Chapter 24

Naruto had experienced frustration before, but never the likes of this. He stared at his own, cruelly smirking reflection and sighed, putting his fists down and crossing his legs. The mirror followed suit, though its demeanor suggested it was doing that under its own free will as a way to mock him. "We've been at this for a few days now. What do you want?"

The mirror shrugged. The only difference between Naruto and the mirror was that its eyes were black and red instead of white and blue. "You know what I want. I'm you."

"You're not me," Naruto was quick say, just like he had said time and time before whenever it made the assertion that they were the same. He blew air out his mouth, toying with various ideas in his mind. "If you're me, then what I want will set me free, right? Once I get that, I'll have control of Kurama's chakra."

If the mirror was at all threatened by the way Naruto spoke, he didn't show it. "Maybe. It depends on what you want."

"Will finding Sasuke set me free?"

"No."

"Will eating ramen set me free?"

"No."

"Will fucking my hot wives set me free?"

"That's a definite no."

Naruto went to list all of his banal enjoyments and casual fancies and was met with the same answer over and over again. He even tried delving into his mind, teasing at what the mirror could want. When that didn't work, he tried to figure it out like a riddle and was about as effective at it as he was with any other riddle: not at all.

He ended their 'conversation' by letting his head fall into his hands as he screamed into his palms. "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!"

"You know what I want. I'm you."

Naruto sighed. "No you're not," he said silently. Fighting it didn't work. In fact, it did just the opposite. He had tried to muscle his way through the night before and all the way up to the evening of the second day when he tried to actually talk to it. It was morning on the third and he was just as close now as he was then. And he was really starting to hate that fucking smirking face.

His eyes narrowed at the mirror. Dark Naruto. "You know what I want?" he asked suddenly. Dark Naruto's eyes perked up and he straightened out his back, putting his hands on his knees and listening with rapt attention. "I want to be strong enough to beat the shit out of you, so I can go back with everyone to Mist and prepare for… for whatever swirly-face has in store for me."

"Are you sure that's what you want?" Dark Naruto asked, grinning like a madman about to get exactly what he wanted.

Looking up, concern on his brow, Naruto considered this new response. Was he sure? Pretty damn sure. "Yes," Naruto said as seriously as he could. "That's what I want."

Dark Naruto's grin fell. "Man, I didn't think I acted like this much of a child."

"If that's not what you want, then what is?"

"You know what I want!"

Naruto's lips curled up in a snarl. "That's not what I want!"

"Yes it is!" Dark Naruto stood up explosively, a look of utmost and profound rage glimmering behind his eyes. "You sit there and winge and moan and complain and piss yourself like a little fucking child when all you have to do is admit what you fucking want and you don't fucking do it! Do you enjoy pain? Do you enjoy suffering for others? Do you like playing the martyr?"

"I JUST DON'T WANT ANYONE I LOVE TO BE HURT!"

"And you would rather be hurt in their stead."

Naruto shrugged. He couldn't help but feel he was getting pulled into the way of thinking that Dark Naruto employed and that couldn't end well. "Yes. I would."

Dark Naruto smiled like a demon. "But you can't. Because you're weak." He spoke the work 'weak' like he would a contemptable person. A thing that could only be reviled. "You're weaker than them and you hate yourself for it. No matter how much they love you or tell you how strong you are because of your feelings, it doesn't work because you know how fucking worthless you are when the shit hits the fan."

Naruto's lips pressed into a thin line. His own rage was bubbling up as he listened to his 'other half' speak. "You're wrong," Naruto said.

Dark Naruto found that hilarious. "If I'm wrong, then so are you. And what does that make us? Admit it and set yourself free. You hate yourself because you're weak. Speak it. Put it into words. Make it real. Realer than the both of us put together."

Naruto, sour faced, turned away from Dark Naruto and walked away from the waterfall. His mirror started laughing. A broken sort of laughter that sounded like it could only be produced from an animal or a monster.

Whatever trance he had been put under while talking to Dark Naruto broke and he found himself blinking at a normal wall of falling water. By his side, Fu was cross-legged with a peaceful, nearly sleeping face as she looked toward the water. He hoped she was finding whatever it was that she needed, but he doubted it. Whatever troubles he had faced, she was facing two-fold, it seemed. Or, if not directly more, then it was definitely having a terrible impact on her psyche.

After the first day of no progress, she had secluded herself in a shell and spoke to anyone bitterly and rudely. She didn't want to talk and she didn't want help. She wanted to sulk and hate and be alone. The second day was very worrisome in comparison. After a second fruitless session, it seemed like she rubber banded the opposite direction. She was full of frenetic energy, doing her best to love life and do things and talk and be talked to and laugh and kiss and writhe and entangle. But it was sickly sweet. It was false. An act to make everyone, even her, think she was alright. She wasn't.

She wanted to have sex with him and he didn't want to. It didn't feel right. Like he was taking advantage of her in some strange way. Like he was enabling her. She crashed when she heard that, devolving into a hysterical bout that he couldn't help her from no matter how hard he tried. He just stayed awake with her until she fell asleep. It was the only thing he could do.

And now it was the third day and he didn't know what to expect.

He stood up and turned around, walking away from the waterfall. Almost immediately, he was beset upon by Yugito. She pounced forward, hope in her eyes as she grabbed a hold of his hands, bringing them close to her. "Did it work? Have you conquered your dark half?"

She had taken his early departure as sign of progress. Seeing that light in her eyes only made it worse for him when his expression lowered, saddened. Her smile didn't go away, but her eyes changed. From hopeful to consolatory. "Oh, don't worry," she said softly. "I couldn't get the hang of it for ten years. Don't lose hope just yet."

That last string of words yanked at the fibers surrounding his heart. "Then when do I lose hope?" he asked, a deep unsettling pain in his words.

She didn't have a response other than to frown with him and tuck his chin into the cranny of her neck. "I hate that you're in pain," she said, voice shuddering as she spoke, close to tears as she was. "It… When I look and you and know that you're feeling bad, I can't help but feel bad too. Because I love you. And you being happy is just about the only thing I need in this world. And it hurts so much because I feel like I can't do anything for you. I can't help you. You've helped me so much, you always knew the exact right things to say and I can't say anything back now when you really need it."

They stayed like that for a minute or two, sharing each other's warmth. Eventually, he disengaged and smiled at her, or at least he tried to, and said "Thanks." And he tried to not let tears spring to his eyes when he added "I'm going for a walk. I'll be back later."

00000000

The dinner they all ate that night would have been noted for being tense. That is, it would have if everyone ate together. Naruto didn't return until much later into the night and Fu took the food from the cafeteria into her room, not saying a work to either Yugito, Bee, or the other cloud ninja who had come with under pretenses of security. It left the two remaining Jinchuuriki to eating a solitary meal together; the first they'd had in a very long time.

Bee's personality hadn't changed at all since Yugito last saw him and she was intensely grateful for that. Not even the brink of death kept him from being in high spirits, spitting rhymes out with such frequency that she sometimes wondered if what he said was what he felt or just something needed for a little bit of verbal artistry. She laughed at some of his tricks of gab, but they only helped to alleviate her worry slightly. In truth, through it all, Naruto and Fu weighed heavily on her mind. It was made worse by her seeming incompetency to help them in the slightest.

After one such bout of giggling from his words, Yugito fell silent, her face stone cold. The question had been weighing on her mind for a while, biding its time until she didn't have any other choice than to speak it. "Bee… have you ever been in love?"

The depth of the question coupled with the way she asked it, made him pause in his word smithing so he could consider the question seriously. After a few seconds he said "Can't say I have. I get a hunny every now and then, but that's for the then and now, not for the later, you dig?"

She smiled a little bit, already anticipating that sort of answer. Through all her interactions with him, she never got a good 'deep' conversation out of him. From the outset, he was a simple man with simple thoughts, simple desires, and simple… well, everything. But every now and then, she would get glimpses of the depth within, if that was a good way of saying it. She didn't know if he hid it all with a mask, or just chose not to dwell on it. Most of all, she guessed he just didn't find it very interesting. After all, who cared about all that mumbo jumbo pile of interwoven feelings? It didn't matter to him and he didn't pretend it did. And that, she respected.

Of course, that was going off of the presumption that her most liked interpretation was correct. And it could very well not be. She kept it anyways.

"You lookin for advice for the little ones?" He asked, mouth full of food.

The differences between him and Naruto were both profoundly few and profoundly many. "I don't think you could help with that," she settled on. "And don't call him 'little one'. He's my husband."

Bee showed his palms and nodded. "Guess you're right on that part. Sometimes we have go through things alone, pick a bone with our dreaded foe. Conquer and rise, feel apart from the traumatize, oh yeah."

Though she did smile, she couldn't laugh anymore. The haven that Bee was for her started to lose its luster. Worry was gnawing at her. She wondered what would even happen if she took Matatabi's cloak. Obviously, one could revert back to when they hadn't conquered their self, if Fu was of any indication. Would all that worry and doubt make her unable to use Mata's chakra? She didn't know. And she knew she had to find out, but she also didn't want to.

00000000

Fu sat in the corner of her rickety bed, knees drawn to her chest with her arms wrapped around them. The only source of light was from a beam of moon shining through a small window near the ceiling. She'd been sad, happy, angry, distraught, pensive, jealous, horny, and every and any other emotional feeling or sensation under the sun. Now, she was done. Done with it all.

"Does that mean you're giving up?" Chomei asked.

Fu sighed. "I don't know. I just don't want to think about it anymore."

"There's a lot counting on you…"

"Oh, don't you worry. I'm aware."

The Dark Fu wasn't as forthcoming with conversation as Dark Naruto was, from what she could discern. Dark Naruto spoke, at least. From what she could tell, Dark Fu was more like Dark Yugito than anything else. When she tried to talk to it, it just… sat there and laughed. Not a dark laugh or a slanted laugh or a bemused, mirthful, joyous laugh. She laughed hysterically. Like she was front seat to a joke of the highest degree.

It didn't do well for her self-esteem. Or, really any aspect of her mental fortitude for that matter. She couldn't make heads or tails of it. She didn't know why she lost control in cloud and she hated herself for it. There weren't any fatalities, but people got hurt.

Naruto got hurt.

"Why is this happening?" she whispered to herself, not for the first time just that hour. She was supposed to be in control. That was her thing. She was a self-encapsulated, self-driving, self-needing force of nature. She was fully aware of her inner self and all its foibles and she accepted that. And from that acceptance, she got her power. But now that was gone and with it, anything she was proud of herself for.

Even if her dark self didn't speak to her, she at least had the benefit of having once perfected the use of Chomei's chakra and also that she had a time frame for when she lost it. In theory, all she had to do was to track any changes in psyche between when she last used it perfectly (the mission to save Bee) and when she lost control in cloud.

But then again, most plans work in theory. Few ever survive implementation.

For the life of her, she couldn't figure out what might have happened between those two periods of time. She felt the same. Maybe not now, but she had confidence in her ability to use Chomei's chakra when she lost control of it. It was infuriating. And her dark self wasn't of any help, just sitting there staring at her while she puzzled it out. Its lung-choking laughter driving her mad, all the while.

"What's wrong with me?" She whispered, pulling her head back until it was touching the cold concrete wall. Selfish? Check. Flighty? Check. Insensitive? Check. There were bad things about her, but there were also good ones. She listened to people. Gave them the benefit of the doubt. Was averse to great displays of negative emotion. She tended to open up more to others. Those were good things.

She was those things and she accepted herself for them. Hell, she didn't even know that that was the reason why she had control of Chomei's chakra in the first place. She was self-taught. It was only after conversing with Yugito that she came to know about controlling tailed beasts' chakras in the more traditional sense.

So what was missing now? She wasn't in denial. At least not consciously. She didn't know what she was doing wrong. She didn't know what could be happening. She thought she had self-reflection in spades. She thought she was a paragon of mental health. And now she wasn't. And that was worrying.

A knock on the door brought her out of another bout of spiraling thought which would inevitably lead to nowhere. She tried to speak to beckon them in, but only a scratchy moan came out of her mouth at first. She'd cried and screamed the last two days enough to wreck her voice. Clearing her voice, Fu whisper-yelled "Come in."

The heavy metal door shuddered and squealed forward, its joints old and rusted. A long red mop of hair pushed its head in cautiously along with a strip of light from the outside. Fu quirked her head to the side. The woman looked familiar, but she couldn't place a name to the face.

"Hey," the woman said, no small amount of trepidation in her word. "Is this a bad time?"

Fu shook her head, not trusting her voice.

The muscles in Karui's legs tensed and untensed. Her body wasn't sure what move to make. "Do you mean, it is a bad time, or…"

Fu shook her head and cleared her throat. "It's okay," she tried to say. Her voice was scratchy and foreign. She sounded like a senior citizen who'd smoked since they were 2.

Karui stepped in and closed the door behind her. It clicked shut and with it, the only source of direct light. She blinked a bit and felt around for the nearest chair, sitting unevenly while her eyes adjusted.

After a few moments of terse silence, Fu squinted at her and said "Uhm… I'm sorry. I don't think we've met…"

Karui squinted at her in return, but ultimately, she looked away. "Yeah, I know. I'm Karui. I… uhm…" she let out a breath of air, eyes turning downwards. She cupped her head in her hands. "I don't even know why I'm here, to be honest."

Fu waited for a couple seconds for her to follow up. "In… what sense? The world? The giant turtle?"

"This room."

"Ah."

Another bout of silence. It was starting to get Fu frustrated. "Look, if you have something to say, then could you… you know, get on with it?"

Karui tapped her index finger against her knee. "In cloud, when you lost control, there was a group of kids trapped in an area between buildings. Their teacher was knocked out and they were scared. We were on our way to help, but before we got to them, Naruto, your husband was already there. He was helping the kids out of the area. And then you launched a giant bijuu bomb and instead of running away from it then and there, he dove back in to save the last little kid in there. He ran out and tossed her over at my friend. Then the ball hit him and I thought he was dead."

With every word out of the woman's mouth, Fu's attitude worsened. Her talking just made all the memories come back to her and with it, all the feelings of self-loathing. She'd almost killed those children.

"I just…" she continued on. "I just wanted to thank him, but he'd not here right now. And he didn't look like he was in the right mood for it either. So, I came in here." Karui wasn't expecting a response and she didn't get one. But she also didn't want to leave on that note either. "He's a hero, you know."

"Could you please leave?"

Fu's voice was quiet and defeated when she requested that. Karui was halfway to obliging her, but something she couldn't quite explain made her stop. "I don't… I don't blame you, if that's what you think."

"Could… please go."

Karui's face didn't fall at the order. "Yugito lost control sometimes too," she said softly. At not hearing an order to leave again, she continued on. "She never killed anyone, thankfully, but she came close on more than one occasion. Nearly ripped the head off of one of her teammates. Doesn't really spar too well anymore because she avoids blows to the head at all costs. And, uh… I wasn't alive when it was happening, but I heard that before Bee, Kumo had a really hard time finding Jinchuuriki for Gyuki. They'd go crazy every now and then and kill a few people. So, uh, hey… at least you're not the worst rampaging giant monster to lay waste to Kumo. Not even by a country mile." Karui laughed lightly at the end of her story, hoping to liven the girl up a little bit. Even just a little would do.

She peeked her head up over her knees. "That doesn't change the fact that I hurt people. I hurt them a lot. And if Naruto wasn't a Jinchuuriki-" Her voice caught on itself, sudden choking sobs wracking her throat. Her eyes were wet with tears again. "If anything happened to him… If I had done anything to him… I wouldn't be able to forgive myself. I lost control when I shouldn't have and because of that, I nearly murdered the person I care most about in this world. And as a cherry on top, I have no idea why. I have no idea if it could happen again. I have no idea how to stop it."

Karui shrugged, a small frown appearing on her face. "I'm not much help in that regard. Bee, he's my teacher. And he never really addressed the topic before. From what I hear, it was as easy as walking for him, though. Yugito… well, you know her story better than I do, I bet."

She did. Fu had come to her with her tail between her legs to ask for advice on how to control the chakra. The woman tried; she really did, but nothing helped her in the slightest. And as terrible as it was to understand… her happiness really irked Fu. It wasn't too long ago that Fu was the one in complete control of everything in her life while Yugito merely pretended she did. The tables flipped with such speed that she was still reeling. "What do I do?" Fu asked helplessly. She wasn't looking for an answer and she wasn't expecting one, but Karui still spoke up.

"I don't know. Being a Jinchuuriki is hard. Like, really hard. But at least you care about other people. That's something that's a lot more rare than people understand."

Fu tilted her head up, eyes half-lidded and flat. "I don't care about other people. I'm selfish. I only care about myself and how I feel."

One of Karui's eyebrows shot up, a look of disbelief evident on her face. "You're joking right? You nearly broke down into tears because you thought you might have hurt a bunch of kids. You're in love with someone. You're torturing yourself over your actions that might have put people in danger. That's just about the least selfish thing I could think of."

Fu's forehead impacted the knees that she had drawn up to her chest. It wasn't like that. She was still selfish. She only cared about herself. The only reason she was around Naruto was because it made her feel good to be around him. The only reason she was friends with all the people she was friends with was because it made her happy. The reason she hated herself because she had almost hurt innocents…

The girl sighed and flopped over on her bed. "I'll pass along the message. Dearest is a hero. Thanks for coming in. Could you please go?"

This time, Karui did acquiesce, opening the door with a squeal of rusted metal on rusted metal, and pushing it back close.

00000000

Naruto walked among the ancient trees, tangled with vines and moss and large insects. He took in a deep breath of salty ocean air and sat down in a small clearing, crossing his legs and closing his eyes. Meditation was a good way to get in contact with Kurama, but that wasn't his intention this time. Now, he was doing something Yugito had softly suggested he do. Clear his mind and get in rhythm with the world. It was something he would normally be averse to doing, but without a better alternative, he didn't really have much of a better idea of what to do. He'd rather bash his skull into a brick wall than talk to Dark Naruto again.

From what Yugito told him, meditation wasn't quite about clearing his mind. Only masters could clear their mind. It was about 'noticing when the mind strayed and correcting'. It was supposed to teach mental discipline. That was something he lacked in some capacity, he supposed. If he were to be honest, it felt like a futile effort, though. As depressing as it sounded to mull over, everything seemed pointless to him at that point. Nothing felt like it would help. And agreeing to Dark Naruto's terms felt to him like making a deal with the devil. There was no winning for him.

Taking in his first deep breath of air, he closed his eyes and tried to focus on his surroundings. The trickle of water, the rustle of leaves, the screeches of animals off in the distance. It was easy to listen, but very difficult not to think. There were different parts of his psyche with different loudnesses that compounded on each other at every distraction. They pulled his mind in every direction it could go in; directions he didn't want it to go. Every direction was a spiral into the worst possible scenario imaginable. It was like his brain was a focal point for whirlpools of depression to launch from. And pulling it back from those spirals was like pushing a boulder up a hill just to watch it roll down every time.

He hated it.

"FUCK!" he shouted suddenly, overwhelmed by the situation he was in. Everything led to shit! And the worst part was that he was surrounded with everything he ever wanted and he still wasn't happy. A loving family and good friends. That's all he wanted and now he had it and he was still sad that was fucking infuriating.

Something flinched in front of him, unsettling the leaves and scaring the dick out of him. In front of him was a giant snake at least as thick as some of the tree trunks in the forest. How hadn't he heard that thing sneak up on him? He pulled out a kunai and got into a fighting position. He didn't have a good track record with giant snakes.

"Don't be scared," it said. "I was just curious about you."

Naruto put his knife away, but he didn't relax just yet. The forest did have quite a shocking amount of giant animals, but he wasn't on good terms with them yet. And also, well, snakes. "Curious about what?"

It uncoiled itself and slithered up a nearby tree, draping itself across the huge boughs. Its coloration was that of an anaconda's and its voice was difficult to discern whether it was feminine or masculine. "About why a human would be closing its eyes in the middle of a dark and dangerous forest."

"I was… meditating," he said unsurely. "I didn't think anything would sneak up on me."

"I wasn't making an effort to. You were just lost in thought, I guess."

"Guess so."

When the snake didn't get anything more from Naruto, it tilted its head and stared at him questioningly. Rather than slitted, its eyes were round and surprisingly human-looking. He couldn't tell whether that made him feel more or less on-edge. It chuckled a little bit. "What's got your goat? If you don't me asking."

Naruto sat back down, grabbing his thighs. "It's a bit of a long story. And I don't think it would make much sense if I told it to you anyway."

It hummed a little bit and relaxed back on the tree. "Indulge me some, would you? This island is all territory disputes and pissing contests."

He looked at the ground in front of him, trying to figure out a way to word the situation he was in. "I… I guess… I'm sad and don't have any motivation and I don't know why because I have everything I wanted in life."

The snake considered his words and nodded along. "Depressed then, huh?"

"Yeah," he sighed out. "Depressed."

"What do you have that you wanted?"

He pursed his lips. "Friends, family, people I love and who love me back. Those kinds of things."

The snake considered his words again. "Well, what do you do?"

Naruto looked up at it. "What do you mean?"

"Occupation, hobby, trade… what do you do?"

"I'm a ninja."

"A strong one?"

"Y-" he stuttered. He was strong. That much he was sure of. It was just that he wasn't strong enough. "Yes. I'm strong. I just… I need to be stronger. And I can't get to the next level without making a deal with the devil."

"That sounds ominous."

"It's not the actual devil," he said softly. "It's like… I don't know what it's like. It's the, uhh… the dark part of me, I guess. It wants me to… to admit that I hate myself because I'm weaker than the ones I love and that I feel like I can't protect them at all."

"Does it speak the truth?"

He shook his head furiously. "Of course not. I love them. I love them more than anything."

"But it's you."

"It's not me. It's everything I hate."

It coiled around the tree and went back to the ground below, slithering in and out of the clearing. "Everything you hate about you is still you."

Without a word more, it made its way out the area, leaving Naruto on his own.

00000000

It was another tense dinner for Yugito. The cafeteria was empty except for her, Naruto and Fu. They were grinding away at their meals in silence, refusing to meet eyes with anyone at the table. Her heart ached for them; it really did. There was something about seeing someone who you loved in pain while not being able to anything that ate away at that person. Somewhere, she knew that the best thing she could do for the both of them was to just be there for them and offer encouragement. It hadn't been that long, less than a week for all three, but every second felt like forever when your significant other (others, in this case) was chronically sad.

"So, uhm," Yugito paused to gulp hard. She'd been pondering whether or not to bring up any mentions of progress. Her body made that decision for her. "Any… insights?"

"I…" Naruto started immediately before considering whether or not it was actually a good idea to divulge what was on his mind. "I talked to a giant snake," he settled on.

Yugito blinked. That wasn't quite an answer she was thinking she'd get. "A… A snake?"

He nodded. "Giant one."

"…What did it have to say, if you don't mind me asking?"

He chewed his food slowly, sifting through his memories to try and summarize their encounter. "I don't know," he said. "Asked me about my problems and told me that I was shit."

Yugito looked back down to her food. "That… can't be good for your mental outlook," she said with a slight upward tick in cadence, hoping to draw some laughter out of him.

She didn't get any. He hummed an affirmative and went back to his food.

The clanging of metal on metal brought their attention to Fu, who had dropped her fork on the table. Her face was distraught and she looked to be near tears. "I…" she started unevenly. Her voice was still scratchy from the past couple of days, but it was at least better than last night. She looked up and saw that both Naruto and Yugito were looking at her with rapt attention. "I'm selfish," she said with such a heavy shake in her voice that both thought they misheard her.

"I'm selfish," she continued on. "I've already told you, Naruto, but I haven't told you, Yugito. That's where my power came from, originally, my power to control Chomei's chakra. Rather than looking to others to validate me, I only looked inward. I loved myself and that was enough for me to use the power. And it was real, too. I filled up the hole in my heart all by myself. But now… I'm not sure if the hole got bigger or I just got smaller, because it's not enough anymore. And more to the point, it's not true. I mean, I still love myself; I don't think that changed. But now… now I love you two. The both of you. Same goes for Kurotsuchi and Temari and Mei. Hell, same goes for Sakura and maybe even Kakashi and Jiraiya and Ai and Onoki and Shibuki. I love them all. But that means I can't be selfish anymore. I care about people now. I… I hurt people back in cloud. I hurt," her voice closed with a sob and she had to take a second to regain use of her voice. "I hurt you, Naruto. If you weren't there, I would have killed children. But you were there and you saved them, but I still hurt you." She clutched at the fabric above her heart. "And that knowledge that I hurt someone I love more than I love myself just tears me apart. It's hard to forgive myself even if you have."

Tears began to spill from the girl's eyes like miniature waterfalls. Yugito quickly got out of her seat so she could sit next to the girl and wrapped her arms around her smaller frame. She rested her cheek on the top of her head and held her close. Naruto scooted closer and wrapped an arm around her waist as well, joining Yugito.

"I don't think I'm selfish anymore," the girl said helplessly. "I think I care too much about people. I'm not sure if that's good or bad anymore. But I know it's true. Dark Fu would only laugh and laugh at me when I talked to her. Nothing to say. Like I was just a big joke. And in a way, I was. The answer was right in front of me, but I just had to accept it."

As she spoke, insectoid wings formed from her back and chitinous purple material traveled up her body, eventually covering her skin in armor. "I'm back," she said, looking up at the ceiling with a bright smile on her tear-stained face. "I'm back.

00000000

"So?" It asked as a huge, toothy smile reaching across its face from ear to ear. "Anything you want to say to me?"

Naruto looked down at his hands splayed on either leg. He was sitting down, hunched over, nothing much on his mind to say and nothing much in his eyes to denote any passion or motivation. He looked dead to the world. He hadn't slept the night before and forewent eating breakfast the next day. All around him, everything was gray. That's the way the world looked. That's the way the world had looked the past week or so. He hadn't wanted to do anything. He just… moved with the tide of the world, doing what others had told him to do.

It was pathetic.

He was aware of it. He was aware others were aware of it. He didn't like it. He knew others didn't like it. It was hurting Yugito and it was hurting Fu and he wanted to find something to make things different but he didn't know how to do anything to make it work. He could change, or he could stay the same. Both frightened him beyond belief.

Change.

Change?

He was a way he didn't want to be, but what was the alternative? What did he want to be? He could be different, but what would he be after he changed? Strong? Kind? Smart? Charismatic? Nothing called to him.

"Or… you could just be you?" Dark Naruto said seductively. It made the situation sound so simple. He wanted to be different, didn't he?

Didn't he?

He liked color. He liked how the glint of the sun reflected off of Yugito's hair. That was good. He liked it better when she smiled while doing it. If she was doing it to him, even better. He liked the sound of Fu's laughter becoming louder or quieter as she zoomed about. He liked hearing Mei and Kurotsuchi bicker and snicker. He liked kissing Temari.

He liked those things and he wanted to experience them more. He liked the color, the sound, the taste.

And Fu cut both her arms off, sacrificing them so that she could survive. Yugito had her limbs pierced by iron tendrils. Gaara died. Mei and all the other kage stayed behind so that he could he could move forward and was knocked out immediately. He was useless at every juncture.

He hated those things and he wanted them to be different. But they couldn't be different. They were in the past. They were fact. They couldn't be changed. And he could promise himself that it wouldn't be the same in the future, but he didn't know that and he hated it.

"I hate myself because I'm weaker than them," he murmured. "They're stronger than me and I can't protect them. And I feel weak and useless because of that."

Dark Naruto's smile fell away like broken glass from a window. Its face went neutral and it let out a deep breath.

"Jiraiya gave me three pieces of advice a bit ago in rock. You remember them, don't you? Of course you do. You're me. We're the same," Dark Naruto took a breath to interrupt, but Naruto didn't let him the time. "One: don't lie to the ones you love. Two: Life's not fucking fair. Three: life's what you make of it. I kinda ignored him and I think I'm suffering for it. I've lied to myself. I lied to you and I shouldn't have done that. It gave you power that you shouldn't have. Life's not fair and I pretended like it should have been. And I pigeon-holed myself into one area and failed in that area and when I failed, I failed in everything and when I failed in everything, I lost myself."

Dark Naruto's eyes went half-lidded and he couldn't meet Naruto's gaze anymore. The original walked up to it and rested a hand on its shoulder. He was smiling. It was a sort of melancholy smile; happy, but also sad. He couldn't figure out why. It was a bit odd knowing that Dark Naruto was going to go away, even if he never was going to vanish completely. He just wasn't going to be pushed away anymore.

And then he wasn't there anymore. Naruto was looking at a waterfall, crashing down into a small pond rolling underneath his feet. He turned around and Fu and Yugito were standing there, smiling at him. And he smiled back and them and laughed. And they smiled back and laughed too, jumping forward to cross the distance and wrap him in a big hug.

And he wasn't sad anymore.