"So you say that this is how you got here?"
Dipper, Pacifica, Luz, Eda, and King were all in the woods outside Bonesburrough, standing before a random door just standing there.
Luz went around to the other side of the door. "I don't see anyone on this side. No insignias or cracks or anything. It's just… normal."
Eda put her hand on it. "The wood feels normal too." She opened it and nothing happened. "Maybe it requires a specific key or a secret knock?"
"Like this?" Luz asked, then did the shave and a haircut rhythm. But nothing happened.
Pacifica rolled her eyes. "That's the most obvious secret knock in the world."
"Well, whatever the case, it's not working for us. But someone must know about it if it's not that far away from town." Eda commented. "I think for now we leave it alone but keep an eye on it. If someone else comes by, I know a spell that can reveal the most recent footprints and where they go. Right now it should just show ours so that's not helpful."
"Do you think someone bad could be behind this Eda?" Luz asked.
"In my experience, you should always suspect whoever is behind something you don't understand has less than pure motives. It's very rare that you encounter something mysterious and the one responsible is just being generous in a weird way."
Dipper nodded. "Yeah I have to agree. My uncle did do something secretive but good, but there were people like Gideon who were just hiding their own selfishness."
"If you say so." Eda replied, not getting the references. "So kids, if you want to learn more about magic, I know a place to help give you a demonstration. But first, I should give you some basics."
Dipper and Luz nodded with enthusiasm, the former taking out his journal ready to take notes. Pacifica was interested but didn't act as excited as the other two.
"Okay, the spells we use can be divided into ten categories, though most people only think of the nine big ones. The tenth one is general magic, which is basically the spells that don't fall into any specific category and can be used by anyone.
"Hey Eda, you said there were nine big categories. Are those the same as the nine tracks in Hexside?" Luz asked.
Eda nodded. "Bingo girl. Okay, so we can get Dipper and Pacifica up to speed, we have a school here in Bonesburrough called Hexside. Luz snuck inside a few days before you arrived and posed as a student's project."
Dipper and Pacifica turned to the Hispanic girl who just laughed sheepishly.
"Anyway, the students there are put into nine tracks, which each revolve around one of the nine specialties of magic. Each student is taught how to use that one particular specialty in its various ways. Though personally if you ask me it's just conditioning for coven recruitment."
"Ooh, how do covens work here?" Luz asked, intrigued.
"Later kid, let's get the other two caught up first." Eda insisted. "Okay, so the first kind of magic is Animation. This is the ability to give motion to the motionless, making it move and obey commands. Many here specialize in using this to create abominations."
"Oh, like Amity?" Luz asked.
Eda nodded. "The magic used to create an abomination can apply to other things, like tools, to make doing work easier. It can also be applied to wagons if you don't have a steed to pull it, or making heavy objects easier to move around."
"So it's basically magic that moves things?" Dipper summarized.
"In a word, yes." Eda agreed. "The second kind of magic is Herbcraft, also known as plant magic. Like Animation, you're moving something that otherwise can't move, but this time you're doing it to something already alive. Do it right and you can use plants like others use abominations. An extra perk is part of this magic is getting a strong tolerance to poisons, so I'd recommend all three of you to learn some so you can handle the food here better."
"Considering the food I've seen, that sounds like a good idea." Pacifica noted.
"Which brings me to the third kind of magic, Beastcraft. As you can guess, that's animal magic. Basically it's just like plant magic, except you apply it to animals. But there is a difference. If you're good at it, you can talk to animals and even partially become an animal yourself. Not exactly my favorite, but yes there is some poison immunity to be gained, so we'll get you three on that one too."
"Speaking of becoming an animal, the fourth kind of magic is Edificer. This is the ability to transform someone from one thing into another, or reshaping it into a more desired form." Eda continued.
"Wait, you mean alchemy?" Dipper asked.
"Owl-ke-what?" The gray-haired witch asked, tilting her head. "What are you talking about?"
"You don't know what alchemy is?" Dipper asked, not expecting confusion from the magic expert.
She shook her head. "Not a clue. Anyway, Edificer magic is more about constructive or destructive purposes and the elemental spells. Most people use it for building repair or landscaping, but you cannot use it on people. That's where we get to the fifth kind of magic, Mendcraft. In a nutshell, that's healing magic."
"So would learning that make us witch doctors?" Luz joked, resulting in Dipper chuckling.
"Well, yeah obviously. What's so funny?" Eda asked, not getting the joke.
"Never mind." Luz replied.
"Okay then, well the sixth kind of magic is Sonaria. This is sound magic, or music magic if you like that term better. These kinds of witches use sound as a sort of conduit or reinforcement for the spell they're casting, which has its benefits and drawbacks. They can usually affect the most people all at once overall, but that means finesse is harder for them."
"So it's like a bard in a roleplaying game." Dipper noted.
"Roleplaying game? Okay boy, you're not helping me by using words I've never heard before." Eda warned.
"It's basically a game where you pretend to be someone else going on a quest for treasure or glory." He clarified.
"Ah, like the kind of things I used to do in the bedroom with my dates." Eda thought out loud. Upon seeing the teenagers blush at hearing that, she blushed too. "Moving on, the seventh kind of magic is Miragecraft. The art of making the unreal appear to be real, or in other words, casting illusions. Useful, but not always practical or legal. Illusions require a lot of creativity and foreknowledge to get right, and it's common among criminals or scammers. Imagine how easy it would be to swindle people out of their money if you could make them see what you wanted them to see."
Dipper snickered. 'If Stan had that kind of power the Mystery Shack would have more money than Scrooge McDuck.'
"So another thing you all need to learn is how to identify an illusion and if possible, dispel it. It can be harder than you think. Speaking of which, the eighth kind of magic is Draughtcraft, or making potions. This is one of the harder ones because you're taking magic from an outside source, meaning the ingredients, and converting it into a more usable form. A lot can go wrong if you don't do it right. Trust me, a bad potion or elixir is never a good thing."
Luz, Dipper, and Pacifica all got the impression that she was speaking from experience here.
"And the ninth and final kind of magic is Dreamcraft. This is the kind of magic that affects the mind and allows one to see beyond the physical world by 'opening some kind of third eye'. Those that get very good at it claim that they can see the future and even predict it. So Dreamcraft often is called Oracular magic as well."
'That sounds too much like what Bill did to people.' Dipper thought. "Can you use this magic to keep others out of your mind?"
"Oh of course. Some people even pay good money to have someone magically shield their minds for them. If you trust them enough to do that obviously."
"What kind of magic do you specialize in?" Pacifica asked.
"Oh, I dabble in elemental spells, some illusions, and some space bending spells which fall under the general magic area. All good for escaping the guards and keeping people out of my personal space. Trust me when you're as wanted as I am, it helps to keep others from getting too close."
"Wait, are you a criminal?" Dipper asked.
Eda twirled her staff for a moment. "That depends on how you define a crime."
Dipper rolled his eyes. "Yeah that's exactly what my uncle Stan would say."
Eda smiled. "Stan, I always liked that name. Anyway kids, I'm the strongest witch on the Boiling Isles, and you don't get to be the strongest without getting a few enemies along the way. And sometimes enemies take things out of context. You do a couple of pranks, ruffle a few feathers, and people don't always like it. We all do some things we're not proud of, but if making someone else unhappy was a crime then who among the three of you doesn't deserve the Conformitorium?"
Dipper and Pacifica were about to ask for clarification, but Luz beat them to it. "Trust me guys, it's bad. Basically it's this place's version of jail, and they sent a girl there just for writing fanfiction."
"Really?" Dipper asked. "Now I'm starting to wonder if staying here was a bad idea."
"You can still leave if you're willing to go to Connecticut." Luz pointed out. "But hey, who better to keep you out of witch prison than the one witch they can't ever catch?"
"Can't argue with that." Pacifica agreed.
"Okay kids, so now you have an idea of how magic is used. Let's go someplace where you can see what witches do with it, and the problems that come with it." Eda advised.
In less than an hour, the group had arrived at a large building that reminded Dipper of a convention center. The kind of place where Comic-Con might take place. The giant banner saying 'Covention' though might have helped give that impression though, but the inside sure helped too. It was set up with kiosks and information stands and witches and demons all looking like they were checking out everything offered.
"You two newcomers have good timing, you're just in time for Bonesburrough's annual Covention." Eda told them. "Basically representatives from each coven, both major and minor, gather here to try and recruit new members into their ranks."
"So covens are like clubs?" Luz asked.
Eda smirked. "I couldn't have said it better myself."
"Luz said you don't belong to one. So why did you bring us here?" Dipper pointed out.
"To let you know how the system works so you don't get confused, and to show you why I don't belong to one. Take a look over there."
Eda gestured towards a booth marked as recruiting for the Illusion Coven, with a teen applying. The man running the booth pulled up the teen's sleeve and then applied some kind of mark to his wrist. From there a soft glow spread up his arm.
"You see that? Covens require sigils which seal up your magic. For the rest of that boy's life he'll only be able to use magic that is 'approved of' by that coven. Anything else is now impossible for him to do."
"What? That's… that's like being in the market and only allowed to shop at one store." Dipper compared.
Eda nodded. "Yep, which is why I never joined a coven and never will. I don't know how it would affect either of you, but for your own good don't try and join one."
Dipper, Pacifica, and Luz all nodded.
"But I didn't bring you here just to tell you what not to do. Somehow two of you can use magic when every rule I know says you shouldn't." Eda continued, then chuckled. "But when have I said that rules weren't meant to be broken?"
"You think someone here might know why we can?" Pacifica asked.
"Huh? No, not at all. You'd have better luck finding pants for Hooty than that. No, I'm thinking that since you girls can use magic, and the boy here wants to learn more about it, you could go around and get ideas on what people do with it. Then after you get some ideas, I can do my job better."
"So look around, see what we like, but don't accept any offers?" Dipper summarized.
"Sounds like credit cards." Pacifica muttered.
Luz cringed. "Mom hates credit cards."
"Not sure what you're talking about but anyway I'll be… you know what, better that you three don't know. You know the way home if you want to leave early."
With that, Eda walked off, leaving them to do their own thing.
"So… split up?" Luz asked.
"As long as we have a meeting spot." Dipper added.
"How about the front door?" Pacifica suggested.
"Works for me. See you guys." Luz exclaimed, heading off into the covention excitedly.
"So does splitting up apply to us too?" Dipper asked.
"Right now I'd rather not. Not until we're more familiar with this world." Pacifica said, not wanting to look like a coward but she wasn't going to do something stupid just to avoid it.
Dipper nodded and the two walked off down one of the open rows in the covention. Numerous booths and kiosks drew their attention, like one that promoted medical magic for animals like vets to a potion maker who sold recreational potions as if they were soft drinks.
"Want to try a free sample?" The potion vendor asked, hoping up a cup of unknown purple liquid.
"Uhh… no thanks." Pacifica replied.
"What does it do?" Dipper asked, curious.
"Do? It tastes good that's what it does." The vendor answered.
"What's in it?"
"What are you, a guard? Either drink it or move along."
Dipper chuckled, remembering Stan saying something along those lines once, and took the cup.
"Mason!" Pacifica warned.
"Relax, if this does anything we've got enough witnesses here to sue the guy." Dipper stated, gesturing to the other customers, then carefully took a sip. "Hmm… not that bad actua… uhh…"
Dipper's pupils dilated and he went slightly limp, but he looked to be in no danger of falling. More like some medication was kicking in.
"Mason?" Pacifica asked, worried.
"Ajeegehmplubagenkamecky!" He sputtered, like his mouth was having a seizure or something.
Pacifica turned to the vendor and grabbed his shirt. "What the hell did you do to him?!"
"Nothing! I've never seen this reaction before! I swear!" The vendor assured, clearly worried about his job right now.
"Whoa!" Dipper said, shaking his head. "Talk about a rush. This makes coffee look like melatonin. Pacifica, you've got to try it."
"No way Mason."
"Well don't just stand there. We've got more to see." Dipper exclaimed before running off into the covention to look at more. A few people got shoved aside because of this, complaining.
"Mason wait!" The blonde girl called out, releasing the vendor to go after him. While Dipper might not have that much faith in his arms, even after three years, his legs were by no means comparable to noodles. He had plenty of experience running away from the more threatening troubles in Gravity Falls, and if that wasn't enough he was related to Stan Pines, the master of running away from someone trying to catch him.
"Wow look at that! What kind of animals are those? Nice music! That smells gross! Oh I bet Soos would like that!" Dipper said rapidly as he passed booth after booth.
Unfortunately he was forced to stop when he ran into something big and purple that went splat. He stumbled to the ground and heard something break along with someone scream. On the plus side this seemed to finally snap him out of that hyperactivity of his.
'Sheesh, I was like Mabel if she drank Red Bull mixed with Smile Dip.' He groaned, rubbing his head.
"You horrid little boy!" An adult woman voice scolded him.
"Mason?" Pacifica asked, catching up to him and seeing the damage he had caused. "Uh oh."
Dipper got up, finding himself covered in purple slime. At his feet was broken glass and lumps of flesh that looked like animal parts covered in blue-green fluid mixing in with the purple slime. Standing just outside of the sludge was a woman who did not look happy. She wore a purple blouse with a white vest over it and black pants with black boots, her hair was mint green and tied back in a bun, and she had ice blue eyes that were glaring into the boy's own.
"You just wrecked my abomination and my wares!" The woman said, waving her hand over the slime. It glowed and tried to rise but the blue-green fluid was doing something that prevented it. Like some kind of magical counteragent. "You've ruined my property! You owe me, cretin!"
"Hey, it was an accident! No need for name-calling!" Pacifica defended, only to receive a scowl for it. 'Those eyes, they look like my own parents. She's not going to be reasonable.'
"I'm sorry ma'am. Is there any way I can repay you?" Dipper asked.
The woman looked as if he had insulted her by offering that. "The only thing you could possibly give me that would be of any use to me is your organs."
"What?" Dipper asked, shocked.
"What the hell lady? What the actual hell?" Pacifica added.
"You ruined my wares, exotic organs used as ingredients for abomination making. You therefore owe me your own organs, as mundane as they are." The woman replied.
"In case you haven't noticed, I'm kind of using my organs." Dipper countered.
The woman shrugged indifferently. "You should have thought of that before you destroyed Blight family property."
"If you're such a dignified person, you'd at least provide a second offer. Only a barbarian would act like someone only has one option to compensate them." Pacifica rebuttled, using the kind of logic that she had seen used against her parents in the past when they were being unreasonable.
The woman looked aggravated, then like she had an idea. "You want an alternative? Very well, but only if you both accept it."
"Only if you explain it. My uncle said never accept an offer before you hear it." Dipper stated.
"Sounds like you have at least some sense. Alright, bring me gold from the titan's eye before midnight tonight, and your debt to me will be resolved. Fail, and I get to claim any and all organs that the two of you possess for my own purposes. Do we have an accord?"
'It's like dealing with Bill.' Dipper thought, ruefully.
'It's like dealing with my dad.' Pacifica thought, bitterly.
"Fine." Dipper said, holding out his hand. The woman grasped it and a ring of light surrounded both hands and spread up their arms to the elbow before disappearing.
"The oath is made. Bring me the gold before midnight, you may find me here at that time. Do not be late if you value your own flesh." She claimed, walking away with a smile like she had already won yet leaving the damaged materials on the floor.
"Now how are we going to find gold?" Pacifica asked.
"We either check every store in town hoping one does, or we go to the titan's eye and get it there directly." Dipper declared. "And something tells me if we could get it in town, she wouldn't have made us go get it in the first place."
"But how are we going to get to the titan's eye?" Pacifica asked, grimacing a bit. "It's so disgusting that we're standing on a giant dead body."
"Let's find Eda and ask her."
The two went looking for her, remembering that she was trying to hide her identity here and remain unnoticed.
"Free rides to whoever joins or can answer three riddles!" Some creature with a large mouth called out from a kiosk. Dipper and Pacifica stopped, seeing it marketed as a beast tamer coven boasting posters of various monsters.
"Worth a shot." Dipper said, getting to the clerk. "Do you have rides that can fly to the titan's head quickly?"
"Oh absolutely, there and back in two hours easily. But you've got to either join the coven or answer three riddles." The clerk repeated.
"Give me the riddles." Dipper declared, and was given a piece of paper. "I see a giraffe and it sees me. Where's the best place for me to be? Umm… considering what Eda said about them, I'm guessing the right answer is something like 'as far away as possible'?"
The clerk nodded. "That will suffice."
"Okay, next one. Give me food, I grow and shine. Give me water, I shrink and whine. What am I? Well I know it's not a gremoblin."
"It's fire." Pacifica answered.
"Correct. One more." The clerk replied.
"Let's see… A false queen that wears a crown, walks only on painted ground. She gives a task never meant to end, all while claiming to be your friend. Who is she?"
The two teens paused to think it over.
"Give up?" The clerk asked.
"This sounds like my mother, but I know that's not her. What else could be so… like her?" Pacifica thought out loud.
"I got it." Dipper stated. "A unicorn."
The clerk smiled. "You got it. Let me show you to your prize." He left the booth and led the two outside.
"A unicorn?" Pacifica whispered.
"Don't you remember that story about Mabel trying to get unicorn hair to protect the Shack against Bill?" Dipper whispered back.
"Oh right, so they're jerks here too?"
Dipper just shrugged.
Outside the covention they were brought to the back where multiple creatures were kept in what looked like a petting zoo, only these were not child friendly. There were wolf-like ones, giant slugs, big blue ducks, and griffins that had pigeon heads instead of eagle ones.
"You said that you wanted to get to the titan's head, right?" The clerk asked.
"Yes, and preferably back here before midnight if we stop to do a little exploring." Dipper pointed out.
"Well the griffin would be best for that, but unless you're experienced at handling monsters I doubt you could keep that under control."
"I've got years of horseback riding." Pacifica pointed out.
"And I've dealt with monsters that have tried to kill me since I was twelve." Dipper added.
The clerk shrugged. "You do realize that my coven is not responsible for any injuries you may and likely will acquire during this outing, and failure to return the griffin unharmed will result in severe penalties, right?"
"Is it worse than claiming our organs as collateral?" Dipper asked.
The clerk looked disgusted. "Eww no, I'm a vegan. I'll just make you pay a fine or clean up the stables for a month."
"We'll take it." Dipper stated, then the two shook hands with no magical oath being invoked. A few witches put a saddle and harness on the griffin, which prompted it to hack spiders at the handlers.
"That thing can spit out spiders?" Pacifica asked, disgusted.
"How does it do that? Does it have an internal pouch in its throat where it contains them? Why would it evolve that kind of symbiotic-?"
"Mason, don't keep asking those questions." Pacifica told him, making him stop.
The handlers helped the two get onto the griffin, with Pacifica taking the reins since she had the closest thing to experience here.
"To make it take off, say 'abra', to land say 'kadabra'." The handler told her.
"Abra kadabra? Serious-leeeeeeeeeeee!" Dipper and Pacifica started, only to be cut off by the griffin taking flight at incredible speed.
"Don't say them together unless you want it to go faster." The handler groaned after they left, facepalming. "This is going to come out of my paycheck, I just know it."
Up in the air, Dipper and Pacifica tried their hardest to not fall off the winged creature. Once it gained enough altitude it leveled out and just kept flying at top speed.
"Make it stop!" Dipper pleaded.
"How? By saying hocus pocus?" Pacifica asked.
The griffin then spun in the air like an aileron roll.
"No, don't say those words!" Dipper told her.
Pacifica tugged on the reins to at least control what direction the griffin flew. Like a horse, it complied, and soon enough she had it heading towards the skull of the titan.
"I wonder what this thing looked like when it was alive." Dipper commented. "And why did all these people decide to live on its corpse?"
"I can go my entire life not knowing those answers Journal Boy." She replied, waiting till they got right by the front of the skull. "Kadabra! Kadabra!"
The griffin dove down, reducing speed and landing on the bridge of the titan's nose. The two teenagers got off and took deep breaths.
"That was wild, but still not as bad as half the things back home." Dipper said.
"I'd say not as bad as a homicidal ghost, but better than being turned into a tapestry." Pacifica agreed, patting the griffin to make it feel appreciated. Mounts enjoyed signs of gratitude after all, and it would encourage the griffin to not leave them here.
"Hey Pacifica, look." Dipper said, pointing towards just under the giant eye socket. Built into the side was a wooden walkway with several floors, rails, and minecarts. "I think people used to actually mine gold here in the past."
"It looks rickety, I don't think anyone's used it in a long time. Maybe there's no gold left to mine?" Pacifica suggested.
"There had better be. I'm not giving someone my kidneys or lungs." Dipper said, climbing the bone wall to get to the walkway.
"Knowing your uncle, you'll still lose something when you're older." Pacifica joked, following him.