!" Kagura chirped, grinning gleefully at Shinpachi's betrayed glare.

"One step at a time Kagura. A man can't leap through life, but must inch his way up through his own strength!" Gin posed as though giving some grand speech at a banquet hall in the presence of all the world leaders and their beautiful spouses as he was given the most prestigious award in the universe. "Of course, some people take longer than others, it takes them years to move an inch! Our Shinpachi might never get past the cherry boy stage." Hands clutched beneath his chin, Gin turned dramatically to the window, letting the sun hit his face at the most melancholic angle.

Furious, Shinpachi whipped a pillow in his direction, "Says the man who hasn't had a girlfriend ever!"

Gin looked aghast. "How do you know that?! You don't know that!"

"You admitted it!" Shinpachi really deserved an award for how accusatory he could make pointing, "Right now!"

Kagura picked her ear fluctuating between looking disgusted and bored and decided to settle on superior. "Ahhah, look at you poor scum at the bottom of the barrel. Don't worry, I won't let you die all alone, you can live in my basement when I'm rich and famous." She boasted, fanning herself casually with Shinpachi's list.

"You've never dated anyone either!" They yelled at her in unison.

Jerking up, Kagura's brows furrowed, "I have too, yes! I dated that giant boy who almost destroyed the earth remember!"

"That doesn't count!" Shinpachi shrieked, "No way. Absolutely not! Crazy genocidal aliens don't count!"

"That's rude! He's still a person!"

Gin looked disappointed. "I'm ashamed of you Shinpachi. You can't just take away a person's personhood. A person is a person."

Flabbergasted and caught between two idiots, Shinpachi threw his hands in the air. "I give up! You two morons are impossible!" Grabbing his list from the floor where Kagura dropped it, he whirled around, making a point to grab Gin's wallet as he went, "I'M GOING SHOPPING!" He yelled, mainly for the theatrics.

"BRING BACK SWEETS!" Gin hollered back, because he lived for the drama too.

"SUKONBU!" Kagura's roar shook the walls of the house Shinpachi was pretty sure, but unfazed, he refused to look back.

"FINE YOU UNGRATEFUL BASTARDS, BUT DINNER BETTER BE READY WHEN I GET BACK! AND YOU'RE COMING WITH ME KAGURA-CHAN!"

"OH YEAH! I JUST NEED MY UMBRELLA!"

"FINE! I'M MAKING HOT POT SO DON'T BE LATE OR IT'LL BE COLD!"

"FINE!"

"FINE!"

The door slammed shut.

The two kids leaned against the door heaving in relief. "That was close." Kagura whispered.

Shinpachi sighed into his hands. "And who's fault is it anyways!"

Kagura clicked her tongue, finger stuck up her nostril, "Shut it glasses, we're gonna miss open hours."

Grumbling, Shinpachi bounded next to her, the two of them settling into a leisurely pace to the supermarket. The second they entered the store, Shinpachi's Ultra Housewife Mode spurred into action, his eyes immediately scanning for sales and overpriced nonsense to disregard. With one eye on the aisles and the other on Kagura and her sneaky hands, he was ready to take on even the homeliest of mothers. Of course, it wasn't long before Kagura tried to cheat.

"Kagura," he said patiently, "I can see you, you know."

Guiltily, Kagura's gaze shifted up towards his before reluctantly stuffing the family sized pack of chips back onto the shelf. "How do you expect me to fight if you're starving me." She muttered.

Shinpachi rolled his eyes, not even bothering to respond to her blatant hyperbolization of life. Nobody- N.O.B.O.D.Y- ate more than Kagura did. He managed to placate her with a pack of sukonbu he kept in his pockets for emergencies (read minor inconvenience he needed to distract Kagura from). Without much fuss, the two finished the shopping, splitting up into two at the cashiers to take advantage of Shinpachi's meticulously colour-coded coupon binder. It was all about maximizing efficiency and ripping off the big guy! Expression blank, Kagura tossed the binder at the blind-sided cashier, "Just use them all." She drawled, looking just menacing enough for him to squeak and scramble to scan the relevant codes.

On the other end of the store Shinpachi was fervently arguing with the cashier. "If I combine these two coupons here and then add in this third one there next to the cute puppy one then I should be getting 112% off!"

The girl's smile fractured just a little. "Sir, we can't give you back money. This is a store. That's not how this works."

Shinpachi pushed his glasses farther up his nose as he smirked. "But if you look at the asterisks here, here and here, it says the store encourages you to merge coupons together. By your own store's law, law," he repeated, "You have to make this the final discount. You thought I wouldn't go keeping year old coupon books. But I DID."

Jutting out her lip and looking increasingly unimpressed, the girl reached out for the third coupon and ripped it in half. Shinpachi shrieked, rushing to grasp at the falling pieces, tears pricking his eyes. "My coupon!" he wailed.

Smiling much more pleasantly, the girl rang up his order and held out her hand. "Congratulations! You've received a 75% discount. That'll be ninety-eight forty please."

Sulking, Shinpachi forked over the money, making the cashier tug it out of his hand in petty revenge before carrying his bags out the store to meet Kagura. Shooting one sad glance at his friend, Shinpachi sighed. "So, did you pay ninety too?"

Kagura gave him a weird look, "Of course not, he gave me ninety." Smirking, she waved the bills in front of his face, not understanding why he burst into tears the second she did.

An hour or so later, Shinpachi returned without most of their shopping, having stashed the…special items behind the house before sending Kagura their secret signal that involved some tripping, totally casual whale noises and a swear word just for fun. Bounding up from her seat Kagura rocked on the balls of her feet for a few seconds before smiling sweetly at her guardian. "Gin-chan, are you going to be a waste to society again and sleep at the pachinko parlor?"

Gin scowled. "Watch it brat or I'll spend all our money on coins and have nothing left to feed you with."

Engulfed suddenly with some stupid affection blooming in her belly, Kagura leaned over his desk to hug him gruffly from the side, pressing her face into his neck. "Stupid Gin-chan." She could feel his smile by the pull of his jaw against her forehead and loosened her hold quickly before running out the door.

"Well I'm off! See you later!" She waved, eyes eclipsed by her cheeks from the width of her smile.

Smiling softly back, Gin tucked his hands behind his head. "Brat."

Dusting the last of the knick-knacks on the shelf, Shinpachi put away the cleaning supplies and waved at his boss. "See you tomorrow Gin-san. Please don't actually spend all our money. I need to buy us bus tickets for our next job."

Gin waved a hand in the air nonchalantly. "It'll be fine, it'll be fine. Don't you trust Gin-san?"

Shinpachi grinned cheekily, "Not with money I don't." And with that, Shinpachi walked out the apartment, trying not to look too eager or that he was trying too hard to not look too eager, which was really the worse outcome, and hoped he succeeded as he met the fresh air.

Quickly jogging up to their meeting place, he and Kagura made their way to the warehouse, Sougo already there, looking bored and displeased at their lateness. "Why set a time if you're determined to break it every time?" He asked, poking Kagura in the cheek relentlessly.

Snapping his finger backwards without even looking, Kagura sneered. "Only losers are on time. It's best to be fashionably late, yes." Arms crossed and chin high, she looked awfully sure of herself for someone who quoted meaningless sayings.

Shinpachi smiled apologetically. "Sorry Okita-san. I was just finishing cleaning up. I hope you weren't waiting long."

"It's fine, I was too busy gloating anyway." He paused, grinning like a madman, "I turned Hijikata-san's hair orange." He said with glee.

Kagura snorted, rushing over and pulling at his shoulder, "Lemme see, lemme seeeee!"

Grinning, Sougo beckoned Shinpachi over, scrolling through his phone photos to show an assortment of candid shots of Hijikata with a good portion of his hair bleached a horrific shade of orange. Never one to hold in her emotions, Kagura wiped tears from her eyes as she guffawed with her whole heart and soul. While the pictures were funny, Shinpachi couldn't help but feel bad. It looked really, really, horrible.

The sympathy on his face must've shown because Sougo stood up abruptly, clicking his phone shut. "Aww glasses you're no fun. You're not supposed to sympathize with the enemy."

"I can't help it! It's too hideous! Maiming him would've been kinder! He would've at least gone out with honor!"

Sougo's expression was wicked, "Is that permission to skip practice and maim him?"

"ABSOUTELY NOT!" Shinpachi shoved a bag of supplies into the cop's arms and pointed towards the entrance, "Go set up. You're completely unbelievable."

Sougo let out a huff but didn't comment, pushing open the big doors instead and holding it open as Shinpachi and Kagura hauled in the boxes of supplies. That didn't stop him from slamming the door shut as Kagura stepped in halfway with the last box getting her nose bonked by the edge. Shrieking, she threw the box in the air as she threw a punch, dodging a recipricatory kick before both their eyes widened in alarm, arms reaching out to grab the box before it fell to the ground. Their hands clasped around one another's as they balanced it in the air while Shinpachi's berating flooded their ears.

"Can't you two for once just set up normally?" He moaned, unpacking the food behind the ticket booth counter. "That box is the only one with fragile things in it." He gave them a pointed stare.

Sullenly, the two mischief makers looked down at the ground and muttered mumbled apologies as they set the box down as gently as two monster sadists could. "What's even in this anyway?" Sougo asked, peering into the box's contents, Kagura's face sliding nearer to his own.

The tips of Shinpachi's ears reddened. "Well…" he started, before Kagura's shocked gaze locked on his own.

"Alcohol?"

Sougo choked on a laugh. "Have you ever even drank?" He guffawed, mirth dancing in his eyes.

Stuttering, Shinpachi refused to look at either of them focusing very intently on the unpacking. "Do you know how much people will pay for one glass? A lot!" His friends looked unconvinced.

"Enough to buy three packs of sukonbu and a pack of 25 bullets!" Interest piqued in their eyes and Shinpachi knew he had them hooked.

Kagura studied the bottles intently, looking skeptical. "This stuff really can't be all that great, yes."

Sougo didn't say anything, but looked like he was up to no good anyway. Packing the idea away for later, he shrugged, pulling them out the box to be sorted. "People will pay any amount to forget."

"Forget?" Kagura's eyes were too wide and pure for everything she had seen and all the blood that had stained her fist. It did contortionist tricks in Sougo's heart and warped the world at the corners of his vision.

"What kind of people come to spend their nights to watch two kids fight." They didn't need to ask what kind of kids fought for money in the first place.

But like she always did, Kagura stared darkness down with her will like the sun and burned it all away. "Suckers will be suckers." She declared, a cocky grin spreading across her face and making her look so damn attractive Sougo couldn't look away, "And I for one, am not gonna say no, yes."

Sougo closed his eyes, the softest of smiles on his lips. Kagura's lashes fluttered as her eyes widened just a fraction of an inch. Sougo had a face like a blade, all edges and gaze too sharp. But sometimes, so rare like the sun meeting the moon in such a climactic declaration of love it transformed the whole colour of the sky, his face softened into something so gentle it dazed her. Catching herself, Kagura looked away hurriedly, fussing with the bags in her hands.

"You're so stupid, yes."

"It's part of my charm." He replied, his grin laid-back and lazy.

Kagura rolled her eyes. "You're about as charming as a rock, yes."

"Well at least I'm not as heavy as one." Was his immediate reply, expertly dodging a case of beer.

The bottles crashed to the floor, the beer escaping from the shards and soaking into the cracks. "Why didn't you catch it!" Shinpachi looked positively distraught as he rushed to inspect the damage.

"With what, my head?!"

Kagura clutched at her waist, heaving with laughter. Whipping around with righteous fury, Shinpachi pointed one incriminating finger at her, "Don't you dare laugh. This is really your fault."

"He called me heavy!"

"Are you?!"

"NO!"

"Then why does it matter!"

Kagura went silent. Pouting as she crossed her arms and looked away. Shinpachi sighed, "Well at least we have that money the store gave us. I'll go buy a new pack, it's fine. Let's just be more careful, ok?"

The two troublemakers said nothing, which was as close to an agreement for people whose egos were bigger than they were that he was going to get. "The store gave you money?" For all of Sougo's obnoxious behavior, he sounded genuinely intrigued.

Kagura grinned, "Shinpachi's a really good housewife, his coupon binder is insane."

Sougo let out what might have been a giggle before immediately controlling himself. Shinpachi pretended he didn't hear anything as he strode out the door trying to retain what little dignity he had left. As the door shut behind him, Kagura sighed at the mess. "I hate cleaning." She announced.

"I didn't see you complaining when you saved those dish boys an hour of their lives by licking all of your buffet plates clean."

Kagura's cheeks darkened. "That's different. Gin-chan says it's bad to waste food."

Deciding not to comment, Sougo walked over the supply closet and pulled out a trash bag and some cleaning supplies, tossing a paper towel roll to Kagura. "Let's just get this over with before he comes back."

Kagura huffed, getting on her knees to scrub at the floors. "He's such a nag that Shinpachi."

"What a mom." Sougo agreed.

And yet, there was not an ounce of scorn in either of their voices. It wasn't every day you came by a Shinpachi.

The two worked in silence for a bit before Kagura's laugh broke the monotony they had created. "What is it China brat?"

"Who you calling a brat, punk?" Kagura scrubbed at the floor harder. "I was just thinking about what Shinpachi said. About making our fights more exciting."

"I think they're already exciting." It came out before he even knew he was thinking it.

The back of Sougo's neck set itself ablaze as he felt Kagura's amused stare. "Well no one cares what we think. It's about what the customers want."

They both ignored the way they felt when she said 'we.'

"We should use swords." Sougo said the first thing on his mind to keep them from entering into an awkward silence that could deafen them with the thoughts they buried deep inside.

Kagura curled up her nose. "I hate swords. They're for samurai."

"Well I hate umbrellas. They're for alien freaks." His teasing tone urged an unimpressed glare from Kagura before she lit up with an idea.

"Why don't we switch!"

Sougo's brows arched in thought. It wasn't a bad idea really. To fight with the other person's strength being your weakness. It sounded kind of fun. "Ok, but I want an umbrella like your dad's."

"What's wrong with mine!"

"It's too small shrimp."

"Tch. I'll outgrow you eventually. Just you wait."

Sougo grinned, "Wanna bet on it? You know I'm gonna grow too right?"

"I'm so going to enjoy kicking your ass with your own sword."

Sougo leaned back onto his hands looking amused and competitive all at once. "Oh yeah? You don't even know how to use it."

"Sure I do. I just have to copy you but make it better." Sougo's curious stare invited her to elaborate, sighing, Kagura beckoned him up. "Pull out your sword."

Not liking being ordered around but also wondering where this was all going, Sougo did as she wanted, holding it out as though ready to enter into battle. "See look, if I was going to come at you, you'd swing that at me from your left side which is where I duck under to kick you at your ankle because by then, the sword will be at your right and you'll be wide open."

Sougo scoffed, "Only if you're fast."

Kagura smirked, "Oh. I'm fast." Sougo gulped and wondered why.

Immediately, she was right next to him, foot pressed against his ankle and hand wrapped around the hilt of his sword atop his own fingers. He could tell she enjoyed having him caught off guard, noticed the smell of her, and the way her eyes could glow with emotions he doubted he could ever place. But he grit his teeth and focused on the physicality of the fight, of the motions they danced through time and time again. He would not be beat. Spinning, he swiped his leg into an arc, forcing her to jump and let go of his hand and giving him space to jump back, sword pressed to the heart of her throat. Kagura scowled. "No fair."

Sougo shrugged, slipping his sword back in his scabbard. "Hey now, it goes both ways you know. You may know my style but I know yours."

"I know more." Kagura taunted.

"In your dreams maybe."

"In yours."

Sougo looked deeply unimpressed. "Wow. How creative. Danna should really put you in school, you've been out too long. Isn't that illegal?"

"You're not one to talk about illegal! You're the most corrupt cop I've ever met!"

Unable to come up with a comeback, Sougo stuck out his tongue and two fingers. The two worked in silence for a minute or two before Kagura shrieked, startling Sougo so that his hand slipped from under him and he fell face first onto the alcohol soaked floor. "China!" He hollered.

"I'm BORED!" She wailed, flat on her back, hand at her forehead in a distressed damsel about to perish kinda way.

"Shinpachi's better at cleaning, why do I have to-" She stopped, her dramatics calming into a curious pause.

Looking up at where she was focusing, Sougo knew exactly what she was thinking before she said it. "Race you." He goaded, already on his feet and running.

Grinning, Kagura ran three steps before soaring into the air, doing a perfect flip before catching the rope loop dangling from the ceiling in her palms. All around the ceiling beams, loops and loops of rope hung about, carrying pulleys and sandbags and other knickknacks. Technically, they were still cleaning up, the rope was unseemly, seedy even! It was really in the greater interest of the company that they fix it all up.

"Sadist. Sadist!" Kagura urged, hand waving with intensity, "We don't have a name." Sounding aghast.

"Just because your parents didn't love you enough to give you a name, doesn't mean you have to drag me into it."

Kagura scowled, rocking the rope she was tangled into to send her flying towards Sougo, leg outstretched. Eyes widening, Sougo dropped down from his perch so that he hung on only by his knees, swinging forward to launch towards another stray end. Kagura scowled. Tch. Better luck next time. "I meant for this…thing, we're doing." She elaborated, gesturing around them.

"Why does it matter? Nothing cool has a name."

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard, yes. I was thinking The Super Awesome Alien Hero Destroys Stupid Earthling/Dog Hybrid Twice Weekly."

Sougo snorts, swinging lackadaisically, hands looped behind his head. "Really? Because I was thinking, Sadist House. Slogan: Wild Alien Beasts Domesticated and Trained."

"You know what this is, Disappoint Your Families."

"Why Good Parenting Matters, the Musical."

"Life Sucks Sometimes So We Beat Up Our Friends and Let You Watch."

Something like melancholy clogged up their words and Kagura's swinging slowed to a stop. Sougo looked up from beneath his bangs. He didn't like that slightly crestfallen dullness in her eyes or the way her lip bent and then struggled to lift back up into a smile.

"That's too long idiot." He declared, "No one's gonna remember that."

Kagura went quiet before a slow smile grew. "Bet you have lots of experience with that, what with no one ever remembering your name and all, Souichiro-kun."

Sougo let out an amused breath. "Wanna see who can jump the farthest?"

Without even answering, Kagura took in a breath and yelled as she threw her momentum forward grabbing onto a rope four metres away. Quiet in concentration, Sougo stood up on his rope and pushed his body forward and back until he got just the right speed to throw himself next to her. Unfortunately, he miscalculated how Kagura's constant fidgeting would displace the ropes around her and his fingers grasped the nothingness. For one terrifying split second, he thought he'd missed out on the opportunity of a lifetime to get rich all because he broke all his bones playing a dumb game with no reward before Kagura's hand clasped around his and hauled him up with ferocity.

Gripping the rope, Sougo settled next to her on their makeshift swing and leaned his head against it. "I won't say thanks since it was your fault."

She wrinkled her nose, "You're too close to me." And she was hyper aware of their sides pressed together like the sky meeting the sea, seamless and stunning.

"Suffer in silence then." He replied easily.

Kagura bit her lip, like she was looking for something but didn't know what. Maybe something like courage. Or more like clarity. "I take my name back. Life doesn't always suck, yes." Her fingers were tight around the rope, her knuckles turning white. "It did a little, before. But now, with everybody, I have a new life." She took in a breath, looked at him with the openness of a bird whose wings outstretched across the world, "You feel the same, yes?"

Sougo looked down, never one to be so open as to have the things locked behind bars and chains so free. He rocked their makeshift swing more tilting his head slightly towards her, trying to look snide but having the mortifying feeling it came out curious. "Your kind is allergic to the sunlight. Too much of it and you'll die. Wouldn't you rather be…" He shook his hand in the air in some vague gesture for a word like home, but not.

Kagura tilted her head back, a wistful expression on her face and a wry turn of her lip. "I used to live on a planet that always rained. It was so cloudy, we never had to worry about the sun. Instead, we worried about Mami's sickness and my idiot brother's fights and Papi never being home." She turned her gaze onto him and something like a storm surged inside him, "There's something about the sun, something about its light, that makes me love it despite everything. Makes me love Earth. Where everything is warm and the rain always goes away, yes."

"I didn't know you wanted to get fried that bad." He said, instead of all the half-thoughts swirling in his head.

"What are you saying stupid sadist? Shinpachi would never let that happen. We have more sunscreen than Toshi has mayo, yes." She laughed cheekily, open and with abandon.

"Even with a new home, you still can't help miss the old one." He blurted, helplessly and idiotically, thoughts of his sister engulfing him.

Sougo gaped, questioning his sanity before the surprise in Kagura's eyes melted into a quiet understanding. "Yeah. But I'm happy I met everyone. Staying in the past leaves nothing but emptiness, that's what Gin-chan says."

Sougo looked at her, really looked at her, and saw the age behind her youth. There were shadows in her irises like rumbling clouds over the sea. Her lips curled into a smile liberated of everything but joy from how close she has come to anguish that she knows better than to not clasp onto joy with both hands. He stared a little too deeply, lost in his thoughts of her hair and the curve of her cheekbones and he couldn't help but whispering the one truth he knows, "I'm happy too."

The door burst open and simultaneously, the two shrieked, hands flailing. The jerky motions sent them both tumbling onto the ground in a moaning heap. Across from them, with death in the tightness of his jaw and his expression bordering on manic, Shinpachi's voice meant sure doom, "Hello Kagura-chan, Okita-san, I'm so glad you volunteered to do everything while I just sit here and watch."

Globby tears welled up in Kagura's eyes as she outstretched one shaky hand to her friend, "Shi-Shin-chan…please…have mercy." She strangled on a cough, clutching at her chest with all the dramatic flair of the trashy soap operas she watched guiltily with Gin.

"I think I broke my leg." Sougo broached, poking his knee experimentally.

"Too bad! I go away for ten minutes and you're on the ceiling making an even bigger mess! We have clients coming in tomorrow and you two are just lounging!"

"For a pair of glasses, you talk too much." Sougo said drily.

Snickering, Kagura propped herself up, dusting herself off. "You're such a nag Shinpachi. Everything'll be fine, jeez."

"YOU'RE STILL NOT CLEANING!" He screeched, brandishing his broom like a weapon and not stopping his smacking until they were both up and running, cursing his name.

Despite all their fussing, they couldn't help but feel some swell of accomplishment at the finished look. They had added a concession stand next to Shinpachi's welcome booth and even had a few team merchandise things for offer. Kagura grabbed a #1 Yato finger and immediately shoved it into Sougo's eyeball snickering at his indignation. "Bet my stuff sells more than your stuff." She taunted.

Brow raised, Sougo leaned forward suggestively, "Oh? And what are you gonna give me when you lose China pig?"

Two hands rose from thin air to smack them atop their heads. "It's not a competition you idiots. The more we sell of either set," he stared meaningfully, "Is good because we get more money, get it?"

Sighing, Shinpachi collapsed in his chair, "I hope this Otsu-chan concert is worth it." Then, horrified at himself for even uttering such blasphemy, threw himself on the floor, prostrating repeatedly, "I'm sorry Otsu-chan! I've failed you as Fan Club Captain. OTSUUUUU-CHAAANN!"

Sharing twin looks of disgust, Shinpachi never saw the T-shirt projectiles coming.

"Welcome everyone for today's fighting challenge!" Shinpachi waved his arm in the air, hyping the crowd, "Today's winning bid challenge iiiiissss," brandishing the envelope with the bidding winner, Shinpachi waited for that exact moment where suspense was high enough to pound in people's heads but not enough that people started throwing things at him, "Up first, we have a blindfolded battle!" The crowd cheered its approval, "And up next, our competitors will be handcuffed! A true test of strength and wits!"

"Contestants! Take your places!"

Kagura and Sougo walked to opposite ends of the ring, waiting in anticipation for Shinpachi to come and tie the rags around their eyes. As darkness overtook them, the thrum and roar of the crowd drowned out their other senses. Breathing in deeply, Kagura rocked on the balls of her feet, getting a feel of the terrain as she tried to hone her senses down to just two things; the floor and Sougo.

On the other side, Sougo retained his bored demeanor. The Shinsengumi trained with sensory deprivation techniques all the time, part of Hijikata's be-prepared-for-everything-and-anything-even-those-weird-freaky-things-on-TV-because-we-live-in-such-a-shit-show-world. Grudgingly, Sougo had to commend their obsessive commander. Maybe he wasn't such a full-blown waste of space after all.

Upon remembering the boxes and boxes of mayo stashed in the kitchen though, Sougo had to amend his amendment.

At Shinpachi's whistle, the two flew into the centre of the ring only for Sougo to stop halfway, a half smile on his face. Kagura whooshed by, stopping at the last second to shoot a fist out to his face. Feeling the air move with a killer's intent, Sougo brought up his forearm to block and kicked out to where he knew the rest of her body to be. He knew Kagura better than she thought. Knew how long her limbs were, how each joint connected into a perfect killing machine. He could see her just as clearly as though he weren't wearing a blindfold at all. She must've sensed his cockiness because at once, her knee was jammed in his groin and he could hear her laughter.

…That too, went straight to his groin.

Shaking off his despicably bad timing and ignoring the way Kagura's waist felt beneath his fingers as he flung her to the side, Sougo threw himself back into focus. Kagura's fists were like hornets, everywhere all at once, sharp and staggering. Swooping down to get in a sucker punch into her stomach, she used his momentum to propel herself over him, locking her knees around his head. The muscles in her thighs clenched around him and Sougo knew if she so wanted, she could snap his neck like a crack of lightening. He also knew he was a freak of nature for finding that so ridiculously attractive he almost lost his footing as she tried to trip him over.

She settled for throwing herself backward, landing on her hands and flipping his body over like a ragdoll. Shit that was cool. Sougo thudded to the ground, brain clattering inside his head. He felt her knee press into his chest and knew she'd be wearing that shit-eating grin she loved so much before she even ripped the blindfold off. "Hey Chihuahua." Her smirk was as infuriating as it was contagious, a bubbly kinda insane flowing through him.

"Just wait till the next match monster girl." Smiling some more, Kagura held out her hand.

"It's been a while since I've been handcuffed." And she was too coy to be cute.

Sougo took her hand and brought his face so close to hers she had to see all the promises he kept within himself, "I'll be gentle."

She shoved him away laughing. "No you won't. And don't you ever, yes."

Running a hand through his hair, Sougo jumped over the rope fencing to where Shinpachi lay in wait with a rag and a water bottle. "Good job Okita-san, the crowd was definitely impressed."

"Good to know." He muttered, dumping the rest of the bottle atop his head.

Shinpachi clasped his shoulder, smiling like a breeze, "You okay here? I'm going to go check up on Kagura-chan."

Sougo waved a hand in the air but offered him a small smile. He liked the glasses kid. Which was saying something since Sougo didn't really much like anybody. Except Kondo-san. And Danna. And maybe…he shook his head. Time to focus on fighting.

"Shinpachi! Shinpachi! Wasn't I great? Wasn't I fantastic!" Kagura gushed, pressing her hands together in her signature compliment-me-or-I-might-self-combust-and-make-you-clean-my-ashes kinda way.

Smiling gently, Shinpachi pat her on the head, handing her a bottle of water and an energy bar. "You were super cool Kagura-chan! I think you made a couple fans today."

Stars burst to life in her eyes as she squealed. "They made the right choice, yes. Gura-san is definitely the best, ahahaaha!"

Exasperated, but not unaffectionately, Shinpachi shook his head. "I'm going to call you two up in about three minutes so rest up okay?"

"Kayyyyy." She chirped, munching on her snacks cheerfully, still on the winning high.

Shinpachi called them into the arena to the massive cheers of the crowd and winced a little as he saw his friends' wrists start to chafe from the cuffs. They were using Sougo's after making him swear he didn't know a secret way to open them or had sabotaged them in anyway-"I am a samurai, you know. I do have a bit of honor."- Shinpachi was skeptical but considering they had all fought to the death against enemies greater than anything more times than he could count, he figured he should have a little faith. Faith not just in Sougo but in Kagura not losing control and breaking the cuffs as easily as she could breathe as they both knew she could.

Shinpachi wrung his hands together and worried.

Damn his predictability.

This time around, the two didn't immediately charge at each other with reckless abandon, but instead danced around the other, trying to determine the others' efficacy without hands. Because those two were so battle complementary and also idiots of the highest calibre, they both had the exact same idea at the exact same time. Charging like rhinos, the two head-butted each other with enough force to send even the strongest of the crowd wincing from the crack that reverberated across the warehouse. Sougo and Kagura shared one last look of enmity before twin rivers of blood burst across their foreheads and they fell backwards, out for the count.

Shinpachi's jaw dropped before immediately closing because obviously. What could he really expect from two bloodthirsty ultra competitive morons. The crowd tittered, unsure of what their generic and mob-like reaction should be before Shinpachi strode into the arena quickly. Bending down, he checked to see if both were out for the count before shooting up. "I declare a tie! To collect your winnings please bring your ticket stubs back down to me at the front and to the rest of you, feel free to buy more snacks or some merchandise and be sure to tell all your friends! Have a good night!"

Hurrying back down to the booth, Shinpachi wondered if it was okay to just leave his friends there, but upon counting all the cash in his hands thought, oh what the hell, they've really been through worse.

"Hey, kid." A man with a patch on his eye loomed over Shinpachi, a pipe sticking out of his mouth like he was born with it.

Pinching his thigh, Shinpachi mustered forth all of his customer service training he had read online and smiled, "Hello sir, how may I help you?"

The man did not look impressed. Shinpachi thought he might've shrunk a little, but really couldn't be sure. "That bidding thing, whoever pays the most money gets whatever they want?"

Shinpachi nodded quickly, "Yes! Yes! As long as it follows our guidelines then anything goes." He went for the friendly arm swing to display trustworthiness, but ended up hitting his fist against the table.

Stupid wikihow.

A small smile broke over the man's face though Shinpachi found no comfort in it. "Good. See you next time kid."

Shinpachi frowned, wondering if he'd seen that guy before. There was something familiar about him. Maybe the tattoo…He's sure he'd seen those two curled horns from somewhere-

"Oy, glasses kid, the alien girl is moving!"

Distracted, Shinpachi rushed over to Kagura, checking her over to make sure everything was relatively fine. Pulling out the first aid kit, he dabbed at her forehead with a cloth and some rubbing alcohol before bringing the wound together with a butterfly bandage. "Anywhere else it hurts Kagura-chan?"

Blinking wearily, Kagura's fingers clutched his shirt, bringing him closer, "Who cares about that, did I win?"

Shinpachi chuckled uncomfortably, "Um-"

She narrowed her eyes, "No."

He shrugged helplessly, "Yes."

Kagura's shriek of rage knocked her back out leaving Shinpachi alone with a safe full of money and a few bottles of sake and cheap beer. He toed Sougo cautiously, "At least I know you won't arrest me." He said to the silence, before going to break the pretty much always broken law of underage drinking and wondering why he was doing the most teenagerish thing in the world in the least universal of circumstances.

He glared at his two friends and at the general landscape. See, this is why unresolved sexual tension ruined lives. Its gets the third wheel best friend wrapped up in all sorts of nonsense. Tiredly, Shinpachi wondered if he should've just invested in a match-maker instead. Or maybe just stayed in his lane.

Yeah, that probably would've been best.

(but then he remembered the money and all the fun he was having in secret shh, don't tell and decided to ignore how stupid the world was and focus on cleaning, because who was he kidding, he wasn't about to break any laws)

A/N So my goal for this story is to finish it before school starts, so let's see how that goes. I'm predicting this to be about two or three more chapters but we'll see because I always tend to over-write than anything. Alsooo I know the okikagu was light in this one, but it'll get more intense the next chapter, promise!