A slamming door right before her nose - just one more fabulous incident on this beautiful autumn morning. The reborn woman's splendid mood that day wasn't due only to the fact it rained cats and dogs. There was also one little matter of Minato and Kushina going on a mission. At first she was even happy because it meant spending three whole days with her favorite Sannin, who somewhere between their shared dinners and the last saving escapade, became Shiori's nanny on demand. However, when Minato and she went to his laboratory the serpent man was nowhere in sight. It appeared he had been suddenly sent on an unexpected mission and that raised two troubling thoughts in the young Uzumaki's mind.

Firstly – Minato didn't know about it and he just came back from Hokage's office. Shiori was aware Hiruzen wasn't the youngest lad, but she doubted he had such severe sclerosis to forget mentioning this tiny detail. In truth, Orochimaru had no official obligations towards Namikaze and his little ward but all concerned sites knew better. So, if Hokage wasn't the one who sent the Sannin away, who else could it been? No one else than the freaking Danzo! Orochimaru still worked for this substitute of a human being, doing god knows what, even when she gave him so much scientific facts and methods; and that irritated her to no ends! He was a freaking genius, screw this, he was the freaking genius. How could he be so imbecilic to associate himself with that bandaged monster?

Secondly – maybe it was petty of her but why didn't the Sannin say goodbye to her? Was it too much to let her know he would be out of town, doing something amoral, what could probably lead to his death? Was it too much to ask from him? She was worried, damn it! Not that she wouldn't be worried otherwise but still… it vexed her to no ends!

And now she was nearly struck in the nose! And by who? By Uchiha freaking adorable Itachi, that's who! He opened the door and seeing who was standing in his doorstep, apologized, asked them to wait a moment and shut the door with a bang.

"Well, that was… odd?" Mumbled Minato, improving his grip on the reddening girl in his arms, who looked as if her brain might boil and burst out of her ears at any second.

"I still don't understand why I can't stay alone. I would be alright." she hissed through clenched teeth.

Before the jonin's blue eyes flew a sequence of images showing Konoha in various stages of destruction, but in every one of them a little, giggling redhead was standing in the middle of it.

"It's for your own good, Shiori-chan". Answered Minato, omitting the detail that it's also (or more likely especially) for the good of all around. "Besides, Mikoto-san is a great cook. It would be shame to not take the chance and try her food."

This reasoning seemed to subdue Shiori, who in fact had to talk with Fugaku, no matter how reluctant she was about it. What was wrong if as a recompense for her stress, she could eat something delicious?

As if summoned by their thoughts the Uchiha matron appeared in the doorway.

"I'm so sorry! I have no idea what possessed him." She apologized clearly as much embarrassed by her son's unusual behavior as intrigued by it. "Please, come in."

After they left their muddy boots in the hallway (Shiori's were rather clean because she flatly refused wading through the puddles) Mikoto went up the stairs losing no time to check Itachi's strange manners. Not knowing what to do being left in the hallway, Minato followed the woman, willy-nilly taking Shiori with him. What befell them on the upper floor was indeed an interesting view.

Itachi was trying to hide the protesting Shisui, wrapping him in a futon like curd in a pancake. At the same time throwing weapons and scrolls that were lying around to a cabinet.

"Itachi-san, what are you doing? It isn't funny." Rasped the older of the boys, who now was almost fully wrapped in the mattress.

"I need to clean up the room, before senpai will see it."

"But why are you cleaning me out of here?"

Itachi's eyes were as enigmatic as a black hole, not betraying even the slightest thought; not that Shisui had time to contemplate them while being violently immersed in the depths of bedding.

"Itachi, I let Shisui-kun sleepover not for you to smother him in the morning. It is rude. Even more than leaving our new guests outside." No matter how disapproving his mother's words were, her tone showed nothing more than amusement.

"I'm sorr…" the boy paused all activities, for the first time noticing the blond man.

"No way." Itachi's astonishment was undoubtedly shared with the second Uchiha youngster, who managed to put out his curly head and now was openly gawking. "You are the Yellow Flash, aren't you?"

It was Minato's turn to be as red as Uzumaki's hair. The man was indecently modest for someone so famous.

"That's my Mini-nii." Shiori answered for him, having nothing against soaking in his glory.

"He's your brother?" Shisui got out of the futon and now was doing everything not to start bouncing around his idol.

"Being precise, he's my cousin's fiancé. But he's more like a daddy to me than an older brother." explained the girl bluntly, not realizing what her words caused in the blond man's heart.

Itachi wasn't surprised by the redhead's relations with one of Konoha's biggest heroes. His senpai was great so it was totally logical for her to have a great father figure, but it still hadn't explained their presence in his home.

"I do not want to seem dissatisfied with their visit, mother, but what are Shiori senpai and Namikaze-sama doing here?"

Mikoto's grin could only be described as worrisome.

"I wanted it to be a surprise. Shiori-chan is going to stay with us for a few days. It is great, right?"

The little boy's mouth formed a perfect o while his eyes focused on the girl as if to verify it. At her rather lame attempt to smile he blushed and quickly turned his head away.

Normally seeing it Minato's brain would be in overdrive but for now everything he could think of was one word. Daddy bounced off inside his skull, causing on the surface something what Kushina fondly named as Namikaze's special funky, dopey smile.

Ω

For the first time in a while Shiori could wholeheartedly tell she was full. With a small hand, she patted her belly. Mikoto's onigri truly was splendid, and for some unfathomable reason the woman made too much of it even for an army, so for once the girl didn't have to limit herself.

"Shiori-chan, do you want seconds?" The black-haired woman's voice asked, coming from the kitchen below.

"Rather sixth." Murmured Shisui, suspiciously looking at Uzumaki's belly. It had to be some sort of special power, only Akimichi could eat so much without exploding, and even they were fat, while Shiori was only slightly on the chubby side.

"It is her seventh." Corrected Itachi, happily munching his third portion, while the girl loudly declined his mother's offer.

The children were scattered on the floor in Itachi's room eating lunch, surrounded by mountains of scrolls and books about fuinjutsu, which Shiori brought alongside plenty of other necessary things (like three sets of clothes for each day; personal, super-fluffy pillow and something that looked suspiciously like a teddy Orochimaru).

Uchiha's heir swallowed his last bite. He was happy. He couldn't remember when was the last time he felt like that. Probably never, especially considering that he wasn't in his parent's company but with two young kids. Itachi's experience with other children so far wasn't good. They didn't like him, calling him names and sometimes even threw stones at him. They weren't bad, they just couldn't understand him. He was stronger, smarter, more mature; in other words, he was better and so he was alone.

Two onyx disks focused on his companions.

Shisui was quietly explaining the fuinjutsu basics he had learned in the academy. The curly haired boy was smart and kind, and for the first time Itachi was sure that somebody entirely understood him. Well, at the beginning he wanted to spend time with the older Uchiha to prevent the Uzumaki girl from befriending him, but later he simply liked it. Shisui was older but treated Itachi on a par with himself; he wasn't disregarding nor glorifying the younger boy. There was respect between them, but not the kind that you get from someone who wants something from you without giving anything in return. It was the respect from two persons who truly understood what they bring to the situation, that were worthy and worthwhile. The two of them truly were alike.

Shiori senpai wasn't like him or Shisui. She was different but what was more important she treated him differently. For her he wasn't genius, clan heir nor future s-rank shinobi; the girl didn't want him to be any of them. For her Itachi was a normal, smart, four-year-old boy. No one ever before treated him like that, not in the patronizing way but as a child who should laugh and cry, not caring about more important matters than sweets and toys. Everybody else anticipated something from him, even Shisui. Uphold the Uchiha name in one arm? Push back the tide of history with a single scoring glance? And many other equally impossible deeds. Shiori was his emotional morphine, dulling the unforgiving world.

The redhead was slightly older than him and far more knowledgeable in many things, so she took care of him without expectations; for her it was natural and he liked it. However, Shiori was vulnerable in many ways. Contrary to her mind her body was weak, she couldn't mold chakra or even properly throw kunai even if her life depended on it. So, it was natural for him to take care of her. He was hers and she was his as it should be.

It had to be what people called bonds. That warm feeling of belonging somewhere with someone, and Itachi felt he belonged to this room with these two, his first true friends. He also felt something poking his forehead. He blinked and followed two chubby fingers with his gaze which were pointed between his brows.

"He reacted. You think he is back?" asked concerned Shisui, whose head materialized just before his nose.

"Tachi-chan's like our washing machine. If it crashes, you need to hit it." Said the girl and for good measure poked him one more time.

"I was just thinking, that is all."

"That's all." Shiori corrected automatically, officially on a crusade against Itachi's too proper speech pattern.

"So, will you do it?" Asked Mikoto standing in the doorway, who had to come when he was immersed in his thoughts. "It would be a real shame if all the food go to waste. You can take at least some for Fugaku to the police station."

The asking was naturally only rhetorical and no more than five minutes later the children were wading through Konoha's muddy streets. Shiori further pulled a cap over her ears, in the face of cold wind not caring about far too big pompom on top of it. Sitting piggyback on Shisui's shoulders she was in better situation than the boys, who already had wet shoes. She eyed them with sympathy, that after a while evolved into annoyance. These kids weren't walking through the puddles; they were walking ON them! It wasn't fair, these two were so tiny, they shouldn't be able to do it, especially when she couldn't.

Despite all her objections to go out in this weather, the reborn woman managed to turn it to her advantage. When Mikoto lamented over wasted food, Shiori was enlightened and asked if she could take the leftovers. True be told when she saw how much "leftovers" were in the fridge, she thanked heavens she had a sealing scroll, otherwise she would need a mule pull. And so, after they went to the police station and gave the food to a Uchiha orderly officer, they headed towards their new destination to with Shiori very carefully opened the door.

"It's clear." She breathed with relief.

"And what could have been here?" Shisui had no idea what could be worse than a nurse, who chased them a moment ago, seeing their mud-covered shoes and wet patches they left behind.

"A pack of filthy, drooling mutts."

"My dogs aren't filthy." From the hospital bed announced the teenager, whose face would show an expression of repulsion caused by the need to endlessly repeat the same thing, if it was visible. Nevertheless, his voice couldn't hide his irritation. "What do you want this time and who are they?"

"I've brought you something and they're beginning of my cohort."

Kakashi blinked.

"There is so much disturbing things within this sentence, I won't even start." He mumbled and encountering hostile eyes of the smaller boy, he refocused his attention on the redhead, who now climbed onto his bed and pulled out a sealing scroll to give it to him. "What is this? A bomb?"

"It's Tachi-chan's mum's onigri; it's yummy. And why would I give you a bomb?"

The young jonin nearly said that he deserved it, but in the last second he bit his tongue; lately he did it more often than he liked. Kakashi seemed to be quite calm and composed, at least until someone noticed that he avoided his own eyes in a mirror.

"You can call it a hunch." He mumbled instead.

"More likely shinobi paranoia." Corrected the girl, whose words were the last sounds before the room became painfully silent.

The reborn woman wanted to kill something. How was it possible that she, the most antisocial person at her university and later in the lab, was now surrounded by even more screwed up people? They're children, shouldn't they babble pointlessly and gain friends in a second? More importantly, why her every idea was ending as an immense disaster? Sure, her plan to create connection between Itachi and Kakashi, the same day she intended to ask Fugaku for permission to fix Obito's eye, was as subtle as punch in the inner ear but she cared about results, not subtlety. She was five-year-old Uzumaki, anything else would be suspicious, well, more suspicious that she already was.

"Are you Hatake Kakashi?" asked the older black-haired boy, while the other looked ready to bolt through the window. "And Namikaze-sama is your sensei? That must be great. I'm Uchiha Shisui and that is my cousin Itachi-san."

Kakashi was on a brink of stroke. Not only that tiny monster brought Obito's two clansmen, who should hate him for principle alone. She also… it was too terrible to even think about it, so he just asked to end his misery.

"You kidnapped Uchiha heir?"

"Eeeh?" Two golden pools blinked. "I've kidnaped no one. Tachi-chan is mine."

To prove her point the girl patted place next to her on Kakashi's bed and Itachi reluctantly but nonetheless sat there and for good measure took her hand.

"See?"

The silver-haired jonin indeed saw and that scared him even more. Especially the part where she was speaking about the two boys omitting the friend part, as if they were her toys.

"Kakashi-kun. I… oh, I didn't know you have visitors." Rin that just waltzed to the hospital room seemed to shine. "Hello, Shiori-chan and?"

"Uchiha Shisui and Itachi, we're friends of Shiori-san, kunoichi-san." The answer flew out of the boy's mouth drawn to single sincere smile.

After their introduction Rin and Shisui chattered for few minutes that the reborn woman spent on plotting the best ways to corner Fugaku. However fruitless, it was the only useful thing she could do now; which was interrupted by Itachi towing her to the door.

"What? What are we doing? Where are we going?"

"We are going to visit Obito-san's grandmother." Declared Shisui, claiming her other hand. "Rin senpei was on her way there, and she said Nobuko-obaa-san would be delighted to see you. She isn't feeling well. You should visit her." The last sentence was muttered with conviction of rightfulness and knowledge that it was the last thing Shiori wanted to do. Because seriously, Shiori wasn't anyone too important in Obito's life but Rin was the reason he died. Calling the situation awkward would be putting it mildly. "Don't worry, Shiori-san, we'll be with you all the time."

"But I don't want to go." Protested the girl, trying to drive her feet in the ground. "And Rin shouldn't. I don't know if you're aware but it's her fault Nobuko-san grandson is dead."

"But what if that lady just does not want to be alone?" Asked Itachi, tilting his head and blinking that adorable black eyes.

These two kids were devious.

"She doesn't want to" Shiori corrected mindlessly his flawless grammar, letting them drag her whenever they liked. This was going to be the most uncomfortable visit she ever witnessed.

Ω

Nobuko-san was in far worse state that Shiori imagined. Bedridden, sickly pale with cracking voice; she joked that only her eyes were still young as befitted a true Uchiha. The reborn woman didn't have it in herself to deny it. Obito's grandmother was weeks older than in the day Shiori meet her, but her grandson death had taken years from her lifespan; changing vibrant, quirky grandma in tired of life old woman.

She was happy seeing them, even Rin who apparently visited many times before. Shiori didn't know if the medical kunoichi had been doing it to silence her conscience or if she sincerely wanted to take care of Obito's last direct family. Maybe both?

The petite Uzumaki once more glanced at a goggle Nobuko-san gave her. It was an old pair with scraped, faded paint and little cracked on the left eyepiece. Shiori ran a finger along the inside of the strap, where few black letters announced the name of their owner to the world. Could she one day give them back to Obito and genuinely smile knowing what she did?

"That's my house." Shisui took her off from his shoulders and gently put on the ground.

Its look hadn't improved Shiori's already somber mood. It wasn't because it was a shack, no matter how small and clearly unkempt it was, with patched roof and bunch of young, LOUD children running around. The main sore point was a man standing before it with the kids.

"What the hell? What is he doing here?"

"Are you talking about Danzo-sama?"

Instead of the confirmation the girl shoved them into the nearby bushes.

"You two know him?"

To her relief Itachi denied but Shisui only nodded.

"Danzo-sama was my grandfather teammate. After mum and dad went MIA at the beginning of the war, Danzo-sama has been helping Tamiko oba-san take care of me and her kids."

"This guy is nothing but bad news." Muttered Shiori trying to change the old bat it a torch with her gaze. Sadly, it wasn't happening.

"Is he an enemy?" Itachi knew it was unwise to dismiss Shiori senpai's warnings.

"He's one of the Village Elders." Deadpanned Shisui.

"That doesn't mean he can't be bad!"

"Who can't be bad?" Asked male voice over their heads.

The children jumped and the girl could scream only because she bit her tongue a second before.

"Danzo-sama…" Started curly haired boy.

"Idea." Finished Shiori, gaining back her voice, however squeaky it sounded. "Shisui wanted to ask if he can spend one more night with Tachi-chan and me. I told him it was bad idea. I just wanted to go. I was afraid his aunty won't let him. And hello to you to, Danzo-sama. Didn't your mummy taught you, that it's wrong to sneak like that?"

The five-year-old smiled but it wasn't so bright due to her recent nerve breakdown and growing teeth. Her grimace confronted face full of kindness and good humor in which the reborn woman could believe if she didn't know better.

"Shisui-kun was right, Shiori-chan. You need to ask, otherwise Tamiko-san would be worried. And it's true, my mother though me that but later my jonin sensei taught me it's what shinobi do."

"Well, I don't wanna be ninja so for me it seems silly." The little redhead had a sadistic pleasure seeing cracks on Danzo's perfect mask.

"You don't want to serve the Village? It's the biggest honor..."

"Nuh uh, I wanna be a seal-master and Mini-nii and Kushina-nee-chan are alright with it. I will do all sorts of powerful tags to help Tachi-chan, Shisui and Orochimaru-sama. I'll be better even than my granny."

For the more direct "piss of from them or I'll blow up your brain" she would have to tattoo it on his forehead. It wasn't wise, but the man worked on her as a red rag to a bull. Nothing decreased her intellectual capability like fear and anger put together.

Shisui had to read her like a book, and the next chapter titled "antagonizing the creep" wasn't to his liking so he took over.

"Danzo-sama, do you think I can go with them?"

"I believe so…"

"Thanks, Danzo-sama." And they were gone, not stopping until they reached Itachi's room (after two streets the older boy had to carry her because muscles in Shiori's legs went on strike).

"Uzumaki, are you mad?" Hissed Shisui, throwing her onto the floor.

"Probably more than you can imagine." The reborn woman droned and frustrated bit her lip. She had an idea but at the same time, prayed to a first god ready to hear her, that she was wrong. Hell, she just had to know. "Shisui, did Danzo-sama in any way sent you to Itachi?"

The eight-year-old went silent.

"He… I believe he told my aunt that I should befriend Itachi-san if I got a chance. I doubt she would agree to let me here if not for that. She's very proud woman; not wanting help from anyone."

"He's a grownup and old war mongrel. I doubt someone like him does anything without ulterior reasons." Shiori knew she was right. She was using them right now.

"So he's an enemy." Concluded Itachi from the beginning knowing his senpai was correct.

"Let's call him person of interest. For now," Agreed Shisui, ruffling younger boy's black mop.

"Shisui-san, stop it."

"I don't think so, Tachi-chan."

In cascades of laughter the reborn woman like a mantra repeated that she was doing all this only for her own good. No matter how adorable those two miniature Uchihas were, she wasn't developing any sentiments toward them. Complete, zero, null, nada, nothing at all.

Right?

OMAKE

Few days after Shiori and Itachi went back to Konoha.

The reborn woman liked fluffy things. Many times, buying toys for kids in her family, she wished to be younger. So, plushy things were alright but if they were also pink, glittering and/or with lace it was a little too much. Now, standing in front of rows of shelfs containing similar trinkets, she dragged her suffering gaze to the serpent man standing next to her.

"With all due respect, Orochimaru-sama, but what are we doing here?"

"As I've told once already, you can choose one thing from here that I'll provide. I think back there are toys more to your liking." He said, nonchalantly pointing to the rear of the store.

Shiori following his advice ventured into toy store's unknown depths. After fifteen minutes of digging through plushy mountains from which one snake caught her fancy, the girl noticed the sannin's sadistic smile blossoming, while viewing two of his summons tearing into pieces something disturbingly resembling a teddy Jiraiya. There was a whole pile of these monstrosities… just next to a smaller pile of something with black hair.

Orochimaru cringed hearing Shiori's squeal. She jumped into his arms at the same time shoving something soft into his face.

"I wanna this one! I gonna luv him to death. Pleas, pretty pleas." She begged with childish voice.

Serpent eyes focused on… of course it had to be it. That pintsize devil just had to find chibi him. Inspecting how the girl squeezed and cuddled the toy the man involuntarily winced. Thank gods he wasn't in its place.

"On one condition, child. You shall not speak like that ever again."

"Naturally, Orochimaru-sama. I promise. It's just… you're so cute!"

"Cute?"

"Of course. Just look at your big eyes, and that quirk on your lips, and that tiny hands."

Orochimaru groaned. It was official, like the rest of his companions the child was mental.

My wonderful readers, thanks for reading the next piece of my story. I hope you liked it and that you won't need to wait so long for following chapters (yes, I know it's up to me but, hell, life hapens. You know what I mean ^^ )

And in the end but not the least: Hail to my lovely beta, mrsmiawallace88, who I adore dearly.