A/N: I promised a light at the end of the tunnel, didn't I? Here it is, folks. Take a deep breath and prepare for the plot twist!

(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

Chapter 14

"Jess?"

He barely heard his name being called but the rapping on his bedroom door brought him round fast. Jess sat up very suddenly, startled by the piece of paper that appeared to have glued itself to his cheek. He pulled it away and replaced it on the desk just as Jimmy stuck his head into the room.

"Hey, buddy. You doing okay?"

Jess shook his head. "If I knew, I'd tell you," he admitted, trying to stretch out his body and finding it didn't come easy.

He had fallen asleep at his desk, literally face down in his essay apparently. Jess reconsidered as his eyes fell on the pages and pages of writing before him. This wasn't his paper for school, it was never supposed to be. He had started writing to clear his head, and kept on going until he had nothing left to give. That must've been when sleep overtook him, though quite honestly, Jess couldn't remember that part. He couldn't remember much of anything right now.

"What time is it?" he asked, rubbing his eyes.

"After nine," Jimmy told him, retrieving fallen pages from the carpet and staring at them. "After all the drama yesterday, we thought you kids should sleep in some. Sasha's taken Lilly out, some girl's day thing to cheer her up. I've got Danny and Marie manning the stand, so I thought I'd come talk to you."

He stopped with the talking as he started to really read the paper in his hands. When Jess realised what his dad was doing, he dragged the pages from his hands, shuffling them into a pile with others from the desk. As much as he loved Jimmy and was willing to share with him, even Jess wasn't exactly sure what all these pages contained right now, and until he had read them himself, he could use Jimmy not seeing them.

"What is all that?"

"Nothing... Everything," Jess amended, looking thoughtfully at the sheaf of papers in his hands. "It was Sash's idea. Write everything down, get it out of my head."

"Huh." Jimmy nodded. "That actually makes sense. Did it help?"

"I think I actually got a decent amount of sleep last night," Jess considered, looking up at his dad. "That's not nothing."

"Maybe tonight you could make it to the bed before that happens," said his father with a wry smile.

"Sounds like a plan," Jess agreed, filing the wad of papers away in the desk drawer. "Er, you need me to work today?"

"Not necessarily. Unless you want to?"

"Distraction would be good. I'm not saying the writing didn't help, but still."

"Okay." Jimmy nodded. "I'll look at the roster. Meantime, I've got some calls to make, unless you need me to... Er, if there's stuff you wanna talk about?"

"Not right now, but thanks." Jess smiled. "I should shower, put on some clean clothes, and then I think I owe Lilly a book."

"And a major apology." Jimmy nodded.

"That too."

Jess got up and tried not to wince when every joint he had protested. Sleeping at his desk was not a plan and he was never doing it again. Still, he did feel better for a decent amount of rest, and for getting all his thoughts and feelings out on the page.

It was strange the way events from his past and present wove into a narrative as he wrote them down. He wrote a lot of stuff about Rory, but then he got into memories from his childhood, dreams about his mother, a lot of messed up feelings that he had never dealt with. He recalled it all again as he showered, letting the water wash away the last of the pent-up tension that had been pulling on him too long. He felt better, genuinely, if not completely. Nothing was going to remove the pain of being parted from Rory, or the stress of not knowing what would happen with the maternal side of his family going forward, but it was better, easier, for now, at least.

When they got back from their day out together, Jess was glad to see both Lilly and Sasha were smiling. Of course, the look on his little sister's face took a turn when she laid eyes on him. She was still hurt by what happened and Jess couldn't blame her for that. He only hoped he could make it up to her now.

"Hey, Lil," he greeted her, rising from the chair and pulling a paper bag from a hiding spot as he came towards her.

"Hi," she said stiffly, folding her arms across her chest.

"Hey, remember what I told you," Sasha whispered to her before moving to walk away, patting Jess on the back as she went.

"Mom said I have to cut you some slack," said Lilly when he looked back at her. "You miss Rory and you're feeling weird about your mom and everything."

"That's true." Jess nodded. "But that's no excuse for the way I treated you, Lil. I'm sorry. I really am. You know I love you, sis."

She was trying to be mad at him, but it wasn't really working. A smile was breaking through before he ever got as far as the fact he loved her. Rushing forward, she threw her arms out to hug him and Jess crouched down to her level to hug her right back.

"I love you too," she promised. "And I'm sorry you're so sad about so many things right now."

"I'm not," Jess told her as they parted. "Well, I am, but I'll deal. Here, I got you something," he said then, handing her the paper bag.

Lilly's eyes lit up as she pulled out her prize - a book, obviously. Unfortunately, the smile didn't last long when she saw the title.

"I thought I should replace your copy after what I did," Jess told her. "But you're not impressed."

"I am, and thank you," she said politely. "I just... It's not going right. I can't understand why Jo and Laurie can't just be together."

Jess sighed, pulling himself back up into the chair and pulling Lilly with him. She squeezed in beside him, the offending book in her hands still.

"Lil, life doesn't always work out the way you plan. Sometimes, even when people love each other, they can't be together. It just doesn't work out."

"That's sad."

"Maybe," Jess considered. "But hey, look at it this way, if your parents had stayed together and mine had too, we wouldn't be here. You wouldn't be my kid sister, and that'd really suck," he said solemnly for all of two seconds, before a smile broke through.

"That would suck," she agreed, grinning wide. "Maybe sometimes it's better if people end up with the second person they fall in love with, like Mom and Jimmy."

"Maybe," Jess agreed, though his mind was already wandering back to Rory.

She was the first person he ever felt this way about, but she had admitted he was her second boyfriend, the first relationship having never worked out. Whether the two of them were meant to be, Jess couldn't say, though if they weren't, he had no idea how he was going to get over Rory. Right now, it felt completely impossible.

As days went, this one had been pretty good, Jess considered. He'd slept plenty last night, made things up with Lilly by lunch time, and then busied himself with work all afternoon. A few times, he caught himself smiling for real, and it felt good. Maybe there was a way to live with the pain of a heartbreak, even if you could never entirely get over it.

Returning home that evening, Jess passed by Jimmy in the kitchen and was told dinner would be a half hour. He raised his hand in acknowledged and kept on walking. Showering the grease off quickly, Jess got to his room with barely ten minutes to spare before they ate, and pulled the pages he had filled last night from the desk drawer. Dropping down onto the edge of his bed, he started skimming the text.

On and off all day, Jess had been thinking about everything he wrote down here, musing on the idea of using at least a part of it for his paper for English. Now that he started looking over it again, he realised he had something here more akin to a novel than anything else.

Jess frowned. As if he could write a book. He loved to read them, but writing one was a whole other ballgame. Still, the evidence was laid out here in his lap, pages and pages of a story that covered various parts of his life. Switch out the names, alter a few details here and there, and it could be a fairly interesting tale, he supposed.

"Jess?" Sasha called to him then.

"Be right there!" he yelled back, stuffing the pages back into his desk for now.

Running his hands back through his hair, Jess headed out for dinner. It was no particularly special meal, just the usual pasta dish that he always enjoyed, nothing fancy. Something was different though. Jimmy and Sasha were a little too quiet and even Lilly looked kind of shifty, if such a thing were possible of an innocent ten-year-old girl. Jess was about to ask what was going on when it seemed Sasha decided Jimmy should tell him, elbowing her husband in the ribs and giving him a pointed look.

"Okay," he said, laying his fork down on the edge of the plate and swallowing hard. "Um, Jess? We, er... Well, Sash and me, we had kind of a crazy idea. I don't know if you're going to go for it, and you absolutely do not have to if you don't want to, but, the thing is, we were wondering... how you'd feel about changing schools for Senior Year."

Jess frowned. "Why?"

"We thought maybe a different environment would be good for you. Different people, different atmosphere," said Sasha with a smile that was hiding something, Jess was sure of it. "Anyway, I was down at the library and I printed off some information, in case you were interested..."

Reaching over to the shelves in the corner, she retrieved some pages and laid them next to Jess' plate with a flourish. His eyes skimmed the paper and then they went very wide.

"Stars Hollow High? Stars Hollow in Connecticut?" he checked, looking up at first Jimmy then Sasha and back again.

"That's no misprint," his father told him, smiling now. "You do not have to go, Jess. This is not an us trying to get rid of you thing, no way. But I know what Rory means to you, and how you've got this need to spend time with Luke and Liz and all. So, we were thinking you could maybe finish out your schooling on the east coast, if you wanted to."

Jess had no idea how he was supposed to react to this. He wasn't sure how he wanted to react. The idea of going to school in a new place, living all the way across the country with family he barely knew, it was a little scary. On the other hand, he would be with Rory, every day. He could get to know Luke, he could meet his mother. It wasn't as if he would be leaving a whole bunch of friends here. There were few people he was close to, except for the three sat here around the table.

"I don't... I have no idea what to say."

"We know it's a big decision, honey," said Sasha, her hand covering his on the table. "And you don't have to know what you want to do right now. Although, we are on limited time to get your transcripts in order before school starts."

"Deadline is pretty much forty-eight hours from now," Jimmy explained. "Which I know is not much notice, but there's really nothing we can do about that."

"I get it." Jess nodded. "I'm just... processing," he said, staring at the paperwork about Stars Hollow High without really seeing it.

"We talked to Luke," Sasha explained. "He has an apartment over the diner that he's happy for you to stay in. He used to live there, but obviously he moved in with Lorelai and Rory a while back. It'd be awkward for you to live at the house with them in the circumstances, but you can eat there and everything, and just use the diner apartment to sleep in."

"And Liz doesn't know anything about this yet," said Jimmy then, picking up where Sasha had left off. "We didn't think it was fair to get her hopes up or to have her start making decisions that ought to be yours. This is all on you, man. Totally your choice."

"Thanks," Jess muttered, though he was barely hearing any more than he was seeing.

His mind was whirring with possibilities and consequences both. He could do this. He could spend Senior Year in Connecticut with Rory, with Luke and Liz. He'd get to see where he was born, where he might have been raised in different circumstances. Stars Hollow. New York. All kinds of places.

And Rory would be there.

"I'll miss you," said Lilly then, her little voice cutting through everything. "But I just want you to be happy."

There were tears in her eyes as Jess looked at her and it broke his heart. At the same time, he knew he couldn't base this whole decision on her, or on Jimmy or Sasha, not even on Rory. Jess had to make this call, based on all the facts, based on what he was feeling and what he really wanted to do. If only he could absolutely sure what that was, he would be just fine.

To Be Continued...