Time: Hypothetical future
Outside Konoha. Thirteen years after Kyūbi.
"This is a joke, right?" Kakashi tried to rub a finger in one ear, but he was firmly caught in Itachi's Tsukuyomi and chained down. Blasted Uchiha prodigies. Blasted Uchiha sense of humor.
"This is not a joke, Kakashi-san." The red-eyed traitor met Kakashi's gaze with an expression that was far too serious.
"Really? Because I thought I just heard a traitor that murdered his own mother ask to marry my daughter. In what universe is that not a joke?"
"You know me," the traitor replied.
"No," said Kakashi, feeling his sanity slip out of the genjutsu without him, "I knew you, and up until now I was willing to give you the benefit of a doubt. Now I know you really are insane. Congratulations."
The teenage Uchiha shrugged. "I know it seems strange, but—"
Kakashi snorted. "My twelve-year-old daughter, Itachi. This really must be your ultimate genjutsu technique if you think you can convince me to go with that."
"I was raised this way," the Uchiha explained. "Your consent is something I value immensely."
Kill me now, Kakashi thought, choosing to ignore the inconsistencies with the Uchiha's whole mass-murderer reputation. Lethal Itachi was one thing. Hopeful son-in-law? Nope. Nope, nope. Nope. "And you think torturing me will get you that?"
Itachi pulled a sword out of the air casually. "Well, I figured I may as well start early."
~It came to me a few minutes ago. Now let's never speak of it again. I think this might qualify as crack.
Okay, I guess I'll reply to those darling reviews now. Anon replies: Gal (Oh, I will! Just not this bit of it) and Guest (Sure, if you insist)—thanks!
Sorry it short I not care. It was just a concept, anyway. (;