Daryl rushes home, utterly confused.
He doesn't understand the way, he reacts to Carol. He knows, she's not the one to blame for all the crap going on. And yet he behaves as if it was her fault.
Her husband (hopefully soon to be ex-husband!) is the one to blame.
Maybe Beth.
Two grown up, making decisions without caring for consequences.
He was hurt when Beth left, he was truly devasted. But he came to realize, that he never really loved Beth. He loved the idea of being in love. It is this one thing, he ever dreamt of. A loving wife. Maybe kids. A family. And when Beth came into his life, the walls, he created around himself all his life, started to crumble. Growing up as a Dixon meant loneliness. His mother died when he was a little kid, his dad was a mean man, cruel and hard against his sons. And Merle, well Merle was Merle. Sometimes charming, sometimes an asshole. Never there, when Daryl needed him. And there she was, beautiful Beth Greene. And she was interested in him. He couldn't believe his luck. He was so desperate for closeness, for affection, for a touch. He was willing, to let her in. But she wasn't the right one. He knows that now. That's the reason, he flinched at her touches. His dreams had not been hers. And that's okay for him. Now. It took him some time, to realize that the break-up now is much less hurtful than a break-up years from now.
And that is the reason, why he can't understand his feelings about Carol.
He's not angry at her. Not mad. He doesn't want to hurt her.
On the contrary.
He wants to put a smile on her lips.
He wants her eyes to light up.
He wants to hear her laughter.
He wants to touch her...and he wants nothing more than to be touched by her.
He dreams of her. Almost every night. He dreams of naked skin, soft and smooth as silk. Of those beautiful lips, swollen from kisses and wrapped around his rigid flesh. He dreams of words of love, whispered against his sweaty skin.
He wakes up...alone.
Feeling uncomfortable with a raging hard on.
These feelings scare him.
So he keeps his distance to her.
He silently admires how she manages her life here. How easily she makes friends. How she fits into the Greene family. He admires the way, she holds her head up high even when life beats her down.
He wants to wrap his arms around her and hold her close.
And that scares the shit out of him.
He's afraid, this stunning woman will move away from here as soon as she is back on her feet.
Why should a woman like her stay here?
Why should she stay with a man like him?
A worthless piece of shit, ugly with the scars that litter his body. Broken. Pathetic. And with no clue, how to please a woman.
With a big sigh, he pours himself a drink and settles on his couch.
Oh man, why is life so complicated!?
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Daryl keeps his distance.
To Carol and the Greenes, to the fellow human beings.
He busies himself with work. On weekends, he goes hunting.
No church walks or family dinners for him any more.
His life becomes normal again. Well, normal for him, at least.
Lonely.
One day he drives past the diner. He watches Carol at work. In her pink uniform, she serves burgers and coffee. Sophia sits at a table, drawing. Carol laughs with customers and Daryl feels lonelier than ever.
She sends him the money she owes him. There's a note enclosed. 'Thanks for everything. Sorry for everything.' It makes him sad somehow.
Like this is the end.
Life is confusing.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
But Carol doesn't move on. She finds peace in this small village. The people here are friendly, helpful, polite.
Of course there are whisperings and rumors about Beth and Ed. About Daryl. About her.
But Carol doesn't care. She knows the truth about everything that happened. And that's enough.
She feels contend here, maybe even happy. And Sophia loves it here. She smiles and laughs and giggles, she behaves like the kid she is. And that is wonderful for Carol. Her little girl is still shy around adults, but she found a good friend in Carl Grimes. They are class mates and they like to spend their afternoons together, too. Carl and Rick teach her to ride a bicycle, something, Ed never would have allowed. It is great for Sophia to see how a real father behaves.
Carol also found friends. Foremost the Greenes. Hershel is like a well-meaning uncle and Carol enjoys working for him. And Maggie and Glenn are absolute sweethearts. She also takes up with Lori and Rick Grimes, Carl's parents. Lori, as a real estate agent, helped her to find a small apartment, big enough for her and Sophia and cheap enough, that she can affort it.
She still feels bad for Daryl. She's glad, that her shitty husband is gone. But Daryl's world was shattered when his fiancee left. Left with her husband. No wonder, Daryl is still angry at her. She remembers the cold look in his eyes at Hershel's place. It has hurt her.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Daryl is perplexed when he learns that Carol and Sophia rent a small apartment in town. They don't move away. They are still here.
He feels confused.
He warms up a TV dinner after a long day in the garage and a short shower at home, when he hears a knock at his front door. It is unusual for him to get a visit. He opens the door slowly and finds himself face to face with Carol.
He's shocked at her appearance, her eyes are red and puffy, her diners uniform is wrinkled and dirty, as if she has slept in it. There are dark rings under her eyes, she's trembling.
"Carol."
She wrenches her hands. He can sense her anxiety.
"You still have contact with her?" she asks with a uncertainty.
"What?"
"I need to contact him", she says and braces herself against a blow.
He shakes his head no and her face begins to crumble. Tears are welling up in her soulful eyes and he does the only thing he can think of. He takes her in his arms.
She cries against his broad chest and he gently strokes her back.
For the first time in his life he initiates a hug and he never wants to let go.
"What happend? Why do you want to talk to him?"
"It's Sophia. She had an accident. A car crashed into her bicycle. She has a minor traumatic brain injury and a ruptured spleen. She had an emergency surgery, for now she's stable. Maggie is with her at the moment. And after all, he's her dad", Carol sobs.
He tightens the grip of his arms around her.
"I'm sorry, I have no phone number or address. I don't no how to contact them. But I will come with you back to the hospital. You're not in the condition to drive alone."
Now, that he has her in her in arms-and it feels so natural-he never wants to be alone again.