A/N: That last chapter was strange to write. I never did anything like that before, but hey, y'all seemed to like how it turned out, so yay! :) That gives me confidence for my next awkward chapter...

(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

Chapter 18

"So, how'd it go?"

Jess had been waiting for the question from Luke since before he ever got back to the diner. He was only grateful his uncle didn't start with him downstairs, but instead followed him up to the apartment to ask. There was no way he was prepared to share the details of meeting his mother with the whole of Stars Hollow. He wasn't exactly sure that he wanted to repeat the whole story even to Luke.

"It was... intense," he said, rubbing a hand over his face. "Weird, good, bad, awkward, scary, a relief even, but mostly, just intense."

Luke nodded like he understood, and Jess supposed he was at least trying to. That was all his uncle could do right now, since he couldn't possibly know what it was like to be in this situation. Meeting a mother that you never knew after eighteen years of wondering. It wouldn't make a whole lot of sense to most people, no matter how much they tried to understand.

"But you, er... you and Liz, you got along?"

"Yeah, we did." Jess nodded, finding a half a smile for his uncle. "I mean, we're not exactly going to be holding hands and skipping around town or anything."

"That would be disturbing," Luke noted, making Jess smile all the more, despite how serious this conversation ought to be.

"I can't just act like she's my mom, y'know? I don't know her. We talked, shared some stories. I may have got mad at her for some stuff too."

He looked away when he said it, unsure how Luke would react to the news. Jess wasn't afraid of his uncle, not at all, but he didn't know him too well yet. The whole moving here for a year situation hinged on Luke's co-operation, so pissing him off wasn't exactly a great idea. Jess was still learning what did and didn't bother the uncle he had known for such a short time.

"Hey, I'm not going to say you shouldn't be mad at her," said Luke, hands raised in mock-surrender. "Liz's behaviour wasn't exactly great around the time you were born. For all that I could hate Jimmy for taking you away, I can't pretend I don't understand at least a little why he did it."

Jess nodded his head, knowing Luke spoke the truth. He said something similar back in California when they met up to get acquainted. It still got to Luke that he wasn't able to be a part of Jess' life from the start, but there was nobody with a brain that couldn't understand why Jimmy took his son out of that situation. There were some regrettable actions on both sides, Jess knew that, but personally, he couldn't be sorry about how things turned out. He had a decent childhood, a good life with Jimmy, and later with Sasha and Lilly too. Maybe he could've had something just as good here with both of his parents, an uncle, and a grandfather, but there was no way to know that for sure, and no use wondering on it too much.

"Er, we're gonna keep in touch," said Jess then. "Liz and me, we exchanged numbers. She said she'd love to show me New York sometime."

"That's great." Luke smiled. "You know, she's had a rocky past, we all know that, but things are better now. She really turned her life around. I'm not saying she'll ever be the perfect mother, or the perfect sister," he admitted, "but she's in a place where she can at least try now.."

"I know." Jess nodded, unwilling to say any more.

Honestly, he was still processing a lot of what had happened with Liz, what she had told him about her life, how she had reacted to his own stories. As a woman he just met, a stranger to become acquainted with, Liz was okay, nice enough and everything. Jess was having a hard time putting her into the 'mom' category in his head though, not least because it felt like a weird sort of betrayal.

"Anyway, I should get back downstairs," said Luke, turning to the door. "You wanna come down and eat? Or I could bring something up..."

"I'm good, thanks," Jess insisted. "I could actually use a little time by myself."

"Oh, sure, sure." Luke nodded his understanding and made a hasty exit, closing the door behind him.

Alone at last, Jess dropped back onto his bed and covered his face with his hands. Two days and he wasn't sure what he was doing here. The larger part of him wished he had never left California. Venice was home, the only steady, stable, long-term place that ever had felt like he belonged. Stars Hollow sure didn't compare, though he doubted it was the fault of the odd little town itself, more that it didn't contain the people that Jess held most dear.

Reaching for his cell, Jess stared down at the phone lying there in his hand and sighed. He couldn't call, it would cost an absolute fortune, especially by cell. If he used the land line, that would also be extortionate, but he could probably pay Luke back later. It would be a little cheaper, he supposed.

"Screw it," muttered Jess, reaching for the rotary phone on the table and dialling in all the necessary codes and numbers.

He waited with the handset pressed to his face, suddenly remembering the time difference and making calculations in his head. It was pretty late on a Saturday in Connecticut but would be early back home. Sasha and Lilly might well be home, though Jimmy could easily be out at Dante's already. Jess hoped not, and felt he must have wished hard enough when a male voice answered all the ringing in his ear.

"Hey, Dad."

He didn't use the word much, knowing that doing so now would prove to Jimmy just how much he needed to hear his voice without him ever having to admit it.

"Jess. How's it going son?"

"It's going," Jess told him. "I... I just met Liz."

"Wow. Okay," said Jimmy, clearly unsure how to continue. "How'd that go?"

"It was... I don't know, man. It was weird. I mean, she's my mother, but I can't... I could've passed her in the street and I wouldn't even have known about it."

"Jess, buddy. I'm sor-"

"No, I don't want you to be sorry. I didn't call to have you say you're sorry," he assured his father. "I just needed to... How's everything there?"

It was strange that given how close they had always been, Jess couldn't just tell Jimmy that he missed him, that he just needed to hear his voice right now. He guessed that was the way it was with fathers and sons. No doubt Sash could explain it with talk of energy fields or hormones or something else that would make Jess roll his eyes, even as he thought how cool it was that he could just make sense of everything like that.

"Everything's fine. Well, not fine, because... Well, it sure is weird not having you here, Jess."

"It's weird not being there."

There was a long pause after their admissions had been spoken. Jess was sure Jimmy was as stuck for something else to say as he was. Part of him wanted his father to offer him the chance to change his mind and come home, and yet Jess knew that if he did, he wouldn't accept. He had to see this through, not least so he could be with Rory and get to know Luke. He wasn't going to get a chance like this just handed to him twice.

"Er, Sasha and Lily headed out early, they had some errands to run. They'll be sorry they missed your call," said Jimmy then.

"I'm sorry too," replied Jess. "I really didn't think about the time until after I dialled. Tell them I said 'hi', and... and tell Sash, what I said to her before I left, it's still true."

Jess wasn't really surprised that Jimmy never asked what exactly he was referring to with those words. Though he doubted that Sasha had told Jimmy about their talk, about her being his mother no matter what happened with Liz, Jess figured Jimmy could guess. He also figured he wouldn't exactly be mad about it.

"I'll tell them," Jimmy promised.

"Thanks. Anyway, I should go. This call is probably costing more than my flight. I'll see you soon, Jimmy."

"We'll see you, Jess. Take care of yourself."

"You too."

They hung up then, and Jess spent a long time just staring at the phone. Swallowing hard he told himself he was going to be an adult about all of this. He was eighteen years old, damnit, and he was not going to sit up here hiding, crying like a little girl just because he met his mother today and was missing his family a little bit.

"Pull yourself together already," he told himself, getting up from the bed and heading for the bathroom.

He needed a shower. Jess couldn't get the smell of Liz's perfume out of his nose, and it was really starting to get to him. Clearly, she had over-done it in her effort to seem like the perfect mother figure. It was never going to happen, because Jess suspected she just was not cut out for such a role. Certainly, dousing herself in whatever the hell he could still smell hadn't helped improve her.

When he was cleaned up and in a fresh set of clothes, Jess looked towards the door and pondered his next move. He could head downstairs, get some food, mix with the locals. He might even offer to help out in the diner, earn the cash to pay off the phone bill he was sure to have run up already, and would no doubt be adding to over the next few weeks and months. None of those things appealed, and his eyes went back to the phone by his bed.

Shaking his head, Jess reached for his cell instead and hammered out a text message as fast as he could. The reply came through within seconds and he smiled, shoving the phone back into his pocket and hurrying out the door. Rushing through the diner, he barely glanced at Luke as he told him he was headed out but he would be back in a couple of hours. He doubted his uncle would've argued with him even if he felt able.

As it was, he only told Jess not to get lost out there. Jess doubted that was even possible. From the tour Rory gave him, he was already pretty sure that if you made three lefts in Stars Hollow you ended up right back where you started, via a variety of stores that all seemed to sell ceramic unicorns, for no good reason he could come up with.

Not that Jess was headed in the direction of any stores on this particular walk. He had a better destination in mind and actually made it there before she did. He was sat in the middle of the bridge, legs dangling down towards the water, when Rory walked up to join him. Jess glanced up just briefly, waited for her to sit down close beside him, and then reached to take her hand in his own. He didn't say a word. Now she was here, he really didn't know where to begin. He only knew he wanted her close right now, that was all.

"So," said Rory after a while, "you met your mom."

"I met Liz," he said pointedly, making sure not to snap at her mistake.

What she said was true after all, Jess knew that, but he just couldn't have the word 'mom' applied to that woman. She was Liz, and she was an okay person and all, but she wasn't 'mom'. He seriously doubted she ever would be in his eyes, no matter what biology had to say about it.

"It was okay, right? I mean, there was no broken furniture or anything at our house, so..."

"It was okay," Jess agreed, swallowing hard. "It was fine."

It was unfair not to give her more to go on than that, to let her sit there wondering what was wrong, but Jess couldn't help it. He wanted to tell Rory everything. He almost wished he had her there at the meeting so he wouldn't need to repeat it all, so she would just know and understand. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. If he didn't tell her, she couldn't know, and yet Jess hadn't the words, not right now.

He barely knew he was crying until he heard Rory gasp, her free hand reaching out to his cheek and turning his head to look at her. She looked almost as pained as Jess felt, and when she put her arms around him to pull him close, he let her.

It seemed like such a stupid thing to cry about, meeting your mother, but Jess couldn't help it. Maybe some of this was just as much about leaving home for a year as it was about Liz, he honestly didn't know. All that was certain was that he couldn't help how he felt, or the tears that came freely and silently down his cheeks right now.

"Oh, Jess," said Rory, holding on tight. "I wish I could say something to make it better."

"It's fine," he promised her, pulling himself together after a minute or two. "Seriously, I'm good," he said, sniffing hard, dragging the back of his hand over his face as they parted. "Geez, first day this has happened in around ten years, and it happens twice. What the hell is Connecticut doing to me?"

It was supposed to come out like a joke, but Jess knew it hadn't landed so well when he saw the look on Rory's face. Probably didn't go down too well with her that he was suggesting he didn't want to be here, even in jest.

"Hey, I'm not sorry I came," he promised her then. "I'm not. I had to come, I had to meet Liz and get to know Luke, and... and I had to see you again," he said definitely, gripping her hand in his once again and making her meet his eyes. "Rory, it was worth it. It's all worth it. Especially you."

She nodded that she understood, looking as fit to cry now as he had himself moments before, though maybe for happier reasons than Jess had.

"For what it's worth, I'm really, really happy you're here," she promised him, leaning in closer.

"Me too," he assured her, closing the final gap between them.

As they sat there, kissing like their lives depended on it, it was easy to forget all the problems that came with Jess' trip to Stars Hollow. Nothing Rory did was going to make him stop missing his family or make him feel any closer to Liz. Still, the worst was over with regards to meeting his biological mother, and Jess didn't hate getting to know Luke, or knowing that he could be this close to Rory every day for the foreseeable.

"I love you, Ror," he told her when they parted. "Everything else is pretty screwed up in my head right now, but that part I'm sure about."

"Me too," she promised him. "It doesn't make any sense. I mean, a couple of months ago, I hadn't even met you, but I'm glad I did, Jess. I know I love you, and I am so happy that you're here."

They kissed once more before they parted ways, Jess heading back to the diner with a smile on his face that he certainly hadn't been wearing when he left. He felt a few pounds lighter as he reached the door, knocking for entry since Luke had closed up by now and was clearly determined not to have any more customers.

"Hey, you okay?" he asked, letting Jess inside.

"Yes, I'm okay," his nephew assured him, meaning every word this time. "Goodnight, Uncle Luke," he said, heading for the stairs.

"Goodnight, Jess," he heard behind him.

Maybe this wasn't home, but perhaps it could be as good as, for a while at least.

To Be Continued...