2 months later
Black canvas.
All around him.
In dreams. In thoughts.
He felt like a caged lion.
His face was bleeding. But his heart more so.
Without meaning to.. he carried them around with him.
The people he had killed.
Snoke had always hated that about him. His inability to not feel remorse.
His inability to not feel.
He felt so much. He felt too much.
He'd spent days, months, years trying not to feel so much...but it was always there. The passion within him, burning like a fire.
A terrifying, hungry fire. A force.
Kylo Ren jolted out of sleep.
Breathless, his chest shining with sweat, he shook the hair out of his eyes.
In a swift, almost inhuman motion, he jumped out of bed and went straight to the vanity near his bed.
He gulped a few glasses of water, all the time fighting to catch his breath.
With a loud growl, he smashed his fist in the wall nearest to him.
He had a nightmare again. The same one he had for the past two weeks. He'd tried to shake it out of himself. He'd trained harder, meditated longer. He was more vicious in his conquering and ruthless in his domination of the galaxy.
But no matter how hard he tried, how hard he fought, he just could not... he could not fill up the void inside of him.
He felt utterly and completely alone.
And it was weakness that made him care and weakness that made him think about it.
He hated it.
All of it.
But most of all... he just felt broken. Physically broken. Like a part of him had died with his mother and Rey.
He never imagined that once they would be dead that's how he would feel.
Alone.
Angrily pulling his hair out of his eyes, he turned around and walked out of his room.
A*A*A
Rey made a powerful swoosh with her new lightsaber. She felt strange using it. As if Luke's had felt more her own than this one.
The color felt strange. A pure brilliant white.
The handle felt too hard against her hand, the weight a tad too heavy.
Still, she was happy to have a new lightsaber.
"Rey" an agonized whisper in her ear, in her heart. It made her look up. Nothing.
"Rey!" Poe shouted running towards her.
"Are you ready?" He said reaching her.
"Yes." She nodded putting her lightsaber away and gesturing to Poe to lead the way.
"You know you don't have to be the one who does this?" Poe said squeezing her elbow gently.
Rey nodded.
"Leia is like a mother to me, Poe. In fact the only one I have ever known." Rey said passionately.
Poe nodded.
They walked in silence for a while, before Rey spoke again.
"I am just so glad she is still alive." Rey smiled briefly.
"Me too, Rey. Me too." Poe grinned and together they entered the base.
A*A*A
Meanwhile on Supremacy
"Supreme Leader." Lieutenant Enoch said approaching Kylo Ren on the deck.
Kylo turned around with a powerful swoosh of his cape.
"What is it?" He said calmly, in a cold voice.
"General Organa, Sir. She is still alive."
Kylo's eyes narrowed. His heart started beating harder.
It wasn't possible. He hadn't felt her through the Force anymore. He still could not.
"We just got word from our base in the Triton System. Apparently General Organa and Maz Kanata were captured as they were trying to steal the blueprints for the new Star Destroyer."
The Triton System. That explained why he couldn't feel her. The distance, perhaps. And if she had also shut him out...
Kylo dismissed the Lieutenant and turned towards General Hux.
"Hux, I want you to oversee negotiations with the Senate. I need to personally investigate this matter." Kylo Ren said and then without waiting a reply, turned around and left the General staring after him.
"Of course Supreme Leader." Hux said sarcastically then turned around to bark more orders at his crew.
Kylo felt like he was possesed
He did not understand why he did not feel his mother through the Force.
And to think he'd been almost grieving.
What a fool.
Strapping the belt around his midrif and putting his saber in the holster at his hip Kylo turned towards the two stormtroopers waiting for him.
"Is my ship ready?" He asked, staring them down.
They both nodded.
With a sigh Kylo pushed past them and strode to his ship.
He felt strange.
Almost... no no. He refused to think like that.
He felt... well, he felt.. relieved.
If Leia was alive that meant that Rey... Rey could also be alive.
A*A*A
"Okay, Rey, let's go over this again." Poe said looking at her concerned.
"I press the button inside my left glove once and my real appearance becomes cloaked and I look like Captain Larisa. I press the button twice and ta da! I am me again." Rey said pointing at the glove as she was talking.
Poe nodded but still looked concerned.
"You can do this Rey. And remember, I will be waiting for your signal. R2D2 will be ready to deactivate the alarm system once you are in. Then you can grab the blueprints and find out where they are holding General Organa." Poe grabbed her shoulders. Staring deep into her eyes, he said: "You can do this. We count on you. The galaxy counts on you."
Rey nodded and pressed the button inside her glove once.
Her appearance changed immediately. Her hair became a thick blonde mane, her eyes turned a deep purple blue. Her regular attire was replaced by a First Order uniform and her voice changed pitch. Just like that, she was General Larisa Folda.
"Wow." Rose exclaimed. "Remember to not be nice or calm. General Larisa is renowned for her cruelty. "Rose added.
Rey nodded. Her and Finn exchanged a meaningful look.
Finn was the only one who could join her. As a former stormtrooper he not only knew his way around the ship but also knew how to walk and move as a stormtrooper.
"Ready?" Rey said.
With a longing look towards Rose and a squeze of her hand, Finn nodded and followed Rey into the ship.
A*A*A
"Supreme Leader." Captain Alfred bowed before Kylo Ren, staring up at him in awe. Alfred knew he was staring but that was the first time he had seen his Supreme Leader.
And what an awesome man he appeared. Dressed in all black, mask in place, not one inch of his body revealed to the eye.
More than his actual presence was the power that emanated from him.
Alfred shuddered inside.
"Where is General Folda?" Kylo Ren asked in his mechanical voice.
"The General is not-
"Right here, Supreme Leader." A blonde tall woman walked in with all the power and confidence of one who was used to being obeyed.
In reality, Rey was shaking violently inside, her heart beating so fast she could barely hear over the sound in her ear.
Beside her, Finn gulped.
Facing Kylo Ren head on, she wondered if she could somehow manage to get out of this situation whole.
"General." The man that had been talking to Kylo bowed before her.
"I thought you had already gone." He continued, looking confused.
"I" Rey swallowed. She cleared her throat. "I received word that the Supreme Leader will be coming so I postponed my trip."
In reality she doubted General Folda knew about anything. She was currently lying unconscios in one of the ship hangars and she would probably stay there for a good few hours.
With a nod, Alfred bowed again and left the room.
Kylo Ren turned towards her.
He regarded her curiously and she wondered whether he could feel her through the Force.
If he did, then the whole plan would fall to pieces and Leia would remain here for at least another few weeks.
Determined, Rey tried as best as she could to clear her mind, block him out somehow.
"A word in private, General." Kylo declared, striding out of the room into the General's cabin to the left of the deck.
What an arrogant ass. He just expects me to follow him? She thought, crossed her arms and humphed to herself.
Finn poked her hard in the ribs.
"Go!" He said.
With an annoyed sigh, she followed him into the room.
"I am here for the prisoners." He said, his voice changed by the mask.
Rey felt dumbstruck. She had forgotten the way he made her feel. The way he calmed her, chased the fears away.
Her gaze glided over his body, taking in every powerful inch. Her eyes stopped when she reached his hands.
Those hands...Had touched hers and her whole world had changed.
"General!" Kylo said more forcefully.
"Where are the prisoners?"
The prisoners? She had no idea. That's what she wanted to know as well.
"Aa-" Rey started but was interrupted by a stormtrooper marching in.
"Forgive me General, but there has been a breach. We suspect it's an attempt to free the prisoners. What are your orders?"
"Bring them here." Rey declared. The briliant idea came to her all of a sudden. She didn't need to go to them. And that would also answer Kylo's question.
"Yes General." He nodded and left the room.
Turning towards Kylo Ren, Rey said: "You will see the Prisoners my lord."
My lord.
Saying that felt strange. Not wrong. Which surely meant it was wrong?
He nodded brusquely.
Pacing across the room he appeared to be looking at the decorations in the room.
He seemed to consider something. Rey saw his fists clench then unclench.
Turning towards her abruptly, he stretched out his arm. Rey felt the pull. He was using the Force on her. To move her closer to him, to break through the defense in her mind.
But Rey did not move. She had no idea how to relent to him.
A look of sheer panic crossed her features.
In two powerful strides Kylo Ren stood right before her, only inches apart.
He grabbed her elbow tightly in his grip.
"Who are you?" He said accusingly.
"I am General Larisa Faldo. I am afraid we have not met before, hence the confusion Supreme Leader." Her heart was pounding, but her voice did not shake.
With a grunt Kylo released her and took a step back.
With precision, took off his cape first, then his gloves and finally his mask.
Rey could not help the gasp at seeing his face. It had been so long.
Oh, Ben.
Marching towards her once more, he asked again.
"Who are you? You've seen me. Now let me see you." He whispered the last sentence.
Leaning in close he touched her hand with his. The whisper of a carress at first.. the back of his hand against the back of hers.
Rey closed her eyes tightly.
She was overwhelmed.
Him.
The Force in him.
The Force between them.
She felt pure unadultered pleasure float in the space between then. As if the Force was pleased they were together. As if it had been planning for this very moment.
Leaning in closer, Kylo moved his fingers across her palm, the tips of her fingers.
The emotion she felt then, so foreign to her, seemed to take hold of her hand.
She knew she cared about Ben, wanted to see him come back to the light. She and him, they were alike, and that bonded them.
She knew all these feelings, but whatever she was feeling now.. this .. this was strange to her. It was like her body craved his touch. It was madness.
"I know who you are." He whispered in her ear. He was so close now that his hair tickled the side of her cheek. His hand moved upwards on her arm, inside her glove, his fingers deftly finding and pressing the button hidden there.
Immediately, Rey's appearance changed. The blonde hair was replaced by her dark tresses, woven together in an intricate braid.
Hazel eyes looked into dark eyes.
Depth regarded depth.
No words were spoken, but the fire in their eyes, the fire between them seemed to consume everything. Inside of themselves. Inside of the other.
Kylo Ren was left dumstruck by the beauty of the girl before him. A hunger in him was awakened. A hunger he feared could be and will not ever be fully satisfied.
A hunger not just for her power, but for her soul, for every inch of her.
Their hands became interlocked, breaths mingling.
"Rey." He said her name. A breath.
"Ben." She responded in the same breath.
But as soon as the words were spoken, the spell was broken, realisation sinking into their minds.
Rey's head seemed to clear. And in a swift motion, she pulled out her lightsaber and lit it up.
With a painful look, Kylo also withdrew his lightsaber, meeting Rey's with a forceful intensity.
To be continued...
Author's Note:
Really sorry for the delay. It's been a very busy couple of weeks! Hope you enjoyed it. Part II to come very soon. xx