A/N: Fuck. This chapter clocks in at just under 7,000 words without the author's note.

This is a big chapter. There's a lot. A LOT. But I really want to get this story finished, because I worry that if I leave it much longer, things will wind down in terms of my writing in the GG verse, and I owe it to all of you who've stuck with me this far. There's one chapter left to come after this one. I hope you enjoy and cry as much as I did when I was writing it. Onward! x

Unclean Hands

The incessant knocking on her door was enough to rile Jenny up. She hadn't touched her morning coffee and waffles, and she was already half an hour later than she should have been that morning; she was expecting an earful from Blair when she eventually made it to the atelier later that day. Jenny wasn't even sure why she'd slept in. Perhaps her realisations of yesterday had been all too much for her body to cope with. Perhaps finally admitting how she felt about a certain Mr Archibald was a way to destress, and the deep sleep her body had succumbed to was her reaction to letting that stress out.

It was better than getting emotional, she supposed.

She'd been trying to plan out her day; the day. The day of finally, the day of at last, the day where it would all begin again. The day she'd finally let Nate in after all these years.

And now she was pissed off already. She was ready to give whoever was on the other side of her door what for. When she wrenched it open, an enormous bouquet of white roses stared back at her. Jenny was remiss, all of her anger fading away as she took in the sight of them. A smile bloomed on her face, wondering at just who might have sent them; wondering if just, maybe, Nate had anticipated her. Sure, roses weren't her favourites but she could let that go.

Her smile faltered when it was Agnes who stepped around them, grinning as she made her way into Jenny's home.

'It's day one of our new lives,' Agnes announced, setting the flowers on Jenny's coffee table and then helping herself to the cup of coffee Jenny had prepared for herself. Jenny wasn't entirely impressed with the display, but ignored the feeling in her gut nonetheless.

Instead, she sat herself at the breakfast bar, Agnes sitting on the other side, and began digging into her waiting breakfast.

'Sounds fun,' Jenny began, narrowing her eyes over her fork. 'Do tell.'

Agnes tore a corner off Jenny's waffle and scoffed it down as though she hadn't eaten in days. There was something in the way she looked at the food that made Jenny's stomach knot slightly; something in the way Agnes looked, too. Jenny remembered how skinny she'd appeared when they'd bumped into one another in the department store weeks, almost months, ago. And yesterday when Agnes had downed not only her own latte but Jenny's too, yet forewent any food from the menu.

'Manipedis first, then brunch, then shopping, followed by drinks at this new place downtown, supposed to be to die for - J?'

'I'm listening,' Jenny told her, but Agnes shook her head, biting at another piece of waffle.

'No,' she said through a mouthful. 'It's called J.'

'You can't be serious,' Jenny said, gawping at the girl. She hadn't said two words to Carter since their stormy break up at the airport, and now Agnes wanted to take her to his very restaurant for drinks?

'I can't go there!'

Agnes rolled her eyes. 'Oh, please! What better way to show that you're over a guy than rolling up to his joint and enjoying yourself in front of him?'

Jenny remained skeptical. Sure, she wanted the world to know she was done with Carter for good, that she would soon be moving on to the only man who made any sense; the one who'd been there all along, even through their ups and downs. But it didn't feel right.

'I don't know.'

Agnes sighed. 'Look, Jenny. I know you and I know you're a good person.' Agnes said it in such a way that she made it seem like a bad thing. 'But after what he did to you, he doesn't deserve your pity, or your empathy. Show him what he lost!'

Jenny remained uncertain, so much so that she shook her head. But Agnes wasn't to be put off. She reached over and touched Jenny's hand.

'Just think about it over manipedis, okay?'

This made Jenny smile. It had been a little while since she'd treated herself to a pampering and as a result, her nails were chipped and needed tidying up. She nibbled at some of them and they were in desperate needs of attention, lest they snag any of her clothes. And perhaps Agnes was right, perhaps all Carter did deserve was to see how well she was doing without him. Jenny agreed, at length, then made her way through to the bedroom to fix herself up for the day.

When she arrived back in the lounge, Agnes had moved to the couch and was flipping through and issue of Vogue. One of Jenny's designs was featured inside.

'Can I borrow your phone?' Jenny asked, as she finished attaching the back to her earring.

'Why?' Agnes bit out immediately. Jenny was surprised, and her expression must have given her away because Agnes added: 'Sorry, I just mean why because yours is right there?' She was pointing to where the television was and, just around the side of it, Jenny's cell.

Jenny frowned.

'Oh.'

She was sure it hadn't been there last night. She'd searched all through the apartment when she got home, having realised she must have left it either there or in Chuck's office. Being the former, she supposed it saved her a trip.

'Oh, crap,' Jenny muttered, eyeing the screen.

Eight missed calls between Blair and Serena, two from Dan. A text message from Blair that made Jenny's heart sink.

Don't make me come to you.

Had she forgotten a meeting? A conference call? Was she supposed to have been watching Henry this morning?

Agnes appeared by her side, reading the text over her shoulder.

'It's probably nothing that big,' she said offhandedly. 'You know how dramatic Blair can be.'

Jenny smirked, but it fell upon realising that she did yes, but Agnes did not. When Jenny looked questioningly at her, Agnes shrugged.

'Oh come on, Blair's tantrums are hardly private news. The whole city knows she's a brat.'

Jenny felt something hot pool in her stomach.

'She's my friend.'

'Doesn't mean she isn't a brat.'

Jenny didn't know what to say to that; the only things that came to mind were rude and judgmental comments she could make about Agnes, and how she'd screwed up in her younger years. But as Jenny looked at her and Agnes looked right back, Jenny felt more like her fifteen year old self than she had in a while. She felt like someone Agnes liked, and Jenny had wanted that more than anything when they'd first met. Maybe she wanted it still.

'Look,' Agnes said, breaking the silence. She took Jenny by the arms. 'I'm sorry. She is your friend and I shouldn't talk about her that way. But I'm sure whatever it is can't be that bad; Blair has a flair for the dramatic,' Jenny smiled small at this, and Agnes went on. 'Let's go enjoy our day, you can be back in the office by three, and then we can head out again after you're finished with whatever it is Blair wants from you.'

Agnes looked imploringly into Jenny's eyes, smiling. Jenny rolled her eyes and nodded.

As she turned around to find her purse, she decided she may as well enjoy the day before her scalding from Blair, she decided.

And that was the moment a scalding rush of pain ripped through the back of her head, and she saw black.

'Something is wrong,' Chuck decided.

He sat in his living room, flanked by Blair and Serena, while Dan and Nate took the opposite seats. They'd been summoned by Blair early that morning, as she'd been eager to find out if they too had been subject to the cruelty of the evening before. As it turns out, both Dan and Serena had come under the villainous scrutiny of Jenny's text message. Nate had yet to comment on the matter; in fact, he hadn't spoken to any of them since arriving thirty minutes earlier.

'Yes,' Blair agreed. 'Our friend, your sister,' she bit at Dan with particular venom, 'has shown herself for who she truly is. A betrayer and a usurper.'

Dan scrunched his nose at this. 'Usurper? Really?'

'For all we know she could be planning on taking Waldorf directly from under me,' Blair went on as though Dan had not spoken. 'She could be poisoning my employees as we speak, whispering nastiness and untruths about me to make them trust her, so that when she goes they go to and I will be left with nothing but the shell of a company my mother entrusted to me.'

With the exception of Nate, who looked at the floor, the rest of them stared at her.

At length, it was Serena who said: 'B, that's ridiculous.'

Blair turned a vicious glare on her best friend, but it soon faded to a look of despair. Turning to look at her hands in her lap, Blair spoke again but this time much softer, much weaker.

'I don't understand.'

Chuck covered her hands with his one of his own, giving them an affectionate squeeze as he did. He then turned back to the rest of the group and repeated himself.

'Something's wrong and whatever it is, none of us are privy to it. Now I may have a lead that can help us understand what exactly Jennifer's motives were with these obscene messages,' Chuck paused at the memory of how the text had told him that she hated his son. He allowed himself to feel the anger momentarily, before coming back to the task at hand.

'The texts were pretty clear,' Serena said, and her hand went to her stomach. Dan looked lovingly at her, but his eyes were sad when he turned to look at Chuck.

'All Jenny ever wanted was to be part of this world,' he told them all. 'Sure she had her issues with us all,' he threw a sideways glance at Nate, whose eyes were still glued to the floor. 'But that was all in the past. Things were good, things are good. None of this makes any sense.'

He looked to Serena for reassurance, and was granted it.

'We have to figure out what's going on before we confront her,' Serena said. 'Chuck, you said you had an idea?'

He nodded, removing his hand from Blair's and reaching into the breast pocket of his suit jacket to retrieve his cell phone. He'd made sure to forward the text message from Jenny's phone to his own in order for him to keep tabs on the situation. If there was one thing Chuck Bass knew how to do, it was to protect his family.

He passed the phone around and it was received with some gasps (Serena and Blair) and some anger (Dan's nose flared in a way that Chuck hadn't seen since he'd been punched in the face by Humphrey on the night he'd wanted to propose to Blair the first time). Nate only glanced at the cell phone that Dan held out to him, but suddenly his entire demeanour changed. He sat straighter in his chair, more alert, and his eyes took on a darker look. In place of resignation, there was hope, and in place of heartbreak, there was anger.

'Who sent that to her?' He said when he finally spoke.

Chuck shook his head.

'It traced back to a burner phone; I've got Robert tracking down the buyer as we speak,' he assured both Nate and Dan, who had made to speak before he'd finished.

'So, what?' Blair asked no one in particular. 'We assume that whoever this person is, they're responsible for those hideous messages last night? We immediately allow Jennifer a reprieve from guilt? Just like that?'

'Of course we do,' Nate said, and in his voice there sounded something akin to a warning. He sounded desperate. 'Of course we believe that.' He stopped himself when his voice quivered.

'Despite out friendships with her,' Blair replied, though her voice was softer as she looked at Nate. She must have known how much he had been affected by this, they all did.

'Jenny was always easily turned when we were young. She strayed quickly and stupidly and selfishly -'

'And we didn't?' Dan interrupted hotly, eyes boring into Blair's. It was enough to silence her, but not to stop him.

'Why are you so desperate to make her the villain here? Why won't you at least try and see that there's something else going on?'

'Dan,' Serena placed a hand on his arm. He had risen from the chair in his anger, and Chuck had done the same in defence of his way. He could feel his blood heating as Dan had drawn closer.

Neither man spoke - they didn't need to. Despite all their fallings out in the past, all their hatred and all their ill-will… it was in the past. They both took their seats once more, a parting nod the only evidence that there may have been any kind of issue. The silence around them all was heavy. Serena implored Dan to calm down with just a look, and he did. Nate's gaze had returned to the floor.

'Because it's easier,' Blair said, and her voice was so quiet had there been any other sound in the room they would have mistaken her words for a shuffle of feet or a breeze coming through the drapes.

Dan sat back in his chair, defeated, and Blair spoke again.

'It's easier to think that she was never really part of this family, because it hurts far too much to know that she was and that she could say those things.'

'My darling,' Chuck said in a voice that was only for his wife. 'You know Jenny loves you as a sister, and she loves our son almost as much as we do. I know that something isn'r right, and deep down so do you.'

When Blair finally met his gaze with her own, he saw that her eyelashes were wet with unshed tears. She leaned into him, despite their company, and allowed him to take her in his arms.

'We should have protected her from all of it; Carter, the photographs and now this person on her phone-'

'We will.'

It was not Chuck that spoke, nor Dan or Serena. Nate was on his feet, pulling his jacket on and making for the door. His expression was one of determination.

'Where are you going?' Serena asked, rising to her feet as the others followed suit.

Nate turned back as he reached the door, his hand on the knob.

'I'm going to find the woman I love.'

It had been two days.

Two days without any kind of contact; no messages, no phone calls, no emails. No face to face.

Nate was pacing. When he'd arrived at Jenny's apartment, he'd found the door open, her and her purse gone, a vase of white roses smashed on floor and - he swallowed as the thought returned to him - drops of blood on the gray carpet. He'd gone straight to the bathroom to throw up. Chuck had been over in less than ten minutes with the cops and his PI, Robert, who was assisting in their investigation.

Nate hadn't slept.

Neither had Dan, who was sat on the couch nursing a scotch he hadn't touched since Chuck had poured it for him an hour earlier.

The lack of sleep hadn't made Nate dreary; instead he was restless, alert. He almost didn't recognise his own reflection when he went to wash his face in the bathroom. The cold water was a welcome shock to his system. It sent him careening back to himself quickly, but for a moment too long. He missed the knock on his door; if he'd heard he would have rushed out, praying to find Jenny there waiting for him.

Instead, when he made his way back to the lounge, he found Dan on his feet and a another man standing with his back to Nate. Taking another step, Nate realised he recognised the back of the man's head. Immediately, his fists curled and strode over, rounding on Carter Baizen.

'What the hell are you doing here?'

'I called him,' Dan said, before Carter had a chance to reply. 'Calm down,' Dan went on, placing a hand on Nate's shoulder and pushing him away.

'Look Archibald, I'm not here to rehash this thing between us. I hate you, and you hate me.' Carter was matter-of-fact in his way, but he didn't shrink away from Nate. Rather, he moved closer so that they were eye to eye.

'But we both love Jenny. I'm here for her, not you.'

Nate wrinkled his nose in disgust.

'If you loved her the way I do, you never would have done what you did.'

Carter drew his lips into a thin line, as if some recognition was crossing his face. Nate watched the different ways his eyes looked in the space of those seconds until, finally, he stepped backwards and nodded his head.

'I know that, I know.' He paused to run a hand through his hair. 'I owe her this. I've got to find her.'

'We've got a lead.'

Chuck strode through to the lounge, ignoring but not not registering Carter's presence. He was flanked by a police detective - Det. Malcolm, he had introduced himself as earlier - and Robert, his own personal investigator. Chuck dropped the case file onto the table between them all. Nate went directly to it, as did Carter, and they both stopped short of it to regard one another instead.

'Baizen,' Chuck said grimly. 'Robert and the detective have some questions for you, if you wouldn't mind.'

Carter looked between them all, lingering a moment longer on Nate.

'They're not asking,' Chuck pressed, and Carter went through to one of the bedrooms with the two investigators. They closed the door behind them.

'He's a suspect?' Dan asked, to which Chuck nodded.

'Of course he is,' Nate said hotly. 'You know what he did to her - those photographs? He tried to ruin her. Who knows what else he has planned?'

'Look Carter messed up,' Dan said, throwing his hands up. 'Don't like at me like that! She's my sister.' He warned Nate, who immediately flared. 'I'll never forgive Carter for what he did and neither will she, but none of here can deny the way he looked when he got here. He cares.'

'No he doesn't! Not like I do - you don't know how this feels!'

'Pull your head out of your ass Nate!' Dan retaliated. 'Just for one second please realise you are not the only person here who cares about Jenny! Serena and Blair are distraught, at home with Henry who doesn't understand why his Aunt J missed two of their playdates. My parents found out through the news that their daughter is missing because I'm too stubborn to call my damn mother! I'm a mess! We all are!' Dan finished, his lip quivering. His eyes were wide with alarm.

Chuck stepped between them, steering Dan to the nearby couch.

'This is not a competition about who loves Jennifer more. This is just about finding her.'

'I'm sorry, Dan,' Nate said. Dan said nothing in reply to him, just stared ahead as he clasped his hands in front of his face.

'What's the lead?'

'One of Jenny's neighbours went to the cops this morning; he thinks he saw a young woman coming in through the lobby with a vase of white roses.'

'Why didn't he come forward sooner?' Nate asked, brimming with fury. 'We could have found her by now.'

'Who's the girl?' Dan asked suddenly.

'We rolled back the footage from the security cameras,' Chuck said, moving to the file he'd dropped on the table. When he handed the photograph to Dan first, and secondly to Nate, both their expressions turned hard.

'Agnes Andrews,' they said in unison.

The rope around her wrist was starting to draw blood. Jenny hissed in pain, dry tear streaks moving down to her open mouth, from which she cried out. Surely someone could hear her! There had to be someone nearby… where on earth was she? She must still be in the city; she could hear traffic moving at all hours outside. She wondered how many times she'd passed by a building, totally innocent to what might have been going on inside.

She must have been high up, too. The windows never gave away any sign of someone walking past during the day, and it's not like Jenny had nowhere else to look.

She had nothing else to think of. She'd been there for two days, she thought, maybe three? She also thought she'd forgotten what time it was that she'd arrived. Her watch had disappeared, along with her jacket, her purse, her shoes and her cell phone. Smart, she thought. Keep her from contacting anyone.

A fresh tear slipped.

Dan would come for her.

Nate would come.

They all would.

If only they knew where she was.

A gasp escaped her.

She'd never been so alone.

She'd never been so scared.

And suddenly, she heard footsteps.

'Hello?' she called out, weak and thirsty.

A key turned into the lock of the door.

'Where am I?' She asked, weak again but determined now. 'Where's Agnes?'

A figure stepped into the room, small, skinny, with long dark hair. In the terrible light, and because of the dehydration, Jenny wasn't entirely sure she wasn't hallucinating. Until the person spoke, and Jenny knew.

'Well well, little J. Not looking so glamorous now.'

Agnes stepped into the light. Jenny let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding in. Agnes had on Jenny's jacket, her shoes, her watch and her purse. All of the things that made Jenny 'Jenny' in the eyes of the world and the eyes of the people who didn't know her.

'What are you doing?' Jenny breathed out.

Agnes closed the distance between them. She crouched low, so that she could whisper in Jenny's ear.

'Finally getting what I deserve.'

She grabbed a fistful of Jenny's hair and wrenched, hard. Fresh tears burned Jenny's eyes, and she looked up to see a patch of her own blonde hair in Agnes' fist.

'I always thought your blonde would look great on me.' She looked viciously down at Jenny then. 'I'll bring you some water when I come back from the salon.' She touched her own dark locks, and Jenny noticed the engagement ring that was no longer on her finger.

Jenny shook her head. 'You're crazy.'

Agnes shoved Jenny back against the wall and stood up.

'Catch you later, little J,' she laughed, slamming the door and locking it behind her.

'So, what?' Carter asked, running behind Nate along the street. 'We're just running to every address that Chuck texts, because she might be there?'

Panting, Nate stopped and turned around. 'Yes, Baizen, alright? That's the plan. We're doing it so that we can find Jenny. If you've got a problem with that, then feel free to leave.'

Carter was already walking away.

Nate went after him. 'Are you kidding me? You try and convince me that you love this girl but as soon as it gets too hard for you, you walk away? You are unbelievable!'

Carter raised his eyebrows, then gestured to the cab he'd hailed for them both.

Nate's expression remained like thunder as they got in and headed to the next address in Brooklyn.

Meanwhile, Chuck and Dan were directing traffic of sorts.

'Agnes visited all these places in the last few days?' Dan asked, double checking the list. 'I should be out there with them, looking.'

Chuck shook his head. 'I need you here. Robert and the detective are on the ground too. We're doing our best for Jennifer like this. You and I are the fastest readers - save for my wife, of course, but she's with Henry and keeping Serena calm.' He paused, then clapped Dan on the back.

'I realise now isn't the opportune moment, but congratulations, Humphrey.' When Dan looked curiously at him, Chuck shrugged. 'Blair can keep a secret, but Serena's glowing and there was something about her yesterday. So, congratulations.'

Dan nodded, smiling despite himself.

'Thank you.'

When Agnes returned from the salon, Jenny felt as though she were looking in a mirror. Agnes glared down at her through a pair of Jenny's own sunglasses. Jenny couldn't fault the hair; she looked as close as Jenny as she could get without stealing her actual face.

'What's the plan, exactly?' Jenny asked. Her lips were dry. Agnes threw a bottle of water down at her, and it hit Jenny in the stomach. It made the next words painful: 'You think you can just turn into me?'

Agnes scoffed. 'Little J -'

'Stop calling me that.'

'That's never what I wanted.' Agnes crouched beside her, then sat back against the wall. She took Jenny's hand in her own, and sighed as they sat together. Jenny's skin began to crawl at the feel of her would-be friend.

'I hate you, Jenny Humphrey. But I love your life, and that's what I want.'

Jenny felt the constricting pressure of Agnes' hand around her own. Jenny laid her back against the wall, shaking her head subtly at the ridiculous notion.

'You are crazy - argh!'

Agnes twisted Jenny's arm enough to make it pop, then raked her nails along the inside of her wrist. It was a hot pain that lasted a long time after its infliction. She threw Jenny back against the wall then, and again, and again. Jenny head smacked hard the third time, and combined with the dehydrated and weakened state she was in, her vision blurred. But it didn't dissuade her.

'They'd never let you in.'

'They won't have a choice.'

Before Jenny could ask, Agnes strode to the window and spread her arms wide in the sun.

'When they find us, and they will; I left plenty of clues and I'm sure Chuck will be able to follow the bread trail. When they do, we'll both be on the ground. You, dead. And me…' she turned to Jenny with such a look on her face that turned Jenny's blood to ice.

'Covered in your blood from how I tried to save your life.'

Jenny's breath caught in her throat.

She'd always hoped she'd be brave, when the end came. She'd never really pictured it but she knew she wanted to be brave. And she didn't feel that way now. All she felt were the people she loved; her parents, Dan and Serena and the baby she'd never get to meet, Chuck and Blair and Henry and even Carter… and Nate… oh god, Nate. He'd never know how she really felt. How much she really cared. A sob escaped at the thought of his loneliness, of how sad he'd looked when she told him they'd only be friends, despite how he'd tried to hide it.

Jenny broke from her reverie to find Agnes smirking down at her. And suddenly, it was as if a pool of some dark rage broke from inside her; all the parts of herself she'd tried to conceal since she'd moved back to the city, all the horrible words and thoughts she'd tried to maintain to keep from hurting others. Now they were coming out and, if she was going down, she'd be going down fighting.

'You think they'll believe you?'

Agnes did not answer; Jenny thought she was probably working too hard to keep her resolve strong.

'You have no idea who you're dealing with,' Jenny warned her, and as she did she saw flashes of the people she knew would be looking for her right at that moment.

She saw Blair on the warpath, Serena close behind with eyes like lightning as they scoured the city for their friend. She saw Dan tearing through papers and security cameras and barking instructions as he looked for anything, any small clue that would lead him to her. Through all their hardships, they'd never given up. She saw Chuck moving chess pieces across a board, people doing his bidding as he worked the city like a game that he owned, just so he could find her.

Finally, she saw Nate. She saw him on the phone, in police stations, at train stops, walking the streets, scouring buildings and rooms and lobbies and parks and ice rinks; anywhere he might find her, because she knew the look of love when she saw it. All this time, in all the different ways he'd looked at her, she'd seen it. And she know that if their roles were reversed, she tear the world apart to find him if she had to.

'You want my life?' Jenny barked, struggling against the rope that bound just one of her wrists. She pulled, hard, ignoring the burning in her wrist and the needle-like feel of the rope against her cut flesh. She found strength from somewhere inside, and just like that, she pulled again.

'Come and get it.'

'We've got her!' Dan near bellowed down the phone.

'Where?' Nate demanded, gripping Carter's arm. The latter did the same.

'Sending the address - we're on our way. Malcolm and Robert are en route with a squad.'

Nate's heart lifted as the phone clicked off, and he did something then that he never thought he'd do in his life. He shared a smile with Carter Baizen; it was relief, hope, love. It was everything he couldn't wait to tell Jenny when he finally found her.

They were off.

Jenny's arm hung loosely at her side as she circled Agnes. The notch of the broken pipe she'd been tied to had cut the back of her arm. Her shoulder felt like broken glass beneath her skin and she was panting from the pain, but she refused to let else anything happen. It was as though the thought of Nate had been enough to pull her from weakened state; she wasn't going to let Agnes win that easily.

'It's cute, this 'last stand' thing you have going on, little J.'

Agnes reached into the purse that hung loosely at her arm, then dropped it to the ground. When Jenny looked up from where it had fallen, she found herself looking down the barrel of a hand-gun.

Suddenly, she didn't know if she could win this fight.

'But it's not enough. You've lost everything - your friends hate you, I made sure of that. They're not looking.'

Jenny eyed her through narrow slits.

'What are you talking about?'

Agnes kicked the purse over to her, ordering Jenny to retrieve her own cell phone. She did as she was told, unlocking it and scrolling through her texts. When she read each one that had been sent, she felt sick. She shook even more violently than she had been. She looked up at Agnes through wet eyelashes.

'They wouldn't believe this.'

Agnes laughed at her, a pitying sound that chilled Jenny to the core.

'It's been almost three days, you fool. They're not looking. Don't you get it?'

Jenny swallowed back a retort. The hot lump in her throat made it hard to talk amongst the tears.

'They don't care. They never did. Now,' Agnes cocked the gun higher and strode over.

'Get on your knees.'

'Agnes, please…'

The gun went to Jenny's chest.

'Get. on. your. knees.'

Jenny sank to them, and Agnes kicked the phone from her hands. Then the gun came up again, perched against Jenny's forehead. She looked up at Agnes through pleading eyes. This couldn't be how it all ended.

She'd pictured a house; nothing extravagant but big enough for a family. She'd pictured lazy Sunday mornings in bed with her husband - with Nate. There was no point denying that anymore. She'd pictured them raising their children - two girls and a boy. She'd pictured holidays in the Hamptons, camping in the woods, sending them to college, growing old in Nate's arms.

She'd pictured it all, and he would never know.

Another involuntary sob escaped her, and she couldn't keep herself still. The shakes became unbearable, the feel of the gun against her forehead, the ringing in her ears as she finally realised, once and for all, that this was the very end for her.

'Just please tell him…'

'I will.'

If it weren't for their current situation, Jenny might have thought she believed Agnes.

'Bye bye, little bird,' Agnes whispered, and Jenny heard the safety of the gun click off.

Time seemed to slow.

Jenny was suddenly aware of every passing car outside, of every spec of dust in the streaming sunlight, every click of the old water pipes in that trashy building.

And she wondered when it would end.

She looked up.

Agnes looked back at her, and there was something like doubt in her eyes.

Jenny breathed out, and at the same moment, Agnes straightened.

Her resolve had returned.

And then the door burst open and Agnes stumbled back.

'Jenny!' Two all-too familiar voices cried in unison, as Nate and Carter hurled their way into the room.

Jenny gasped, tears streaming as she took in her rescuers. They looked between Agnes and her, and Agnes cocked the gun once more.

'No!' Jenny cried, before her voice was muffled by someone jumping in front of her.

At that same moment, the gun was fired.

'Are you hurt?'

Jenny faintly made out the sound of someone's voice - a familiar voice - as she roused to consciousness.

She was still in the same room, but she wasn't alone anymore. She turned, taking in the carnage all around her.

'Jenny, are you hurt?!'

The voice was more desperate this time, and Jenny finally settled on the person it belonged to. There was Nate, looking at her with such despair in his eyes that she would have wanted to launch herself at him. But she was numb all over, and when she saw what Nate's unclean hands were doing at last, she almost threw up.

Carter, in a bloody white shirt and growing paler by the second. Nate was doing his best to stop the bleeding, but there was so much red. So much.

Jenny crawled her way over.

'Nate,' she whispered, but her hands went out to Carter instead, cupping his face in both. He looked sleepily at her.

'I'm sorry,' he said weakly, as Nate worked tirelessly over him.

'Don't die,' Jenny managed in reply. 'Please, please don't die.'

There was movement in the corner.

Jenny and Nate looked up, and they both moved to cover Carter's failing body. Agnes, with wild eyes and a shaking body, a cut on her head from when she'd hit the floor after being shoved down by Nate, was holding the gun once more.

The safety clicked again.

Nate grabbed Jenny's head and pulled her down, over Carter, underneath himself.

'I love you,' he whispered into her hair.

There was a sudden scuffle, and in burst the police. Chuck and Dan were quick behind them. Agnes went immediately to the ground, the gun discarded far from her, as Dan and Chuck took in the sight before them. Dan took Jenny by the shoulders and pulled her up, but her legs gave way and she broke in front of him, tears streaming and sobs escaping one after the other.

'He can't die!' She begged as two paramedics rushed the scene, relieving Nate of his duty.

'Baizen,' Nate said, wiping his brow and leaving traces of Carter's blood there. 'I don't forgive you for any of it. So don't you dare die, you son of a bitch. Not yet. Not until you've earned it!'

Hospitals reminded Jenny of her teens. She'd spent enough time in them and enough time since, and she still like them anymore than she used to. As she walked the corridor, tugging her drip machine along with her, she hoped it wasn't too much farther to go. The lights were bright enough to make her squint, and there was always a faint buzzing wherever she went. Even in the hospitals the rich used, like this one, there was a noise.

It was past midnight.

She'd left Dan asleep in the chair beside her bed. They were waiting for their parents to arrive in the morning, and being that Jenny wasn't in the ICU, Dan had bargained to be allowed to stay the night. Somehow. Jenny thought maybe Chuck had had something to do with it, but she daren't suggest that to Dan. After all these years, she knew better.

She turned another corner, following the sign for the ICU.

She'd not expected the last few weeks to go as they did; she certainly hadn't expected to be held at gunpoint simply for the living the life she did. She never would have predicted that Carter would be working with Nate when they saved her. But she was grateful, and she supposed that, sometimes, love was stronger than hate.

Jenny passed the waiting area and her breath hitched a little. Sprawled out on numerous chairs and sofas, all dozing peacefully, were her friends. Her family. Chuck had an arm wrapped around Blair as they shared a chair, her on his lap. Serena had made up the sofa and was tucked in on herself, her chest rising and falling slowly. Nate slept on the other end of the sofa. He lay with his head back and Serena's feet across his lap. Years ago, months, even weeks, Jenny would have been jealous. Now she saw them for what they were.

Family. The best of friends. Two of her favourite people in the world. Two people who loved her, and whom she loved.

Nate stirred momentarily, as though he knew someone had been watching him, but didn't wake. Thankful, Jenny moved on. There was something she had to do before she spoke to Nate.

Someone else she had to see.

Carter slept noiselessly in his bed for twenty minutes before he was roused from sleep. Jenny felt his hand tighten around hers, and she lifted her head from where she'd been lying across her folded arms. When she met his eyes, half-awake and missing their normal spark, she couldn't help herself.

She cried.

She put his hand against her face and held it there with both of hers, crying into it.

'Hey,' he whispered. 'It's okay. It's okay…'

'It's not,' she said faintly, between sobs. 'You almost died!'

'I'm here now,' he said. 'I'm okay.'

She looked at him finally. 'What kind of an idiot jumps in front of a loaded gun?'

'One who loves you,' he said, chuckling.

She shook her head at him, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips but one she couldn't bring herself to give into. She leaned in, kissed the back of his hand.

'I hate you for what you did,' she whispered, but she squeezed his hand too.

He moved his hand to lift her chin so that she could look at him.

'Not as much as I hate myself. I had you. I had you, and I let you go.'

'Carter -'

'I can never take it back, and that will haunt me forever. And I know I'm not the one,' he paused, removing his hand from hers to brush hair from her face. 'I never was, kid.'

A tear slipped out again. Carter caught it with his fingertip, then took her hand. He brought it to his lips and Jenny relished the feel of his lips. So many times over the last months and years she'd gone to him for comfort, to feel wanted, to feel safe, to feel loved. He'd given her all those things freely. And he still was.

'I'm sorry,' she choked out.

'Don't you ever say that to me,' he told her, nestling his head further back into his pillow. 'All you ever were was perfect.'

He closed his eyes, and it startled Jenny enough to sit bolt upright. She took his face in her hands the way she had when she thought she was losing him. It felt all too real again.

'Don't you dare,' she said, and his eyes flickered open. He laughed, and so did she.

'I'm just tired,' he said, putting a hand on the back of her head and bringing it to rest on his chest.

'I was shot, don't you know? Doesn't that earn a guy some rest time?' He joked, and Jenny felt the rumble of his laugh against her cheek. She smiled.

She was glad this would be their last time together, because she knew exactly where she was going. She knew who she was going to. But even so, something didn't feel quite right. This was her saying goodbye to Carter. After everything they'd been through and all that he had done, this was their end. She felt it was only fitting to end where they had begun, all that time ago. She lifted her head, and his chest rose and fell. He was sleeping already.

Perhaps that would make it easier, she thought, as she closed the distance between their faces and pressed her lips, light as air, to his. It was hello, thank you, and it was goodbye all at once.

And Jenny was sure she'd seen someone in the doorway from the corner of her eye, but when she looked up they were gone.

She put her head back on Carter's chest, and they slept that way until dawn.

Hope you enjoyed, and I hope you understand why Jenny had to say goodbye to Carter this way. No, she isn't in love with him and she never was, but what they had was very real. And dude took a bullet for her!

Seems there's only one last ribbon to tie up, huh? One chapter left. x