A/N: Basically I'm sick at the moment, so I can't be at work and suddenly I have an awful lot of inspiration for this story. So... two chapters in as many days? Try not to get attached to it, I guess. But seriously, thank you guys so much for reading and sticking with me! The first part of this chapter is much longer than the second: Nate and Jenny finally confront one another about their feelings... but it doesn't quite work out the way one of them expects.

I'll leave you with that. Onward! x

I Love You Doesn't Mean I Won't Hurt You

Nate couldn't sleep. As much as he tried, he couldn't ignore the fact that Jenny Humphrey was staying in a room down the hall. Chuck had suggested they both lay low for a day or two, before going their separate ways for a little while. Nate had no intention of leaving her on such poor terms, however. There were conversations that had to happen, things that needed to be said between the two of them, and apologies to make to one another.

Nate ground his teeth every time he thought about it.

The diamond ring on her finger.

The one she hadn't taken off, despite Baizen's cruel betrayal.

He rolled onto his other side, staring at the closed door to his room. Would she really consider staying with that low-life? Was their connection so strong that she would be able to forgive such an appalling invasion of privacy, such a cold-hearted act that threatened to destroy everything Jenny had worked so hard for? Did she really love Carter so much that they could survive that?

The very idea made Nate's stomach turn in knots. He had to see her.

He slipped quietly out of bed, catching sight of the clock on the bedside table. It was ten after twelve; he hoped Jenny was still awake. He couldn't wait to see her the next day. There were so many thoughts swirling in his head, so many things he wanted to tell her and so many things he needed to hear from her… he desperately needed her to tell him that she didn't forgive Carter; that she didn't love him enough. That she didn't love him at all. Nate remembered the way Jenny had looked into his eyes when she'd told the journalist that Carter was the one she loved.

Nate knew those words were not for Carter.

They were for Nate.

He was sure of it. He just had to hear her say it.

He padded barefoot through the hallway, careful not to make too much noise. Henry was long asleep, but it was likely Chuck and Blair were awake, either both reading or getting up to other, more… enjoyable activities with one another. Nate wanted this to just be him and Jenny, just two people in a whirlwind mess of feelings that needed to figure their shit out, doing just that. They didn't need interruptions or distractions. They only needed each other.

He needed her, at the very least.

'Jenny?'

He tapped gently on the door, then heard gentle footsteps coming closer. She unlocked it from the inside and then let it gently swing open to reveal her in a pair of slacks and an old, linen shirt. She looked… put simply, she looked terrible. Her eyes were still red around the edges, her hair was up in a lacklustre way on the top of her head. She was free of any make up and Nate could see the effect, the toll it had all taken on her. Jenny's eyes were without their usual sparkle.

Nate wanted nothing more than to pull her into his arms and hold for however long she needed.

She quickly moved away.

He closed the door behind him.

'You took the ring off,' he remarked.

Jenny merely nodded, gesturing to where it sat on the vanity table across from them.

Nate just wanted her to speak. Anything to let him know she was alright. She sat on the edge of the bed, far enough way that he couldn't reach out and touch her if he tried. He remained standing, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants.

He felt the words coming up. He knew it was the wrong thing to say but, somehow, he just couldn't stop himself.

'How could you ever think that piece of trash would be worth marrying?'

Jenny squeezed her eyes closed.

'If you're here to judge me you can walk back out.'

Nate sighed, frustrated with himself. 'I'm sorry.'

'I never imagined he would do this. I knew he hated you…' she said, looking up with an empty expression. 'I just didn't realise that hate was stronger than his love for me.'

'He's a fool for ever putting anything before you.'

Jenny chuckled bitterly. The sound was quite jarring; the look on her face reminded him of a time when she and Serena were doing battle for his affections; when he'd told Jenny to get out of the apartment when she'd sworn she was telling the truth. How things had changed.

'He's not the first and he won't be the last. What do you want, Nate?'

You, he thought. Only you.

But that's not what he said. He knew they had things to figure out first.

'There's a lot of stuff up in the air right now, between us. I think we should talk about it.'

Jenny wrinkled her nose.

'This isn't how I thought this day would play out when I woke up.'

Nate ignored the weak attempt at changing the subject. He knew Jenny was fragile, but he also knew they needed to work through everything. Now that Carter was out of the picture, it was time they finally addressed their relationship. Whatever it was.

'I know things are hard right now –'

'Do you?'

'Of course I do. I'm in with you whether you like it or not, and I'll be honest, I don't totally understand where this hostility is coming from. I'm not the one who released the pictures. I'm not the one you should be angry with.'

Jenny put her head in her hands. A strand of hair fell down across her cheek and Nate had to fight the urge not to brush it back behind her ear. He realised then that he just wanted to be close to her. He wanted to hold her, cradle her, protect her from everything going on. But she wasn't the same kid he used to rescue; she wasn't the girl who needed him to save her all those years ago. She was grown up now, and she was handling things on her own. Or at least trying to. The idea that she didn't need him ate away at him. He'd always counted on being needed by Jenny Humphrey. Without that… he wasn't entirely sure what his role in her life was.

'I'm sorry,' she said quietly. 'I don't mean to take it out on you.'

Nate sat down next to her on the bed. The motion caused her to drop her hands from her face and look up at him. She seemed to be searching him for something. Maybe she was questioning his role in her life now, too.

'I don't know what to do,' she said, shakily. Nate could hear the lump rising in her throat. He reached out and took her hand.

'We'll get through this together, I promise.'

She sniffed, shaking her head.

'Chuck and Blair think it's best that we stay away from each other.'

'Are you really going to listen to advice from people who picked out those curtains?'

Nate nodded in the direction of some particularly gaudy red and black drapes. Jenny laughed. It was a sweet, tired sounding laugh. Nate only ever wanted to hear her laugh.

'As bad as they are… Chuck and Blair know what they're doing. I think we should listen. For a little while. Dan's coming to get me.'

Nate nodded along with her and, although he strongly disagreed, he didn't tell her that. If anything, a show of unity would help to ride out the storm; to show that a friendship born of happenstance so many years ago was still going strong, no matter what obstacles were thrown in their way. He understood if Jenny wanted time, he just wasn't sure he'd be able to give it to her. He had no idea how he would stay away from her. If anything, not being able to be near her just made it all the more necessary that he was.

'Do you blame me?' she asked him then. It came out in a whisper, and she couldn't look him in the eye. 'I've ruined your future.'

Nate touched her chin with his thumb and lifted her gaze to his own.

'It's not your fault.'

'You never should have come after me that night.'

'You were in trouble,' he told her, stroking her jaw with his fingertip. 'Nothing would have kept me away.'

Jenny's eyelashes fluttered at that. Nate felt butterflies in his stomach. She was looking at him the same way she had after she'd kissed him for the first time, when she was so unsure if she'd done the right thing. Nate waited. If she didn't want this, she'd pull away. Surely.

She didn't.

He ran his fingertip back towards her ear, pressed his palm to the back of her neck, then moved in.

When he was about to kiss her, it was as though he'd found a peace he didn't know he was looking for. That's when she pressed her fingertips to his lips.

'Nate, this isn't a good idea.'

She pulled away from him and stood up, leaving him staring at the headboard. He didn't understand.

'Is it Carter?' he asked, turning where he sat, feeling a bubbling rage coming to life inside.

She looked back at him with her arms folded.

'I just can't-'

'Jenny, we've been heading for this ever since you came back. Ever since we left things unfinished between us five years ago.'

'Unfinished?' she prodded. 'You don't think you made it perfectly clear that you didn't care when you threw me out of the Empire?'

Nate scoffed. 'Are you kidding me? I let you right back in when you needed somewhere to crash. The last time I saw you, you were in my shirt, sitting on my bed. You're the one who left Jenny, not me.'

'There was nothing here for me.'

'Well there is now.'

'Yeah, the scandal of the year, with you – future mayor, probably – smack, dab in the middle of it! How do you not get how serious this all is? This affects you, your future and mine! Waldorf is under so much scrutiny; I reflect on Blair and as much as she tells me it's not my fault, I know somewhere inside she resents me for being that impulsive, destructive kid!'

'We've all made mistakes, Jenny.'

'It's easy for you to say. You probably will recover from this – your grandfather will handle it. You'll walk away from this because of who you are. I don't get that luxury! I worked for every single thing I have, and I could lose it all. You have no idea how that feels.'

Nate flared at the mention if his family. Jenny knew exactly where to strike in order to rile him up; he'd spent his whole life wondering if he'd gotten to where he was because of his blood, and her implying just that didn't help matters. Of all the people in the world, Nate didn't want Jenny to see him that way.

'Why are you getting so angry with me?'

She swore. 'What are you even doing here, Nate? Did you just come to take what you wanted, finally? Came to screw me and then leave, just so you could get it out of your system? I'm not stupid. I know you, Nate. I know how quickly you move from girl to girl – I've been a placeholder in line for you before. You just want what you've never had, and then it'll be over for you.'

'Where is this coming from? I want you, Jenny. You have to know that!'

'You want me for a night. Because then you'll get bored. This whole thing between us – this fascination you have with me isn't really about me. It's about you checking off a list. I know you want me, but you don't want me forever. I've been a tease for you ever since we were dumb teenagers. You were so intrigued by me because you couldn't have me, and don't you get it? That's the only reason you want me now.'

Nate's head was spinning.

'You want me once, for a night, maybe two. But you don't want me forever.'

'You don't know what you're talking about.'

'Yes I do. How long did it take you to go running back to Vanessa after we kissed? How much time did you spend thinking about me when things were tough with Serena, only to go running back to her that time too? I'm just a prize to you. Something you haven't conquered yet. That's all. I've never been enough, and I'm done trying to be.'

'And what am I to you?'

Nate was feeling the need to defend himself, even though she had it all wrong. Sure he wanted her, of course he did. He wouldn't be trying so hard if he didn't! But he wanted her for more than a night. He did want her for good, of that he was certain.

'You are the boy that I have loved for almost half my life, and I spent a long time thinking we were going to end up together.'

'You were right.'

'No I wasn't,' she said, shaking her head. 'I've been on this ride for so long. It's time to get off. It's time to let go.'

'I don't want to let go,' he told her, trying again to take her hands. He succeeded, but only for a moment before she wrenched herself free of him again and crossed to another side of the room.

'That's not your choice. Why are you doing this to me now? Carter just broke my heart, and you're worried about how I feel about you?'

Nate swallowed. He knew how it sounded. Jenny ran her tongue over her lips, eyes gleaming with the onset of tears.

'How can you be so selfish?' she asked.

He didn't know what to say. He was in two minds about everything. On one hand, his friend was standing in front of him in desperate need of comfort and who just needed him to be there. On the other, stood before him was the girl he was almost certain he loved and all he wanted was to tell her so and be loved back, no matter what other men had come before. But she said Carter had broken her heart.

She must have loved him.

The thought made his chest ache.

'Jenny, that's not what I…' he began, but he wasn't sure how the sentence was going to end. He shrugged it off, and she turned away from him to wipe tears from her cheeks. Nate listened as she cried, each sob stabbing at him because there was nothing he could do make it go away.

'I'm sorry,' he told her honestly. 'But I can't fight this anymore. I can't pretend I don't feel this way. I'd be lying if I said I felt sorry that you and Carter are over. I'm sorry for how it happened, but I'm not sorry that he's out of your life. You deserve so much more than he could ever give you.'

Jenny peered at him through long, wet lashes.

'He wanted me to marry him.'

'No he didn't, not really,' Nate said through a sigh. 'He knew he was going to lose you when it all came out. That ring was insurance. He wanted to take you away, get off the radar, right? Marry you quickly so that when it all came out and you came home… you were tied to him. You'd be his wife.'

And you'd never be mine, he wanted to add. But this wasn't about him.

'I'm sorry Jenny, but that's the truth. If he really wanted you forever, he would never have even thought to release those pictures. It's like you said; he hated me more than he loved you. That was his mistake.'

She tilted her chin up and closed her eyes, allowing teardrops to run down her cheeks once more. Her voice was fragile when she spoke.

'How did it all get so screwed up?' She posed the question more to herself than him, Nate assumed.

'He didn't treasure you the way you deserve to be treasured.'

Nate began towards her once more. She opened her eyes as he did, but she didn't protest. Nate decided it was now or never. He understood things were complicated for her, but he couldn't keep it in any longer. It was a truth ready to burst from his chest.

'The way I would treasure you.'

Her mouth curved into the shape of an 'o'.

He stopped in front of her, taking her face in both hands. She licked her lips and peered at his.

'Jenny, I love you.'

She sighed. Her eyes fell closed again, but it wasn't in the way that told Nate she was content. There was a storm in her mind, he could tell. Her hands pulled his away from her face and she moved back to the bed.

'Don't.'

'I said I love you, Jenny,' Nate repeated, eyes narrowing. It was all she'd wanted to hear for so long, wasn't it? All those years spent chasing after him. Now he was hers, completely… and she didn't want to know.

'I said don't.'

Her voice was stern and the look in her eye matched it. The storm was coming to the surface. He could see her hands begin to shake as she started digging in drawers and pulling her clothes out.

'Jenny –'

'Don't say it!'

'I love you.'

'No, you don't!' She turned abruptly on her heel, the icy gaze sending uncomfortable waves through him.

'Yes I do. I love you and you love me.'

'We're strangers, Nate! We have been for years! You don't know me anymore; I'm not poor little Jenny Humphrey that you need to save. I'm not yours.'

'Yes, you are. You always have been.' Nate could feel his own emotions beginning to flare, and he was trying to keep his cool but for her to stand there and imply that she'd never cared enough to belong to him; that she'd never loved him… that was too much.

'You and I will never be strangers. I know exactly how you felt about me all those years, Jenny. I know you loved me. That kind of thing doesn't just go away.'

Jenny's eyes had narrowed, and Nate realised he'd hit a nerve. He just wasn't sure which one it was. There were so many things swirling around them; so many things to say and so many things that needed to be done. Jenny looked hurt and angry and hopeless all at once. And she made fractured look beautiful.

'You knew?'

She posed the question in a quiet manner, but her narrowed eyes suggested it was far more loaded than Nate realised. He nodded slowly, unsure of whether or not he'd made a mistake in admitting that. He wanted to be honest; wanted to tell her that he'd spent so much time wondering what could have been, what they could have had together, how good things could have been. Jenny scoffed again, this time with a malicious look in her eye that reminded him so much of her from all those years ago, when she was truly at her worst.

'You knew.'

The second time she said it sounded far more resigned. Nate was beginning to understand that it had been a mistake.

'You knew I loved you, but you never called me after I left in disgrace. You knew I loved you but you ignored me when I needed you the most after what happened with Chuck. You knew I loved you, and you let me stay in your bed and wear your shirt when you had a girlfriend. You knew I loved you but you ignored the fact that I was completely falling apart.'

Nate tried to interrupt, but it was no use.

'You knew I loved you and you kept me on a hook because of it. You used me! Don't you see that? You're still doing it! You're still keeping me on a line because it makes you feel good. It makes you feel good that you have a woman who'd do anything for you – someone to call on when you need an ear to listen, or a pair of hands to help. This has never been about me! This is all about you and it always will be!'

Jenny's eyes were beginning to dampen with more unshed tears. Nate instinctively moved; he crossed the room in an effort to comfort her, but she pushed him harshly back.

'Don't touch me!' she cried. The weight of her words was so heavy it felt like he might drown in them.

'You knew how much I cared and you always pushed me away. You never cared like I did!'

'I was with Serena –'

'This isn't about Serena! This is about you –'

'What did you expect me to do? I loved her and you were just –'

'What?' she demanded, eyes wide with fury. Nate closed his mouth. The words were too terrible to say. He didn't mean them; he didn't want to mean them. He wanted so badly for them not to be true.

'Just what, Nate?'

He sighed as he peered down at the floor. She already knew what he was going to say, she just wanted to hear it from him. As if somehow it would justify her being so unkind. Nate drew his lips into a thin line. There was no way to phrase it without sounding harsh. He resolved to say it anyway. He had to now.

'Just a distraction.'

Jenny folded her arms.

'Exactly,' she told him, and her voice was remarkably quiet.

There was hum in the room with them. Some sizzling tension that wasn't happy, wasn't good. It was just pain and two people who were slowly breaking one another. Nate wasn't sure how much longer he could handle it; he just knew he had to make her see reason. He had to make her understand that whatever had happened in the past, whatever had gone on between them, it didn't matter now.

Because he loved her.

'For the longest time all I wanted was to be loved by you. And now that you tell me I am… it makes me sick,' she said, grabbing a nearby overnight bag and beginning to throw clothes into it.

'You don't mean that,' he said. 'We can fix this.'

'There's nothing to fix. This was never a relationship, and I'm done pretending that you ever really gave a damn about me. We both know you kept me around to boost your own ego, and that's exactly what you're doing now. You desperately want it to be true that I somehow left Carter for you; that I chose you. But guess what, Nate? I didn't. I said I'd marry him. I chose him.'

She zipped the bag up and threw it over her shoulder, then pulled on her boots.

'You and I both know that's not what you really wanted anyway,' he told her, his gaze following her as she moved around the room.

Jenny rolled her eyes and made for the door, but Nate put himself between them. They were nose to nose. Suddenly the hum in the room was louder, much louder, so loud that Nate could hear it in every part of him. He had to swallow when his eyes flitted between Jenny's eyes and her lips. She pursed them just at that moment.

'And what do I want?' she challenged him, standing straighter and trapping him against the door.

Her gaze went to his lips too, but only for a moment. When their eyes met again, Nate didn't recognise the icy blue looking back at him. He thought it may have been hatred. He hoped it wasn't, but he had to be realistic. Still, he knew Jenny Humphrey. They weren't strangers at all; they never would be. Wherever and whenever they were in the world, they would move in perfect harmony because that's what they did. They were always in sync, always perfect, always meant to be.

'You want me,' he said, 'And I want you too.'

He placed one hand on the back of her neck and pressed his lips to hers. It was everything. Everything he should have told her from the moment they first kissed on the sidewalk, everything he should have done from the moment he kissed her again at the fashion show. It was everything Nate wanted to tell her for the rest of his life. It was an I love you that told her she was only ever going to be the one for him. She was the only thing he wanted. Jenny made a sound somewhere deep in her throat, a moan that sent a shock through Nate as he wove his free arm around her waist and walked her back up to the bed. Jenny obliged; he'd expected her to fight but, deep down, they both knew this was all that mattered. It was all that had ever mattered.

They'd always been heading for this.

Always moving towards each other.

And that's when she pushed him away and moved to the door once more. Nate's head was dizzy from the kiss; she had an ability like no other girl ever had to make him question everything with just one brush of her lips. He was only just coming back around when he heard Jenny speak.

'I can't do this.'

Nate turned to face her.

'We're done.'

It should have sounded venomous; Nate knew that's how she'd intended it. But it just came out sad and defeated. Broken. She lingered in the doorway for a moment.

'All that time I spent imagining what my life could have been like with you… all the time I spent wishing you loved me back, thinking about what we might have had.'

Nate had to swallow hard to prevent himself from welling up.

Jenny's lips quivered as fresh tears sprung from her eyes. She attempted a smile, but it was so fractured that he could see the sadness pouring through.

'I never imagined this,' she whispered.

She left the door swinging on its hinges when she walked away from him.

But he couldn't leave it there. Nate chased her down to the reception area, to where the front door opened on the street, and they weren't the only ones awake now. Chuck came down the stairs after them.

'Jennifer, Nathaniel, what on earth is going on?'

'It's fine, Chuck,' Nate informed him, but Chuck looked past him anyway.

'Jenny? Are you alright?'

'I'm going to Dan and Serena's and I won't be back.'

Chuck seemed to understand.

'I'll ask Dorota to send what's left of your things on.'

'Don't bother,' Jenny said, beginning to tap her foot as she waited for Dan to arrive. 'I don't want any of it.'

'Jenny –' Chuck began, but Nate cut him off.

'Jenny, we need to talk about this.'

'We've been talking!' she cried. 'There's nothing left to say. Just let me go, please.'

The way she bit her lip to fight back tears told Nate she wanted otherwise, but just as he was going to press the issue there was a gentle knock at the door. Chuck proceeded to open it, and when Dan stepped into the room Jenny threw herself into his arms,

'Jen, I'm so sorry I couldn't get here any earlier,' he said, hugging her close. She sobbed into his chest.

'Please just take me away,' she pleaded.

Dan looked first at Chuck, who offered nothing more than an unclear shake of his head. Nate was next, and as much as he tried hard he couldn't hide the guilty look on his face. Dan saw through it right away; they were friends, after all. His grip tightened around his sister and he began steering her towards the door. He took the bag she had and threw the strap of it over his own shoulder. He glanced once more at Nate.

'What did you do?'

Nate couldn't even find the words. He leaned back against the wall, defeated.

A flash of a camera blinded them all momentarily.

Then came the second, the third and finally a fourth.

Before long, there was a host of photographers outside the front door.

'Miss Humphrey, do you have anything to say about the photos?'

'Are you and Mr Archibald an item?'

'Is it true you're marrying Carter Baizen?'

'How do you feel about ruining Mr Archibald's future?'

Nate was lost for words. He could only watch as Dan and Chuck pushed their way through the photographers and bundled Jenny into the waiting cab. Dan got in after her and Chuck closed the door. They were away.

The photographers turned back to Nate and the questions flooded his ears.

'Are you in love with Miss Humphrey?'

'How long as this relationship been carrying on?'

'How old was Miss Humphrey when you took those pictures?'

Chuck closed the door on them, then proceeded through to his study where he said he was calling the police to deal with the nuisance outside. He swore to himself as he went, cussing them for likely waking his wife and son. Nate was left alone in the foyer of the house. Suddenly it felt so much bigger, like anything that really mattered had disappeared and, really, with the exodus of Jenny, it had. Nate took a seat on the carpeted stair case and put his heads in his hands.

What had he done?

He truly thought telling Jenny he loved her was the right thing.

He really thought she'd say it back.

He thought they'd be happy.

Serena enveloped Jenny in a hug the moment she spilled through the door in a mess of tears and shaking limbs. If there was one thing she could count on, it was that Serena's hugs truly made her feel safe and warm and like nothing could hurt her. But even that was doubtful, Jenny thought, as Serena took her through to the guest room – or what had become much more like Jenny's bedroom – and sat her down on the bed. Serena kept her arms around Jenny, who was glad of the contact. She just needed someone to tell her things would be alright, even if she didn't quite believe it herself.

'We're so sorry this happened, Jenny.'

Serena had told her this a little later on, when the two of them each had a steaming mug of cocoa in one hand. Serena's other hand was entwined with one of Jenny's. Dan was fending off phone calls to his cell phone asking for comments on the scandal. Eventually he tired of it and threw his phone through to the hallway, where it hit the wall and fell to the floor with a dull thud.

'Was that really the best solution?' Serena asked, raising her eyebrows at him.

'I was picturing Carter Baizen on the wall. If he ever shows his face here again…'

'Trust me love,' Serena said, squeezing Jenny's hand. 'I can think of a few people you'll have to get in line behind.'

'Don't say his name,' Jenny said quietly, before taking a sip of her cocoa.

'What do you need from us, Jen?' Dan asked, scooting closer where he sat on the floor.

'I want to forget he ever existed,' she told them, staring at nothing in particular. The numbness was starting to set in. She certainly thought she was out of tears to cry.

'It'll be hard for a little while, Jenny,' said Serena, pulling her hand free of Jenny's in order to wrap it around her future sister-in-law's shoulders instead. 'It won't just go away. You loved him.'

'Did I?' Jenny asked, though it was more a question to herself.

She really didn't know if she'd ever loved Carter; she loved the idea of being loved, and she appreciated that they had things in common. They were both cast out of the Upper East Side, they were both vilified – perhaps unfairly – and they did make each other happy for a while there. But it all changed when Jenny returned home. Of course it would. She was always a different person when she was in Manhattan. She just didn't really know who that person was anymore.

She wasn't sure what that person wanted, whether it was Carter and being married to a man she wasn't even certain she loved. Or maybe it was Nate and just letting him have her for one night to get it out of their system the way she thought they both needed to. She'd believed herself when she told Nate he only wanted her for the night. They'd been dancing to this tune since she was fourteen years old. It was the intrigue, the mystery, the flirtation that they both needed to be rid of.

Jenny knew what Nate was like, deep down. He'd get bored, because he always did.

He would.

Wouldn't he?

'Nate told me he loved me,' she admitted out loud at long last.

Dan and Serena exchanged surprised looks, but there was something knowing in their eyes too. Serena squeezed Jenny's shoulder.

'You don't owe him anything,' Dan reminded her, and Jenny nodded.

'How do you feel about him?' Serena asked carefully.

Jenny shrugged. She'd spent years thinking she loved him, and even if she did, everything was such a mess. She didn't believe that he loved her back, and yesterday morning she'd agreed to marry another man! Jenny had no idea how she really felt. Her fifteen year old self was begging her to go back to the Bass house, throw her arms around Nate and kiss him until she couldn't breathe…

But the rest of her, the heartbroken part of her, knew deep down it could never last.

'Every single time I let Nate into my heart, it gets broken.'

Dan drew his lips into a thin line and reached up to where Jenny was sitting on the bed. He gave her a knee a supportive squeeze and she took his hand, if only to feel the kind of unconditional love she'd always craved. She knew she'd always find it with him.

'After what's just happened… I don't know if I believe him.' She turned to Serena. 'You and I both know how quickly he goes from girl to girl.'

'Jenny, Nate's changed a lot since you last lived here,' Serena gently reminded her. 'I believe him, if he told you that. But… this is your choice and no one's going to force you to make it before you're ready.'

Jenny turned her face to the ceiling. Suddenly she was overcome with more tears. She felt someone take the cocoa from her, then felt Dan sit down next to her on the end of the bed. Jenny tried hard to keep the emotion at bay, but she couldn't fight it. She felt like she'd been holding all this in for so long, ever since she left for Hudson.

'I don't know who I am anymore.'

Dan took her into his arms and she buried her face in his neck. Serena stroked her hair, moving closer so that Jenny was cradled between them both.

'I don't know what I want, or who I want or if I even want anyone! I don't even have a home anymore.'

'You always have a home with us, Jen,' Dan reminded her as he pulled her closer.

'Carter told me he loved me, and he still hurt me, and Nate's hurt me so many times before and I just… I need to be alone. I need to figure out who I am again, away from them both.' Jenny pulled her away from Dan just slightly.

'Those photos of me… half of them aren't even real but people won't care, and Nate was there to help! He never did anything wrong, and now because of me he might not run for mayor, and he could get into serious trouble and my capability of working for Waldorf is in question. I just can't believe any of this...'

Serena brushed hair from Jenny's face, then hushed her quietly.

'Everything will be okay. It really will.'

'We're going to help you through this, Jen.'

'Chuck and Blair will handle the photographs,' Serena said. 'You shouldn't think about those. They'll protect you, and Nate too. Nothing will go wrong on their watch.'

Dan was nodding, then he spoke.

'As for you, you're going to stay here for a little while – you're going to call Dad tomorrow, and Mom too. Then we're going to start looking for a place for you live, but only when you're ready. The rest… figuring out what you want, Nate, Carter… it'll all work itself out in time.'

'You're family, Jenny. We're here for you.' Serena kissed Jenny's cheek, and then rested her head on her shoulder.

Dan kissed the top of Jenny's head.

'It'll be alright,' he told her.

Somehow, despite how bad things were, deep down she thought about believing him.

So... things are not good at the moment. As much as Nate loves her, Jenny just isn't in the right headspace and she doesn't believe him. It remains to be seen whether or not her knight in shining Armani will be able to change her mind... and where will Carter fit into all this? He doesn't seem the type to go quietly into the night. Stay tuned and please leave a review guys! It can be quite disheartening to see the number of hits the story gets compared to the number of reviews... Help a girl out. x