Taelia's pov

You don't need to hold your breath for me. I die in the end. I was doomed to die from the beginning. I was doomed to die in exactly this way from the first goddamn time I accidentally hacked that server. I think that's what pisses me off the most. All of this misfortune, not just for myself but for the world, because of a fucking mistake...because of absolute chance. That's what people call destiny, isn't it? I blame myself for all of this, even though I also know it isn't my fault.

I never did anything bad...Ok, that's a lie. The bad things I did were out of survival, though I guess you could say that about anyone. I panicked and survived and because of that I ended up killing and selling myself and stealing and breaking pretty much every one of the morals I had as a kid. But maybe that's just an excuse and I'm trying to justify myself. I just want some comfort, you know?

I did everything I could to make sure the agents of Project Carthage couldn't use our research to do anything bad. I didn't make Xana bad. I didn't make Morgan. I didn't turn on the Supercomputer after finding out there was a being in there that wanted to kill everyone. I didn't directly do anything that lead up to the events happening now. Still...take me out of the equation and none of it would have happened. Therefore it's my fault, isn't it?

So, I figure it's time to take myself out of the equation. It's something I've wanted to do for a very long time. Do you know how much it sucks living in this body? My body is 13...right at the cusp of puberty...where it's been since 1994. It's 2005. Can you imagine 11 fucking years of being right on the edge of puberty? No wonder my emotions are such a wreck all the time. My mind has been going for 44 goddamn years, give or take...Oh god, has it really been that long? I'm way past my expiration date...

And somehow I keep going...no matter what the world throws at me, my body keeps going. I'm not invulnerable, just incredibly sturdy. I've tried to take myself out before, too. It doesn't work. I gave up on that too. So I'm getting Morgan to do it. I have absolute faith in her. If anyone can kill me, it's her. Of course I'm not gonna act like I want her to kill me. I'm gonna act like I want to kill her, and I do! Make no mistake about that...I'll try to kill her if I can, but I sort of doubt I can. Mostly because the weapon with the best chance of killing her is now in Ulrich's possession. My EMP gun was in the backpack I tossed Ulrich...also an apology letter and some supplies.

I'm going to try to leave, and Morgan will try to stop me. I will challenge her to a fight. If I were her I wouldn't be able to resist a rematch. I wouldn't stop until I proved myself. She seems similar to me, don't you think? Ok, not really all that similar, but she reminds me of me. If I had her past and she had mine...would anyone be able to tell the difference? Not that I know her that well. I just met her, after all. Still it's just...something...I can't put my finger on it. I'll challenge her and fight until I die. And maybe...just maybe...I'll be able to take her out with me. But like I said, don't hold your breathe. Morgan will kill me. That is a guarantee.

You're probably wondering why I'm telling you all this. It certainly isn't...standard story protocol for a character to just outright talk to you. Then again I guess you couldn't exactly call our story standard, huh? Well I guess I'm just...lonely, ya know? It's hard for me to express how I'm feeling, and not a lot of people understand what I've gone through. But you've seen it. You more or less know the whole story and you've seen how I feel. If you wanna know why I'm doing it, it's cause I'm tired and I want to die. You know that. I thought that the first fucking time I came into contact with Morgan, and I'm sure you were listening. But that isn't all of it. I want to save Aelita. While Morgan and I fight to the death, Aelita and her friends will be making their way to a shelter. They'll be safe there for a time. If I don't take out Morgan I have no doubt in my mind they will. They'll get through all this. I want Aelita to get through this. I want her to find her mother...assuming she's still alive...and leave this nightmare behind. She did absolutely nothing wrong. If anyone doesn't deserve this, it's her. She's had nightmares constantly. I just want things to be alright for her. I am her god-mother, after all.

Well, I think I've taken up enough space talking to you. It feels nice to let this out to someone who I think understands, even if I can't see or hear you. Consider this my confessional, I guess. I just wanted to be open and honest with someone before...you know. Now we can go back to the story. It's a lot more lighthearted than it probably should be considering what's going to happen. I feel a little better now, so thanks. You'll never meet me, and I'll never meet you. You can't stop me. Morgan is going to kill me. That is the way it has to be.

I woke up from my nap super groggy. Aelita was in the room, quietly packing some things in her backpack. She was trying not to wake me up. That was really nice of her. I grabbed the frame of the cot and stretched back. My neck and back were stiff. I yawned.

"Morning, Aelita. How are things going?" I asked.

"It's 5pm, actually. You've been asleep all day." She replied. She didn't look up at me. She just kept packing things.

"Oh!" I jumped up. I had never overslept like that! In fact...it had been longer than I could remember since I'd gotten that much sleep. The last time was probably when I first crashed at Feather's place. Oh...I felt bad. She was never gonna see me again. She would understand, though. Anyways...I scratched my head vigorously to wake myself up. I yawned and stretched. I looked over to see what Aelita was packing: some clothes and food. The shirts were pink and blue.

"Uh...Aelita, do you have any gray or black hoodies and jeans?" I asked.

"No." Aelita answered. I nodded slowly.

"In that case you'll need to borrow mine. We're about the same size." I went for the pile of my clothing.

"Why? It's summer." Aelita sounded confused. I tossled my hair in response.

"It's the hair. Your hair is really bright and incredibly distinct. I doubt you want to dye or shave it right now, so you have to hide it. Plus a hoodie is a good place to hide things and can keep you warm at night. As for some protection..." I rummaged in my pile and found what I was looking for. "Ta-da! A Swiss Army Knife. It's got all sorts of useful things for no matter where you are. It's a little used...cause I used it a lot. Here's the knife, that's probably most important for you." I showed her how to flip the knife out.

"Taelia, why are you doing this? We're going to be in a shelter for two days..." Aelita interrupted, giving me a look. I paused for a second, trying to find the words. I didn't really want to tell her I expected her to have to survive through much worse before things got better. I mean, maybe it was just paranoia but...I had a bad feeling things wouldn't be going very well for them. I wanted them to be as prepared as possible.

"I just want you to be prepared for anything, you know? I know you don't really consider me family, but I consider you family. Just let me do this for you." I reached out to her with the Swiss Army Knife. She reached out and took it. I clasped my hand over her's and looked her in the eye. She was soft and innocent and in pain. She didn't deserve this. She was still a kid. That's what I saw in her eyes. I don't know what she would see in mine. Probably nothing. I had nothing left inside. I'd had one foot in the grave for a long time. One of my most important tools of survival, I leave to Aelita.

I went to take a shower. I wanted to be clean. I wanted to feel the warm water running down my body. I wanted to relax a little bit...and have a little bit of time for myself. There was something so private and personal about a shower...but it wasn't isolating. It was just...incredibly nice. How many showers had I been able to take in the last however many years. Honestly, I didn't know. There was a lot about the past years that just sort of blurred together. I was more awake and aware now than I had been in some time.

I took off my towel and started the water running.

"Oh! Can I help you scrub your back?" I heard a high pitched voice. My eyes widened. I turned off the water and quickly wrapped the towel around me again just in time for Sissi to run around the corner followed by a very frazzled Odd. Sissi? Odd?

"Sissi, wait!" Odd grabbed ahold of her hand, then looked up at me. When he realized what was happening he blushed and straightened up. "Sorry, Taelia. She's, um...buggy." He smiled nervously. I took Sissi by the arm and inspected her.

"That's no surprise with the amount of time Jeremie had to make this work. Still, this a remarkable replication. If the worst thing that happens is that she's a little socially awkward, we're in good shape." The clone certainly seemed happy. She was nothing but smiles. Jeremie told me when he made clones they ended up having quirks. Jeremie's clone was a flirt, William's clone was stupid, and I guessed Sissi's clone was very sweet and helpful and didn't know the meaning of social boundaries?

"Oh my god, Taelia. Your skin is so clear and smooth! What products do you use, I simply must know!"

"I bathe in the blood of my enemies." I said, a complete deadpan. I was being sarcastic, though. Apparently Sissi clone didn't understand.

"I see." she said, and nodded intently.

"I'm kidding, Sissi. I don't use anything. I guess it's just like that." I smiled at her, then looked up at Odd. "You got put on babysitting duty?"

"Yep." Odd put his hand on his hip.

"Well. I wanted to take a shower so...Oh, you got the shelter for us, right?"

"Yeah, Stacey's picking us up at 8." Odd answered.

"Good...good...well, see ya then."

"See ya..." Odd said, as Sissi started to drag him away.

"Wait, one sec. Odd, you keep things light for everyone, ok? If times end up getting dark, you give them hope, ok?"

"Uh...yeah...I guess...That's what I'm here for, right?" Odd smiled awkwardly as he was dragged away by Sissi's clone. I turned the shower on, again.

I got out of the shower and got into a fresh shirt, gray hoodie, jeans, and sneakers. Now this was a running away outfit. I felt fresh and clean and ready. Aelita was out of the room by the time I got back to her room to get dressed. I was sleepy, but in a good way...peaceful.

"Taelia, could we talk to you for a minute?" I looked in the direction of the voice. There were two kids that looked to be a grade or two younger than me.

"Who are you?" I asked. They looked a little disappointed that I didn't know, but answered enthusiastically, anyways.

"Milly and Tamiya of the Kadic Herald. We were wondering if you had time for an interview?" She pointed to herself and her friend. Milly was the one actually doing the talking.

"An interview? For what?" I asked.

"Our article on you sudden disappearance and reappearance and your uncanny resemblance to Aelita. The people of Kadic want to know. This could be the scoop of the century!"

"Uh, I'd really rather not." I said, trying to walk away from them.

"Come on! Just answer a couple questions. This could make our journalistic career!" Tamiya pleaded. I was sorta stuck. I wasn't sure what to do. Would they let me leave f I tried? It wouldn't matter for too much longer whether I resembled Aelita or not. I wouldn't matter for too much longer.

"She said she doesn't want to. What kind of reporters harass someone for an interview?" William put his hand on my shoulder. "You'll be able to get an interview from me, later."

Milly and Tamiya gasped. Clearly William was someone they wanted to have an interview with. I didn't blame him, he seemed like an interesting guy around campus. He lead me away from them and into his room. He closed the door and turned to me. What exactly did he have in mind, here? I looked around. His room was filled with unfinished art...paintings...music compositions...there was a guitar on the wall.

"What's your plan, exactly?" William asked. He slumped over and flopped on the bed.

"Are you ok?" I asked, genuinely concerned.

"It's been two weeks, but I'm still tired...I had to put up mental resistance...and didn't sleep or eat much for months..."

"From Xana's control?" I asked. William shuddered.

"Yes. Now answer the question...You've been really vague. Why do you want us in a shelter? The others might be ok with it, but I won't follow your plan blindly." He was still hunched over, breathing steadily but heavily.

"I want you in a shelter so you will be safe." I looked around. Would Morgan be able to see or hear me from here...were there cameras? Whatever. This plan wasn't exactly based on trickery. "I plan on challenging Morgan to a battle. While we're fighting, you get away. The 48 hour period is the amount of time it'll take to make sure everything is clear if I kill her. If not, you have some time to prepare before she finds you or you have to face her again. Either way I'll be gone. Everyone's happy." I explained.

"You seem awful calm about this." William leaned back against the wall and looked up at me.

"And you seem awful shaken up since yesterday." I paused for a moment. "What did Morgan tell you?" William winced and took a breath in.

"She said 'I'm coming for you soon...my love.'"

Soon, it was time for dinner. We met up in the cafeteria. It was lamb chops for dinner. It tasted surprisingly good. This was it, the last time I would be in normal society with friends...Well...sort of friends. I had purposefully avoided Ulrich, Yumi, and Jeremie. They didn't run into me like the others did and I knew they really didn't want me around...especially Ulrich and Yumi. I didn't really have any unfinished business with them either, except to try to apologize again. They made it pretty clear they didn't care if I apologized.

We ate more or less in silence. There was really nothing more to talk about. I saw that Ulrich had my backpack with him. From his lack of a response I guessed he hadn't opened it...or if he had, he didn't care. I saw Aelita fiddling with something in her bag. I looked over to see what it was...No way...

It was Mister Puck.

"You...still have Mister Puck?" I asked. I remembered that Christmas so clearly. That was another one. That was another last moment of normality...of some form of happiness. Christmas, 1987...the night Anthea was kidnapped, and we ran away. The day Aelita got Mister Puck. The day we went into hiding. The day I stopped being Morgan Stones and started being Taelia Hopper.

"Yeah. Should I...not bring him?" Aelita asked.

"No!" I cut her off. "No. We all need something to remind us..." I reached into my pocket and took out a folded up photo. I unfolded it and showed it to Aelita. "This is mine." It was an old photo, from that same Christmas day. It was a family picture. A friend of the family had taken the photo. It was a picture of all of us celebrating in the cabin in the mountains, near the Project Carthage facilities in Canada. "Take it." I pressed it into her hand.

She took it and examined it, smiling s she saw her family. It was a sad smile, though. Both of her parents were gone, and she didn't really remember me...She pointed at me. I was taller in this picture, because I was older...19, if memory served. My hair was long and straight and black. I looked happy...

"You look like Morgan." Yumi pointed out.

I looked at the picture...I guess we did look similar...if you put in the red stripes...plus her name was Morgan, which was my original name, and the name Xana had known me by. Had Xana been trying to make...me?

"We should get going, huh?" Ulrich said. Odd looked at the time.

"Yeah, Stacey's gonna be here soon." Odd added.

We met up with her at the gates of Kadic. She seemed nice enough. She and Odd took the lead. They seemed pretty fond of each other. I..regretted never finding anyone. I couldn't let anyone into my life romantically. I couldn't drag anyone down with me...and they took me away so long ago. So very long ago...

"Are you ok?" Stacey asked. She was completely ignorant to what was happening, wasn't she? I managed a smile.

"I'm fine." I replied.

We walked through the city. Paris was beautiful. The night was cool, but not cold. There were the smells of pastries and...lights and life. The city was so beautiful...the life in it was so beautiful. This world was so...utterly cruel.

City gave way to forest. She was watching us and waiting...I knew she was. Everyone else probably knew she was too. It was quiet...and...it felt like there was static in the air. Morgan was creating a mood...a scene...she was showing off...she was toying with us. I looked around. We were in a forest clearing. This was as good a place as any.

"You guys go ahead. And move quickly. This is goodbye." I said.

And suddenly Aelita was hugging me. I froze. Then something inside me melted...I closed my eyes and there were tears pouring down my face. What? Why? Why was this happening? And I...I hugged her back and-

And I heard a slow, sarcastic clap.

"Well, well, well. Look what we have here. It's touching, really: sisterly love. You two should win an Oscar."

In one swift motion I let go of Aelita, wiped my eyes, and looked up. I didn't need to call her out for a challenge. She came to me.

"Get out of here right now, all of you!" I called to the Lyoko Warriors. My voice had such authority they did not question it, they just ran. My nostrils flared as I turned my attention solely on Morgan.

"Morgan Xanthos, I challenge you to a fight to the death."

Morgan scratched her chin, considering. Then she raised her hand in the air and shot a burst of red electricity into the air. It spread and descended into a dome that encompassed the clearing and some of the surrounding forest. This was our arena. She grinned, and there was something sadistic in her eyes.

"I accept."

Time elapsed since last chapter: 1 day

Time elapsed since chapter 1: 2 weeks and 1 day

I've been writing this all day. I had to get it out of me. I felt all that Taelia felt while writing this. I am exhausted...please leave a review and a like and follow...it would really mean a lot to me. The next chapter is gonna go so hard. I'm excited, you should be too.

And as always guys, have an awesome day!