Castle in the Sky: The fan fic someone 'actually' wanted.
Written By: Lady Lunar Phoenix
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'I just want to be normal again. If I was normal I could beat this idiot on my own!' Soma thought as he hung in what was typically considered a 'choke hold'. Typical in the sense that Soma was still a plush doll and now in the arms of the Ham Lord that Moon had been facing off against.
Usagi was laboring for breath, her face was stained with dirt, made wet by tears, her normally pristine sailor suit dirty and ragged, the wings torn to dragging like the fallen flag of an army. Once more counting on the Crystal to bring back her friends undoubtedly. But fortunately the Fairies that Alucard had sent to Soma were being useful, providing Life Apples and potions to the fallen Scouts.
But Soma being treated like a shield to keep Usagi from fighting back and Soma was no one's shield! He was also with only plush forms of his normal methods of dealing with aggressive enemies. So he mentally went through all the souls he had and began mentally listing all of the souls he could think of that might actually be of use even if plushed.
Though given how long it had been since he had a meal he did have 'one' soul he could call upon. With Succubus called upon he opened his little mouth and latched on with his felt fangs like he did when he bit Rei. And unlike that bitter old maid, this blood was rather delicious with all the excitement coursing through the man's veins. And the virginity. Plenty of Virginity and Darkness in this one, slurp slurp.
Said Ham Master looked like an 18 year old human with long wavy hair and all in all would have looked attractive Soma figured. Ham Masters' uniform was a rich shade of red with gold accents leaving Soma wondering why so many seemed to dislike silver. In his own opinion silver worked better on any dark color since it was more visible and had a better shine. Even black looked better with silver, gold just looked more accommodating. Only to remember that thing about silver bullets and werewolves... Welp...
Slurp.
'I'm so bored... is this what women go through when waiting to be rescued by the hero in stories? Or was there an undercurrent of fear of sexual assault that kept them from being bored... Probably the undercurrent. I mean if I didn't have a resting 'fuck off' face I'm sure I'd get more than what I normally get in overly determined 'invitations'. That's right, didn't Usagi mention being 14 when she started doing this gig... wow...'
Slurp.
'14... wearing what amounts to a leotard and tiny skirt... I can imagine the horny male demographic's fixation on them. Maybe I shouldn't be so hard on Rei... Maybe that's why she's so distrustful of me. Not because I'm the Dark Lord, but because she's been hit on by enough guys that she just auto assumes anyone with a dominant personality and is male is a threat... This is depressing... maybe I should think of something else...'
Slurp, slurp.
Soma dangled there when his thoughts turned back to his son, and an idea suddenly struck him hard enough to manifest a felt light bulb above his head.
"What? What is this?" Pyrite asked staring down at the felt light bulb as he braced his feet a little better. The plush Lord he had captured was doing something he couldn't see and in irritation he grabbed the plushy and held the doll up for examination.
Noting that Soma was now holding a felt funnel and an felt milk jug.
"What do you think you're doing?" Pyrite demanded as he squinted at the plush doll to help himself focus. Noting distantly that the doll now had gold eyes and fangs sticking out of his mouth.
Soma held up the items while his large gold colored, jeweled eyes were halved from above with eyelids, who then answered in pure deadpanned. "I have a son to feed, now I need your arm."
Suddenly the woozy feeling that had begun assailing Pyrite made sense. This wasn't just 'the Dark Lord' this was 'the VAMPIRE Dark Lord', a realization that made him throw Soma away from him in a panic as he realized that he was being drained of his own blood.
Sailor Chaos rushed forward catching Soma in her arms as he bemoaned aloud...
"I have a greater respect for the common masses in their struggle to feed their young."
"The Young Master won't appreciate the Great Master referring to him in such a manner, he 'will' protest that he is an adult." The fairies noted warily given Dracula's history of emotional self control. Or lack there of.
"I have a greater respect for the single parents among the common masses who try to support their brood only to be treated with such scorn." Soma replied in annoyance, with the funnel and milk jug still dangling from his hands.
"Now that you don't have Master anymore I can finally do something!" Sailor Chaos boasted while Soma developed a red 'x' on his head.
"Please to not be calling me 'master'... People won't understand..." Soma groaned, now if only someone gave half a damn to listen to him when he talked.
Meanwhile Hotaru braved coming out of hiding and dashed as quickly as she could ducking around jagged boulders created by the battle. Already Sailor Chaos had proven to be a great asset in battle, her power was far more versatile and not assigned to any one particular element. That it was also Soma's power also lent for a display of what Soma could possibly do.
And that was rather frightening when one thought on it, for some of her attacks were as strong as several of the scouts combined. But she wasn't going to change back with Soma in the danger zone, and she was 'only' helping the Scouts because Soma was supporting the Scouts. If she had a choice, Hotaru would have preferred that Soma was helping the Princesses. His power was expansive, limited only by his will and he cared for the Scouts because he was actually compassionate.
She caught up to Sailor Chaos and held her arms out for the Plush Soma,"Ah here... Give him to me."
But defensively Sailor Chaos pulled her arms in tighter refusing to give up Soma like a five year old with her favorite plush toy. Her face was set with a determined frown while Soma reached for Hotaru like a child, hands holding funnel and jug, still reaching out to her. "Let me go with Hotaru, you help Sailor Moon, Sailor Chaos!" Soma ordered over the almost mewling sounds of protest from his Castle.
"But Master!" She whined as Pyrite seeing the distraction sent a blast of energy towards the trio.
"GUYS PAY ATTENTION!" Jupiter shouted as she and Uranus put themselves in the way of the blast. If not for the amount of blood Soma had already fed on the blast would have easily slammed pair into the trio standing there.
"Potion!" One of the fairies, honestly Soma didn't care which, called out as it soared towards Jupiter to render aid.
"Sailor Chaos, stop giving me sass, go help Sailor Moon and I'll stay with Hotaru, and that is 'final'." Soma finally ordered with all the imposing force a plush toy could muster. Even with the felt funnel and jug in his hands and his narrowed eyed stare while regretting not coming up with a name for her 'still'.
Sailor Chaos looked down at her Master in distress, aware of the command he had issued and seriously 'not' wanting to be sent away. He had refrained from ordering her back into the seal and she didn't want to push 'that' particular button. So despite the fact she was here to protect 'him', she gave a disgruntle shove, shoving him into Hotoru's arms and turned around to join Sailor Moon against Pyrite.
Hotaru held Soma to her chest as she watched the 14 year old appearing Scout, who should have been a hated enemy, run up to fight along side her princess.
"Soooo we can talk about names to give Sailor Chaos so I can stop calling her 'Castle', or we can talk about maybe hooking Jupiter up with Arikado. Since I got to eat some of her cooking yesterday and I want that woman in my life somewhere, she's a God send master chef. Or we can talk about your breasts because you've just shoved my head between them. Feel free to pick the topic of your choice," Soma deadpanned.
Who would have thought someone like Soma could instantly make Hotaru forget she was Sailor Saturn, forget her position among the scouts, or her very age and react like a typical schoolgirl.. But shoving Soma an arms length away from her.
Where a pair of icy blue glass eyes stared at her.
"Thank you."
"I apologize," She ran off back into hiding with Soma in her arms. Though she did turn him around so he faced forward as she hugged him.
"So this is the stuff that goes on from time to time..." Soma commented as they ran, taking in the destruction around them. "And here I always thought that someone was filming a movie."
"Well yes, people often have ways of coping with mass devastation and large groups passing out or such." Hotaru agreed as she returned to where she had been hiding, heaving breaths of air as her weaken body began protesting.
"Are you ok?" Soma finally asked looking up at her and his funnel disappeared as he reached up to brush her face with his plush hand. "Seriously."
Hotaru gave a rueful smile amid her hard breathing, "I'll be fine, its the trade off for the amount of power I possess as Sailor Saturn." She explained before putting him down as she tried to catch her breath. And somehow the fact that she was leaning against a chunk of concrete while facing a small, sentient, plush toy that was looking up at her struck her as amusing.
Soma had his hands back in his pockets and his felt expression was one of as much concern as one could display on a felt face. "Is that why you're not taking part in this battle?"
She gave a half smile and shook her head, "the power of Saturn is only to be used to end the world." She explained quietly, swallowing painfully though her breathing was slowing down a notch closer to normal speeds.
"So basically he's not worth the power you wield," Soma elaborated with a snicker and his mouth twisted up to express his amusement over the situation. He walked over to take a look at the battle, and now that he was no longer in the way, the girls seemed to be holding better. Especially with Chaos working more to help Sailor Moon. "He tastes good, fine quality of blood right there."
"Soma," she scolded gently, though her voice was amused all the same. "Honestly I thought my heart would stop the moment I saw your eyes turn gold."
"What? I was hungry, stuck in a bird cage and then dragged into a plushy toy hold. I have a right to eat when food is presented before me!" Soma argued with his eyebrows wiggling and his expression one of high amusement despite the lofty seriousness of his voice. Had Soma been given a mirror he wouldn't have said anything.
"Oh come now... If you wanted out... I'm sure there's a toy way to escape..." She offered folding her arms across her chest with a small smile of her own on her face. Only to watch as he began shaking his head 'no'.
"Not really, I tried, but everything is soft and felt like. The cage wasn't something I could eat or wear so it went uneffected. Though Arikado's fairies busted me out so it worked out in the end," Soma explained with a faint shrug. "But I guess it could be worse, I tend to use the Plushy as a decoy not a form to transform 'into'. At least its not doing what it normally does and attracting every non human towards me to attack."
"Well that's one way to look on the bright side," Hotaru agreed, surprised to learn that this form of Soma's wasn't completely out of the blue, rather just reassigned. "Though if I may ask, how does the world not know about the Dark Children or yourself?" She asked refraining from commenting on the Crystal.
"Oh well that's what the Catholic Church does, apparently," Soma amicably confessed before climbing up to sit next to her. "Like the Men in Black in fact."
"Oh I remember when that movie came out... before the reboots at least," Hotaru noted thinking back when she was a kid growing up with Haruka and Michiru.
"I might have if I hadn't been killed... again..." Soma noted before his head cocked a bit to the side. "Then again though, its not as though I left the castle all that much, so I don't know, the Castle never seemed the type of place to find a wide screen tv. Though there was a world war from what I understand as several armies tried to take me on. I even found some zombie soldiers in the Castle..."
"Oh, 'that' was you," Hotaru noted as though recalling something. "I remember seeing it when I was little, it was referred to as a natural disaster. Apparently something 'happened' that required the armed forces to arrive. Then the disaster hit and wiped out the army," she explained tapping her chin lightly as she remembered that day. She recalled Mama Michiru discussing it with Papa Haruka and Mama Setsuna, wondering if it was in their 'jurisdiction'.
"Well I don't remember what happened that day, remembering anything tends to give me a headache. Too many years and memories," Soma noted as he looked up at her. "So... do the girls ever try to off you out of hand for what you are?"
Hotaru blinked in surprise at the question before giving a slight shrug, "I'm not supposed to become active until the end of a world. Ideally that means I'm only born when the world is about to end in the sense of old age. However; well... you see what's been going on I'm sure, and it happens with quite the frequency."
"Yeah... kinda like my life now that there are those who know about me. Either they're trying to force me back to being a Dark Lord, or trying to kill me so someone else can assume the position. And its not like I'm fighting to stop them from taking my spot. Just that when they show up they make very much sure that I know they're threatening my friends." Soma explained resting his face against one hand. "I mean, seriously here, I'm not fighting to stay the Dark Lord, just leave my friends alone and its fine. Do whatever, just don't act surprise when I show up and shove a sword into you."
'Death and destruction here... heh,' Hotaru inwardly chuckled as she lightly patted Soma on the back out of sympathy. When she was originally reborn she knew nothing about Sailor Saturn, then everything involving Mistress 9 and later Sailor Galaxia happened...
"But you do remember 'some' things, right?" She asked for clarification recalling how he casually spoke of the past before. A large explosion from the battle behind them rocking the ground and the wall behind them. But once the sound settled back to something more manageable, Soma resumed his end of the conversation.
"Yes, a lot of it is more emotions though, like I remember the emotions it involves and I go from there. If I can figure out the exact emotion I can follow it to the thoughts that I had and thus memory." Soma explained, "But its not like that's how I use the souls I gather, that is a different type of thought process."
Then as Hotaru sat there, Soma began shuffling closer so they were plush shoulder to rib cage, "say... Hotaru... how did Setsuna take it when Pluto was declassified as a planet?"
Hotaru froze in place, then her eyes began sliding closed as her lips twisted into a pinched kind of smile. She didn't say anything at first, the memory of Setsuna out shopping when station surfing on the tv produced 'that' bit of info. "We say nothing. Not a single scout breathed a 'word' of this to Setsuna, deciding it was far and away better to 'not' upset someone who had the gates of time at her disposal."
"Gates of Time?" Soma repeated for clarification.
"She guards the Gates of Time, so people can't change history," Hotaru explained.
"But... you girls clearly got screwed over by something!" Soma pointed out, earning a tight lipped remorseful smile from the Sailor Scout.
"That's an abuse of power."
'Hi, 'Abuse of power' is literally the description for a lot of the things I've done in my life...' Soma 'almost' said.
Almost.