Chapter Ninety Four: Don't Let Go
I think I'm losing my mind now
It's in my head, darling I hope
That you'll be here, when I need you the most
The Chain Smokers - Don't Let Me Down
Gabe had never seen Maggie look as fragile as she did at this very moment. Her chestnut brown waves fell away from those gaunt, pale features of hers as she lay unmoving amongst the white sheets, her palms laid flat on either side of her. There were an alarming amount of tubes and wires jutting out of her body, all connected to different machines on either side of her hospital bed. The room was silent except for the slow, steady beat of the life support machine echoing reassuringly though it. There was a dull ache in Gabe's throat, one he struggled to swallow past as he stood at the bottom of his sister's bed watching over her vulnerable form.
He had never seen Maggie like this. She was always fierce and vibrant, life just brimming out of her even in those darkest of moments. Right now she looked like a hollow shell of the person who she used to be. He knew what lay underneath the white sheets, how ruined Maggie really was. Will had tried to prepare him the best he could but the other man's words hadn't quite summerised the reality of the damage that had been done to his sister. She would carry the scars of tonight with her for the rest of her life. They were etched into her flesh like some cruel message. They would haunt her future, bringing back memories of the attack every time she looked into the mirror. Gabe knew a thing or two about living with yourself after something like that. The scars on his back were a testament of his father's abuse and he had learned to come to terms with them eventually. They may be a part of him but they didn't make him and he would make sure, come hell or high water that they wouldn't make Maggie.
The door behind him slid open quietly before he heard the click of Kim's low heeled boots on the linoleum behind him. He couldn't bring himself to speak, he couldn't even turn around to face her. He kept woeful blue eyes on his sister instead, trying to ignore the intense stinging sensation that burned behind his eye sockets. His hands came to rest upon the cool, metal bed frame as he hunched over it trying to pull himself back together. He wasn't the type of person to fall apart in the face of adversity, he was the strong one, the person who people depended on and right now Maggie needed him...
The tears were already flowing fast and thick, he could feel their warm, salty trails leaking from his eyes and over his defined cheekbones as he felt the bedframe bite at the palm of his hands.
It was too much, he thought. After all of that sickening fear, having Maggie back here under his watchful gaze was a relief. He had held everything together through the panic and the rage but his controlled facade was crumbling and he couldn't help but let out a choked sob.
Kim's gentle hand came to rest upon his left forearm, turning Gabe lightly towards her so she could see his tear-stained features. His watery blue eyes were brimming with a thousand unshed tears as he inhaled deeply, his firm cheeks reddening as he tried to grasp some sense of his composure. It made every single piece of Kim's heart break to see him like this. She stepped towards him, using her grip on his left arm to tug him towards her before she wrapped her arms around his desperate form and clasped him tightly. He fit against her as if this was the way they were always meant to be. He buried his face into the crook of her shoulder, embracing her comforting form as if she was his final pillar of strength. He craved that sanctuary like he never had and Kim was the only person who could give it to him. Being with her like this made him feel things that he had never expected to feel and right now she was his shelter against the storm that was whipping up inside of him. His rough, unshaven cheek rubbed against her slender throat as he closed his eyes and inhaled her unique citrus scent. He shuddered against her as the sorrow swept him up like a hurricane, dragging him under like a current as she held him.
Don't let go, he wanted to say. Just stay here with me.
He couldn't say the words he really felt, the ones that he kept to himself when he thought about Kim in the middle of the night when he lay in bed alone. He had never been with anyone before but he could imagine what it would be like with Kim, the compulsion to touch her was always there despite the fact she belonged to someone else. He hated himself for being so weak, for letting her see this side of him, however he understand the concept of home was where the heart is and his was with Kim all the way.
Gabe couldn't pin point when it had happened, only that it had. The notion went against everything he knew as a priest but embodied everything he felt as a man. He wanted to be with her despite the beliefs he upheld, his mentor had always said that God would test him and Gabe had never truly understood what he meant until this very moment. He withdrew from Kim almost unwillingly, the back of his hand rubbing at his red rimmed eyes before he forced his gaze away from the woman he loved and back to his sister lying unconscious in the hospital bed.
He couldn't face an existential crisis right now, he couldn't afford it. It would be worthless anyway, Kim was with Adam and Gabe would do nothing to endanger that. He wanted her to be happy and Adam could give her everything that he could not.
No, Gabe decided. He had to dedicate himself to his sister and to helping her get healthy again. Maggie was his focus once more and that's the way it had to be.
Hey guys, sorry I have been quiet. I have a lot of stuff going on in RL at the moment but I'll still be posting when I can.
Anime: It doesn't mean they'll be together in the second story :p Or that Mags will be off the vent. I feel for Antonio, he's so strong in crisis and I hate for him to feel guilty over something that he could stop. Kayla with a dog is just the best, wait until you meet Simba.
Soccer: I just wanna hug them both and tell them it will be ok. I can't risk the two of them together, Maggie has such a wonderful chemistry with everyone and that causes an issue with certain chars. Thank you so much for such a fab review.
Lauren: I loved writing the text chapters, they give me so much insight into the other chars. Maggie and Connor just have this mad chemistry whenever I put the two of them together. You'll have to wait to find out what happens with Antonio's op. So far the story is up to five chapters but they are coming thick and fast.
Nat: LMAO I didn't expect the text chapters to be so popular but everyone loves them. I took a long break from the two of them and they just kept coming back to me so I had to continue. Thank you for your kind words.