22
Peaks
By the time Soarin' and Gabby emerged from the bunker with the other griffons and pegasi, the sun had finally set beyond the sea. Thunderhead now slowly floated near the mountaintops, so their journey was shorter than before. The griffons were astonished that a cloud so large and complex could be fashioned by hooves, and Soarin' couldn't help but be amused by their quiet conversations. When he told the group there were two more just like it right up against Griffonstone's coast, a young griffon proudly proclaimed Equestria would win for sure.
Word spread quickly through Thunderhead of the refugees, and there were hundreds of pegasi waiting outside for the new arrivals. Those who were less welcoming kept to themselves. Rather hastily, the warmer pegasi showed the refugees to the mess hall, and the griffons ate heartily. The whole atmosphere of the supercloud became jovial and light. After idly talking for a while with the griffons, Soarin' and Gabby finally managed to split off from them. They returned to the table where they had their dinner to find it vacant.
"Huh," Soarin' said. "I thought they'd be here."
Gabby nodded. "Gilda and... um..."
"Dash. Rainbow Dash." He scanned the mess hall again and huffed softly.
"Maybe she's showing Gilda around the base."
"Hm. That does sound like her." He chuckled. "While we're looking for them, I might as well give you a tour, too."
"Yeah. Oh, wait." Gabby pointed to the far end of the room. "There's Gilda." She was sitting alone, drumming her claws on a table.
Soarin' furrowed his brows. "So where's Dash?"
Gabby shrugged. "Let's ask her." The two started flying over the griffons and pegasi when Soarin' noticed with a touch of worry how cross Gilda looked. They landed, and before either could utter a word, Gilda stood and pulled Gabby over to herself.
"Hey!" Gabby tore herself loose. "What are you doing?"
Gilda's eyes flashed. "We're going, aren't we?"
"Well yeah, but you don't have to grab me. What's gotten you all riled up?" Gilda grunted and started walking away, motioning Gabby to follow. Gabby frowned. "Hey!"
"What?!" Gilda barked.
"What is going on with you?"
"None of your damn business!"
Gabby groaned. "Fine. At least tell Soarin' where Rainbow is." Gilda glared at Gabby and then at Soarin', saying nothing.
"Where's Dash, Gilda?" Soarin' asked. She began walking away again, and Soarin' stomped a hoof on the ground. "Hey! Where is she?"
Gilda glanced back. "Heard you the first time, idiot."
Soarin' grit his teeth, stepping forward. "Where is she?"
Gilda stopped, turning around. "Y'know what? Since you can't seem to take a hint, why don't you go and look for her yourself? I'm sure she'd love to share what she did." She glanced at Gabby. "Come on. Let's get out of here." She turned around and walked to the rest of the griffons. Gabby looked at Soarin' and mouthed the word "sorry" before following Gilda.
Fuming, Soarin' walked through a door out of the mess hall. As he walked, his frustration slowly gave way to worry. Where was Dash? Was she okay? Was she as angry as Gilda? Thinking that the locker room would be the furthest Dash could get from Gilda, Soarin' started winding his way to the opposite end of Thunderhead.
As he passed by other pegasi, he would ask if they had seen her, to which all replied they hadn't. He eventually found himself in the last hallway, which curved around the edge of the supercloud. He hoped she was there; there were too many places outside she could be. Perhaps she was in bed, now that he thought about it. He sighed. He didn't know what he was going to say to her. He didn't know what sort of problem she and Gilda had, let alone how he could help.
There was movement out of the corner of his eye, and he stopped to look through a window. The griffons, flanked by a dozen or so pegasi, were flying westward. He found Gilda and Gabby towards the front and watched them. Gilda still wore a hard expression, and Gabby, along with another griffon, seemed to be talking with her. Soon, the three vanished in the whole, and the flock began to shrink into the horizon.
"I don't get it," Soarin' muttered. "They were fine when I left."
Rainbow sat alone in the Wonderbolts' locker room, slowly taking her uniform off. Tears fell onto pieces of her armor, but she made no effort to wipe them clean. She kicked off a boot, her last bit of uniform, onto a pile in front of her. She stared at the grey mess and then at her grey hooves. A pair of eyes flashed in Rainbow's mind, and now it didn't matter whose they were. She started to sob, rolling on her side and burying her head in her hooves.
Why didn't she stop? Why didn't she stop when she had won? Why did she have to kill her, and in such a horrid way? She could have just knocked Gwen out or scared her into fleeing. Maybe if she had just left Gwen alone, she could have actually saved somepony. Spitfire might be alive, and Fleetfoot, and Misty Fly, and so many others. How could she have let herself give in to that horrid impulse?
Gwen's blood was on her hooves, forever. And now Gilda knew. Why did Gwen have to be her sister? Rainbow scolded herself. Why should it be different if Gwen was Gilda's sister or not? Rainbow still killed. She tried again to vindicate herself, reminding herself of Gwen's misdeeds, but they did not blot out her own. She just wanted to vanish, to feel no longer this horrid weight in her heart.
"Dash?"
Rainbow shakily gasped, looking at the door. Soarin' stood, his front leg frozen mid-step, with a look of worry on his face. Rainbow hastily made to stand, but she instead tripped over her own wing and fell back down. Tearing up again, she curled up into a ball on the floor.
"Dash," Soarin' said. He was next to her now. She looked up and saw his extended hoof. Sniffing, she took it and shakily got to her hooves. She looked at him for a moment before closing her eyes and turning her head downwards.
With a gentle hoof, he lifted her chin up. "What happened?"
Rainbow stared at him for a few moments and sighed. "I killed Gilda's sister," she said quietly.
Soarin' gasped, letting her go. "Oh. Oh, Dash, I..." Words seemed to fail him.
"Her name was Gwen." Rainbow continued in a voice barely above a whisper. "It was the night we were ambushed. She started attacking me from out of nowhere. She was smaller than me. We fought for a while." Rainbow gestured to her scars. "She gave me this. There was this point where she knocked the wind out of me and circled me, gloating. She said she was the one that killed Princess Celestia. She kept saying how easy it was and how pitiful Celestia was. I was... so angry.
"I beat her right after that. I won. I could've just left her alone after that, but I didn't. I ki..." Her heart felt like lead. "I killed her, strangled her with my own hooves. I didn't realize what I was doing until after I did it. I keep trying to tell myself that what I did was right. I know what I did what right. I know I'm right, but inside, I can't feel I'm right. She killed Celestia, and she killed other ponies, too, but how am I any different from her? How can I forgive myself?"
"Oh, Dash," Soarin' said soothingly, a hoof on her shoulder. "You're good. You're a good pony. I know you, and you would never, never kill in cold blood. You aren't like that griffon, like Gwen. What you did was justified."
"I know!" she yelled, startling Soarin'. He backed off, and she half-heartedly reached for him again before putting her hoof down. "I know," she repeated quietly. "I know I'm right, but it's so hard to forgive myself, and now Gilda knows, and I know she's never going to forgive me for what I've done. What am I supposed to do?"
Soarin' seemed to juggle thoughts in his head before he sighed. "I know what that's like."
It was Rainbow's turn to be confused. "What?"
"I know how it feels when you can't forgive yourself and... when..." He quieted. "When you don't know if others ever will." He looked down, scratching one hoof with another, and took a deep breath. "Remember when you told me what Spitfire said to you, about how you were the new captain of the Wonderbolts?" She nodded. "Did you ever wonder... why I agreed? Why I didn't hesitate or argue with you about it?"
"I still think about it, actually. Why?"
"Uh, well, back at the ambush, I..." When Rainbow's face fall, he sighed, and his voice grew quieter. "I... I r..." He cleared his throat. Rainbow turned her head to one side. He mumbled something under his breath, but she caught it.
"You... ran?"
"Yes!" He blurted. "I... I ran!" He spat it out as if it were bitter in his mouth. "I got ambushed by a big griffon, and I was able to hold him off for a while, but then he got the upper hoof on me, and then another griffon showed up, and h-he had a spear, and I-I ran for my life, ran and didn't look back."
He looked at Rainbow as if he were pleading. "When I finally got back to Thunderhead, th-they asked me where the others were. I-I couldn't look them in the eye. I just said that they'd be along soon. But th-then nothing happened. I waited and waited and waited for what felt like hours, but n-n-nopony showed up." He looked away from Rainbow. "I was worried that you died because of me, because I ran. I thought I lost you."
He turned to her again, smiling slightly. "But then you came back. You came back." His smile faded. "But then I saw what they did to you... a-and to Spitfire, and those dog tags. I-I..." His voice began to break, so he took a breath to steady himself. "You were okay, but I felt like a... a traitor. I betrayed our team, abandoned them, left them for dead. I left you for dead. I felt like I got kicked in the gut knowing that you stuck around and looked for the others. I could've helped, but I was too d-damn scared to. A-and whenever I see your face, your scars, I—" His voice broke, and he stopped for a moment, his eyes closed. He sniffed, continuing quietly. "I can't help but think that's my fault, and it reminds me how much I screwed up that night."
He looked at the ground, dejected. "That's why, when you told me Spit wanted you to be the captain, I agreed. I can't be the captain. Cowards can't be captains." He quieted his voice. "I tried to tell you so many times, Dash, but..." He sniffed and looked at her as though he were forcing himself to. "I didn't want to lose you, too. I can't lose you. I care about you. I—" He cut himself off, snapping his mouth shut, and again looked down.
Rainbow didn't know what to say nor feel. She didn't dare think Soarin' was capable of cowardice. Yet, when she thought back to that night, she couldn't think of any other reason. He was back early, with minor injuries and without other tags. He didn't look for anypony else? He cared about his own neck more than his team? She clenched her teeth, almost seething. How dare he run? Ponies could've lived if he had helped. How could he have done this?
At an epiphany, overwhelming sympathy and compassion washed over her. He did know how she felt. He was afraid to admit what he'd done. He had kept that secret for months. She knew how terrible it was to hold back guilt for so long. She couldn't help but feel for him. Thinking about her own sorrows, she knew exactly what he needed. She slowly walked over to Soarin' and hugged him. He gasped and stood completely rigid. He shook slightly, then collapsed to his haunches, sobbing.
"I-I-I'm so sorry," he cried, "I-I'm so, so sorry, Dash. I'm s-sorry."
"I know," she said calmly. "I know, Soarin', and... I forgive you."
"You—?" Soarin' choked up. He hugged her tightly, smiling weakly and crying onto her shoulder. "Thank you! Oh, thank you, thank you..." His thanks and apologies soon trailed off into quiet crying. Nothing more was needed, Rainbow thought, not even so much as a reprimand. What was done was done—there was no changing the past—and his conscience had punished him enough. They both needed to get over what happened.
Soarin' soon calmed down and backed away from Rainbow. He wiped a tear from his face and sniffed. "Sorry. You were dealing with your own thing, and I came in and—"
"No," Rainbow said. "It was good. It helped. Besides, yours is more important right now. Gilda and I can work stuff out later."
Soarin' smiled. "Thanks, Dash. I—" He stopped and glanced behind him, his ears perked up. Rainbow heard it too: yelling, somewhere.
The two walked over to the door and stuck their heads out. Pegasi were scrambling, running or flying through the hallway. One noticed the two and stopped, panting. "Griffons," she said. "They're attacking us and the refugees." She ran off, and the two looked at each other with wide eyes.
By the time Rainbow and Soarin' got outside, there was a battle covering half of Thunderhead in a shell. Further west, barely distinguishable from the night sky, there was a second, smaller brawl. Everything was softly lit by a half moon and a handful of early stars.
"Well," said Soarin', "there're your griffons. What should we do?"
Rainbow quickly looked at the distant battle, squinting. Were Gilda and the others okay? Rainbow shook her head. "It seems under control around here," she said, not really looking. "Let's go help the refugees." Soarin' nodded, and the two sped westward. They weaved their way through the duels happening all around them and into the open night air. The noise coming from the supercloud had only just faded away when the sounds from the refugee fight became prominent.
Suddenly, Rainbow was grabbed from below by a much larger griffon, taking her up and away. Soarin' turned and shouted to her but too was tackled and carried off. Rainbow was squeezed to the point she couldn't breathe. Kicking, she managed to squirm her way out of the griffon's grasp and put distance between herself and him. He made chase, and, still trying to catch her breath, Rainbow flew up.
She knew she could never overpower him by herself—he had to be twice her size. She scanned around for Soarin' or somepony who was free, but everypony was caught up with their own duels. Racking her brain, she tried to remember what she had both learned and taught during the month of preparation. One lesson surfaced; generally, pegasi can out-climb griffons. Pegasi, thanks to their innate magical ability, were better-suited to high altitudes than their chimerical counterparts. If she could climb high enough, the griffon might realize his disadvantage and disengage, or, possibly, pass out—she would accept either.
Checking her six o'clock, she saw his looming figure. Pushing upwards, she smiled. "Alright," she said to herself, "let's see what you got." She increased her speed, checking the horizons occasionally to make sure she wasn't arcing back towards the ground. She could already feel the air cool down, but her uniform did its job well.
She cleared the last of the cloud layer, and still the griffon tailed her. "Come on," she muttered, "give up already." Her instincts told her to level out and try to out-maneuver the griffon, but she couldn't allow herself to let up now. She checked the griffon again—still following. "C'mon!" What if he out-lasted her? She shook her head. Pegasus magic was on her side. She could do this. However, the air was thinning faster than she thought it would, and she already was slowing down. She shook her head and pushed on. She wouldn't die, not now, not like this.
The air rapidly turned frigid around her, outstripping her uniform's capabilities. She checked below; she could clearly see his eyes. She regretted climbing now, but her fate was sealed. Pumping her wings, with a renewed sense of urgency, she continued to climb. "C'mon... c'mon..." she panted. Fear flooded her light-headed mind. She was going to pass out. She knew it. She was going to pass out and land right in that griffon's claws—or, perhaps, he would let her fall to her death.
"C'mon..." She could feel her lungs starving. Her vision became tunneled, and she blinked in hopes to refocus. "C'mon... come... on..." She had to stop, to dive, or else she would certainly die. She closed her eyes and threw her wings out, reversing direction, awaiting the griffon to grab her and a desperate fight to ensue.
She opened her eyes. The griffon was gone. She breathed out and allowed herself to dive and rest her wings. Taking in great gulps of air, she searched the sky around her. She quickly found him right in front of her—falling, tumbling down to earth. He had gave out before her, probably mere moments before she had quit. She passed him in her dive, and she could tell he was out cold. She closed her eyes again. "Oh, thank Celestia."
As she pulled out of her dive high above the main skirmish, she watched the griffon's body plummet past her. He wasn't going to wake up in time, she thought grimly. Shaking her head, her thoughts turned to Soarin'. She dove again, closing the height gained from the duel. Leveling out again a hundred feet above the battle, she leveled out, scanning the battlefield.
She quickly spotted a grey speck below in the moonlight and recognized it as Soarin'. He was being chased by a griffon and losing. Turning upside down, she tucked in her wings and plummeted towards him. She closed the gap quickly, ramming the pursuant griffon hard. The move left her stunned for a moment, but the griffon had become limp, falling through a small cloud.
"Thanks!" Soarin' yelled, flying next to her again. "Really saved my hide."
"No problem!" she said.
A cry pierced the air from somewhere nearby, making Rainbow's ears ring, and it was repeated over around Thunderhead. The Pride who remained scattered, all shouting "Retreat!" to those still fighting. A few pegasi took off in pursuit but were called back by their flight leads. Almost as fast as they came, the Pride left, seemingly becoming the night shadows themselves. The griffons who remained were the refugees, though they were far fewer in number than before.
"How the hell?" Soarin' said, still out of breath. "Where did they go?"
"Well..." Rainbow shrugged. "It's their land. They know where to hide."
"There you are!" Gilda shouted. The two pegasi looked around to see the griffon flying to them.
Rainbow sighed in relief. "I'm glad you made it."
"Where's Gabby?" asked Soarin'. "She alright?"
"Mhm," Gilda said with a nod. "She's checking in on everyone else." Suddenly, she jolted, her eyes growing wide. "Wait, wait, hold on." Gilda hovered over their heads, searching for something.
"What's up, Gilda?" Rainbow asked, trying not to sound concerned.
Gilda was breathing quickly. "Where's Greta?"
"Who?"
"Greta!" Gilda shouted. She shook her head, muttering. "Sh-she's got light green feathers, a-and her coat is sort of maroon." Her breath shuddered. "She has a scarf, and..." She became choked up and hid her face.
"She's probably around here somewhere," Soarin' reassured.
"I don't see her here," Gilda said. "I don't see her, I don't..."
"C'mon, Gilda," said Rainbow, putting a hoof on her shoulder, "let's get back to Thunderhead. You need to re—"
"No!" Greta yelled, smacking Rainbow's hoof away. "We have to find her! We have to!" As Greta continued to rant, not bothering to wipe away tears, Rainbow and Soarin' looked at one another somberly and knowingly. The refugees were slowly being led back to Thunderhead by pegasi, leaving the three behind. "We have to..." finished Gilda weakly.
"Gilda," said Soarin' softly, "we'll try to find her, but I'm not so sure we will." A flash of anger appeared on Gilda's face before going back to fear.
Rainbow gave Soarin' a look, and he quieted. "Let's go to the other refugees," she said. "You can all rest tonight, but tomorrow, you'll all head out again for Equestria."
"No," Gilda said quietly. "I'm staying. I'm going to find her."
Soarin' stuttered. "No, no, you're going. We can't have—"
"I'm staying!" Gilda asserted. She looked between the two, the anger again subsiding. She looked at Rainbow, a desperate look in her eyes. "Please?"
Rainbow glanced at Soarin', who shrugged. She sighed. "We'll see what we can do, Gilda. Until then," she gestured back inside, "let's meet with the others."
Gilda stared at her for a moment, her composure wavering. Her eyes darted down, and her head followed. "Okay," she said weakly.