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Jon had woken up in a shit mood.
After a weekend to escape the intensities and strangeness of his past week, he was unsurprisingly not ready to return to it. It wasn't even that he had a fantastic weekend, in fact it was quite similar to every weekend when he stayed in his tiny rented cottage near London. He watched Sam play on his Playstation and sometimes joined in, he went on long walks with Ghost, his husky, and those took up a huge portion of his weekend, he would visit the local weekend produce markets to purchase fresh food to cook for himself and he would end his weekend curled up in bed with a good book and Ghost by his side.
That weekend was much better than any moment from his upcoming week. He had dreaded seeing Daenerys since he stepped into the building, because then it would bring up his indecisiveness over what to do with what he saw – those touching hands.
He had thought about the hands more than he would have liked to. He knew deep down that he would sound paranoid if he ever spoke out to anyone about it and heck, he could even admit to himself he was being paranoid.
He knew that if he described what he saw, the simple act of someone pulling someone else into a taxi, the offering of a helping hand that it would sound like nothing, but they hadn't seen it. The look in Daario's eyes suggested it was so much more than just a helping hand. Or maybe what he was providing her was exactly that – a helping hand to win this competition and get the promotion.
He had even sent a text to Daenerys on Friday evening as some sort of 'I know you won't respond, because you're with Daario' type thing, but she had responded right away. The fact that he was even sending her a text with some sort of motive behind it, her replying instantly and the knowledge that he could never take this information to Tyrion, he decided he needed to block this all out of his head.
At the end of the day what did it matter to Jon what, or whom, she did? If anything was happening with Daario, then she was just using games and tactics to win this like he had thought she was doing all along. She would have lied when she said she wanted to be fair and what did it matter? Jon would still continue to be the same way with his head down and doing a good job then at the end of it all they would see what paid off more: being fair or playing games.
Jon didn't give a shit about Daario and Daenerys, it was just the fact that it wasn't fair. And yet, despite himself, he was able to block everything else out relating to it, but his mind kept drifting back to the fact that she had asked him for a drink that night. She wasn't supposed to be meeting up with Daario that night, they were supposed to be having a drink.
What would have happened if he had said yes?
It was only a tiny echo of a question in his head, but he knew as soon as he saw her it would be bouncing off the sides of his brain as if he was using a megaphone to voice the question.
He could breathe freely as he stood in the lift for she wasn't there. And she wasn't at her desk as he walked past it to approach Tyrion's office to get his briefing on what he was required to work on for his individual tasks this week and what his training schedule looked like.
Unfortunately his eyes glanced to Daario's office and there she was. The windows were so large for his office that it was like Daenerys was being displayed on a cinema screen for the rest of the office.
They were stood an appropriate distance apart, but he was looking at her with those eyes and that smile again. Her back was facing Jon, so he couldn't comment on anything, but the laugh that then escaped Daario made it clear that whatever the touching hands image meant, they were familiar. More familiar than you would ever expect the Head of Strategic Operations and a girl from Marketing to be.
He was now positioned right outside the office, not even staring in, as he zoned out completely, his mind wandering to all the thoughts he had stored in there over the weekend as if he was now able to begin thinking about them right then and there.
He could only make an estimate of how much time had passed before the door to the office flung open and that would be perhaps a full minute.
"Oh, Jon," She began smiling as she saw him, but seemed flustered, or was he just imagining that to fuel his paranoia? "Good morning."
"Morning, Daenerys." His eyes flickered back to the office and that action caused Daario to turn back to look at his desk. Had he really been just looking at Daenerys after she left the room? Such obvious behaviour! Or, again, was this just Jon making something out of nothing?
"How was your weekend?" She asked, maybe oblivious to Jon's staring at the office.
"Fine," He was over his weekend now that the problem was staring him right in the face. "What was that about?"
The smile on her face twitched a bit as if she was either completely surprised that Jon would ask such a thing or she had something to hide.
"What?" Her eyebrows closed in together in deeper confusion, before following Jon's gaze to Daario through the window. "Oh, I was just picking up the individual brief for the week."
"We're supposed to be getting it from Tyrion." She was clearly not thinking through her lies very well and instead just coming up with illogical excuses, but Jon was here to see the truth!
"Yes, but Tyrion isn't here until the afternoon." Daenerys now was looking pained to be under this line of questioning. "You should be getting yours from Daario as well if you want to be prepared."
It shouldn't have mattered to Jon whether or not Daario had something happening with Daenerys, but it did. He didn't want to face him right now, because he couldn't act like everything was okay; it was hard enough to pretend with Daenerys that he wasn't thinking about the fact that she had held Daario's hand and the other possibilities that could have led to – kissing, caressing and sex.
No, it shouldn't have mattered, but it did.
"I'll get it later," He replied, fully aware that he was returning to his gruff way of speaking to her.
He turned away from Daenerys, ready to walk in the other direction to his own desk, but her hand lightly pulled him back by the arm. She didn't look disturbed or angry by the way he was acting and instead was smiling up at him.
"So… shall I come get you later when it's time to go to the venue?"
Hmm… he had forgotten of the small, tiny problem of spending time alone with her to look at the potential venue. That wouldn't be a tense time under these circumstances at all.
"Of course," He said, attempting to return her smile, but most likely doing a terrible job at it.
He walked away, already practically filled with dread for the day ahead.
She didn't turn up until 10:35 and Jon had made a small attempt to look for her, as in he looked at her desk and hadn't seen her there, so for a few blissful minutes he thought he might just have to call up the venue and say they couldn't make it. 10:35 rolls up and there she is looking as corporate as ever with a tablet in hand and what looked like a modern day version of a briefcase.
"Well, shall we set off?" She said as way of greeting, giving a polite smile to the colleagues around Jon. They were still confused by her popping by seeing as until last week she never set foot around this part of the office.
Jon didn't know how Daenerys expected to get to the venue in time. The hotel they were looking at was at least four stops by tube and that seemed impossible to Jon, but he nodded nevertheless and grabbed his thick coat that was far too much of a winter coat for the beginning of September.
They walked in silence to the lift as Jon pulled out his phone, pretending to read something extremely important and he noticed that Daenerys started to look at her tablet now as well. He put it away in his pocket too soon as he was now faced with the prospect of enduring the awkward lift ride without entertainment.
"How was the night with your family?" Jon was taken aback by her sudden attention to him instead of her tablet that it took him several moments to remember that lie he had told. She noticed the lack of response and raised her head quizzically at him.
"Uh... yeah, it was fine, I mean, good." She gave him a bemused sort of smile and Jon turned back to look straight ahead of him, reminding himself to never lie again.
When they started walking out the building, Jon automatically began walking in the direction of the nearest tube station, but Daenerys wasn't following.
"Jon?" She called, causing him to turn to see her approaching the taxi stand that was located just outside their office.
"I thought we would be getting the tube." Daenerys waved a hand dismissively.
"Oh, we're running late, we'll never make it in time." As Jon still didn't move, she motioned for him to come over. "Come on."
Reluctantly Jon followed her. He hated riding in any sort of car, he had since... Well, it had been a long time since he had hated it, but at least now it only brought on a mild case of anxiety and unwanted flashbacks.
He got in the taxi after Daenerys and she had clearly already given the address as they started driving off almost immediately. He hurriedly buckled himself in before they started making any real movements and he had to focus on something inside the taxi instead of being forced to look out the window. Unfortunately for him his eyes immediately latched on to the practically glowing hair of Daenerys.
It was calming for a moment to stare at her hair as she stared out the window, but then he noticed her seatbelt wasn't done up. Before considering what he was doing, he reached over and tugged on it, bringing it over her shoulder.
"Oh," She turned, shocking him with how close their faces were in this strange positioning. After a moment of his hand resting on her shoulder with their eyes locked, she broke it by pulling on her seatbelt. "Thank you."
He decided to stare at his hands for the rest of their journey.
"And as you can see the view is absolutely spectacular from this point."
The viewing was going into more detail than Jon had ever imagined; he now knew how much a champagne reception would cost, that all food could be turned into a miniature version for canapes and that event spaces had several different lighting options and what you chose for your event was a critical decision.
All Jon had really been able to tell was that it was an incredibly nice venue for an event and if he had turned up here he would be impressed by it. It was the top floor of one of the nicer hotels in London; they would have access to the bar, a room of suitable sizing for them to dine in and this view that she was referring to.
Jon was suddenly very glad for having Daenerys there, because she seemed to know the exact things to ask and he could tell her notes regarding it were going to be meticulous, whereas Jon was writing things down like 'Drinks? Little food?' and not saying anything particularly stimulating. The lady showing them around though still looked to Jon for his point of view on things and he had no idea why – maybe it was because it was him who had arranged this.
"Yes," It was all Jon could say as he looked outside at the spectacular view she was talking about.
"Apart from that construction work over there." Daenerys commented, pointing out across the skyline to where some bulky construction took over London's buildings. She went back to making a note of it and Jon gave a little smile as the events co-ordinator, Laura, clearly didn't know what to say about that comment.
"Okay, I think we should hold the reception drinks in the foyer, spilling out into here for the view," There was a special stress in her voice as she said that word, so it was clear that was no accident. "And we can display what we want on the screens here I'm assuming?"
"Yes, you can send us whatever you want displaying on here." Daenerys was making the most of the room by walking around and pointing out the things they would be using on the night. She was clearly very comfortable in this setting and Jon felt that he should be learning from her, but it was mainly just going over his head.
"That should work then." She looked over expectantly at Jon for approval as well and so he just gave a brief nod.
"Yes, Jon, what do you think of that? Is there anything else you would like to see?" Laura was once more giving her full attention to Jon when Daenerys was walking and speaking like she was in charge of this operation. Jon was just confused by this, but it clearly grated on Daenerys' nerves.
"Laura," She began, clearly meaning her voice to come off as intimidating as it did. "Why don't you get us those brochures you promised with the pricing on?"
"Oh, yes," Laura looked between Jon and Daenerys, realizing she was doing something wrong here and now wanting to be as helpful as possible. "I'll be back in just a minute then."
Daenerys waited until Laura had walked around the corner of the bar before sighing and walking right up to the glass to look down over London. He was positioned near the window as well, but staring at her rather than the view.
These moments were very difficult to figure out with her. Jon wasn't one for talking without necessity, but when they would be in silence he felt like something had to be said. He found her uneasy to be around when they were talking, but in silence it was worse because then he had to wonder what she was thinking about. He weirdly found himself wanting to know what was going on in her head, because ultimately that was so much better than not knowing.
"Do you think she gets commission for getting a man to sign the contract rather than a woman? Or do we think she likes you?" She turned from the window to look at him then, that small smirk quirking upwards at the very last second.
He didn't know why Daenerys would make a comment like that, but the unexpectedness of it all made him laugh. She let out a rather dramatic gasp and pointed at him.
"Oh my God, did you just laugh?" Although there was only a few feet of distance between them at the glass, she began walking by the glass to get even closer to him – forcing him to look deep into those purple eyes. "Jon Snow can laugh?"
He let out another laugh and this caused a beautiful reaction of her also laughing. Those eyes practically sparkled when she laughed. Despite all his concerns regarding her, that moment allowed him to just think about her face and it was the best part of his day.
"I laugh," He said, smiling with ease at her now.
She took another step, apparently testing the water with how close she could stand in front of him. She was standing as close as they were when they had their first argument and now there was a whole other type of tension between them.
"Well, if I hadn't seen that just now, I would have called that a myth." As he was getting so lost in her eyes, he couldn't avoid noticing how her eyes flitted between his eyes and, what appeared to be, his lips. This distracted him from anything she was saying.
"Not a myth," Maybe repeating her would be sufficient for this moment.
"I feel honoured to make you laugh." She was leaning forwards, eyes still flitting as before. "Especially when you appear to be in a particularly bad mood today."
Her lips were in a perfect smile and her face was getting nearer to his. He wanted to be lost in that moment like before, but his mind wouldn't let him. He wondered what would have happened if he had let her continue moving forwards. It was wrong to let her though.
Her telling him he had been in a bad mood had brought him back to reality. He remembered why he had been in a bad mood and it was ultimately all because of her. Her eyes were closing and his voice broke through what could have an unexpectedly perfect moment.
"What's going on between you and Daario?"
Everything happened slowly after that. Her eyes opened and stayed opened, comprehending what he was asking. He could see from her eyes that she was deciding whether to laugh it off or take it seriously, but his expression was staring back at him in the reflection of her eyes and he knew she would take that expression seriously.
She blinked, looking almost tearful, which was shocking enough, and paired with the fact that her voice crackled inconsistently as she spoke, he was blown over by this new image of Daenerys that stood before him.
"How long have you known?"
That question said it all. His paranoia was correct and she was admitting it. He finally looked away from her eyes as looking at them made him wish that he never had an inkling of knowledge about them.
"Okay, I have a selection of…" Laura's voice came in from the other side of the room, sounding more confused as she went on. Daenerys quickly turned to look back out of the window, leaving Jon with the task of dealing with this. "A selection of our pricing lists."
The girl tentatively approached Jon and he received them from her.
"Thank you, I think that's everything for now. We'll be in touch later today."
Laura looked puzzled, like she had more that needed to be said, but Jon didn't give her the time to say it. He reached out to shake her hand and then started walking to the lift.
"Thank you." He heard Daenerys say behind him, but he didn't look back to see how close she was behind him.
"Jon," The soft voice said behind him followed by the urgent sound of her heels right behind him. The sound grew more urgent as he reached the lift and pressed the button to call it.
He could see her out of the corner of his eye, but he didn't want to focus on her right now. He didn't know what he wanted to do. She stopped by him, but so did an employee from the hotel who looked like they wanted to use the lift as well, and so she remained silent.
The lift came and they all got in. Jon pressed for the lobby, whereas the employee pressed for just a few floors below them. He didn't particularly want to spend time alone with Daenerys right now, especially in a lift where any conversation they had would be more intense.
The tension between them felt so palpable that Jon thought that the employee in the lift must have felt it too. He didn't dare look at Daenerys throughout all this, but the sound of her heavy breathing was unmistakable.
Eventually the lift arrived at the floor for the employee and they got out quickly. Daenerys marched forward to the control panel as soon as the doors shut again. What could she need to be doing there?
"What are you doing?" Jon asked, trying to look around her to see exactly what she had pressed, but she turned around at the same time to block his view. "Did you press emergency stop?"
It was a very rhetorical question as it became apparent by the jolting stop that she had indeed pressed this button. Jon wanted to get out of the lift as quickly as possible and Daenerys seemed to want to stay in there as long as possible.
"How long have you known?" She didn't look as upset or surprised by the situation this time she asked it. Instead she was forceful in the fact that she needed to know.
He tried to get around her to get the lift moving again, but Daenerys pushed in front of him, almost challenging him to try.
"How long has this being going on?" Jon countered, unsure why it was even necessary for him to know, but wanting to know all the same.
Daenerys looked away, clearly not wanting to give an answer, but the space was so small between them that he could see her expression as she answered.
"A while... A year or so."
That was why he wanted to know; he had wanted to know that it wasn't serious and to know that he wasn't imagining before that there might be… something between them.
A year though. That was a serious amount of time. They had a relationship and her pressing herself near him was just all a game. Her and Daario probably laughed over the fact that she had invited him for a drink on Friday. Thank fuck he had declined that offer. She would never find out that he had practically chased her out of the building to take her up on the invite.
"I saw you getting in the same taxi as him on Friday." Daenerys let out a small laugh as if she had just realized that he couldn't have seen anything too incriminating.
"It's nothing." She looked back up at him, signature smirk planted on her face as she tried to play it off.
"I didn't know if it was anything but your answer already confirmed it." At the reminder that she had sealed her own fate, Daenerys grew quiet.
Jon didn't want to even continue on in this conversation – he realized now he knew it was serious that he didn't need to hear anymore and that reason was clear to him. All this time he had been paranoid as to what was going on and that's because he was hoping he was wrong. He was hoping there was still some chance something could eventually happen between him and her.
Now it was off the table.
"Have you told anyone yet?" He couldn't ignore the slight desperation in her voice even though she was trying to be her straight-talking self.
"No..." Even with this declaration he didn't know if there was any point in telling anyone. "You know it would be bad though. It looks -,"
"I'm sleeping with management. Of course I know how this looks. But it's not like that."
It wasn't like that because it was serious for her. It was just him that she was trying to make a fool of. He was the pawn in her game. Asking him for drinks, her coming close to him, those purple eyes…
It got him mad.
"Yeah, it might be serious, but the way you were acting with me…" He didn't want to directly refer to the way he felt they had been getting closer, because maybe it was all in his head. "All this shit – it's not a game? What was going on just now and all this -,"
"No!" The word left her so fast that his eyes were drawn back to hers, suddenly caring about what was coming next. "Sure when we first started I thought it would be beneficial to my career, but it's just sex. It is nothing."
Jon couldn't process anything for a moment, because the word 'sex' had left her beautiful lips, but when he could process what was going on he realized she didn't acknowledge what Jon said about her and Jon, so there he was dangling in a bubble of hope once more; she still thought her relationship with Daario was nothing.
However this brought up new problems. She was now playing a game with Daario? Couldn't that still mean she was doing the exact same thing with him?
"And before you say anything, he told me himself he can't help me get the promotion."
Every single argument or conversation they had came down to the fucking promotion. They could never escape that. And even if it was a conversation, it would normally turn into an argument, because she would say stupid shit like that.
"Can't help you get it? Really? So when Tyrion asks for his opinion he's going to give a completely fair answer?"
Jon was using his arms more to talk – a sign he was getting riled up – and as they were stood so close in the lift, it was difficult to not touch her as he was using his hands to motion. Daenerys took a while to respond, opening her mouth once before closing it again.
"He wouldn't ask for his opinion on the final decision!" She was wagging her finger as her voice grew louder, as if she was finding the whole idea of that ridiculous.
"He would, because that's what leaders do. They can't do things without knowing how their advisors feel." Jon spoke softer this time, not feeling the need to match her voice when he felt he was speaking more sense than she was.
"Look he said he wouldn't help me and I have to trust that." She was dismissive in her tone and Jon was about to say something back when she sighed and met his eyes with that same teary eyed expression as before. "I don't want to do anything with him anymore because... because things are different now. He wouldn't help me, but I'm sure he would sabotage me."
Because things are different now? Was that about the promotion or wanting something more or, dare he even think it, maybe about the possibility of them? That couldn't be it.
Jon had to get that thought out of his head in order to not scream out 'just leave him!' and give a logical solution to her dilemma.
"That's a risk to take then if you want to be fair like you claimed." She sighed again, turning away from him to begin a strange pacing of the small floor that was available to her.
"Don't you see I'm damned if I do and screwed if I don't? I keep things as they are then I'm being hard on him, because when... If I win he wants a relationship so I'd have to end it anyway and then it's hard on you and I risk getting caught or you just telling Tyrion yourself. If I end it then I'm screwing myself over."
She was using her hands now to express how shit her dilemma was. He didn't feel any anger towards her anymore. Bad people who intentionally used others didn't sound like that.
He didn't know what advice to give her without being biased, so he simply said;
"I won't tell Tyrion."
She stopped pacing then and looked up at him once more. Something shifted in that moment between them.
Maybe him displaying that much trust to Daenerys would discourage her from messing around with him.
Of course this also meant that if she didn't want to mess him around more then he wouldn't get to stare at those purple eyes with such intensity anymore or he wouldn't get that close to her lips again.
He had to do the right thing though.
"You won't?"
He nodded.
"You've got a hard enough decision to make without me doing anything."
"Jon, that's too..." She shook her head, biting her lip before finishing her train of thought. "I probably wouldn't do the same if things were reversed."
"I'd like to think you would." He didn't want to believe that she was telling the truth with saying that. She couldn't be that ruthless when it came down to it, could she? "Any way you look at it though you're using him - sex, promotion - I think the best decision is the less selfish one."
Okay, so that piece of advice was a bit more biased, but he did feel slightly bad that Daario was obliviously wanting a relationship and she was claiming she didn't see it as anything more than a no strings attached arrangement.
Selfishly though – making his advice more ironic – it was obviously better for him for both prospects with his job and Daenerys if she chose to end things.
"That's usually the harder one." She let out an awkward laugh after saying that.
He leaned across her and pressed the emergency stop button again. The lift jolted into action and they started speeding down to the ground floor.
"Good management practice." He smiled at her and she smiled back.
That was dangerous. He immediately stopped smiling. He couldn't be around her when she was still with Daario.
"I'm going to take the tube, you can take a taxi." He said as soon as the lift doors opened.
"Okay." Her voice reminded him of when he had turned her down for drinks. The surprise and the small tinge of hurt were present here too.
He walked out the lift doors, not wanting to say bye, because saying bye would make him want to stay with her. He thought he had created enough distance between them until he heard a familiar urgent stepping behind him on the streets.
"Jon!" He turned and she stopped, leaving quite a bit of distance between them. "Even if you think I'm playing a game with him, I don't want you to think I am with you."
She didn't wait to hear if he had anything to say back, and truthfully he didn't know what he would say to that, she just nodded her head and turned in the opposite direction.
He watched after her for a moment and saw her turn her head back around to glance at him once more before he headed in the other direction towards the tube station.
He couldn't believe that after that kind of conversation he was smiling, but there he was smiling.