9

Week

"Tia! Tia!"

Luna woke with a start. She looked around and realized she had fallen asleep on her bedroom floor, still wearing her royal attire. Holding back tears, she levitated a pillow to herself, buried her face, and screamed. She rested her head there for a while, staring at the nearby wall. Her stomach growled, and she curled up on the floor.

"Why does this keep happening?" She hit the floor with her good hoof. "I am the princess of the night, of dreams! Why can I not prevent a simple nightmare?" She rolled onto her back, attempting to busy herself with the structure of the crystalline ceiling. It did nothing to calm her.

"How could I have fallen asleep? Yesterday and the day before were fine." She shivered. Stretching, she stood and walked to her bed. She picked up her blankets, wrapping herself up in them. "At least I could have had the decency to fall asleep in my bed."

She groggily walked out to the balcony. She gazed out at Ponyville, watching the ponies live out their lives. She saw several shops beginning to close up, fillies and colts beginning to trot back to their homes, and other ponies going slowly to different destinations.

It still amazed Luna, all of this. In this little town, there were hundreds of individual lives going on. Each life had gone through different events, seen different sights, heard different things, experienced something no other pony had before or will since. Through all of her dreamwalkings, after visiting countless ponies, she still couldn't fathom the limitlessness of their stories. If one took the time to write a day's happenings and place them together with all others', she doubted any library could hold them all.

A dark thought interrupted her awe. Yes, truly all ponies are unique in their experiences. Even their sufferings. She thought back to herself. To whom could she relate? Who could relate to her? The best she had was her sister, but even she couldn't help Luna at her worst. She felt trapped, helpless. She couldn't talk to anypony, not Twilight nor Starlight—nopony would understand. Who else dreamt of their sister dying every time they slept? Who else felt the way she did? Nopony. She pulled the blankets closer to herself and rested her chin on the railing with a groan. "What am I to do?"

Luna then noticed the sun hanging low in the sky. "Great," she said coldly, "supper already." Her stomach perked up, and she inwardly cursed it. She turned and went inside, not bothering to close the doors. She tossed the blankets on her bed in a heap. She approached her dresser, but upon looking at the mirror, she remembered she still had her crown and necklace on. She straightened them out, still angry with herself. She was about to go downstairs but stopped short, noticing something amiss in the reflection.

She was, for a moment, stunned by her visage. Her mane was a more muted blue than she remembered. It was limp, as if the invisible breeze keeping it aloft had died off. There were fewer twinkles, and the sheen usually present was gone. She looked back at her tail to find it in the same state. She looked more closely into the mirror, now at her eyes. Tiny red lines surrounded her irises, and her pupils jittered slightly even when she was focusing.

Her stomach murmured again, and she had to give a few moments' thought before she remembered her last meal. "Perhaps I should eat," she said simply. "It might help all of," she looked at her face again, "that." She looked down. She slowly limped out of her room.

"All costal cities, Princess Twilight?"

"Yes, get as many citizens out of the east as you can."

The guard nodded and left the map room. Twilight sighed, shuffling papers around, stacking them into piles for Luna to deal with. "That should be everything Celestia told us to do," she said to herself. Her stomach growled. Looking at the clock, she smiled and went out to the hallway.

She was greeted by dozens of doors. Trotting past them, she went over in her head the rooms which hid behind them—a hallway, a closet, the library, a bathroom, another hallway—until finally she had reached the dining room. She nudged open the door. Noticing Luna's absence, she huffed. Starlight had seemed to figure out most of the castle and was sitting at the already set table. Spike was fiddling with his napkin, impatiently awaiting the other two. Twilight trotted over to them but stopped short, surprised to see hayburgers on the table.

"What..." she said, levitating a burger. "What's this?"

"Dinner," said Spike simply.

"No, I mean why hayburgers?"

"Well," Spike said, "you know how you sent me into town to get some food?"

"I left you a list at the door, yes."

"See, I kinda forgot that, so I got the next best thing!"

Starlight stifled some laugher. Still levitating the burger, Twilight looked at it and then back at Spike, raising an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Ah," Spike snapped his claws. "Should've sprung for the salad, huh?"

"No, no, it's fine, it's fine. I like them anyway." She sighed. "Where's Luna? I'm starved."

"I dunno," Starlight said. "I haven't heard from her at all today."

"Maybe she's still sleeping?" Spike asked.

"I suppose," Twilight responded. "It's still a bit early for her. I'll go check—"

"No no," a voice from the hallway called. "That is not necessary." Luna stumbled into the dining room. "I am here."

"How'd you sleep?" Spike asked. Luna took her seat at the table, blinking away her grogginess. Twilight sat down across from her. Luna didn't seem to notice the dinner in front of her. "Uh," Spike said, "Princess Luna?"

"Hm? Oh, sorry." She yawned. "Uh, I slept quite alright." Twilight eyed her, but quickly glanced down when Luna looked at her. Luna looked at the hayburger, trying to silence her stomach.

"It's a hayburger," Spike said. "What, you've never had one before?" She said nothing but continued to stare at the plate.

"Twilight," Starlight said, "I thought the others were coming."

"What? Oh." Twilight sighed. "They're all volunteering to help clean up Canterlot. Well, I know Applejack, Rarity, and Fluttershy are. Not sure about Pinkie." She scowled slightly. "She hasn't talked to me since the attack. I think she went with the others, but—"

"Yeah," Spike said, "she did. She told me she was going."

"Oh," said Twilight. "How nice of her." Before she could start to eat, there was a knock at the door, and a guard poked his head in. Twilight groaned in exasperation. "What?"

"There is somepony here for Starlight," he said. Starlight's ears perked up, and she looked at the guard, puzzled.

Twilight shrugged. "Let them in." She muttered something under her breath. The guard opened the door, and behind him was Sunburst, looking more frazzled than usual. Twilight nodded at the guard, and he left.

Starlight gasped. "Sunburst?"

"H-hey," Sunburst said, stepping inside the room. "It's me."

Starlight stood and stared. She slowly walked over to him, then ran and hugged him. "Sunburst, you're okay! I-I thought you were at the Crystal Empire! I thought you had died!"

He hugged back, blushing. "N-nope. I was visiting my folks back at our old town. Almost boarded the train back when I heard what happened." They parted, Starlight's eyes now glistening. He cleared his throat. "Sorry for not telling you sooner."

"It's okay," she said. "Um..." She glanced at Twilight. "I can eat later. Do you mind if we...?"

"No, no," Twilight said with a wave of a hoof. "Go on. Catch up." The two ponies smiled at each other and left, with Starlight beginning to give Sunburst a grand tour of the castle to the best of her memory.

Twilight rolled her eyes and muttered something. "So. Luna," she said, starting to eat, "l wanted to ask you something this morning, but I missed you."

Luna closed her eyes and pushed her dish away slightly. "Yes?"

"Well," she tapped her hooves together, "what're we going to do about the griffons living in Equestria?"

Luna raised an eyebrow. "What about them?"

Twilight sighed. "I don't know how to put this, um..." She scratched her head. "I had this idea where we would..." she struggled for the right word, "relocate... the griffons away from the east coast and major cities."

Luna stared at her. Twilight shifted uncomfortably in her chair. Luna slowly shook her head. "You cannot be serious."

"Why not? I mean, it's not like we're imprisoning them or anything."

"Then where do you plan to keep them?" Luna asked.

Twilight spoke carefully. "I was thinking about south of Los Pegasus."

Luna furrowed her eyebrows. "You mean San Palomino?"

"Yes, b-but it's far away from the east coast and—"

"'Tis a desert, Twilight!"

"Then we'll build them shelters!" Twilight insisted. "What else are we going to do?"

"I will tell you what we shall do. Nothing."

Twilight balked. "Nothing?!"

"We are already doing what is needed. There is no reason to incarcerate thousands of citizens in a desert."

"It would only be a means to an end. I don't like it any more than you."

"To what end, then? Why do this?"

"To keep citizens safe!"

"From whom? Who is being protected here? Ponies?"

"Well, ponies and griffons. There could be crimes committed against or by griffons all over the country. Protests and riots from Vanhoover to Baltimare could pop up to get griffons out."

"And have their been such actions taken by our non-griffon citizens?"

"Well, not yet. But..." Twilight tapped her chin. "B-but what if there are griffon conspirators?"

"There could just as easily be pony conspirators. Why incarcerate one species?"

"It's the only lead we have! Why risk it?"

"We already have measures concerning griffons and security; we need not treat them as traitors first and citizens second." She leaned on the table with her good hoof. "How would we incarcerate thousands to San Palomino in the first place?"

"I don't know! And stop calling it incarceration! We aren't jailing them! It's an internment!"

"Whatever you may call it, it the same crime nonetheless. Why are you so adamant about this?"

Twilight groaned. "We are already evacuating three entire cities on the east coast. Why would this be any different?"

"They are being evacuated for their own safety from the aggressors, yes? Not detained, as if they were savages."

"We can't simply sacrifice national defense for—"

"For what? Correctness? Correctness is not the issue here, Twilight. It is morality and common decency. We do not need an entire species to be hated in our country because of what others in their species have done." She paused, looking between Spike and Twilight. "At this moment, there are squadrons in the Equestrian Air Force made up of volunteer griffons and hundreds more making sure the Air Force is fed and equipped. They are fighting alongside us because they are us. We are all Equestrian. This is not a war between species, between ponies and griffons; this is a war between nations. Differences between species has no part in it, and I do not want you to make it so. We are not going to incarcerate citizens." She sighed. "I am done discussing this with you."

Twilight scowled. "Celestia would've agreed with me," she mumbled.

Suddenly, Luna slammed her good hoof against the table, rattling everything on it. Twilight flinched, fearfully looking across the table. Spike looked at her, stunned. Luna was shaking in pure rage. Twilight cleared her throat meekly, but before she could say anything, Luna lit into her.

"Do not speak against the Sun!" Luna spoke, using her royal voice. Spike cowered under the table, trying to avoid the princess' wrath. Twilight could have sworn she saw slits in Luna's eyes. The princess of the night continued. "How dare you? How can you say she would agree to such an atrocity?" Luna put her hoof on the table and raised herself up. She spread her wings outward, her eyes boring into Twilight's. "How can you use her name to reason such a heinous act while she is no longer present to speak as such? She would never use such terrible ways to meet Equestria's needs. She would never dream it, less allow it."

Tears pooled up beneath her eyes, betraying the anger in them. "I believed you knew her well, nearly as well as me. I believed you would preserve her name, would never allow it to be tainted by such vain speech. But I appear to have been mistaken. You were quick to use her name to justify yourself. You have disgraced it, trod upon it, with nary a thought as to the pony who once bore it." Twilight was quivering in her seat, seemingly pressed against it by the mere sight of Luna.

Luna stopped and caught her breath some. She dropped her voice down below her royal voice, down to barely above a whisper. "You are nothing like her. I give you but one warning, Twilight Sparkle. Do not tarnish her name. I shall not have it. You have my word."

With that, Luna swiftly left the table, slamming the door as she left the room. Spike cautiously got up, peeking over the edge to see if it was clear. Twilight stared after Luna, lost for words. She was sweating, still shaking slightly. Luna's plate still had an uneaten hayburger. Levitating the plate, Twilight hesitantly got up. "I'll... I'll go talk to her."

"Are you sure?" Spike said. Twilight didn't say anything. She gave Spike a weak smile and walked out of the room.

"Luna?" Twilight knocked on the door. "Are you doing alright?" After not hearing anything, she knocked again. "Luna, are you in there?"

"I would like some time alone," Luna replied.

"Come on, Luna. I just want to talk."

Luna said nothing. Twilight waited for a few moments before she opened the door. Luna was on her balcony, looking skyward. Hearing the door open, she quickly turned around. She scowled somewhat.

Twilight spoke quietly. "You didn't eat," Twilight set the plate on Luna's dresser. She pawed the ground. "I-I'm sorry... about all... that."

Luna sighed and walked inside. "You are forgiven. I, too, apologize. I did not mean to lose my temper with you. When I heard my sister's name, I just..." She hung her head.

Twilight walked towards Luna. "Are you alright, Luna?" Luna looked up, and Twilight saw that as a cue to go on. "You haven't been talking to me much, and that back there was the first time you've actually spoken to me in the past three days." Twilight stopped, expecting a reply. When Luna said nothing, she continued. "Why don't you talk to me anymore?" Luna winced. "What's going on, Luna? Do you not care, or—"

Luna looked at Twilight, hurt. "You think I care not?"

"Well, sometimes, yeah." Luna looked back down. Twilight continued. "Spike and Starlight are always with me, but you're always gone, and I know you aren't sleeping or dreamwalking."

Luna squinted at Twilight. "I am the one heading our forces, Twilight, as well as controlling all foreign affairs, as you with domestic. I dreamwalk with our generals, lest such dire information be lost with a stray letter or messenger. I have not the time to sleep, let alone visit everypony with a nightmare."

"Oh, don't give me that," said Twilight, some of her ire returning. "The air forces are just sitting at the coast—"

"Preparing!" Luna sighed and shook her head. "Twilight," she said wearily, "we have already argued once today. I would rather not have another."

"Alright then," Twilight said. "Tell me something. What were you planning on doing just now?"

"Hm?"

"Right now. What were you going to do?" Luna opened her mouth, but Twilight kept talking. "I mean, it's gotta be important for you to skip dinner, right? But I'm not sure, because to me, it looked like you were just sitting out there feeling sorry for yourself."

"I just needed some time to—"

"To what, sulk some more?" Luna again began to speak, but Twilight kept going, her voice gradually rising. "No, you listen! You can't just mope! We have jobs to do! You don't think I want to sit and cry? Well I do! My brother is dead, and Celestia is d-dead, and Cadence and Flurry might as well be dead, a-and I don't know where Rainbow is, and we're at war and everypony's dying a-a-and the least you could do is support me, damn it! We're at war, Luna! War! War! We're all scared!" She took a quivering step towards her, quieting her voice. "I'm scared. I can't do this alone. I need support too."

Luna looked down. "I am sorry, Twilight. I truly am. I want to help, but I..." She looked back up to see Twilight almost seething. "But to ask of me would be asking for support from a crumbling pillar."

"Yeah, well, that's better than falling to the ground alone!"

"Even if it were to fall upon you as it fell?"

"At least the pillar would have been there to help!"

"And you have not asked why the pillar crumbled."

Twilight looked at Luna, exasperated. "It's a pillar!"

Luna grew quieter. "Perhaps the load upon it is too great already."

She stomped. "Enough of the damn pillar! You can't just lock yourself in here and cry. What good is that going to do you, or us, or anypony?"

"You care not why I cannot support you?"

Twilight groaned. "Fine! Go ahead! Tell me all about it!"

"You already know why."

"What, Celestia? Oh, right, right," Twilight mocked. "You feel 'responsible' for it all?"

Luna stopped for a moment. "You... you trivialize—"

"Because it is trivial!" Luna's ears drooped, and Twilight scoffed. "What is with you? You always act like you're the worst pony alive. Did you start the fires? Did you kill thousands of ponies? Did you steal the Heart? Did you start a war? Did you kill Celestia? No! So stop acting like you did!" Luna stared at Twilight and then at the floor. She didn't speak. Twilight, fuming, turned to the door. She put her hoof on the doorknob when she heard a whimper from Luna.

"I believe I killed her," Luna said quietly. "Or, at the very least, I feel I had a hoof in her death. I had a nightmare, or a vision, that day. It was a warning I tried to heed, but ultimately I did not. I was idle, hoping foolishly it would not come to pass. When it did..." She took a shaky breath. "When my vision came to pass, I did nothing. Nothing. I ran. I left her. How am I not responsible for her death? How can I not feel this gall of bitterness?"

Luna sighed. "Let me ask you something, Twilight Sparkle. Do you believe I want to be here? There is not an hour that passes where I do not wish I could have died that night. I have cowardice to thank for my survival, and I curse myself for it. I do not care whether I could have died either in place of her or with her. I wish I died instead of lived. I do not want to cry or care any more. But I am alive." Her breath grew shaky. "I am alive, and I have to deal with this guilt, these hardships, alone. And, for the time being, you do too."

She looked down, her ears flat to her head. "I am sorry I cannot help you—truly, I am—but I know if we each do our duties to their fullest, we will be okay. I want to help you, I really do, but..." She looked at Twilight. "One cannot save somepony who drowns while they themselves drown."

Twilight sighed, frowning. "Are you done?"

Luna stared at her, shocked. She closed her eyes, a tear running down her trembling cheek. In silence, she ran to the balcony and flew off into the evening air.

"You forgot to raise the moon," said Twilight, annoyed. She glanced outside. The moon slowly rose, a soft blue halo surrounding it. Twilight ran to the balcony, looking for Luna. Not seeing her, she ran out of the room towards the other side of the castle, forgetting the plate of food.

She opened another balcony which had an open view of the evening sun. She lit her horn and attempted to lower it, but she barely moved it a few degrees downward before giving up. Rubbing her head, she murmured to herself about her magic. But suddenly the sun began to move, a faint blue ring surrounding it, coaxing it below the horizon. Soon darkness fell across Ponyville, and Twilight grumbled, trotting back inside.