Taishiro Week Day 6 – "If We Wait" [Tri]

Confession

Koushirou sat on the edge of his chair, hunched over his computer. His nose was inches away from the screen. Surely, he must be close to finding a cure for the infected digimon. But then, he had been telling himself that for the past ten hours…

Knock! Knock! Knock!

The sudden rapping on the door made Koushirou squeak and lose his already precarious balance. He fell off and the swivel chair rolled against the wall.

"Digi digi!" Taichi's voice rang out from the opposite side of the door. It was Koushirou's old password for the Chosen Children.

Koushirou grumbled from his awkward position on the floor. He grabbed the desk leg and pulled himself back to his feet. "I put a 'Do not disturb' sign on the door, Taichi! And I know you can read!"

"Come on, man. You're supposed to say 'Mon mon' and let me inside." The door knob jiggled.

"I'm close to finding an answer and I absolutely cannot be disturbed right now, not even by you. So please leave." Koushirou sat down and readied his fingers over the keys.

"I brought you food from your mom!"

Koushirou froze. His fingers dangled in the air.

"She said that she's been trying to call you all day, but she couldn't get through to your phone. So she called me and asked me to bring you a meal. She seemed worried about bothering you. 'Course I wasn't worried about that—"

Koushirou swung open the door to face the taller boy. Taichi blinked in surprise. He held a green bento box in his hands. Koushirou immediately recognized the comforting smell of his mother's cooking.

"Come inside," Koushirou said. Taichi obliged, and Koushirou shut the door behind him. He sighed. "I made Mom worry…"

"You're making everyone worry! I texted you this morning too! You never showed up to school."

Koushirou shrugged. "There are more important things than school."

"I know, but—"

"School isn't going to teach me how to save our digimon partners. It's never taught me anything useful except for when to stay quiet and how to listen to boring people." Koushirou snatched the bento box from Taichi's hands and walked back to sit in his chair. "My parents don't worry about my grades anyway. Neither does the teacher. Everyone already knows I'm smart…" Koushirou sounded grim as he stared at his computer. He had already lost his train of thought from earlier. "Supposedly," he mumbled.

"Hey…" Taichi sounded unsure of himself. It was unusual for Koushirou to talk so bitterly. He grabbed an armchair and dragged it across the room to Koushirou's desk, so that they could sit side-by-side. "Don't say that. You're the smartest person I know. Of course we're not worried about your grades; we're worried about your mental health."

"Right." Koushirou regretted his harsh tone of voice. He looked away from the screen to his mother's box, and opened it up. The food was artfully arranged according to its colors, just as he always liked since he was little. "What did my mom say to you?"

"Why don't you ask her yourself?" Taichi nudged Koushirou's phone on the desk towards him.

"Oh right…" Koushirou turned his cell phone back on. He saw that there were a half dozen messages waiting for him. He ignored them and called his home number. His mother answered on the first ring.

"Koushirou?" The ache in her voice broke his heart.

"Hi Mom."

"I've been trying to call you all day!"

"I know. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Don't worry about little old me. Did Taichi deliver your food?"

"Yes, he's here now. Thank you for thinking of me! You didn't have to do that."

"Of course I did! I'm your mother."

"Mom…"

"How are you feeling? Your forehead felt feverish this morning."

"You're exaggerating. Mom, you know that you're welcome in the office any time, right? It belongs to you and Dad. I won't enforce silly passwords on you."

"I know! I know. I just…I don't understand everything about the digimon, and I figured you'd be more likely to listen to a friend who did. I understand that you're doing important work to save Tentomon, and I don't want to get in the way."

"You never get in the way of anything. Never."

"I want you to come home and sleep."

"Oh—but—Mom, I can't! I'm so close. I can camp out here when I'm tired. The office is a better work environment with no distractions, and I can keep an eye on the digimon." Koushirou's eyes flickered to the digimon on the screen; they had all fallen asleep.

Mrs. Izumi sighed. Koushirou realized that he had called his mother a 'distraction,' and he felt mortified.

"Wait, I didn't mean—!"

"Koushirou, it's all right. But you will come home tomorrow. Is that clear?"

"Yes Mom."

"Good. I'm glad."

"Thank you again for making me dinner."

"You're welcome! There's a little extra, so you can share with Taichi. Listen to him if he says you're overworking yourself."

"Mom—!"

"I love you, honey. So, so much. And I'm so proud of you."

"I love you too, Mom. More than anything else in the multiverse."

Mrs. Izumi chuckled. "Good night."

"Night Mom." Koushirou ended the call and sunk in his chair. He glanced at Taichi next to him, who was staring determinedly at the ceiling. "It's fine. I don't mind that you overheard. It's only you," Koushirou said to him.

Taichi smiled at the ceiling, but he turned serious when he looked back at his friend. He reached his hand over Koushirou's forehead.

"I don't have a fever!" Koushirou said defensively.

"Hm. I guess not…Unfortunately, I don't carry a thermometer on my person at all times, like Jou."

"Does Jou actually do that?"

"Yep. He'll stuff it in your mouth if you look the slightest bit sick, or if you're just being annoying."

Koushirou grinned. "I can picture which way you found out. But I'm not ill. My mother just worries too much." Koushirou slid the bento box between them and handed Taichi a pair of chopsticks. It wasn't until he took his first bite that he realized how hungry he was, and he started wolfing down his rice and tofu.

"Mm!" Taichi picked at the food slowly, somehow restraining himself since he had already eaten dinner. "Your mom's a great cook."

"Thank you. I mean—haha, I'm not my mom."

Taichi's smile widened. "You two are perfect for each other."

"What do you mean?"

"You and your mom. Both of you are always so worried about each other. And super polite about it! It's easy to see where you got your nice genes."

Koushirou hesitated, pondering his chopsticks.

"You always drop everything to talk to her. And your dad." Taichi shrugged, sensing that he was embarrassing his friend. "I'm just happy for you! You're kinda difficult to read, so it's a relief to me that you get along so well with your parents. At least I know you're always in good hands."

"You think I'm difficult?" Koushirou's voice wobbled.

"Agh—" Taichi fumbled. "I mean—it's only difficult for me! I'm not always sensitive, you know."

"I know."

"Ha." Taichi cleared his throat. "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm glad your mom cooked you something, because I know you wouldn't have opened the door just for me!"

Koushirou swallowed. Taichi was probably only teasing him. Taichi liked to joke; he was good at lightening the mood that way. But Koushirou wasn't sure if it was merely a joke, and that was embarrassing. To think that Taichi could be his best friend for a decade, and Koushirou still had trouble reading him…

"I would have let you in eventually," Koushirou mumbled.

"Thanks!" Taichi chuckled.

"I also find you difficult to understand. And I'm also insensitive. And I also worry about not being your best optional friend for you to talk to. So you shouldn't be embarrassed around me."

Taichi laughed loudly. "Thanks!" He set his chopsticks down and leaned his elbow on the desk, and his chin on his palm. He had an easy smile and warm brown eyes.

Koushirou's heart did a somersault and he swiftly re-focused on gobbling his food, keeping his eyes down.

"Koushirou, you're literally the easiest person for me to talk to. You're the best listener of all my friends. I try to be the same for you. I know I'm kind of loud though." He laughed again, infectious. It drew a smile on Koushirou's face. "My life is an open book for you. I can tell you everything."

"Thank you…" Koushirou said quietly. He finished the last few morsels in the box. "Everything?"

"Everything! No secrets allowed with you."

Koushirou paused, knowing that he was about to be impertinent. "Do you have any secrets right now?"

"Right now? Uh…" Taichi stroked his chin. "Trying to think of something interesting…I kissed Meiko on the cheek today."

Koushirou's heart thudded. "Oh." He smiled. "Does that mean you have a crush on her?"

"Maybe." He giggled. "Actually, Mimi kissed her on the cheek first, and then I did it afterwards—impulsively—I don't think she minded? I hope she didn't mind. It was sudden. But—yeah, I think I like her? She's got, you know, big boobs."

"Big boobs?"

"Oof, don't tell Sora I said that. I meant I like her nice personality. I like nice people. Like you!—And, you know, Sora. And Yamato. Well, he's not nice. I guess I only like Yamato for his sweet ass and fancy hair."

Koushirou started giggling in spite of himself.

"That's not much of a secret!" Taichi continued. "You already knew I was a doofus. Do you like anyone?"

Koushirou blushed. "I only fall for people who are way out of my league."

"Like, beneath you?"

Koushirou snorted; then he buckled over in hysterics, laughing and wheezing. He couldn't sit up straight for a full minute. Taichi joined him, happy for the rare sighting of a loudly overjoyed Koushirou.

Koushirou hugged himself and leaned back in his chair, breathing deeply. "…Sure."

"That's a bad habit. Just telling you. As your friend."

"Thanks for the warning, doofus."

Taichi slapped the desk and chortled.

Koushirou closed his eyes and smiled dreamily. After a long day, he felt so happy. So relaxed…At least, he should feel happy. He knew, objectively, that this was a happy situation. And yet there was a familiar anxiety, creeping in the back of his mind…Koushirou peeked over his shoulder. The digimon were still asleep.

"What's up?" Taichi asked.

"Actually, there is something I'd like to tell you." Koushirou whispered.

Taichi leaned closer. "Is it about our partners?" He scrunched his brow, preparing to listen to a complicated lecture.

"No. It's…about…me." Koushirou swallowed. He met Taichi's eyes. Taichi smiled warmly and nodded. But did he also look nervous? Was it right for Koushirou to suddenly change the topic to something serious? It shouldn't be this difficult to talk to his oldest friend.

Koushirou screwed up his courage.

"I'm adopted," he said.

"Oh!" Taichi's eyes widened. Whatever he had been expecting Koushirou to say, it wasn't that. He opened and closed his mouth, unsure how to respond. "I didn't know. You always look so perfect—Wait, forget I said that, uh—How do you feel about that?"

"I feel fine." Koushirou exhaled. It was like a burden had been lifted from his shoulders. "It's not a big deal. Nothing's changed. My parents are still the same. I'm the same. I'm sorry that I never told you."

"Why would you apologize for that?"

"Because…" Koushirou's face flushed. "You're my best friend and you tell me everything. I've wanted to tell you so many times, but I…I kept panicking. I don't know why. I'm sorry. I know that you worry about intimidating me and Sora. It's not you. It's me. I-I don't know why I'm like this. Especially after you told me about Hikari and the hospital! It wasn't fair to you, that you told me your secret, and I n-never…"

"Hey." Taichi grasped Koushirou's hand. Koushirou stopped babbling. "It's okay. I'm not angry at you. Just surprised. Are you sure you feel fine?"

Koushirou nodded. "Yes…" It was hard to look at his eyes, so Koushirou stared at Taichi's hand instead, brown and calloused, fingers wrapped tightly around his own. "Well, I wasn't always fine. I was lonely, and…I think it's part of the reason I'm so quiet all the time. My adopted parents didn't tell me the truth until I was nine. It was right before we fought Vamdemon, actually. But I had figured out the truth years earlier. Because, you know, I'm so nosy…" Koushirou smiled weakly. "I guess that's why I took so long to tell you too. I take after them."

"You didn't owe me the truth," Taichi said. "That's awful that you had to wait so long for them."

"I don't blame them! They're very good parents! The best anyone could ask for. I—maybe I used to blame them, a little, but everything worked out. We're much closer now."

Taichi stroked his fingers. "Good. I understand that feeling…Do you know about your biological parents?"

"Yes. They're dead."

"I'm so sorry."

"It was a car crash. I was the only one who survived." Koushirou stopped talking as Taichi let go of his hand. Then he felt Taichi wrap his arms around his back and pull him into a hug. Koushirou sighed and leaned on the boy's chest, wishing he could melt like butter on toast.

Taichi eventually let go and sat back down. "I'm glad that you're alive."

"Thanks." Koushirou's heart skipped a beat and he continued. "I always imagined this conversation a little different. I thought that I'd tell you in my room. I have their old things, and I wanted to show you. There's a photo album, and their wedding rings, and some of their old books. They were college professors," he explained.

Taichi grinned. "Of course they were."

"Father was a mathematician, and Mother was an entomologist."

"What's that?"

"Entomology is the branch of zoology concerned with the study of insects."

Taichi almost laughed. "That's incredible!"

"Isn't it?" Koushirou smiled back at him.

"Are you sure you feel fine?"

"Yes. I feel much better now. Thank you for hugging me. You always ended up doing that when I imagined this conversation."

Taichi covered his mouth to stop himself from laughing. "Am I that predictable?"

"Yes—" Koushirou's eyes widened as Taichi stood up and grabbed his waist, sweeping him off his feet. He spun him around and hugged him fiercely. Koushirou was breathless.

"Did you ever imagine that?" Taichi whispered in his ear.

"No," Koushirou replied. He felt weightless, his feet dangling over the ground. "I'm not that imaginative…" He stared at Taichi's lips.

Taichi held him there, their faces inches apart. He breathed out slowly. Then he set his friend back on his chair and returned to the seat next to him, not meeting his eyes.

Koushirou checked the digimon again. They were still sleeping, although Koushirou wouldn't put it past Tentomon to be pretending. "I should get back to work."

"Right!" Taichi's head snapped back up. "I'll just sleep on the—"

"You should go home."

"But I can—"

"You're a distraction." Koushirou said bluntly.

"Heh. Yeah." Taichi smiled, embarrassed.

Koushirou felt bad. "We can talk more tomorrow."

"Yeah! I want to see your photo album! I'll pick you up in the morning."

"That's not necessary…" Koushirou faltered under the boy's irresistible smile. "Okay."

"I'll see you at nine. Ah—thank you for putting in so much effort. We'd be lost without you."

"I know."

Taichi grinned one last time and walked to the door.

"Bye Taichi."

"Good night." The distraction left.

Koushirou sighed, overwhelmed. He couldn't believe that he finally told him. He had waited so long. He replayed the memory in his mind of Taichi lifting him up and spinning around…

He shook his head and hunched over the computer, sitting on the edge of his chair.