ForHonor: right! Thank you! True Love by Pink is like the rockstar!brittana theme song to this fic.
X
''I just want you to know that this is the gayest thing I've ever done and that's really saying something because I've performed 'Come To My Window' live with Melissa Etheridge at a charity event.''
Santana and Brittany were standing at a kiosk, but not just any kiosk. This kiosk was the check in point for anyone who wanted to play a night time round of golf on a course that had been built on a clear patch of the festival field. The area was lit up with lines of twinkling lights, not to mention rows of tiki torches which added to the playful atmosphere. There were over two dozen holes, most of which looked overly elaborate and difficult as all hell.
''This isn't real golf, this is mini golf and mini golf is like standard date protocol,'' Brittany explained as she stepped up to hand some cash over to the man at the kiosk who handed them two brightly colored putters. ''Now do you want the green putter or the red one?''
''Red,'' Santana answered. ''I don't understand how you think we're going to pull this off with the handcuffs though.''
''It'll be tricky but it'll be worth it. I promise.''
Brittany led them along to the first round of holes which all appeared to be jungle themed. It took a few tries but eventually they made sense of it. Each time one of them would take a putt the other would just stand nearby and make their hand limp so the other could move their cuffed wrist a bit more freely. Brittany was kind of pleased to realize it didn't really hurt her skill level, with ease she began sinking ball after ball into hole after hole. She was a pretty boss mini golf player all in all. Santana on the other hand was far less coordinated, grunting with each putt that failed to land where she wanted it to, grumbling curse words under her breathe but continuing to play because if this is one of the things Brittany wanted them to do on their date, then she was going to at least try.
''I don't get it, aren't lesbians supposed to be awesome at this? This sucks and not in the positive life affirming way,'' she whined pathetically and whacked her putter against a nearby bush like a toddler.
Brittany watched in amusement. ''If you want to stop playing we can stop playing.''
''No way, I'm not going to let this game make me it's bottom bitch.'' With a flourish of her hand Santana dropped her ball onto the mat at the start of a new hole and then got in place to take her shot. She wiggled her shoulders a little and then with concentration pushed her putter forward to take her swing. The ball moved and bounced wildly, hitting the tiny partitions surrounding the hole several times until it sprung back and came to a halt at Santana's feet. ''Sonofa!''
''Okay, okay,'' Brittany interjected with a laugh and tapped the ball to move a few inches until it was back in place. ''Why don't we try it again? I think I know what your problem is.''
''What?''
''You need to loosen up. Look, I'll show you.''
Brittany then tossed her own putter aside and moved to stand behind Santana. Figuring out how to do that was a little complicated but after a couple of awkward maneuvers she realized if she lifted her cuffed hand over Santana's head she could actually comfortably place that arm across the front of Santana. She moved her free arm to Santana's front as well until they found their way down, sliding over Santana's fingers which still gripped her red putter. They were pretty much spooning while standing upright with Santana's back pressed against Brittany's front.
''First,'' Brittany said as she placed her chin on top of Santana's shoulder and spoke into her ear. ''You're way too stiff, you need to relax.''
Santana grinned when she felt Brittany's body against hers. ''I can do that.''
''Bend forward just a little bit.''
Santana did as told, letting her body relax, bending at the knee just slightly, inadvertently pushing her butt even further into Brittany's lap which in turn created a delicious sort of friction between them. Judging by the little moan she heard from Brittany behind her she wasn't the only one who was enjoying it.
''Jesus,'' Brittany said with a tremble in her voice.
''What?''
''Nothing, you're doing good.''
''What else should I do?''
''Um. Uh.'' Brittany went blank for a moment, overcome by the feeling of Santana's warm tight little ass quite literally backing up into her. ''You should uh, spread your legs a little wider too.''
''Spread my legs huh?'' Santana repeated devilishly. ''On a first date? I don't think I trust you with my virtue like that just yet."
"Stop being cute."
"Never. Okay now what?''
''Well I think you're hitting the ball with just a little too much force. You don't want to strike it, you want to tap it. Do it like this. Make one smooth motion.'' With Brittany's hands over Santana's she guided Santana to make several gentle clean practice putts, swinging against the empty air. With each putt, with each small movement she bumped her front lightly against Santana's rear. Back and forth, back and forth. Ass to lap, ass to lap.
''You know what? I've changed my mind, I think I love golf all of a sudden,'' Santana announced, very much enjoying Brittany's hands on golfing instruction. ''Dinah Shore Weekend here I come.''
''Okay are you ready to swing?''
''Are you going to help me?''
''I can if you want.''
Santana nodded. With Brittany's arms around her she was relaxed and comfortable and the game they were playing seemed somehow less ridiculous and more fun when they were cuddled up like this.
"So here's what we're going to do," Brittany said, her nose practically rubbing Santana's cheek. "We're going to aim at that spot in the corner there where the ball is going to bounce off that bumpy little thing over to the opposite side and hopefully place somewhere near the hole."
"Aim for the bumpy thing, got it."
With her hands on the putter and with Brittany's hands over hers Santana swung, making a mini arc into the air. She had tapped the ball with enough force to propel it forward but not quite enough to send it shooting all over the place. It bounced lightly into a corner where it hit the spot Brittany had told her to focus on, from there it glided further down the green felt until it neatly came to stop a foot from the hole in the ground.
Surprised and weirdly proud Santana took off towards it to make that one final tap that would sink it completely. Brittany was literally dragged along but she had a smile on her face, taking a sort of delight in simply watching Santana's delight.
"Oh my god, okay, I can do this," Santana said, more to herself than Brittany, as she took another gentle putt, barely hitting the ball which then fell into the hole with a cute little clunky sound. "Awww yeaaaah," Santana sang with swagger.
In triumph Santana threw her putter down and pointed her free hand up into the sky John Travolta-style and then began to do some silly hip pumpy move in place. She was basically humping the air like a dork.
"I should take this up professionally! Did you see me take that last shot?" Santana practically squealed.
"I did. Told ya you just needed to loosen up."
''I'm totally like Martina Navratilova up in here.''
''Martina Navratilova is tennis not golf.''
''Same difference.'' Santana tugged on the handcuffs, pulling Brittany to stand directly in front of her and giving her a grateful little grin. "Thanks for the pointers….and for humping my ass."
"Hey don't knock my teaching method," Brittany said with a sly shrug.
''I'm not, it really helped with my form.''
They carried on there, playing several more holes, joshing and teasing each other throughout each one. There shared a few more laughs as well as a few more playful ass grinding sessions. Santana actually found herself enjoying the game, or rather enjoying the fact that she was playing the game with Brittany.
''This has been fun,'' Santana said later on after they finished (and after Brittany had totally destroyed her ass...in golf that is) and were walking over to turn their putters back into the front kiosk. ''I don't usually get to do stuff like this on the road.''
''Really?'' asked Brittany. ''This is the kind of stuff The Dirty Pinks always do between gigs on the road. Last week Dani made us stop the tour bus because she saw a water park.''
''Yeah I'm not sure The Make could get away with making random pitstops like that in public places.''
''Why not?''
They started walking away from the kiosk and the course itself and passed a pair of festival goers one of which immediately whipped out his camera and snapped a picture of Santana, hitting her right in the face with the flash. Santana flinched and was so tempted to say something but didn't want to make a scene or make Brittany uncomfortable. The man who took the picture just continued on walking like nothing had just occurred and Santana figured it wasn't worth it anyway.
''That's why not,'' Santana answered, furrowing her brows in anger, not at Brittany but at the person who had just snapped a picture of her without her consent, like she was some animal in a zoo.
''Do you ever get tired of it? Fans running after you?'' Brittany asked, pulling at the cuffs so as to get Santana's attention on her and calm her down. ''Taking your pictures all the time?''
''Sometimes,'' Santana admitted as she tried to shake the incident off. ''I think it really depends on the fan though. Sometimes I can tell when I really mean something to them. They'll start shaking or crying or get all stuttery on me. But in those cases I don't even think it's really about me, it's about what I represent to them and that's a really complex thing.''
''Complex how?''
''It's like, you and I don't have normal nine-to-five jobs, we're in the public eye and we're on people's tvs and computers, we're in their ears and on their devices and what we do - music - becomes a part of them sometimes. We don't know what's going on in their lives, in their families. A three and a half minute song can sometimes save a life. People just need something or someone to connect to and in that way we - musicians - represent something bigger and greater than ourselves. When I see that in a fan's eyes I want to make sure they walk away with a memory that no one can ever take away from them. But then there are other kinds of fans…''
''Like the ones we had to run from earlier?''
''Yeah. The kind that can tear you apart. The kind who feel entitled to every second of your life.'' Santana kicked at a rock in her path. ''The kind who will take pictures of you in your doctor's office. The kind who will harass your parents over fucking Facebook. The kind who will post your home address online so you have to live in a hotel for a whole month until you can move. Those kind. It definitely gets tiring running away from those kind.''
Brittany blinked, stunned by the seriousness of what Santana had just said to her. ''People have really done that stuff to you?''
''I guess it comes with the life, right. Never knowing who you can trust, keeping your distance.''
Brittany looked over to her with sympathy in her eyes. ''That's sad.''
''It's a trade off though. It's just an ugly part of the job.''
''But music shouldn't be a job,'' Brittany insisted. ''I mean yeah it's our career but it shouldn't be this stifling kind of thing, ya know?''
''Totally. And it didn't used to feel like a job, it used to be a release and I still know it's the only thing I want to do with my life but...sometimes I don't feel the joy in it.''
Brittany didn't quite understand that but she still smiled. ''How can you even say that when you're at Coachella? I mean…'' she waved her free hand about as she motioned to the lights, the sights and the music all around. You couldn't walk ten feet without finding a tent or a barn or a campfire where someone was either playing music themselves or where one of the shows taking place live on one of the many stages was being transmitted via television monitors and speakers. ''Look at where you are.''
''Yeah,'' Santana with a mirthless chuckle.
Brittany frowned at that as she pulled them off to a row of booths where large displays of shirts, hats and various novelty items were set up and being sold. She swiped a pair shutter shades from a rack and slid them onto Santana's face.
Santana laughed at the Kanye-like shades. ''What are you doing?''
Brittany turned to another display of items and picked up a pink glow in the dark headband that when placed correctly onto one's head, gave the appearance of teeny-tiny cat ears. She promptly placed it into her own hair. ''I just saw somewhere I want to take you but to avoid you having to deal with rando fans, I figure we should go a little incognito.''
''This is your idea of incognito?''
''Yes,'' Brittany answered as she reached forward and flipped a tiny switch on Santana's glasses that somehow activated them and made them light up in bright neon green.
''I look like an idiot in these. How come you get the cool kitty ears?''
''We can switch if you want to but the kitty ears are not exactly going to hide your face.'' Brittany then went to inspect herself in a tiny mirror on the display. ''Besides I really wanted them because I love Josey & The Pussycats.''
''Fine, but I'm only giving in because you look cute.'' Santana went to tweak one of Brittany's kitty ears. ''Now where exactly are we going?''
''How do you feel about bubble baths?''
X
Quinn and Tina sat in silence as they digested what Sam had just confided to them.
It was a weirdly heavy conversation to be having in front of ski ball lanes and it was somewhat peculiar that someone they barely knew was telling them all of their dirty little band secrets but it made sense in a way.
The Dirty Pinks were a sisterhood, the four of them, but The Make was simply a duo and Santana and Sam only had each other and when there was conflict it wasn't as if they had another member of the band to lean on or get advice from or even seek some kind of comfort with and it sounded like things had been eating at Sam a lot lately. So much to the point that he had basically word vomited all over them about what was going on.
He had told them everything. He had told them how he and Santana had started out with the best of intentions but then became preoccupied with so many other things, like their image overhaul the label had pushed on them. He had told them about their rise in popularity and how he had developed some jealousy along the way as Santana's public profile rose and as he was consistently shuffled to the side more and more in the media. He had also explained how he had let those feelings fester and dwell inside of him instead of trying to address those issues with her head on in an adult way. How he had started to feel a shift in their friendship because of all of that and how in turn Santana just stopped leaning on him as a bandmate and as a friend. And finally, he told them how when left to her own devices Santana had begun to act out in some unflattering ways, one of which had cost them them what could've been their most high profile public performance of their careers.
The truth was, Sam confessed, that in most cases the tabloids usually got so much wrong but in this case of The Make everything they had heard or read online was true. They very well could fall apart if he and Santana couldn't find a way to get it together.
It wasn't that The Make was breaking up, it was that The Make was simply dissolving right in front of their eyes and he didn't know how to save it.
''That's a bummer,'' Tina started after hearing his side of it all.
''I wouldn't even know what I would do if someone cost me the gig of a lifetime like that,'' Quinn sighed. ''But honestly, I kind of feel sad for Santana.''
''Sad for Santana?'' Sam asked, but it wasn't out of anger. He was just curious how Santana sleeping with the wrong woman and costing them millions of dollars and a once in a lifetime gig with music icons made her the sympathetic one. ''She's the one who screwed us out of that deal.''
''True,'' Quinn stated calmly as she gathered her game tickets from their ski ball sessions and started walking them off to the prize booth down the pathway. ''But from everything you just told us you'd been giving her shit because she was more popular and that's when she started pulling away from you, and when she started pulling away is when she started acting out more. Right?''
''More or less,'' Sam answered honestly.
''I'm not saying any of that was your fault,'' Quinn continued, ''but maybe she was going through a rough time and didn't feel like you had her back. Maybe the drinking and sleeping around was her really twisted way of coping with not having your friendship anymore.''
''But she'll always have my friendship,'' Sam insisted whole heartedly. ''I mean, yes I've said some things I didn't mean and thrown a couple of tantrums on the road but...she's never not had my friendship.''
Tina raised a shoulder. ''You might've known that, maybe she didn't though. Maybe she felt like she was losing her friend and had nothing left, and with nothing left there was nothing there stopping her from acting like a dumbass.''
Sam blinked long and hard as he took their words to heart and really considered them.
Maybe all of his whining and bitching about not being seen, not being wanted by the media, not being constantly fawned over in the public eye had made Santana weary. There was that possibility that her behavior and its erratic escalation had something to do with his open frustration with the media's infatuation with her as the front woman. If he had made it so unbearable for her to be around him, if she knew that's all she was going to hear from him maybe that was why he felt her pulling away and withdrawing into herself. She could have felt like being around him would only disappoint him or turn him bitter, of course she wouldn't want to be near that. If he constantly made her feel like she was twisting a knife in his back, Santana was definitely the kind of person who would put distance between them, not just to spare her own self, but to spare him the frustration. She would take on the role of the burden, even if she wasn't one.
Deep down in reality Sam knew she would never do anything to hurt them or the band intentionally but he had let his ego get the best of him and it came out in stupid, petty, selfish ways on his part. Sam had unintentionally made her feel alone.
But the thing that hurt him the most though was the idea that he could ever make Santana feel like he wasn't there for her. The fact that he had ever allowed it to get to that point where she could think that of their friendship made him want to kick himself. If she felt like she had nothing and no one then of course she would turn away to find something, some comfort, some solace, whether that was drinking or women or whatever.
If she was going through something, whatever it was, he would always be there no matter what. Bullshit image games aside, if push came to shove his choice would always be their friendship and their band over everything else. How he had let himself become so consumed and blinded by the lights and cameras and media was beyond him. To let those stupid petty things get in the way of their partnership and this thing they had built together since they were teenagers, he felt like an idiot.
All of it came tumbling down on Sam as he realized how foolish he had been to put all of that before the music, before his band, before the longest and most important friendship in his life.
Santana did screw them out of a pretty huge gig, but now all of a sudden with things in a new perspective it didn't seem so big that they couldn't work through that together. It didn't really seem to matter as much.
He had a long walk to think it out and by the time he, Tina and Quinn arrived at the prize booth with their tickets a shift had taken place inside of him. At the start of the day he wasn't sure if The Make were, well, going to make it. But now that he realized Santana's actions might have been brought on by pressures from him and the constant flashing lights of the media, he had a quiet determination for them to get things back on track. Now where he knew they went wrong maybe there was a way for The Make to turn it around.
''Let's pool all of our tickets together,'' Tina said, gathering their stubs into her hands and handing them over to the girl at the booth to be counted. Once she tallied them up she motioned to several rows of prizes they could choose from.
''Oh my god I know what we're getting,'' Quinn announced with a wicked kind of glee and then leaned across the counter to whisper into the ticket girl's ear.
The girl nodded and then turned around to fetch the item Quinn requested of her while Sam and Tina stood in wait curiously. When the girl came back to them she was carrying a cheesy wooden plaque that had a fake trout mounted onto it. Bursting with laughter Tina took it and pressed the button, making the trout come alive, it flopped around and with a thick southern accent began to sing Don't Worry Be Happy.
''Here, since we get the feeling you're going through a hard time consider this our gift to you,'' Tina said and then handed the stupid singing fish over to Sam.
''What the hell,'' he laughed.
''To cheer you up,'' Tina said as explanation. ''But now that I'm looking at it, it does sort of vaguely look like you too. Same guppy lips.''
Sam looked pretty touched by the gesture and accepted the novelty item. ''Thank you.''
''Yeah,'' Quinn chuckled and patted his shoulder. ''Now even if Santana's not around you'll always have a friend on the tour bus.''
Tina playfully bumped into his other shoulder with a friendly kind of affection. ''And to remind you that even though The Make and The Dirty Pinks are from different genres...you got at least a couple of friends in us. We might not be Santana but we know what it's like on the road.''
''And the pressures that came with being in a band. You could always hit us up if you ever need to get something off your chest.''
''That,'' Tina said. ''Or maybe you can finally get around to getting some of the things off of your chest to Santana.''
''Yeah, yeah you're right,'' Sam said with resolution to do just that, to fix what had been broken, to find what had been lost, to make The Make whole again. ''I will. I'll talk to her. Really talk to her. And thank you guys. For keeping me company and letting me hang even though we don't really know each other. I appreciate that. Watching The Dirty Pinks together...it's really just made me miss what Santana and I used to have together before it started being about money and the spotlight.''
Tina and Quinn looked pleased with that and smiled at him in return.
''What do you say the three of us go back to The Make's tour bus and get this thing mounted huh?'' Sam asked as he proudly held up his new fishy toy.
''Bribe us with a couple more slushies and I think we can be convinced,'' said Quinn.
''We can do more slushies or if you guys want our tour bus has a full bar, we can do margaritas,'' Sam offered.
''I like how you think.''
''Hey,'' Tina chimed. ''Since you said you guys have an awesome entertainment system do you think we could maybe watch a movie?''
''Of course,'' Sam agreed happily. ''Have anything in mind?''
''Only the greatest movie musical of all time,'' Tina replied without hesitation.
''Moulin Rouge?''
''Grease?''
''West Side Story?''
Tina scoffed. ''Ummmm no. I'm talking about Spice World obviously, which is probably the greatest piece of cinema to ever exist.''
''Hey I'm game for whatever,'' Sam declared, eager to simply spend time with his two new friends. ''Just follow me.''
They all started off with Sam leading the way. It was a good forty minute trek through the grounds until they reached the gated back lot used for band and artist tour buses. They walked past rows and rows of them until they came across a tall black double decker one. It was by far one of the most expensive ones on the lot. The Make was definitely riding around in style.
Sam tucked his fishy toy under his arm, pulled out a set of keys and went to approach the side door and began to struggle to open the thing. ''We gave our driver the evening off so he's probably enjoying the festival so it'll just be us,'' he explained as he put the key in the hole and finally got it open.
He flicked on a couple of switches and illuminated the space. The Make's tour bus was indeed pimped out with sleek couches lining the sides, a huge and impressive entertainment center, a small bar tucked in the corner and a very short set of stairs that led to the upper level.
''For the record I hate you,'' Tina said to Sam with envy.
''Sweet right?'' Sam asked. ''Come on, I'll show y'all upstairs. It's where we have our bunks but we also have this awesome remote controlled skylight.''
Again he started to guide them but Sam wasn't able to continue on with his little tour of the place when they climbed the stairs and he flicked on the upper level lights to reveal two very naked bodies moving together.
Dani and Lake were enjoying themselves in Sam's bunk it seemed. Completely naked except for a single sheet. They let out surprised screams when they realized they were caught and Tina, Sam and Quinn yelped and averted their eyes.
''OH MY GOD MY VISION!'' Tina hollered, immediately holding a hand out to block the sight of her bandmate and the model tangled up with each other.
''What the hell?'' Quinn asked, her face frozen with amusement more than horror.
''My bunk,'' Sam whimpered like a sad child.
''This isn't what it looks like!'' Dani announced and pulled a pillow in front of her body as well as one in front of Lake's.
''It looks like you were face down in Santana's girlfriend,'' Tina said.
''Okay, so it's totally what it looks like,'' Dani admitted with a chuckle. ''Also side note Sam, why are you holding a fish?''
Sam motioned to Tina and Quinn. ''They won it for me on ski ball.''
''You guys played ski ball without telling me?!'' Dani was downright hurt as well as offended.
''Uh hello you ran off and decided to sleep with some model without telling us,'' Quinn defended them through laughter.
''Just to clarify, I'm not just some model, I'm a Victoria's Secret model,'' Lake stated very proudly.
Tina held up her finger as if asking for a turn to speak. ''Dani, I love you but you do know there's like an 80% chance Santana might kick your ass for this, right?''
''What, no,'' Dani said, hurrying to explain to the others. ''Lake and I...it's totally fine!''
Lake continued on from there, waving her hands about her sides. ''No one's going to be kicking anyone's ass because...because...because…'' she turned to Dani and after receiving a small but encouraging nod for her to go on she decided it was best to just be honest. ''Santana and I aren't real, I'm single, she's single. The relationship is for the cameras. So this…'' she then made a gesture at the bed she and Dani were in. ''isn't cheating. Trust me Santana won't even blink at it. Dani and I hit it off back at that rave and got to talking then one thing led to another and well…we just sort of happened.''
Sam was slightly squicked that things had very obviously taken place in his bunk but he shrugged it off for the most part. ''So, wait, if you two hooked up at the barn and then came back here, where's Brittany's boyfriend?''
''That we don't know,'' Dani answered. ''Me and Lake weren't really paying attention.''
''And the last place I saw Brittany and Santana, they were literally on their hands and knees on dance floor,'' said Lake. ''Brittany lost her lucky pick and that boyfriend of hers was being all uptight and refused to help her go look for it. Santana did though.''
Tina, Quinn and Sam were slowly and quietly digesting all of this.
''So uh, do you think you can let us get dressed now?'' Dani cleared her throat, shooting them all a 'get the hell out of here' look.
Without a word Quinn, Sam and Tina sheepishly shuffled back downstairs, giggling as they went.
Dani and Lake were left sitting there in bed with nothing but a couple of pillows and a sheet over them. They both exhaled with exaggeration now that they were alone again but they had to smile at the situation, absurd as it was.
''I guess we should get dressed huh?'' Dani chuckled. Her bandmates and Sam had really put a damper on the moment for them.
''I guess,'' said Lake as she slid out of the bed and went to the pile of clothes on the ground.
''So, not to put any pressure on this moment or anything, but what exactly does this mean,'' Dani asked as she went to the edge of the thin mattress, found her jeans and began to slip them on. ''You and me?''
Lake took a moment to consider all of this. ''I'm not sure. I know that I like you a lot though and I know I'd like it if we could get to know each other more.''
''I'd totally be down for that,'' Dani said with eagerness. ''In fact I'd be way more than down with that. But what about you and Santana? I mean I know you two aren't together but are you still going to pretend you are or...'' she let the question hang in the air.
''You mean are you going to have to be some secret I keep?''
Dani nodded.
Lake went to join Dani and took a seat next to her, handing the guitarist her top which Dani then slid into. ''I'm not sure. I guess that's something that I'll have to figure out with Santana.''
''But maybe this is a good thing?'' Dani wondered aloud. ''I mean if you want to see where this goes and I want to see where this goes and if it turns out that there's something here between us that means you can stop and neither of you will have to pretend anymore. Right?''
''I don't know if it can be that simple.''
''I think life can be as simple or as complicated as one wants to make it,'' Dani said gently. ''I get why you guys felt pressured to do the PR thing but you shouldn't let public opinion rule your life, especially if it gets in the way of happiness. Like. To quote a great philosopher : people talking since the beginning of time, unless they paying yo' bills, pay them bitches no mind.''
''Who said that?''
''Rupaul.''
Lake cracked up. ''Wow.''
''It's true though,'' Dani laughed with her. ''People will always talk, so let them talk. All the nasty trolls and celebrity bloggers and Perez Hiltons of the world. They're not paying your bills, they're not in charge of you, they have no control, they're just sad people who like to tear others down. The best revenge and the only way to win is to love yourself more than they could ever possibly hate you.''
Lake smiled at the sentiment, receiving the words and the encouragement behind them.
X
''Are you serious?'' Santana asked as she and Brittany stood at the entrance of a newly built metal shed where a themed party was being hosted.
It wasn't just any party either, it was a foam party. The entire space was filled waist-high with sudsy foam and bubbles as festival goers danced wildly within it. Beach balls were also being thrown around all over the place, every other person was wearing completely unnecessary but completely hilarious floaties for some reason, and a DJ was centered at a stage near the rear where he seemed to be blasting nothing but cheesy 80's music.
Even though it was the middle of the night, Coachella never seemed to sleep. There was always some gathering, some party just around the corner and Brittany had just dragged Santana into this one. A room full of bubbles.
''Hey,'' Brittany started with a laugh. ''You told me you liked bubble baths.''
''Wuh yeah, that's because I thought you wanted you and I to have a little one on one fun in the tub, but this…'' Santana smiled but she looked unsure. ''This is silly.''
''Exactly,'' Brittany urged.
Santana considered that and then adjusted her novelty light up glasses and began walking them forward until they were quite literally surrounded by foam and practically swimming in it. Within seconds of trying to dance Santana went down, completely disappearing from sight as she slipped and fell into the suds, almost but not quite taking Brittany down with her. She comically bounced right back up though. This time however she had a dollop of foam on top of her head which Brittany scooped up with her free hand and then blew into the air between them all while Madonna pumped through the sound system.
Music can be such a revelation
Dancing around you feel the sweet sensation
We might be lovers if the rhythm's right
I hope this feeling never ends tonight
Only when I'm dancing can I feel this free
At night I lock the doors, where no one else can see
I'm tired of dancing here all by myself
Tonight I want to dance with someone else
''I love this song!'' Santana shouted over the music.
''Me too!'' Brittany shouted back. ''The 80's had the best fashion.''
''And hair!''
They moved all over the floor, dancing, sliding and gliding through the crowds, throwing foam at each other and at other dancers. Santana took a certain kind of delight in getting to be silly and stupid without fear that anyone would see and recognize her. Not with the funny glasses which several other people were sporting as well. She could just have fun and be another face in the crowd. No one was poking or prodding at her.
It was just her and Brittany twisting and turning in foam without a care in the world. The only thing that mattered in that moment was the music beat and the blonde in her arms.
It felt easy and natural between them and Santana had begun to think if this was what dates felt like maybe she should try to go on one again, or then again maybe it was just because this specific date was with Brittany that made it so interesting and different. Because Brittany was different from everyone else she had ever met. Brittany kept her on her toes. She also had never once seemed impressed by Santana's status, Brittany didn't blush and giggle and give herself up to Santana so easily. Not like the groupies or the fangirls Santana encountered. Sure Brittany was a bit of a tease but in a funny roundabout way that's one of the things Santana really liked about her. Fans and groupies were always so easy to fall into Santana's bed but none of them had ever thought to tease her. No one had thought to ever wait, to connect, to build anticipation like this. The fact that Brittany wasn't giving it up in turn was the sexiest, most stimulating thing any girl had ever done with Santana.
Brittany had somehow made something as ridiculous and silly as mini golf seem fun and entertaining because the point of the exercise wasn't about how to get in bed with each other, the point of it was to get to know each other on another level. And the truth was Santana had never gotten to be this version of herself, the real version, with any of those other girls. She'd never gotten to be silly or goofy or laid back or relaxed.
Brittany had told her she needed to relax to get comfortable with the golf game but it was more than that. Santana had just been needing to relax, period, and she could do that with Brittany because with Brittany she didn't have to be ON. She didn't have to play that part, the sexy withholding apathetic rockstar. She could just breathe easy and have a laugh and eat snow cones and play mini golf and do stupid John Travolta fingers and slide around in a room full of foam while wearing stupid novelty glasses.
Brittany let her be Santana Lopez the person again and it was so very freeing.
She felt like she could dance with Brittany forever as they moved together, bopping along to the oldies. Twirling and bouncing around to George Michael and Blondie and Depeche Mode, Modern English, Eurythmics and Culture Club. Brittany sang the entirety of Kim Carnes' Bette Davis Eyes to Santana(''...and she'll tease you, she'll unease you, all the better just to please you..''). Later on the entire room lost their shit when Walk Like An Egyption from the Bangles started, with everyone mimicking the whistle in the song.
Then the spirited atmosphere took a calm, quieter turn as the DJ switched things up a little and began playing slower music and suddenly everyone was pairing up together like it was a slow dance at a high school prom. The bass line of U2's With or Without You started over the speakers and Santana found her hands resting on Brittany's hips, gently guiding her movements with her own, moving them together in slow degrees as the music washed over them and as Brittany's arms came to wrap around her neck.
Brittany smiled softly and leaned in to speak. ''I could never figure out if this was a love song or not.''
''I think it is, it's just not your average love song. It's the tortured kind,'' Santana said.
''Yeah?''
Santana peeled off her shades and hooked them on her shirt, growing tired of having them in the way and wanting to now see Brittany fully. ''Yeah. Bono wrote it about the struggle between domesticity and rock stardom. He was married but there was still the tiniest wonder about what it would be like to be free to do whatever he pleased. It's about loving someone with all you are and having the world at your feet.''
''And giving into temptation?''
''Facing temptation but walking away from it. He chose his wife and their life together over all of the temptations that come with being a rock star. And when he says 'and you give yourself away' he's really talking about himself.''
''With other women?''
''No with the media, with fans. He's also said that on another level the song is about his relationship with his fans. The whole I can't live with or without you part. You need your fans but at the same time...sometimes you just need them to go away for a little while and let you be. Bono knew he could sometimes be too open with who he was in interviews or on stage and how the other members of the band felt that he was letting himself be too vulnerable, giving too much of himself away. Giving too much of ourselves away when we do what we do isn't always a good thing because then we have nothing left of ourselves just for ourselves.''
Brittany ran a hand over dark hair. ''Is that what the song means to you?''
'' 'Nothing to win and nothing left to lose' '' she quoted the lyrics slowly, breathing against Brittany. ''I don't know what it means to me. I guess sometimes as much as I love my fans I could live without the constant pressure that comes with them.''
Brittany nodded as they kept slow dancing. ''What about the other part of it?''
''What part?''
''Could you give up all of the rock star temptations if you had something else...someone else? Could you give all of that up for the right girl?''
''For the right girl...'' Santana hummed. ''For the right girl I would do a lot of things.''
''Like?''
''Like, for the right girl I wouldn't stay out late, and for the right girl I'd probably drink a little less.''
''Yeah?''
''Mmhm, for the right girl I wouldn't waste my time with groupies either.''
''Oh no?'' Brittany asked playfully.
''Not one.'' Santana pulled back and squinted as if she were thinking very hard on this matter. ''Mostly because the right girl and I, we'd probably have the best, hottest, most passionate sex on the planet. After that groupies would probably be a let down.''
''Would they now?''
''Totally. I mean I'm assuming the right girl would be incredibly flexible, so.'' they laughed together and then Santana shook her head, getting back to the matter. ''But even if the road and schedules got in the way and we couldn't be together for a while, for the right girl I'd wait. I'd wait for the right girl. I'd call her where ever she was, where ever I was.''
''And that would be enough for you?''
''I would make it be enough for me. For the right girl. And hey, if I have to bitch at my label to get me a private jet to go see her or for her to come see me, then I would. Even if I could only see her for a few hours, I'd make those hours count. And I'd promise her one day soon she'd get more of me, all of me. I'd do anything for the right girl.''
Brittany smiled at Santana's adorable sincerity. For someone who was often portrayed as some careless self obsessed celebrity in the magazines Santana could be ridiculously sweet. So hopeful and desperate for a real kind of connection.
''You ready to get out of here?'' Brittany asked. ''I'm getting kind of wet.''
At the dirty implication Santana raised a very intrigued eyebrow. ''Wet huh?''
''From the foam,'' Brittany said, pinching Santana in the side. ''We've been dancing in it so long, my clothes are all damp.''
''Yeah, yeah, I think I've had enough fun in bubbles for tonight.''
Santana led the way, parting foam as best she could so they could make their exit. Once back out into the open air they walked along, trying to dry off. They weren't soaking wet but their clothes were slightly moist from dancing in the stuff for a good hour. Waiting for the bottom half of their outfits to dry they decided to split a serving of cotton candy and lounge around on a nearby picnic table. They didn't even bother with the seats, instead they chose to simply climb and sit on the wooden table tap.
They took the time to also pull out their phones. It was then they realized they both had missed calls from their respective bandmates but instead of calling back they each sent out a text, Brittany to Quinn and Santana to Sam, simply telling them they were fine and safe but conveniently kept mum on everything else that had been going on between them. They didn't give too much of what was happening away just yet.
And then somehow one way or another, after they had both finished off their cotton candy snack they started playing with each other's phones as they laid back, flat on the table. They had both agreed that in order to really begin to know and understand one another, they had to look at each other's playlists. It was the only way, Brittany insisted and with no hesitation they had traded phones for the other to inspect.
''Metric, nice, Lorde, nice, The Kills, nice, Adam Lambert, hells yeah, the best of Britney Spears, yes, but you lost me at Avril Lavigne,'' said Brittany who was stunned at this last discovery.
''You make it sound like I own her entire discography,'' Santana said in her own defense. ''I own one song of hers and I'm sorry but I'm With You is a totally unappreciated ballad though I will admit had it been sung by the likes of Kelly Clarkson or even Carrie Underwood, it would've been a much stronger more appealing song. And I don't know why you're talking you have a Justin Beiber song on your phone!''
''No!'' Brittany shouted and laughed. ''Correction! I don't own a Justin Beiber song. I own a DJ Snake song featuring Justin Bieber. Big difference! And Let Me Love You is my workout jam, so don't even.''
''Whatever you have to tell yourself to sleep at night.''
Brittany grinned and yet threw a defiant hand up as if she wasn't going to entertain any more of that. Santana grinned and went back to scrolling through Brittany's music when she saw something that made her laugh out loud.
''Oh my god.''
''What?'' Brittany asked.
''You.''
''What?''
''When we first met you acted like you hated The Make's music,'' Santana said, smiling in triumph. ''But this entire time you've totally been lying because you own You Instead! You own my song!''
Brittany tried to play it aloof. ''Only because I like the drum machine beat.''
''Uh huh.''
''And the synths.''
''Sure.''
''And the verses are kind of catchy.''
''Right.''
''Shut up.''
''Admit it, you're a fan,'' Santana hollered, tickled that despite all of Brittany's talk, The Dirty Pinks frontwoman totally jammed out to her music. ''Ms. I-make-real-music-unlike-your-glossy-overproduced-overplayed-songs owns my most popular single!''
''Okay, so what. It's fun and kind of hot and your voice is dreamy. Let's not make a huge thing of it. By the way I found your Sex playlist just so you know.''
''Oh? And?''
''Not bad. Not bad at all. Boys Wanna Be Her by Peaches. National Anthem from Lana Del Rey of course. #1 Crush by Garbage, because obviously. And pretty much every song recorded by Rihanna. Hmm.''
''Why the hmm? What? You don't like those?''
''No, I love those songs. Shirley Manson's vocals totally drip sex and who doesn't love Rihanna and Lana but...are those the songs that really scream romance to you?''
''No, but sex and romance are two different things to me. Sexy songs don't always mean romantic songs and vice versa. Romance is a whole different song list for me.''
''You know what I think I'd really be interested in hearing what you think romance sounds like.''
''You don't think I can do romance?''
''I didn't say that, I just have the feeling that your idea of romance is something else.''
Santana turned on her side and studied Brittany's profile. ''I guess I'll have to make you a playlist then.''
''Good.''
''This is the first time I've ever done anything like this with a girl.''
''What?''
''Talk this way, about music. Usually the girls I sleep with...they're not really interested in hearing me talk like this and certainly not for this long. Then again, it's not like a lot of talking goes on between me and them. This feels...nice.''
''Can I ask you a serious question?'' Brittany then turned herself over too so they were facing each other, side by side.
''Ask me anything.''
''I know you don't date or have relationships but...Have you ever been in love?''
''Honestly?''
''Honestly.''
Santana nodded. ''Yeah I have. Hundreds of times...thousands of times probably.''
''Oh.'' It wasn't exactly what Brittany was expecting to hear.
''...but never with any person though.''
''What do you mean?''
''I've fallen in love more times than I can count. When I was ten and I heard The Cure's Just Like Heaven on the radio for the first time, I fell in love the moment those synths came in. And when I was fourteen and heard Cyndi Lauper's Time After Time on some movie soundtrack, I fell in love. I fell in love like yesterday when I heard the new single from Marina and The Diamonds. I've fallen in love plenty.''
''With songs?''
''Yeah, with songs. Who says you can't fall in love with songs?''
''Nobody, I just never heard anybody put it like that.''
''It's strange in a way, I've never really felt strongly enough for a person to give my heart away but sometimes when I hear a new song, it's all I want to do. Give my heart away to it. People...people leave...people disappoint. That's just life, right. But songs? They stay with you, they'll always be there when you need them no matter what. I've fallen in love with songs and albums for as long as I can remember but when it comes to people...I don't know. There's a certain thrill or rush or whatever when you find a song so perfectly crafted that somehow speaks something to you so clearly and articulately, there's nothing like it. I've never felt those kinds of feelings for a person though. I mean until…''
''Until what?''
''Until you.''
''You know they say that the same endorphins that get released when you're working out are the same ones you get when you're listening to one of your favorite songs.''
Santana made a soft thoughtful noise at that fact.
''And the same ones you feel when you're in love,'' Brittany added.
''Are they now?''
''Mmhm.''
Santana moved forward the tiniest bit so her nose bumped and nuzzled against Brittany's. It was a silent request. She was ready for more, she wanted more, but only if Brittany did. Santana swallowed and blinked, her body vibrating in a way it never had before. Because no other kiss before this had meant anything more. The air felt heavy and thick between them by the time Brittany gave her a single nod in reply, nonverbally telling Santana she was ready, that she wanted the same thing too.
And when Santana finally closed the distance and pressed her lips against Brittany's, that's exactly what it felt like, like listening to her favorite song. Except no, it wasn't just like listening to her favorite song, it felt like she was listening to all of her favorite songs at the same time. One after another, again and again, her heart thumping and beating and being brought back to life. Brittany moaned and whimpered against her as she opened her mouth to Santana's tongue, welcoming it in to meet her own.
But as warm and intense as it was, nothing about this kiss was rushed or sloppy. Because for Santana this wasn't like every other meaningless encounter. This was the first girl who made her feel alive, the way music could, the way music used to.
''You're shaking…'' Brittany whispered when after several minutes they pulled away to catch their breath.
''I'm sorry,'' Santana whispered back. She didn't know what else to say because she'd never felt this excited or nervous before.
''No, don't be.'' Brittany assured her, her free hand reaching out to stroke Santana's neck tenderly. ''It's...sweet. I never thought you would be like this.''
''Like what?''
''Soft,'' Brittany answered. ''I like it.''
And with a new eagerness Santana went back in for more, kissing a little more deeply, a little more hotly, a little greedily as if she wanted every bit of Brittany that Brittany was willing to give. She loved the way Brittany tasted, sounded and pushed herself against her as she felt long legs sliding against her own lazily. It was a slow teasing game, challenging each other to meet the other's intensity and energy and it was escalating quickly as their hands started to roam over the other's bodies, squeezing and pulling at each other with desire. Needing more of everything.
Above them, fireworks went off from somewhere else within the festival, sprinkling the entire night sky with bursts of light, but it wasn't enough to make Santana stop or even pull away from this kiss she was so fully intent on savoring for as long as possible.
''Should we be doing this here?'' Brittany panted after awhile as Santana went down to trail kisses along her pale neck, licking and sucking at the tiny freckles she found along the way.
Santana's only reply was to make a happy muffled sound against Brittany's skin.
She did have a point though, they weren't exactly being discreet. There were dozens and dozens of people walking around the area but thankfully no one had recognized either of them, still it probably wasn't the best idea to start this out in the open and risk any kind of exposure. Brittany didn't have anything on the line but Santana did.
Brittany pulled Santana's face out of her neck and laid a dominant kiss on her, getting her attention and letting her know she meant business. ''We should probably go somewhere...somewhere more private.''
Santana audibly gulped. ''Private? Really?''
''Yeah. I mean I don't mind this at all,'' Brittany said with fireworks reflecting in her eyes. ''But if we keep going at it here people might start paying attention.''
Santana gave her one final peck before trying to figure out where they could go to be together. ''If you want private we could go to my tour bus, or the trailer?''
''Yeah but how long is it gonna take for us to get there?''
''Awhile but that's ok, I wouldn't mind the walk. I wouldn't mind waiting either if that's what you wanted.''
''Maybe I don't want to wait though.'' Brittany stroked Santana's inner thigh.
''Then where exactly do you want this to happen?''
Brittany bit her lip and began to look around at their surroundings, at the booths and kiosks, at the tents and bonfires. She paused though she in the distance she spotted several crowds congregating together as the people stood about, waiting in line for several different carnival rides. There was a carousel, a pendulum ride, spinning cups, bumper cars, but above all of them towered a huge ferris wheel which was slowly moving.
''I think I have a solution,'' Brittany said as a dirty idea danced in her head. ''You're not afraid of heights are you?''
X
A/N: so story time! Now, physically speaking I am more of a Santana, in that I'm Mexican-American, part puppy/part asshole, and when I walk into rooms I just automatically assume everyone totally wants up on this, cause obviously. But in all honesty I have been in Sam's position here. Ages ago I was in a band that had two guitarists, me and a Sam lookalike believe it or not. He looked like Season 2 Sam which was weird. And objectively speaking I really was a better musician than him, hands down. Skill wise I was more advanced. But, he was a guy and I was a girl and I don't think I got enough respect or consideration than he did and he was definitely handed things I don't think he deserved. He wasn't a horrible dude or anything, he was just a less skilled guitarist than I was. I seriously did a lot of silent fuming over that stuff because I didn't feel appreciated and I didn't feel like I was taken seriously. I stuck it out for awhile with that band but one day I had enough and walked away and I had someone just go to the rehearsal space and get my gear for me because I was so done I didn't even want to go in and do it myself.
So yeah, physically I'm a Santana but I do actually get where this Sam is coming from to some degree because I've been in his shoes although I never ever took it out on the person who was getting the attention. That said I really hope Sam isn't reading as a bad guy here because that's not my intention. This is something that happens sometimes in bands and he's just conflicted and confused but I think Santana and The Make will always mean more to him than any of that stuff.
Also, if any of you imaginary readers out there have read my fic 'it was love to me' you'll notice that I borrowed a scene from myself, which is the mini golf scene between Santana and Brittany. It isn't word for word but the scenes are reminiscent of each other in that both find brittana playing a silly game of mini golf together. Also ass humping.
Also I feel like I should apologize again if the music talk gets boring or tedious to read. Sometimes I feel I get carried away because of my own deep appreciation for music that encompasses so many genres, styles and decades. But I also think so much of it is integral to the story because for this Brittany and this Santana, music is their entire way of life. I feel like these versions of them would know these things and say these things.
Thank you all for reading/favoriting/reviewing. I so appreciate every single one of you who leaves me a line of encouragement or thoughts on the story.