Disclaimer: I do not own any of the material appearing in this story.
BGM: Hot Times in Mt. Lavalava (Paper Mario)
"Phew! As if the jungle wasn't humid enough…" Weiss complained as they walked in. "Remind me to never go into another volcano once we're done here."
"I thought Bowser's Kingdom was hot…" Ruby said.
"…Wait a minute, doesn't some of us wear dark clothing?" Hana wondered.
"Oh great, it's also a death trap for some of us!" Yang complained.
"What's wrong with dark clothing?" Elise asked as Hana whispered into her ear. "…This is NOT how I want to go out!"
"Relax! I got the perfect solution for this." Sushie said and proceeded to spit out water at them all. "There ya go!"
"…I'd be complaining that you spit on us, but that actually felt good." Weiss said as a Piranha Plant appeared in front of them.
"Whoa, hello!" Luigi exclaimed.
"Intruders alert! Subjects identified as Mario and Loogie, RWBY and some other people! Alert the boss!" The Piranha Plant shouted and then disappeared into the ground.
"Loogie?" Luigi asked.
"Well, at least they got the "Lu" part right." Elise pointed out.
"Wrong letters though…" Luigi sighed.
"I guess we don't matter…" Kamui mumbled as they walked into the next area… and it was filled with tons of magma.
"Oh good lord…" Weiss wiped the sweat off her forehead.
"Phew… it had to be a volcano." Blake said.
"Tally-ho!" Kolorado said as he hopped onto the first lava rock… and it sank and he touched the lava. "YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!" He yelled, shooting up like a rocket and landing. "Ow ow ow ow!"
"Are you okay?!" Sakura asked as she and Elise healed him up.
"Y-yes… just a burnt bottom! How about you guys go ahead… I'll just nurse this burn wound of mine and catch up…"
"If you say so." Elise said as they jumped across the lava rocks and being careful not to touch the lava… but as for Arthur, as soon as he landed on a rock, it split in two.
"Uh oh." Arthur said as he jumped onto the other side… where it split into more pieces until he was on a small piece of rock. "Um… I need some assistance!"
"…How in the… it was sturdy for all of us!" Yang said as they were on the other side while Mario and Luigi hammered some Podoboos away as Weiss formed an ice bridge for Arthur to cross. He walked on it, but then it actually melted on him as he tried to run, but then he slipped on some slush… and fell into the lava.
"YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!" Arthur screamed as he landed with the others… unfortunately, he landed on a Podoboo. "Ow ow ow OOOOOW!" He yelled, causing Weiss to sweatdrop as Sushie put the fire out and Sakura and Elise went right to healing him.
"I… uh… never seen a man with bad luck that bad." Weiss said.
"Ahahaha! It'll take more than lava to take me down!" Arthur said as he got back up on his feet. "Now let's go!" He said.
"…He recovered like it was nothing?!" Weiss exclaimed in surprise. "He just fell into the lava for Oum's sake!"
"Nothing ever really takes him down… and it's impressive." Elise smiled.
"S-still… I'm worried that one of these days, h-he'll…"
"Oh, don't worry about it, Sakura! He won't go out due to his bad luck! I guarantee it!" Elise said with a confident smile as they went onward and they went down a zipline where they saw a few Spike Tops minding their own business.
"Oooh, what's in here?" Hana asked as she and Subaki took a look inside the other room.
"…Eh, nothing but firebars in an empty hall." Subaki said.
"How boring." Hana sighed as they walked to catch up with the others as Effie made quick work on the unsuspecting Spike Tops while Mario jumped over and grabbed a POW Block before jumping down.
"Where'd you guys go?" Kamui asked as she noticed Hana and Subaki approaching.
"Some boring hallway with firebars." Hana said.
"That bad?" Sakura asked.
"There was nothing worth it at the end either." Subaki said.
"Oh…"
They went down a bit further where they came across a metal block as Mario and Luigi hammered it… but nothing happened except a small shockwave went through their bodies. "Yeesh!" Luigi said.
"M-M-Mama mia!" Mario said.
"Here… let me." Effie said as she walked over to it and pulled back her fist and punched the metal block… but to her surprise, it didn't break but left a huge dent in it. "…Huh." She said, pulling it back and shaking it off.
"Something that can withstand your strength?!" Elise exclaimed in surprise. "How?!"
"I think I need to eat more." Effie said as they went down another zipline, but Arthur unfortunately fell… he did, however, find the Fire Shield badge.
"Oooh!" Arthur grinned as he took and equipped it as he jumped down… and unfortunately, Luigi broke his fall.
"OOOOF!"
"Ha! What luck! Someone broke my fall!"
"That would be me…" Luigi groaned.
"Oh, sorry!" Arthur got up and then Sakura healed him up as they went to the right and took down a Spike Top and a Putrid Piranha Plant, but it was nothing more than a dead end… well, that is until they saw a zip line up top.
"Well, how do we get up there?" Ruby wondered.
"I can punch that metal box some more until it finally breaks." Effie said.
"I'll join you on that one!" Yang said.
"…I wonder…" Mario backed up and did a triple front flip, but he was nowhere close to it… and then Luigi tried it and he didn't get close enough either.
"Well, that didn't work." Luigi said.
"Oh sure, use your athletic abilities and leave us in the dust. I see how it is!" Weiss said.
"Eheheh… sorry." Mario awkwardly rubbed the back of his head as they walked off to the left and found a lava river.
"Hmm, any ideas?" Elise asked.
"Well, we can use those blocks on top to stop the flow of lava." Subaki said. "It has to be perfect too, so I suggest three of us go up there and-"
"Or just let Weiss take care of it." Hana interrupted as Weiss formed an ice bridge.
"…Or that too." Subaki grumbled as they walked on through safely… though Arthur seemed kind of in a hurry, just to be on the safe side… and then when they got into the next room…
"Aha! Hold it right there!" A voice interrupted them as they saw a red Magikoopa and a few dozen Podoboos.
"Wow… I didn't know Kamek loved red." Ruby said.
"WHAT?! I'm not Kamek, you lousy red head! The name's Mike, thank you very much!"
"…Magic Mike?" Elise asked.
"No! Good heavens no! Who names their kid "Magic"? Next thing you tell me is that some unloving mother named their kid Doopliss!" He said. "Anyway, I'm here to stop you… Podoboos, attack!" He ordered as he fired magic to power them up.
"Oh dear, powered up Podoboos. Whatever shall we do?" Weiss sarcastically said as they all looked at Sushie.
"You might want to hold your breath on this one." She advised and then proceeded to use Tidal Wave, flooding the entire area.
"Mmmph!" Sakura exclaimed in surprise.
"…Good heavens, are you trying to drown them?!" Bow exclaimed, seemingly not fazed by the water as the tidal wave disappeared, as the Podoboos were dead, the lava was all burned out and the Magikoopa was spitting out water like a fountain while everyone was coughing out water.
"Ya could've warned us you were gonna flood the place…" Blake said, coughing out some water.
"…Okay, that could've gone better, but no matter, I can still take you on!" He said… and then Effie went over and punched him hard enough to go through the volcano walls before he stopped near the entrance. "Ow…"
"Well, that's one way to get rid of the lava." Subaki said, shaking it off as they went toward the treasure chest… and pulled out two Ultra Hammers.
"Oh, nice!" Luigi said.
"Hey bro, you thinking what I'm thinking?" Mario asked.
"Oh yeah!" Luigi nodded as they hammered the metal block without breaking a sweat, as Effie looked on in surprise.
"That worked?!" Effie exclaimed.
"Hammers that are tougher than Effie? What world are we living in?!" Elise asked.
"A jacked up one, that's for sure." Hana said as they went off and got to the other side where Kolorado was waiting for them.
"That's a peculiar dent…" Kolorado mused before the Bros hammered the block. "And now it's not as peculiar. Onward!"
How did he get here so soon? Blake wondered as they walked into the next room.
"TREASURE!" Kolorado yelled as he took a leap… only to realize what he did. "…Uh oh…" He paled as he tried to hurry back before falling to the ground below.
THUD!
"Oh my goodness!" Sakura gasped.
Elise looked down. "Hey! Are you okay down there?"
"Y-yeah… I'm fine…!"
"Don't worry, we'll come heal you!"
"No, don't! I don't need healing!"
"You sure?"
"Y-yes… the ground needed a hug… I'm not hurt at all… except for my butt and my pride…" He groaned while saying that last part silently so Elise and Sakura wouldn't hear him. "I'll be up… momentarily!"
"Okay…" Elise said.
"…I'm amazed that he didn't get himself killed yet." Hana said.
"Yeah." RWBY, the Mario Bros and Kamui said in agreement as they went through the zipline and worked their way down after landing… only as they were walking, a Spiny Tromp landed behind them as they turned.
"Ah! It's a trap!" Luigi exclaimed.
"Quick! Behind me!" Bow said… only for Effie to stand in front of her. "Effie, what are you doing?!"
"Stand back." She said as she got into position, and pulled back her fist before punching the Spiny Twomp as it exploded into pieces as soon as her fist made contact with it.
"…Good heavens!" Bow exclaimed.
"WHAT?!" RWBY yelled.
"Still got it." Effie said.
"Yay! You did it!" Elise cheered and hugged Effie while Kamui explained to them that Effie's strength Is stupidly overpowered.
"Oh my…" Yang said.
"And now I'm scared to spar with her…" Weiss said.
Effie turned around. "So! Let's get going, shall we?"
"Yes." Mario nodded as they walked off into a new area. "Hmm…"
"What's up, bro?" Luigi asked.
"I don't know why, but I have a sneaking suspicion that one of these days, I'll have to rescue Peach and fight Bowser in a volcano soon." Mario said.
"…Nah, I doubt Bowser would go that far." Luigi said.
"Maybe he would." Weiss said.
"Oh! Maybe Bowser will be taking a bath in the volcano!" Ruby said as everyone looked at her as if she lost her mind. "What?"
"Now that's the dumbest thing I've heard all day. Who would take a bath in a volcano?" Weiss asked.
"Groudon." Mario and Luigi said.
"I don't know who that is, but I'm not going to ask!" Weiss said.
"Hmm, you're right. I doubt Bowser would do such a thing." Mario said.
"That'd be a sight to behold, though." Kamui said as they walked off and came across a dead end… and then Kolorado came running in.
"Ooooh, I can smell the treasure in here!" Kolorado grinned.
"How'd you get here so fast?!" Blake exclaimed.
"My sense of adventuring, of course! Now… let's see here… where oh where could that entrance be…" He mused, unaware of the bros went back since they saw some blocks to destroy… and on the last one, a Spiny Tromp rolled down, forcing them to jump off in time.
"HEY, HEADS UP!" Mario called out to them.
"Whoa, incoming!" Yang exclaimed as they got out of the way… except for Kolorado.
"What are you crazy?! Get out of the way!" Hana shouted.
"Not yet, I can smell the entrance… if I can just find a button, I'll be – YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" He cried as the Spiny Tromp crushed him, destroyed the wall and kept on going, while Hana facepalmed at this.
"Okay, now you need us healing you." Elise said.
"N-nonsense, it barely nicked me…"
"BARELY?!" Hana yelled, as it seemed that her patience with this Koopa was running thin, and then Sakura and Elise healed him right up.
"Hup hup! Thank you!" Kolorado said and took off.
"…I'm surprised that didn't kill him…" Hana grumbled.
"He's a stubborn ol' Koopa, I'll give him that." Yang said as they walked after him only to reach a dead end with a Super Shroom and a Maple Syrup.
"Where's the treasure? It should be here!" Kolorado said before sighing and turned around. "Forgive me, my treasure senses can lead me into a dead end from time to time."
I'm amazed it hasn't killed you yet. Hana thought as they went down while Kolorado decided to stick around for a bit as they went down and hit the final area where a Putrid Piranha Plant came up.
"Mario and friends are still coming! They're most likely coming for that Star Spirit!" He said before disappearing.
"Thanks for telling us that!" Ruby said as they walked over a bit further before the place rumbled a little… before a huge Piranha Plant appeared before them from a pool of lava.
End BGM
BGM: Lava Piranha Attack (Paper Mario)
"Bleck hyuck hyuck yuck!" Lava Piranha cackled. "Welcome, Mario and friends! You've made it!"
"Oh, joy…" Weiss muttered before they got in a battle position.
"Ha! You don't look so tough!" Yang said.
"Yeah, we'll cut you down to size!" Ruby said.
"Blah blah blah, you'll cut me down to size, how unoriginal!" Lava Piranha taunted. "Ha, your team is laughable, you have a useless one on your team!"
"Hey now, I may be a scaredy cat, but I'm anything but useless!" Luigi said.
"I wasn't talking to you, greenie! I was talking about that little girl next to that samurai!"
"M-Me?" Sakura pointed to herself.
"Yes, you!" Lava Piranha said. "You just look like a frail little girl who can't take a hit! Oh, look at me, I can heal and nothing else! Oh, how stupid of me!"
"Hey! Don't talk to Lady Sakura that way!" Subaki said defensively.
"Yeah!" Hana nodded.
"Oh, look at me, I have a couple of lieges that protect me while I do nothing! Oh, woe is me! Woe is me!"
"…Wh-where is this coming from?" Sakura asked, seeming to have been taken aback by this and tearing up a little. "I'm… I'm not useless!"
"If you're not useless, then show me!" Lava Piranha said. "If you have the guts, ya pathetic shy girl!"
"No one talks to Sakura that way!" Elise growled.
"Then come at me, then!"
"Sakura, you have your bow, right?" Hana asked.
"Y-yeah…"
"Then you might as well use it 'cause we're gonna prove this overgrown flower wrong!" Hana smirked, pulling out her sword.
"R-right." Sakura nodded, putting her staff away and bringing out her bow.
End BGM
BGM: Go, Mario, Go! Phase 1 (Paper Mario)
"Bleck hyuck hyuck yuck! This is gonna be fun!" Lava Piranha cackled as the Lava Buds proceeded to shoot out fireballs at the gang, but they quickly avoided it. So Lava Piranha himself breathed fire at Hana and Yang, but they jumped up as Yang shot the Lava Piranha while Hana ran over and slashed, while making sure to jump over the small lava pit.
Mario aimed his hammer at Lava Piranha and quickly threw it, hitting him hard on the head as Luigi did the same thing as they ran over to grab them while Subaki flew in on his Pegasus and impaled the Lava Piranha a few times while Ruby, Weiss, and Blake shot it.
"Oh, if only I had something elemental that'd work here!" Luigi said. "Like lightning!"
"I doubt lightning would work with you." Mario said.
Luigi sighed. "A man can dream!" He said.
"Lady Sakura! Do it!" Subaki said as he dodged the fireballs.
"R-Right!" Sakura exclaimed and then aimed her bow at him and stopped herself from looking at him. "S-Sorry about this!" She said and released the bow, hitting Lava Piranha who was a bit preoccupied with Kamui and Bow.
"Ah! So you do have potential!" Lava Piranha said. "But your potential is as large as your bravery, which there isn't any to begin with!" He said and breathed fire right at Sakura as she screamed, but Effie got in the way and blocked it with her shield.
"Oh, put a sock in it!" Effie said, throwing her lance like a javelin and it went right through Lava Piranha's neck-vine as he screamed in agony before sinking into the lava below.
End BGM
"Is it over?" Ruby asked.
"Yup!" Elise grinned as Arthur picked up Effie's lance and tossed it to her.
"Thank you." Effie said.
"I-I can't believe we did it." Sakura said.
"Alright, let's go find that Star Spirit and-" The place rumbled and interrupting Weiss, and then Lava Piranha came out, and was on fire.
BGM: Go, Mario, Go! Phase 2 (Paper Mario)
"BLECK HYUCK HYUCK YUCK! I'M NOT DONE YET, FOOLS!" Lava Piranha cackled and breathed fire at them, forcing them to dodge the attacks. Weiss quickly made glyphs and fired icicles on the Lava Piranha, and while it did hurt him, he laughed it off as the Lava Buds summoned Petit Piranhas before launching fireballs.
"Wah!" Elise yelped as she tried to avoid the fireballs and then growled. "Alright, that's it!" She said and then pulled out a tome. "Moonlight!"
"Good call on that!" Hana said as she ran over and slashed him repeatedly before jumping away from a fireball while Subaki was avoiding the fireballs on his Pegasus before he repeatedly stabbed the head before getting back to a safe distance.
"Never fear! I will help you in this endeavor!" A voice exclaimed as they turned to see Kolorado coming in hot. "YAAAAAAAH!" He yelled… and then he fell into the lava. "YOOOW OW OW OW OOOOOW!" He yelled and then hopped out. "Sorry, ol' chaps! I've done all I could!" He said and took off.
"YOU IDIOT!" Hana yelled before getting slapped away by the Lava Piranha, dropping her sword in the process. "Ooof!"
"Hana!" Sakura called and went to heal her, but Lava Piranha breathed fire right at Sakura's direction, but Weiss blocked with an ice barrier and then Ruby jumped up on the ice and slashed the Lava Piranha as Kamui and Arthur were behind the Piranha and slashed it several times while Sakura healed up Hana.
"Thanks…" Hana smiled and reached for her sword. "…Wait a minute, where's my sword?"
"Bleck hyuck hyuck yuck! How boring, the princess is doing nothing but healing… and those arrows aren't doing justice either!"
Sakura noticed the sword as it was dangerously close to the Lava Piranha as she gulped. "I'll go get it!" She said and went toward it.
"Lady Sakura, wait!"
"Cover me!"
"Right!" Hana nodded. With WHAT, though? She thought.
"Hah!" Ruby yelled, using her semblance and activated her Ruby Palm, shooting at the Lava Piranha from behind, but the Lava Piranha turned around and smacked her away toward the lava. "Ooof!" She grunted, but luckily Subaki flew in and caught her. "Thanks!"
Sakura quickly made it to the sword. "I got it!" She said as Lava Piranha turned to her. "Eeep!"
"Lady Sakura, I'm coming!" Hana said, but one of the Lava Buds threw a fireball and hit Hana. "Gah!"
"Argh! I'd be helping her if it weren't for these Petit Piranhas!" Sushie complained as Bow and the Bros were preoccupied with them.
"Just stay focused!" Bow said, slapping them away with her fan.
"Well well well, what are you gonna do with that sword?" Lava Piranha asked. "Give yourself a manicure with it?"
"N-no!"
"Well, don't just stand there, use it on me!" Lava Piranha exclaimed, then noticed her shaking legs. "Or, are you too scared?"
"I-I'm not!"
"You're just a cowardly girl who only uses potshots with that bow of yours!" He kept taunting as Sakura teared up hearing this. "What's the matter, you cry baby? Does the truth hurt? Bleck hyuck hyuck yuck!"
"Sakura! Don't listen to him!" Elise said, healing up Arthur… only to get pelted with fireballs. "AGH!"
"ELISE!" Sakura shrieked.
"You gonna stand up to your friends or do I have to go and kill them all? Oh wait, you already know the answer because YOU ARE USELESS! That's what your family thinks… if you have any!"
"I-I'm not useless and my family… doesn't think I'm useless either!"
"Aww, they're just saying that to make you feel better, but in reality, they all think that!"
"No, they don't!" Hana said, holding on to her arm. "Her family loves her… her friends love her… and so do her retainers… like me!"
"And me!" Subaki said, coming in to chop him up but Lava Piranha pelted him and Hana with fireballs before turning around and doing the same to the others.
"Make your choice, useless brat! It's either me or them!"
"I'm… I'm not… going to let you kill them!" Sakura said, pointing Hana's sword at Lava Piranha.
"Really? Because it seems you are! You know what you are? You're a useless brat and your family doesn't even care about you! They'd be more than happy to throw you to the streets!"
"Urgh…! Don't listen to him!" Kamui said and dodged a fireball.
"Sh-shut up…" Sakura quietly said, tearing up hard with tears running down her cheeks.
"Oh, it's the truth, little one! Your friends, family and retainers are all gonna die and it'll be your fault! Oh, look at me, I'm a dainty little girl who'll do nothing but watch her family and friends die before her! Useless! Useless! USELESS! USELESS! USELESS! USELESS! And you wanna know what else?! No one. Loves. You."
"Shut up…" Sakura kept saying it over and over again while he was bad mouthing her… until eventually… something inside her snapped. "SHUT UP… SHUT UP! SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!" She screamed and slashed Lava Piranha.
"Argh!"
Sakura kept attack him over and over while screaming bloody murder at him while everyone else looked on in shock while Lava Piranha fell over… but Sakura wasn't done yet… she kept impaling him repeatedly in the head.
"Sakura! SAKURA!" Elise yelled.
"Sakura, snap out of it!" Ruby said.
"Lady Sakura!" Hana ran over and grabbed a hold of her from behind. "Get a hold of yourself!" She exclaimed as Sakura kept screaming with tears running down her cheeks. "Snap out of it, please!" She pleaded. "…For the love of Naga, Sakura!" She cried when the sword was shot out of Sakura's hands thanks to Blake.
To their surprise, Sakura reached for the already-dead Lava Piranha and tried to strangle it, but Hana quickly got around her and tried to push her away as Sakura kept screaming and saying "Let me go! I'm not finished with him yet!"
"…Forgive me…" Hana whispered and then slapped Sakura's cheek hard enough to have her snap out of it.
End BGM
"Wh-what…?" Sakura whispered as she saw what she did. "Oh… oh gods… wh-what have I done?!"
Hana sighed. "You went a bit… crazy."
"And you didn't stop me?!" Sakura cried. "I… I murdered someone and… and…"
"Hey, it's okay. It's all over now." Hana said. "…Besides, you didn't actually kill someone, it was mostly a plant. I believe that's way different." She said, but Sakura trembled.
"Oh gods… I… I…"
Hana hugged her. "It's alright… it's all over." She whispered as Elise came over and hugged her too, followed by Subaki, Kamui, Arthur and Effie… while Yang kicked the Lava Piranha's head into the lava.
"That's that." Yang said.
"Um… sorry for slapping you…" Hana whispered as she retrieved her sword.
"I-it's alright… you had to do what you had to do…" Sakura quietly said.
"Well… I don't know about you, but what you did was awesome!" Elise grinned. "Seriously, I haven't seen anyone go insane like that!"
"…I doubt it was awesome…" Sakura sighed.
"Oh, don't feel too bad!" A voice said as they turned to see Misstar, a pink Star Spirit with a gold ribbon, floating over to them as Mario touched the card. "We all have our breaking points. It's perfectly natural if you snapped."
"…I don't like it though…"
"Well, we can put this all behind us." Mario said.
"Right." Luigi nodded.
"Well, all's well that ends well!" Ruby smiled.
Meanwhile, at Peach's Cas-
"WAIT A MINUTE!" Weiss yelled, flailing her arms and looked at the screen. "We can't just turn the scene over to Peach right now!"
"Weiss, why are you breaking the fourth wall? It's totally out of character for you." Ruby said.
"First of all, everyone's been breaking the fourth wall! I was bound to do it some time! And excuse me for interrupting, but wasn't it said that the volcano was about to erupt at any second?!" Weiss said… and right on cue, the volcano started rumbling.
BGM: Vs. Ridley (Metroid: Other M)
"Uh oh!" Elise exclaimed.
"Quick! Go go go go!" Misstar said.
"Coming through!" Kolorado ran over as they quickly ran over to the other side and climbed up the stairs… only Kolorado looked behind. "I'll be right back, I'm getting the treasure!"
"What?! Are you crazy?!" Hana exclaimed, as the volcano rumbled harder.
"Ack! It's probably just kids playing with fireworks!" Kolorado said and then went down… and got burned. "YOW! What's this… lava?!"
"Ah geez, we're trapped!" Ruby exclaimed as Effie noticed a crack in the wall.
"No, we're not!" Effie said, punching the crack to make a hole in the wall as they quickly ran into it as the lava was quickly catching up to them only to reach a dead end… and there was a treasure chest right on top, and on the way up was the only way out.
"The treasure!" Kolorado exclaimed.
"Quick, get on my Pegasus!" Subaki said as Sakura, Elise and Hana got on while Kamui transformed into her dragon form.
"Anyone getting on?" Kamui asked as the Mario Bros and RWBY hopped on while Bow held on to Sushie.
"No! No! I'm not leaving until I get this treasure!" Kolorado said.
"Oh, for heaven's sake!" Misstar groaned as she grabbed Kolorado as they flew up right as the lava reached them and then it built up quickly behind them… but luckily, they made it out of the volcano right as it blew up on them as they landed safely.
End BGM
"My beautiful treasure… it's gone… forever…!" Kolorado whined. "Now I'll never be able to get it!"
"…Alright, THAT'S IT!" Hana said right before Misstar was about to say something as she walked straight to Kolorado. "Hey!"
Kolorado turned to her. "Yes?" He asked… and then Hana slapped him. "OW!"
"You are so unbelievable, it's not even funny!" Hana started. "All you care about is 'treasure' this and 'treasure' that! Your lust for this ONE item is unreal, so much so that you nearly got killed a load of times! You never thought about your health, you only cared about treasure! And you didn't think about us either! You were only worried about what was in that treasure box. If anything, the greatest treasure of all is your own life, so you might as well treasure it, because one day, NO ONE will know where you are and by the time they find you, it'll be too late because you'll be LONG dead lusting over this treasure!"
Hana then grabbed him by the collar. "Now you listen to me, you treasure happy Koopa. You either stop this lust for treasure right now, or so help me, you are gonna regret it in the long run! Because like I said, the greatest treasure of all is your own life."
"Th-that's not entirely true! My greatest treasure is my wife!"
"THEN WHY AREN'T YOU TREASURING HER INSTEAD, YOU NUMBSKULL?!" Hana yelled. "I've the most patient Samurai out there-"
"I wouldn't call you patient." Subaki snickered.
"I'll get to you later, buddy." She glared before glaring back at Kolorado. "-But with you and your lust for treasure, you've been doing NOTHING but testing my patience and getting yourself nearly killed with all this!"
She then shoved him down. "Now you better treasure your wife, because one of these days, you're gonna come back home and she won't be home, either in the hospital or worse. All because you worry her sick over these pointless treasure hunts! Your wife is the greatest treasure there is, so you better start treasuring her or so help me, I will drag you back to your home myself! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!"
"B-but-"
"NO BUTS!"
Kolorado sighed. "…I guess I do need to spend time with the missus more often. I think I need to do that more…" He said as he got back up. "I'm a changed Koopa. Now, back to Koopa Village! ONWARD!"
THUD!
What had fallen in front of him… was the treasure chest. "AHA! IT'S SAFE!" He cheered, causing Hana to facepalm as Kolorado pulled out a vase. "Ah… that's more like it!" He said. "Now… starting now, I'll be home more often! ONWARD!"
"Oi vey…" Hana grumbled.
"Couldn't have said it better myself." Misstar said.
"Well, I guess we can change scenes now…" Weiss said.
Right, um… at Peach's Castle!
BGM: Princess in Distress (Paper Mario)
"Zzzz…" A Koopatrol snoozed away as Peach opened the door.
"Oh good, he's asleep." Peach grinned as she snuck out with Tiki and Twink.
"You sure you heard something?" Tiki asked.
"Yeah." Peach nodded as they snuck around the castle before finding the correct door as they heard chattering and yelling.
"You sure this is a good idea?" Twink asked.
"Yeah, I'm with Twink." Tiki said.
"Hey, I can't help but be curious!" Peach said as they walked in… to see a Koopatrol and two Hammer Bros.
"And I'm telling YOU that we need one more player!"
"Well, no one else wants to play!" The Koopatrol protested.
"What are you guys playing?" Peach asked as they turned.
"Ack! Peach and Tiki are here?!" The Koopatrol exclaimed.
"Wait! One of them can play!" Hammer Bro said. "After all, we need another player."
"I vote Tiki! She's more beautiful than Peach! …Uh, no offense." The other Hammer Bro said.
"Oh, don't worry about it. Even I think Palutena is prettier than I am." Peach said while Tiki was blushing.
"You think I'm beautiful?" Tiki asked in surprise.
"…I change my mind about the vote! I never thought Peach was so humble!"
"Hey!"
"Your vote was already casted." Koopatrol said.
"Crud!"
"I vote for a cosmic space princess!" Hammer Bro said.
"…You have GOT to let that go. She ain't real."
"Oh, ye of little faith!"
"The only princess here is Peach, so you voted for Peach… as do I." Koopatrol said.
"Alright, let's do this!" The Hammer Bro said as they went into an impromptu game show-like arena.
"Oh… I thought they were playing Smash on the Wii U." Twink said.
"That's what I was thinking." Tiki said.
End BGM
BGM: Quiz: Challenge (Miitopia)
"Alright, welcome to the 64th annual quiz show!"
When was the first one on the air? Peach wondered.
"Alright, first to get as many points as possible in under the minute wins!" The Koopatrol said. "Alright, first question: Who is Mario's favorite gal in the whole wide world? Is it A: Pauline. B: Princess Peach. Or C: Birdo?"
Peach answered. "It's me… hopefully."
"Correct!"
Peach blushed with a sigh of relief. Thank goodness.
"Next question: Where is the next Star Spirit located? Is it A: Hooktail Castle. B: Hyrule or C: Flower Fields?"
"Flower Fields!" Hammer Bro said.
"Correct! Next question: Where did Nyx live before she was forced to move? Was it: A: Gusty Gulch. B: New Donk City. Or C: Ylisse?"
Peach answered. "I believe she said Gusty Gulch."
"Correct! Next question: How do you get to Flower Fields? A: Take a train. B: Get the Bub-ulb seeds from different parts of the area, or C: Ask some guy who digs up graves in a graveyard for a living?"
Peach answered. "I know this one. You get the Bub-ulb seeds from different parts of the area. You can get there by walking or catching a train, but everyone likes to use the shortcut that's warp piping to Flower Fields. However, due to some flowers withering, it's been sealed for now."
"Correct! Wow, you sure know your stuff."
"I do run this kingdom after all." Peach giggled.
Oh, why wasn't I born royally… A Hammer Bro thought to himself.
"Next question: Who is Ruby Rose's boyfriend? A: Pit. B: Waluigi. Or C: Link?"
"Waluigi!" The second Hammer Bro answered.
"Wrong!"
Peach smiled. "It's Pit."
"Correct!"
"Eh? Someone actually has a thing for the knuckleheaded angel? I thought he and Palutena had a thing." The Hammer Bro asked.
"Where were you during Uprising?" The first asked.
"Sleeping!"
"Oh, we just have room for one final question. Who is the boss of the Flower Fields? Is it A: Validar. B: Huff 'n Puff. Or C: Ganondorf?"
"Hufflepuff! Er, I mean, Huff 'n Puff!" The Hammer Bro quickly said.
"Correct! And we are out of time! Peach has the most points! She is the winner!"
End BGM
"Wahoo! Go Peach!" Tiki clapped as Twink cheered.
"And here's your prize! The Sneaky Parasol!" Koopatrol said, giving her the Sneaky Parasol.
"Oooh, I've heard about this!" Peach grinned. "Thanks!" She said… and then the doors slammed open.
"What the heck is going on in here!"
BGM: Bowser's Theme (Mario and Luigi: Dream Team)
"Oh, we just wrapped up our quiz show."
"Oh, you did? And you didn't invite me? I'm great at quizzes!" Bowser said. "…Another thing, why is SHE out here?"
"Can't a prisoner have some fun too?" Peach asked.
"She did win against a few of our men. She's pretty smart." The Koopatrol said.
"…Really, is that so?" Bowser asked and shoved Peach back into the booth.
"Ooof!"
"We'll see who's the smarter one! This blondie or yours truly!" Bowser said. "I'm the smartest Koopa there is, there's no way I'll lose to this lady!"
"…Oh, you're on." Peach said. "Give us your best shot!"
"…Right. Anyway, let's do another round!"
One obvious outcome later…
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!" Bowser yelled. "How could I lose against the princess?!"
"I may not overpower you physically, Bowser… but I can beat you mentally. I believe the saying is 'brains over brawn'."
"NO, IT'S THE OTHER WAY AROUND! GIVE ME ANOTHER ROUND!"
"…Okay then…"
Another obvious outcome later…
"GRRRR!"
"Try all you like Bowser. You're not going to win." Peach said as she walked away… but Bowser grabbed her.
"Oh no you don't! You're NOT leaving to your room until I beat you for once! HEY TORCHWICK!"
Roman walked in. "Yo."
"Come join us! Maybe together we'll beat Peach in this quiz!"
"Having trouble against her? I'll join you!"
Another outcome later…
"WHAAAAAAAAAT?!" Roman yelled.
Peach smirked. "Two is better than one? Yeah, no."
"Okay, you're obviously cheating!" Roman growled.
"No, I'm just smarter than the Koopa King and a criminal like you."
"…Give us another round! We're not leaving until we beat her!"
"YEAH!" Bowser yelled.
The Koopatrol sweatdropped. "Can I go home?"
"NO!"
"I was afraid of that."
Tiki sighed. "I'm afraid we're gonna be here for a while."
"Yup…" Tiki nodded.
End BGM
Away from the sore losers…
"Alright, we ready to go?" Mario asked as they were back on Wailord.
"Yup!" Kamui nodded.
"Let's go!" Ruby said.
"Let us cruise off!" Kolorado said.
"Waaaaaaail!" Wailord cried as they set off.
BGM: The Great Sea (The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker HD)
"Wahoo! This is awesome!" Elise grinned and as they disappeared… Jr. Troopa hopped up on the shore.
"Phew! I swam the entire way! NOW FACE ME, MAR-…I…o…" Jr. Troopa's eyes widened as he saw the gang cruising off on the Wailord. "Hey… HEY! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE!" He yelled as he dove back in the water and chased after them.
"Wake me up when we're there." Mario said as he turned around and rested on his back and slept, putting his cap over his eyes.
"I'm with ya there." Luigi said and joined him while everyone else kicked back and relaxed... while Affectio popped out of Luigi's hat and snuggled right next to Luigi, not that he didn't mind.
"…Aww, I didn't get any snacks." Effie complained while just behind them, Jr. Troopa panted and stopped to catch his breath.
"I… won't… give up… easily!"
"Shar…"
"Huh?" Jr. Troopa turned to see three shark fins swimming around him, and one of them poked its head out.
"Shar!"
"AIYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! SHARPEDO!" Jr. Troopa screamed and quickly bolted with the Sharpedo following him, as he bolted past Wailord.
"…Hmm?" Hana opened her eyes as she was meditating to see Jr. Troopa swim past them as the Sharpedo followed him. "…Eh." She shrugged and continued to meditate while Sakura and Elise looked into the water and saw some friendly Finneon and Luvdisc as they waved at them.
"Oh, Sakura! Look at that!" Elise pointed out in the distance as Sakura looked to see some Mantine swimming near them.
"Hmm?" Sakura looked ahead. "Elise!"
"Huh?" Elise turned her head to see a Kyogre breaching out of the water. "Ooooh! What's that?" She asked as the Kyogre disappeared into the water. "Aww… it's gone." She pouted.
Back at the Mushroom Kingdom…
Jr. Troopa hopped back onto the pier… but he was still running. "HELP! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! KILLER SHAAAARKS!" He screamed as he ran all the way back to his playground while the Sharpedo disappeared into the water.
"…I think he's been playing in the sun too much." A Toad said.
"Yup." Another Toad nodded as the Wailord pulled up to the docks.
End BGM
"Thank you!" Mario waved as the Wailord said nothing and then disappeared into the water.
"Hey you guys!" A voice called out to them to see Hinoka with Percy.
"Ma! Pa!" Percy waved as Effie and Arthur smiled and hugged their son.
"Aww!" Elise giggled… while Sakura hugged Hinoka tightly.
"Hey, miss me?" Hinoka asked with a smile.
"Hinoka… am I… useless?"
"Huh? Where'd that come from?" Hinoka asked.
"It's a long story." Hana said as Sakura explained what was said to her.
"…And I missed it all." She muttered. "If I was there, I'd twist that Piranha Plant's neck into several million knots before I killed it." She said. "Sakura, you're just as useful to everyone in our family and friends, and we're not lying. We love you no matter what!"
Sakura teared up. "Oh… Hinoka… thank you!" She sobbed and continued to hug her.
Hinoka chuckled. "Come on, I know something that'll cheer you up."
"Wh-what's that?"
Hinoka smiled. "Frozen yogurt! I discovered it in the middle of Toad Town! It's apparently run by a Shy Guy, come on!"
"Oh, I'd love some." Sakura smiled as they walked off.
"Hang on you guys, I'm coming too!" Elise said.
"I heard yogurt! I'm coming too!" Effie chased after them, with the other retainers, plus one child, going after them.
"Well, I guess we find the next Star Spirit." Mario said as they were all alone.
"Right." Kamui nodded as they walked off… and then they bumped into Twink.
"Oh, hey guys!" Twink said.
BGM: Twink's Theme (Paper Mario)
"Oh, come to tell us where the next Star Spirit is?" Blake asked.
"Yeah… and to get away from what's going on at the castle."
"Oh? What's going on over there?" Mario asked.
Pause BGM
At Peach's castle…
"The Lake Kingdom!" Bowser and Roman said.
"Nope…"
"The sparkly fizzy water is in the Seaside Kingdom." Peach said. "I should know, that's where my first date with Mario was."
"Correct!"
"OH, YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!"
"And Peach wins… for the 100th time… can I go home now?"
"NO!"
"…Kill me now…"
Peach sighed in boredom. "I'd rather be hanging out in my room right now." She said, watching Tiki take a comfortable nap. I envy you…
Back in Toad Town…
Resume BGM
"You don't want to know." Twink said. "Anyway, the next Star Spirit is in the Flower Fields."
"Oh, cool!" Luigi grinned.
"Have fun… I'm gonna see if they're finished yet." Twink said as he flew off.
End BGM
"So..." Ruby began. "How do we get to Flower Fields?"
"I know a shortcut, come on!" Mario said as they went to the Toad Town Square and found a flower garden as Mario jumped into the warp pipe… and was spat out. "WAAAH!" He yelled and landed on his back. "Ooof!"
"What the…?!" Luigi exclaimed in surprise.
"Ooooh, sorry guys." A female Toad gardener said. "That Warp Pipe is sealed off because unfortunately, we don't have enough Bub-ulb flowers blooming right at this moment, not to mention that some of them migrated to places for unknown reasons."
"What's a Bub-ulb?" Blake asked.
"And why do flowers have to activate a freakin' Warp Pipe?! That doesn't make sense!" Weiss complained.
"RPG logic." The gardener said.
"I know what they look like. Where are they?" Mario asked.
"One of them is somewhere in Toad Town, one of them went to Mt. Rugged, one of them went to Forever Forest and another went to Lavalava Island."
"…We were just THERE!" Yang yelled.
"I can go get them." Mario said. "You guys stick around here, I'll be back before you know it."
"You sure?" Kamui asked.
"Yes." Mario nodded as he took off.
"…Welp, we might as well look around Toad Town while we wait." Yang said.
"Yup." Everyone said in agreement as they wandered around Toad Town as Mario took off to find the Bub-ulbs.
Beware the nice ones. You never know when they'll snap at you.
Also, that awkward moment when you tell your friends you've got this covered and know what you're doing... and then you completely forget that getting to Flower Fields requires getting the four Bub-ulbs in order to get there.
Wah wah...
So anyway, the next chapter is basically getting the four Bub-ulbs! And perhaps a visit to the Master, perhaps? Hehehe...