A/N: I finally managed to get this chapter done! Next chapter will be the last one in this arc, so we can finally move on. I hope y'all like it!

Unbeta-ed and not mine!

Chapter 14: The nightmare begins: the aftermath part 1

Turns out summoning the mist was the easy part. As soon as the knights broke into the mist, chaos broke out. A few minutes into the planning, more men had volunteered, until there were about twenty-five in all. Only a few of them had sufficient magic to make a difference, but most put in a good effort. They made loud noises, threw leafy branches, anything to scare off the horses – and hopefully some knights as well.

They were not to be deterred, though. Arthur soon caught on to their scheme and ordered his knights to dismount and to proceed on foot. This would buy the fleeing women and children some time, but not enough. I needed more time, that was all, more time.

I closed my eyes and focused on the ley lines, like I'd been doing under Alahir's tutelage earlier that day. I knew the dangers now, knew not to let myself go, but to imagine a life-line holding me, binding me, to the present. That life-line was the man now leading a charge into the druid camp.

Magic surged within me, eager to answer my call and be let loose from its bindings. It prickled between my fingers and flowed into the trees, the roots around me. Soon, yells could be heard from the knights as they were encircled by vines and roots, holding them in place.

'Come on!' I mentally urged. My strength was waning, and I was afraid I wouldn't be able to hold them all off, especially since I was trying not to hurt them, when I suddenly heard a voice in my head.

'They're all gone, my lady,' Alahir announced. I felt his focus shift back to the fighting and refrained from sending a reply. He knew I'd heard him.

I dove behind a tree and let go of the magic creating the mist, but kept the roots and vines in place. As I peeked around the trunk, I gasped. A mere 30 feet from where I'd been standing, lay one of the men who had volunteered, his chest bloody, and eyes wide open. I stifled a scream and – against my better judgment – ran to him, completely disregarding my own safety.

Without thinking, I touched the man's arm, and relived his last, painful moments. I couldn't help but feel relieved that the soldier who had killed him was none that I knew. As I returned back to myself, I choked back a sob. I'd felt his pain as though it had been my own, and felt his grief for the wife he'd left behind. The man was barely a year older than myself, though I hadn't noticed it when I'd told him, along with the others of my plan.

How many others had I sent to their deaths?

I don't know how long I sat there, but I never moved, even when I heard footsteps getting closer. I knew most of the knights had already passed my position, but I just didn't care. I couldn't look away from the man's face. I didn't even know his name.

I was vaguely aware of someone talking and then shouting, but I didn't register the words. Then, hands gripped my shoulders and gently pulled me away from the scene. "Merlin, are you alright? Did that man hurt you?"

Numbly, I looked up into the kind eyes of Arthur Pendragon. I let out a sob and fell into his arms, crying for the life I had just seen ended, and for the dozens more that I knew were out there.

A thought occurred to me: what if Arthur had killed any of them?

I shoved that thought firmly to the back of my mind, I couldn't think like that. "Where – where's Morgana?" I managed to ask, ignoring his earlier question.

"She's fine. Some druids were trying to lead her away, but we got her. They got away, but we'll find them eventually," he explained patiently. "Did you… that man, did you… touch him?" he asked hesitantly.

For a moment, I considered denying it. I knew Arthur wasn't entirely comfortable with that power, but he deserved the truth – or, at least, as much of the truth as I could afford. "He was in so much pain…" I whispered.

Arthur drew me closer to him, and I basked in the warmth that seeped into me. "I'm sorry you had to see that…"

"I don't just see it, Arthur, I become them every time I do that. I die with them every single time."

Arthur apparently didn't know how to reply to that, so he just kept holding me. I wasn't sure how long I stood in his embrace, but I knew we couldn't do this for much longer, if anyone saw… So when I heard footsteps, I gently pushed the prince away and stood at a more appropriate distance.

"My lord," the knight said when he came close enough. "Most of the druids got away," he reported. "We counted some 15 dead, most of them adult men."

"How many of ours?" Arthur asked grimly. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was aware that Arthur hated these kind of raids, too, and that he was just doing his duty, but all I could think of was the 15 men dead. Their families would never see them again, they would never even know what became of them.

"None, sire," the knight replied.

"Did we take any prisoners?" I asked, my eyes sweeping he forest around us. I knew I wouldn't see any more dead, but I couldn't help myself.

The knight looked at Arthur in askance. The Prince nodded. "None, milady, they either got away or perished."

I didn't bother correcting him on the title he afforded me. He must've been new at the castle. I nodded at his answer. "Bury the dead, they deserve at least that much," I said, and with those words, made my way to where the other knights and soldiers were gathering in search of Morgana. I could use a friend right now.

/*/

It seemed that Morgana was not in the mood to offer any condolences. She standing near Sir Leon, a blanket covering her shivering shoulders. She was in shock.

As I approached, I nodded to Leon. He took my cue and moved further away, offering us some semblance of privacy. I didn't hesitate. I pulled the lady into an embrace and let her hide her face.

It wasn't long before she started crying. "They're dead, Merlin, they're all dead. They killed them," the Lady whispered hoarsely, through her tears. "It's all my fault."

"Shhh, no, they're not all dead, most of them got away, Morgana," I replied equally quiet. Holding on to that thought, I bolstered myself. My friend needed me, and I couldn't dwell on the 15 men that hadn't made it out. "This was a big camp, and all the women and children got away. Apparently Emrys organized them and helped them escape."

Morgana pulled back and looked at me incredulously. "You saw him?" she questioned.

I shook my head, hoping I had a straight face. Technically, I hadn't seen Emrys, there hadn't been a mirror nearby. "No, but one of the druids told me. The men who died had volunteered to slow the soldiers down…"

Morgana looked like she was getting angry now. She couldn't blame the knights, they were just following orders. "Arthur ordered to give them proper burials, they'll have that, at least."

"Without the rituals of their people it hardly matters," Morgana replied bitterly, staring into the direction of the former camp.

I put my hands on the taller woman's shoulders. "He can hardly go find a druid to speak the words of the Old Religion now, my lady, he's doing all he can. You know he hates these kinds of things, he's only following orders," I said, hoping to disarm her anger somewhat.

Morgana frowned at me. "You're right…" Inwardly, I breathed a sigh of relief, perhaps she would be able to let this go after all. "Uther is the one behind this," she hissed, and my hope vanished. "He's the one with blood on his hands." She turned away from me, looking off into the forest that wasn't marred by the evidence of a fight. "We could have lived here, Merlin, we could have been happy among these people."

I felt my eyes widen. "You wanted to live here? You wanted me to live here?" I asked. I was surprised she'd thought about that, and a little flattered, too.

She turned back to me, grabbing my hands. "They would have protected us, I could have protected us, given some practice. I'm sure I could have. It would be them lying there dead instead of our friends," she spat, gesturing to the knights and soldiers milling about.

I was more than a little shocked and horrified at the gentle lady's thoughts. "Morgana, no. Magic must never be used for evil, and murder, even in defense of those who cannot defend themselves, is evil. Emrys didn't kill a single soldier for that reason, I think. They were just following orders."

Morgana looked a little chastised. "I know, I'm sorry. I just can't help but think about those who lost their lives today, they will never be with their families again…"

It was so similar to what I'd thought that I pulled her back into my embrace.

/*/

I was grateful that I'd worn breeches and a tunic when I'd left with Morgana, riding sidesaddle was not an option. Arthur had taken one extra horse with him for Morgana, so I offered to walk alongside them, but the Lady had protested. She argued that it would take us at least a few hours extra if we were to go so slowly that I would have to walk, and we'd have to take more breaks. She also said that it wasn't fair to me, seeing as they had just freed me from imprisonment. That was a blatant lie, one that she'd argued against just hours before, but she wasn't above using petty excuses.

So now I was seated behind Sir Leon on his horse. I could tell that Arthur wanted me with him, but it wasn't a good idea.

Leon was nice enough, making polite conversation from time to time, telling me a little bit about his family. It was more than any other knight would have done, so I was grateful. I told him a few of my own childish escapades with Will. I could tell that Arthur was listening, but I ignored him. I had to keep my distance.

Sooner than I'd like, we were back in Camelot. Morgana and Arthur were summoned before the King, and I had to attend to them.

Morgana was a far more skilled liar than I could ever hope to be. I'd been so distracted on the way home, I hadn't thought of a cover story for how we'd ended up with the druids, but, luckily, Morgana had.

"We were attacked, but managed to get away. The druids were simply offering shelter, they weren't doing any harm!" she argued. Arthur stayed quiet, wisely not mentioning Morgana's conflicting stories.

"Regardless, they practice magic, so they would have been sentenced to die either way. Arthur did well."

Morgana uttered a sound of impatience. "They were helping us! Offering food and water and not expecting anything in return, how does that make them evil?"

Uther was beginning to lose his patience. "You were with them for less than a day, Morgana, and be grateful, they could have had ulterior motives without your knowledge."

Morgana opened her mouth to argue, but I intervened. I stepped forward, now standing next to Morgana. "Thank you sire, we're very grateful for your timely rescue. I'm sure the Lady Morgana is simply wearied from her toils and the long journey. Perhaps she should rest?"

Both Morgana and Uther glared at me, but I ignored the former. Uther's stare made shivers run up my spine. He could have me killed right now. What was I thinking speaking up like that?

"She's probably right, father, Morgana needs rest. Merlynn can look after her for the remainder of the day," Arthur said before his father could say anything.

I held my breath as Uther turned his heated glare from me to his son. "Very well," he said eventually. "Get some rest, Morgana, I expect you at breakfast tomorrow morning. And you should treat your King with more respect."

I curtsied. "Thank you, sire," I said, and dragged Morgana off, before she could protest or make the situation worse.

A/N: So, what did you think? I was nice and didn't leave a cliffie this time. Next chapter won't be up until late January at the earliest, because I've got finals until the 19th, so I won't have much time to write.

Still, review!