A/N: I've been wanting to write this one for awhile but I struggled coming up with a plausible, believable Original Character to act out as Sarah- Donna's older half sister. I wanted her anger and resentment for Donna to be realistic so apologies in advance if Donna seems lashed out on too much or more snappy than usual. I've written their sibling dynamic before but that was more Donna's pov than this fic, if you're interested in reading that it is called 'Estranged Family Ties'. I also touched on their dynamic in Ch.13 of this fic "Dad's Little Girl"
Lastly it was lowkey a struggle to not make this extra angsty through donna or harvey's pov which I would've loved to explore but that would defeat the main purpose of this multi-fic lol- so this fic is more of a glimpse of what I'm sure is a muli-layered complex dynamic between the Pauslen Sisters. I kind of already want to take this fic down but figured onwards and upwards.
Really hope its not toooo out of pocket behavior for the Suits characters!
Please let me know your thoughts in the reviews and as always critiques and comments are always welcome Xxx
Twisted Half-Sisters
Sarah sighed, wondering if perhaps she should've stuck to her main plan of skipping out on the family festivities this year. It was no secret that she and her half-sister, Donna, don't get along. It always irked Sarah how Donna managed to paint herself as the victim, when it was clear as day that she was the privileged one between the two of them. It was bad enough she got their dad at his prime- Married, happy, rich and successful in the big mansion house in Connecticut, when Sarah got to enjoy him on the weekends at her grandparents house as her mom struggled to finish college through night classes. Donna grew up in a two parent household with not just financial security but lavishness, and warmth and a clear example of what a healthy relationship is.
Sarah grew up in her grandparents house for the first ten years of her life, till her mom graduated from college and eventually got her long term job as a hotel manager, moving them from the grandparents house to a condo-home that Sarah's mom proudly rented then eventually owned.
Her relationship with her dad wasn't the greatest, he was a young dad, a teenager first and foremost, who felt like a fun babysitter who visited on the weekends and holidays and tried his best- visited as much as he could- till his own life got in the way, and eventually, Clara.
Sarah was of course envious of her dad's second family - his first real attempt at one. She couldn't help but feel like the lousy first pancake you threw away because it wasn't perfect at the first try. She was a mistake born from a late night study session at the ripe age of sixteen, and she held no real grudge towards either her mom or her dad for their defunct relationship. Over time, with the added distance from her dad and his perfect Paulsen family, she managed to build a better relationship with her dad, even Clara.
However her resentment over the years for certain hardships popped up in different ways- mainly against Donna. They clashed heads aggressively from petty fights over their dad's attention at a young age, to bigger things like money, emotional resentment, their life-choices, and most recently, Donna's snap-quick marriage to her ex-boss. But still, Sarah loved her dad and loving him meant dealing with his wife- who she truly liked- and their daughter- who she did not.
That is how Sarah found herself at this year's early christmas lunch get-together at Jim and Clara's house. Sitting across from Donna and her boytoy, Jim on her left, at the head of the table with Clara on the right. The lunch had been… stilted, a few jabs between the siblings. A comment on Donna's aging pale face, a snide throwaway about Sarah's newly platinum hair.
But pleasant conversation overall, a few genuine laughs shared between the new addition to the family and a more than friendly Clara. A happy Jim for having his two daughters under the same roof, and an annoyingly charming Harvey with a love-eyed Donna.
It irked Sarah, just a little, when she asked how her and Harvey began dating, and the timeline of their relationship. Harvey's permanent small smile as she gave a rundown of their relationship status, Donna's hand reaching out to squeeze his, her sapphire ring glistening brightly in the dining room.
Sarah scoffed at the end of Donna's story. She saw her half sister's fingers clenched tightly against Harvey's.
"Something to say Sarah?"
"I just think it's funny you've judged me all these years for my quick love life when you started out this year single, as always, then dating some designer guy Clara said you didn't shut up about- to miraculously engaged and then married all before the new year was out, to another guy." Sarah smugly replied before taking a long sip of wine, staring demurely at Donna's clenched jaw and narrowed eyes.
Donna quickly fixed her reaction, twisting her lips into an insincere smile. "I've never judged you for how fast your love life was. Just how manipulated it was, that's all." Her voice was sarcastically sweet at the end.
Harvey- her half brother in-law, Sarah supposed, sputtered as he coughed on a sip next to his wife.
"Well at least I didn't manipulate my boss to-" Donna's eyes widened in rage as Sarah ramped up close to the finish line of the accusation that her sister was whoring herself out for her new COO title she miraculously got without a degree.
"Sarah!" Both parents loudly chided as Harvey clenched his fist in response, "Do not go there." he growled, his voice mimicking Batman's and Sarah wasn't sure who she liked riling up more her sister or new brother. He'd been pretty docile up until now, letting Donna fight her own battles while he schmoozed his new in-laws. She could see his neck muscles pulsing in restraint as he tried not to retaliate, presumably for the sake of his wife and her love for her family.
Sarah was interrupted from responding by her daughter running up to their table, the one Paulsen who managed to avoid the unpleasantness of the day by hiding out in the guest bedroom, talking to her dad on the phone who was out of town for the holidays. "Mom can I go see the Rollenstein's new dog?" Darcy asked excitedly, pleading with her blue eyes at her mother. Sarah sighed, hesitating at first about whether she'd prefer her daughter avoiding the family drama or having her there as a buffer.
One look at Darcy keenly taken by whoever she was texting, presumably a Rollenstein, and seeing her smile for the first time in days sealed the deal for her.
"Sure baby." Sarah agreed with a quick brush on Darcy's shoulder, squeezing her arm before kissing her cheek in a quick goodbye.
"Thanks!" She rushed away in a haze, not knowing she'd just interrupted one of the more terse, Paulsen Christmas lunches.
Jim shuffled around in his seat before speaking up, breaking the tension in the air. "Teenagers huh? Can't keep 'em in one place too long." he unhelpfully added.
"You'll have to excuse her Harvey, she's an only child who's 12 and easily bored with us old people. The Rollenstein's have kids and dogs she could have fun with." Clara helpfully added, always quick to diffuse the awkward situation.
Harvey hesitated, clearly unsure of what to say next. He took a glance to his right at Donna, and Sarah wanted to roll her eyes at how he had to look to her to decide on anything.
And she's the manipulative one?
Donna was no help to him, still fuming at Sarah's earlier comment, clenched jaw and eye sight boring into her plate, finally not moon-eyeing her new husband.
"It's alright, I get it, I have a teenage niece too. Around Darcy's age."
"You know Darcy is going to ask why her aunt's not there on Christmas morning." Sarah bitterly threw out, wanting to throw in one more jab at her sister. That snapped her out of her silent rage- whipping her head so fast to meet Sarah's gaze it gave her whiplash.
"I already talked to Darcy and she said she understood why I wouldn't be there. You know it is just like you to use her against-"
"Use her?! She's my daughter, whatever I do with her is up to me- as her mother."
"Well her mother is a real-"
"Can we please shelf this conversation- maybe for never?" Jim intervened trying to buffer the situation, pleading brown eyes darting to both daughters.
It was a miracle they'd lasted this long without a blowout. Sarah let out a breath as she tried to remind herself frowning worked against the botox she'd invested in.
"So.. Harvey," Sarah asked with a faked keen interest. "You've been working with Donna for almost 15 years! Any one particular thing that kept you an arms length away from her?"
"Sarah so help me god-" Donna huffed as her right arm clenched her fork, scraping it against her chicken terrain.
"What? I can think of a few reasons he'd want to keep your relationship… simply professional. Well, more than a few."
"How's husband number 4 by the way? What was his name again, Lyle, Kyle-"
"Brian." Sarah snapped back in response, rolling her eyes at her sister's lame comeback.
Harvey seemed to hide a snicker under a cough, before glancing at Clara hesitantly, seemingly his new redheaded- lifesaver. Clara simply shook her head. "Girls please change the subject, if not for me then for the sake of the elf on the shelf watching you two." Clara teased as she took a sip of wine, pointing at the elf on the shelf that the Paulsen's had coyly placed on the book shelf behind them.
"Sure, let's stick to lighter subjects. So you're COO now, Donna, does that position really put to good use that B.A. you got from Yale?" Sarah asked sarcastically, still needing to reel her anger somewhere.
"Oh, like your degree in political science is so handy as you sell real estate?"
Clara sighed, clanking her fork down on her plate. "So much for lighter subject-matter."she mumbled under her breath.
"At least my degree didn't cost an arm and a leg for this family."
"Now Sarah-" Jim warned from his seat, holding up his palm in annoyance.
"You're one to talk! I took out loans, applied for scholarships, barely accepted any financial help from them- while you traipse around Florida with your flavor of the month in toe, ignoring the fact Dad's business went bankrupt!"
Harvey's gaze shifted in surprise at Donna, clearly learning new information at the moment.
"What did you want me to do- send him money? As if Dad would've accepted it!"
"You weren't even there for him- for any of us through any of it!"
"It's not like we were the Brady bunch before." Sarah sarcastically quipped as she tossed a few lettuce leaves with her fork, irritated at the mention of her distancing herself from the family when the distance was already there before their financial distress.
"Enough!" Clara yelled, her palms slapping the table forcefully, jolting everyone else in surprised silence.
"The both of you are acting like children! Bringing up ancient history just to yell and hurt one another! Sarah, bringing Darcy into the mess between you two was a step too far and you know it. Donna that trust fund money was for her to live her life, and we've already discussed to death the issue that happened years ago."
"Well I'm sorry, but she shouldn't have accepted the invitation if she knew she was going to be a bitch at lunch!" Donna snapped, sick of her parents defending Sarah's actions.
"I'm not being a bitch!" Harvey scoffed at her response, and Sarah rolled her eyes at him.
"I just don't understand why we're painting everything in shades of roses when this pairing is practically an op-ed in the New York Times, waiting to be written."
"You don't even know anything about us!" Harvey snapped back, clearly done with trying to keep the peace.
"Oh please, I've heard second-hand stories from dad, I know your type, hell I've divorced half your kind."
"Sarah, honestly Harvey's decent. He's not the prodigal son or anything, but he loves Donna and that's all that matters." Jim calmly intervened, hoping to smooth things over.
"Does he? How do we know she's not just some emotionally abused victim to his staturing power in the law firm."
"So I went from the calculating mastermind to the damsel in distress in this relationship? I don't know whether to swoon over your concern or be offended by your lack of belief in me." Donna let out a dry laugh, clearly unamused with this development.
"Well I'm sorry if I'm not swooning over Mr. Specter-Paulsen over there who's apparently done nothing but run your law firm down the ground and toy with your feelings while you were his subordinate for fifteen years!"
"Why does everyone in your family insist on hating me in first impressions?" Harvey mumbled under his breath as he heaved out a sigh.
Donna ignored her husband's words as she seemed genuinely shocked at her sister's, baffled for the first time all day. She opened up her mouth and closed it twice before speaking up.
"Are you actually concerned for me right now?"
Sarah scoffed in response. "Oh please- I- I-" Sarah looked flustered, something she rarely is as she searched for the right words. "I was simply pointing out that you have terrible taste in men too. Falling in love with your boss has got to be the worst choice you've ever made. And I've met that dimwit you dated Mark before so that is saying something."
Donna rolled her eyes at her sister's words, but a begrudging smile made its way on her face as she seemed to catch onto Sarah's train of thought.
"Well it definitely wasn't the smartest move I've made."
"Hey!" Harvey looked at his wife- faking an annoyed impression but clearly amused with the turn-around of the conversation. Sarah could see the relief in his eyes they'd returned to more generic sibling rivalry.
"It may not have been the smartest choice but I don't regret it for one second. Because it got us here." Donna lovingly responded back to her husband, with a fond eye roll and quick caress of his stubbly cheek.
Harvey grinned boyishly at her, smug at her response. "Stronger than ever." He quipped back, waggling his eyebrows at Sarah in retaliation.
"Oh barf." Sarah gagged at the picture of domesticity in front of her, a pang of jealousy making its way into her chest.
Donna glanced slyly at Sarah, hazel eyes meeting brown, both of them silently communicating in a way only sisters ever really could. An understanding passed between them as they both waved the metaphorical white flag. Harvey was an ok guy, and Sarah could see that his influence on her sister couldn't have been for the worse, when she'd never seen her more content, happy, and loved.
Sarah may not like her sister, but that didn't mean she didn't want what's best for her. They had a rocky relationship, a long distance one that reared its ugly head on more than one occasion with fostered bitterness that may never go away between them especially because it seemed like neither was bothered by the bitterness taking up space between them in the first place.
No Sarah may never like her sister, she may never really understand her, and she may even despise her just a little.
But they were still family.
Harvey and Donna shared a quick look between one another, another silent communication between two. Sarah looked at them with a new light as Donna squeezed his palm knowingly, grateful for his presence, and Harvey sent her a look that seemed to convey reassurance.
Sarah looked back at Harvey's presence throughout their lunch as Harvey seemed to softly ask Donna if she was ok with a quirk of his brow, and she responded with a short nod. She saw how he had a glint in his eye, a curiosity that he wasn't ignoring but rather holding onto waiting for perhaps a more private moment to unleash on Donna the myriad of questions the lunch may have brought up. She saw Donna cock her head to the side with a soft shake conveying she was aware of his state of mind, and that they'd deal with it later. He gave her palm another reassuring squeeze before finally breaking eye-contact with his wife and going back to his plate of food.
Sarah realized she had never seen two people communicate so loudly and seamlessly after an altercation of sorts. Harvey had seemed non-pulsed at first, seeing his wife snip and jibe her half-sister, clearly aware of the harboured dislike the Paulsen sisters had, but then he seemed shocked and frazzled by how far it went, by the apparent new information he'd just learned by his so called partner in life of over 15 years. How he managed to put Donna first, put her needs on top of his, letting their family dynamic play out, putting a pin on something he clearly needed to discuss with her- it amazed Sarah. She'd never had that with any of her husbands, a clear partnership based on trust and equality. Sarah imagined it must've always been like that between them to a certain extent- because Donna may have been his employee and Harvey may have been her boss for a decade or so- but their shared trust and bond did not happen overnight within barely a year of their relationship.
The proof played out in front of Sarah, through the dynamic the two shared.
There Harvey was, a clearly narcissistic man used to winning big and acting like a suave alpha taking the comments Sarah made on the chin, trusting Donna by letting her and Sarah hash out their issues, while he and Jim exchanged sports talk, while he complimented Clara on her dishes, while he teased Donna how she inherited little to no cooking skills her mom clearly had.
Sarah wasn't expecting a man of Harvey's stature to catch on so quickly to their family dynamic, to bend a knee and acclimate. To play offense and defense and know when to turn on the charm and deflect, or when to turn sincere and show his cards a bit more for the sake of his wife.
He wasn't like the men Sarah was used to. He had a backbone, he wasn't easily swayed by the Paulsen charm, had his own amount of charismatic skills at his disposal, and he was smart enough to know when to press and when to let things go. He may be the perfect match for Donna, who Sarah knew, was a master manipulator just like her. Donna liked to call it acting, but Sarah had seen her in action before, and she knew most men- most people- didn't bat an eye at her technique. It was surprisingly refreshing to see a man challenge her.
"Brian and I are separating." Sarah announced loudly, breaking the one minute of peace the table had shared.
"Oh dear." Jim sighed as Clara added "Dear god not again, sweety."
Harvey snickered at the abrupt turn-around, and Donna slapped his shoulder for laughing.
Clara sent Sarah a knowing look, sympathetic and churning with understanding as she realized why exactly Sarah was so taken aback by her half-sister's love-life.
Sometimes, Sarah hated how emotionally adept they all were.
"You lasted longer than expected!" Donna sarcastically quipped.
"Yeah, we were expecting you to dump him his sorry a-butt awhile ago." Harvey joined in on the ribbing as he spoke around a mouthful of chicken terrain, surprising Sarah by the notion that Harvey and Donna spoke about her love life.
"Well, it's just a separation trial we're going to try and make it work after some serious ashwagandha retreats are lined up. He needs to change if we're going to last."
"Ever think you might be the thing that needs to change in the relationship? You are the common denominator after all." Donna's words were song-like as her eyes twinkled in mischief across to her sister.
Sarah smiled close-lipped at her, her right eye wincing as she struggled not to snap back.
"Hey if she figured out Mark was a dud there's hope for her after all." Harvey chimed in to Sarah's rescue, a call-back to her hatred for Donna's pathetic excuse for an ex.
"Hmm, maybe you are smart after all." Sarah winked at her brother-in-law, who chucked in reply.
"The minute we're done with all the Christmas hoopla me and you are going for a nice wine-in girls night while your father babysits Darcy." Clara declared as she reached her hand out for Sarah to hold onto.
Sarah thanked her as she looked back at Jim. "She'd love that, you know. Ever since Tad's been out of the picture, and now Brian moving out of the house for three days a week I'm worried she doesn't have a strong enough male influence in her life."
"What does she need that for, she's got me- I'm manly enough." Jim puffed out his round chest jokingly, jutting out his chins and flexing his arms.
Sarah laughed at his pose.
"I know we barely know each other, but it seems like you've got it covered on both-ends. I've been around enough Paulsen-women to realize their presence more than makes up for a lack of testosterone." Harvey helpfully added to the conversation, sincerity ringing in his tone.
"Wow, she's got you trained well." Sarah thought out-loud, but the comment was met with amusement as Donna rolled her eyes while Harvey and the parents chuckled at her comment, well-aware of the irony and truth in the statement.
"Besides, she just got a new uncle- who has more pent-up testosterone to make up for three males, if she ever needs anything, have her give me a call."
Sarah smirked at Donna's olive branch, secretly appreciative that despite how little time Sarah and Donna spent together, Dacry had a semi-nurturing bond with her aunt, although, truth be told it could be better.
"I'll let her know there's some weekends in Seattle to look forward to when she gets sick of me."
"So all the time?" Donna gleamed and Sarah sighed. "I walked right into that one."
All in all, Sarah ended up having a tolerable Christmas lunch at her dad's house. Maybe in a few months she'll muster up the courage to stomach her half sister for a few hours and actually make it to her Dad's birthday gathering this year.