Somewhere on Autumn Woods Drive

By Rikku Minouke

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH

AN: Oh my, I love you guys who reviewed! Smexy Kitten (I always look forward to your messages, of all sorts), Vanessia (lets see if I can bring you back life with some of the future chapters), Heartluv (I cannot get enough of your enthusiasm!). All of you guys push me to keep writing and if it weren't for you guys who knows where this story would be at. So not only am I thanking you (my husband as well, he knows this story is special to me), but everyone else should as well.

Chapter thirty four

There was a time period where I felt like I was back at school. I was all alone and this time it was completely my fault. Just like school, I spent the majority of my time lying in bed staring at the wall. Then when the time was right, I'd force myself out of bed and be barely a meat sack at work. Every time I looked in the mirror I saw a hollowed out soul that was slowly dying. The only difference this time was that I had a baby to live for and had to keep pushing forward.

"Are you listening to Taylor Swift right now?" I heard her voice and didn't even roll over to look at my bedroom door.

"Yeah," I told her with little emotion in my voice. What was the point when my emotions were too busy trying to figure out how to piece my heart back together?

The bed dipped behind me and I swallowed. "What is wrong? Kurama barely looked at me when he let me in and now you are listening to 'All too Well' and 'Almost Do.' Something's up." I didn't feel like responding to that because I knew it would just make me feel worse. So I shrugged. "Do you want to get some ice cream?" Raising my eyebrows even though I knew she couldn't see them, I thought about that for a moment. It was hard to say no to ice cream. "I know you can't deny that. Especially if I say I'll treat you to Cold Stone."

"Will you help me up?" I asked and she stood immediately to round the bed. She grabbed my hands and pulled me to a standing position. "Let's do this."

"You look like shit," she told me lightheartedly. I rolled my eyes.

"I feel like shit," I told her. On so many levels that was true. My head hurt, my heart hurt, my stomach felt funky the last few days, and my back felt broken.

"Let's try to fix that," She smiled at me as we left my room. "I'll grab your coat if you wanna stick your feet in your boots." Without a word, I did as she said. Ears straining to try and hear what Kurama was up to, I tilted my head while I stood in the hall to see if I could catch a glimpse of his red hair. "He's not here anymore."

Her voice was quiet and had a serious edge to it. Glancing at her, I saw her face no longer had that worrisome smile. "What do you mean?"

"When he let me in, Kurama was on his way out," Keiko told me and I sighed.

"He doesn't work today," my forehead scrunched in way I hadn't been used to in a long time.

"I know he's not with the guys tonight," Keiko shrugged. "Maybe one of his work friends?"

"Yeah, it could be Yomi," I said quietly.

"Do you still want ice cream?" Keiko asked holding up my coat and I looked at her honestly and shook my head. "That's ok, we don't need to go out. Why don't you just take your boots off and we'll sit on the couch?" I nodded as I felt the muscles in my face tense up in preparation for the tears that didn't come. Sighing, I took my boots back off and dragged myself to the couch.

"I hate feeling like this," I mumbled and looked at the couch. My eyes glared at the couch because I couldn't even face plant it like I would have done had I not been pregnant.

"It's been a little over a week since you guys had that talk," Keiko said and I gave her my best 'I'm listening' gaze while I sat down. "Have you even seen him or talked to him since then?"

"No," I shook my head. "We have kind of been avoiding each other."

"Yeah?" she came to sit next to me. "Have you been eating regularly?" I nodded. "Putting lotion on the stretch marks?" I shook my head. "That's ok. Not a big deal. I saw you have a changing table in your room now. That's new right?"

"Yeah, my parents brought that over a couple weeks ago," I told her. "Shortly before valentines day. I'm accumulating more stuff the further along I get."

"You're passed the twenty week mark now," Keiko tried to give a happy smile. "Over half way there!"

"Yeah I suppose so," I nodded.

"Stop being so gloomy, Botan," Keiko snapped and I looked into her hard eyes. "You just need to talk to Kurama about this. March is almost here and before you know it, spring will be knocking at your door. Time flies by quick, don't waste it moping."

"I miss him so much," I admitted and felt the wave of longing hit me.

"Then deal with it," Keiko shook her head. "Jeeze Botan, you can't just let life slap you in the face all the time. You have a baby now. Take charge of what you want. And if Kurama is someone you want in your life than find a way for him to be there. Don't let this," she motioned to me as a whole with a disgusted expression, "take advantage of you."

"Oh my god," my hand went to my stomach as Keiko became on high alert.

"What?" Keiko asked, her back straightening and eyes wide.

My mouth hung open as I tried to figure out how to describe what I was feeling. "It's like… popcorn in my stomach."

She was quiet for a second before her laugh sounded and it was the first time I had smiled in days. "Your baby boy is moving."

This time when the tears threatened, I had a few happy ones roll down my cheeks. It was such a weird sensation and if I hadn't really thought about it, I probably would have passed it off as something else. But it was still there and I knew it was him moving around. And there was one person I wish could be here with me to experience this. He should be here right now; not out getting drinks with a coworker in hopes of ignoring me.