Chihiro reached her room almost not knowing how she made it there; her soul was in so much turmoil she almost fell to the floor when the door shut behind her, as her vision violently trembled causing her stomach to do back flips and her brain to become a mass of swirling colors and loud, brash noise like the sound of a million trombones.
She almost fainted, but only blacked out for a split second; Rin stirred in her deep sleep but did not awaken. Chihiro's only sounds were of very labored breathing and teeth chattering; she felt like she needed to be sick.
It was as though her mind was attacking her.
Certainly this man was someone to not be near, and his evasion of her questions was an alarming sign.
Surely he was only a few years older than her, brand new to this college and he was no guardian of the students.
So what had been his business out there at dawn?
Through her frenzied mind, she could only connect the appearance of the snake with the teacher's presence, and she wondered who was more a snake of the two.
What the hell had been with his intensity and his intimate holding of her face as he stared her soul through?
Her skin tingled where his fingers had been, and she was covered with goose bumps at recalling his scent and his gaze.
Suddenly it occurred to her that he was everything she had been running from - but she did not know what that was.
How was a stranger so affecting her? Surely she was connecting some unrelated event or person to his presence - something in him must have provoked something within her subconscious that was really not connected to him.
Chihiro grasped her head as it began to pound and pulled her hair.
Yet maybe, like her, he had been restless, and been as surprised as her to find someone else there at such a time? He had just happened to be in time to save her from a snake... - surely her eyes had not been mistaken when she saw the reptile fling up in the air and backwards, all by itself, off the rock? - and she had seen his hand fall directly after the snake dropped, as though he had moved it, but not with any visible force.
Perhaps she was tired, scared and shocked, and her brain did not process events properly - especially in the darkness.
She shook herself, and managed to get to the adjoining bathroom, where she shed her clothes and got in to the shower, shrinking in a ball on the tiled floor and letting the hot water comfort her.
She had rash thoughts of leaving this place altogether, were it not for how proud her parents were of her decision to pursue this course. She had to make her parents proud of her, and happy to look upon her a faithful God fearing daughter.
She brought her hands up to her eyes and watched as they trembled, pale and almost blue.
Those eyes - had been so incisive, like a spell to cut through many webs of memory, like a knife that cut her heart to the quick. She shook herself again; this was quite literally insane and she had to calm herself.
There was no room for intensifying a situation because of the context - she rather should have thanked him for saving her from the snake. Yet his own tone and demeanor had been so patronizingly and self righteously angry that her pride forbade it.
A voice told her that God did not approve of pride, and it was the devil's own sin - that she should turn the other cheek and treat those who were cruel with kindness.
Chihiro would, with any other person. But this - this man, she could not.
He had seemed hostile from the very beginning. Her natural self and animal soul repulsed him.
Chihiro did not know that she'd fallen asleep in the shower, till she woke up freezing cold with Rin shaking her.
'Oh my God, you're alive' Rin had tears streaming down her face 'Chihiro are you ok?' The poor girl put a towel around Chihiro and handed clothes to her.
'I - I'm just a b-bit c-cold' Chihiro shuddered, feeling cramped all over from the position she had been in. At least her extreme nausea had gone away and the spell of that night time encounter was gone.
'How did you end up in the shower?' Rin's voice was filled with rushed concern and worry.
'I - I couldn't sleep' Chihiro shivered inside the towel as Rin helped her out of the shower and on to the bath mat. She began weakly drying herself off, wobbling a little bit here and there off balance.
For some reason, she couldn't bring herself to explain what had happened last night, for she could hardly credit it as real herself. She had only slept for an hour and a half yet it felt like an eternity away.
She paled at the thought of seeing the young lecturer again.
'You weren't feeling well so you got in the shower then fell asleep?' Rin passed Chihiro her shirt, as she turned her back.
'Y-yes' why was she not telling her the truth? Perhaps she would, when she herself had more time to process it.
'You stay in bed and get better' Rin urged, but Chihiro shook her head.
'After I eat something - I'll feel better' Rin looked uncertain, and made Chihiro promise that if she felt the slightest bit sick to go back to bed. After Rin got her assurance, the two went to the cafeteria. To Chihiro's great thankfulness, she did not see the new teacher there.
That morning in the daily church service, the campus director made an announcement, as usual. There were often house keeping duties to be outlined, or certain issues to be addressed. This morning was a little different.
'This term we are introducing our new initiative; it is called Spiritual Mentorship. Each student will be paired with either a teacher, tutor, counselor, or someone on the board, to assist them even more closely in their day to day spiritual progress.
We all know it can be very difficult, even in this enriching environment, to deal with internal struggles and trauma which we all have.
We all need an objective, older, experienced warrior of God to help guide us without judgement.
Your pre-selected mentor will be given to you by Tanaka; you can go and see him at the admin office at any time.
This mentorship is mandatory and necessary for your graduation from this college, as one day you yourselves will be spiritual teachers. This is a great way of learning first hand how to approach someone less knowledgeable than you in the art of spiritual guidance.
The sheet you receive will outline further details. Any further questions please address them to Tanaka or one of the ladies in the main office.'
There was some murmuring, and wondering; - Chihiro was not overly interested in this information as she was focused on staying awake.
The afternoon break came, and Chihiro and Rin spent it in the library reading up on some texts about the local shrines they were going to see next lesson. The events of last night kept playing through Chihiro's mind, and she desperately wanted to tell Rin; - yet for some reason her tongue tied and her mouth dried up whenever she opened her mouth to speak. It was a curse that she had to face him in a few moments yet again.
Ito-san came and sat down with them to catch up on the same information. He was about twenty or so, with dark brown hair and eyes. His dialect was from the country, and Chihiro rather liked the sound of it.
'I see I'm not the only one getting ahead on some of the local legend' Ito smiled as he sat next to Rin.
'Here, I've just finished with this one' Rin gave him a book on statues located around Okinawa.
'Thank you' Ito looked at Chihiro briefly.
'Ah - Chihiro-san, are you ok?'
She looked up at him from across the table and blinked.
'Just a little tired, thank you for asking' she smiled. 'How are you?'
'I'm pretty good' he said, smiling back, a slight blush on his cheeks. The three continued to read in relative silence, broken only by some discreet coughs from Chihiro.
'You're getting sick aren't you Chi-san?' Rin looked at her friend with a creased brow.
'No, I swear I'm fine!'
'No need to swear, I can tell without it!' Rin rummaged in her bag and shoved tissues under Chihiro's hand.
'Here. Are you sure you're ok to walk around the island?'
'I should be, especially if I'm with you'
Ito looked at each of the girls. 'That new teacher doesn't seem like he has the sort of humour to deal with sick students - you dare risk his anger?' Ito's eyes twinkled with light-hearted sarcasm, but looked slightly surprised at the deep blush that he saw on Chihiro's face.
'Chihiro-san, are you sure you don't have a fever?' He asked.
'I - I assure you, I'm fine' she smiled slightly, and sipped some of the water from her bottle.
'Thank you both for your concern' her tone was genuinely grateful. Chihiro felt very lucky to be surrounded by such kindness; it really touched her heart to feel so cared for. On the other hand, she dreaded the strange intensity and harshness of the new lecturer she soon had to face again. Chihiro had decided that there was nothing to be done but act as though nothing had happened last night. Distracted by her thoughts, she did not see Rin and Ito exchange glances with each other.
When Chihiro entered the class room with Ito at her side (Rin had gone to collect an exercise book she had forgotten), she had to scream at herself to remember she did not need to act as though her lecturer had come across her that early morning. She knew, without looking, that Nigihayami-sensei was at the lecturer's desk at the front, and she was glad she did not have to worry about him noticing her, as he did not.
Ito sat near Chihiro and watched her face for a second, feeling as though her spirit was greatly troubled.
He was quite accurate in his guess, but he had no idea what to do or say. He thought Chihiro was really pretty, and had really admired her character and unique outlook on life when he first spoke to her on their first term together last year in June. Since then he had grown to like her quite a bit, but knew God would rather he focus himself on the Word rather than a girl; for now, at least. He would ask Chihiro out and offer her a God blessed partnership when they graduated.
Chihiro was having to practice some breathing rhythm to not only calm her heart beat but regulate her light-headedness. She didn't look up once from her book, until the class was told to follow Nigihayami-sensei outside. There, a bus awaited them and Chihiro made a studied attempt to not look at the teacher as she passed him down the small bus walkway.
Ito had glanced at their Sensei as he walked behind Chihiro, with Rin behind him, and was a little confused to meet the blank appraisal of the lecturer. He blushed a little at the singular regard, but lowered his eyes respectfully. That teacher sure would be able to keep anyone in line with just a look.
They were going to Futenma Shrine, which was located near the area of the campus.
'I personally don't like this study of pagan culture' Ito said to Chihiro 'we should rather be looking at the churches in the area.'
'I agree' nodded Chihiro 'I do understand the importance of knowing our personal religious history to understand the Christianization of Japan later, but it beats me why we have to study it in such detail' Chihiro leaned her forehead against the bus window, feeling the refreshing coolness of the glass as opposed to the heat of the bus. The day was just beginning, but it was already very warm. Something in her spirit was strangely keen to explore these temples, though she wouldn't admit it to herself. They arrived very quickly and filed out of the bus.
Chihiro felt a raw sense of ancient serenity that emanated from the place. The sound of rustling paper and bells faintly came to her ears, and the smell of old stone, wood and water hit her nose with poignant sweetness.
This place held a sacred charm that transcended its physicality - it was as though a spirit of restfulness had its abode there and lulled each visitor with peace. Surely this was not evil, this was not a heathen grotto of God's hatred?
She almost completely forgot about the sensei. The students passed under the antique Torii, representing their entrance in to a spiritual place, and then proceed to a stone trough to cleanse their hands and mouth to be purified in order to the sacred place. A few students refused to under go this ritual due to sensitive matters of 'right and wrong in God's eyes' - and not dedicating themselves in any way to a shrine of demons.
Chihiro and Rin did not feel so convicted, and with about ten other students, went through. Ito almost refused, had it not been for both the girls going.
The ornate beauty of the edifice struck especially the foreign students not acquainted with much native architecture.
The cream and blonde wood work, topped with striking golden additions, the finely carved latticed windows to the adorned roof were all of inherent elegance.
Again Chihiro wondered how such a building could ever be representative of evil or be an abomination to God. Surely such a display of God-given skill and craftsmanship was not something to despise?
She warred within herself as she felt so deeply drawn to the entire place. There was a solemn majesty that defied the ridicule of those sorts of Christians who abhorred spiritual places not of their God.
Chihiro mentally shook herself - 'what on earth am I saying, by referring to my God as their God? Is he not mine, as well?'
Maybe there was a subtle spell around this place that preyed on curiously awed minds like hers. Rin seemed similarly impressed, however, as the building appealed to her artistic senses.
As students filed in to the shrines main hall, Chihiro found herself drawn more to a glimpse of a magical cavern to the side.
She slowly walked up to a grotto, or cave, which opened it's wide mouth to onlookers, its sharp stalagmite and stalactite teeth projecting upwards and downwards with their thousands of years of history.
Chihiro walked closer to it, and felt enveloped by a timeless sacrosanctness. Surely in ancient times past, beings of power attended to the prayers of the old kings; this sort of place did not quite seem of this world.
'You would be right'
Chihiro turned to see her lecturer was leaning against the cave wall just behind her. Her tongue was tied, she hardly knew what to say, the memory of last night strange on her mind. He was so bewildering; - had she spoken out loud, or had he read her thoughts?
He languidly pointed to the east.
'The Old King of Okinawa was faithful to Shintoism, and had this shrine and cave connected to his palace by a path many hundreds of years ago. He would come here often to pray, and beseech the gods.' His piercing peridot eyes met Chihiro's surprised brown gaze with a gleam in his expression.
'You know, a very beautiful woman lived in this cave - thousands of years ago - a man desired her, and she ran from him, she stood where you are now. She was never seen again. People often come here and wish for fertility from the goddess'
Chihiro's heart was beating like a hummingbird in her throat. What was she to say to him? Her dizziness returned quite strongly; she raised a hand to her head, praying that she could keep it together. A wind hit her face - not from outside, but from deep within the cave. Chihiro's eyes widened as she tried to look in to the darkness.
'Twenty thousand years' she heard his voice carrying to her ears, and it sounded like the very weight of that time laid upon his speech.
'This cave has been sacred to the faithful'
Chihiro found her tongue. 'Faithful to what?' Her voice sounded annoyingly breathless to her ears; but her heart only sped up at the closeness of her lecturer.
'To those who resided over the cave, to protect the people'
Chihiro stared in to the timeless cave, rather than at her teacher, as she interacted with him.
'You speak of - people, who presided here?'
He came and stood next to her at the railing, and Chihiro felt frozen. She wanted to ask him about the snake last night, and why he had been so angry, but he seemed so changed from last night that he could have been a different person. His tone here was almost amiable, conversational at best - she didn't feel provoked.
'No' he answered. 'I talk of spirits'
Chihiro turned to him.
'Aren't spirits either good, or evil? If these were worshiped and tried to hold any power over the people here, under the pretext of protection, then they were trying to take the place of the one true God. Were they not demons?'
Chihiro turned her gaze to the face of her lecturer, and he seemed to be looking deeply in to the grotto, his light eyes narrowed, his long hair moving round him in a wild way from the seemingly preternatural wind.
'It is not as simple as that' his tone was deep and dangerous all of a sudden, and Chihiro stepped back slightly.
'The Bible is clear - there is good and evil - that is all' Chihiro was not going to fall prey to his aura.
'Megami tells me she cowers at your devout piety' Nigihayami-sensei turned to Chihiro and caught her gaze with his, his voice filled with laughing sarcasm.
Her eyes widened as his green eyes seemed yellow, and they flashed with golden lights, like the cave rock around them. His hair whipped round her, and she felt surrounded by him - his voice crashing round her ears like many waters.
'But when did you become so in love with a God who is dead?'
Chihiro's head burst with pain, and she gazed in horror at the chillingly striking face of her lecturer.
'W-what?' He sounded entirely different, altogether, like some inhuman creature, and his pupils were slits like a snakes, or a dragon's - Chihiro felt completely terrified and her soul withered within her. Almost as quickly, Nigihayami-sensei seemed to have an appearance of shock as his yellow eyes widened, and he closed them quickly shutting off their piercing light.
'I'm sorry. Forgive me' his voice was now soft as silks hushing; Nigihayami-sensei immediately seemed to withdraw in to himself, his hair became smooth and the wind portal disappeared, and he bowed to her then left her alone.
Chihiro stood frozen to the spot.
Shocked, she stared at the wall of the cave.
The air was completely still. His presence was gone.
'Chi-san! There you are!' Rin came running up to her.
'Look! I got you an omamori, you can write any wish on it you like!'
Chihiro absently took the charm, and thanked Rin.
'Are you ok? Chi?'
Chihiro tried to snap out of it, and glanced at her friend, stammering; 'Y-yes - I just had a dizziness come over me. H-has - the teacher asked us to come back to the bus?'
'We have a few minutes left, so you can write your wish for the shrine if you want'
Chihiro looked at the blank bit of wood in her hand.
'I would rather keep this, and pray for what I wish instead, to God'
An anger boiled deep within her, an anger toward the lecturer.