In Our Nature

by Saralis95

D/S AU. Written for the Glee Prompt Meme. Sebastian was born a sub but he's convinced something must have gone wrong with his results, so he fools everyone into believing he's a dom. That is until his sickness comes and he has to face the reality. He has to find a way to continue lying and make sure nobody finds out. And he needs help to get out of his sickness. Enter Kurt Hummel.

4. Chapter 4

Sebastian had spent all day long half-dizzy walking by the halls of Dalton. It was rather a sad perspective compared to the 48 hours prior to that. Well, maybe not so much the day before, but the day before that had certainly been a breath of fresh air. Damn he missed feeling like a normal person. This stupid sickness had been on for more than a week now and he literally wouldn't remember what it felt like to be sane if it wasn't for that little time after... the thing with Hummel.

So, he had used that time the best he could. Like, he had even tried, like really tried to find someone, because the clinic continued to be not an option. One or two of the pubs in Westerville that were well known for containing some bi-curious guys here and there had been his first thought but... that didn't finish very well. Turned out a guy saw him eye-fucking some fake-blond with a Justin Bieber haircut on the dance floor and he and two of his friends started throwing not so subtle threatening looks so he ended up leaving. Then he tried for Scandals, it wasn't of great help either.

And then it was over and he was again the needy idiot he'd been all week. It wasn't the same, thank God, but it still was affecting his concentration in class, not to mention his performance with the Warblers. Besides, his permanent erection was quite difficult to hide.

There was no way out. Soon he'd end up back in the hospital. He had masturbated so many times this week that he had already run dry and it didn't help him at all, it still hurt like hell. He was so desperate he even had tied himself his own feet to the desk in his room one afternoon while doing homework, he'd gone so far to try one of those virtual doms videos on youtube. Useless.

He was running out of options. The Warblers kept asking if he was okay and meddling in his affairs. Sebastian only wished they would stick their noses into their own business. He knew this was going to cost him his place in the team if he didn't do something soon. More than one teacher had sent him hints that if he was on drugs they wouldn't hesitate to inform his parents, and he has the impression that several other people thought alike from the way they looked at him from afar.

He hated having to resort to this. He really, really hated it. But he had no choice.

He looked at the two completely filled cups of coffee resting right in front of him on the table of the Lima Bean. Not that caffeine was something he really needed at this point, he had two days without more than four hours of uninterrupted sleep and actually, almost anything caused him to throw up lately. Things were getting worse and worse every day and he'd cursed the day he was born a sub so many times he didn't even have the spirit to do it again.

The bell over the door caught Sebastian's attention and as if it was a sign his... little friend, gave an excited jump in his pants when he saw Hummel entering the coffee shop wearing a pair of skintight leather pants that hugged his legs in a way that Sebastian would've been very contemplative at any other time, because although Hummel does make him lose his temper, he has to recognize that he hasn't seen an ass like that in years, not that he would ever admit it.

He held his breath as Kurt's eyes met his and tried not to look as desperate as he actually was as Kurt started walking in his direction.

This is the right thing, Sebastian told himself. Hummel was not a sadistic freak, or at least he didn't think he was, and he'd already promised not to tell anyone. He had nothing to lose. Besides his dignity.

"Sebastian" Kurt nodded his head in acknowledgment, stepping around the table to sit in the empty chair across from him. "If you don't mind could we do this quickly? I have a compromise later."

"Yes. Yes, of course. Umh… then, I went forward and ordered coffee for both of us. He pushed the cup of liquid almost boiling towards Kurt and Sebastian could see his expression twisting slightly at the edges as he took the cup and carried it to his mouth.

"Thanks," he said simply, looking suspiciously.

"First of all," Sebastian began, not quite sure how to explain his situation. "I want to thank you for agreeing to meet me here."

God, he was so desperate.

"Hmm," Kurt muttered with a small smirk on his lips. "You're being very nice, you haven't insulted me and you're actually being grateful. Good, I like it. What you want to ask me must be very important."

Sebastian frowned.

"Okay, you got me. The truth is I don't know how to start— "he cut himself. Kurt was looking at him in a way... it wasn't an expression Sebastian knew how to identify, his eyes were sad but at the same time, there was a kind of force on them. Not entirely unpleasant.

"How have you been?" The dom asked and Sebastian got momentarily confused by the change of conversation. His head wasn't entirely clear these days. He knew the question had a different significance coming from Kurt than anyone else, honestly, he never thought he could give a damn, but there was a sincerity in him that Sebastian didn't dare to question.

"A little disoriented to tell the truth; It has been a while since, well, you know ... "

"Three days" Kurt corrected.

"Yes, three days, I know. What we- well what you did, it..." hell he was a man, not the shy sub cheerleader that all the movies try to sell. "It helped, a lot, but only for a little more than a day."

"I told you it wouldn't be definitive, I also told you that the effect would be short."

"Yeah, I know, I know, but I didn't think it would be sooooo short" he grumbled a little angry about that fact. Kurt let go his defensive pose, but that didn't stop him from laying eyes on him. "I mean, after spending two hours handcuffed and with you over me I thought it should work for at least a week."

"Sebastian" Kurt exclaimed, exasperated, staring at the ceiling dramatically and raising his hands to his head. "I think you don't have an idea of what submitting to someone means; it's not just stay down and endure whatever comes, it's not about that. "

Well, that was exactly what it seemed to be for Sebastian.

"The point," he said, playing with the cup of coffee in his hands. "It's that ever since I'm... a little..."

"Sick" Kurt finished for him. "For something is called sickness, you know? You really didn't get someone to help you? I repeated it like a thousand times!"

"I tried, I swear," he defended himself. Kurt was upset, really, really upset. Sure, doms didn't like to be disobeyed, of course Kurt wouldn't be an exception. "I've been going to Scandals every night since then and it's impossible to find anyone." It wasn't technically true, he had gone to other places as well, but that was irrelevant. He continued quickly. "I even tried with one of 40, Hummel, 40! But you have to understand that the guy seemed crazy."

"Scandals?" Kurt questioned in a shout, prompting a couple of people to turn to look at them. "Scandals, the gay bar? Are you kidding me? Were you going to let a stranger dominate you? And in your first sickness? Are you crazy? Anything could have happened. It's not safe . Never, never do that again Sebastian!" He growled and now a couple of the baristas were watching too.

Sebastian felt a strange weight fall on him and suddenly he felt so, so sad. Humiliated, mortified, why is that he couldn't do anything right? Why had he to always be a disappointment for anyone who got in his way? Always, from the moment he was born, and now everyone could tell. He had always told him, no one would ever want him, no one would see him as nothing more than an object to be fucked and used to discard when they got bored of him. Trash, that's what he was.

"Seb-Sebastian, I- I'm sorry, I overreacted, it's not your fault, please look at me."

He looked up, afraid that what he was going to find were the disapproving eyes of his nightmares as a child, but instead he saw Kurt's compassionate blue eyes and he had to restrain himself to get carried away too much and talk more that he should.

God what was going on with him?

Sebastian tentatively opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by the sudden presence of a girl, between 18 and 22 years old, blonde and wearing an orange shirt under a blue apron, looking embarrassingly between him and Kurt, but finally getting to touch the dom's shoulder when he doesn't seem to notice her presence.

"Uhh, excuse me?" She murmured in a low, soft voice, obviously trying not to disturb more the mood. Kurt turned his head to face her and his gaze was pure bewilderment. "I'm sorry, hi..." she continued. "I don't want to disturb you but do you think maybe uh you could take care of your sub outside?"

Sebastian sank in his seat as best he could, wishing his head would disappear between his shoulders. Great, he couldn't come here anymore.

Kurt reacted at the same time as him, only that instead of trying to disappear he got obfuscated.

"Oh no— he's not my, I mean he and I, we—"

"It's nothing personal, but you're attracting the attention and I wouldn't like to happen anything serious." She smiled a little after stopping Kurt's stammering but he still looked troubled. "Sorry, I just work here."

Sebastian was going to tell her to go, but Kurt spoke earlier.

"It's okay, I understand. Umh I promise you nothing's gonna happen, okay?"

She nodded, apparently as eager to leave as Sebastian. "Okay, thank you."

When the girl had finally gone, Kurt looked at him again, apparently completely forgetting that there was ever someone there and continuing as if nothing had interrupted them. He tried to follow his example.

"Sorry, I keep doing that." Kurt said, calmer now. "But- why you didn't you ask a friend, it would have been the best choice."

"What friends?" Sebastian said, his hands shaking over his legs. "The only thing I have are the Warblers and they are hardly acquaintances."

"What about the clinic? That's another good option."

"They are strangers too," he argued.

"But they are professionals. They do this every day for people who need it, like you."

"But they'll notify Dalton, and in less than 24 hours everyone will know that I'm a sub; they'll take away my place in the Warblers." he said, looking directly at the boy, hoping that the fact that he was using his name would help on something. "It's all I have."

"That is not true. And they wouldn't do that." He discussed, not as sure as he wanted to sound.

"You think so? A sub has never been the leader of the Warblers. The further they came was with Blaine Anderson, but not really, Wes was the leader all that time, he just preferred to be away from the spotlight. Besides I kind of think they were all in love with him, I don't know, it must be in a regulation or something. Subs are not leaders, Kurt."

The dom remained silent, biting his lower lip in his attempt to focus on something. Anything. Anything that could help the guy who only a week ago was flirting shamelessly with his ex.

"I'm going insane," Sebastian confessed. "My grades are plummeting, yesterday we had a test and I'm sure that if it was possible to get less than zero, probably that would be my note. I've been going around and around in my head the last two nights and I already considered all options in this and other universes... And this is my last chance if I don't want to end up with a stroke, or worse."

"What?" Kurt asked, shrugging slightly.

Sebastian sighed.

"That you do it."

Kurt's eyes opened wide, his eyebrows rising almost to the hairline and his mouth opened wordlessly for a second. Sebastian was looking at him expectantly from his side of the table with nervous urgency coursing through his body.

"Your— are you—" Kurt stammered, totally incredulous for the words that were still hanging around his head.

"Do you realize what you're asking me, right?"

"Yes, I do," Sebastian said quickly, then looked away and shook his head, as if trying to remember something himself. "I mean, you did it once, didn't you? You can do it again. "

"Yes, I did because it was an emergency and if I hadn't intervened you would've drugged yourself to nonsense," he said, reluctant. "I'm not a professional like the people at the clinic, I barely have some knowledge about the subs nature from what I remember of my classes more than two years ago."

"You wouldn't do it without anything in return; I can pay you every time you have to help me." the sub offered without listening to anything that Kurt was saying. "A little bird told me you need a job to raise funds for the place you'll live next year in New York."

"Where did you get that?" Kurt questioned. His face growing incredulous at every moment. The only ones who knew about it were his father, Finn and Rachel.

"I have my contacts." Sebastian shrugged, but his dismissive attitude wasn't working today.

"It's not about money," Kurt assured him.

"First of all, you have big problems regarding submission, which I think is something you should talk to someone, besides you don't even bother to listen to what I'm saying, how am I supposed to accomplish something? If you are not willing—"

"Oh no, I am, really, I promise I am willing," he assured at the verge of panic when he saw Kurt starting to stand up from his chair. "I'll try, I'll do everything I can, I'll do whatever you say. I can't lose all I have, I need the Warblers and I need good grades if I want to get into a good college and get out of this dump."

Kurt thought about it. If anyone understood what it was trying to escape at all costs from Ohio was him. Sebastian and he had more in common than it'd seemed at first, and well maybe they barely can put up with each other, but they both knew what it was like to feel like an outcast, what it was not fitting in with the world. But Kurt was lucky enough to have learned to ignore the stares and become immune to the ridicule, while Sebastian had to face not feeling comfortable in his own skin, to risk his health to preserve an illusion, to what Kurt would never agree. Still, it wasn't his place to take that away from him.

"I'm not saying yes," Kurt said as a warning but as usual Sebastian seemed not to understand the meaning because he was already smiling like who gets everything they want. "But even if I accepted, I can't help you in the right way."

"Why?" Sebastian questioned exasperated.

"I don't have enough time. Sebastian, we live about two hours away and I have things to do, classes and assignments, besides Glee Club, rehearsals, and help my dad in the shop on weekends, and believe it or not, I occasionally go out with my friends." he said seeing the face of the sub decompose.

"Well one of those things can be me. Just make a small space from time to time for me, I'm not asking you to be my bodyguard or anything,"

"Subs must be dominated on a regular basis, Sebastian." Kurt said wryly. How could one sub know so little about his own nature? "A sub completely healthy must be dominated from three to more times a week, for a sub on sickness daily would be the ideal."

"I never said I wanted to be 'completely healthy' I just want to think properly." Sebastian folded his arms, this was being more complicated than he initially thought it would be. "Only until the sickness goes away, okay?"

"Even if I do, your sickness will keep coming back again and again for the rest of your life, and give thanks that it's only every couple of years and not more often." Sebastian was going to throw up at the prospect of having to live this again from the beginning.

"Like heat," he joked darkly, he was not an animal, he was a damn human being!

"Or like the period," Kurt offered in exchange, the clear mockery in his voice. Okay, maybe he did deserve that.

"Well played Hummel" he accepted his loss. He could give him that, but he wouldn't give up so easily to his status in Dalton, he wasn't going to lose this fight. Kurt shrugged.

"Thanks, but that's not the point."

"Look, I'll see what I do next time. I'm asking for your help now, will you give it to me?" Sebastian questioned. He knew that Kurt was one step away, only one step from accepting; he saw it his expression, though he couldn't be sure which was the reason behind it. It didn't matter at the time, all he needed at that moment was to get rid of the huge pain in his crotch, at any cost. Even if it meant having to bow before Hummel.

Kurt let out a sigh of surrender, unable to believe what he was about to say.

"Okay," he muttered barely loud enough for Sebastian to hear. The sub looked satisfied as Kurt seemed to want to hang himself after the words came out from his mouth.

"I knew you'd accept," he gloats, even though all he wants just now is to make Kurt take him to a more private place and relieve the latent pain between his legs. He was suddenly much happier than he was before.

"This must remain very clear; the only reason I agreed to this is because, in some way, I feel responsible for you." Kurt warns menacingly, still without being very sure of his earlier words.

"And why is that?" he pries stupidly, it's obviously not with the brain with what he's thinking if he'd left this conversation go beyond what it was necessary, what mattered the reason Hummel had to accept their deal? The important thing is that he gets the release that he's been waiting for, but he has the feeling that it wouldn't sound very elegant to just suggest a quick session in the bathroom of the Lima Bean, not that he'd mind normally, but he has to take care of Hummel's temperament if he wants to have him available for every time this... thing, comes up to bother him again.

"Why? Because I'm the only one who knew what was going on and I should have taken you to a clinic when I understood what you were trying to make and I just, I was so careless, I let it go too far!" Kurt exclaims, both hands covering his face to hide his anger toward himself and Sebastian just wants to tell him to stop being an idiot.

Of course it was not his fault, he had already gone too far before he found out anything, the only fault was of the stupid nature that had been so wrong with him, and Sebastian never, he would never have forgiven him if he'd given his consent to the hospital to take him to a clinic. Sebastian knows that as the only dom in his care at the time, Kurt could have done just that, actually, he's pretty sure that's what most people in his situation would have done...

"But you'd never do anything with what I wasn't comfortable." Sebastian realizes, watching Kurt's pupils widen a bit to his words, and suddenly this doesn't seem like the world's worst idea ever anymore.

"Yeah, well" Kurt shifted in his seat uncomfortably "That doesn't mean it wasn't irresponsible, I assure you I won't make the same mistake again, so, or we find a way to make this— whatever, work or I'll take you to that clinic, without complaining. that's my price."

Sebastian pouts, he hates even the thought of failure.

"Okay, I give you my word" that wouldn't happen anyway, he would make sure of it. "Anyway I want to pay you," he insists.

"I don't accept it." Kurt refused and Sebastian rolled his eyes.

"See it as a job, okay? you lend me a service and I remunerate—"

"It wouldn't be right"

"It's an agreement that benefits us both, I get rid of this nightmare and you cover the expenses of the horrible place in which you'll end up living next year," He stops when he sees how Hummel is taking a more serious expression. He's not sure it's because of the mockery, or for the insistence that he was putting on the subject.

"No, Sebastian." A shiver ran down his spine as Kurt's voice becomes severe and imposing, it makes something within himself wants to become smaller under the accusatory gaze. "I know you have a problem with listening, and is something we'll have to work in the future, but for now I've already given you an answer, and I'm not willing to change my mind."

Sebastian says nothing in return but his silence only translates as a humiliation to his brain. He'll have to get used to it, because if this is Kurt, in a public place in the full view of everyone, he doesn't want to know what will happen when they are finally alone and have to find a more effective way to end his sickness than only ropes and ties.

"Okay. My dad works weekdays and rarely gets home until I'm asleep so it'll have to be one of those days. Give me your home address."

Sebastian is a terrible sub. He has always known it, but that is only confirmed by the tremendous need to discuss everything that comes out of Kurt's mouth, -he is already feeling the gentle relief run through his limbs at the small orders, but his muscles tense when the aftershocks reach his head like raindrops-. He doesn't understand why they have to wait, they are here, they are together and there is nothing that prevents them from doing the dirty work now.

"We can't use my house," he says instead, because he's not willing to admit that he can't wait that long for Kurt to touch him— it's not about that at all, he just wanted to move without his cock getting in the way of his legs. "I mean, my parents aren't in the city and they didn't let me a way in. I stay in Dalton on weekends, so they never leave me a key." He explains, pretending not to see the surprise in Kurt's eyes.

"Nor will it be in my house, my brother stays with me and it'd be impossible for him not notice your presence." Kurt argued, frowning slightly and placing both hands on the center of the table to lean on his arms.

"We can meet at my bedroom in Dalton. The keeper is an acquaintance of mine, he'll let you in for a couple of twenties, and I'll manage with the prefect." Sebastian thinks aloud. It's not as if he'd never had to get someone snuck into his bedroom, that would be the easy part.

He carefully scrutinizes Hummel. He's not very comfortable with Sebastian's recent proposal. His eyes are lost somewhere behind Sebastian's shoulder, and his cheeks are a little pink behind all that pale defect free skin.

"Are you a virgin?" The dom chokes with coffee, which he had only just bring to his lips, coughing a little as his cheeks finished dyed red and he looked at Sebastian with bewilderment. If they were in another situation, any other that didn't involve Sebastian asking Hummel for a favor, he would probably laugh at how ridiculously young that expression made him look.

Seriously, how it is that Hummel had been lucky enough to be a dom but he hadn't? The universe was a bitch.

Kurt cleared his throat, which attracted his attention back to him. "No, as a matter of fact I'm not, but that's none of your business"

Sebastian shrugs innocently. "Okay, it's just good to know that you have dominated someone before. You know I wouldn't like to be in the hands of a beginner." He says, very sure of himself even though he knows that's not true at all. He had just been curious, Hummel looked so... innocent, it was hard to imagine him being the dominant in any relationship, but from personal experience he remembers how severe those eyes could become at the right time, it made him get on his nerves.

"If you don't want my help..."

"No, no. It's fine." Sebastian said quickly. Kurt narrowed his eyes at him, suspicious and sighed deeply.

"Listen Sebastian, I think there's something we haven't made clear." He said, putting both hands together in front of him again, giving an appearance as if they were discussing something much more serious than it was, at least in Sebastian's opinion. "I'm accepting this because I see that you really need it and because I feel like it's my duty to do so... but sex isn't going to be involved at any point."

Sebastian's eyebrows rose in disbelief until the middle of his forehead.

"No sex?" It sounded stupid even from his own mouth, ridiculous even, in what way Kurt expected to help him without sex?

Domination revolved around sex, how did he expect to exert any kind of it then? What would he do? Order him to clean his room until he could see his reflection on the floor? Order him to cook as a subhouse of the 50s?

"I am aware that we'll have to have some intimacy so that there is a significant effect, but of course there will be a limit." He clarified, again using that clinical language that Sebastian didn't like it one bit.

"It's fine, I wouldn't mind, you know. Sex is easy, and it may help me. Not big thing." he glosses it over with a hand gesture. If Hummel wasn't a virgin and he obviously wasn't either, then he doesn't see what the problem is, nothing new for either, yet that doesn't stop Kurt's expression from saddening at his words for some reason.

"I'm sorry you feel that way, for me it is a big deal." he said, his eyes alternating between Sebastian's face and an unknown place in his hands. After a moment like this he seemed to remember something important because he immediately began picking up his bag, throwing it over his shoulder before standing up. "Now, I have to go. I already stayed more than I was supposed to." He explained, also taking his cup of coffee in his hands.

The lower part of Sebastian's body moved in disappointment.

"Umh, wait" he hesitated, which was very uncommon on him but he quickly composed, clearing his throat. "We're here, couldn't we just...? You know... now?"

Hummel wrinkled his nose, making him look like a seven year old boy who had been asked to eat his vegetables. Sebastian's ego prevented him from considering it an insult, because he was so not vegetables, ever.

"No," Kurt said, leaving no room for complaint. "I said I had a compromise. Moreover, it's not as easy as you think." This time he couldn't stop himself from rolling his eyes, what could be so complicated that he couldn't do something for him for about ten minutes so he didn't have to spend another night sleepless?

"I'll call you tomorrow. Maybe then." The dom smiled a little, and when Sebastian said nothing, still upset by another 24 hours of physical torture, —minimum, if Hummel didn't put more excuses tomorrow— he turned and left, giving Sebastian one perfect view of his ass in those pants that left nothing to the imagination.

They'll be some hard 24 hours.

…

Sebastian hadn't been wrong. From the moment he'd left the cafeteria and made his way back to Dalton until the next day as he waited as a condemned man Hummel's arrival every second had been nothing but hell.

He hadn't slept 30 minutes straight throughout the night, he had vomited the whole breakfast as a bulimic teenager and jerked off three times today already. At least Kurt's message that morning ensuring he'd come, helped him to calm a little bit. He had tried to dress correctly so to not show how really affected he was while walking as if nothing through the halls of Dalton, incredibly grateful that there wasn't Warblers rehearsal today, so he wouldn't have to deal with anyone telling him to stop going to nightclubs and instead get some sleep to fade the dark circles under his eyes. They didn't know they were so far from the truth.

He also didn't bother to pretend to pay any attention during his math and English classes, he knew it was pointless anyway, any thought that wasn't related to a dick passed his mind in seconds. He finished his stupid classes just so no one could suspect that something was going on with him. He said goodbye to the few people who spoke to him in his last class, —always with his backpack in front of him, covering what would be a very embarrassing boner if anyone could see it— and retired to his room without making any attempts to eat something again since he knew it would end in a bag or in the toilet by the way.

So now he was alone among these four walls, circling over the small area of space in his room at Dalton like a caged animal, waiting for Hummel to decided to show— if he even was going to...

No. No, Kurt said he'd be here, he will be here.

Sebastian knew he could call him, just ask the exact time when he'd arrive so he could stop torturing himself with doubts, if Kurt wasn't coming he would already send him a message right? But he didn' want to expose himself like that, didn't want to seem like the desperate sub waiting for his dom like a bitch in heat.

But he had too little willpower, without sleep or eat anything and waste it all just walking in his room.

One day the universe was going to pay for this.

To Princess bitch (5:48): Where are u?

It takes too long before Kurt is answering anything and Sebastian startled when he feels his phone vibrating in his hand.

From Princess bitch (5:56): Can't talk. Driving. I'll be there in 15.

Instant relief fills Sebastian's body. At least now he knows there is less than an hour to wait ahead. His dick, which hadn't stopped being hard since three days ago was very happy too.

To Princess bitch (5:58):fine. my room is the A-3

Exactly 12 minutes later, another message enters his inbox, he guesses Kurt had finally finished driving.

From Princess bitch (6:10): Yeah, I remember.

Oh, right. Stupid. Kurt had been here before, twice, that day Sebastian had tricked him about getting help from a friend, and of course Hummel had fallen easily like the innocent twink he was and that other in which he'd tried to tie him to the bed like in one of those bad pornographic films. His brain was being less useful with every minute and at least it's good that Kurt's text sounded amused instead of judgmental.

He doesn't answer the message, deducing that Kurt would arrive soon anyway, he'd paid the guard very well to turn a blind eye to that. As he thought there is a knock at his door less than five minutes later and he cannot help how his body responds to the sound as if it were the gates of paradise despite how much his brain really has.

"It's open" Fortunately, his voice comes out controlled enough to not give himself away, but as soon as the door is moving to let Hummel in a small shiver ran down his back and arms.

Kurt looks at him from the door frame, soft blue eyes inspecting the room and then slowly turn to him before taking a step forward and shut the door behind him. He's wearing one of those tight pants that Sebastian appreciated so much in his body, a white, long-sleeved shirt and a black vest with silver buttons. In short, too many layers. His cheeks are flushed as they are most of the time and his lips are pursed in a hesitant expression. But Sebastian doesn't have time for a staring contest.

"Well, you finally show up!" Sebastian exclaims, raising his voice and pretending not to notice as Kurt's cheeks turn scarlet as his gaze travels down Sebastian's body to meet the boy's raging hard.

He doesn't understand, it's not as if he hadn't seen it before. "I've been waiting here for over two hours, I was about to put the rope around my neck"

Kurt tries to recover the composure. It's not an admirable job, however.

"I had to take my father to the airport. I have other things to do, you know. Remember that I told you," he points out, using the defiant tone that is becoming quite typical of him. Sebastian decides to change the subject since the direction it was taking wasn't convenient.

"Yeah, whatever, it doesn't matter just ... can we, get it all over at once? I even changed the sheets for your little annoying internal bitch so you don't bother me for any residues that it might have so it would be really great if we got in bed already—

"NO! Wait!" Kurt interrupts him startled. Sebastian holds his impulse to joke at his childish attitude when he's had Sebastian's hard dick against him because Kurt looks suddenly alarmed by the situation.

"What?" he asks, feeling more than a little intimidated himself. "You're not having second thoughts now, do you?"

His breath caught in his chest when he sees the doubt in Kurt's eyes, but his expression changes immediately and Sebastian calms a bit.

"No, it's not that," he clarified, and Sebastian knows he's being honest, but that doesn't stop him from hearing the lump in his throat as he speaks. "But... before we start anything, there are many aspects that I think we both need to revise and agree on."

"What do you mean?" he asks, feeling really confused. His body isn't in the best condition now to make riddles, it'd be much easier if Kurt just spoke to him plainly. "I think everything is very clear, you help me, you can forget your fault for something I don't understand and I stop being horny against my will at inappropriate places, and everyone happy." He sums. It was, more or less, what it was all about in the end.

Kurt shakes his head, crossing his arms. "I'm sorry. If I'm going to do this thing, this is something I need to do. It's a way to ensure the interests of both, and I think it would be good for you too."

"Fine" Sebastian accepts, since he has given up so many things to get out of this purgatory one more wouldn't hurt. "What do you want, Hummel?"

He smiles, satisfied, and begins to rummage inside what Sebastian is starting to think like the surprise bag. After the great amount of ropes he'd seen come out of that bag the last time Kurt had been here, he certainly didn't expect that all that comes out from there was a pen and a purple notebook.

He frowns as Kurt opens it and looks for a blank page, dropping the rest of the bag on the floor.

"I want us to write this together," he says, taking a couple of steps to sit on the bed, almost two feet from Sebastian now, completely ignoring the state of his groin. "It's an agreement that will stipulate the duties and limits of each other while this... well, as long as this lasts."

"Like a contract?" he asks ironically, because no matter how little he knew about formalities, he's not as stupid to not know the implications of a bonding contract, his parents are lawyers for God's sake!

"Yes, um... something like that," Kurt hesitates. "I know this is probably new to you, I don't have much experience either; I've only been bonded once and only know the most basic things of what my dom classes taught me." Sebastian doesn't say anything to that, surprised by the new information that Hummel had really be bonded before.

When seconds pass and Sebastian is still wordlessly Kurt continues. "It wouldn't have a legal value of course, since we aren't in a real relationship, but just to have something to backup."

He does not know what would be the point, nevertheless whatever Hummel said is what will be done right? Wasn't it like that in any instance?

"I hardly find that necessary,"

Kurt glared at him.

"Yeah, whatever you say," he says, because he knows it would be ridiculous to discuss now, he just wants to do this as quickly as possible, so he can finally get a decent night's sleep.

The corner of Hummel's mouth rises, but it doesn't become a smile and then his hand is flying through the paper, writing with a small and clumsy letter. Sebastian leans closer to read what it says.

Temporary Domination-Submission Agreement

Kurt writes in the top of the paper, Sebastian frowns at the domination-submission part but he tries to hide it when Kurt looks to check his reaction.

This agreement establishes that the dominant part, Kurt Hummel, undertakes the responsibility to help the submissive part, Sebastian Smythe, through his sickness by the necessary means until it is completely finished and the aforementioned is free of sequels and able to remain healthy by himself. Likewise, the submissive agrees to obey the dominant, as long as this agreement lasts to ensure the effect of it.

"Is it good for you?" Kurt asks, raising an eyebrow at him and this time Sebastian can't hide his scowl.

"Yeah, it's just... it's very formal," he tries to explain, he didn't think this really would be like a contract, in every sense of the word. Maybe it didn't truly matter what his parents were, he was still ignorant about a lot of things of this nature. Especially when most of these... protocols, had begun to exist only a few years ago.

"I'm just trying to make it clear enough without being too long, so it's easier to understand."

Sebastian nods, leaving aside the subject and letting Kurt continue writing.

1. Safewording

"You're all right keeping the same safeword system? Or would you like a more personal one?" Kurt looks genuinely interested in his answer, but the truth is that Sebastian doesn't understand very well the objective of safewords so he just nods in agreement.

The safewording system will be the standard: green, yellow and red. It's expected from the submissive to see for himself and use the safeword with intelligence at the moment he feels threatened physically or psychologically. The safeword may be used at any time during a scene.

"Is that clear?" Kurt interrupted his writing.

"Pretty" Sebastian mutters, sitting on the smooth surface of his bed. "I have a doubt."

"Witch one?" Kurt asks, and not exasperated or angry, on the contrary, he seems perfectly willing to answer any question Sebastian might have.

"This... safeword is...? I can stop you, when I want?"

"When you need to" Kurt corrects.

"It's the same,"

"No, it is not," he leaves the notebook on his lap, giving the sub all his attention. "To want and need is not the same, especially not for a sub. You may want an ice cream at mid-winter, but it doesn't mean you should have it."

Sebastian's brow is beginning to be tired of so much pucker. How was he supposed to know the difference? When he wants something he usually gets it, he doesn't stop to think about whether it's good or not, he just does it.

This is turning out to be more complex than he expected.

2. Honesty

The submissive is committed to being totally and completely honest with the dominant while this agreement remains valid and know that the same can be expected back.

"All right?" he nods in response to Hummel. He is many things, but not a liar.

3. Punishments.

He swallowed. He knew it would come, even if a small part inside him hoped Kurt would forget so he wouldn't have to think about it, but now it was here, practically being displayed before his eyes.

Any punishment that takes place during this period of time will be previously talked and discussed by both parts before made without exception. If the submissive part doesn't agree or thinks he doesn't deserve the punishment that has been imposed he must inform the dominant. If after speaking the disagreement continues a different form of punishment will be sought. In case the punishment surpasses one part's hard limits it can always safeword and the punishment will be forgotten and talk about, at the end of the discussion all will be forgiven.

It didn't sound so bad, he had to admit, but he knows that doms can be very fickle about punishments, he better than anyone was aware of it, and he cannot rely too much on the kind words of a piece of paper, not if he was to be helpless at the mercy of a whip later.

4. Respect and Obedience.

As already mentioned at the beginning of the contract the submissive agrees to obey all that the dominant deems appropriate, as well as the dominant agrees to see for the interests of the submissive all the time while this agreement lasts, all with due respect to the other part and respecting the stipulated limits.

"This rule is more for me than for you, but I still wanted it in writing," Kurt says, but Sebastian is so mesmerized by the paper and his brain is unable to pay attention to more than one thing at a time so he didn't even bother to move his eyes to Kurt.

"What limits?" he questions, intrigued, and he would have laughed if he wasn't so tired when he saw Kurt scribbling a little below:

5. Limits.

"Something you have in mind?" Sebastian's gaze gets lost in the words of the page and knows that Kurt can tell. God this was taking too long. "Okay, I'll start"

Bloodplay.

Sebastian begins to shake a little on the mattress and Kurt is watching him suspiciously when it leaves his mouth without hesitation. "Knifeplay" the dom's eyes narrow but he doesn't protest as he writes the word down and then another.

Knifeplay.

Breath control.

"Anything else on your mind?" Kurt asks, and instantly many images fill Sebastian's head, making his breathing even more difficult than it already was.

"Heat plays, needles, burns, nothing permanent,"

Needle play, games with fire, intentional creation of permanent marks on the skin. Painplay.

He looked at Kurt who only shrugged. "You don't look like a fan," he said and wrote something on the paper.

Public play.

As if it was in discussion. Never, for anything in the world he'd let Hummel do anything to him in public. Despite the enormous sexual frustration this was bringing him, he had to admit he was starting to like it. It would save him a lot of time refusing to do things later and thus Kurt couldn't say that he wasn't clear from the beginning. He saw his chance and took it, even if he knew any word in that agreement could be ignored or evaded from one second to another, seeing it written on a piece of paper soothed him.

"Infantilism, no baby-boy or any of that shit," the corner of Kurt's mouth rose gracefully as he writes. "Humiliation, double penetration, fisting,—"

"Wow, wow, wow stop right there," Kurt interrupted and Sebastian was suddenly scared that Kurt would refuse to any of its limits, which were so many he knew but he just couldn't stand the thought of someone doing something like that to him, but Kurt's eyes were soft and calming with nothing more than a little confusion shining on them.

"You don't agree?" his voice went hoarse and maybe a little inconsistent. Kurt shook his head quickly.

"It's not that, your limits are fine but I think you've forgotten that among us there will be no... uh any kind of, you know."

"Oh" Actually, he didn't think Kurt was serious that day at the Lima Bean.

"Yes, then I don't think those last two will be necessary to stipulate, regarding the humiliation..."

Sebastian was nervous again, that was a weak point. "Just, don't call me a whore, yeah?"

"I wouldn't—" the dom starts but stops abruptly at some thought. Sebastian knows, he's aware that's what most people think when they met him, it's not a secret and no one in the past has made efforts to keep it away from his ears but he just couldn't bear to be called that during a... scene? Was that what Kurt called it?

Humiliation (Slut-Shaming), Kurt writes without further comment.

"Anything else?"

Only one thing is still hanging around Sebastian's mind and after all he's said he doesn't have anything left to lose.

"Whips" he mutters softly and Kurt's hand is flying back to the paper when he stops and turns to look at Sebastian again, both eyebrows raised.

"Really?" he asks, almost in disbelief and seems more intrigued than anything.

"Why?" Sebastian doesn't want to think that Kurt is acting by a wish rather than considering his discomfort, but it's hard when he feels he's being judged by his choice.

"No, nothing, forget it" Kurt half-smiles at him and to his relief his hand is already gripping the pen. "I was going to say most subs this and that, but it's just fine."

He won't take risks. He nods, and Kurt writes it in the last point of the list.

"I'm not most subs" Sebastian snorts, once the relief is filling his body seeing the written word. Kurt's smile doesn't drop even a little at his peevish tone and his hand is still moving.

This agreement will always be available to changes at any time required.

Kurt stares at the paper now completely filled in his lap, inspecting it carefully. Sebastian thinks he has read it at least four times when his eyes finally separate from the notebook.

"Okay, so I think that's all for now." He says as he removes the paper of the notebook and gives it to Sebastian, who looks at it like it's a potential bomb.

"Read it," Kurt instructed him, he isn't sure whether it's or not an order, "make sure there is nothing you want to add, if so you can write it."

It's torture, in every sense of the word. Sebastian has to try to make sense of each pair of lines that his eyes pass and every couple of minutes he loses the reading, having to return and realizing he doesn't know where he left off. It takes too long but he tries to do it right, don't want to miss anything of what the stupid agreement says, especially if he can use it in his favor at some point. He doesn't find anything he wants to add, however.

He gives it back to Kurt, looking just the same as it did before, and says nothing in return. He hopes Hummel is able to tell how little he can handle this situation because he knows he's about to pass out any time.

"Can we start now?" he strives to ask, exhausted. Kurt doesn't make him wait much longer.

"Yes"

Sebastian feels the world stop spinning. Kurt has risen from bed and slowly, very carefully moves a few steps forward to position himself between his knees, looking directly at his face from above. Sebastian can't focus well the image but he knows his eyes are wide as Kurt examines him and then there's a cold hand touching his face, he hadn't noticed he was sweating until now.

"Look at me," Sebastian looks up to find Kurt's big blue eyes. They aren't cold as the first time he'd helped him out, but neither were they the insecure and shy eyes of the Kurt he had met in the parking lot outside Dalton; It was a strange mixture of humanity and determination, and Sebastian's body couldn't help but react to the sight.

"Listen to what I'm about to say, I'll only say it once, so pay attention," Kurt said, applying a firm grip on his face, but it didn't hurt, it only felt solid. "You're going to go to the bathroom and take a shower, as long or as short as you want it doesn't matter, but clean yourself as good as you can, then dry yourself from head to toe and get back here, am I being clear enough?"

He nodded in the haze of his head and stumbling a bit he stood up from his place on the mattress and started walking toward the bathroom. Once inside he got into the shower, not even taking the time to take his clothes off before opening the tap, letting the water soak his body.

It was cold, it was the first thing he noticed when some clarity came to his mind at the contact with the water. He heard a quiet chuckle from the room and found Hummel looking at him through the open door. He couldn't have felt more stupid there, standing under the running cold water fully clothed. But Hummel seemed to have a little mercy, because he came in and closed the bathroom door to give him some privacy. Sebastian let out all the air in his lungs.

He got rid of his shirt and shoes, throwing them out of the shower and let them soak the floor, then also the pants and underwear were gone but for some reason Sebastian continued feeling stupid. Perhaps it was mostly because Kurt had seen him, he had seen how lost and incoherent he was, and it was so humiliating.

It's hardly surprising that he also takes a long time to clean himself properly, despite the cold water it helped his head to remain lucid at a certain level. There's not much difference, really. His muscles were reluctant to relax, even after his body had gotten used to the temperature. His right leg is trembling and he has to concentrate to stop it before the rest of his limbs follows the example. Every nerve, every pore, every drop of blood in his system is pulling him out, begging him to leave his fears behind and succumb to the desires of his body.

Because if he was going to start being honest, he had to admit; it scares him. It frightens him what might happen out there, once he steps out, and Kurt is there, all his famous dom hormones emanating from him and with the permission to do anything, whatever he wanted with him, and he's not a man easily frightened but this particularly terrifies him.

He recognizes he has some security right? Hummel's not a bad guy, he knows that at some level, and he couldn't do anything that'd been written in that agreement, it was a deal, if so, he didn't have much to worry about, right? A part of him, however, couldn't be completely sure of anything.

But it really doesn't matter what he believes or thinks in the end, what will happen will happen, whether he like's it or not, and at this point, with his body burning under the cold water and his heart beating a mile a minute just at the thought of what might happen, Sebastian wants it, subconscious, almost against his will but he can't deny that's all he wants for the time he takes the courage to close the tap of the shower and wraps a towel around his hips.

He takes a second to look at himself in the small bathroom mirror of his room in Dalton. The man who returns his gaze is pale, tired, confused, but mostly sick.

His hands, trembling and thinner than he remembers them dry him the best they can; from his short, thick hair without need of much attention, to his legs dripping water on the white tile floor.

He faltered on the bed clothes he rarely uses when he's alone, unsure about whether he should dress or just go out like this. Kurt never said anything about putting clothes, but he can't imagine Hummel, Hummel innocent little baby cat, wanting him to come out completely naked neither.

At the end he decides to put on only his underwear, likewise he supposes that anything else would go away too soon to worthwhile put it over, but coming out completely naked could well scare Hummel's interior prude.

He gives a last look at his reflection in the mirror.

He sighs. There was no turning back.

His hand spins the doorknob and it opens by itself, revealing an empty room.

...

Sebastian was tense again when he realized Kur's absence.

His room is as he left it, the rumpled blankets in a corner on his bed, some of his books under the desk, part of his clothes lying on the office chair, the paper Kurt had written a few minutes ago resting on his nightstand. But nothing... no sign of Kurt.

What had changed? Could it be that he'd got tired of waiting? He'd heard doms are terrible at waiting, that it makes them grumpy and even bitter, yet he found it hard to believe that just waiting for a shower would have made him give up... he had told him to take his time, he was sure, then... it was him? Perhaps Kurt had thought it better and regretted it all, decided he wasn't worth it, that Sebastian was nothing more than a lost cause and that everything would be just a failure...

Sebastian felt like a castaway on the ocean in this small room, feeling as if the air was missing, as if what he needed was so close to his reach but he was too weak to get it, as if he were to drown any time and there was no escape, no place to go.

He was so busy going crazy about his breath stuck in his chest and his head spinning that he almost didn't notice when there was a crack in the door. Kurt slipped through the entrance, both hands full carrying a tray of food with what appeared to be fruit, cereal, and juice. He took a moment before noticing Sebastian's presence but when he did, when blue eyes found his Sebastian held on that look as if it was the only thing that kept him alive.

The dom's eyes never moved below his neck and Sebastian wonders in the silence of his mind whether it is on purpose, to not offend him, or if it's so little his interest in Sebastian's body that he didn't have to make any effort. He doesn't know why this make him so upset but when Kurt left the tray on the desk next to the door and suddenly is one step away from his own body all his problems disappear. His expression is consistent and inflexible, he looked as if he wanted to comment on something, rebuke him for some reason, but he doesn't, and won't from the soft glow that fills his eyes, the one he is being hypnotized by without his consent.

"Kneel,"

His knees touched the floor before he even finished to understand the phrase, restoring his fast and heavy breathing. He doesn't try to discuss even if the small part still conscious of his brain winces at the words, because Sebastian Smythe would never kneel to anyone. Or at least the old Sebastian, the one that wasn't being attacked by countless damned chemicals wreaking havoc in his body would never accept it. But this was only Sebastian, the needy sub who was lost in the need to get his body stop hurting.

It was outrageous, for his body to betray him that way. Kurt smiled as the child who has his whim fulfilled.

"Good boy" He shudders at the name.

His eyes fall down, knowing of the sharp eye on him. Kurt short boots wandering around him, the sound of his slow steps being the only sound in the room except for the pounding of his heart against his chest, he really hopes he's the only one who can hear that. Sebastian felt like he was being examined somehow, judged.

Suddenly he was all too aware of his nakedness. Or half nakedness. He shivers again.

"Is something wrong?" Kurt questioned, still walking with that evaluative step. Sebastian felt his already hard cock squeezing against the soft fabric of his boxers.

"Yo-u w-weren't-" He hates how his voice doesn't seem his at all. Words hurt in his throat and he doesn't know if it's for fear of what might happen or because his sickness barely lets him control his body anymore.

"I went to get some food," Kurt says casually, as if they weren't in the situation they are, as if they were gathered for nothing more than some homework, rather than what it really was. As if Sebastian wasn't half naked and hard in front of him. God, he hated being ignored like this. He had a great body, amazing if he had to say it himself, even if it was slightly damaged by his feeding last week and he didn't like the way Kurt just... unnoticed him, as if he wasn't big deal.

"Are you going to eat while you do this?" He tried to sound mocking but his voice came out too serious, even timid. When the sound of laughter reached his ears he could feel the heat start crawling up his neck.

"Is for you" Kurt clarified, and Sebastian saw his boots positioning again before his eyes. "You don't look very well, it's like you haven't eaten in days."

And that was it, the confirmation of how horrible he must be in the dom's eyes that made him lose the last gram of self-esteem he had left in his body.

"I'll vomit," he told Kurt, it didn't make sense to forced him to eat all that if it'd just end up on the floor.

"No, you won't." Kurt's hand grabbed his chin forcing him to look straight into his eyes, big, blue and still kind enough to stop him from freak out. "Your position is wrong," Kurt held his head high, even when Sebastian tried to pull away, he kept him there. "You must be high and proud, not ashamed. Your knees together, firm, your back straight, hands on your thighs, your head up,"

Sebastian opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out of there. Kurt helped him settle in the "correct" position. His back and knees complained about the effort that the position demanded, but the contemplative look on Kurt's face was worth it; it made him feel seen, attractive and sexy again. Appreciated.

"You have a gorgeous body" Kurt murmured, so, so close ... he wanted to be touched, wanted to touch so bad... "You are beautiful, inside and out. Never let anyone make you feel another way, not even yourself. Subs lesson, 3 and 4, I think. Basics."

Sebastian felt a little twinge of disappointment fell on his chest. He didn't know the words and knew the expression on his face gave him away. Kurt sighed and moved Sebastian's hands forward and then backward. Sebastian sighs, unsure if he should touch or not, and he wanted to do it so much, so much...

"In this position you won't hurt yourself," Kurt said instead. "You'll wait for me like this from now on, in this same place, you can use your clothes if you want to, though, do you understand me? Every time I come here."

Sebastian nodded despite himself. "Yes"

"Yes, what?"

His stomach tightened restlessly and he felt bile climb his throat.

"Yes... Sir"

Kurt smiled subtly. "Good" then his gaze traveled down and Sebastian knew he was looking at his cock, hard and eager for attention. He swallowed, which brought Kurt's gaze back to him.

"I'm sorry I made you wait so long. I know this must be painful for you," So, so much "and I doubt the ropes would do something for you right now, so we'll have to do... something else."

A mixture of fear and pleasure filled completely Sebastian's body. He couldn't say which was stronger than the other, but he didn't exactly care that much right now.

"Sit" Kurt's voice came from above, much closer than Sebastian expected him to be. Sebastian licked his lips, trying to understand. He pulled his legs in front of him, leaving his butt crash on the cold floor and he licked his lips again while waiting.

He saw Kurt walk to stand behind him and heard objects moving on the floor. He wanted to turn around and look at what Kurt was doing but he was afraid that if he did something wrong Kurt would change his mind and let him suffer through the pain alone.

"Okay, I promise I won't see anything alright? You can lean back if you want." Sebastian hesitated, but eventually complied, waiting for his head to collide with something flat and hard.

That didn't happen.

Inadvertently, his head was now resting right on Kurt's back like the other guy sat behind him. He couldn't stop himself from turning his head to take a look. Kurt was legs crossed, staring out the window of the room and although his gaze slid away a little when he realized Sebastian quick look he returned his eyes to its place.

He moved, slightly displeased with the unusual position but forced himself to relax, letting his head drop a little on Kurt's shoulder and into the fabric of his shirt. he smelled quite good so he let the perfume cover him all over in a way he had to stop himself from sniffing the collar of the shirt. Fucking hormones.

"Are you comfortable?"

Sebastian cleared his throat. "Y-Yes?" he could almost see Hummel rolling his eyes behind. The Sir wasn't a thing for him, like whips, or kneeling, or any of this crap that was so, so hot at the moment.

"This is how it'll work, you take yourself on your hand, and you don't come without telling me" Sebastian choked with his own saliva. He didn't think...

"It won't work," he said and heard Kurt make a tired sound. "I've jerked myself off fifth times a day since Friday and it's not helping at all, I-"

"It'll help now," Kurt insisted. "Do you want to do this or do you want to do what I planned last time?"

Sebastian frowned, in the situation he was now whatever Kurt had wanted to do with those ropes wouldn't serve him for three hours. And who was he fooling, he wanted to come.

"Fine" he put his hand into his boxers and proceeded to pull out, sliding the fabric a little down his legs, for more easiness. He took himself in hand carefully, tensing in the way his cock ached at the touch, and when he began to move Kurt's fingers touched the side of his neck, moving slowly to his nape, creating delicate patterns on his hair that had nothing to do with what they were doing.

"Slow, Sebastian" Kurt commanded and when Sebastian didn't obey, too focused on the pleasure of his hand, Kurt tightened his grip on his hair in a way that made Sebastian let out a little cry. "You want to do this or not?" Kurt was rigid against him and made Sebastian realize how irritated he was. For some reason he thought that as Kurt wasn't able to see what he was doing with his hand in this position he would have no way of knowing his exact movements, but he was obviously wrong; Kurt was perfectly able to feel his arm move behind him, from the movements of his back, he guessed. And he wasn't happy about it. "I remind you it was you who asked me to do this, if we do, we'll do it well, and since I don't think you're in the mood for your first punishment I recommend you to behave, do you understand?"

"Y-Yes"

"Yes, what?"

"Yes, Sir." Sebastian said, the words being forced from his mouth. Kurt was right, he wasn't ready for a punishment and try to evade any order he give him wouldn't be on his behalf. And wouldn't encourage Kurt to stay.

"Okay, so... slow." He lets Sebastian take himself in hand again and begins to move as slowly as he can, it feels good, God, it feels so good, he can't help moving faster, just a little. "I said slow." Kurt doesn't shout, doesn't even say it in a very loud voice, but Sebastian feels the demanding tone go straight to his cock. His hands are going slowly again and hips protest, rising to meet his hand, a warm hold stops them to do so once more and Kurt's fingers curl in his hair again.

"Good boy" Sebastian whines, and his hips do that again, his cock spasming in his hand.

"Don't- call me that" he pants. Kurt's fingers curl again, this time in his shoulder.

"You sure?" He says, quiet, not really seem to care how restless his hips had gotten in the last seconds. "You seem to like it,"

Another moan escaped Sebastian's mouth, a mixed sound between embarrassment and pleasure. Fucking hips.

"You go slower" Kurt instructed him, pressing his thumb in the hollow of his neck, making him contain another desperate whimper. "Yes, like that, good. Now you go fast. Faster. Yeah, that's okay."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. It felt too good, too, too good, definitely much better than anything he had done to himself this week, hell much better than any other hand had ever felt and this was only his.

Damn. He wondered how it'd feel when Kurt touched him, when the soft hand stroking his hair was on him, moving to his will, having him completely at his mercy, making him feel so good it hurt.

His hips moved in sync with his hand and his face puckered in agony trying to keep his hips tied to the ground.

"Don't try to control anything," Kurt's voice, a voice he had never heard, whispered in his ear, hoarse and imposing. "I'll take care of that for you, it's my job. You just have to do what I tell you, and enjoy."

He was so fucking turned on, fuck.

"I'm- I—"

"Shh," Kurt whispered in his ear conch. "Slow"

It wasn't a great effort this time, Sebastian's hand obeyed without much protest and he was waiting for the "good boy" to come again. That didn't happen, however. He slowed more his hand, so he was barely moving anymore, but nothing.

"Am I doing something wrong?"

"No, why?"

"You didn't call me—" he stopped when he realized his mistake.

"I thought you didn't like it when I did"

Sebastian swallowed. "I don't, I just..."

"I think your body doesn't think so," he hated the damn superior tone with which he said it, he knew he was right, his body was enjoying this more than he thought he would, but that was no reason to embarrass him. "Faster"

Without expecting anything this time, he let his hand do the job. He could feel the orgasm building on his belly so fast that he hardly had time to notice.

"I'm— close, god I'm so close,"

"Slow" Sebastian let himself rest against Kurt's back, feeling the dom stretching to give him more space to lean. "What do you say?"

"Thank you, Sir" he let out without thinking too much about it and Kurt smiled as having won the battle.

"Faster" Sebastian left his face hide in Kurt's neck, trying not to make very evident how he was inhaling Kurt's smell like an addict. So fucking good.

One of Kurt's hands, the one that until a moment ago was still wreaking havoc in his hair disappears without warning, leaving only the ghost of his fingers and making Sebastian moan again for the loss. He'll regret so much what he's about to say. Later.

"I'm so, so close... I can't— I, please, please,"

"Shh, It's okay, It's okay. You've been okay. Faster. Just a little more and then you can let go." Kurt says to his temple making Sebastian writhed in silence, gasping as his hand gives the last blows, fast and urgent and when Kurt gives his approval his orgasm hits on his stomach.

He is ready for the usual sense of emptiness that follows the orgasm, and is surprised to discover that this never comes. His cock falls limp against his thigh and a heaviness settle on his eyelids as Kurt let him rest his head against his shoulder. His breathing is constant for the first time in days and his chest doesn't hurt with the effort. Kurt doesn't move either after he came and Sebastian knows he still has to finish this, but suddenly it's so difficult only the prospect of getting up from his place and as Kurt doesn't force him to do so he lets himself seize this moment, letting his eyes have the rest they hadn't had in weeks.

…

His eyes flickered open in the blur of his room, the only light in the place being the lamp on the nightstand. He tried to move to adjust in his bed when there was a groan he didn't recognize as his and a soft chuckle on his forehead.

"You woke up. Good, my arm was starting to hurt,"

Everything came to his mind like a whirlwind of memories. The contract, the shower, the discussion, his incredibly satisfying orgasm. Kurt's body was now completely turned so Sebastian was lying on his chest, warm and soft, rather than against his back, his throat hurt a little when he swallowed and he had dry come in his stomach but his body couldn't feel better if he tried.

He leaned on his hand to sit up, instead of keeping crushing Kurt's body with his own. He let out a whimper as he stretched his limbs, he suspected he'd been sleeping for a while.

"Sorry," he apologized, that was so unusual in him.

"It's okay, it's only been a few minutes," Kurt assured him, shaking and stretching a bit too to stand up. "I thought you'd want to rest."

Sebastian feels the need to thank him, he knew that must have been a very uncomfortable position for Kurt, and he still hadn't made him move when he was falling asleep. Sebastian didn't understand why he'd done that, but it made him feel kind of warm inside.

"Go to bed, I'll be right back." Sebastian didn't think much to do just that and get on the mattress, indeed the exhaustion was killing him, so much that he was already falling asleep again when he saw Kurt come back from the bathroom with a pair of cloths and approaching him without warning to press the hot and wet material against his stomach.

Sebastian tenses when Kurt cleans the come off his stomach. It's not something he lets someone else do for him normally, but Kurt is doing it so delicately, almost as if he was afraid of hurting him with the slightly rough cloth, and he relaxes when he realizes that there's no disgust or revulsion in his eyes, only that kindness and grace that he's getting used to being so typical in the dom.

He thinks it's strange how comfortable they both are with his nudity, though he's still keeping his underwear Kurt remains fully clothed, and it's not uncomfortable at all, at least not for him. Sebastian always felt better naked than dressed, he has never known why, always gave credit to his undoubted promiscuity, and Kurt is so normal about it, he don't know if it's a dom thing or a Kurt thing ... but he kinda likes it.

Kurt smiles when he catches him staring between him and his hands, finishing cleaning him up with the cloth.

He opens his mouth, absurdly looking for a way to thank him, in his own way of course, perhaps hidden behind a pair of scathing comments, but Kurt is already turning around again to pick up the tray of food he'd left on his desk, simultaneously throwing the dirty cloth in a pile of stacked towels. Kurt installed the food on his lap, he looked serious but he could also say he wasn't as severe as before.

"Eat something," he says, pointing to the tray. He doesn't have to tell him twice before Sebastian is attacking the plate of fruit, dropping the yogurt on top of it. His stomach rumbling approvingly as he devoured the food in a way that must be very unappealing. He can't find himself worrying.

"Slow" Sebastian shudders and he can't help his cock from hardening a little. He should be embarrassed that Kurt can see his reaction so easily. He's not . Yet the older boy gives him an apologetic look. "I mean, It's not good for you to eat that fast, you don't want to risk throwing up again."

"I'm hungry," he replied, wincing. Besides, his stomach seemed to accept the food happily, unlike before, he doesn't think he'd throw up anything. Suddenly something comes to his mind. "How did you know how to find the cafeteria anyway?"

"Oh, well, I came here for a while." Kurt looks surprised and puzzled by the question but he doesn't seem reluctant to talk about it.

So Sebastian questions, "Really?"

"Umh, yes. I stayed for a while but eventually decided to return to McKinley."

He shuddered again, this time the reflex had nothing to do with arousal.

"Iuk, public school, I'd rather pass for an extra month of unassisted sickness than had that looser smell on my face all the time." he says and Kurt throws his eyes to the ceiling as if to say ''and you're back'' but he knows he's kidding. He wouldn't even be alive after another month on unassisted sickness. He looks at the fruit in the tray, next to the cereal and juice. "You should have brought a hamburger, this crap won't end with half my appetite."

Kurt shakes his head. "You have to eat light. It's your first decent meal in days I'm sure, anything heavier would make you stomach sick."

For fuck's shake, sick, sickness, he just wanted a burger was that so much to ask for?

After a while, when Sebastian has gobbled almost all the fruit and part of the juice Kurt's hand reaches his arm, which is immediately removed when Sebastian realizes it but the dom is still looking at him. "How do you feel?"

On stupidity impulse , Sebastian decides to answer truthfully. "Better"

"I'm glad," Kurt smiles. Sebastian didn't know what to think. Something felt out of place but he can't place what it is, not until his head falls a little and he sees a small, almost nonexistent stain of his come on Kurt's tight jeans.

God, he has been so ungrateful. And that was something that doesn't go well with him.

If there's anything he's proud of is that he was very good to give back what others did for him, and he owed it to Kurt.

The older boy makes a gesture of bewilderment when Sebastian gets off the bed, leaving the rest of his food forgotten, and when he fell on his knees between Kurt's legs where he sits on the edge of the bed and began working on his belt the dom stops him, alarm evident on his face, hands moving Sebastian's fingers away from his belt as much as possible, with the boy scurrying and trying again and again.

"What are you doing?" Kurt asks boggling.

"It's your turn," he said the obvious, he didn't understand why Hummel seemed so shocked with his answer.

"Oh Gosh no, no thank you," Kurt was blushing from his neck to his cheeks, which gave him an appearance a little too innocent for the guy who was telling how to jerk off twenty minutes ago.

"But you did something for me, I think fair I do something for you too," he bit his lip seductively, leaving his tongue out and in playfully, his fingers searching for the buckle of Kurt's belt again. He didn't like being rejected, no matter by whom.

He could feel Kurt getting half-hard underneath his pants.

"This was about you," Kurt reminded him, moving away his hands completely, Sebastian looking defeated. "I don't- need, anything, in fact It's late, I have to go home." He gets up from the bed, leaving an annoyed Sebastian on his knees, didn't Kurt want him? He was just trying to be thankful for what he was doing for him, why didn't he let him?

It was really because he didn't need it, or because he didn't like Sebastian enough?

"I'm leaving now. Sleep, recover your forces, eat something later, do your homework and call me tomorrow, I want to know how you feel... and clean your room, it reeks of cigarette."

And it was all. Kurt was out as if Sebastian was some kind of creep who was stalking him. Well, he certainly was not. Hummel wanted to play hard to get, well, he could play hard too.