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"Gambling, huh?" Mr. Skywalker says, cocking an eyebrow.
Rey flushes. But he doesn't bring it up again, gesturing for her to work and telling her, as per usual, just what she's doing wrong. Rey's heart hangs heavy in her chest. She'd rather Mr. Skywalker confront her, as opposed to ignoring it.
She's always ignored. She's a shadow slipping through the hallways of Jakku, a ghost working on auto parts, a thief, a survivor with no one to care if she survives except her parents, and they haven't found her.
Are they even looking? That's her worst fear.
Rey rubs her temples, trying to program. Leia and Han grounded her and Finn for a week, but Leia assured her they don't plan to get rid of her. Rey doesn't understand.
Mr. Skywalker leaves the room. For what purpose, Rey doesn't even know. Nor does she know when or if he'll be back. She sighs.
A knock sounds against the door frame. Rey turns around in her chair.
Kylo stands there. He gives her an awkward wave.
She snorts, tipping her chair back. "What's up?"
"Project's not going well," he responds. "What else is new?"
"Welcome to the club," Rey says. She gestures at her figures. "Hey, you wanna look at it? You might have a better idea than me."
He strolls towards her and hops onto the desk behind her. He squints at the screen. "Um. No. I'd need more time to look at it. Right now it's—a confusing mess. I mean, I'm confused. Not that it's necessarily bad."
Rey laughs, looking up at him. "No, it is bad. Your uncle's annoyed."
"Hence why he's not here, I presume," muses Kylo, tilting his head back and looking around the classroom. Late afternoon sunlight filters through the windows, sopping the desks. Flowers and plants line the windowsills, though one of them wilts, leaves turning brown. Mr. Skywalker's desk is cluttered, papers strewn across it and empty coffee cups lined up in a row.
Rey sighs. "He hates me."
"Not as much as he hated me." Kylo swallows. "Sorry."
Rey hesitates, and then reaches out, placing her hand on his knee. Kylo looks at her, eyes wide. He sucks in his breath. "I'm sorry," she says.
He shakes his head. "Not your doing."
Silence settles over them. Rey doesn't know whether to move her hand or leave it there like a dead fish, or knead his knee. "Why do you go by Kylo?" she asks.
He smirks. "Snoke suggested it when I was complaining about everyone always having expectations of Ben Solo. But he didn't want me to use it before I graduated, but I'm using it now. He's okay with it. I think he's proud." Kylo shrugs.
"Can he be proud?" Rey asks.
"Huh?" Kylo glances down at her.
"He doesn't seem the warm type," Rey says, face red and hot. The clock ticks in the background.
Kylo swallows. "He's not—but I mean. I don't need that."
Rey frowns.
"I didn't mean to criticize you," he interjects. "Some people need it more—that's not wrong, or weak."
But you do need it, don't you? Rey cranes her neck, looking back up at him. You're so lonely. So am I. We'd both die for approval.
You shouldn't have to earn it.
Neither should I. Tears prick her eyes.
Something rough, but warm, closes over her hand. Rey glances down. Kylo's taken her hand, caressing it. His face reddens. "Sorry—is this okay?"
Rey nods. His touch is gentle, comforting.
"You looked so pretty with your hair down," he says. "I mean, you look pretty with it up in that hairstyle too."
Rey laughs. "You're a dork." A dork who—likes me?
He flinches. And then he laughs, a rumbling sound. Rey likes it. She gets to her feet.
Kylo goes silent, staring up at her. Even with him sitting on the desks and her standing, she's barely taller than he is. She doesn't know what she's doing. Her wrists tingle. He leans in, eyes fixed on her. She can feel his breath. Are you going to kiss me? Am I going to kiss you?
His free hand cups the back of her neck. His eyes search hers. She nods, parting her lips.
He leans down, lips pressing into hers. Rey opens her mouth, trying to follow his lead, but it only takes a second to realize he has no idea what he's doing either. Rey giggles. He chuckles and pulls back.
This time Rey leans in, pulling his head up. His arm wraps around her waist. She closes her eyes even as butterflies erupt in her abdomen. He's kissing me. He likes me.
The door bangs open behind them. Rey jumps. Kylo jerks back.
Mr. Skywalker gapes at them, shaking his head. Rey gulps.
Logically she knows they're not the only kids who've been caught making out before. But it's her first kiss. And she did not want this to happen.
"I can see you're working hard," Mr. Skywalker says coldly.
Rey wants to melt from embarrassment. Kylo scowls. "I'll go now."
Rey opens her mouth to call after him, but he's already racing past his uncle. And then anger flares. Rey glares at him. "Is it true?"
Once the words are out of her mouth, there's no pulling them back. Rey's chest heaves.
"Is what true?" Mr. Skywalker demands.
"That you were building weapons," Rey says. "Is it? Is it true? And you let everyone think Kylo's a liar for no—"
"Is that what he told you?" Mr. Skywalker snorts.
"Yes!" Rey shouts. "That's what he told me, and I—you—I've seen nothing of you to suggest that you think the human race is worth saving at all. Or that you believe in goodness or hope. You're a cynical old man who let his nephew take the fall for something that was his own fault!" She clenches her fists.
Mr. Skywalker's face drains.
"Tell me whether or not it's true!" Rey screeches. Her throat tightens. She doesn't know why this is upsetting her so much. I thought—I thought—you might be—you gave me hope—you're just an old washed-up cynic.
I thought you were so much more. Sob wrack her throat.
"It's half true," Luke says. "I had already decided not to go through with them and was going to throw them out."
"Oh, that's rich," Rey shoots back. "Why should I believe the man who lied—you don't have to speak to lie, you know.'
I'll come back for you, I promise!
That was a spoken lie.
She slams her laptop shut and pushes her way past him.
Finn hears the sobbing coming from the bathroom when he gets home. Snoke's keeping Kylo late, apparently. He pauses, wavering on the wooden floorboards, uncertain whether to knock or hide.
The door swings open. Finn jumps. Rey stands there, eyes red and nose swollen. She ducks her head when she sees him there. Great, now she probably thinks him creepy. "Uh," he says, gulping. "You okay?"
She shrugs, and then shakes her head, covering her mouth to muffle another sob. Finn wraps his arms around her. She hugs him back.
He leads Rey into his room. "What happened? Is it that shthead?" If Hux told anyone about Rey's arrest, then Finn swears he'll—
"No," says Rey. "Well. Which—which shithead?"
"Hux." Finn's ready to dial Rose and Poe and take them down.
Rey shakes her head. "Mr—Skywalker and I—aren't—I mean, he got in a fight—I don't think he's a good person—"
Finn blinks. "What happened?"
Rey shakes her head. "I don't want to talk about it."
"Okay." Finn leans back.
"This is not my week," Rey says, dropping onto Finn's bed and resting her head on her knees.
Finn doesn't know what to say. "Can you talk to him tomorrow?"
Rey shakes her head. "I think he's—he's awful. I mean, he's a liar, and a fraud, and a—he wasn't helping me anyways. I really should just pack my things and go back to Jakku."
"Why would you want to go back there?" Finn asks, incredulous.
Rey lifts her head, playing with the threads on her ripped jeans. The light fades behind her. "My parents might be looking for me there. Unkar Plutt didn't take my call yesterday."
Rey. Finn doesn't know what to say. "I want you to stay."
Rey's neck snaps up. She meets his eyes, hers watering. He offers her a sheepish smile. "You're—the first person I've ever met who hasn't looked at me like just some useless foster kid—you—"
"Thank you," she manages. Rey rubs her temples and groans. "I don't know what to do."
"If I can help—"
She shakes her head, but she smiles. "Thanks." Her brow creases. "But why did you think Hux was the one who did something to me?"
Finn swallows. Oh. He's not sure how Rey will react. But he doesn't want to lie to Rey. "Well—Rose and I—we overheard him saying some things about you and Poe, when we were at the casino, before they sicced security on you. Hux said he looked up your past, and he called the mechanic shop you worked at a criminal—"
Rey leaps to her feet. "That record's sealed! I wasn't—I was a kid, I didn't have a choice, they dropped the charges!"
Finn throws his hands up in the air. "I believe you, Rey! It doesn't matter to me. I don't care at all—he's a piece of—"
"How did he even find out?" Rey cries out.
"No idea." Finn gulps. "I'm sure he's looked up information on me." But there really isn't much to be found.
"I hate him," Rey mumbles. "Snake."
"Whatever they say doesn't matter," Finn says. "We all know you're a good person, Rey. I know." He rolls his eyes. "Hell, I know what it's like to be a foster kid too."
Rey swallows. She nods. "Thank you." Her voice is a whisper.
"You can go home," Snoke finally says.
Kylo shifts in his seat. He knows he's been slacking off all afternoon, and the fact that Snoke's words hit him like a splash of cold water on a broiling hot day. He wants to go home and talk to Rey. And kiss her again.
For once, home doesn't seem like a prison. Stars glitter outside the window. Mom said she was making spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. Kylo's stomach growls.
Kylo stuffs his laptop and notebook into his black backpack. Hux lets out a sigh and waves. "Goodbye, Mr. Snoke."
"Good night."
Kylo looks up to find Snoke's eyes boring into him. "What?"
"You—"
A gasp from Hux cuts them off. "Good grief!" Hux shouts. "What are you doing here?"
Kylo whirls around to find Rey standing there, chest heaving. For a moment he thinks she came for him, but her eyes spark with fury, and her fists are clenched and shaking. "Rey!"
"You," Rey says, stepping towards Hux. He takes a step back and stumbles into a desk, clutching the chair to right himself. "You absolute ass."
"I don't believe you're supposed to be here," Snoke says, rising behind his desk. Kylo drops his bag and rushes over to her.
"I heard that you and Phasma somehow illegally got access to my records," Rey shouts. "How? I want to know how! I'm trying to—I don't want—"
Hux straightens. His lips curve into a smile. "Which records? The arrest ones? Or the court ones where they note that your parents were alcoholics who abandoned you because they'd rather spend money on alcohol?"
"That's a lie!" Rey yells.
Kylo doubts it's a lie. He's seen the world. It's cruel. But Rey—her eyes are bloodshot and shining, and she takes another threatening step towards Hux.
"Cute mugshot," Hux sneers. He reaches into his bag. "Hey, I have a copy—"
"I'm filing a complaint," Rey informs him. "It's illegal, what you did, and I'm not going to just roll over and take it—"
"What, from me?" Hux asks, blinking. "I don't want you to take anything from me. Bet you take it from Ren though—"
Kylo's jaw drops. He steps towards Hux as Rey's fist flies out first, clocking Hux in the jaw.
"Stop!" orders Snoke. "Both of you, and don't you even think of getting involved, Kylo Ren." He marches over. Hux whimpers. "Go home, Armitage. I'll take care of this."
"You aren't going to report him for hacking?" Rey yelps. "Because that's the only way he could have found out—being that vindictive when he doesn't even know me is—" Tears spill down her cheeks.
Hux scampers out of the room. Coward, Kylo thinks. Did he really look up all that shit on Rey? Just to humiliate her? Why?:
"I might report you for assault, though," Snoke says. "And no, Rey, Hux did not hack into any database. I did."
Huh? Kylo gapes at his mentor. Rey freezes.
"I knew there was something off about you," Snoke continues, stepping towards them.
Speak. Speak, Goddammit. Kylo's tongue feels like it's glue sitting in his mouth. He can't breathe. His chest feels as if it's filled with sludge.
"So I did a little sleuthing," Snoke continues. "You—"
You did this because you don't want her to win the contest. And you think she will. Kylo's wrists ache from squeezing his fists so tightly. His knuckles pop. I think she will, too. The figures she showed him earlier today were so advanced, despite her complaining about being stuck. And I want her to.
"I have all the proof on my laptop," Snoke continues. Tears fall down Rey's face as she gapes at him. Another adult betraying her. A teacher who should protect her. Just like his uncle. Just like Luke Skywalker. "Hux won't say a word until I ask him to. And—"
"That's blackmail," Rey ekes out. "I was a kid; I had no choice, it was that or wind up on the streets—"
"It didn't matter to the cops who arrested you, do it's not going to matter here," Snoke says. "If it gets out, no one will vote for your project."
You're a completely insane bastard.
Who helped me.
But you're a bastard.
Why why why why why why why?
A sob escapes from Rey's mouth. "You're a—piece of shit." She's still glaring at him. Defiant. Unlike Kylo, who always caved. Always.
I just wanted you to pat me on the head.
You never will. If this is your way of getting me to succeed—it's not—you don't have any faith in my abilities. You never did. I'm just a pawn.
Kylo backs up. Rey's eyes catch him. She's pleading.
He turns his back to her and marches towards Snoke's desk.
"Yes," Snoke says. "And you're a thief whose own parents didn't want her."
"Mine don't want me either," Kylo finally chokes out, standing in front of Snoke's desk. He looks over his shoulder to find Snoke glowering at him. The desk is so orderly it puts Threepio's to shame. But there's opulence too, from fifty dollar pens in velvet cases to the latest laptop design, to bright crimson frames around his awards. There are no photographs of any family members or friends. Kylo doubts he has them. You've been taking advantage of me. If I lose to Hux, I'll just become like she is to you. Expendable.
And she isn't expendable to me. She listens. She reaches out. She understands. She, she, she. Rey.
Snoke snorts. "But I want you."
Rey's lips curl. "You're disgusting."
"Yeah," Kylo chokes out. "You are." He grabs Snoke's expensive laptop. He arches his arm back and throes it against the wall,.
The screen shatters, shards of spraying. He stomps on it, sending keyboard keys scattering everywhere, stomps on the battery part.
Snoke lets out a howl. He rushes at Kylo. "Stop!"
"Good luck trying to get proof on her now," Kylo snarls. "Now it's just a rumor, you ugly old fuck."
"Ben," manages Rey. "Ben, you—"
I'm in huge trouble. Kylo whirls on his heel, snatching his backpack and grabbing Rey's hand. He pulls her out into the hallway. Rey gasps. "Come on!"
They run down the deserted school hallways, past the bright red lockers and through the doors. Kylo throws his bag into his car. Rey leaps inside, and he turns the keys in the ignition, tries squealing as they drive out.
"What the hell?" Rey manages.
Kylo tries to concentrate on the road. The moon, full, glows above. "I—it's over." He swears, and then pulls the car over to the side of the road. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah? I can take care of myself," Rey says. "I wasn't going to let that ginger rat ruin—"
"I don't even care," Kylo says. "I don't care about Snoke. I don't—he's always been using me—I'm sorry, Rey. I'm sorry."
"I'm not mad at you."
He moans, leaning his head against the steering wheel. "I'm going to be in so much deep shit." He snickers.
"I—"
"No," Kylo cuts her off. "I'm taking the blame, Rey."
"I mean, I came in to confront him and I doubt he'll keep quiet about that, so—"
"You didn't smash the laptop." Kylo leans back, clutching his skull.
"Thank you," Rey says quietly. "No one's—ever stood up for me before. Besides Finn."
Kylo looks at her. Tears glint in her eyes. Fucking hell. And he yelled at his parents for wanting to take her in—we're so lost, you and I. But he found her.
She reaches out and draws his lips towards her again. She gets to her knees, kneeling on the seat, her arms around him as he pants, her mouth on his, his hands out in the cold, then clenched because his fingers feel numb and he doesn't know what to do with them. She tastes like soda. He uncurls his fists, placing his hands on her waist. One hand slides up her back, digging into her hair.
He doesn't feel lost.
A fist slams against the car window. Kylo jumps. Rey gasps.
He spins around to see, of all people, his uncle glaring at them.