Title: without you
Summary: It's taken him years to realize the truth: he's in love with his best friend.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Prompt: childhood best friends au
Rating: K+
A/N: I got so attached to this AU. Definitely going to explore the aftermath in another drabble.

It had taken him their first full summer apart from each other to realize his feelings for Sakura were not quite as platonic as he had always thought them to be.

Ever since their mothers had befriended when they were only eight years old, the two of them had practically spent every day of their lives together; at first awkwardly trying to bide their time, before steadily developing a more familiar relationship—to then becoming the closest of friends.

They had been through nothing short of everything together since then: from endlessly petty years of highschool and too embarrassing family dinners, to disastrous first dates and even more disastrous first kisses; from scuffles and tussles with self-righteous jerks and snobby bimbos, to their sleep-depriving years of undergrad studies and sometimes downright barbarous partying.

Together, they had laughed and cried, and joked and fought, a constant presence in each other's life, never spending more than a few days apart—and for the last sixteen years, that was all Sasuke ever knew. He had never had time to doubt, or ponder about the type of feelings he held for her.

(because to him, she was always just Sakura, his childhood best friend, his closest confidante, the girl he'd seen through in basically every state (just as she had with him); she was his rock, his greatest motivator, the one who always believed in him even when he couldn't.)

Until now.

Eyes set on her thoughtfully, Sasuke watched his somehow now even prettier best friend talk, taking in the glow of her smile and the cute dimples to her cheeks, feeling his heart swell with warmth (in that way that it hadn't seemed to be able to in the three months she was away). He swallowed as imperceptibly as he could. How had he not realized this before?

"You okay, Sasuke-kun?" he heard her ask, then, drawing him away from his thoughts.

Sasuke blinked quickly. Had he been staring too much? He fought the urge to clear his throat, turning his attention back to the restaurant menu in his hands. "I'm… fine."

"Are you sure?" she said, voice laced with concern. It had him looking up again, finding her brows furrowed lightly. "You seem a little distracted."

Yes, by you, his mind mumbled. He went back to the menu once more. "I'm sure," he replied.

"Well… all right, if you say so," she said, though the apprehension in tone did not fade. "You've just… You've been acting a little weird today."

It was just like her to notice, he thought, sighing quietly.

To erase any suspicion, Sasuke forced a faint smirk to his lips. "Why?" he inquired. "Because I'm not saying anything? I'm sorry, I thought you would have been more than happy to have me wordlessly listening to you rambling for hours." He paused here, his smirk growing wider. "Or were you not the one who's always liked talking best all these years?"

Gasping, Sakura reached across the table to smack her hand against his arm. "Sasuke-kun! You're so mean." She stuck her tongue out at him, before giving him a smile, fingers reaching for her glass of wine. She sipped it gracefully. "Admit it, you actually missed having to suffer through all my babbling this summer."

That he did, he acquiesced, mind briefly fluttering to the memory of his summer days: stagnant, all-too silent, and oddly empty. Within the first week already, Sakura's presence was something he quickly found himself yearning for again—but it was different to miss her than it was to miss anyone else he cared for, he came to find out.

There was an ache to his longing this time, a craving for a warmth he'd never realized he'd lost before then, making him feel so lonely, so bland, so… incomplete. Something he never felt when Itachi, his own brother, left for grad school and became too busy to visit him more than once a year; or when Naruto, his other best friend, moved away to another state to live with his girlfriend and pursue his career in law.

(and it was then that he knew that things we not as he thought they were, that she meant something else to him in a way no one else did—because missing your best friend wasn't supposed to make you feel like this.)

He was in love with her, he'd realized by the end of the summer. He was in love with Sakura.

"Tch, yeah, whatever," Sasuke replied, rolling his eyes and seizing his own glass of red. He tried not to think too much about what they probably looked like. "I think you're the one who missed having someone to torture with your stories."

"Awe, am I holding you here against your will, Sasuke-kun?" she cooed, her smile turning quite teasing.

He slowly smirked again. "Haven't you notice I've been trying to get out of this friendship for the past sixteen years?"

A burst of laughter slipped from her mouth at that, the sound bubbling pride in his chest.

"You're such a jerk! You really are," she said, grinning. Her eyes twinkled prettily. "But I missed you, too."

His own eyes softened. "…Hm."

"You know, actually—I take it back," she declared hours later, soon after they'd taken their leave from the restaurant and started heading towards the city docks for a walk instead. "The thing about you being a jerk, I mean. You've been especially nice to me today."

Swallowing lightly, Sasuke found himself fidgeting with the material inside his pants pockets. "Have I?" he asked, trying his best to sound as cool and unperturbed as he hoped he could be.

(heavens, she was too observant today.)

"Well, yeah," she said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. She paused to sidestep a few strangers, trying to keep herself by his side as they weaved through massive crowds. The streets really were busy today. "You paid for my share of everything tonight, you got me these concert tickets for that band that you hate that I've been raving about seeing for like, years now, and you just gave me your jacket because I didn't have the sense to bring something war—Oh! I'm so sorry, sir!"

Sasuke's steps paused at the sound of her soft apology and he turned , frowning as he noticed her bowing quickly to a disgruntled man she had evidently bumped into by mistake. His frown deepened when the stranger simply grunted and continued on, leaving Sakura seemingly a little affronted.

"Well that was rude," she said, when he'd made his way to her again.

"Don't mind him, he looks American," he muttered, before taking her hand in his, guiding her through the horde of bodies surrounding them once again. "You know most of them have no manners."

The move had stunned her—he could tell by her lack of response, and listlessness of her hand in his. It didn't surprise him; while he'd sometimes reached out to guide her through crowds before, he had never before taken her hand in his like this, usually opting to grab her wrist or arm instead.

Maybe she was even blushing, he mused to himself, finding his own cheeks warming at the thought. He kept his eyes steadily ahead of them for that, refusing to look at her before he was sure it had faded.

After a moment, though, she finally squeezed his hand back, letting him lead her through a path. Only when he was sure they were free of the mass did he drop her hand and shove his own into his pockets again, shifting to her with a slight jerk of his head.

"Alright, come on, let's get to the docks already."

She smiled brightly at him, green, green eyes so lovely under these streetlights. "Thanks, Sasuke-kun."

He never wanted her to look at anyone else the way she was looking at him right now, he realized.

Sasuke turned away before he found himself blushing again.

"Flowers for the lovely couple?" a merchant—the third one in the past half hour, Sasuke couldn't help but to note—asked, thrusting a bouquet of pretty roses their way, both of his brows raised with enticement. "Every man should buy his girlfriend roses on a perfect night like this."

"No thank you," Sakura responded, nodding politely at the man and offering a smile. "We're just friends, actually."

"Ah, really? My mistake, then." But the merchant didn't seem convinced at all.

Sakura shook her head. "Have you noticed this has been happening a lot today?" she asked him a moment later, when she was sure they were out of earshot. "I mean, I'm used to everyone thinking that we're been dating at this point—since of course these days a guy and a girl can't be just friends in their minds—but tonight, people seem especially confident in their assumptions about us."

Maybe because I'm crazy about you and everyone and their mothers can see it—except you, Sasuke wanted to say, but deferred. "I guess three months apart gives them something more to see," he said instead, shoulders rolling faintly into a shrug.

"Yeah, they're probably just misinterpreting everything, as usual."

Or were they really ever wrong at all? Sasuke thought, snorting quietly in his mind. The irony of the situation was truly laughable.

"Besides," she said, giggling, "it can't help that I'm wearing your jacket."

"Hn."

Sakura merely smiled at him. "This was a really nice night, though, Sasuke-kun—I really want to thank you for that. I've missed hanging out with you like this. Summer wasn't the same without you."

Sasuke's eyes softened. "I know." Don't ever leave again, he thought.

(gods, he really loved this girl—he didn't know how he'd never noticed it before.)

"Hey, hey! You two lovebirds! Want to buy jewelry to make this night even better? I've got all sorts here, bracelets, necklaces and rings—even some of those matching couples t-shirts everyone seems to have these days!"

"No thank you, we're fine," Sakura answered, once more nodding in acknowledgment.

"Awe, come on, lady. How about watches? I've got just the one your boyfriend might like!"

She momentarily glanced Sasuke's way with mild exasperation and amusement, before replying, "He's not my boyfriend."

They heard the vendor sigh heavily, before he started muttering to himself, his words quickly fading to incoherence as they walked past hearing range.

Sakura couldn't help but to giggle. "You see?" she exclaimed, poking him harshly in the chest. "Another one! I bet if everyone learned how long we've actually been friends, they'd stop thinking we were dating—I mean if something was supposed to happen between the two of us, it would have happened by now."

His steps came to a sudden halt at that, mind whirling for a split moment. Had Sakura thought about the two of them—

"Not that I'm saying I wanted it to!" she immediately scrambled to rectify, then, eyes set on him quite nervously; Sakura must have seen something in his expression that spooked her. "Gods, of course not—us dating? Totally weird!" She laughed here, forced and completely agitated. "That would just—it would be so awkward, you know?"

The words hit him harder than he thought they could, sending his brows furrowing deeply and his hands curling into soft fists; before he knew it, Sasuke found himself blurting out, "Would it really be that wrong?"

(oh.

oh, shit.)

Sakura's mouth slackened visibly at that, her pretty green eyes widening. His heart skipped a beat; he'd taken her completely off-guard.

Sasuke swallowed tightly. Well, his mind mumbled, fighting against the blush trying to rise over his face. He couldn't just bury the hatchet now—Sakura would never let him get away with something like this until everything was out in the open.

So, he kept his stand, and carried through. "You and I, if we were to…" He trailed out, took a pause. He couldn't even say the word. Mulling his lips, Sasuke tried again, "Do you really think it would be that ridiculous?"

A fierce flush took over her entire face, then. The sight had him swallowing tightly once more, chest pounding.

Until finally, Sakura whispered, a bit breathlessly, "Sasuke-kun… what are you saying?"

I'm saying that I love you, and I want to be with you, if you'd let me, he thought, letting out a deep, impatient breath. But he never said it.

Instead, Sasuke did the only thing he could think of: he stepped forward, cupped the back of her head in one hand, and leaned in to kiss her.

Her mouth was so warm and soft against his—that was the first thing he thought about, when his lips had met hers. It felt nice against his own, a little electrifying even, urging his fingers to twine around her locks and his eyes to clench shut tighter, allowing him to savor in the feeling a little longer. She tasted like melon and red wine, like the syrup coated dumplings she'd had for dessert—and on any other day the taste would have had him pulling away; but in this moment, it tasted all so very Sakura, and he couldn't care.

He needed this, if only just for once. Because if Sakura ended up rejecting him, if he could never have this again, he needed to know how it felt to kiss her, really kiss her, and—

Smooth lips moved, started shyly responding to his own, and Sasuke stiffened, mind blanking. Her small hands grabbed the firmness of his hips to hold him, and she kissed him deeper, sighing contently against his mouth. Intense waves of flutters washed over him, prompting him to start moving his lips again, kissing her more languidly, passionately. He wrapped his free arm around her to pull her devotedly close, angling his head in a more comfortable position.

It was a long moment before they finally pulled away.

Keeping her near, Sasuke stared at his pretty little best friend, slightly out of breath but eyes so terribly, terribly fond. He almost wanted to smile as her blush darkened against his tender gaze.

"How long have you been feeling this way?" she mumbled, as he pressed his forehead to her own.

"I don't know," he murmured honestly. "I just know I saw things clearer when you left. Realized what I felt for you was different than I thought… and that it's been different for a while now."

That made her blush even harder. "I wish I would have known that a long time ago…" she mumbled after a moment, a small pout forming to her mouth.

His eyes widened at that. "Wait—You… you liked me?"

Making a noise that sounded an awful lot like a whine, Sakura buried her face in his neck, and tightened her arms around him. "Of course I did! You're Sasuke-kun… You're amazing."

"Why didn't you ever say?"

"Because I didn't want to ruin our friendship, dummy!"

How long had she waited for this, he wondered, eyes softening. Could he have made this all happen years ago?

Exhaling a slow breath, Sasuke pulled her closer. "I'm sorry it took so long…" he murmured.

"It's okay," she replied softly, squeezing him back. Then, she pulled away to look at him, the most bashful smile to her lips. "Kiss me again?"

He was only too happy to oblige.