Since Dean went to fetch the car and Sam was securing Meg, Cas decided to help Bobby pack whatever the old man needed so they could head out. His place simply wasn't safe anymore. Despite everything that happened, Cas felt a little subdued. Detached, as if the events of today had been something he had seen on TV and didn't really happen to them. To him.

Everything was just… Muted.

Bobby sent him to get some pre-prepared duffels from his closet and Cas obediently went, picking up four bags and carrying them downstairs to the porch. The Impala was right outside, running, but there was no Dean in sight. Knowing he could just open the truck and place the bags there, Cas decided to leave them on the porch. He had no idea why, really. Just that he didn't want to be the one to put them in the trunk.

As he stepped back into the (now ruined) kitchen, Bobby emerged from his study, over a dozen books in his arms. Cas quickly stepped forward to help him, taking half and putting it in a bag Bobby pointed out. There was also another bag filled with some ingredients and weapons and Castiel remembered that he had given Dean his blade during the fight. Something within him demanded he go to find Dean and retrieve it.

There was no need. Only a few feet away, on the kitchen counter, lay both his and Ishim's blade along with the Colt and the Kurdish blade. Cas got up, picked up his blade and tucked it into the sleeve of his shirt. Well, not really his, it was Dean's, some of the clothes he had at Bobby's. Cas had to wear that because all of his things were left back at their house when they ran, and it wouldn't be very wise to go back for any of it.

Dean stepped inside and proclaimed they were all set, then asked Bobby where they were headed.

"A friend of mine has a house up in the–"

"No. We should move west and find a motel to stay at, at least until we deal with Meg," Sam interrupted before Bobby could disclose the location. Cas could see them all glancing in Meg's direction before both Bobby and Dean nodded.

"There is an abandoned building on the I90, just after Mitchel, we could use that. Save some cash and avoid… You know..." Dean glanced in Meg's direction again, and they all nodded, acknowledging the fact that interrogating her might end up being bloody. Meg on her part just just glared at them all, but Cas could spot a hint of fear in her eyes. Feelings were a difficult thing to deal with, especially after being numb for a long time.

Stepping outside again, Cas looked at the Impala. His first instinct had been to go for the passenger door, he always rode shotgun, but somehow, that didn't feel like his place anymore. Dean brushed past him, yanking along a struggling Meg and headed straight for the trunk. She actually started fighting him even more once she realized where he intended to put her, but thankfully, Sam stepped in.

"We got too much stuff, put her in the back, she'll be secure between me and Bobby." Dean scoffed but nodded. Cas stepped towards the car, opened the back door and climbed in. He could see them all share a look, but Bobby nodded and Dean heaved a sigh before he shoved Meg in and stepped back for Bobby to climb after. Sam slid into the passenger seat and turned to look at Cas, giving him a sympathetic look that was surprisingly void of any pity.

Cas spent the entire ride just staring out the window.

He had no idea what he was doing any more. What was the point? The life he had, the life he had built with Dean, was completely ruined. Even though Dean was still there, it felt as though he was slowly slipping away and Cas knew he would be completely heartbroken when eventually this whole thing settled down and they had to face each other.

Becoming an angel again would help, he wouldn't have to feel it. That was another good point on the pros and cons chart. He just couldn't believe he was even considering this. But what else could he do?

Without his powers and his connection to the Host, they would most certainly lose. Fighting all of Hell and all of Heaven, at the same time? They needed every advantage they could get.

Not like Dean would care either way. Cas knew what his husband thought of him and even if there had been a part that had really loved him before, that part was completely obliterated once Cas revealed who he truly was. At least if he was an angel again, he could help them better, or find a way to put a stop to the whole end of the world thing.

Or die trying.

The abandoned building seemed to be an old orphanage and Cas noticed, purely by accident, the significant look Sam threw in Dean's direction. Inside, there were classrooms and dorms and one big canteen plus a few storage and utility rooms.

They set things up in the big boys' dorm; Cas took Bobby's books and weapons, Sam took the duffels while Dean dragged Meg to the cot furthest from the door and cuffed her to the radiator. It was really interesting to see how that old demon curing enchantment worked, especially since he hadn't really expected it to, they were just out of options and he had to try something. Still Cas knew she would need another dose soon. It wasn't so easy to heal a corrupted soul after all.

Cas turned to inform Sam of this when he caught a glimpse of something red on Dean's sleeve. As his husband walked by him, Cas instinctively grabbed his wrist and moved his arm around to get a better look. "What–"

"You're bleeding," Cas stated dumbly, and looked up at Dean. Realizing what he had done, he immediately let go of Dean's hand, fighting the urge to roll up his sleeve and have a better look. Dean just stared back at him, probably just as surprised as Cas was, but managed to snap out of it. He looked away, cleared his throat and touched his own hand where Cas' used to be just a second ago. "Yeah, I got a cut when we were thrown across the room. No big deal. I was just gonna clean it. Had, um… Had more important things to deal with before."

It had always been one of Dean's better qualities, how he always put everyone before himself, but he had been known to take it to extremes before. Cas wouldn't be surprised if Dean was in pain, but didn't tell anyone because he didn't want to be a burden. He had been the same with Cas too, at first, but Cas quickly picked up on what his husband was doing and he subtly tried to help him boost his idea of self worth.

Seeing Dean reveal the cut to Sam and asking his brother to stitch it up for him made Cas realize all his hard work might have been for nothing.

How far would Dean go to help the people around him? What would he do to save Sam or Bobby? Or the whole world?

Cas suddenly realized Dean had a very big weakness, one that the angels could exploit easily. He had to find a way to stop it.

"Hey, um, Cas?" Sam called out to him after he finished with Dean. His husband stepped to the side, pretending to go through their bags, not at all listening in on the conversation.

"Yes, Sam?"

"The thing you did to Meg - cured her, you said it's not, um, permanent?" Sam was obviously curious, but Cas knew they also needed this information, to know how best to approach her.

"It's not. It took centuries of torment to twist her soul into what it is today and it would take a little more than a few drops of blood to completely turn it to its original glory. But it is possible. It would acquire time and a significant amount of purified or blessed blood. Though I do believe that my blood had a bigger effect, possibly due to the fact that I used to be an angel." Cas heard Dean make a noise at that, but he couldn't decipher what it meant, especially since his face was an expressionless mask.

"Right. How long do you think the effect will last?"

"Hard to tell, especially if she hides any signs that her powers are returning." As they all expected her to do. "Perhaps now would be a good time for another dose and after the effects take place, you could try to question her. She might be more vulnerable and more susceptible to psychological games." Something inside of Cas ached as he spoke those words. He had always valued human life and considering they were about to begin the process of turning her into one, a part of Cas didn't really want to see her hurt. He knew she would be scared and hurting, coming to terms with all the things she had done as a demon.

After they had everything settled, Dean and Sam went out to get the supplies they would need and some food too. Bobby decided to look over his books again, probably hoping to find anything that might help their situation. With Meg tied down and nowhere to go, Cas decided to take one of the free cots and lie down for a while. He hadn't had much sleep last night and the fight with a hoard of demons drained him.

His thoughts kept circling back to his decision. Of him becoming an angel again. The more he thought about it, the more sense it made that he should do it. He was just so tired. Tired of feeling like crap, tired of trying to deal with it all, with Dean and his anger. He just… He couldn't deal with it anymore.

It was a little over an hour later that Sam and Dean returned with food, four big, greasy burgers, fries and of course pie. Cas still hadn't perfected his recipe, but Dean had enjoyed his pies regardless. And Cas had liked them too, he could see the appeal, with the crispy crust and the juicy filling, they really were the best desert out there.

Cas had a few bites of his burger, but it just didn't sit right with him, despite being hungry. He picked a few fries and those were marginally better, but there was still this heavy feeling in the pit of his stomach. His eyes moved from the wall he was distantly staring at to the woman sitting miserably on the cot with her hand over the radiator to which it was cuffed to.

Reaching a decision, he took a few more bites of his burger, enough to satisfy his hunger, then picked it up and carried it over to Meg's cot. He sat down, ignoring her involuntary flinch and offered her the food. "Here."

When Meg made no attempt to take the burger, not even looking up at Cas, he let out a long sigh. "I know what it's like. To be overrun with it all, to become human. I know you're feeling overwhelmed now and next to it all, you're probably hungry too. This should help, go on."

He could almost feel her heartbeat rise as her breaths picked up speed, she was barreling head first into a panic attack. Maybe he should try something a little easier? Without making any sudden movements, he reached up to where Dean left a few water bottles and picked one up, then twisted the cap and silently offered it to Meg. This time, she took it without a fuss, gulping down half of it before she clenched the bottle in her hands as if someone might take it from her. She was still breathing heavily, but seemed a little calmer now.

"I'll just leave this with you," Cas said, lowering the burger to the little nightstand, then got up and walked away from her, heading back to the table where they had been eating. Bobby was already done with his food, going back to his books. Sam had observed the whole exchange curiously, and he nodded at Cas when the angel returned. Dean didn't spare him a glance, but he did seem a little upset. Angry even? Not that Cas really cared anymore.

He finished up his fries and drank his water and after making sure Bobby didn't need any help with anything, he excused himself, going out for some fresh air.

"Don't wander off!" Dean yelled after him and Cas frowned then nodded dumbly. Where would he go, anyway?

The place was isolated and it had a wide yard that must have been very nice once, but was now overgrown with grass and roots. Cas had enough time to take in a few deep breaths and glance around the property, feeling that heaviness in the air when it started to rain. It was just a few drops here and there at first, but with each passing second it got worse until it was absolutely pouring. Thankfully, Cas hadn't taken a single step away from the threshold of the back door, so he didn't need to worry about getting wet.

It was very soothing, almost to the transcendent level, but Cas knew it couldn't last forever. Better stop watching it while it still felt good.

"Why the fuck should I tell you assholes anything?" was the first thing Cas heard when he came back into the dorm room. Meg was still sitting on the bed, Bobby by her side looking down at her, while Sam pulled up a chair so that he would be opposite her. Dean was at the table, jaw clenched as he played with the Kurdsh blade, obviously agitated.

"You don't really have a choice here, Meg. We already know what's going on and why Hell is after us. Anything you give us would just be a plus, but it would show your willingness to help and it might make us consider leaving you alive. Or we could just kill you now and be done with it." Sam was very persuasive. Meg was obviously terrified, but still she kept spewing profanities at the hunter. Sam was smart though, he hadn't tried hitting her or yelling at her, he was cool and collected and she knew to fear that type the most.

In the end, all he had to do was wait her out.

The longer they were staring at one another, the more her breathing quickened and ultimately it was Dean moving, his chair scraping across the floor that broke the spell, making Meg flinch violently and breaking down. Sam rushed to her just as a violent sob wretched itself from her chest and she came close to sliding off the bed. He embraced her and pulled her back up on the bed, sitting next to her as she cried into his shoulder.

Across the room, Sam's eyes met Cas' and all it took was a small nod to spring cas into action. He got up and strode to the table where Dean was sitting, grabbing a syringe and plunging it into his arm. Ignoring the pinch and Dean's eyes tracking his movements, he took out a little over half an ounce of blood, then walked over to Sam and Meg. Sam tightened his hold over her, but thankfully she didn't realize what was happening until it was too late. The needle of the syringe went into the side of her neck and Cas quickly emptied it before she started thrashing.

Cas chanted, opening up the cut on his hand which he pressed against Meg's mouth as soon as it started to bleed, muffling her screams. White light illuminated her eyes, growing stronger, making them all squint and look a little to the side. Once it dimmed, Meg sagged in Sam's arms, her breathing evening out a little.

Sam still held her tightly, an odd expression on his face.

"Lemme take a look," Dean said, not really asking as he took Cas' hand in his to examine the small gash. Cas stumbled when Dean pulled him in the direction of the table and watched him with confusion as Dean took a gause, doused it in Peroxide and pressed it against the cut. Cas was just too surprised to react, to even hiss at the slight burn; all he could do was just stare at his husband as Dean wrapped his hand up in a bandage.

There was a hint of something in Dean's eyes when they rose to lock with his, but whatever it was, it was gone before Cas could even begin to comprehend what he was seeing.

"They want you both." Meg's weary voice broke the silence. "They want to open the cage and let Lucifer out."

"How? How do they plan to open his cage?" Cas asked, moving towards her. She looked up at him, her dark brown eyes shining with tears.

"The seals. They are going to try to break the seals." It was just as Cas suspected. But if Sam was Lucifer's true vessel, why would they need Dean? Cas mentally ran over everything he knew about that particular prophecy, but nothing came to mind. If they were breaking the seals, then it was only a matter of time before they got to the last one. The only reason they would need Dean was to stop Michael from taking him, but the apocalypse wouldn't commence until both brothers were in their true vessels.

Unless…

"Who broke the first seal?!" His tone was a little rougher, volume a bit higher, but he couldn't help it. Pieces were slowly starting to fall into place and Cas didn't like the picture they were forming.

"Nobody yet. But they have an idea about who might be the perfect man for the job." With that, Meg glanced in Dean's way. Cas looked back at his husband too, frowning as he slowly came to the realization of what exactly Meg was implying.

'And it is written that the first seal shall be broken when a righteous man sheds blood in hell. As he breaks, so shall it break.'

He still remembered Metatron's offhand comment about "the righteous man who begins it is the only one who can finish it." Dean was Micheal's vessel and Michael was supposed to be the victorious one. And considering how just, principled and honorable Dean was, it made perfect sense that it would fall upon him to be said righteous man.

Even though Cas knew deep down that Dean would never spill innocent blood. There had to be more to that part, maybe a loophole? Maybe all Dean needed to do was to spill his own blood while in Hell for the first seal to be broken?

Either way, Cas wasn't going to let that happen. Any of it.

Castiel felt a little detached after as he explained it all to the Winchesters. Bobby showed them some texts he had been reading in the books he and Dean fetched, texts that spoke of the seals. They grew quiet for a while once Castiel told them about the fact that there were over a thousand of seals, but that the demons needed to break only 66 to open the cage.

"You said that the first demon has to be the one to break the last seal. That'll be Lilith, right?" Bobby asked, not looking up from his Dictionnaire infernal. When Cas confirmed, Bobby scanned over the text before he spoke up again. "But it says here that she is the final seal. 'And it is written, that the first demon shall be the last Seal.' It speaks about a blood sacrifice and about the possible location of something called 'the mouth of the cage'."

"Let me see that." Cas stepped closer, taking the book Bobby was glad to hand over. As he scanned the text, Cas got more and more surprised by the details in it, and how accurate some of those details were, at least the ones he knew about. Not to mention how similar the words were to those written down by Metatron. Glancing at the name of the author, Cas found the book to be written by Jacques Collin de Plancy and while the name didn't ring a bell, Cas had to assume that the author somehow had inside information. The only other thing that drew Cas' attention was the Aquarian star on the first page of the book. The unicursal hexagram was a symbol for a very specific group of men and women, knowledge seekers. Still, Cas dismissed this as something irrelevant as said organization didn't exist any more. Instead, he chose to focus on something much more important.

"You are correct. And from what I am seeing, this is a trustworthy source. It speaks of the exact ritual needed for the final seal to be broken. So if we were to prevent this, all we would need to do is make sure they don't have all the ingredients to the ritual." It wouldn't be easy, not by a long shot, but if they could do this, if they could pull this off, it would not only put a wrench into the whole apocalypse, but could possibly prevent any future attempts of starting one.

"We have to get rid of the last seal before the first one even has a chance to be broken. We have to kill Lilith."

As Cas lay in what was now his cot later that night, trying and failing to fall asleep, he couldn't help but remember the look on Dean's face through the entire conversation. He had seemed so resigned, too quiet and it had just felt so wrong. They hadn't agreed to anything yet, but they had a general direction they knew they were headed and Cas was more than prepared to fight.

To save humanity? He was prepared to fight. To save his husband? He was determined to win.

"Brother. I know you can hear me. I know I made you a promise, but I never considered things would get this complicated. I need your help. I need you to bring back what's mine," he quietly whispered the prayer, purposely being vague about it, but knew that Gabriel would understand. He would feel Cas' desperation. He would know. The only question was - would he come?

When they woke up in the morning, Meg was gone, leaving behind a bloodied cuff still locked to the radiator.