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"Twas the night before March 12th
And all through the limo
Not a creature was stirring
Not even a— whatever rhymes with limo"
There is one major flaw with this ancient Extremely Early Christmas Special rhyme. It is that every creature in the limo stirs on Extremely Early Christmas Special Eve.
Garystuheart was stringing lights around the limo. They were all in rainbow colors and there was a notable pattern in blinking lights on the outside. The lights spelled "#MLG is Swag, Normalstar is Foxdung!".
Marysuepelt was using her advanced gift wrap skills to epically cut the perfect amount of wrapping paper and coat the Secret Santa gifts with the paper. This was all with her eyes closed.
Elsafur was dashing about along with her new ginger friend, Annawhisker. She made ice stuff, snowflakes, and even a cat named Olafkit. As they sprinted around, the duo was singing songs from Disney's Frozen. While all of this preparation was happening, Bluetooth was at the mall, taking advantage of the figgy pudding free samples.
Tomorrow was going to a wonderful and extremely early celebration of the well known Christmas holiday. Everyone needed to be ready. But, there was one person who did not enjoy this rambunctious festivity: Normalstar. "It's not Christmas!" She normally growled at the festive limo, from which she normally heard loud carols. "It's March 11th! Clam down!"
Elsafur rolled down a window to reveal her cream tabby pelt flowing in the late leaf-bare breeze. She was wearing an icy dress with resemblance to the one worn by the character she was named after. "I don't care!" She sang, doing jazz paws. Marysuepelt had stopped wrapping gifts with her eyes closed and rolled down another window. "Silly Normalstar! Clamming down is for clams!" She chided "But, we have clams at SeaWorld if you want to tell 'em that!" The two cats both gave the normal leader the :P face as they rolled up their windows.
Once the swag cats were snug in their swag beds, Normalstar got a normal idea. A very normal, yet evil idea. Even more evil than ripping off How The Grinch Stole Christmas. She would normally steal their festivities while they were asleep.
Normalstar normally crept up to the limo and normally snuck in. As she normally galloped down the hall, she encountered a tiny kit. The tiny kit was looking up at Normalstar with sweet, beady, tiny kit eyes. "Aww…" Normalstar normally purred, normally feeling her normal heart normally melt. When Normalstar was normally distracted, the kit grew to her regular size. Marysuepelt was using her transformation powers to incapacitate Normalstar. She gripped Normalstar's normal white paw and judo flipped the normal leader and left her normally unconscious. The swag kitty threw Normalstar's normal limp body out of the limo and pressed a button to activate the Normalstar lock, which was placed next to the button for the similar child safety lock.
Finally, Extremely Early Christmas Special Day had arrived. Everyone's eyes popped open in excitement. They dashed to the giant snow globe room, where their presents were set.
Presents decorated the snowy floor of the globe. There were tons of colorful bow and ribbons. Each present was wrapped in wild wrapping paper. They were like enemy cats to them as they could not wait to tear into these gifts. It was all part of a Secret Santa project they had arranged, so nobody knew who gave what.
Garystuheart and his airhorn opened their presents. Technically, Garystuheart opened the present for his waifu. His wrapping was lime green like Mountain Dew and had Dorito print. There was aquamarine ribbon around the present. Inside was a wooden crate labeled "Thank you for subscribing to the Monthly #MLG Essentials Delivery Service" that was full of super swag #MLG stuff. It was filled to the gills with Mountain Dew, Doritos, shades, baseball caps, t-shirts, and more. There was even an airhorn in the corner of the crate. Garystuheart dropped the gift airhorn into the Clan's medicine den because he would NEVER betray his waifu.
Down on the ground, the tortoiseshell medicine cat, coincidentally named Medicinecat, was tending to her patients. After restocking some marigold, she padded over to a feverish queen. On her way, she stepped on the clicker of the airhorn, which had been dropped in the center. A blaring screech echoed through the den. Medicinecat and her patients' pelts all stood up on end, with the exclusion of one. "What's wrong with you?" A black elder named Batears (who was, ironically, deaf) asked, turning his head.
The cats chortled at the sight on the ground, especially at Normalstar who had normally heard the noise and normally fell into the previous normal slop in the normal dirtplace. After enjoying a long-winded laugh, it was time for the airhorn's present. The present was in shiny red paper and had thin white ribbon. Inside was a little box. "Look, waifu! It's the new airhorn cozy! As seen on TV!" Garystuheart exclaimed. Then, he gasped. The cozy was periwinkle with a tropical fruit pattern. "It matches my Snuggie!" The swag cat was now wearing a Snuggie with the exact same pattern as his waifu's new airhorn cozy. He hugged his waifu after putting the periwinkle cozy on the airhorn.
The she-cat fans of Garystuheart opened their gifts next. They were all wrapped in beach scene paper and had green bows. Muffinbelly's box contained a bundle of leaves. Crabcakes received a singing fish. Licoricetail obtained some cherry Twizzlers. Butterclaw was rewarded with several gallon jugs of Bisquick.
Garystuheart's children went next. Airhorn's gift was wrapped in shiny gold foil with bronze stripes and contained his very own airhorn that had a green grip. Applepie had her present in peach paper and it had a raspberry ribbon and it contained an EasyBake oven. The golden she-cat proceeded to make pumpkin spice muffins. Bananacream ripped into his gold and black paper to find a Tardis-like bottle of Reddi-whip. As he endlessly shot the cream into his mouth, Bouncemaster opened his lime green with brown ribbon present and discovered that is was full of cheese whales, which initiated his excitement. Fabuheart opened her identical box to the same thing. Brownsugar and Goldglitter both got a bunch of books, which they immediately began reading. Businesscase's present was his own briefcase which contained ties, colored pens, other assorted and whimsical office supplies, and on-the-go mahjong. Cheesenacho's was a build your own burrito kit. Dewmountain and Mountaindew were hyper on their highly caffeinated Mountain Dew presents. Elsafur and Annawhisker both received a whole boatload of Frozen merchandise. Bluetooth got an iPad Air. More presents were opened, yada yada yada.
Then, it was time for the feast. Everyone gathered in the fancy dining room to eat. Marysuepelt snapped her claws and the table was filled with food. There was turkey, chicken, duck, turducken, mice, cheese curls, cheese balls, cheese whales, popcorn, jelly beans, pretzel sticks, soft pretzels, toast, dry cereal, licorice, chocolate, blueberry muffins, pumpkin spice muffins, chocolate chip muffins, licorice, pancakes, waffles, Skittles, catmint, Slim Jims, cookies, brownies, beef, fruits, veggies, cornbread, cheese, figgy pudding, cinnamon rolls, holly, salad, croutons, chicken nuggets, chicken fingers, ice cream, nuts, cake, green eggs and ham, Egg McMuffins, Wheat Thins, Doritos, crackers, kittypet food, pudding, yogurt, Fig Newtons, Chef Boyardee meals, English muffins, jam, jelly, peanut butter, butter, fish, hash browns, tater tots, potatoes, baked potatoes, lollipops, Pop Tarts, shrimp, bacon, Cheez-its, potato chips, ham, bologna, hot dogs, meatballs, dinner rolls, rice, tofu, pocky, fortune cookies, bread, cottage cheese, pizza, french fries, milkshakes, assorted soda, root beer, water, sparkling water, juice, milk, slushies, and lemonade. If anything was missing, it would be automatically added.
After filling their bellies, which took a long time, they decided to give their Clan a present. The limo cats snickered as the pie present bomb crashed to the ground.