Chapter 18

Ruby and Oswald dropped Butch off at the hospital, at his request. He wanted to be with Tabitha, just in case she woke up. Oswald agreed. But not before underlining the fact that Butch owed them now. They had both avenged Tabitha's attack and ensured her safety in the future. At first, Butch hadn't been convinced. But all Oswald had had to do was casually mention that Tabitha had murdered his mother. And hadn't received justice for it.

"But if you work for me again," Oswald said airily, "I just might sweep that little incident under the rug."

Ruby saw right through him. Oswald wouldn't forgive Tabitha anymore than she would forgive her parents. But Butch could be useful. Not only was he noted in the city's criminal underbelly, but he also had quite a few connections. Having such connections was worth feigning forgiveness.

Butch bought it, hook, line, and sinker. Left the car with a spring in his step that there hadn't been before.

The minute the limo was out again, Oswald and Ruby burst into laughter. Opening all the windows to get rid of Butch's cheap cologne, they went over what they'd gone through in detail. Cackling when they remembered Azrael's grisly end. High-fived.

"While I can't say I'm happy about your fighting Azrael," Oswald admitted, "you've gotten us into the Waynes' good graces. This could come in handy in the future."

"Yeah." Ruby said, keeping two hands on the wheel while a third adjusted her hair. "To be honest, though...I didn't do it for gain."

From the backseat, Oswald watched her curiously.

Ruby continued. "That kid...I feel bad for him. He kinda reminded me of myself when I was that age. I couldn't let Azrael hurt him." She chuckled hollowly. "Maybe I'm too soft for this job after all."

A warm hand rested on her shoulder. She turned around. Indigo met icy-blue. "Don't you ever say that." He said firmly. "You are all I have left, Ruby. And if it hadn't been for you, I would still be slaving away, picking up after those disgusting wastes of human flesh. I am certain that there is more strength in you than you realize."

Ruby was blushing so hard she felt feverish. Grateful for the dark, she covered Oswald's hand with hers. "Right back at you."

Oswald blinked in surprise.

"You've endured a hella lot more than most people can claim, and you always bounce back. You're one of the strongest people I've ever met." Ruby squeezed his hand. "To be honest..." She took a deep breath. "Before you came along, I'd never disobeyed an order. So if I have this strength, it's thanks to you."

Oswald didn't realize he'd teared up until the first one slid down his face. Inhaling shakily, he rested his forehead on their intertwining hands. Breathing unsteadily, trying to get a grip. No one had ever paid him such a compliment. Not even his mother. He felt something churning within him, unknown yet pleasant. Ruby watched him between glances at the road. But at this hour, there were few cars. She kept most of her attention on him, ready to give him whatever he might need. He finally looked up. Gave a tiny smile to show that he was fine. But Ruby could still tell that she'd struck a cord with him. And she felt more than a little guilty for it.

Oswald, on the other hand, felt like something had grown within him. A tiny stem rising from burnt, sterile soil.

Days ripened into weeks. Oswald's connections and alliances sprung forth daily, spreading across every corner of the city like some brand of mushroom. Before long, all the gang bosses swore loyalty to him. Their underlings had no choice but to follow suit. Oswald kept firm control over his new minions via dealings. The gangs could go about their shady dealings as usual, but forty percent of every profit was directly wired into Oswald's bank account. That alone was a far sweeter deal than Maroni, Falcone, or Fish Mooney had ever provided. There was the occasional crack-pot who refused to pay up. They'd always get a visit from either Victor Zsasz or Ruby Sinclair. One used knives, whips, and bats. The other used nothing but her own body. Both always returned home with a wad of cash thick enough to plug a hole in the roof with.

Ruby and Oswald soon fell into a comfortable rhythm in their day-to-day lives. In the morning, Oswald would come down to a breakfast banquet. He and Ruby would always break bread together. Always. Then, once they'd dressed, they would discuss the day's tasks. Sometimes, they would split up. But most of the time, they went together. Ruby would stand behind Oswald, ready to intervene if anything went awry. The two behaved more professionally when in front of subordinates. They referred to each other by surname, never joked around, and never made physical contact. But every now and then, they'd exchange a glance. One that turned Ruby's insides to butter.

One morning, on the three-week anniversary of Azrael's defeat, the phone began to ring.

Ruby and Oswald had been sitting at the dining table, laying siege to the buffet. With a mouthful of tofu eggs Ruby stood up, tying her bathrobe up. "I got it!" The words came out so muffled that Oswald couldn't help chuckling. He took another sip of his tea. Swallowing down the food, Ruby picked up the phone. "Van Dahl residence." A moment of silence. "Sorry, who is this?" Half a minute. "Barbara?"

Oswald stopped. A pang of nostalgia flooded through him. He turned around. Ruby was standing beside the window, a hand on her hip and a curious expression on her face. She met his eyes and immediately got the message. "Uh, okay ma'am. He's right here." She grabbed the phone alongside the receiver. Brought it to him to avoid his pressuring his leg. Oswald was touched by the simple gesture. Thanking her with a wink, he held the receiver. "Hello?"

"Ozzy!" Barbara's silky voice tickled his ear. "It's been so long. How've ya been?"

"I..." Oswald swallowed. "I'm glad to hear from you Barbara. I knew that you'd left Arkham, but..."

"But you thought I'd been brainwashed?" Barbara laughed. "Funny, but no. I pack a better punch than all of those wackos combined."

Oswald chuckled. "Nice to know."

"So who's the chick who answered?" Barbara asked coyly. "Did you hook up while I was away? If so, then congrats! I was starting to think they'd chopped your balls off or something."

Oswald blushed all the way to his roots. He turned away so that Ruby could not see. It turns out that he had nothing to worry about. She was already beginning to clear up. Balancing their empty dishes, she made her way to the kitchen. Where she found such energy was still a mystery. Relieved and strengthened, Oswald cleared his throat. "No, both of your assumptions are incorrect. While I'm infinitely pleased to hear from you, may I ask why you're calling? Last I heard you had tried to reconcile with Jim without success." Petty revenge was as sweet and strong as a whiskey shot. He could hear Barbara snorting from the other end. After a moment she spoke again. Her voice was as tight and prickly as barb wire. "Well, yeah. But I'm a girl who bounces back. Which is why I'm calling actually."

"Oh?" Oswald propped his chin atop his knuckles. Ruby waved at him, catching his attention. She pointed at herself, then pointed at the clock. Next, she held up three fingers on one hand, and a zero with the other. Okay. She needed half an hour. Oswald nodded. Ruby smiled her thanks and disappeared. Oswald thought there was something sad in her smile. But he didn't have time to think about it.

"Yeah." Babara's smile was audible. "Tabby and I, we've talked about doing a business together for, like, ever." Oswald stiffened at the mention of Tabitha, but allowed Barbara to continue. "And we just found a perfect spot. Only problem is, it's fulla jerkoffs."

Oswald waited a beat before answering. "And you are telling me this because...?"

"Because we could use a little help." Barbara said. "Now, if you could be a doll and spread the word that you've got our backs-"

"Barbara." Oswald interrupted sweetly. "Dear, loving Barbara. You're a smart cookie. So please tell me: why in the world would I allow my mother's killer to start her own business? In all honesty, I think that you should be glad that I allowed your friend to live."

"Oh, Pengy." Barbara replied. "You're breaking my heart! What's a little homicide between old friends?"

"You are my friend," Oswald corrected. "But Tabitha Galavan is anything but. Ergo, I repeat: why should I help?"

"Because I'll give you ten percent of everything we earn?" Barbara sounded like she was waving a treat before a hungry dog's nose. "And we'll share whatever juicy gossip we hear?" Oswald paused. Contemplated. Indeed, that sounded like a good deal. Oswald may have been obtaining support, but there were still those who opposed him. Who denied the inevitable. If left unchecked, such sparks could become flames consuming everything he'd worked for.

Finally, he spoke. "Very well," he said, "but be sure to hold your end of the deal."

"Of course." Barbara purred. "Thanks, Pengy. Here's the address."

Oswald copied it down on his napkin. Once that was done, he and Barbara said their goodbyes and hung up. The Penguin sat there, in the same chair that his father had so long ago. His father...he had trusted the wrong people, and it had been his downfall. What if Oswald had inherited his awful judgement? Sighing, Oswald covered his face with his hands. He remained that way for a few minutes. Trying to get it together. At last, he took a deep breath and raised his voice, "Ruby!"

No answer.

He glanced at the clock. Wow. It had been twenty minutes already. He yelled again, just to see if Ruby had finished whatever she was doing early. When that still bore no fruit, Oswald felt a stab of concern. He gathered his cane and rose, grimacing at the pain this caused. Hobbling out of the dining room, he kept calling Ruby's name. Peeking in broom closets, the laundry room, the library...anywhere he thought she might be. That was when he passed by a window.

From this part of the house, the family crypt was visible. It was a tiny stone hut, bearing the Van Dahl family crest on its eastern wall. Oswald swallowed. He remembered his father telling him that the family's founder had built that crypt, right when business had started booming. To avoid grave-robbing. Ever since then, each Van Dahl had been buried there following their funeral.

Except, of course, Grace and her children. They'd been tossed in rubbish, just as they had deserved.

Oswald plucked up his courage and headed down the stairs.

Ten minutes later, he was outside. It was a lovely morning. The sky was thick with clouds; grayish cotton balls heavy with moisture. Neverthless, the cool air buzzed with electricity. Birds chirped sweetly from the shifting trees. Every now and then, Oswald caught sight of squirrels. The crypt stood amongst this all, gray against green. Oswald made his way towards it, his slippered feet barely making a sound on the grassy lawn. As he got closer, he realized that it had been visited very recently. The steps had been swept. The open door didn't squeak as he pushed it wider.

Oswald looked around. The place was piled high with coffins, each one bearing an elegantly-written name. On each wall, three coffins were neatly placed on a marble shelf. The upper one kissed the ceiling. The middle was at eye-level. The last one crouched at Oswald's feet. On and on, for two floors below. Each floor was connected by a very narrow staircase. The place was gloomy, yet strangely pleasant. All of the vases contained fresh flowers.

Then, just below, he saw Ruby.

She was kneeling before one of the caskets. A bouquet of lillies went from her hands to the vase. Every movement was deliberate and careful, as if handling some fragile beauty. Like a memory.

Slowly, respectfully, Oswald shambled towards her. As he got closer, he heard her mumbling.

"...Sorry I haven't visited in a while, Master." Ruby whispered, head bowed. "But I've been busy." A thin sliver of laughter echoed through the stony walls. "Oswald is working so hard. I'm sure you would be proud of him. I certainly am."

Oswald blushed. He stood behind her, not wanting to interrupt.

Ruby sniffed. From where he stood, Oswald could see dark, wet spots on the ground before her. He shivered as he realized what it meant: that she had been crying.

"I miss you so much, Master." Ruby swallowed. "All the time. I think about you frequently. You were the only one who made me feel like I was...something. My parents, they just locked me away from the world. Strange, he kicked me out the moment he was done with me. But you...you gave me a home. Kindness. You made me smile like no one had ever done." Ruby was openly crying now. "And for that, I'm eternally grateful." Unable to say another word, she broke down into tears. Her sobs echoed through the cold, stony walls. It was the saddest sound that Oswald had ever heard. They mirrored the weeping in his own heart, every day. Oswald carefully knelt down behind Ruby. Locked an arm around her. Ruby froze in surprise. But then, her hands rested on his arm. She continued to weep, leaning her head back to rest on his shoulder.

They stayed like that for an immeasurable amount of time. To them, time was as meaningless as the dead surrounding them.

The building was located in the territory of El Loco. Enough said.

Ruby had heard stories about this guy, and not just because of Oswald. If ever there had been an animal born in human skin, it was El Loco. He ran a drug ring throughout the entire area, and whomever wanted to live there had to either work for him or beat it. Barbara wasn't accepting either choices. Based on that alone, Ruby wasn't sure whether to judge the woman as courageous or deranged.

The limousine glided to a stop. Ruby climbed out of the driver's seat, brushing herself off. Because they'd be meeting with a friend of Oswald's, she had made an even greater effort to look worthy. She wore black velvet pants, a dark blue blouse, and a purple vest that she had personally studded with rose quartzes. Ruby wore garnet earrings and a necklace of her namesake. Hopefully, she would look like she actually belonged to a criminal's meeting.

The passanger's door opened. Two of Oswald's newest thugs emerged. Behind their sunglasses, they looked at the building skeptically. Ruby swept past them and held out her hand. She had learned by now that Oswald struggled to get out of cars due to his leg. To spare him the embarressment, she had taken it upon herself to help him out. Oswald still smiled and blushed every time. It was adorable.

Oswald was dressed finely today. Midnight-blue suit. Indigo tie. Black pleather shoes with sky-blue spats. Jewelled buttons lined his cuffs. Ruby had polished them to a blinding shine. Oh, yes. Those women - the Sirens, as they wanted to be called - wouldn't know what hit them.

Yet as they crowded into the elevator, all four of them, Ruby got a closer look. In truth, Oswald was nervous. He hadn't seen Barbara in a while, and was thus unsure of how to feel about seeing her again. And of course, Tabitha's presence would be enough to rile him up. However, Oswald couldn't allow himself to display weakness. He was above all of them. He just needed to be reminded of it once in a while.

Ruby cleared her throat. "Boss." He turned to her with those piercing, icy-blue eyes. Normally, they looked sharp enough to cut through diamonds. Right now, they seemed soft. "Um, remember that gang that still wasn't giving in?" Ruby tapped a finger on her weak chin. "What were they called? The Leaping Dwarves?"

"The Jumping Shrimp." Oswald corrected. "Due to the fact that it hires little people and trains them to be effective assassins."

Ruby pointed at him. "Yep, that's them. Well," she folded her arms, "those little people will be doing your bidding from now on. I called them on the way here."

The two thugs snorted, as if to say, Yeah, right. Oh, blessed ignorance.

Oswald blinked at her. "One telephone call was enough to persuade those dwarf-loving, blood-lusting pigs to submit?"

Ruby winked. "You can thank this beauty for it." Reaching into her pocket, she extracted something that made all three men gasp. It was a lapis lazuli the size of an avocado. Smooth and oval, like some mystical dragon's egg, it was the deepest blue veined with gold. Oswald's jaw was practically touching his tie. Ruby chuckled. Pocketed it once more. "I'd bought it some years ago, with my saved wages." A brief pause. "I...sent it to my mom. She sent it back." Ruby could feel some tears prickling at her eyes. She forced them back and put on a smile. "Her loss, our gain. Am I right?"

One of the thugs stared at her. "Damn." He said. "Your mom's a bitch."

You have no idea. Ruby thought darkly.

"Ruby - Miss Sinclair - I..." Oswald swallowed hard, visibly moved. His eyes glimpsed at the men guarding him. Trained back on Ruby. "I assure you, this gesture will not go to waste. And thank you. Excellent job." His eyes said much more than his mouth. Ruby's eyes responded. In that moment, the doors opened with a ding.

"Ah!" The guards squeezed against the metal walls to let Oswald pass. Without thinking he reached out behind him, his hand waiting. Ruby took it. The two of them marched down the hallway. The two guards shared a glance.

"So," One said, "you think they're banging?"

The second scoffed. "Think? I'll bet my left testicle that they do it on a regular basis."

The first one looked after them, shaking his head. "The guy's got lousy taste. Sinclair looks like half a boy. Me, I like my women with curve and bounce, if you get my drift."

The second rolled his eyes. "We live together, genius. I've learned more about sex from you than all of middle school S.E." He lightly punched his friend on the shoulder. "C'mon, let's see what these bitches want."

'Those bitches' seemed to want their slice of the underworld cake. As Ruby and Oswald entered, still holding hands, they were taken aback. From what Barbara had said, this project was still in its crib. Yet it was already beginning to resemble a place where people could drink. The place had high ceilings and sharp, dark angles. Its eastern walls were made entirely of glass, demonstrating the view of Gotham over a hundred feet above ground. Everything was clean. A bar took up center stage in the room's naval. Lights had been arranged above it, resembling the outline of a great coffin. Orbs of blown white glass would provide further illumination with the coming of night. A stage had been set up, complete with musical instruments.

Oswald stared at it all, star-struck, as Ruby whistled. "Damn."

"Ooh, and you kiss Ozzy's ring with that mouth?"

All heads turned towards the voice. A slender blonde came into being, dressed in hot pink and high heels. Her hair was swept back, her makeup impeccable. She walked towards them rather smoothly considering her footwear, a martini glass in her manicured hand. Oswald reluctantly let go of Ruby's hand. His own quickly turned to ice. He smiled. "Barbara! It's been too long." He limped down the steps to meet Barbara. They exchanged air kisses. Ruby felt a prick of jealousy in her gut. Kicked herself for it.

Barbara smiled warmly at Oswald. "Yes indeed. So much has happened. We'll have to catch up, don't you think?"

"Absolutely." Oswald said. "But for now," he gestured to the steps, "why don't we discuss business first?"

"Always the proper gentleman, I see." Barbara seated herself right where Ruby's battered boots were. With a muted scoff the maid moved. A bit. Barbara glanced up, studied Ruby a moment, then turned back to Oswald. "Pengy, who's this? The lovely lady who answered the phone?"

"Yep. That's me." Ruby interjected before Oswald could open his mouth. Reached down and offered her hand to Barbara. Fought the temptation to sprout claws. "Ruby Sinclair, bodyguard and maid. Pleased to meet you."

Barbara gave an approving smile. Without accepting Ruby's hand. "See? Now was that so hard, not swearing?" Turning back to Oswald, she laughed. "Oh, Ozzy, are all of your servants so well-mannered?" Ruby dropped her hand just in time to be waved off by Barbara. "Now, be a dear and get me a refill." Barbara shoved the martini glass in Ruby's hand without turning to look at her. "Now, onto business."

Oswald's jaw was clenched. He nodded. "Yes. You want a loan in exchange for gossip and a percentage of your earnings, yes?"

Barbara nodded. "Sounds pretty cut-and-dry, but yeah. That's about it."

Oswald swallowed. "How much?"

"Oh, I don't know." Barbara twirled some hair around her finger. "For the alcohol, publicity, and hired help, I'd say..." She pretended to think before saying, "Forty thousand."

Oswald's dark brows climbed up his forehead. "A hefty sum."

"Yeah well," Barbara grinned, "ya gotta spend if ya wanna earn. You know?"

"Yes, I do." Oswald smiled tightly. Took a step forward. "Allow me to add my own condition to the deal: you are to repay me within the year. If not, you will pay in blood. I suggest you do it in dollars while you can."

Barbara didn't bother asking him if he'd really do it. She already knew. "Fine. Sounds fair."

"And," Oswald added, "I may need a favor from time to time."

Barbara rolled her eyes, "Jeez. What else can I get ya, big boy? A cold beverage?" She raised her hands when she saw Oswald's darkening expression. "Take a joke! Okay, deal."

Oswald smiled. "Excellent."

If only he'd have known.