*TW for cancer*
Also, tissue warning.
It's going to get dark the next few chapters but I promise you, things will turn out in the end.

(Maybe)

Enjoy some Maddie/Liam hurt/comfort angst.

'Maddie...' The teen glanced up for a moment as Liam walked over to where she was sitting on the ground in the backyard. 'Thought I might find you out here. Mind if I join you?'

Maddie shook her head and Liam took a seat beside her, the girl playing with some blades of grass.

'Needed to get some air, hey?'

'Yeah...' She replied with a soft sigh. 'Couldn't-couldn't stay inside much longer.'

'Not fair getting to watch everyone else eating and you can't.'

'Mmm... Something like that.' She pulled another few blades of grass up, rolling them between her fingers.

Liam looked down at his niece. 'Maddie, what's wrong?'

'I-I'm okay.' She replied, keeping her voice as steady as she could. 'I'm fine. You don't have to worry about me.'

'What did I say before about letting other people be strong for you?' He questioned softly. 'I'm here for you Maddie. You don't have to deal with this on your own.'

Maddie felt the tears coming to her eyes and she swallowed back the lump in her throat. 'I-I'm scared... Uncle Liam.' She finally said after a long moment.

'Come here honey.' He held out an arm to her, inviting her in for a hug. Maddie moved over close to him and he held her tight against him.

'It-It just kinda hit me... You know.' She sniffled after a moment. 'It-it feels real now and I-I'm...' Her voice broke as she looked up at him. 'I'm scared.'

Liam kissed her head gently as she began to sob softly.

After a moment Maddie wrestled her emotions under control once more, wiping her eyes on the back of her hand. 'I-I'm sorry.'

'It's okay.' He assured her. 'Talk to me kiddo. What's going on?'

She looked up at him, her eyes still shining with tears. 'I don't want to die.'

Liam felt his heart break at those words.

'I-I have too much to live for.' Maddie continued. 'I know where I'm going if I die and that's not what I'm scared of. It's what I'd leave behind. I don't want to leave you. My family.' Her voice broke again and she had to swallow the lump in her throat down again. 'And Dad... I know Dad's trying so hard to be strong for me... for all of us but I know he's breaking inside and I just wish there was something I could do to fix it.'

'You always think of everyone around you, that's part of what makes you so special.' He replied after a moment. 'But you can't fix everything.'

'I know...' She bit her lip, looking at the crushed blades of grass between her fingers. 'I-I don't think I can do this, Uncle Liam. I don't think I can go through with having the surgery.'

'Why Maddie?'

'I-I know it sounds silly.' Maddie didn't look at him as she struggled to get her thoughts into words. 'Because I know without it, I will die but I-I'm not ready. I-I'm too scared. Can we just cancel it?'

He shook his head. 'We can't cancel it Maddie. I'm sorry.'

'It was worth a shot.' She exclaimed with a dry chuckle. 'Oh god...' She looked up at the sky above, a few clouds floating lazily by in the crisp blue sky. 'I don't know how I'm going to get through this.'

'You have our support Maddie. You don't have to feel like you are alone. Don't shut us out from trying to protect us or spare us grief, let us in.' Liam said sincerely, the girl looking at him after a moment. 'Please. Let us help you.'

'I-I don't know how.' Maddie finally admitted. 'All-all my life I-I've had to deal with things on my own. I don't know how to let anyone help me.'

'Talking about what you're going through, how you're feeling, that's usually a good place to start.'

'Yeah...' She sighed heavily. 'I guess I've just been trying to be so busy that I didn't have time to think about what was going to happen and now...' She let out a long breath. 'Now it just feels real and I'm frightened.'

'What are you frightened of?'

'Being in hospital, the surgery.' Maddie started, pausing for a moment as she held herself together. 'Not knowing if I'm gonna wake up after it or not and I know... I know that's silly because it's just the slimmest chance but that chance that I'll never wake up is there nonetheless. What if something goes wrong? What if I make it through but I change? What if I can't talk or walk or if I wake up as someone totally different then me now? What if you all leave me?'

The girl fell silent again, hugging her knees close to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. 'Are you worried we're going to leave you?'

She nodded after a moment. 'And it's silly, I know. All of this stuff is so stupid but its there and it terrifies me. My mind is a place even I don't want to go to right now.'

Liam rubbed her arm gently, still holding her close to him. 'It's not silly Maddie. Your fears are valid.'

'How do I deal with them though? How do I make them go away?'

'Well, telling them to me is a good place to start.' He replied softly. 'Have you spoken to Cordi about any of this?'

Maddie shook her head. 'Dad has enough on his plate.'

'There's your problem kiddo.'

She looked at him with surprise. 'What?'

'You keep trying to deal with this all on your own.' Liam told her gently. 'You think by keeping it to yourself you're helping us but in reality, you aren't. We can tell you are hurting but we can't help you if you won't talk about it. The only way any of us are going to get through this is if we stick together. We are stronger together than we are on our own.'

Maddie digested what he said and after a long moment of silence, looked down at the ground. 'I've been such a fool.'

'No you haven't Maddie.' He assured her. 'You are only human, just like the rest of us.'

'Can you forgive me for shutting you out?' She questioned after another pause.

Liam smiled sadly at her. 'Of course honey.'

Maddie smiled back at him. 'I'm glad you're my Uncle.'

'I'm glad to be your Uncle.' He replied, touching her cheek affectionately. 'You are a warrior, Maddie. You will get through this. You just need to believe that you can.'

She nodded. 'I-I guess the first step is talking to the rest of them and telling them the truth.'

'That's a very good place to start.'

Telling the rest of her family the truth about what she was going through was exactly what Maddie did as soon as she stepped back inside the house after her talk with Liam. She spoke to them of her fears, of why she had been trying to deal with what she was going through by herself. They all had let her talk and listened to what she had said and reassured her that they would get through this. They had each other. That was all that mattered.

When their talk had finished, Maddie spent a few minutes alone with her cat to say goodbye. Though she hoped that this wasn't the end and that she would come through the surgery just fine she still needed to do this. It was part of her being able to go into her operation without any regrets. It was just something she needed to do.

Pressing on last kiss to her cat's head she gently returned her back to her bed and grabbed her teddy bear that her family had given her for Christmas. Yes, she was sixteen but at least it was something that she could hold onto when her family couldn't be with her anymore. She checked the time quickly then grabbed her bag with what she was taking to the hospital and went through it once more. Everything was there.

Taking a deep breath she grabbed her bag and bear, heading back downstairs. Her family was gathered there waiting to go with her to the hospital and after asking Cordell if they could take a short detour before going to the hospital, they were on their way.

Maddie looked out the window as the scenery flashed by, a couple tears escaping from her eyes. She was still scared but knowing that her family was with her, supporting her, it helped a little. She could do this. She could get through this.

They stopped at the Equestrian Center, Maddie going by herself to take care of what she needed to do. Her horses had already been turned out to the pasture and that was where she headed, coming to a stop at the fence to watch them. Hope, the foal only two days old, skipped around and played as Bel kept a close eye on her. Hope was doing remarkably well considering the circumstances of her birth and Maddie smiled as the foal trotted back to her mother to have a drink.

'Maddie...' Mika remarked, her friend turning to her as she approached. 'I thought you'd be on your way to the hospital by now.'

'Just took a short detour.' Maddie replied as she looked back at her horses, Dakota having spotted her and begun ambling in their direction. 'You'll look after them for me, won't you?'

She nodded. 'You have my promise Maddie.'

Dakota stopped at the fence and she gave her a pat for a moment before speaking again. 'You've been a good friend to me Mika, I'm grateful.'

'Please don't say goodbye Maddie.' She said softly as the tears started coming to her eyes. 'This isn't goodbye. You're gonna be just fine.'

Maddie smiled sadly as she turned to her, taking her friend in her arms. 'I love you Mika.'

'I love you too sis.' Mika replied as she held her tight. 'I'll come see you, after your op, okay?'

She nodded as they finally let each other go. 'Okay. I would like that.' She turned back to her horses, Bel grazing as Hope grabbed a drink from her. 'I-I better go.' Maddie looked back at her friend. 'Look after yourself.'

Mika nodded. 'You too.'

Giving her friend one last hug Maddie left, a couple tears slipping from her eyes as she made her way back to her family waiting in the car park.

'You okay Maddie?' Cordell asked as she climbed back into the truck.

'Yeah, I'm okay.' She replied softly. 'I'm ready now.

They left the Equestrian Center to head to the hospital, Maddie staring out the window until her horses were no longer in view as a couple lone tears found their way down her cheeks. A moment later, in a shaky voice, she initiated a sing-along, her father and siblings joining along with her to the tunes of Alan Jackson's Little Bitty.

When they arrived at the hospital, Maddie choose Abeline to stay with her through the admission process and the rest of the family went to wait in a waiting room until they were called in to see her off to her surgery. Maddie was given a hospital bracelet to wear and was changed into a hospital gown then an IV needle was inserted into the back of her hand in preparation for the IV lines she would have later on. Once that was finished one of the nurses began to shave off the section of her head they would be operating on, Maddie doing her best not to cry as they cut her hair off. It seemed such a stupid thing to want to cry over, hair would grow back...

Abeline stayed with Maddie through the whole process, comforting her as best she could. Finally, Maddie was ready for the surgery and she was taken to another room where her family could come in and see her before they took her into the operation.

'Hey Maddie.'

'Rosie girl.' Maddie smiled as best she could as Rose came over to the bed, holding her arms out to take her in a hug. 'I didn't expect to see you here.'

'I wanted mommy to bring me in.' She replied softly, hugging her over the side of the bed. 'What happened to your hair?' She asked, motioning to Maddie's partially shaved head.

'That's so they can operate.' She explained, her family hanging back so she could have a moment alone with the girl.

'It'll grow back though, won't it?'

Maddie nodded. 'It will, in time.'

'That's good.' Rose pulled over a chair and climbed on top, holding onto a brown plush pony. 'I have something for you.'

'You have, have you?'

'I call him Charlie.' She said as she held the pony out to her. 'He helps me when I get scared but I thought you might need him today.'

Tears came to Maddie's eyes as she took hold of the little plushie, touched by how thoughtful a gesture it was. 'Thank you Rose.'

Rose smiled. 'You take good care of him for me, won't you?'

'I will.'

Jenny came back over, placing a hand on her daughter's shoulder. 'It's time to go now Rose, we better let Maddie's family have some time with her, okay?'

'Okay Mommy.' Rose gave the older girl another hug. 'I love you Maddie.'

'I love you too Rose.' She replied. 'You do good at school today.'

'I will.'

Jenny placed her hand on Maddie's shoulder. 'Good luck Maddie.'

'Thank you, ma'am. And thank you, for everything.'

She smiled, understanding exactly what the teen was referring to. 'Alright Rose, let's go.'

Rose waved to her as she left, Maddie waving back to her until she was gone.

'Need a tissue?' Abeline questioned gently.

She nodded, wiping her eyes on the tissue that was handed to her. 'Thanks.'

A moment later, a soft knock sounded on the door frame. 'It okay if we come in?' Captain James questioned, Cassie and Trey behind him.

'Yeah, yeah.' Cordell nodded. 'Come on in.'

'Maddie.'

She smiled at him as she shook his hand. 'Morning sir.'

'Cassie and I just wanted to drop in and wish you well.' Larry said to her. 'I know you're on the clock and want to spend time with your family so we won't stay long.'

'I brought you these.' Cassie said, bringing out a small bouquet of flowers from behind her back to give her as the Captain went over to speak with her family. 'Your Dad said that wildflowers are your favorite.'

'They are.' Maddie smiled as she took them, breathing in the sweet scent for a moment. 'Thank you Cassie.'

'Glad you like them.'

'Come here.' She held an arm out to her, Cassie coming over for a hug. 'I really appreciate them.' She told her with a smile. 'I'll have Mawline keep them safe for me.'

'Okay.' She lingered for a moment, not really sure what else to say. 'Well... I um... I better get going again. I'll come see you again real soon.'

Maddie nodded. 'I'm looking forward to it.' Cassie slipped out quietly and Trey came over to take her place. 'Hey Coach.'

'You know, you don't have to call me coach when I'm not technically your teacher.' Trey pointed out with a smile.

She chuckled at that. 'Well, it's what Stella and Augie call you so it kinda sticks. You don't mind, do you?'

'Not at all, little Walker.' He assured her. 'Now don't worry Maddie. These guys here, they're the best of the best. You'll be in great hands with them.'

'I know.'

'I'll come visit later too, I've got some videos from your birthday party to show you.'

'Oh no...' Maddie groaned and he laughed. 'I hope they aren't embarrassing.'

'No, not really. Well, I did get that pretty spectacular tumble of yours off that bull on camera.'

'Instant replay hey?'

'Yeah, you got it.' He placed his hand on her shoulder. 'All the best, little Walker.'

Maddie smiled at him. 'Thank you Coach.'

Trey headed out, Geri slipping in just as he left. 'I hope I'm not intruding-'

'You aren't.' Maddie assured her. 'I'm glad you're here Geri.'

'Wouldn't be anywhere else.' She replied, taking a seat in the chair beside her. 'How are you feeling?'

'A little nervous. Scared.'

Geri nodded in understanding. 'I used to feel the exact same way before my operations too. You know what helped though?'

'What?'

'My Dad would sing to me before they'd take me in, I would play it over in my mind as they put me under.'

'I don't think Dad is gonna want to do that in front of everyone.' Maddie chuckled softly. 'He's sung me to sleep a couple times before after I had nightmares but that's been our little secret.'

'I'll let you in on another little secret. When Stella and Augie were little, they wouldn't go to sleep without Cordi singing to them.'

'Really?'

Geri nodded. 'Your Dad has a pretty good singing voice. Just don't let him know about that compliment, alright?'

She grinned at her. 'My lips are sealed.'

'Good.'

'I don't mean to pry...' Maddie started after a moment. 'But how are you and Dad going?'

Geri let out a breath. 'We're getting along.'

'That's good.' She paused for a moment. 'You know, I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. If I'm gonna have a mom again, I wouldn't want it to be anyone but you.'

'Oh, Maddie I-um...' She didn't quite know what to say in reply. 'You-you mean that?'

Maddie nodded. 'You remind me a lot of my mom. Kind, gentle, putting other people first and being a shoulder to cry on. You care about people. My mom was like that too.' She paused for a moment, looking over in her fathers direction as he spoke to the Captain. 'Please, can I ask you something?'

'Sure. Anything.'

'Look after Dad for me. If-If anything happens...'

Geri placed a hand on the girl's hand as Maddie's voice trailed off. 'I promise I will be here for him. For all of them.'

She smiled sadly at her, swallowing the lump in her throat. 'Thank you.'

'I know how much your family means to you.' She said gently. 'But things will turn out alright, you'll see.'

'I know.' Maddie replied.

Captain James walked back over to the other side of her bed, placing his hand on her shoulder. 'I'll see you later, okay? You've got this.'

She nodded. 'Thank you sir.'

'Alright. Walker-' He addressed Cordell on his way out. 'You let me know how things go man.'

Cordell nodded. 'Will do sir.'

The Captain closed the door after him on his way out, the only people left in the room with her now were her family and Geri. 'Well-' Maddie started nervously, hoping to break the tension. 'Guess this is getting kinda real now.'

'Ah, yeah...' Cordell exclaimed as they gathered around her bed, Geri catching his hand in hers as he stopped beside her. 'We'll be right here waiting for you when it's all over.'

'I know you will.' She turned to Bonham first. 'Thank you Grampa for what you did for Bel. You saved her and Hope.'

Bonham went over and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. 'You're welcome darlin.'

'Mawline-' Abeline went over next as she called her. 'You have some of those sticky buns of yours ready for when I can have some, okay?'

Abeline nodded as she held her granddaughter tight. 'And some blueberry muffins too.'

'Oh, don't spoil me too much.' She chuckled.

'You deserve to be spoiled.' Her grandmother replied as she tucked a lock of hair back behind her ear. 'I love you so much Maddie.'

Maddie smiled, tears coming to her eyes as she took hold of Abeline's hand, holding it tight. 'I love you too Mawline.'

Abeline stepped back after a moment, Bonham placing his arm around her as Liam stepped up to the bed. 'Remember what I said earlier kiddo.' He said as he gave her a hug. 'You're a warrior Maddie. You might be scared but I know you can get through this.'

'Thank you, Uncle Liam.' She replied and he smiled at her, stroking her cheek gently then stepped back to let Stella and August have a moment. 'You two try not to worry about me too much, okay?' She said as they had a sibling group hug. 'I'm gonna be just fine, you'll see.'

They both nodded, not trusting themselves to speak and went to join their grandparents once more.

'Geri-'

Geri stood, giving the teen a hug. 'Good luck sweetheart.'

'Thank you.' She replied as she hugged her back. 'And thank you, for everything.'

'I meant every word of it.' She assured her. 'We'll see you again real soon.'

Maddie turned to Cordell now, having left her goodbye to her father till last. 'Dad...'

'I'm here baby girl.' Cordell stepped over closer to her bed, stroking her hair back. 'You-you're gonna be just fine honey.' He said, tears in his eyes as he struggled to keep his voice even. 'And when-when you wake up, we-we'll all be here waiting for you.'

Hearing the emotion in her fathers voice threatened to make her cry and she had to force the lump in her throat back before she could reply. 'I-I'll hold you to it.'

'Oh Maddie...'

She sat up, taking her father in her arms as he struggled to hold it together. 'Don't cry Dad...' She sniffled as she rubbed his back. 'I'm gonna be okay. Please don't cry.'

Cordell nodded, forcing his emotions back under control as he held his daughter tight. 'I-I love you so much, baby girl...'

Tears started to slip down her cheeks. 'I love you too Dad.'

A knock sounded on the door, a nurse entering the room. 'Ready?'

After a moment, Maddie let her father go and nodded. 'I-I'm ready.'

The family stepped back to make room for the nurse to reach the bed and as Maddie was started to be wheeled out, she motioned for the nurse to wait for a moment, motioning for her father to come back over to her. She held him tight again, closing her eyes as she committed to memory the feel of his arms around her and the security and comfort his hold brought her.

'You-You'll tell them how much I love them if I don't make it, won't you?' She whispered softly in his ear. 'Tell them I love them and being part of this family has been the best time of my life. Tell them we will meet again one day. Promise me you'll tell them.'

'I-I will honey. I promise, baby girl.' He held her tight then let her go, taking her face in his hands. 'I love you...'

Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks as his voice broke. 'I love you too Daddy.'

Cordell pressed a kiss to her forehead, the nurse clearing her throat to let him know it was time to let go. He didn't want to, didn't want to let her go...

'It's okay, Daddy.' Maddie placed a hand on his cheek as she struggled to hold herself together just a little longer. 'You can let me go now. Try not to worry too much. I'll see you on the other side okay?'

He nodded and finally let her go.

More tears rolled down her cheeks as she was wheeled out of the room, holding her bear and the pony plushie Rose had given her tightly in her arms. It's going to be okay... She told herself as she forced her emotions under control once more. Just breathe. It's going to be okay.

She was taken into another room where they changed her into another gown, everything that happened after that passing by in a blur. Holding onto the feeling of her father's arms around her she kept playing his voice over in his mind as they wheeled her into the operating theater. You're going to be okay. She could hear him say as the anesthesiologist went over with her what they were going to do. You're going to be okay...

They helped her onto the operating table and a heated blanket was placed over her. A minute later they let her know they were ready to begin and a mask was placed over her face, the anesthesiologist asking her to count backwards from ten with him. When she hit seven her eyes were beginning to droop and by the time he had reached five, she was out cold.