A/N: Here's chapter 7, a longer a/n will be at the bottom, so I won't spoil anything here...

Christian Grey sat in John Flynn's office listening to the man he considered his friend while trying not to give into the temptation of tracking down his wife's phone for the tenth time since he arrived at Flynn's office.

Ana wasn't reacting to his text messages, e-mails or calls. She sent him one text each day to let him know she was fine otherwise it had been radio silence and he couldn't take it anymore. She had to get over what happened. He had called Elena from a burner phone to let her know they needed to stop seeing each other until Ana had calmed down and things were back to normal. He wasn't about to give up his friendship to Elena, but he would make sure to keep it even better hidden from his wife. He knew she hated Elena with a passion, but to him Elena was a good friend and she needed him.

Ever since his mother found out about the relationship her son and Elena had, she had made sure that Elena had turned into a social outcast and that her salon business went downhill, until she had no choice but to close it down. Therefore, Christian felt obligated to take care of her financially and to visit her and spend time with her, because she didn't have anyone else left in her life.

"Christian have you talked to Ana about couple's counseling?" John Flynn asked and that caught Christian's attention.

"Yes, she isn't budging, she sat up an appointment for next week with a Therapist in Bellevue. I'm sorry John, but Ana feels it is best for us to someone else."

"Well, you know I don't agree with that, but it is Ana's choice. Now, have you thought about reversing the vasectomy?" He asked fully aware of the answer he would receive.

"I'm not doing it, I would give Ana anything she wants and desires, but I can't be a father. I'm not made for it. I would fuck the child up and Ana would forever hate me… I can't risk it." Christian said and it gave John the opening to bring up what he had planned to say.

"Christian, have you thought about letting Ana go. She wants to be a mother and clearly you can't give her that, I'm not saying it is impossible for you to get over what happened as a couple, but I will be nearly impossible to rebuild her trust in you and maybe it would be in her best interest to let her go."

Christian closed his eyes and shook his head, he didn't want to hear it, didn't want to think about the one thought that was torturing him ever since the fucking Doctor forced him to confess to Ana. It was selfish of him to want to keep her in her life, but at the same time he couldn't do what was right and let her go. Only thinking about losing her… seeing her with someone else, it drove him insane and he couldn't do it.

No, she had to see that she needed him just as much as he needed her and get over wanting to have children. They would be happy with or without children… he would make sure that she would be happy and he would find a way to make her forget what happened.

"Christian, I know you don't want to hear this, but you have to consider the fact that what you and Ana want out of life is just too different… not every relationship is meant to last forever, some relationships just run their natural course and that is perfectly fine, because people do grow apart and can find happiness a second time." John continued trying to make his point.

Christian, however, had enough and got to his feet. "No! Ana is mine, she will never be with anyone but me, I can fix this… I have to." He said and walked out of John's office, just to be faced with a grim looking Luke Sawyer.

He hated that Sawyer was literally there each time he turned around. His staff was fiercely loyal towards Ana, which had become blatantly clear to him ever since their argument had happened because they were all on her side and while he understood it… it also infuriated him that his employees didn't even pretend to be on his side.

Instead, Sawyer gave him an angry, almost disgusted stare at all times, which pissed Christian off so much, he wanted to fire his ass, but he didn't go through with it because he knew Ana would never let that happen. To her, the staff was like family and no matter how many times he told her to keep things professional she wouldn't listen.

She went to have drinks after work with some of the employees of Grey Publishing, she was so close to Gail and Taylor, that he sometimes felt like living with his parents-in-law and where he was moody and distant she had a smile, hug and kind words for everyone. In some ways he envied her ability to make everyone like her in an instant, but at the same time it drove him insane, because it also meant other men noticing her and he hated it when she gave another man any attention. Hell, sometimes he wanted to punch his own brother for joking around with Ana, but when he was honest with himself, he had to admit that his wife's ability to connect with other people was one of the many things he loved about her.

Now, all he had to do was make her see that they didn't need children in their live and then everything would go back to normal…

Ana

Today is the first therapy session with Christian and I am so nervous, I actually felt like I was about to throw up any second all morning. Which thank God didn't happen, but now my nerves are kicking in again, so I asked Taylor to make a quick stop at whole foods, where I got some of their seriously delicious red velvet cupcakes in hopes that I can distract myself by allowing myself to have a treat.

Christian wasn't happy that I didn't want John to be our therapist and I know that he had Welch get a background check on Ryan Westbridge, who is the therapist Grace recommended to us. Apparently, he is very successful in helping couples work out their issues, so I hope he can help us too.

When I arrive at his office, I'm told that Christian is already there and that I can go right through. I haven't seen him since Elena-Gate and have tried not to think about him too much, because at this point it only makes me angry or sad… though to be honest, he is on my mind constantly.

Inside the office I spot Dr. Westbridge first, he is an older gentleman in his late fifties or early sixties maybe, dressed in black pants and a blue cashmere sweater. He smiles at me and I instantly like him.

"What the hell are you wearing?" Is Christian's first reaction to seeing me and I roll my eyes. I have done some more shopping in New York and with my mother in Savannah. Right now, I'm wearing black skinny jeans, flats and green off the shoulder t-shirt. My hair is piled up on top of my head and I have to say I really like the look. It's casual and comfy, but still nice enough to wear outside.

"Hello Christian, it's good to see you too." I reply with a smile that is more than forced and sit down in one of the armchairs facing Christian and the good Doctor.

"Mrs. Grey, would you mind if I call you by your first name?" Dr. Westbridge asks and I shake my head.

"No, of course, you can call me Ana."

"Good, so Ana, why don't you tell me the reason you and your husband are having issues at the moment." He says and I look at my hands to gather my thoughts for a moment.

"Well, when we got married, we agreed that we both wanted to have kids at some point in our future. About two years into our marriage I brought it up, but Christian wasn't ready. I was just twenty-four, so I let it go. As the time passed by, I wanted to have children so much, but I didn't want to pressure my husband into it, so I continued to wait for him to be ready." I stop for a moment and take a sip of the soda I brought with me.

"Anyway… about eight months ago on our fifth wedding anniversary he told me he wanted to start a family and I was so happy. I went off birth control and we tried to have a baby… or so I thought. I was devastated because even after months of trying nothing happened. I thought it was my fault and made an appointment with my Doctor to have tests done. Christian had already told me he went to see his Doctor and was fine… so I had to be my fault. Two weeks ago I was waiting for the test results when my Doctor called me and asked to have my husband present when she gives me the results. I thought for sure she had bad news... that my results came in and they were bad… only that wasn't the case, I'm perfectly capable of carrying a child… and my Doctor thought it was strange for two young, healthy people not to get pregnant, so she looked into Christian's medical file and it turns out that two years ago, when he had to go on an extended business trip, he had a vasectomy." I stop when Dr. Westbridge nearly drops his glasses and watch him look at Christian for confirmation.

"Is that true, Christian?" He finally asks and Christian nods.

"Well… I can see how this is clearly upsetting to your wife. Can you explain to me why you took such a drastic step without discussing or mentioning it to your wife?"

Christian leans forward, rest his elbows on his knees and sighs. "I'm fucked up, Dr. Westbridge… and I mean really fucked up… I have tons of issues and I cannot see myself as a father. I would probably fuck up so bad my child would end up seriously damaged and I would lose my wife because of it. I need her in my life… she is my light… before her… I don't want to go back to life as it was before her. But I knew she wanted to have children and I was scared she would go off birth control without telling me… so I had to make sure we wouldn't have children. And then I felt her pulling away from me, she became distant, so I was left with no choice but let her believe we were trying. I thought she would just give up if it wasn't happening… things weren't supposed to end like this." He says and I want slap some sense into him.

"How did you react when you found out, Ana?"

"I was upset… and angry. I was afraid I would say or do something to ruin our marriage for good, so I wanted him to stay at our penthouse in the city for a while. Just to give me some time to figure things out. Of course, he didn't take well to that and came home instead. We had an ugly fight… and he got very aggressive."

"Physically?"

"I would never hurt my wife!" Christian snaps and I gasp.

"Really, then why did I end up with a ripped dress, bruises in the shape of your hands on my arms and freaking terrified?" I snap back.

"It wasn't as bad as you make it sound!" He says and I'm not having it, so I take my phone out and look for the pictures of my bruises Grace took.

"Dr. Westbridge, this is what my arms looked like the morning after our fight happened." I say and hand him my phone.

"Well, that is clearly a problem… Christian, have you lost control like this before?" He asks and shows the phone to Christian, but he is looking anywhere but at the screen… just like when I came to Escala and he didn't even acknowledge that he left me with bruises.

"She said she wants a divorce." He mutters instead.

"No, I said I could just get a divorce and find someone else who isn't betraying my trust and is willing to have a family with me."

"Is that an option you are considering at the moment, Ana?" The Doctor wants to know.

"Well, I feel like I'm not left with many other options at this point, I can't imagine not being a mother and if Christian doesn't want to have children then maybe this is something we can't overcome… it's just… I love my husband so much… I don't trust or like him at the moment… but I still love him so much and I can't imagine being with someone else… I just don't know where to go from here."

"Can you imagine giving up on your dream of having children for Christian?" He asks and I sigh.

"I feel like I don't really have a choice if I want to fix our marriage, but… I know I will resent him for it. You have to understand, I come from a very different world… I don't enjoy being rich or having everything handed to me… those are things I had to adjust to, to be with my husband. All I ever wanted for myself was to get marry, have a small home together and two or three kids. I really just wanted a normal, boring life and I feel even though I may sound ungrateful, but I already had to make so many compromises and adjustments to be his wife that it just isn't fair for him to take that last dream I had away from me too."

"Ana can I ask you if you are happy with your life… before all of what you just told me took place?" He asks and I feel tears burn in my eyes and as they spill over I know I have to tell the truth.

"No." I whisper and hear Christian gasp.

"But… I… I don't understand, I have given you everything!" He says and I smile sadly.

"Christian, I love you… and yes, I have been happy whenever it was just us… there are so many little things… the paparazzi, all the galas and events… you giving me a publishing house to run when all I ever wanted to do was being an editor and now it's fact sheets, meetings, calculations… and I hate it, but I want to make you happy, so I go to work every day envying every editor and assistant who works for me while I continue to do work that I hate. And being with you is challenging too, because you always expect me to be perfect and I am not… the first thing you said when I came in here was some snarky comment about my clothes… but this is me, this is what I like and just so I don't upset you, I let you take over and have someone shop for me... Shit, look I really appreciate what you have done for me, I do… but I feel like sometimes I look into the mirror and don't even recognize myself anymore… it's like the girl I was when I met you just disappeared."

"Ana… I hate to break it to you, but the girl you were back then… while cute and lovely, she was a hot mess…" He says and that pisses me off.

"I was a hot mess? Are you serious? Just one question is that you or Miss Pedo speaking?" I hiss at him and he glares at me.

"Elena has nothing to do with this…"

"Oh, I believe she has everything to do with this. She is still manipulating you!" I snap and Dr. Westbridge turns to me.

"Who is Elena?"

"When Christian was fifteen he was seduced by one of his mother's friends and it wasn't just a sexual relationship, she made him her submissive for six years. When we first met, she caused some drama and his family found out about their relationship. He promised he'd cut all ties with her, sadly I had to find out a little over a week ago that that isn't true, because they have been in contact and met regularly for the last five years." I say obviously upset and Dr. Westbridge pinches the bridge of his nose.

"Christian, is that true?"

"Yes, Elena is a dear friend, she had a hard time… I need to be there for her."

"And your relationship started when you were under the age of consent?" He asks and I can literally watch as Christian's shutters come down.

"She helped me, I was a fucked up kid and it is because of her that I am where I am today." He says and actually, that offends me on behalf of his family.

"Really, did she give you a home and loving family when Ella died? Did she love you when you turned into an angry teenager? Did she pay for your education? She did nothing for you, your parents are the ones who helped you become the person you are today… all she did was to fuck you up even more. You need to wake up and see that what she has done to you was wrong, because I can promise you now that if you keep defending her, I will report her to the police and maybe once she has been convicted as a pedophile you will finally wake up and see what is happening!" I nearly scream at him, but I can't believe he is still defending her.

"You can't do that! She is my friend, why can't you see that? Why are you trying to hurt her?"

"Because she hurt you! And you can't even see it."

"Okay, I can see that this woman is a problem for your relationship and we will discuss her again. For now, however, I feel that we need to go back to what has started your problems and that is that Ana wants to have children and Christian you don't want children. Can you tell me why you told her at first you do want to have children, when your opinion about having children is so strong now?" Dr. Westbridge asks Christian.

"Because I knew." He says and looks out of the window.

"Knew what?"

"That I'm not good enough for her… but I'm selfish, I wanted her and I still want her all the same now. I had already piled so much shit on her, but I knew once I told her that I don't want children, she wouldn't marry me. You see, my wife is everything that is good. She is kind, caring… beautiful inside and out… she can make people fall in love with her just with one smile… but not even that is enough to keep me from fucking our child up… and I know if it comes to that, she would leave me, she would choose the child over me and I can't have that, I need her in my life too much to risk losing her over a child."

"Have you considered that now you might lose her because you are not giving her the child she so desperately wants?" He asks voicing my thoughts exactly.

"We can figure this out… maybe a dog or a cat or…"

"I don't want a dog or a cat… my god, what is John doing anyway… you have been seeing him for what twelve or thirteen years now? Still, you see yourself in the worst way possible." I can't believe this… how is it that he has been hiding those feelings from me all those years?

Christian remains silent so I continue. "Look, you make it seem like you are a lost cause, but you are not. You love our nieces and nephew, you love your family, you love me and I can't understand what makes you think that you couldn't love our child or mess his life up so badly that I would leave. And what hurts me the most is that you didn't talk to me, you just made a decision and went with it. We could have discussed this, we could have agreed to wait longer… but no matter what it was a decision we should have made together."

"No it wasn't. I love you, Ana, but sometimes even in a marriage it is only one person who has to make a decision. This was solely my decision and I hate that you have to live with it, but it is what it is. We can't have children and if you would just accept that we can move on and be happy again." He says and it sounds almost like he has rehearsed what he said so much that he really believes it.

"It is not that easy, sure I can just accept it and let you move in again… but then what? I don't want to question everything you say… and what's more I don't want to resent you and right now, I feel like this is what is going to happen. You are right, you can't have children… well unless you decide you want to reverse the vasectomy… but I can have children and right now, I can't envision not having children… I'm sorry Christian, but I think we have reached a point where we can't find a solution to our issues." I say and my tears start anew.

This is it, he is a guy who doesn't want to have children and I'm a girl who can't imagine not being a mother… there is no solution to fix this. One of us has to make a sacrifice and I know he is not going to reverse the vasectomy just as much as I can't give up on my dream of having a family.

I look at Christian and I know he can see the conclusion I have reached because he pales and starts to shake his head.

"NO! Ana please, don't say it… please!"

"Christian, I love you… and I know, in your own way you love me too… so please let me go. I'm not asking for a divorce, but I feel we need to legally separate for now. I need more time to myself, time to find out who I am when I'm not Ana Grey… time to think about if I can trust you again and if I can somehow find a way to be with you, give up on having children and not resent you as a result of it. You can move back into the house… I will find a new place for now… Taylor or Sawyer can follow me around… but I'm not going to have staff live with me… Maybe we should meet with your Dad to talk about a legal separation… I don't know…"

"Please Ana, don't do this, I know you won't come back to me…"

"I have to I'm sorry… we can continue to have couples therapy once a week, but I really need to be on my own for a while. I'm sorry Dr. Westbridge, but I need to leave."

And with that I get up and leave the room and I feel the same pain I felt all those years ago when I left him after he punished me in his playroom. Only this time I don't think there is a way back for us…

A/N: I know many of you will think that they haven't even touched half of their issues and of course that is true. This chapter was meant to finally make Ana do what is right and separate herself from Christian. Does she still love him? Yes, because it's not that easy for her to get over him, especially since Ana never dated before, so this is her first love, which for most women is the hardest to get over. I saw some reviews that have asked to give Christian some redeeming qualities and I would love to do so right away, but with where I'm going here, it will take a lot to get a true reaction from him or show his true self, which may doesn't make a lot of sense now, but eventually you will understand everything. One more thing I would like to address is Leila.

I don't like her and try to use her as little as possible in my stories, because Elena already is a lot to deal with, but in this story Leila has an important role later on... and not as a villain. I would have introduced a new character or had Fifty stay in touch with a different sub, but Leila with all of her own demons made the most sense... which again will make more sense later on.

And lastly... Ladies, buckle your seatbelts because there will be another bonus chapter sometime this week and it will get crazy... with most of my stories there is always that one chapter where I want to hide under a rock right after posting it and the next chapter is just that for this story so... till then let me know what you think... even if it's just to tell me that Christian is an idiot and horrible fuck up of a husband... because at this point of the story I full agree :)