"All rise." Mr Paris announces.

The conference room is painfully quiet as I enter to take my seat at the head of the table. Vorik and the visibly shaken Ensign are placed at the far end. It's a clear power play Starfleet had made hundreds of years ago. It's a semblance of a courtroom. It is clear that the guilty will have the least amount of power to wield. It is clear, that in this room, whatever strike down will be a heavy blow.

Even though the thought of a human being snuffing out an innocent, an innocent being who served under my command makes my stomach turn; I lack the desire to knock down or even punish. But justice is what I must serve today. Justice is what keeps our humanity in check and as the highest ranking human within the Delta Quadrant, I must adhere to that.

We settle in for a difficult meeting. I clear my throat. I glance to Chakotay and Ensign Kim who are seated at either side of me. Though I will be the deciding factor, the two will serve as council in the deliberation stage. I look around the room, the handful conducting the hearing, the few sitting as council and a smattering of the crew sitting in as witnesses. The room is full but still.

"Today, is not a trial. We have a confession, we have evidence and we have a decision to make….I have a decision to make." I take a moment before continuing, "The Federation has made it abundantly clear that life is something to be valued in all creatures, no matter where they come from or what they do. Life is sacred. It has been the pursuit and the protection of every species. It has caused us to evolve into what we are today. It is why this starship is built and why we fly it. We explore to know life, discover life and possibly create new life. The life within us, the proof of our existence, is ours to keep. Though we cannot control when it begins and especially when it ends, it is the only right that is guaranteed. It is the only right that has stayed true long before government, before cognitive understanding, before it all. It is that very right that is the reason we gather here today."

My words sink in. The severity of the subject causes the air to feel like lead and it shows in the solemn faces in the officers here with me. I glance over to Tuvok who is stoic, unmoving. I glance to Chakotay who looks down in deep thought. I glance to Mr Paris, whom usually the boisterous gentleman with a boyish grin, now looks back at me with a mask of worry far beyond his years. Much like Vorik, I am asking an extraordanary amount from a young man.

My eyes fall upon the guilty. She no longer quakes. She is quietly readying herself to face the inevitable.

"Ensign" I address her pointedly "The victim we will be discussing in your case, had that right. Through your actions, you have disregarded that right. Through your actions, that you have confessed to, you have disregarded one of the most basic right to humanity. I hope you realize the severity of what I have just said."

I can hear the muted groan reverberate throughout the room.

"….Though your actions go against the very core of The Federation and all that we stand for, we will continue to recognize your right as a living being throughout this process. I, along with the senior officers who will be deciding your sentencing, have agreed to adhere to that."

She looks back at me with a frozen stare. Though few would feel I would resort to a mandated execution, there is a risk due to our predicament. We do not have the luxury of a prison like we do back at home. We do not have the luxury of a carefully guarded facility, with a carefully built rehabilitation program, customized solely to slowly lead the young woman back to sanity and back to society. We cannot offer her a team of experts who would spend years offering her guidance and understanding.

We have nothing. So we would have been lying if that in a small ship, so far from home and hundreds of innocent lives, it would not be easiest to eradicate the problem to the point that not a single percentage of chance another innocent life could be snuffed out by her again. To commit the most necessary of evils is tantalizing. But I have made a vow to fight for my crew's sense of humanity until the moment we dock into Starfleet. Even in the face of such depravity I will not have us lose the essence of who we are.

I turn my gaze to the stoic young man sitting next to the frozen Ensign.

"Is the defendant aware of her charges?"

"Yes, Captain." he replies

"Does her confession still stand?"

"Yes, Captain."

"Then we will proceed. We will begin with the evidence and notes of investigation from Lieutenant Commander Tuvok. Commander you have the floor."

Tuvok nods and begins to drone. It's the basics, how the victim was found, the type of phaser that was used to kill her, where exactly in the heart the beam pierced through such a vital organ and finally that all tests ruled out any possibility that the phaser had been set on stun or changed within the milliseconds of the firing. I know this information. My mind fades slightly until I hear Tuvok say "With the Captain's permission, I would like to cross examine the defendant."

I turn to Vorik. He gives a curt nod signifying he's ready for the next phase. This isn't a meeting. It's a dance. It's a flurry of distraction before the big finish, my decision.

Vorik stands.

"Captain, due to my clients inability to speak, she will be writing her answers on a PADD and we will have an impartial representative read aloud. Will that be accepted?"

"Of course. Do you have a volunteer?"

"Master Chief Petty Officer Seven of Nine."

Seven approaches the table and stands next to the young Ensign. I sit up straighter.

The tempo changes. A tango begins.

"Where were you on the night of Ensign Little Iron's death?" Tuvok asks cooly

A pause for the Ensign to type.

"My quarters." Seven replies, almost mechanically.

"With Ensign Little Iron?"

A pause.

"Yes."

"Did you speak with the Ensign?"

"Yes."

"About what?"

"Work. Gossip. What will be served for dinner."

"Did the subject ever change before the murder took place?"

Pause. A breath.

"No."

"So you were in your quarters with the Ensign. You spoke of daily life and what would you say would be the moment you decided to pull out your phaser?"

"There wasn't a moment."

"Explain."

"It's hard to. But from what I remember, I felt myself just turn off. I watched myself just pull out my phaser and I just shot her."

I imagine sitting in that tiny room. I imagine gazing up at cascades of raven hair. I imagine with the ease of turning the page of a book, pressing the button to hear that odd little zap and watching her body fall to the ground with the passiveness of watching snow slide of a roof.

"Have you thought about killing before?"

"No."

"Have you thought about killing Ensign Little Iron?"

"No."

"Would you say you had a good relationship with Ensign Little Iron?"

For the first time, the young woman expresses emotion. With her PADD poised in hand, she squeezes her eyes shut and allows a few tears to fall. With a shuddered breath, she answers.

"She was my best friend. I loved her."

"But you killed her."

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I can't say."

"Ensign, I must remind you that you have already confessed to killing a fellow officer. Withholding information will not appease your guilty ruling."

"I understand. But I assure you, I really can't say."

Tuvok glances towards me and takes a breath.

"Brace yourself kiddo" I think to myself

"Three months ago, you had been captured by an unknown alien race…"

Had it already been three months? On earth a season has changed. We have travelled a good couple thousand lightyears. But I can almost sense the cool stillness of that prison cell.

"…it is clear you have suffered from your time there. Would you agree?" Tuvok inquires

The Ensign glances at me but quickly looks away. She looks to be more embarrassed than hurt.

"Yes."

"At anytime during your capture, were you ever coerced to take action against the Federation?"

The question seemed fair. The question was logical. But something far off in the depth of my consciousness alerts me of something amiss. The cogs and gears of my mind feels as though they were submerged in mud.

"I can't say"

"Why is that?"

"I don't remember I…."

Their words fade out ever so slightly as I force the gears to turn, as I force myself match the science to the emotion. I place my fingers against my temple. Im embarrassed to admit, it literally hurts to think. It literally hurts to do my job.

"….Captain?" I hear someone say.

"Have we heard the Doctor's report on the Ensign shortly after her abduction?" I hear myself ask

"It was in your briefing but it is a private matter" Tuvok replies

"It's private until it is used as evidence in the court of law, Commander" I fire back "It is clear we will be reviewing an intricate and delicate matter that will highly effect this case. Though I trust the Doctor's discretion, I suggest we take a break to give him time to prepare the evidence as needed. We reconvene in fifteen minutes."

I rise quickly and though they fumble slightly from the sudden change of events, so does the rest of my fellow officers. I turn to exit when a thought hits me. Without hesitation, my hand reaches out to grab my first officer's wrist.

"Chakotay" I say with hushed urgency "Where's BE'lanna?"